Normally, I would stay out of this.

I’m not excited about the prospect of INDIANA JONES AND THE FOURTH ADVENTURE or whatever ridiculous awkward temporary title Paramount is using for the film at the moment. To be honest, I never saw the point in continuing to make Indy movies. Sure, I know... it’s all about the money. But even though I’m not a huge LAST CRUSADE fan, I do love the last shot, and I thought it was a fitting end to the series.

In the years since, we’ve heard so many rumors about this movie that it’s become easier just to tune them out. One of the more persistent kinds of rumor is “Guess who will be playing Indy’s brother/sister/son/daughter/random family member,” something that’s always made me nervous. It’s such a desperate move to start inventing family members for Indy, something that smacks of “Cousin Oliver” syndrome. When you’re in trouble and trying to reinvigorate something, just add some cute kids to the family!

Or don’t. Please.

I’ve read one of the recent version of INDY 4, and there were no new family members added. That pleased me greatly. However, they’ve thrown that version out now, and whatever David Koepp’s done, he’s made the people over at Dreamworks very, very happy. And now that they’re getting close to production, I’ve heard a persistent rumor, a new version of that old familiar. The thing is, I’m hearing this from some pretty reliable places.

So here we go again.

Shia La Beouf will play the son of Indiana Jones.

The thing is, we know Spielberg loves La Beouf right now. DISTURBIA became a pet project for The Beard, and it evidently came out well. TRANSFORMERS is a big deal for the company, and a lot of the weight of that falls squarely on the shoulders of Shia. So as much as I pray that there’s no Indy Jr., I’m starting to think that this may in fact be true.

I know adventure has a name. But does it really have to have a son? Really?

Only time will tell.

Drew McWeeny, Los Angeles