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MiraJeff Moves Into MONSTER HOUSE!!
Greetings AICN, MiraJeff here reporting live from Nebbercracker’s front lawn.
That’s right, I’m not scared anymore. Because initially, I kind of was. Honestly, I had no idea what to expect from Monster House. Walking up to the majestic doors of Graumann’s Chinese Theatre, all I knew about the film was that it was about a house that eats people, and Harry friggin’ loved it. And though I fully trust Harry’s opinion, like Jenna Jameson, I’d seen him gush before. So at first I thought it was a bold move to pronounce Monster House as AICN’s 10th Anniversary “Movie,” but now, after seeing it in gorgeous 3-D, I’ve realized that not only was it a smart move, it was the only move.
If Harry’s review was a dart, it would be stuck in the dead center of the dartboard. When the lights went down after Moriarty’s passionate introduction and the Amblin Entertainment logo graced the screen, the clapping began. 91 minutes later, it continued. And in between was the closest thing to The Goonies I think I’ve ever seen, and I mean that in the best way possible.
I knew Monster House would exceed all expectations as soon as the larger-than-life title ballooned from the screen as ominous music filled the darkened theater. There have been so many reviews here on the site I’m not going to bore anyone with a plot synopsis, I just felled compelled to echo everyone else’s sentiments. This is one of those films that reminds you what it’s like to be a kid again. It’s children’s entertainment for adults.
Parents take note, you might not want to bring the little ones to this movie. There were some genuinely scary parts that might keep your kids up all night, peering through their bedroom window blinds at the house across the street. That’s because the movie, as inherently unrealistic as it looks since it is animated, feels frighteningly realistic. Every neighborhood has that crazy old guy who likes his lawn a little too much. Every kid has a friend like Chowder (Sam Lerner) and every boy has a crush like Jenny (Spencer Locke). And every kid thinks of himself as and will be able to identify with D.J (Mitchel Musso). Musso carries the pictures as its fearless teenage hero who seems to actually mature onscreen in just an hour and a half. In fact, the entire voice cast is impressive from top to bottom, and everyone does amazing work, especially Chowder, the sidekick character who steals every scene he’s in.
Lerner and Chowder’s team of animators give every line and every reaction shot serious comic weight. Besides him, we get hilarious supporting turns from Jon Heder and Jason Lee as Skull and Bones, respectively. Kevin James and Nick Cannon are both great as a pair of bumbling local cops. Fred Willard, Catherine O’Hara, and Maggie Gyllenhaal also make the most of their small roles. But the heart and soul of this pictures lies with Steve Buscemi’s character, the mean old man across the street named Nebbercracker. Buscemi has one of the best, most threatening voices in showbiz and he makes the character his own just as much as Andy Serkis is Gollum or Kong.
For Zemeckis, this is a huge step forward after Polar Express, which I still saw twice in the theater, both times in IMAX 3-D. The CGI-animation feels much more natural and looks great in 3-D, even better than Superman Returns, which I regret seeing in 3-D because the ridiculously oversized yellow glasses made the screen look too dark during the plane sequence. As long as everyone gets the same black glasses I got at the AICN screening there shouldn’t be a problem. The colors of the film seem to leap off the screen, which itself appears to be pulsating with life at times, along with the titular house. For Spielberg, this is a return to form.
Not that he ever lost “it” to begin with, but Monster House captures the incredible adventure that is childhood with such whimsy and magic that it evokes the spirit of his earlier films like E.T. and Jurassic Park. Monster House is just proof that these two super-directors make quite a producing pair as well. And whoever found matched director Gil Kenan and this script certainly has knows what they’re doing. Whoever that was, they’re the producing equivalent of the guy who first spotted LeBron James shooting hoops in the gym. Give him a medal or a promotion or both.
Speaking of producers, Ron Howard’s gotta be kicking himself considering Monster House is essentially The Burbs for kids. One of like two movies that Tom Hanks ever made that didn’t make $100 million, The Burbs is one of my all-time favorite guilty pleasures, so it was with geek glee that I watched Monster House and thought of the Joe Dante-directed USA Network-staple. There will also be inevitable Goonies comparisons and all I have to say about the matter is that I am a HUGE Goonies fan and Monster House has the same sense of adventure and comic sensibilities.
I’m starting to feel like my favorite fruit snack, Gushers, so I’ll just implore you, the people, to see Monster House in glorious 3-D. I know it’s a crowded weekend at the box office. I myself will be checking out Mooby’s and Narf-nia or whatever I’m reading about these days on AICN, so I’ll understand if Monster House doesn’t rake in the dough this weekend like the fun but inferior Cars. But trust me, word of mouth will spread like the legs this film will have. Parents who had to sit through Pirates of the Whocares will be treating their kids and themselves to one of the best movies of the summer, let alone the year.
That’ll do it for me, folks. I’ll be back with the same reviews I’ve been promising for weeks now, and a couple more for good measure. If you produce Good Morning America and you’re looking for a new film critic for some reason, or you’re just a loyal AICN reader who wants to say hello or drop a few f-bombs, email me at my NEW address, mirajeff@aintitcool.com.
‘Til next time, this is MiraJeff signing off…
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Really, how old were all of you when you first saw the Goonies? Because I was really disappointed watching it as a 14 year old in the theaters. The kids were completely obnoxious and unlikeable, except Mikey. I'm hoping Monster House is better than the Goonies. Did they leave in all the profanity that we heard about earlier?
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It's hillarious and one of the reasons, why I love Joe Dante so much! If you want me to watch a movie, compare it to The Burbs. Well done!
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The Imax theater where I saw SR had black glasses, but I still wasn't too thrilled with the 3-D sequences because they obviously weren't intended to "look" like traditional 3-D, and it was a pain being distracted by the thought of having to put on and take off those glasses every 30 minutes. However, before the movie started, they showed 3-D trailers for that new thing with Ashton whatshisface as a goat, and THE ANT BULLY, and they looked great.
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Was fun.. I think.. But the commodore64 game was Great! Best twoplayer/single screen game of all time.. or top5 atleast..
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...unlike a few other folks on this site who tend to burn 3,000 words before getting to the review, he gets to the point without expanding on every aspect of his life - you know, the shit none of us care about. I swear, Harry, McWeenie, et al MUST get paid by the word.
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I know that's a horrible pun...but I saw it a couple of nights ago and agree. It's a pretty fun flick and the animation isn't quite as "Land of the Living Dead" zombie-like as it was in "Polar Express." All in all, a good time.
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in the cinema. I finally caught it about 4 years later on TV. I think she thought it was about something else... :-(
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however seeing Monster House in 3D is fantastic......check out our review plus all out Comic-Con coverage @ http://www.movietack.net
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Happy Feet looks stupid.
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...im going to check it out in a couple of hourse...not in 3D though. See...THIS is AICN everyone...i would have never touched this movie if it werent for all the talk its getting here...thanks...obviously I would have missed something great
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Sure, it was OK, but that's about it. Not really funny, not that exciting. Way too gimmicky and contrived, seemed like the adults who made it were trying way too hard to capture the feel of kids but were totally out of touch. Reminded me of movies where the kids all talk in slang that only a clueless adult would write. And I was a kid when I saw it and still thought it was dumb. Hate to say it, but the best kid's movies are movies intended for adults that kids happen to love. Seriously, I was supposed to get jazzed about goonies after watching Raiders?
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I just saw this movie and the animation is so fucking horrible that it makes it almost unwatchable. It makes the characters so freaky and unappealing that it detracts from anything good that may be going on. You have as many animators working on this film as a regular animation studio for Gods sake, just animate the damn thing. I give it 2 stars for being just an OK movie, buty I give it negative Eleven-dee-billion stars for horrible characters and even worse animation.
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Uncanny Valley Theory.
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...with some evidence to back it up. ;)
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how many records did that fucker break? is still breaking? id say quite a few people seem care, to some extent obviously...
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...is teh ghey. Yes, we've all read Roger Ebert, and we ALL know what the fucking Uncanny Valley is. That term jumped the shark almost as fast as "jump the shark." And "teh." And "ghey."
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it wasn't Ebert who coined the term and I've never read him mentioning it. Apparently, you have read his thought on it.
THAT is ghey. -
9 out of ten people living in uncanny valley agree!
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... we like this MiraJeff kid, too.
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Go back to J and SB Strike Back's ending, and you'll see where the money came from.
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Not quite great, though it was a bit scarier than I expected. It's like a good funhouse ride, full of thrills while you're there but doesn't stick with you once you're finished. A number of kids started crying and left early with their parents. I loved the Digital 3D, which definitely has potential.
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