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Me Tarzan. You Guillermo.
Ahoy, squirts! Quint here. Looks like Guillermo Del Toro has another project to add to the queue. This time producer Jerry Weintraub wants to team with Guillermo and Warner Bros to make a feature TARZAN. Del Toro says his interest in the property stems from the plan to go back to the original Edgar Rice Burroughs pulp novels for inspriration. He says he wants to make a flick that is edgy (and I'd imagine a little fucked up since that seems to be Guillermo's calling card), but still within the confines of a family adventure story. John Colle (MASTER AND COMMANDER and HAPPY FEET) will script. What think you?
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Del Toro is one of the best things to happen to genre movies in a looooooong time. I would prefer "Mountains of Madness" - but I will gladly welcome his take on Tarzan - because it will be definitive.
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I just wanted to say that I wanna see Jane get her ass farked off of her by an orgy load of apes!!! That slut! I bet she LOVES it. She has a selection of Razorbacks, Gorillas, little farker Spider monkeys, Chimpanzees, Gibbons, - who needs a man!? Tarzan can go shove a tree up his ayass. As long as Jane don't leave out the Orangutan for being ginger and classifying them as ugly. That would give them such a complex and fark them up for life, just like all chicks did me. Heh, if Jane won't have them, I will. I go for redheads. Del TORO, do it! (Palpatine voice) I know what people are thinking right now as they read this - "WE WANNA SEE THIS!!!!!!!! - Jane farking Apes would be cool too."
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....And keep it to family adventure?.... Hell, remake The Wizard of Oz...
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While I dug Hellboy, I am really banking on Pan's Labyrinth being absolutely great. That being said Del Toro might work better with his own material than by working from adapted material. Still I am very excited, this film might introduce Del Toro's work to a more mainstream audience. All this praise might also come from the fact that I cannot wait to see Pan's Labyrinth, easily one of my most anticipated films this year.
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You can count my ass in!
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A want a bloody badass 300 style, beat the shit out of anything that moves, banana eating, babe fucking, vine swinging, chest beating, ape kicking, dark as all hell son of a bitch, that isn't named Lambert, and isn't surrounded by guys in monkey suits.But seriously, family friendly or not, I doubt a Tarzan flick could do much better than Zorro numbers.
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that this has potential to be great with the people involved, you're a cynical moron.
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D'ya think there'll be a scene where like Jane is beign pursued by some bad guy, like maybe a hunter, or mutated jungle creature, or maybe a slug, or an angry rejected and now messed up raging horny Orangutan, and she could like, run into some kind of pit, or a cave, or heck with t, anywhere open in the jungle so everyone can sit and watch, where she runs into some kind of like, living tree planty planty thing, that has like, branches and reeds or whatever, that like, come out and grab her, wrap themselves around her lusciously hot thighs and all of her body, then like, get a good gripping hold of her and then like, start whipping her a little bit, and then like, rip her clothes off, and then like, start shagging the ABSOLUTE JUNGLE BAPS OFF OF HER, and give her a right good seeing to, so much that in the end she will end up loving it, like the WHOORRE(!!!) that she is?!?!? Do ya? Do ya? 'Cos that would be cool. Think Guys, Evil Dead Tree Rape scene - but with Orangutans! - Then I would come in an save her as I look so good with a leaf over my privates, a tree up my ass, and because I'm so hard. Don't give me that shit that I'm all weird and freaky and shit. Yeah so wad if I am?!?! Let me tell YOU something man! I told this story to me ex girlfriend and she actually admitted that it made her wet. Then again, she's a whore that shagged the entire hostel when I was with her. I didn't care, I was too busy looking for young female human equivalent of Orangutans in the woods, only someone told me the other day that New Zealand doesn't have Orangutans. Then again what do they know? Have they toothcombed the forest there at night? It's like judging the Rocky Trailer and thinking you know the ending, even though you haven't seen the film. How do you know Rocky won't box the shit out of an Orangutan at the end of the movie, just 'cos the hype doesn't show a clip of this? Well then, SHUT UP!!!! Anyway, I told some other chicks about the tree rape thing, and they are all WELL UP FOR IT!!!!! Some even talked about getting shagged by tentacles, so I'll put that in there too. DEL TORO - WE WANNA SEE THIS!!!!!!! The only people who don't are stuck up boring people trying ot pass themselves off as intelligent, who only like stuck up boring films trying to pass themselves off as intelligent, like Barry Levinson movies. Fucking Diner........................................................................................................................ Fucking Orangutans.
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Dec 15, 2006 12:42:55 AM CST
but we still get the phil colins soundtrack right ?
by jeanluc dickhard
BECAUSE FUCK THIS IF I DONT GET PHIL COLINS........
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Dec 15, 2006 12:45:18 AM CST
Not necessarily what I would have chosen for him....
by industrykiller!
...but then again I'm not him. I think at least it will be a damn good Tarzan film. Just not a huge Tarzan fan. But yeah, I'd go see it. And I'm not scared that he uses the word "family". Remember back in the day family films could be quite awesome and pretty macabre. Jim Hensons stuff comes to mind. I've really wanted a filmmaker to come along and make movies like that and Del Toro may be the man to do it.
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For instance maybe DON'T cast someone who is, or ever has been, a male model? They are always milquetoast at best. Cast someone who is believe able in that position. SOmeone feral and dangerous but has soul, like a young Benecio Del Toro type.
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note to hollywood, here's an event-type movie that isn't the same as everything else out right now.
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that is all.
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But 'Greystoke' was just a torture porn with monkeys.
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Wow, hope this pans out. I'm there.
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You got something against Monkey Porn, Sucka? You certainly don't have Jane against you then, do ya? Jane's against me, rubbing away at me as if I'm a tree - as I'm so hard, and 'cos at least I! - am into Spunky Monkey Porn. Or maybe I can persuade you then?! - GET HIM, URANGUTANS!!!!!!!!!!
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And I think that they should keep it family friendly so I can take my family to see Tarzan because that is what my family would want.
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Get the book "A Feast Unknown" by Phillip Jose Farmer. Tarzan and Doc Savage are half-brothers, and have a huge fight to the death. Also, Doc and his cousin Pat are long time lovers.
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...that probably won't ever happen. Wake me up when he's actually signed on and in production on something, then I'll get interested.
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He may have it in him, but he needs to show some restraint.
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be great, in the hands of the right people.
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Some white dude swinging through the jungle does not really fit the bill anno 2006 I think. l Toro rather see Del Toro make a Jungle Book sequel..
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I think I can piece the out of place letters used to form words, but I was just wondering if you were half asleep when you typed this?
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if this isnt demented im going to be severely disappointed. greystoke is going to be fairly hard to top.
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This Tarzan is a pretty tired story that's already been reinterpreted a number of times, so it seems like the only place left to go is space. Tarzan in space - a man raised in the space jungle by the space apes has to find his way in the terrestrial world. Classic fish out of water, etc. - Crocodile Dundee meets Starman meets Greystoke, and such and such. There will be much hilarity as we see that space Tarzan does not understand our strange earth customs such as bidets and gravity and not flinging poo and so on. Available in all Blockbuster stores, March 2007.
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is that Dutch translated into English or some newfound street language?
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we need the look of Greystoke with the pacing of Hellboy and that's what we should get
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Fucking hell yeah! This is soo right,
I can imagine it's going to be raw, brutal, and with Del Torro's innate feel for characterization a defining Tarzan flick. I want to see it now! -
... that her animated-version played. With a loin-cloth that falls off.
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del Toro could direct "Captain Panaka - The Movie" and I would still see it. With Pan he established himself as one of the most interesting directors working at the moment.
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Jungle spiderman anyone? My fingers are firmly crossed.
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Damn you Michael Bay
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An unknown? I don't want to speculate cos I'm not into beefcake, but it should be a dude with some action experience. I'm thinking Hayden Christensen or Justin Chambers. Or even Ewan or Colin Farrell if he's not too old. Somebody that's kicked ass in movies before, but a real actor too.
And for God's sake get Keira to play Jane. -
Dec 15, 2006 4:47:20 AM CST
Pan's Labyrinth is the first thing that he has made...
by purityofessence
... that I liked. I found Hellboy to be fairly boring and thought Blade II was stupid as hell. But Pan's Labyrinth is pretty solid. I don't know yet if it deserves the hype it is getting, I have to digest it first.
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lots of cool critters doing cool things in the jungle. Tarzan fighting apes, snakes or whatever he fights in an over the top fantastical/dark jungle would be fucking cool. Hope he does it right after Hellboy2.
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Has a Tarzan project ever been a success? Guillermo and Co would have to do some pretty amazing stuff to make this work and get people to want to see it. Personaly I think the whole concept of Tarzan is a piece of shit but that's just me.
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Feeding and some goddam acting lessons!
I don;t want it family friendly, I wanna see Tarzan slitting the throats of stupid greedy white men dammit! -
Tarzan kills a lot of Africans and British and French guys alike. But Warners would never do a movie like that. Maybe one of these days we'll get Alexandre Aja's Tarzan, but I'm not holding my breath...
BTW - Rose Byrne would be an amazing Jane too! -
is amazing, and it seems to be doing really well here in the UK. So I'll watch whatever he does next, however I think his other projects sound more interesting.
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...its not necessarily top of my wishlist for films, but Del Toro does seem to have a keen eye for the visual, if nothing else. Right now I just think he's 'good' rather than 'great' - but I'm happy to be proved wrong by the next films he makes. I just don't know where else they are going to go with the Tarzan name, do you do 'Tarzan, protector of Jane against crocodile complete with comedy chimp'...or do you do 'Greystoke but better'. I like the sound of a brutal Tarzan, complette with spidey-esque vine-swinging moments. but how brutal would Del Toro be interested in going? You cvan bet your money right now that the 'black-hearted white hunter' will be English to the core. probably with a south African henchman. Fucking Hollywood.
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Using 'The Crow'-esque technology I would like to see the staple 'Tarzan fights Croc to the death' scene - but with a digitally created Irwin jumping in the river mid-fight, and jamming his thumb up Tarzan's butt...
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I love me some GDT but I don't really care at this point.
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Tarzan.
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. . . but I would want to see it AFTER Mountains of Madness & his Gill-Man in the Amazon thingy.
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Yeah but Doc, what about the theories of Jane being a complete whore and getting it one with the whole entire jungle? What are your suggestions on that, and my premises? I'm sure you want a portion of that. Don't forget too guys that Vin Rip Diesel or whatever that guy was from Starship Troopers and Jane March did Tarzan a few years ago. No one knows, see? Not a good sign for this.
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like a live action disney movie
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IMO, it's debatable. No one signs on for this many projects, has *none made* and can be considered a top choice. I'm not implying he can't get financing, he certainly can - but he attaches to every non-starter mentioned.
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Is if Casper Van Dien stars.
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Thank you very much.
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YAWN! I don't care who directs this 100th version of TARZAN its just LAZY. After the SHADOW Remake look for DICK TRACY, HULK and SMURF remakes...
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After Pan's Labyrinth, I'd trust him to make anything. Especially if it is to feature a CGI copy of a young Johnny Weissmuller,
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Seriously. What's to like? Society brat raised by apes, becomes feral, gets found, meets girl, tries to be society adult but fails, goes back to jungle. End of story. ZZZZZZzzzzzz
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and Hayden Christensen as Jane and turn it into gay porn
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I like old pulp stuff as much as the next guy but neither of these projects sounds at all interesting to me... just evidence that Hollywood is happiest with a presold property even when there's nothing left to say or do with such a character (coff-Superman-coff). There are wonderful stories no one has ever made a movie of. Perhaps someone should try one of them.
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Tarzan: Feels like an Arby's night.
Jane: Get out!
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As an earlier posted wrote, setting out with the goal of making a family film AND returning to the spirit of Burroughs' novels is contradictory. Can't be done.
The novels are quite violent and brutal and that's a big part of their appeal.
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About the English class system and what separates us from lower apes and such. I want a powerful drama that really gets into this real discussion of things, with the dichotomy of the books as mentioned above (well-bred gentleman who resorts to animalistic tendencies). I wouldn't want a loincloth-girded adventure fest. And it will have Teh Suxxor love/sex with an apeman subplot. That is what I am not looking forward to.
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If they're aiming for the old pulpy feel of the novels, that could work, although ERB's books tend to be pretty formulaic. Imaginative though, especially for the era they were written in. Perhaps we'll get to see Opar and all of the half-breed men-apes and La.
Speaking of ERB projects, anyone know anything about John Carter of Mars? I heard it dropped by Paramount. Harry, you had your hands in that one—what's the scoop? I'd rather see a John Carter movie than a Tarzan one. Tharks are cooler than apes. -
Me, 4 Tarzan! Lead, BENICIO DEL TORO.
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Tarzan - wtf?!?! Unless there some early 80's Bo Derek monkey fucking - which if it were I wouldn't see it - then who cares.Do the damnJungle Book again - for real this time! Hellboy now dammit!
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How about getting something into pre-production?
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If they finally and truly use the old Edgar Rice Burroughs pulp novels as the basis ... FANTASTIC. I love Tarzan movies. Tarzan and the Lost City was just weird and not any good. It was made as vehicle for Jane March as much as Bo Derek's version was for Bo. Christopher Lambert's started good ... but was too much an art-house version of Tarzan and they never even called him that once (though you'd have thought that when they finally released the special edition DVD they'd finally get rid of Glen Close's VO of Andie McDowall)._______ I'm looking forward to this new version of TARZAN. I hope it is a good as I imagine it can be with Guillermo Del Toro at the helm.______ Great that they got all the Weissmuller Tarzan's on DVD now ... but I want the Lex Barker one's and ESPECIALLY the wide-screen glory of Gordon Scott's best TARZAN'S GREATEST ADVENTURE and the wide-screen versions of Jock Mahoney's and Mike Henry's Tarzan flicks. I loved those most of all. TARZAN'S GREATEST ADVENTURE is probably the best Tarzan movie ever. Check it out with Sean Connery as one of the villains!!!
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what the fuck is up with that, harry?
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Probably the best film Christopher Lambert ever made. Plus a young Andie Mcdowell, and Bilbo himself Ian Holm. If you haven't seen it, check it out.
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Harry is out. The Transformers producer is doing it now.
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I've read all of the Burrough's Tarzan novels and this could be utterly fantastic if they treated the source with respect ala LOTR and Potter. But if they do then the movie has to be R rated, and I mean a hard R. Throats slit, decapitations, bare breasts, the works.
I've dreamt of the day I'd see the book Tarzan The Terrible on the big screen complete with Tarzan and a lion tearing through a German platoon in northern Africa during WWI. TARZAN and a LION killing Germans by the truckload? Gawd that movie would kick ass. -
http://movies.yahoo.com/movie/1808716430/photo/970420325
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Guillerme seems to have a grasp on Spielbrg's golden rule. He'll be around for decades. One problem - how do you make Tarzan for a modern audience without all it's inherent Empirical colonialism/racism..?
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I couldn’t be more pleased. Del Toro’s Tarzan and Sam Rami’s Shadow. Too cool. I would love to see Robert E. Howard’s Conan on the big screen once more too. Come to think of it Harry Knowles’ John Carter of Mars would be pretty cool to see as well.
To read these original stories is to love them. ERB took a lot of heat for not being “literary” enough to please the highbrow set. The highbrows are gone and what remains? The stories. Maxwell Grant (a pseudonym used initially by Walter B. Gibson and then his successors) was hired to breath life into The Shadow and Robert E. Howard cranked out an amazing amount of pulp fiction including boxing tales, westerns and a new genre that he invented, ‘Sword and Sorcery.’
All right, I’m done. Go read ‘em.
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...will never see the light of day. GDT will not have the creative license necessary to make this rehashed story interesting and ultimately he'll walk away leaving it to Michael Bay to pick up the pieces.
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Yawn...How about something new.
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I remember reading a whole boatload of Tarzan comics as a kid and many of them were quite dark and disturbing. Very along the lines of Conan and raw pulp like that - human sacrifice, giant and/or mutated beasts, land-that-time-forgot sub-humans, - set in a simulataneously believeable Africa (bureaucracy and civil war or the edge of the jungle)and fantasy land (wise shamans, cursed treasure)with bloodshed and good guys and bad guy getting killed left and right. Not of all of it would be PC, I guess. i don't know if the Burroughs book is like that, but if Del Toro leaves aside Encino Tarzan and goes for some of that stuff, I'll be first in line.
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It was sort of like the Burroughs novels, TARZAN AND THE LOST CITY OF GOLD and TARZAN AND THE LEOPARD MEN.
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Del Toro seems to get tons of love on thi site and I have NO IDEA why (other than from Harry who has a connection). I want to love all his movies due to the subject, but they are mediocre. Another problem is that though Tarzan is a GREAT character- he will never be done well on film as he is far to Politically incorrect (unlike the show)- and thoiugjh I LOVE the idea of going back to the books- they will certainly never be done right a s a “family friendly” movie. Tarzan- has NEVER been done right- not even close- and if you read (especially the 1st book). He is a somewhat Brutal/if noble character in a brutal world. Also, I don’t know how you can pull off the whole “talking to Apes” thing in a film and not seem silly. They tried this in Grestoke, but so much was lost in the final product that it was just meh…
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at least tarzan sucks to begin with.
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Is hollywood purposefully getting DelTorro to ruin my favorite stories? First Hellboy, soon lovecraft and now fucking Burroughs?
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It has been done so many times before.
YOu would have to bring a new angle and one badass jungle like in King Kong. I would like to see Tarzan vs Predator.
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