Massawyrm Reviews APOCALYPTO!!

First!

Looking forward to this film.

first

Hope the movie doesn't.

Very, very nice.

you're the reason I saw Shaggy Dog, so I really can't trust you anymore.

This movie sounds amazing. I can't wait!

Which doesn't stop people from appreciating his work. I don't think Mel Gibson will get a fair shake any time soon. Or maybe he has gotten a fair shake and he actually IS a gigantic douche. In either case, it'll be history that judges him.

I sure hope the movie going public puts their opinions aside- it would suck to see this (a good film) suffer because of a well-publicized blunder. Now bring on a fourth Mad Max!

I'm glad to see you touting the movie and not the man. Good example to be setting. We get so few good flicks these days, I barely care about the lives of the makers unless they factor directly into the pic. Oh, and all the talkback bitches wif dey Massa hating, get some. Your reviews are about the only ones I can wade through anymore, well, yours and Vern's. Vern's a freakin' genius. Anyways, keep up the good work.

Thanks, Massa. Finally, a lifelong Christian is upfront about his love of sodomy...or at least face fucking people with a 12-year-old boys chest

Well, for me, this is a definite movie of the year. Not that I've seen it, but it's the only "studio/big budget" picture (besides maybe - and you may kill me for it - CASINO ROYALE) I've been looking forward to. My favorite film last year was THE PROPOSITION... and I have a feeling this film will give me similar thrills, depicting a violent world where death ain't a Bob Rodriguez gimmick, but a gut wrenching, heart burning, retina tearing atrocity. Respect for Mel Gibson's audacity.

Wyrm, you said what Mel believes only affects you if you ever have any kind of dealings with the guy, which you said you don't. Umm...what do you call paying to see one of his movies? Filmmakers tend to put a bit of theirselves in their movies, especially Mel Gibson as you know, so I don't buy that argument. Anyway I'll probably rent this.

instead of seeing this movie and giving a know right-wing anti-Semitic , Christian nutbag more money, you all could read "Collapse" by Jared Diamond.

dipshits

...to see if the studio ad campaign downplays Mel's involvement as we close in on the release date. Sort of like the ads for Scoop declaring "from the director of Match Point" without ever mentioning Woody Allen's name.

As they say in politics,"The only thing a man can't survive is getting caught with a dead woman or a live boy."

As they say in politics,"The only thing a man can't survive is getting caught with a dead woman or a live boy."

which is sucky.

their "stars." Sure, some slipped through the cracks in the past one-hundred years, but if we knew half of what has gone on in that town, Mel Gibson's arrest would appear quite tame. I like Mel Gibson, and his films. I'm sorry so many people feel the need to apologize for anything positive said about him. We've allowed the media megamonster to turn us all into moronic, spineless cowards, who make simplistic moral judgments in black and white.

I still bet we can expect a bunch of people to go to the movie in order to deeply analyze it for any vague reference to Anti-Semitism. You know this to be true...

I still bet we can expect a bunch of people to go to the movie in order to deeply analyze it for any vague reference to Anti-Semitism. You know this to be true...

The guy knows how to make movies. I'm payin.

Good review, Wormy

Today's review is not so wordy,Wormy.

someone like Roman Polanski who sexually assaults a 13 year old gets treated like a hero in hollywood and wins oscars. Honestly though I've been drunk and said some crazy stuff, I'm sure many of you have been drunk and said stuff you didn't mean, wouldn't normally say, or hell even remember saying in the first place.

I don't understand the inability to distinguish between the art and the artist. If we shunned the work of every asshole or lunatic out there, we'd have very little art to enjoy, and almost zero *good* art. If you don't like Mel's movies, don't watch 'em. If you don't like Mel personally, don't hang out with him. But if you don't watch his movies because you don't like him personally, well, that's just silly.

"The Passion" one of the best movies ever made?!? It's not even in the top ten of movies about Jesus! It boils down his philosophy? How? "Watch me getting tortured?" It's not a bad film by any means, but it basically reduces the life of Christ to a glossy action flick. People only say they like it (or hate it) to "send a message". The film itself is utterly empty, except inasmuch as it references to one of the most powerful (in every sense) schools of thought in human history. I enjoyed Braveheart on the level of a dumb action flick, and if the hype had made it possible, I would have done the same for TPOTC. I'm looking forward to enjoying Apocalypto on the same level. But let's not try to argue that Mel makes "important" films. He's simply a throwback to the days when blockbuster action movies could be unusual and experimental. But that's all they are: blockbuster action films.

Not sure I can trust any review where the reviewer proclaims lifelong Christian status a mere paragraph after speaking of much deserved blowjob. Something not right about it. Should be at least three or four paragraphs later. Or maybe you could put about three or four million ellipses between those two ideas. Thanks. Penway

Bwa haha

Reports are that he was partying like the madman he is while in Texas. I'm not saying that's a bad thing, just like celebrity gossip is all. Did you buy him a bud and contribute to his falling off the wagon?

Wait, since when are Christians not allowed to like Blowjobs?

Throw the Apocalypto downthe well!

I get what you're saying, but I don't agree. You're not paying the studio to hire good people, you're paying the studio to create good movies. And if Mel profits directly on the back end (a likely scenario), you're not paying him to be a good person, you're paying him to make good movies.

was when I asked him a question in the Q&A. And he was Drinking Red Bull at the movie. Outside of that I have no clue.

Has to be the funniest thing I have read in a long time. Great analogy. I think this movie looks great. I do not care what kind of idiot Mel gibson may, or may not, turn out to be. I really enjoyed Mission impossible 3 because i had the ability to see tom cruise as ethan hunt.

I saw a guy get tortured to death with no context to speak of. A film shouldn't have required reading to get it, even if its the Bible. Having said that, I don't think the film was anti-Semetic. As for the director's personal life, any of you guys see either of the Jeepers Creepers films? Then you've supported a convicted pedophile who made a 12 year old boy blow him on camera. That kind of puts Mel's drunken rantings in perspective, I think.

You can't enjoy 'em because you psychos impeached Clinton on that whole "moral highground" bullshit. And yes, I called you a psycho, psycho.

You should turn him on to the Dr. Pepper! ;-)

maybe he's gone a little batty becauses oh, i don't know, his childhood in poland under the nazis and that little incident in 1969 with his pregnant wife? people hello?

Kudos to Gibson for putting money behind films that otherwise would not be made (both Apocalypto and Passion). Too bad they were directed by Mel Gibson. The Passion was melodramatic shite that replaced characterization with gore. Apocalypto is a neat idea, but I never really liked Gibson as a director, even Braveheart was too over-the-top (and historically atrocious). He should become a permanent producer and take risks on more talented director's work.

So don't use the all-encompassing "As Christians" in a review. That said, Gibson's anti-Semitic ass won't see a dime of my money ever again, no matter if his films end up curing cancer. I don't give a shit how great his "art" is -- he's a disgusting human being (for all his vaunted, saintly "Christianity") and I won't support him in any way. Oh, and in the future he might want to remember that Jesus lived and died a Jew. Dickhead.

It was a spurt of the moment too towards this guy who was annoying the hell out of me for a while at the time just for laughs, and I was sputtering around reaching for something to say that would be as insulting as possible. I felt pretty bad immediatedly afterwards, and I was sober... It just happens... Apparently I heard Mel donated a kidney to a rabbi, don't know if the story is true or whatever, just that's what I heard, and this was sometime after the drunk incident. The man's wife apaprently said that Gibson is lucky they didn't demand both his kidneys... So well if this story is so, then that's a hell of a way to make it up, don't you think?

It was just an odd juxtopostion of thoughts, that's all. Imagine cracking open a Mother Teresa biography and the foreward is all about this cool new sport called bumfighting.

...you better watch yourself, Mother Theresa (aka - One Eyd Terri) was the best Bumfighter to ever live, may she rest in piece. ;)

shame *sniff*

You're a fucking idiot. I'll see this twice so you not going means both jack and shit. Sorry about your luck. Mel Gibson is being targeted and everyone sees it so take your agenda and fuck right off. I'm not a Christian. I'm not even baptised. I'm a third party impartial observer who doesn't appreciate people attempting to manipulate him.

...so two people hearing it by Hollywood bias standards makes it a fact. I also read about this one time when he saved a Jewish guy from a raging gang of mid western frat guys on a bus on the highway and it was filmed. They put it in Borat but they edited Mel out with CGI and a droodle.

But I disagree that "Passion" exemplified Christian beliefs and values. It made you feel Christ's pain, not Christ's love, which is the important aspect of the story. I guess you need the pain to show the love, but all Gibson did was focus on the violence, and it became completely meaningless after awhile. That said, Apocalypto looks great and I'll see it. I believe my money supports the art the man is making, not the man's drinking and anti-Jew tendencies.

That would be trippy.

If Hitler made a good movie, I'd watch it. Triumph of the Will was one film I had to see for a film class, and many people consider it a fine example of propagand, I didn't like it but I watched it. I personally don't care what Lnni Riefenstahl's politcal/religious/sexual views are to her personally, I only cared about how she set-up shots. It's like nowdays no-one gives a shit about Walt Disney's antisemetic views, but almost everyone went out and saw Pirates 2.

his movies. Many said that The Passion was anti-semetic, and that seems like an incredibly apt assessment given Gibson's tirade. If his films had nothing to do with his personal life, and vice-versa, then no problem. However, since his personal life has seeped into his films, then it's legitimate to bring it up.

I was skipping ahead to see if you have a new avatar yet. And the chances of him having a beer with you are even slimmer now that he's in rehab...

A trilogy would be awesome

Hitchock could be a son of a bitch, also. After Kim Novak initially refused to wear grey, he made sure all her costumes were ridiculously and painfully tight. That being said, I think Mel is an idiot, but isn't going to keep me from watching this film. It will be a entertaining costume drama (sans clothes?) at the least.

That was another great review and has only made me more excited to see this film - if that were possible. It's definitely on my must-see list and I don't think I will be disappointed. This and "The Departed" has me cheering!! :)

Masswyrm praised "The Passion". How anyone could praise that historically inaccurate, guilt ridden, piece of horse shit propaganda is beyond me. I will admit though that I am interested in this film though. Even if Mel Gibson is completely out of his mind (South Park's "The Passion of the Jew" most accurately portrays this looney toon IMHO).

Yay, cinematography.

but I feel a great swell of pity for any Christian that was "moved" by Passion of the Christ. I also fail to see the need to even mention it in this review, Massa. I feel bad that it moved you, though. Consider yourself conned. The Passion was unquestionably a cash cow. While filmed well it holds on very loosley to what the Bible states. Good old Mel exploiting his own religion. Hell, the guy's a brilliant businessman I'll give him that much. And, Massa... I'm never all too fond of your reviews, but you should look into writing. Seriously dude. If you can write a novel for each review imagine what you could do with a creative idea. Think about, good sir.

AHAHAHAHAH! All Right I admit it, I'm going to see this movie. It actually looks good.

bwaahhhaaaahhaaa

I don't think you know the meaning of that expression. He was not a mean bastard by all accounts. Whom exactly described him as a douchebag? Hell, even Fritz Lang had people who thought well of him. Leave ol' hamster cheeks alone, alright? Oh, and and artist should not be judged by what he /she does in her personal life. If so, we would not have most of the art around us (not that it would matter to most of the country).

Well a 'Fuck you' to you too sir. It's a story I heard from somewhere and I want to know, is it true? Didn't I state I wasn't sure? I'd like to know... Now in plain words, tell me that he story is a hoax, it's not hard!Inform me...

I have seen the movie. It was filmed well, as I had stated previously. But it is what it is... exploitation. As far as an "uninformed, agenda-filled attack on Mel". You'll find that I don not speak when I am "uninformed". And despite my opinion on Passion and Mr. Gibson's recent behavior... I will see Apocolypto. I really could care less how a director lives their personal or about their personal opinions for that matter. And it's good to know that a person such as youself starts making accusations of someone's "honest opinion" just because they do not agree with them. I do hereby apologize, SexyBack, for thinking differently than you. But I cannot promise that it won't happen again. You know... it's so odd to me that when people critisize Passion they always have to be anti-Christian, etc. Like people have no choice but to like it. Well people do have that choice, and I do not like it. Call we what you will, but it will then be yourself who is making the "uninformed, agenda-filled attacks"

I kinda skipped that site on the google search because it was called 'Conspiracy Planet' and people tend not to count some of those as reliable. Other sites didn't indicate it clearly as humor. So again, thanks and STFU, with all due respect...

You'll have to excuse them, they're used to speaking/typing in authentic Mayan Yucatan

Not really. Honestly, I don't get some of you fanboys. These talkbacks thrive on sexist comments and all kinds of gay double entendre, but Mel's "anti-Semitism" is where you draw the line: strap him on an ass and drive him into the desert, why don't cha? Keep your 8 bucks, fine, but bend over and smile as you send your tax money to the UN, the planet's fucking Anti-Semite University. Iran's president is developing nukes to erase Israel, but that's cool, 'cause he hates Bush. Just about all of Europe is anti-Semitic and proud of it, at least according to the polls. But Mel's transgression cannot be forgiven. Is it because he made a movie that appealed to evangelicals? Is that what pissed you off? But then he slagged Bush... oh, what to do? Look, I think what he said was stupid, but damn... why does Mel (who did apologize) alone have to take the brunt of your righteous fury? Spread it around, folks. There's plenty of real live armed-and-dangerous anti-Semitism out there that could use your attention. If you actually cared.

Is there any great living genius's you lot don't hate? ...or any shitty tabloid you won't believe for that matter? I think you only like Crowe because he beats people up with phones! ...yeah me too

I was drunk when I wrote it. Seriously, I thought I overdid it. But now I just read the post immediately below it, and damn. If you see Mel's new movie, you're contributing to the next Holocaust. I'd like to order the super-sized motherfucking break with a side order of what the fuck planet is this? Islamists, not the greatest friend of the Jews by the way, knock down the Twin Towers, but Bushitler let it happen 'cause he's worse than Hitler and only cares about oil (at least I think that's Danny Glover's new line, when he's sober). That behavior can be explained away and the blame pointed as us. But Mel... now THAT's going too far. I absolutely do not understand why so many are drawing the line here. Except that's it's a really easy place to draw the line and sound compassionate without having to deal with the actual issues in the world outside the movie theater. Don't buy a movie ticket...big fucking sacrifice there. Let me engrave your name in the "I didn't buy a ticket to Apocalypto" memorial.

Credit where credit is due anchorite... Oh, btw have you seen or heard from Doc Pazuzu? Did he get banned or is he 'away'?

Can't wait to see it!

Not giving a shit about Mel Gibson's personal life has nothing to do with condoning the Holocaust. Achorite you are blowing things out of proportion as usual... but it is always a bit refeshing to read you propaganda... one of these days you'll get it right... you're getting closer each post. Keep it up. :)

Good job completely twisting my words to suit you equally twisted assumptions. So let me ask you this... if I don't give a shit about apples... does that mean that I hate oranges? Apparently by your logic it does. Congratulations on the not-so-clever attempt at polictial spin. Study George Bush more than you already probably do and perhaps one day in the far future you'll perfect it. I'm afraid you're goining to have to find something far more sensical to consume then regurgitate in this forum for me to take any stock in it.

REGARDLESS of someone's feelings pertaining to Mel Gibson as a person. You could in no way logically determine said individuals feelings toward Jews or the Holocaust. Prove me wrong.

is a close-up of the main character wiping his ass with a leaf. that's right. you were all thinking it. i said it.

I've loved everything Mel's done so far so I'm excited for this!

I'm responsible for the next Holocaust? Man, and here my mom always said I wouldn't amount to nothin'.

How come I missed this page? AICN front page moves wayyy too fast. I just saw this posted on another board today! Anyway, I loved the trailer so this seems coolness!

If someone says some drunken words to someone else while being arrested that happen to be offensive, we have no choice but to destroy that person in every and any way possible. If you don't, then you might as well be commiting genocide. This is clearly true in this case because you see, Mel Gibson is in exactly the same sort of position that Hitler was in. He has an entire nations military might under his control. It's the same thing people! 'Guy who said something near a car' = Hitler. If you don't really really care deep down what 'guy who said something' said, then you are blindly heading down the path to another Holocaust. You have a duty to do something about it.... I'm not sure what you could do besides make rediculous comparisons on movie talkbacks but damnit that is something!! Of course, like Anchorite, I am free of all flaws and enjoy the view from atop my high horse.

If someone says some drunken words to someone else while being arrested that happen to be offensive, we have no choice but to destroy that person in every and any way possible. If you don't, then you might as well be commiting genocide. This is clearly true in this case because you see, Mel Gibson is in exactly the same sort of position that Hitler was in. He has an entire nations military might under his control. It's the same thing people! 'Guy who said something near a car' = Hitler. If you don't really really care deep down what 'guy who said something' said, then you are blindly heading down the path to another Holocaust. You have a duty to do something about it.... I'm not sure what you could do besides make rediculous comparisons on movie talkbacks but damnit that is something!! Of course, like Anchorite, I am free of all flaws and enjoy the view from atop my high horse.

Dude, that is one slippery slope you are standing on. By taking my words as absolutes and adding extra meaning to them has forced you to slide so far down the slope that it's not even funny. Comparing someone's 'beliefs' to their 'actions' is a big leap in logic. If Mel were out their killing people in line with what he said, you'd probably hear a completely different tune from me. If Mel's movie were about the beliefs people are claiming he holds, then you'd hear a very different tune out of me. But What you're comparing is what a drunk guy said to a pair of cops on an abandoned road to the extermination of millions of people. And there's at the very least a couple dozen degrees of seperation from those two ideas. You're argument is not only deliberately insulting to me and to Gibson, but inadvertantly offensive to the millions who died in the Holocaust as you use their deaths as a rationale to insult someone you just don't like. My argument was entirely about the appreciation of art - not about the allowance of Genocide, and I think it's about time you step back, take a look at the argument and realize just how far off the ledge you are there Wile E. Coyote.

Well said Massawyrm. And since Rick Santorum did it.. I'm gonna make up my own terminology for somone and call anchorite a Hebrew-fascist. Keep spinning anchorite... are you feeling dizzy yet?

...have had our differences regarding Leni Riefenstahl, I have to side with him on this matter. I don't deny that anchorite has a point, since the Nazi holocaust, Serbia's ethnic cleansing and the Rwandan genocide didn't materialize in a cultural vacuum, but he (once again) shoots himself in the foot by virtually eliminating all the steps required to complete the bridge between growing ethnic slander in everyday culture and full on mass murder. Yes, these atrocities could be said to have had their starting point in a gradual acceptance in culture of prejudice, but that doesn't mean that increased prejudice automatically results in the death of millions. Anchorite had the chance to make a solid, valid point here but chose to go the alarmist route and turn the matter into what sounds like a social or behavioral law of sorts. Does this mean we should tolerate shit like the things Mel "white line nightmare" Gibson said? No, of course not. If you wouldn't accept hearing shit like that about Jews, blacks, Muslims, Koreans, Gypsies, Innuits or anyone else from Joe Blow down the street, then special exceptions shouldn't be made for celebs. But anchorite, you're not doing anyone any favors by reducing the harm Gibbo's statements may have caused to the equivalent of Insta-Extermo (just add liqour). In fact, thanks to your reasoning alone, any real points about the harm he may have caused can't be brought up in this talkback anymore -- not that a talkback is important, but the discussions here often mirror public discourse on a larger scale. And to all you dopes who say "c'mon, who hasn't said racist things when they're drunk?": fuck off. I've been totally shitfaced more times than I care to remember over the years -- and I mean completely fucked up -- done incredibly stupid shit, spent hours with my head over a toilet bowl and temporarily lost the ability to walk and talk a few times, but I have never in my life ever said anything even vaguely racist or prejudiced while intoxicated. Anyone who HAS said things like that while drunk has real issues with the matter even if they choose not to believe it while sober.