Movie News

Here Comes CLEOPATRA (Again, Again)!!

Published at: Dec. 1, 2006, 9:30 a.m. CST

Merrick here...
Producer Scott Rudin (THE QUEEN, THE TRUMAN SHOW, THE VILLAGE, and many others ) has plugged into the movie adaptation of a yet-to-be-published book about Cleopatra by Pulitzer Prizer Stacy Schiff. The book’s rights were recently secured by Columbia Pictures, even though publication likely won’t come about until at least 2009. I’m humbled by such farsighted planning; perhaps I need to start thinking ahead. In 2009…I’ll definitely go to Taco Bell.
Book will present her as a firm ruler and military tactician who embarked on a ruthless rise to power. Cleopatra twce married brothers, killing each of them as well as a sister. Romantic alliances with the much-older Roman honchos Julius Caesar and Marc Antony helped her solidify power, but her dalliance with Antony undid both of them.
Wikipedia says there have been, like, 800 trillion CLEOPATRA projects thus far: notably in 1912, 1917, 1920, 1934, 1963, and 1999. She’s also appeared as a character in many other productions. It’ll be interesting to see how “fresh” the idea/character will actually feel, despite their best intentions. I once had a brief...encounter...with a smolderin’ half Latin/half Egyptian babe who dressed as Cleopatra for Halloween; don’t know where she is now. As a result, this film may be frustratingly fetishistic for me.

MORE!!!

At the risk of sounding far too Geeky (is that possible on this site?), it's too bad Captain Kirk never took on Cleopatra -- that woulda been cool. Guess they came close with Elan of Troyus…

Readers Talkback

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  • Dec. 1, 2006, 9:01 a.m. CST

    As long as Angelina Jolie's not Cleopatra...

    by Ribbons

    ...well... I admire Scott Rudin's work ethic, but yeah, not terribly interested. Still... no Jolie as Cleopatra. Surprise me Hollywood.

  • Dec. 1, 2006, 9:12 a.m. CST

    "It’ll be interesting to ssee"

    by knightrider

    Was that a deliberate Cleopatra-based typo, asphole?

  • Dec. 1, 2006, 9:15 a.m. CST

    meh

    by testicleez

    This movie will be a snore fest of epic proportions.

  • Dec. 1, 2006, 9:15 a.m. CST

    Come on

    by Pandas

    Everyone knows that there is a version of Cleopatra that just can't be topped, so it's not even worth trying. That version is of course, Carry on Cleo.

  • Dec. 1, 2006, 9:16 a.m. CST

    Hottest Cleopatra...

    by Abin Sur

    In recent memory, was the girl who played her in the "Rome" series...can't remember her name, but she was a DISH.

  • Dec. 1, 2006, 9:20 a.m. CST

    Infamy, infamy, they've all got it in for me

    by mulberry

    I propose the rest of this talkback is dedicated to quotes from Carry on Cleo. Cleopatra, comin' at ya'.

  • Dec. 1, 2006, 9:24 a.m. CST

    Does Cleopatra 2525 count?

    by veritasses

    Just asking.

  • Dec. 1, 2006, 9:29 a.m. CST

    Comin' atcha

    by Franklin T Marmoset

    Ever since I saw the opening segment of The Mummy I've been waiting to see a full scale ancient Egyptian story told with all the benefits of modern CGI jiggery pokery, and this pretty much fits the bill. It's definitely a good story, with a great central character. I just hope it doesn't go the way of Alexander and Kingdom Of Heaven and some of the other historical epics that haven't lived up to expectations.

  • Dec. 1, 2006, 9:28 a.m. CST

    who does evryone think should be cleo?

    by visitor_q

    id go for jessica alba or salma "booooooooooooobies!" hayek,

  • Dec. 1, 2006, 9:30 a.m. CST

    How come the guys never sleep their way to power

    by StovetopStuffin'

    women have it so easy. :) all kidding aside, I hope they cast someone who actually at least looks a little like what cleopatra would have looked. Not some white chick with too much eye makeup.

  • Dec. 1, 2006, 9:29 a.m. CST

    Captain Kirk would have SO tapped that Egyptian ass

    by TheAFLACDuck

    ... and you just know there was a planet out there that was exactly like Egypt (like on Futurama!!).

  • Dec. 1, 2006, 9:30 a.m. CST

    Hey

    by QuinnTheEskimo

    I'm not sure about those casting pics - don't historians think Cleopatra was actually not attractive? I seem to remember hearing that. Not that I am opposed to hot Egyptian ladies, mind you. Or, Greek, I suppose, since that's what she actually was.

  • Dec. 1, 2006, 9:35 a.m. CST

    Cleopatra was FAT in real life...

    by Abin Sur

    Who the hell wants to watch that? I guess you could cast the girl that plays "Ugly Betty..."

  • Dec. 1, 2006, 9:41 a.m. CST

    Or....

    by Abin Sur

    Mo'nique? Better choice.

  • Dec. 1, 2006, 9:42 a.m. CST

    What about Cleo from 5 to 7?

    by Spandau Belly

    France is kinda Egypt.

  • Dec. 1, 2006, 9:45 a.m. CST

    kirstie allie as cleopatra?

    by Jubba

    i don't know about that....

  • Dec. 1, 2006, 9:49 a.m. CST

    Walk like an Egyptian.

    by Uncapie

    Bangels.

  • Dec. 1, 2006, 9:54 a.m. CST

    Rosario Dawson?

    by Abin Sur

    Not bad. But how about Miss Clio? Does she count?

  • Dec. 1, 2006, 9:59 a.m. CST

    Well I once had an ..."Encounter"

    by beefywhore

    with a chick who looked lik ME with a wig on...honesty sucks..as does tequila

  • Dec. 1, 2006, 10:02 a.m. CST

    ZombieSolutions

    by DrManhattansUnit

    We're saying Greek isn't white now? Don't tell the Greeks, many of them are a little sensitive about that kind of thing!

  • Dec. 1, 2006, 10:03 a.m. CST

    Cleopatra

    by Purgatori

    was actually not a svelt vixen like Rosario. She was curvy and short. Alley is more her build, but she's too tall if you want to get technical. Salma Hayek would be good.

  • Dec. 1, 2006, 10:09 a.m. CST

    RighteousBrother

    by Merrick

    I'm *so* tempted to say I was her slave/servant, but that wouldn't be right & I'd never live it down. I didn't have a costume when I met her. I mean...I was wearing clothes (when I met her)...but not a costume (yet. JUST KIDDING!)

  • Dec. 1, 2006, 10:10 a.m. CST

    Someone just film Shakespeare's Anthony and Cleopatra

    by Sepulchrave

    Man, that is one fantastic play. And the Cleo in that is a fucking force of nature. 'Let him be whipped with wires and STEWED IN BRINE!!' Madwoman.

  • Dec. 1, 2006, 10:12 a.m. CST

    Aishwarya Rai

    by Mr. Winston

    No one is history was more directly geared to play Cleopatra. Sign her up and I'll see this one in a second.

  • Dec. 1, 2006, 10:17 a.m. CST

    Actually, Cleopatra Was Neither Latin Nor Egyptian

    by MarkWhittington

    Cleopatra was likely Macedonian and Greek in her ancestory without a drop of Egyptian and certainly no Latin blood in her.

  • Dec. 1, 2006, 10:23 a.m. CST

    Mr. Winston is a genuis!

    by TheAFLACDuck

    Aishwarya Rai would be aces. Also, you were great in Ghostbusters, sir.

  • Dec. 1, 2006, 10:23 a.m. CST

    My pick is...

    by Driver8

    Selma Hayek 'nuff said.

  • Dec. 1, 2006, 10:43 a.m. CST

    Aya Sumika

    by Shermdawg

    From the shortlived, yet entertaining, Hawaii.

  • Dec. 1, 2006, 10:44 a.m. CST

    The chick with the blue eyes from Gimore Girls...

    by torontoxic

    ...and Sin City. Alexis Blesomething. That's my pick. She's a little young now but by the time this comes out she'll be right. <P> Can't wait for all the dumbass "she was dark skinned!" racist jackasses to run around crying. In advance to all thsoe people SUCK MY NUTS. Nobody gives a fuck about your culture or racial bias so STFU. Aishwarya Rai is WAY too dark. Think Elizabeth Taylor. <P> Hope this movie has nudity and/or violence.

  • Dec. 1, 2006, 10:49 a.m. CST

    Every thread should be Carry On related...

    by dr_buggerlugs

    ...in fact, has there ever been any Carry On related topics/threads on here? When are we gonna get Moriarty eaxing lyrical about our beloved saucy comedy series? Viva la Vic Flange!

  • Dec. 1, 2006, 10:48 a.m. CST

    Call me back when it's a remake of Cleopatra Jones!

    by Kid Z

    ... Maybe then I'll be interested!

  • Dec. 1, 2006, 10:54 a.m. CST

    Will Richard Burton appear via CGI?

    by Doctor_Sin

    I predict a crappy soundtrack featuring a lame "inspired by" rap song making much use of the word "asp." Word.

  • Dec. 1, 2006, 10:57 a.m. CST

    She was Greek

    by torontoxic

    The only inconsistency in the records of her bloodline is a lack of documentation on her grandmother. Desperate 'academics' of various races cling to that as meaning that <i>maybe</i> she was mixed race. Then they get shit on by everyone so they go overboard and shout "no we're really sure she was black" just to be dicks. <P> My fav is when people say Jesus was black. Could you imagine how awesome he would have looked up on the cross with a 3 foot pimpin afro? No one debates the man had long hair right?

  • Dec. 1, 2006, 10:57 a.m. CST

    Can't wait to see her shag her brothers

    by aestheticity

    Wonder if she ever did them both at the same time

  • Dec. 1, 2006, 10:59 a.m. CST

    supermarch

    by Doctor_Sin

    A blaxploitation Jesus is the funniest image I have ever imagined. Thank you.

  • Dec. 1, 2006, 11:06 a.m. CST

    Jesus Christ

    by Mr. Winston

    This hasn't even been up for five minutes and there's already some ranting, raving lunatic who thinks he's the historical liaison to the film. <br> <br> I don't give a hopping fuck if she was Greek or Macedonian or Chinese or if she smelt of myrrh and Triscuts. I want Aishwarya Rai because in all my dozing states where I wondered what Cleopatra might look like - which haven't been many - that's what she looked like. <br> <br> I hope you end up in jail for something, supermarch. You're instantly annoying enough to make me wish that.

  • Dec. 1, 2006, 11:07 a.m. CST

    Supermarch...

    by Napolean Solo

    The Bible says Jesus had hair the texture of wool, and skin the color of burnt brass... If that means 'Pimpin' to Kramers such as yourself then so be it. With that beign THE ONLY description of Jesus in the bible, 'my fav' is when people such as yourself, imply Jesus was anything other than black. Now go and watch some Seinfeld.

  • Dec. 1, 2006, 11:13 a.m. CST

    Anyone else remember the shitty movie...

    by Doctor_Sin

    "A Man Called Sarge"? It was a BAD Airplane! style film set in WWII. I mean, awful puns and everything. Only saving grace was a musical number where the Christian missionary is singing to some kids a song called "Jesus Was a Black Dude." Otherwise, horrible. Oh yeah, back to Cleopatra. Make it a hard-R/Unrated softcore sexploitationer and film it on location like those Laura Gemser Black Emmanuelle movies. Then, I'll go see it.

  • Dec. 1, 2006, 11:24 a.m. CST

    Napoleon Solo

    by Almost_Human

    Ever been on a sheep farm? Sheep have a thick coat that when not matted from being to long is more like the small curls and wavy hair you might see on someone from the Mediterranean. Sorry, but the curl just isn't tight enough for that to be a valid analysis. If it was, after a rain or a good washing, sheep would look like walking afros, not some white kid trying to be a rasta. It was a funny image and perhaps you are being a tad thin skinned. Michael Richards is dipshit though. No questioning that, racist hack without the skills to deal with hecklers -- And we need another Cleopatra movie like we need another Donald Rumsfeld.

  • Dec. 1, 2006, 11:25 a.m. CST

    I would like to apologize

    by torontoxic

    For making the stick rub up against the pickle up Mr Winston's ass. I don't give a fuck what you hope for. You're instantly annoying enough to dismiss as another person not worth acknowledging any further you irritable penisbutt. <P> Napoleon, the bible says a lot of things. Crazy things. People who take everything at face value are just trying to manipulate it to adhere to their own agenda. You sir are the blatant racist. I don't give a fuck about Jesus. I was making a joke you monumental moron. Maybe I'll go watch Seinfeld? Maybe I'll go stick a cross up my butt and bang a black chick in the face? Whatever I end up doing I'd bet good money that my day will be more exciting and rewarding that the culmination of your entire life's experiences. <P> Malcolm X was Swedish.

  • Dec. 1, 2006, 11:24 a.m. CST

    Cleopatra my great grandma, grandma was a slut

    by greekopa

    grannies gotta do what shes gotta do

  • Dec. 1, 2006, 11:29 a.m. CST

    chickychow

    by Merrick

    You're just jealous.

  • Dec. 1, 2006, 11:33 a.m. CST

    Anyone who watches Rome knows who should

    by modlight

    play Cleo. Aiaiaiai, one of the greatest episodes of television ever.

  • Dec. 1, 2006, 11:49 a.m. CST

    As long as they NEVER consider Lindsey Lohan

    by IndustryKiller!

    Who, contrary to popular belief, is not all that attractive. More like a cute girl at a college party who you wouldn't say no to than tabloid queen. Ditto goes for her talent level.

  • Dec. 1, 2006, 1:01 p.m. CST

    "Not Out of Africa"...

    by McCroskey

    ...by Mary Lefkowitz is an excellent book that addresses the question of Cleopatra's race. The bottom line is that she was either completely Macedonian/Greek, or mostly so, as the identity of one of her grandmothers (her father's mother)is not known. Modern claims that she was black are mostly unfounded nonsense. As to this new project; its understandable if they want to present a more positive picture of the last Pharaoh than was given by the Romans, but I just hope it doesn't go too far in some sort of feminist screed, that props her up at the expense of her conqueror, Octavian. Cleopatra was a formidable and effective queen, but Octavian and his general Agrippa proved superior to both her and Mark Antony. That's why she lost, and Octavian won.

  • Dec. 1, 2006, 1:09 p.m. CST

    WELL/DAWSON

    by THE KNIGHT

    She sounds like a nice choice! Doesn't hurt she has some decent acting chops and she's easy on the eyes...

  • Dec. 1, 2006, 1:33 p.m. CST

    There will only be one Cleopatra in my book...

    by Vim Fuego

    ... Amanda Holden in "Carry on Cleo". It must be crazy English sense of humour, but it's one of my favourite films of all time. "Infamy, Infamy; They've all got it Infamy!"

  • Dec. 1, 2006, 1:49 p.m. CST

    I'm watching Rome right now.

    by Quin the Eskimo

    and so far I gotta say my fovorite part is when Julias Ceaser and Cleopatra come out with that baby, and Titus Pullo is rejoicing then panic reaches his eyes.

  • Dec. 1, 2006, 2:17 p.m. CST

    I prefer the Steven Soderbergh musical version

    by Poacher

    that he was talking about doing with Catherine Zeta Jones and songs/music by Robert Pollard of Guided by Voices around the time of "Bubble". I'm sure he was joking but it sounded damn cool to me, and would've probably been one of the biggest bombs/cult classics ever.

  • Dec. 1, 2006, 2:52 p.m. CST

    I'll second the Aishwarya Rai nomination.

    by Imagikafan

    She'd be perfect for the role.

  • Dec. 1, 2006, 3:18 p.m. CST

    Eva Green

    by DaleTremont

    Eva Green or nothing.

  • Dec. 1, 2006, 4:23 p.m. CST

    when you said more, i expected pics of the chick

    by s0nicdeathmonkey

    i was disappointed to only find scrawl written is pseduo-english.

  • Dec. 1, 2006, 4:52 p.m. CST

    Angelina IS Cleo

    by heywood jablomie

    There's really no one else.

  • Dec. 1, 2006, 5:10 p.m. CST

    Nefertiti was the hot one.

    by superninja

    Asia Argento would make a good Cleopatra. In all likelyhood they're going to overly romanticize her again anyway.

  • Dec. 1, 2006, 5:13 p.m. CST

    Angelina in a period

    by DaleTremont

    Angelina in a period piece...wait, yes, i think i see it! Oh fuck. Nope that's just her in Alexander. *shiver* Please let's not repeat that travesty again.

  • Dec. 1, 2006, 6:44 p.m. CST

    I wanna see Rosario Dawson

    by godoffireinhell

    get bitten in her glorious boobs by a snake. I spank it until it bleeds.

  • Dec. 1, 2006, 6:48 p.m. CST

    Rating? PG-13 or Rated R?

    by godoffireinhell

    Because I hate bloodless and family friendly historical epics.

  • Dec. 1, 2006, 6:47 p.m. CST

    They are still making Historical Epics?

    by godoffireinhell

    It is nice that they are still making historical epics at all - or at least planning to! I'd have thought this genre was dead after both KINGDOM OF HEAVEN (the butchered Rothman Cut) and ALEXANDER bombed hardcore.

  • Dec. 1, 2006, 8:37 p.m. CST

    godfireinhell

    by torontoxic

    Alexander <P> budget - $155 million worldwide gross - $167,298,192 <P> Profit - 12,296,192 <P> Over 12 million in profit. Not bad at the end of the day <P> Kingdom of Heaven <P> Budget - 155 million <P> worldwide gross - $211,643,158 <P> profit - 56,431,158 <P> Neither were bombs ("hardcare" or otherwise). Sure there are marketing budgets to consider but those get more than covered in TV rights sales and DVD releases which usually equal or out number gross anymore anyway. <P> Historical epics are not only profitable but some of the best movies in history were said epics.

  • Dec. 1, 2006, 10:04 p.m. CST

    Joe D'Amato should direct this

    by godoffireinhell

    He made some great historical porno movies.

  • Dec. 1, 2006, 11:43 p.m. CST

    Do they have the guts to make her Greek and hook-nosed?

    by Drath

    The real Cleopatra was not a "babe," images of her on coins show her with a nose that would put Margret Hamilton's witch to shame. And she was of Greek descent, the Greeks had conquered Egypt during Alexander the Great's day and one of his generals was Cleopatra's ancestor, so she was not black or latino or whatever the current popular idea is for her on here. But will they dare to try to make her more like she was, or will they shoot for the modern myth of her? I'm not against fantasy, but I'd kinda like to see them do something different. Hats off to HBO's Rome, even though they didn't make her as homely as she probably was and even though she was not the focus of the series at all.

  • Dec. 2, 2006, 12:24 a.m. CST

    Big nose, hawklike features.

    by superninja

    As I said, Asia Argento.

  • Dec. 2, 2006, 12:25 a.m. CST

    Cleopatra's Looks

    by Almost_Human

    True. She's not a looker on the coins. Maybe she performed . . . special services. On top of being a first class political operator and general smart person.

  • Dec. 2, 2006, 12:43 a.m. CST

    Ahhhh...Asia Argento as Cleopatra

    by Red Ned Lynch

    IT won't happen. Let's face it, it SHOULDN'T happen. But I just saw the whole movie inside my head and it was wonderful. From among those top 12 or so Hollywood stars that the movie probably will be cast from? It probably would have to be Angelina Jolie, if only because she would be a better fit than Roberts, Diaz, Barrymore, Witherspoon, Dunst, Kidman or any of those others currently at the top of the ladder. Person I'd most like to see it who probably won't? Rosario Dawson, of course. Unless someone decides they will risk the movie on making her that kind of star. Person who might be positioning herself to have a good chance by the time the movie is cast, and one that seems to me an possibly cool choice? Eva Mendes.

  • Dec. 2, 2006, 4:05 a.m. CST

    short, ugly, greek....

    by Trader Groucho 2

    Tom Cruise in drag???

  • Dec. 2, 2006, 4:28 a.m. CST

    Catherine Zeta Jones

    by Shermdawg

    There ya go.

  • Dec. 2, 2006, 10:11 a.m. CST

    Actually, Cleo wasn't a slut.

    by glodene

    Caesar & Mark Anthony was attracted to her intelligence. They found her unique as oppose to all of their concubines (baby mommas), who were nothing more than brain-dead bimbos. Supposedly, their post-coital pillow-talk consisted of debating/discussing philosophies, politics, war strategies & such. Ceasar & Mark Anthony found that shit intoxicating and refreshing.

  • Dec. 2, 2006, 10:56 a.m. CST

    supermarch and box office grosses

    by McCroskey

    That's not how it goes. Studios do not collect all of the box office revenue. In the US, it generally works out to where they collect a little over half of the box office gross. I don't know what their typical split of the foreign box office is. So while you're right that Alexander and Kingdom of Heaven weren't bombs, they also did not turn a profit from box office alone.

  • Dec. 2, 2006, 12:31 p.m. CST

    McCroskey

    by torontoxic

    Yeah I know but it's a pretty good indication of how they performed. There is no typical split but there's about 1000 headaches worth of accounting to consider if we're going to get precise. Bottom line is people shouldn't gauge quality by what they heard from their friends. Plus since when is the box office take the single indication of how good a movie is?

  • Dec. 2, 2006, 1:09 p.m. CST

    Cleopatra Coin Likenesses

    by Anino

    Come on--how accurate were coin likenesses? How detailed can you be on a tiny piece of metal? Compare the busts of Caesar to Caesar on the coins and there is a big difference. His busts make him look human, the coins make him look like bird. So--use the coin as a starting point, use history to show her ancestry is Macedonian--then infer from the fact that discriminating AND legendary womanizers like Caesar and Antony both went nuts over her...maybe she wasn't gorgeous at the get go--but maybe you need to cast someone that mesmerizes, someone whose looks grow on you. Now THERE's a casting challenge. And yeah, it's a very very interesting story--I don't care if it's been done a bajillion times--I still don't think it's been done right. It's epic, it will definitely involve HUGE ASS battles, and enough romance to attract the chick flick crowd (but not overly chick-flick). There's incest, there's intrigue, snakes...what else do you need?

  • Dec. 2, 2006, 4:40 p.m. CST

    Anino

    by torontoxic

    The coins and the busts reflect the movements in art of their respective origin. Hence the discrepancy between Egyptian depictions and Macedonian of just about everyone around at that time. Most of the stuff with her likeness was ordered destroyed by Octavian.

  • Dec. 2, 2006, 5:11 p.m. CST

    Soderbergh, Zeta-Jones

    by Thunderbolt Ross

    I read some thing last year that Steven Soderbergh was gonna make a Cleopatra musical with Catherine Zeta-Jones. I smell money!

  • Dec. 2, 2006, 8:46 p.m. CST

    Wow, supermarch

    by Mr. Winston

    Your lack of knowledge on the business side of the film industry is staggering. <br> <br> First of all, as someone pointed out, studios recoup only about 50% of the total domestic box office receipts...meaning that a film has to make double its budget just to break even. Those figures are even lower for foreign markets, though often they can range based on how and by whom the film is released overseas. <br> <br> In that regard, both ALEXANDER and KINGDOM OF HEAVEN were colossal box office bombs, and there's absolutely no other way to say it. Alexander especially performed disgracefully but the studios took a huge hit on both. Even if we assume a 50% take from the foreign box office returns (which they wouldn't get), ALEXANDER lost over $71 million and KoH lost over $49 million. But let's throw out, for a moment, all industry-related economics and pretend the "profit" you claim had actually been "profit". Ponying up $150+ million to make only $56 million would be merely a decent result; putting up $150+ million to make only $12 million is almost a total waste of time. You don't spend $100+ million on ANY movie unless you're expecting (reasonably) to almost double the original investment. It just doesn't make any sense. <br> <br> At the end of the day DVD sales and TV deals can help bring back some of the cash lost, but in the case of these two almost nothing can happen to make them profitable - especially considering that KoH DVD sales were lukewarm at best and no one bought ALEXANDER. Just because you liked them and because the historical epic genre has produced some good (and occasionally profitable) films doesn't change the facts.

  • Dec. 2, 2006, 9:04 p.m. CST

    woweewawa Mr. Winston

    by torontoxic

    I'm amazed that you're able to talk out of your ass with your head so far up there. <P> It's a split. Not 50/50 you dolt. You're knowledge in general is saddening. Putting up 150 mill to make 12 is a waste of time? Are you high? 12 million is a lot of money. Sure to the casual and uninformed observer like you who reads about movie budgets from the comfort of the tub thinks its now cause you hear about 200 mill budgets and 200 mill profits but at the end of the day even 100 bucks earned is 100 bucks earned. 12 million is sweet. <P> DVD sales for a lot of movies dwarf box office and Alexander made a tonne on DVD. Just because you didn't buy it doesn't mean a damn thing. <P> People hear that movies are bombs and just steer into the skid. I bet you think Striptease was a bomb too but it made huge bucks in Europe. <P> "You don't spend $100+ million on ANY movie unless you're expecting (reasonably) to almost double the original investment. It just doesn't make any sense." <P> That's just about the dumbest thing I've ever read on any site. I mean amazingly dumb. But at least I have closure on your level of intellect. If I have any questions about Blues Clues or Playdo I'll give you a ring.

  • Dec. 2, 2006, 10:07 p.m. CST

    Supermarch, hindsight is 20/20

    by glodene

    Trust me on this, if the studio execs knew before hand that their initial investment of $150+ million would only get a return of (only) $12 million, they would've nixed that project in a heartbeat. A $12 million profit does'nt even begin to justify putting up that kind of money when you factor in salaries and overhead. Now if you're talking about something like The Blairwitch Project earning a $12 million dollar profit after an initial investment of $100.000 dollars then yes, but trust me, if the execs who greenlighted KoH & Alexander could've predicted the BO outcome they would've backed off, thus saving them a small fortune in Maalox.

  • Dec. 2, 2006, 11:08 p.m. CST

    blair witch was a 1 million purchase not 100K

    by torontoxic

    World wide gross...$248,639,099. Plus it was a once in a lifetime kind of thing. Marketing genius and good timing. <P> 12 million is a lot of money people.

  • Dec. 3, 2006, 12:30 a.m. CST

    Actually, I was talking about...

    by glodene

    Production cost, which they (the studio) invested to polish up the film. Btw, it's not a once in a lifetime anomaly. My Greek Wedding; The Passion of Christ; Saw 1 & 2; and so on. Those movies went on to garner over 5 to 10 times their production cost. The $12 million you're talking about does'nt cover Colin Farrel's or Angelina Jolie's salaries. Start thinking outside of the trailer park, Supermarch.

  • Dec. 3, 2006, 12:36 a.m. CST

    Blair Witch production cost was 60K

    by torontoxic

    Does your foot taste good or something? <P> Blair Witch was a post purchase. Saw was a financed production as was Greek Wedding. <P> The salaries were covered in budget. <P> Is supermoron a real word or should we contact Websters about you? <P> Now you've named 5 high grossing movies with low budgets in 6 years. Brava you twat. <P> The Passion was even privately financed. <P> Der. <P> I'd say your argument has been squashed...but what argument?

  • Dec. 3, 2006, 1:52 a.m. CST

    Soderbergh?

    by Almost_Human

    I smell jackass.

  • Dec. 3, 2006, 5:02 a.m. CST

    Oh supermarch

    by Mr. Winston

    I mean...this is difficult for me. Because we both know what you're saying is utter bullshit. Even me pointing out, item by item, your errors won't make even a shred of difference on this forum. I know, you don't...just hang on and be English, OK? The douchebaggery suits you.

  • Dec. 3, 2006, 10:37 a.m. CST

    Oh for f's sake

    by torontoxic

    You're trying to be condescending now? <P> I'm done. You weren't worth ripping into in the first place. <P> I kick your fat ass around and you try to elevate yourself with what? Will? <P> Don't bother me again.

  • Dec. 3, 2006, 10:39 a.m. CST

    Oh and PS

    by torontoxic

    If you want to be a total fucking idiotic bigot (Imnea continue being one) and cry that Cleopatra was black you better teach the actress playing her how to pronounce the word 'ask'. Wouldn't look to good to watch her tell someone she axed them a question.

  • Dec. 3, 2006, 11:27 a.m. CST

    supermarch

    by Almost_Human

    roflmao - Good call. SHE WAS GREEK YOU RACIST SHIT HEADS! No supposition, not a guess, a scientific and historical FACT. Get over it and get over yourself. To listen to your interpretation of history, blacks must have invented sunshine. Grow the fuck up.

  • Dec. 3, 2006, 3:11 p.m. CST

    Kenneth Branagh

    by Almost_Human

    Maybe. Do not forget he let Keeanu in on Much Ado About Nothing. And it sssuuuuuccckkkkeddd. However, I find it impossible to watch his version of Henry V and not want to go kill the French.

  • Dec. 4, 2006, 1:02 p.m. CST

    Supermarch

    by glodene

    It must be real comforting to play the alpha-male behind the safety of a keyboard, proclaiming that you kicked someone ass and such. Dispite your earlier post, i find it hard to believe that any large movie studio would invest $100+ million with the expectation of only making a $12 million profit and be happy about it, especially when they have thousands of employees and other overhead concerns that they have to meet on a daily basis. By your rationale, they would be seeking bankruptcy protection...So at the risk of repeating myself: Start thinking outside of the trailer park.

  • Dec. 4, 2006, 2:52 p.m. CST

    I was actually going with Asia Argento based on her

    by superninja

    performance in Marie Antoinette, not your porn fantasies.

  • Dec. 4, 2006, 5:06 p.m. CST

    The Only Way

    by neilmccauley

    Split timeframe and ALLISON JANNEY as cleopatra. somebody needs to understand this.

  • Dec. 4, 2006, 6:13 p.m. CST

    Some historical sources suggest

    by Ingeld

    that Cleopatra had a large goiter problem due to iodine deficiencies. I hope they go with an actress who has a huge swollen neck--or maybe they could do it in post-production with CGI.

  • Dec. 4, 2006, 10:07 p.m. CST

    glodene

    by torontoxic

    You're projecting kiddo. I didn't proclaim, I reviewed and stated a fact. You're biased...I get it. And since I'm white and you disagree I must be in a trailer park. Even though we don't have trailer parks in the city I live in. There might be some in the country, I don't know. I've never seen one. <P> My rationale is that Alexander and Kingdom of Heaven were not flops (which I actually backed up with numbers as opposed to well...you and everyone else who do nothing but squawk) and that they were great movies. Believe it or not (as evidenced by Alexander being privately financed) some people care about the quality of the end product. So any large movie studio might not back something with the guarantee of only a measly 12 mill in profits, but there are no guarantees and I don't think anyone is overly upset ever so long as they actually do make money. <P> So at the end of all this we have you looking like a fucking supersonic douchebag with a severe chip on his slopped shoulders by way of his obvious and laughable racist leanings. <P> I appreciate you taking the risk and repeating yourself, it's just too bad you didn't have a leg to stand on to begin with. <P> And who the fuck still retreats to the "you're tough behind the keyboard"? Are you new to the internet? Gonna throw out that fighting on net retarded line and play it off as your own? <P> I don't need to say I kicked your ass on here (not literally. I feel bad for you that I have to point that out) because it's pretty damn obvious. <P> Night, sweety.

  • Dec. 4, 2006, 10:28 p.m. CST

    Of course, supermarch...

    by Mr. Winston

    Neither of these movies made money. They both lost an incredible amount of money, as I've pointed out. Just because you refuse to believe in the reality of the 50% theater split (which is exactly how studio economics work) doesn't mean it doesn't exist. Your rationale is, in fact, backed up with numbers. It just so happens that those numbers are not only wrong but being applied in a way that would make Chris Burke blush. <br> <br> Now you seem like a last word freak, so I'm going to let you have it. But please use it to show us some data to "prove" your "numbers" or at least give us a blathering treatise on why Santa and the Easter Bunny really do exist despite what our parents have told us.

  • Dec. 4, 2006, 10:39 p.m. CST

    Aw hell, supermarch...

    by Mr. Winston

    I'd actually rather see you try to refute this: <br> <br> http://www.slate.com/id/2133612/ <br> <br> I would ask that you pay special attention to the first part of the third paragraph: <br> <br> "Second, theater chains are in the movie exhibition business. Here they are partners with the studios. Although every deal is different, the theaters and the studios generally wind up splitting the take from the box office roughly 50-50." <br> <br> But please, carry on and tell us all how ALEXANDER - widely considered the biggest commercial flop since WATERWORLD and ISHTAR - and KINGDOM OF HEAVEN made money at the box office. I don't actually think it's possible for you to look like a bigger moron right now, but damned if I don't believe you're scrappy enough to give it your best shot! And just so there's no confusion, in a post above you said... <br> <br> "It's a split. Not 50/50 you dolt." <br> <br> After that you went on to hem and haw about my lack of intellect and then promptly misspelled "Play-Doh".

  • Dec. 5, 2006, 10:31 p.m. CST

    Supermarch, Supermarch

    by glodene

    Do you always have this propensity to rationalize bullshit? The two movies that you're championing tanked! I'm sure that if you were to ask any Studio Exec from either Warners or Fox, they would tell you that if they had to do it again, they would've put those projects in turnaround and moved on to something more financially viable...Btw, I was using "Trailer Park" as a metaphor for small thinking. If you inferred something racist from that, those are bricks that you have to carry.