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Enjoys Sunday’s 90-Minute AMAZING RACE Premiere!!

I am – Hercules!! Need a reason to check in on Sunday’s season premiere of “The Amazing Race”? One of the contestants has a robot leg (!), and a lot of interesting stuff happens to her and that leg within the first episode. The typically compelling first episode starts everybody’s journey in rainy Seattle, where a bigrig crash makes the first leg of the race a misery. But before Phil yells “go!” he advises contestants that there will be surprises this season they’ll “never expect.” Indeed, at least one major surprise that will change the complexion of the race surfaces in the very first episode. Those concerned with racial sensitivities should be warned that while “Survivor” only featured four racially pure teams, “The Amazing Race” features no fewer than 12!! The contestants: * “Peter & Sarah, newly dating triathletes from Southern California.” Both are cute and blonde. Sarah, 31, a motivational speaker, has an amazing robot leg where her real one should be. Peter, 35, builds artificial legs for a living, which really gets Sarah hot! Get this: though Sarah is a triathlete, her missing limb allows her to pre-board flights! (The single-mother team takes much umbrudge!) * “Bilal & Sa’eed, best friends from Cleveland, Ohio.” Both are heavyset thirtysomething African-American Muslims with a most impressive quantity of facial hair. They say stuff like “Allah is the greatest!” and “I’m from Cleveland Ohio! What do I know about chopsticks!” For hefty men, they move quickly! Though not as into Jesus as most Americans, they intend to stop and pray plenty along the way. * “Rob and Kimberly, dating, from Los Angeles.” Kimberly, 28, is a piping-hot public relations girl. Rob is a surly 31-year-old bartender. * “Dustin & Kandice, beauty queens from New York City.” Hot blondes both, they met while rooming together as Miss America contestants. Dustin, 26 and a marketing exec, was Miss California. Kandice, 24 and a Rockette, was Miss New York. * “David & Mary, married, coal miner and housewife from Stone, Kentucky.” Tubby hillbillies in their early thirties! David’s a mouthbreather. Mary, who sounds exactly like Dolly Parton, confides they’ve never been beyond Tennessee. * “Erwin & Godwin, brothers from the San Franciso Bay area.” Korean-American eggheads! Godwin, 29, is a financial analyst. Erwin, 32, is an insurance company manager. * “Duke & Lauren, father and daughter from Long Island.” Lauren, 26, is a supercute speech and language pathologist. Duke, 52, is a tour-company owner who cries like a little bitch because Lauren has taken to sleeping with a woman. * “Vipul & Arti, husband and wife from Orlando, Florida.” The show’s first Indian-American team. Arti, female and 27, is a nutritional educator; Vipul, male and 29, is in sales. They’ve been married two years. He introduces himself as “Vipul of the People.” She’s way too hot for him. * “Kellie & Jamie, best friends and cheerleaders from Columbia, South Carolina.” One just graduated college; the other studies broadcast journalism. Both are extra-pretty, 22 and unafraid to strip down to their minis and cartwheel! * “Tyler and James, recovering drug addicts and models from Hollywood, California.” They appear to maintain a collection of pouty polaroids from their days as substance abusers. It’s impossible to look at them and not whisper “Zoolander.” * “Lyn & Karlyn, lifelong friends and single mothers from Birmingham, Alabama.” Both are black, 32 and have “lyn” in their names. Lyn teaches 4th grade; Karlyn is a program analyst. Again, they do not cotton to that pretty little one-legged white girl! * “Tom & Terry, boyfriends from New York City.” Balding white men who take manicures together. Tom, 39, is a college admissions director. Terry, 45, is a special events director. As with all of “Amazing Race’s” homosexuals, they are never depicted kissing each other, even when they discover they’ve survive an eliminations. Learn what all the amazing racers look like here. 8:30 p.m. Sunday. CBS.

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