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AICN COMICS REVIEWS UNCANNY X-MEN! TEEN TITANS! BIG EYES FOR THE CAPE GUY! AND MUCH, MUCH MORE!!!
#10 | 7/6/06 | align=right> #5 |
(Click title to go directly to the review)
UNCANNY X-MEN #475
JONAH HEX #9
INVINCIBLE #33
52 WEEK NINE
YOUNG AVENGERS #12
THE ALL NEW ATOM #1
SIDEKICK #1
TEEN TITANS #37
THE THING #8
O.C.T. #1
Comics Catch-up: JSA #82-87
Big Eyes From the Cape Guy presents
FOOL'S GOLD V.1
Big Eyes From the Cape Guy presents
QWAN V. 2 & 3
Big Eyes From the Cape Guy presents
OLD BOY V.1
Indie Jones presents…
CHEAP SHOTS!
UNCANNY X-MEN #475
Writer: Ed Brubaker
Artist: Billy Tan
Publisher: Marvel Comics
Reviewed by Dave Farabee
By all rights, I shouldn’t have liked this issue.
Ed Brubaker’s drift from crime comics to superhero stalwart for Marvel has left me wringing my hands, even as I’ve been forced to admit he always brings the craft. What’s more, his recent X-MEN: DEADLY GENESIS set the stage for his UNCANNY run, and DEADLY GENESIS revisited bad ideas ranging from the “third Summers brother” to Professor X as asshole to the classic “let’s kill a team member for shock value!”. Then there’s artist Billy Tan, straight from the land of Top Cow. Unclean! And how can you have a workable X-Men team with Polaris, Rachel Summers, and Havok onboard? Aren’t they non-characters most of the time?
So, yeah, I kinda dug it.
Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck.
Let me start by saying that one of the things that got the issue off on the right foot for me was that, while there were plenty of references to stories I’d never read, it was still an easy thing to fall into. In Egypt, Polaris is alone and on the run from a hit squad backed by a big ol’ mecha-lookin’ thing. Brubaker gets his Claremont on with captions like, “Lorna Dane, also known as Polaris…running, not for fear of her life…but for fear of what it’s become.” And during the course of the story, I find out Apocalypse did something or another to her recently, but the specifics weren’t important. It was enough to know her powers were a little wonky and she was on the run.
Same goes for Rachel Summers. Never knew much about the character other than the fact she was Cyclops’ and Jean’s daughter from the “Days of Future Past” future, but apparently the Shi’ar recently effed with her. News to me, but easy to roll with. Rachel still seems to be mostly the same character she was last I saw her in the 80s (Shit. I’m old.), albeit a little less angsty, a little more upbeat.
It’s a good case for the “illusion of change” school of superhero writing. You take readers through dramatic ups and downs, highly suggestive of the changes you get outside of serial fiction, but ultimately you keep ‘em recognizable--and so comfortable for the longtime reader to return to.
Even the revelation of Xavier’s “dark secret” from DEADLY GENESIS isn’t necessary for the reader to be familiar with. I read that mini, but if I hadn’t, I’d still get the key information that Xavier was on the outs with Cyclops and that there was a lot of tension at the X-Mansion. We’ve seen similar arcs, and that’s not a bad thing as long as a good story stems from it.
The meat of the issue is a quiet but very enjoyable rallying of the troops by Xavier. Many an X-writer comes in ready to shake things up and create a DIRECTION (sound the trumpets!), but Brubaker’s story flows organically. Xavier approaches a number of X-Men with the intent of mending fences and surreptitiously planning a mission, and these scenes convey a pleasant warmth of friendship even as they provide the necessary exposition on recent events. In short, Xavier wants to take responsibility for Vulcan (the “third Summers brother”), and he’s going to need a team to do it. His choices this go-round:
Nightcrawler – Always a favorite, and I love when he puts aside his issues with Xavier, throws him a grin, and asks, “So what fire are we jumping into next, then?”
Havok – Seems to be the surrogate Cyclops, and given how shoddily Cyclops has been written over the last 20 years, he might just end up outdoing his bro.
Warpath – Thunderbird’s younger brother still has issues, and Brubaker reminds us that he once tried to kill Xavier himself, but there’s a nuance to his exchanges that suggests he’s moving past the old days of just being the “pissed off Indian.” Still, he’s the group’s tough guy and scrapper, and I like his new vibranium fighting knives.
Polaris – A bit of a cipher at this point, and generically beautiful, I think she’ll be the toughest character for Brubaker to energize. A tragic past is just too common with the X-Men to be a mark of distinction.
Rachel Summers – If Havok is filling the Cyclops role, Rachel’s definitely filling the role of her mother. I like the pixie-ish enthusiasm artist Billy Tan gives her visually.
Speaking of Tan, to my surprise he impressed me here. Like David Finch (NEW AVENGERS), he’s an artist borne of the Jim Lee 90s, but who appears to have evolved into something more interesting. Actually, I’d take either Finch or Tan over Jim Lee, but that’s a debate for another time. Tan’s biggest issue is a certain similar, pinched quality to his faces. His action’s quite good, though, and backed by the slick computer colors of Frank D’Armata, his costumed X-Men have an appealing energy to them. I can work with this.
As for the writing, it’s interesting – Brubaker really is penning the kind of story I wish Chris Claremont had evolved to be able to create. It “feels” very Claremont with its mixture of action, angst, and tenderness, but modern too, and devoid of the Claremontisms that now overshadow the qualities of Chris’s work. Is it what I’d call a righteous application of Brubaker’s talents? I may be past the point of angsting over such stuff. Brubaker’s got a straight crime book coming soon from Marvel, and anyway, this old school X-fan is willing to admit Marvel’s mutants still offer a special appeal when done right.
Brubaker…he’s doing ‘em right.
And he’s sending his team of X-Men into space for the next year’s worth of stories, so if I don’t like what’s going on in the other X-books or with the whole CIVIL WAR thing (a very safe call), UNCANNY should be protected by its exotic locale. And space for the X-Men means the Shi’ar – cool. And the Starjammers – cool. Hell, I even just realized we’ll have an X-book with no Wolverine for a year – fucking cool.
So alright, dammit, it looks like I’ll be seeing the ex again. A trial thing, mind - no expectations, no commitments. But she’s lookin’ pretty hot.
JONAH HEX #9
Writers: Justin Gray & Jimmy Palmiotti
Artist: Tony DeZuniga
Publisher: DC Comics
Reviewer: Prof. Challenger
Since I've been pretty hard on DC for awhile coming off INFINITE CRAPFEST, I think it's only fair to shout it from the rooftops when DC gets it right. From that dramatic black and white cover with spot red color to the last panel, this was as good as it gets. When the nominations go up this year for 2006, JONAH HEX #9 gets a nomination from me for Best Single Issue Story.
It's a ghost story. But it's also pure Jonah Hex, which means it is brutal, shocking, moral and moving. I dare say that this series is one of those rare occasions where the current writers are doing Hex better than his original writers. This story picks up with Hex having just been ambushed by Apaches and he's about as close to death as you can get without disappearing on into the white light. Alongside Hex is a little girl he calls Adeline who helps him pull out the arrows and bandage himself up as best he can. Then the two of them ride away to the first home they find, an Indian medicine man. Before Hex passes out, he mutters to the armed shaman "Shoot me if ya like…but give the child some…water."
Only the shaman notices there is no child.
While the old medicine man works his magic healing, Hex dreams back to that time in the past when he first met Adeline and her mother. Events get out of hand like they do so often when bounty hunter, Jonah Hex rides into town and Adeline winds up dead and her mother blames Hex. The story plays out in a tale about what grief and a need for revenge will do to someone's soul. The story also offers us a glimpse of the heart that's buried beneath Hex's viciously scarred face.
I actually felt an emotional twinge as I read this story and even when I reread it. Artistically, has there ever been an artist more suited for Jonah Hex than Tony DeZuniga? I believe he was the primary artist on most of the original JONAH HEX comics back in the 70s. Back then, there was more of a company-style polish to his work. But the grit and raw energy he brings to Hex today far surpasses his work from back then. I don't know if he's the new regular illustrator for JONAH HEX, but I hope he is. Luke Ross was a fantastic choice to get this series restarted, but as good as he is, I felt his art was almost too…pretty…for Jonah Hex. It would sometimes sanitize the darkness of the writing, whereas DeZuniga embraces the darkness and gives us a harsher and more believable world for Hex to ride around in. Oh yeah, and that cover by DeZuniga is powerful stuff. I can't believe that wouldn't get the attention of the casual shelf surfer out there. Perfect creative choice to go with DeZuniga's black and white art except for the bloody swing of Hex's sword which is quite red. A striking design and damn good comic.
INVINCIBLE #33
Writer: Robert Kirkman
Penciler: Ryan Ottley
Publisher: Image Comics
Reviewed by Humphrey Lee
There's a reason why I enjoy superhero comics like MANHUNTER, and RUNAWAYS, and even INVINCIBLE here to the more upper-tier character books like whatever Super, Bat, or Spider-Man titles you normally find on the shelves, and issues like this particular one of INVINCIBLE sum it up perfectly. No, I'm not trying to make this some sort of elitist manifesto against mainstream superheroics. I have several Batman statues and a rather large hunk of Spider-Man back issues that prove I dig my franchise characters too. But there's a big difference in the inherent entertainment I draw out of an issue of INVINCIBLE or any of the titles I mentioned above compared to the guys who dominate the top 20 spots of the monthly sales charts. What is this difference?
It's because pertinent events with actual ramifications actually happen to the characters in these kinds of books. There's no status quo to be upheld, there's no "passing on of the torch" so the writers don't have to keep the book accessible to the guy following their run. They just get to take their characters and write the stories they want for them and progress them like they naturally should. And that's exactly what INVINICIBLE 33 does and does spectacularly.
Just after returning from a rather abrupt reunion with his father in space, Mark Grayson now finds him facing down the rather insidious revenge of Angstrom Levy, a man who was deformed in the chaos of one of Mark's past battles. Angstrom has it in bad for Mark and isn't afraid to use anything and everything he can to get to him, including his mother and newly found half-brother. As seen in the pages of MARVEL TEAM-UP this past winter, Angstrom's main plan is to use his dimension jumping abilities to run Mark through a gauntlet of dangerous and foreign environments to slowly wear Mark down before killing him in front of the very family he's panickedly fighting so hard to get back to. But Mark is a little more resilient than Angstrom thought, and when things get out of hand, they really get out of hand. And now Mark is way over his head yet again.
INVINCIBLE is always a treat whenever it comes out, and this issue is not only no different, but sets a pretty high bar for future issues of the title to compete with, which is something given the high quality standard each issue usually achieves. You really just never know what kind of obstacles or revelations Kirkman is going to put our hero through in this title, whether it's more down to earth subject matter like situations with school or his girlfriend, or the usual superhero fanfare like having to deal with an alien invasion or super-powered despots. No matter what it is it all comes smoothly and rarely feels forced (the matter of his half-brother being one of the few exceptions IMO) and you just legitimately don't know sometimes how Mark is going to react to it. Just like in our own lives, you never know how you're going to deal with certain circumstances when they come up. We all know that chances are Batman is going to have some random contingency plan, or Superman is just going to super-strength his way out of whatever comes his way, and that there's certain lines they're not going to or aren't allowed to cross. I can't tell you how Mark is going to react to the new dilemma he's been put in, but I can tell you I can't wait to see it unfold.
52 WEEK 9
Writers: Johns, Morrison, Rucka, Waid, and probably some Giffen
History of DCU Writers: Jurgens and Rapmund
Pencils: Shawn Moll
Inks: Tom Nguyen
Publisher: DC Comics
Reviewer: Squashua
What do you call an Adam Strange with no eyes?
No eye Adam Strange.
Meh. The joke works better with "deer".
Remember last time when I jokingly commented about a cover spoiling the contents of the book? That's not the case this week. Nope. In fact, we're given a cover of Devilance chasing down the space-bound heroes. And what's inside?
Half a comic's worth of Steel and Natasha Irons duking it out. Right down to the page that has the staples in it.
My S.O. watches soap operas. For the last few months of her favorite soap, there's been some mean guy buried alive in a park. We figure that either he'll eventually make his way out and become a "better person", or he'll die and get written out and the producers will stop paying the actor. She fast forwards through those scenes. I don't blame her.
I'd like to fast forward through the Steel / Natasha scenes.
But I won't. That's what I'm here for, I'll take the punishment so you don't have to. I'll review. Anything. For you. Mmm, baby. Yeah. I'll review it. No matter how much it hurts. Uh huh. Slap it. Yeah. You like that, hmm? Oh yeah. I'll review it hard for you. Mmm.
To summarize these scenes, we've got Steel and Natasha and Lex Luthor and a whole purple/green Lex Luthor homage thing going here in a very rushed-feeling half-comic. And that's not the fast-forwarding talking. It's your typical, "I'm rebelling but maybe I'm mind controlled, and maybe your opinion is the wrong one," fight scene. The art seems repetitive, with multiple brick wall backgrounds, and there is something seriously wrong with the way Natasha's head is drawn. Her face, her positioning, it's all off-kilter. Like the way the majority of those Justice League: Elite characters were drawn. It's as though someone said, "Set her body facing right, but turn her head 160 degrees to the right. And jockey that chin." Not my cup of tea.
Of course, I'm not just a reviewer, I'm a conspiracy theorist following the bigger picture of this 52 business (Egg-Fu for the win!) and I'm paying attention to these derivative scenes so you don't have to. Mmm. Me reviewy, reviewy. So hot. Notice the power sparks around Natasha's hands, clue-seekers? No, not the multi-colored lights in the sky; those are fireworks, it's Independence Day. Take a look at her hands, then check for identical ones in last week's comic or next week's cover. Speculation may commence.
The rest of this issue is our space-bound heroes taking on a gigantic edition of Devilance the Pursuer, looking a lot less Jack Kirby than he did in his prior two appearances. There's a fight scene, but it's somewhat vague. Animal Man does something, but it's not entirely clear exactly what that is he does. Adam Strange acts useful even though he can't see what he's doing. And Starfire utilizes super-strength. I didn't know she had that power. Hints are dropped foreshadowing the appearances of Lobo and Ambush Bug.
Now, some of you might question why Devilance is so huge. That's because he's a New God. All the New Gods are huge. Tremendous. If you go straight to Apokalips or New Genesis directly from Earth, you will be approximately the size of a bug to the New Gods. That's why they travel with Boom Tubes. Boom Tubes are size regulators. It's nice to see some consistency in continuity hasn't been left behind. The last time this idea was used was during Peter David's SUPERGIRL run.
The last part of the story portion of this week's 52 covers the ongoing drama of The Question and Renee Montoya. That vague sentence pretty much summarizes it. A little satisfaction is given to those wondering how The Question's gadgets work, there's a very butch woman in the second panel of this story (on a page with a 9 panel sequence! Yay, Giffen!), and we get the first appearance of a brand new One Year Later hero that no one ever could have possibly expected… SPOILERXBXaXtXwXoXmXaXnXSPOILER! And that's it.
In the History of the DCU backup we finally definitively learn that OMAC was created by Batman as a response to discovering his memory loss during IDENTITY CRISIS. This means that between the end of IDENTITY CRISIS and the loss of Sue Dibny and the start of 52 where Ralph Dibny is still mourning the loss of his wife, Batman had enough time to create a satellite, get it hijacked by Max Lord, see the world seeded with OMAC nanobots… see where I'm going here? Now that is some inconsistent time compression, and didn't we just read this stuff? We have to relive it in summary? At least the post-Crisis History of the DCU that was produced in the 1980's was a slightly more entertaining read. This is just dullsville.
So in summary: 52 - Week Nine, nothing really happens. Happy Independence Day. Conspiracy theorists can attempt to tally the fireworks explosions to 52. Be here next week for Black Adam, Supernova, and Booster Gold. Me review you long time.
YOUNG AVENGERS #12
Writer: Allan Heinberg
Artist: Jim Cheung (pencils), Livesay with Jim Cheung, Dave Meikis, and Mark Morales (inks)
Publisher: Marvel Comics
Reviewer: Ambush Bug
One comic.
24 pages of story.
One double splash page and five single splashes.
So, I’m about to start about my misuse of the splash page rant, now, right?
WRONG!
Comic book world, take note. Sit up in your chairs. Eyes front. Hands at ten and two. Pay close attention because this single issue of YOUNG AVENGERS should be the blueprint on how to properly use a splash page in comics.
Yes, a large percentage of the pages of this book are dedicated to showing one single image, but the images chosen and how they relate to the story is what makes this issue special.
You see, the splash page has gotten a bad rap over the years. Too many times, it’s looked at as lazy comic booking and I have to say, I’ve read my share of pin-up books to know that this is probably the case with 90% of all books with splash pages in them. I don’t know how many times I have seen a splash of a hero jumping off a roof into the camera, or flying into a camera, or a full page shot of a building or the earth or multiple earths or multiple flying earths with buildings or flying buildings jumping off multiple earths into the camera. To me, this isn’t anything spectacular other than a spectacular way to waste my time and money.
With the beginning shot of Captain America holding a wounded Patriot in the middle of a battle that involves the Kree, the Skrulls, and both New Avengers and Young Avengers (waitaminnit, ain’t that, like, redundant or sumthin’?), I knew I was in for a visual treat of a comic. And that’s what I got.
With this first shot (not technically a splash because there are three panels at the bottom of the page), you are immediately thrown into the action and given a full view of the battle that continues throughout the rest of the issue. But we aren’t treated to an actual splash (a double-pager, none the less) until a bit later. And I have to deem this double-page splash worthy because it is the moment that this series has lead up to since it began…the Young Avengers and New Avengers joining forces to fight a common cause. In this page, every Avenger, Young and New (ugh!), is displayed beautifully by artist Jim Cheung, who has been lingering on the edge of stardom for ages (I remember his work on X-FORCE fer chrissakes!), but has turned up his artistic wattage to super-nova for this series.
But it isn’t until after this double-splash that some of the best use of the splash page is put to print. For the next six consecutive pages, one splash occupies the left page, while six panels dissecting the action taking place within the panel are stacked across the right. This is the comic book equivalent of the MATRIX-like camera pan which spins three-hundred and sixty degrees around the action taking place, offering the audience a chance to see what is going on in every inch of the scene. In one giant splash, you see a handful of Avengers (enough with the Young and New crap), then the panels to the right zoom in and show the intricate and important interactions that are going on amidst the chaos.
This effect completely placed me into the scene. It makes the action seem all the more intense and the establishing splash to be all the more important in setting up the character and story development going on. These aren’t throw away pin-ups. They are pages which show a final battle in a grand sense that establishes a truly powerful scene.
It isn’t until much later in the book that another splash appears. It’s probably the least important one of the book, involving the introduction of one character’s new costume, but since a lot goes on in that panel as well I’m willing to look past it.
I’m even willing to look past the final ensemble splash with the team together and ready for the world because it is, after all, the last panel of this “season,” which does nothing but tempt and tease us for YOUNG AVENGERS: SEASON TWO.
This is a really great comic and one of the most surprising series of the year. I was one of the many who hated the idea of this book when it first surfaced, but now find myself invested in this book more than any other in Marvel’s stable. Strong storytelling. Twists galore. Interesting characters which, any one of them, could carry an entire story arc on their own. And then there’s that beautiful artwork.
Artwork and artists don’t often get the nods they deserve in reviews. It’s often hard to put how one feels about a picture into words. It’s much easier to talk about misuse of character or bad decisions by editorial or how a story twist took you by surprise. But after reading this book, it was the art that struck me first because it wasn’t spectacle for spectacle’s sake. The use of splash highlighted the story, offered an establishment for the characters to spring forth from, and showed this reviewer that a whole lotta splashes don’t always mean a bad thing.
THE ALL NEW ATOM #1
Writer: Gail Simone (with “ideas and concepts developed by Grant Morrison”)
Artist: John Byrne
Publisher: DC Comics
Reviewed by Dave Farabee
“NEW” AVENGERS?
Ha, THE ALL NEW ATOM laughs at your old newness! Merely “New” isn’t new enough, Avengers. “All New” is where it’s at. “All New” still has its new car smell. “All New” won’t spoil for another two weeks. “All New” can be returned within 90 days of purchase!
And now that the titular shininess of THE ALL NEW ATOM is established, we’ll henceforth be calling it simply “THE ATOM.” Turns out “New” in front of any title is, frankly, silly, and that goes for “All New” too. Even when it’s accurate – and this is a new guy wearing Ray Palmer’s old shrinkin’ belt – it’s still just silly.
But the good news is that it’s good – a pleasant surprise after the teaser story in the recent BRAVE NEW WORLD special failed to intrigue. The teaser had piled the verbiage too high, put up a visual barrier with too many skewed Neal Adams-y layouts, and for me hit a pet peeve by tagging a little atom symbol at the beginning of every narrative caption from the hero. The caption thing’s a common practice, but it drives me nuts. If you need a superhero’s symbol floating in front of his every word to tell me who’s talking, you’ve got too much talking going on. Don’t abuse the symbols. Iconography is these guys’ stock in trade, but you can still overdo it, still cause it to lose its currency.
None of these problems is present in ATOM #1, however, which has most everything I’d want in the first issue of a superhero comic. Going against tradition, it actually opens with its cliffhanger – a scene captioned “One hundred days from now” of the JLA (and seemingly the world) defeated by armored baddies who could be human or could be alien. The choice of tenses in their speech is especially curious: “We have warning you. We have kill any sentient who is not cooperate.” Either the earth has been conquered by Borat from DA ALI G SHOW or I’m guessing this might be one of the story elements “based on ideas and concepts developed by Grant Morrison” (per the book’s credits).
Fun set-up, in any case. There’s one other quick teaser of an old man being mauled by small dogs (sub-plot #2!), but shortly thereafter we meet the (all) new Atom. He is Ryan Choi, a young, Chinese-born academic setting up shop as nuclear physics professor in DC’s fictional city of Ivy Town. Ivy Town, for them not immersed in DC lore, is the setting for most of the adventures of the best-known Atom, Ray Palmer. Unlike cities Gotham, Opal, and Keystone, it’s currently short on a defining identity – and I’m kind of hoping one of the book’s secondary goals will be to establish one. Certainly, Gail and artist John Byrne take steps to play up the quirkiness of Ivy University, likely to be the book’s core setting.
Much of the issue follows Choi settling into the university. We learn he’s been corresponding with Ray Palmer since childhood, and will be taking his old position, old office, and old house. The dean turns up his nose at Palmer’s costumed adventures, but I was thankful we got minimal detail on precisely what curtailed them – the unsavory, sometimes inane events of the influential IDENTITY CRISIS miniseries. Instead we get Byrne doing a fine job creating a lived-in, comfortable look for the campus as Gail intros a host of oddball fellow professors whose first interactions with Choi come about during a poker game. They’re all of ‘em characters, ripe for Gail’s trademark witty scripting, and the game a clever device to establish them outside the dusty realm of academia. It seems they’re not only to be the book’s main supporting players, but the scientific support team behind Choi’s adventures as the Atom.
Speaking of adventure…
Yes, we do get some shrinkin’ action in the first issue! No need to spoil the series of cryptic clues that sets it up, but Choi does stumble across Palmer’s shrinking technology – only to accidentally set it off with no preparations. He ends up nekkid, an inch tall, and standing in the middle of a house that might could use an exterminator. Gail’s full of ideas here. A shirt sliding off a desk creates a slipstream that nearly pulls Choi to his doom. A phone’s power cord becomes porous enough from miniature perspective to be a makeshift beanstalk. Yes, and a torn off shirt label is enough material for Choi to cover his nekkidness. “This is the most important experiment I’ve ever been involved in,” he muses, “I can’t do it with my guy stuff hanging out!”
I figure it’s got to be a tough job to draw the Atom’s adventures at shrinky-size, because you want to emphasize his smallness, but you can’t do so at the expense of some traditional “cinematography.” That is, you still need close-ups, medium shots, etc. so the hero can take center stage. For the most part, Byrne finds a good balance in this, but I found myself wanting more of the wild perspective stuff to make the Atom’s world a bit more visually unique. There’s a panel of Choi looking up at a microscope that looms crazily overhead and Byrne really knocks it out of the park. I’m hoping to see more strangeness like that as the series progresses.
My only real complaint about the issue is Ariel Olivetti’s painted cover of GIANT-ANGRY-ASIAN-MAN-WHO-WILL-SMASH! Nice enough painting, but doesn’t so much speak to the youthful, inquisitive, decidedly non-angry depiction of the character within.
What you’ll get if you pick up THE ATOM #1 is just a damn good superhero kickstart. The writing is dense, with meta-contextual quotes from scientists and thinkers sprinkled among what’s already plenty of talking, but the net effect is that it feels filling, not crammed like BRAVE NEW WORLD. There’s another seeming positive effect of Gail’s talky script: Byrne’s sometime over-reliance on non-orthogonal layouts are wholly replaced by a more traditional layout sensibility. Who knows, maybe Byrne’s just waiting for Choi to put on the costume before breaking out the wild stuff, but this reader found the ol’ 90° discipline to be a visual comfort.
Right now, I’m thinkin’ THE ATOM is the strongest debut to emerge from DC’s INFINITE CRISIS. Can’t quite pin down why it trumps the surprisingly entertaining new BLUE BEETLE or the not-without-its-charms relaunch of WONDER WOMAN, but it just seems to have the most potential of all of them, the most neat stuff.
Which is cool. Been wanting to see if anyone could really make a go of the perilous “shrinking hero” concept.
SIDEKICK #1
Writer: Paul Jenkins
Penciler: Chris Moreno
Publisher: Image Comics
Reviewed by Humphrey Lee
Eddie Edison's life sucks. Destitute pizza delivery boy by day, sidekick to one of the most powerful but cornball and borderline retarded superheroes on the planet by night. The only highlight of his life in between getting ripped off by customers and barely surviving his crime-fighting endeavors due to his cohort Mister Excellent's incompetence is the fact that he's schtupping his wife on the side. But eventually Eddie realizes that he's been getting stiffed when it comes to the rather lucrative financial benefits to being the sidekick of one of the world's most popular superheroes, and decides it's time to play the field a bit in the superhero community.
SIDEKICK is an extremely fun book, if not but a little flawed. I've read quite a bit of Paul Jenkins' work in my comic reading career, but I had no clue he has such a dirty sense of humor. And SIDEKICK revels in it and is all the better for it. Lots of chuckles abound as we watch Eddie go through the motions of his shitty life. Having to deal with a moron the level of Mister Excellent as he just barrels headfirst into any situation without a second, or hell, even a first thought makes for some great visual gags. And like I said, the book has a rather filthy tone to it too and makes for some rather, uh, visceral moments like when Eddie's stripper girlfriend shows up at his place. I really don't want to know what the rubber ducky was doing there... Bad Little Monkey indeed. There are a few jokes that fall flat, but that's the chances you take with books like these. But on the whole the gags kept a smile on my face and were well worth the three bones this book cost.
And as far as the full package goes, the visuals held up their end of the bargain too. I've "known" Chris Moreno for quite a bit (isn't the internet wonderful?) and I've seen him work his pencils in many ways and he works good magic here in the pages of SIDEKICK. The art is appropriately "cartoony" for lack of a better term. Perfect uses of the kind of elements that make this kind of artwork what it is, the big facial expressions like unbelievably wide-eyed looks of shock and horror, big shit-eating grins for added comedic effect, and just nice little background details around the scenery to make the book feel much more full and lively (Seriously, what the hell is that rubber ducky doing there?). This was just a perfect example of the artist complementing what the writer wanted to go with his words.
SIDEKICK is definitely more of a "guilty pleasure" type book, but the key word there is "pleasure". Laughs were consistent, the characters were wonderfully whacked out, and the art gave it all really great energy. I'm kind of glad this is a mini-series though, because I do think this type of story could wear on me after a while, but I'm assuming the five issues of this we're going to get will be a very enjoyable ride. Definitely a book to at least give a look over if you have some spare time at your LCS.
TEEN TITANS #37
Writer: Geoff Johns
Artists: Tony Daniel (pencils) & Kevin Conrad/Norm Rapmund(inks)
Publisher: DC Comics
Reviewer: Prof. Challenger
As I said in my JONAH HEX review, this week I'm giving DC props for some of what they're doing that's right. I really wasn't sure immediately when TITANS jumped ONE YEAR LATER. But, now that we've hit issue 37, I gotta say Johns and Daniel have started hitting their stride with the new status quo. I mean this was some messed up story the past few issues with the Doom Patrol and the Brotherhood of Evil. But it all works together to tie back into the death of Superboy, which Johns has been using effectively in TITANS as a trigger for some solid character development with the core team members.
What's also so good about this story arc is that Johns has somewhat restored my broken faith with how effectively he reintroduced the Doom Patrol back into the mix of continuity. He accomplished in three issues what two recent failed DOOM PATROL series have been unable to do. He reintroduced a Doom Patrol made up of the original members, Mento, and additional new members. But he did so within the actual concept of the series rather than just superficially acknowledging the concept. The Doom Patrol are supposed to be "freaks" who don't just function outside of normal society, but feel alienated from normal society. In Johns' version of the Patrol, and he may actually be picking up on an idea fostered by Grant Morrison but I can't recall, the Chief is a sociopathic, narcissistic, manipulative control freak who actually caused the "accidents" that turned them all into freaks. Now he sits around and feeds their insecurities so that they will obey his direction and not leave him alone.
In last issue's surprise, and disturbingly funny, climax Monsieur Mallah helped Brain transplant his…brain…into a cloned body which looks a bit like one of those creepy melon-headed aliens from STAR TREK'S "The Menagerie." Well, if they ran around in a ridiculous looking supervillain costume with a flared collar and cape. Johns pulls out all the sadistic, yet funny, stops here with Mallah and The Brain, including Brain inviting the love of his life Monsieur Mallah (a male ape by the way) to come kiss him. Hmmm….let me see…so, The Brain is not only "gay" he's also got a thing for animals….and yet…uh-huh…there it is on the cover. It is pretty small now, but it is there: "Approved by the Comics Code Authority." OK. If gay bestiality isn't cause to raise an eyebrow at the "Comics Code Authority," I ask you just what is? Either way, I got a chuckle out of it.
But, really, the fight with the Brotherhood of Evil is only a small part of this month's issue. The bulk of the comic is really focused on the personal struggles of the characters. Each one of them gets a nice shining moment, and even a big shocker moment at the end that I won't spoil for you. Very soap opera-ey, but hey, you get rid of the tights, capes, and powers and comics really are just soap operas in pamphlet form.
Anyway, I'm digging what Johns and Daniel are doing right now. They gave us a glimpse of some of the new characters who tried being Titans during the ONE YEAR AGO time, and I basically just wanna know who the red-haired, green-skinned hottie in the Martian Manhunter outfit is. Tony Daniel improves with every issue. The cover with a pinup of Kid Devil is outstanding and that worms-eye splash shot of Wonder Girl flying on page 3 is just delicious. There are times where some of his figures are a little stiff or the expressions aren't…well…that expressive, but I like his stuff and look forward to each month because he improves his storytelling and his basic drawing each month that passes.
I have one question though: Why does the cover say "Hell Hath No Fury…Like Kid Devil!" when the title of the story is simply "The NEW Teen Titans: Part 4" and Kid Devil doesn't do one blasted "fury"-driven thing in the whole comic? Just wondering.
THE THING #8
Dan Slott: Writer
Kieron Dwyer: Artist
Marvel Comics: Publisher
Vroom Socko: All In
All good Things…
This is the final issue (for now) of this series, and man alive does it end with a blast. For starters, there’s Kieron Dwyer drawing damn near every superhero Marvel has participating in the first ever Poker Invitational. The opening has something like half a dozen tables going. The poker, however, is only a framing device for a hodgepodge of shorter stories, each one better than the next. The best one from a Dwyer fan standpoint is one featuring everyone’s favorite goofball alien The Impossible Man. It’s only three or four pages, but you can clearly see that Dwyer’s having fun with this section.
Now Dan Slott, he’s having fun throughout the entire issue. There’s the various gags around the poker tables, the running joke that is the Great Lakes Avengers, and a hilarious switcharoo over who wins the tournament. The Thing also manages to have a crazy team-up with Squirrel Girl, and let’s face it--what story involving Squirrel Girl ISN’T crazy? Then there’s the final storyline. It wasn’t silly, it wasn’t balls to the wall action packed, and it wasn’t earth-shattering madness. What it is, is one of the sweetest moments the character has ever seen. I won’t dare spoil it here, but it’s a moment that actually managed to bring a tear to my eye. It’s damn perfect.
Is there anything that isn’t perfect? Well, the Arlo subplot that’s been running through the title is resolved a little too pat for my tastes, but seeing that this is the final issue I wouldn’t hold that against the book. There’s also the ending, which is funny and all, but it ventures a little too close to Mallrats territory for my tastes.
So is this the end for Dan Slott’s Thing? Who knows, Marvel did give Slott’s SHE-HULK a second chance, and the rumor is that if next month’s TPB collection does well we might see another resurrection in Slott’s future. In any case, Slott is a writer that has the perfect style for the superhero genre, and I’ll consider myself lucky if he’s given any new book from the House of Ideas. I’m personally rooting for a Post-Civil War relaunch of Avengers West, actually.
But that’s in the future. When it comes to the here and now, there’s a fun as all getout book sitting on the stands that it’d be more than worth your while to pick up.
O.C.T. – OCCULT CRIMES TASKFORCE #1 (of 4)
Writers: David Atchison with Rosario Dawson
Artist: Tony Shasteen
Publisher: Image Comics
Reviewed by Dave Farabee
A few years back, Kirsten “Mary Jane” Dunst threw out some ideas for a new Spider-Man direction:
“It would actually be really interesting if SPIDER-MAN died. Why doesn't the superhero ever die? I think if Mary Jane was alone, pregnant and he died, she could give birth to a spider baby and carry on the series with another young boy or something like that.”
Comic readers are still in recovery. In fact, Dunst’s words put the industry on a permanent state of alert against Hollywood hotties involving themselves in comics. And so it was I approached O.C.T., a concept developed by Rosario Dawson, with guns drawn. You know Dawson as Gail from SIN CITY, Naturelle from Spike Lee’s superlative 25th HOUR, and for general nekkidity in Oliver Stone’s ALEXANDER. She seems to have some geek cred in interviews, but cred can be faked. Trust no one!
But you know what? O.C.T. is kinda fun. It’s familiar territory – a police division for the supernatural - but packs enough neat ideas and slick art to earn Dawson and her collaborators a pass. And I should note that it’s not actually Dawson doing the writing but newcomer (at least to the best of my knowledge) David Atchison. Dawson’s mainly on the concept/plotting side and also lends her likeness to the lead character, Detective Sophia Ortiz. Surprisingly, and pleasantly, while the sepia-toned art is photo-referenced, Dawson’s not made up to be a Top Cow-style hottie. In fact, there’s no T&A at all. Realism’s the order of the day, and Dawson’s Sophia Ortiz pretty much looks like a normal cop.
With slightly above-average hair.
Our intro scene to the character has her investigating a noise complaint, only to stumble into some supernatural nastiness. The photo-derived art here is slick on the surface, but trips a bit during action sequences. When Ortiz breaks the door down, for instance, it looks more like she’s just leaning on it. Here’s where you want some judicious motion blur effects or, though they’re shunned in some overly serious quarters, sound effects. Ortiz survives the encounter, but a special crime unit takes over investigating the scene, kicking her out without any explanation or even questions about what she’s seen. It’s the weakest part of the book because of the jumbled action and the reader realization that the total violation of cop protocol with Ortiz’s dismissal is about the last way a secret unit would stay below radar.
It gets better when we see a bit of Ortiz’s downtime as she experiences a mysterious suspension. She talks to her mom on the phone. She gets bills. She bundles up against the Manhattan cold. A nice little bit of humanity.
A few days later, those same bums who were walking all over her crime scene suddenly transfer her to their division: the O.C.T., or Occult Crimes Taskforce. I was a bit put off by the reveal that Ortiz’s deceased father was a member of the O.C.T. back in his day (it’s part of what convinces her to join), but given the force’s magic dealings, I can see how family lines might actually be important. Still, feels a bit cliché in execution.
More interesting is Ortiz’s actual indoctrination into the O.C.T. The story moves along at a brisk clip as she learns that Manhattan sits on a gateway to another realm, which on one level feels a bit “Hellmouth”-ish, but per the text training manual in the back of the comic, actually comes with the fun explanation that that’s why the Indians sold the island for so cheap in 1626. Payback, paleskins. And it’s one of several entertaining ideas in the book, from a mace-type spray that makes the intangible tangible to informants with demon faces on their bellies to police badges that not only block enemy spells, but act as foci for spells the officers themselves are taught. There’s always a certain charm to this phase of genre stories where the trainee learns what it takes to survive in a world that’s much stranger than he thought. And if O.C.T. isn’t the most original concept to be found, it still manages that charm quite nicely.
Dialogue’s solid. A little uninspired here and there, but solid.
The art, despite the aforementioned issue with action, is actually above average for the school of comic artists deriving visuals directly from photos. The characters don’t look overly posed, the freakish stuff (like the guy whose head looks like a skinned horse head) pops quite nicely, and the sepia-and-sickly-green color palette lends it the surreality it needs.
A few months back, reviewing the revival of the mystery comic MAZE AGENCY, I had to reluctantly admit that as a representative of the mystery genre, it was pretty good…for a comic. I hate to use that phrase, because comics can absolutely match the peaks of other mediums, but sometimes it’s accurate. Would I have rated MAZE AGENCY highly if it were a TV show or a prose story? Not really. But as a comic, where its genre’s more of a novelty, it gets a few points for going against the grain. And right now that’s where O.C.T. is. Pretty entertaining horror/cop outing…for a comic. Certainly better than expected, so definite congrats to Dawson and friends on that, but it’ll need a bit more before it can get more than a casual recommendation.
It does get that though, and I expect to keep up with it for its well-realized take on magic and rather nice visuals.
JSA #82-87
Writer: Paul Levitz
Artist: George Perez, Bob Wiacek, Jerry Ordway, Rags Morales, Luke Ross, Dave Meikis
Publisher: DC Comics
Reviewer: Squashua
JSA #82
Do you know who the Gentleman Ghost is? Do you care? It turns out that Batman and Superman fought him back in the Golden Age at one point and it was a pretty classic battle even though we're not quite sure who else besides Power Girl remembers it and why.
JSA #83
Oh, here's why we're hearing about the Gentleman Ghost: we're going to be subject to his cockney-accented word balloons and origin for the next five issues until the JSA is reset. We'll get action involving most modern JSA'ers being unable to hit the Gentleman Ghost while only a couple can actually make physical contact with him. When will we find out why this happens and the true nature of the Gentleman Ghost? Probably in issue #87. The rest of the issues are filler.
JSA #84
Yep, filler. Back in the day, this sort of tale would take half an issue and we'd get a Plastic Man backup story. Shame on you.
JSA #85
Isn't Power Girl ever going to learn that she can't hit the damn Gentleman Ghost? I guess that she has to try to hit him at least once an issue. This pacing reminds me how dull the "Hypothetical Woman" arc from the JLA CLASSIFIED issues is. Take that as a hint. At least we find out that even if you've been erased from continuity, your ghost hasn't been. That fact helps make that Deadman-meets-Pre-Crisis-Supergirl's-Ghost Christmas story feel officially justified.
JSA #86
In these paced-for-trade issues, all the actual ramifications take place within the final issue. Especially in a 6-issue arc, these "middle issues" are just filler for you to waste your hard-earned money. Also, the middle issues pretty much reiterate what's been said before in the prior issues, but with maybe a little added information. JSA truly ended at issue #81, or #82 if you're really a stickler.
JSA #87
Just like the final JLA arc before they cancelled the series for a re-launch, JSA went out with a whimper. I guess the brownstone is a bit destroyed and everyone is somewhat disillusioned, but I don't understand how this calls for a team redux. It's not like it hasn't happened before. If you're really jonesing for some JSA action, go read CHECKMATE for your fix. It's a much more entertaining read.
FOOL'S GOLD V.1
Creator: Amy Reeder Hadley
Publisher: Tokyopop
Reviewer: Dan Grendell
"Is it fate that all girls are drawn to jerks?"
So, a common manga romance plot has a girl/woman (or sometimes boy) fall for a jerk, only to ignore the person who would treat them right, then finally see the error of their ways (or maybe not). Really, this isn't just a manga thing, it's endemic. PRETTY IN PINK was the example most people I knew would bring up, but there are plenty. It was common wisdom as I grew up - girls date jerks. The stories just played on that.
FOOL'S GOLD takes that idea and turns it a bit. Sure, girls date jerks - until one of their own points out how many eligible non-jerks there are, and they form an anti-jerk union. That's basically what happens here, when high school sophomore Penny - clothing designer, sewing maven, and single girl - gets tired of seeing her best friend dumped on by her lame boyfriend. When the chance to run the geology club comes, Penny takes it, and turns it into a secret Girl's Club where they discuss who in school is actually fool's gold - all looks but really worthless.
The club takes off and Penny's popularity skyrockets. The jerks in the school find themselves dateless. Without knowing why, Penny's handmade fashion line takes off, and everything seems to go swimmingly. She even lands a boyfriend of her own. But when her best friend moves and a member of the club, jealous of Penny, reveals its secrets to one of the boys, what will the future hold?
I didn't find the plot here to be too hard to buy once you accept that, although there are women who are jerks just as much as guys, the jealous club member is intended to represent that subset for story purposes. Hadley has created a clever idea here with strong women taking charge of their lives, and I can respect that, especially as she's careful not to imply that all guys suck or anything like that. In fact, she's speaking just as much for those many guys who get a raw deal from girls who ignore them for lameasses as she is for the girls who take crap from said lameasses.
The artistic focus here is a lot on the costuming, as can be expected in a manga where the main character makes all her own clothes and sells her designs to other people. Hadley is quite inventive in this regard, and it was always interesting to see what the characters would be wearing next. The characters themselves were always drawn technically well, though a sense of movement and emotion was missing - it often felt as if I was seeing a drawing of dolls or mannequins. This did little to detract from the overall impact of the manga, however. (Preview here)
FOOL'S GOLD is an excellent first outing for Hadley, and I look forward to more work from her in the future. An impressive performance.
QWAN Volumes 2 & 3
Created and Illustrated by: Aki Shimizu
Published by: Tokyopop
Reviewed by: superhero
In my review for the first volume of QWAN I was just wildly enthusiastic about the book. I even went so far as to compare it to the incredibly popular manga series NARUTO.
I was wrong. QWAN is better than NARUTO. Way better.
With these volumes QWAN jumps into the pantheon of all time great manga books for me. Volumes two and three are that good and that fun. It’s true.
Volume two continues the QWAN saga as the major players finally reach the emperor’s palace in search of the Essential Arts of Peace, a scroll that could reveal the mystery behind Qwan’s arrival on Earth as well as what his ultimate purpose in life might be. While not much of Qwan’s origins are actually revealed in this particular volume we are treated to the history of Daki, the insect princess. The story behind Daki’s origin was fascinating to me as it was filled with equal parts mystery and sadness. Creator Aki Shimizu does an amazing job in this volume of interweaving bits of the past with the adventure taking place in the present. Throughout this volume there is an underlying betrayal that is ultimately responsible for much of the events occurring in the book and the tale Shimizu weaves is a heartbreaking and fascinating read. As I read the second volume I couldn’t help but feel sorry for the insect princess who is ultimately revealed to be nothing but an innocent pawn in a game that is much larger than she could ever have imagined. Much of the back story is somber and even creepy at times but there is still enough room left for action. As a matter of fact, the one big combat sequence that occurs in the book actually mortally wounds a major character in the book. By the time I’d finished the second chapter of QWAN I was ready and willing to consume the third volume of the story.
Volume three did not disappoint. While I was obviously impressed with the first two books this one was the chapter that just pushed the book toward greatness for me. So much great and wacky stuff happens in volume three of QWAN that I find it hard to express my enthusiasm for it. Just when you think you know where the story might be going or you think that it might be setting into a typical manga adventure storyline the author ends up throwing you a huge curveball. In volume three a major villain gets such a horrifying comeuppance that I actually ended up feeling bad for him. If that weren’t good enough, the quest for QWAN’s origins (try saying that three times fast) ends up taking the protagonist to an almost Alice in Wonderland dimension that I can only call Mustache World. Yes, you read that last line right, Mustache World. See what I mean? Wacky.
But it’s not so wacky that it takes away from the enjoyment of the story. That’s what’s so great about this series for me. It can be compelling fight for your life combat one moment and the next the lead character is dropped onto a planet where, if you don’t have a mustache, you’re pretty much the scum of the earth. That, to me, is the genius of QWAN. At its beginning it seems like it’s going to be nothing more than lighthearted anime fare but what you get as you go on is some really fun and fully developed storytelling. In the sea of manga books out there QWAN really is a shining jewel. Sure, it’s an eccentric shining jewel but it’s a jewel nonetheless.
And don’t even get me started on the artwork. It’s beautiful. The line work, the storytelling, the pacing--it’s just all around great. Yes, it does somewhat look just like a lot of other manga out there but there is something so subtle and clean about Shimuzu’s art that I just fell in love with it. As a matter of fact the art won me over so much that I can’t wait to pick up the first volumes of the creator’s other books, SUIKODEN III and BLOOD SUCKER.
Before I sign off I’d like to say that according to Tokyopop’s website there doesn’t seem to be a release date for the next volume of QWAN. Years ago there was a Tokyopop book called GATEKEEPERS that I loved and was eventually pulled after only two volumes. I hope that the same is not happening with QWAN. It’d piss me off to no end to have this book end abruptly at its third volume. QWAN is so good that I’m pretty much positive that I’d go out of my way to finish the series and I’ve only done that with two other manga series before: BATTLE ROYALE and KAZAN. If there’s anyone out there in Tokyopopland reading this get up off your ass and get the newest volume of QWAN out in the stores because if any book deserves to be on the shelves it’s QWAN.
OLD BOY V.1
Writer: Garon Tsuchiya
Artist: Nobuaki Minegishi
Publisher: Dark Horse
Reviewer: Dan Grendell
"He's still got an aura about him... doesn't he give a damn about that ten-year gap in his life...?"
Most great stories start with an interesting hook, and OLD BOY definitely has that. Our hero - I'll just call him that, because we don't learn his real name in this volume and he goes by aliases like "Mister" and "Yamashita" - begins the story after being released from a ten-year stay in a single room. He has no idea who locked him there or why. He awakened there one morning after a night of drinking in Tokyo. Every day he was fed Chinese food by his captors, and each month his hair was cut. Beyond that, a television was his only companion.
During his time in the room, our hero has not been idle. The time was spent trying to keep sane, to keep human - and watching the television, to keep up with events in the world outside. Every other waking moment was taken up with exercise, producing an incredible physique by the end of his stay. His plan? To find whoever imprisoned him after his release and take revenge. For that, he would need a clear, strong mind and a powerful body.
Immediately after being released our hero finds some thugs and tests his new muscles, robbing them for a change. This gives him some money to find a place to stay and some food, where he meets Eri, a lonely waitress who invites him home for companionship. With her help, he plans his next moves, gets a job as a construction laborer, and begins searching the city for the Chinese food whose taste he knows so well.
Occasional appearances by the man who put him in the lock-up, and who is following our hero again now that he is out, give the whole vendetta a sense of history and malice, and flashbacks help explain small parts of the history behind their relationship. Much is left to interpretation, however, at least so far, and it is clear that there is a lot of compelling story yet to come. What would make a man hate so much that he would have someone locked away for ten years? Was it an attempt to crush our hero's spirit or get him out of the way? What will happen when and if they finally meet?
Minegishi's art gives the manga its own look. His choice to give our hero a Mediterranean or possibly even Middle Eastern look is an interesting one; it sets him apart visually from the main characters of so many other books, and yet he doesn't feel at all out of place. Eri as well is drawn with an odd sort of innocence that fits her character as a virgin before she meets our hero, but she starts to gain inner strength as the story progresses and this comes through well in the artwork. (Preview pages)
OLD BOY is one of
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but seriously, fuck that picture of Prime, man.
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Believe it.
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Why nothing on the new Dilbert?..
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Shouldn't there be some reference to the movie adaptation in the above review?
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Nope,the film is based on the Manga. :-)
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About damn time. Of course, now I can't remember what I've wanted to talk about for the last two weeks.
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Was Ivy University built by Renaisance-era Italians? Blech on that design.
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IIRC, Morrison's DOOM PATROL was the origin of the Chief as evil prick/manipulator and the M. Mullah/Brain freaky love relationship.
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Young Avengers 12: Take note artist, this is what you do when a writer turns in a halfassed script that takes all of 5 pages of actual story and you have to do your best strecth it out for a whole issue.
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As lame as they are, people read Spider-Man, Fantastic 4, Hulk, Superman, etc.
Who cares about "Young Carrot Ninja Troopers" from Jojo Press? -
I'm keeping this book on a short leash. Too "same old, same old" to me. I stopped buying X-Men back in the mid-90s because the Summers family subplots were becoming too convoluted (Cable is Cyclops' son, anyone?). Now I'm willing to give Uncanny another shot, and the story is about a new, evil Summers brother, ret-conned in with some shady business by Xavier? Ugh. *** Although I admit I did like Bru channeling a more concise Claremont with his use of captions.
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So I haven't been buying a lot of comics these days, but I pick up most of the Civil War tie-ins last week, hoping for a overdose of guilty-pleasure fun. ** I end up feeling more like I ate something bad. These books weren't terrible, but they left me feeling terrible. I don't know if it was Captain America wishing he was back in the ice, or this weird "sugar daddy" relationship between Tony and Peter, or Reed not caring at all about Johnny being on life support, or what. These books are just striking one wrong chord after another. I don't want to complain about them too much (Isn't that the @$$holes' jobs? Where were you on this one, @$$holes?!?) But this event is just weird. You know it's bad when the best spinoff book--by far--is Wolverine's revenge bit on Nitro, which contains some wild leaps in logic and truly bizarre art by Humberto Ramos (yet I'm kinda digging it).
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Amy's art is outstanding, and I love the fact that unlike her peers she's starting off with a generally generic idea instead of trying to be groundbreaking and in your face.
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You know, the one where Corben re-imagines Poe, that book which is getting 0.000006% of the marketing power of Civil War or Brubaker's X-Men? THAT is one fucking hell of a comic book. If gonzo sales of Civil War spinoff books allow Marvel some financial flexibility to publish more stuff like POE, I say...bring on the crappy event books!
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I have been away from comics since the mid 90s as well. The Spider-Man Clone Sage almost killed me. Scarlet Spider? What a turd of events.
But I just started reading them again with Civil War. I actually like it a lot. It's weird about Reed not giving a damn about Johnny, but other than that, I really am enjoying it.
The only other comic I will buy is Amazing Spider-Man. I won't get sucked into all of these crossovers.
But so far I like what I am reading. I'm now trying to get al of the ASM backissues from #500 to present.
Also, I highly recommend Dark Horse's Conan.
I am keeping my sights on just ASM and Conan. Especially since comics are $3 each! What's up with that?????? -
Anyone remember Rick Veitch's Brat Pack mini-series back in the very early '90s? Was all about how the Heroes used their sidekicks to generate licensing revenue, and then replaced them when they died, showing the sidekicks slow descent into corruption/drugs/sex. Well, Sidekicks seems to be covering some of the same issues (particularly the licensing revenue)....only FUNNIER! The cartoony style and humor (and profanity) kind of remind me of "the Pro", just not as good. Worth a look though.
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Methinks this could end up like Milligan's run. High expectations, really poor results. Sure, there were a few good issues, but not enough to keep me on the book. Butabout those pesky new Teen Titans, I must admit it's felt like a real guilty pleasure ever since OYL, but I'm lovin the new characters, and by the way, isn't Cyborg now too old to be on the team? When are they going to kick his gray old butt out?
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Brat Pack was fantastic. I highly recommend hunting down the trade as well as Veich's "Maximortal" and the couple of Maximortal / Brat Pack Super Specials. No, I'm not joking.
http://www.comicon.com/veitch/heroica.htm
My comic shop owner wears a "Dr. Blasphemy" T-shirt all the time.
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If I had a say, (sigh, I don't) I'd get rid of all the X Men, not necessarily kill them, but make them all leave the X Mansion for good. Cancel all the comics, I was think about about shutting down everything but Uncanny, but that simply won't be enough! I'd have to get rid of all of them, and start over from scratch. Well, maybe keep the proffesor or Cyclops around to teach the punks how to be super cool mutants. All new characters, a new artist, a new writer, the works. Preferably a writer who had never written X-Men before and didn't read X Men either. That way, we could really take the X Men in an exciting new direction, right? Restore their badassness.
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Also, good reviews and interesting books!
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Everyone: if you haven't read "Brat Pack" or "Maximortal" go out and find them. You won't regret it. Somewhat in the vein of Watchmen in regards to deconstructing heroic archetypes, but actually darker and more pessimistic (stylistically rougher and almost pornographic). Both are very good reads.
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needs to write more reviews. And archive his old stuff somewhere. I'm surprised nobody reviewed Superman Returns.
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Couldn't make it into the column in time due to too many of you humps jumping bail and me having to repair the old collapsible baton. Anyway, consider yerselves spoiler-warned: after issue two's stunning revelation by Honest Abe, now the world knows what's under his stove pipe hat. We begin to see the fallout on Abe's wife Mary, aka Crazy Lady. Meanwhile, Abe's best friend, the Actor, is lurking about but we all know that Joe Quesada has said the Actor will turn evil and committ and heinous act. Who do you think sent Honest Abe those free theater tickets? I know a lot of you long time fans are bitching about the portrayal of Forty Acres and Mule here, but Millar and McNiven are making the inevitible changes. Personally, I never saw them as gay, but when a sidekick is codenamed Mule, maybe Stan and Jack were doing a little double entendre all along. Still, we know how they were entertained by the Scarlet O. With the other heroes allying themselves with either the Marbel Model or the Drunk, Millar has accomplished what Bendis perdicted HOUSE O' M would do (but didn't):"It will make the internet shit a brick!" But how does Stonewall fit into all this?
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Me? I'm looking forward to next year's Civil War: Reconstruction featuring all new characters like The Grand Dragon and Carpetbagger. And I hear they've got big plans for Ulysses!
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My **GOODNESS**, Mr. Black Adam. I wonder why **INTERGANG** dropped off that resourceful refugee on your doorstep and where they really got her.
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Since you've decided to be this week's fuckwit that bitches about what the @$$holes choose to review (from what THEY like to read no less ya dumbass). Allow me to serve you one up: Please quit trying to make babies with your sister, one of you is plenty. (Ya fuckin' fuck....)
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http://dibnydiary.blogspot.com/
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Gotta say, Shi'ar and Starjammers are my least favorite parts of the X-Universe. They always seemed like Star Wars ripoffs shoehorned into the X-Universe and their stories were usually boring and convoluted. However, I do like Brubaker's style, which is world's improvement over the last few writers, including Claremont, who's just become unreadable lately. (Much respect for him and I hope he recovers, but I wish he'd retire). I really liked the character interaction, too. It's no Morrison or Whedon, but I'm looking forward to more.
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Good job @$$holes...it was worth the wait!
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I don't fuck my sister. I fucked your mom and gave birth to you, sonny boy. So don't talk to your daddy like that. Go bitch at your mom for being a nasty slut. The @$$holes (pronounced At-Ssholes??) review mostly shit. And it kills me that their reviews have more text than the fucking comics they read! Bwaaahahahahahahahaaa! Alright, my son. Go tell your mother to stop sucking your dick right now so you can get to Summer school.
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Bilbo, the last thing you need to be doing is saying stuff like this, "The @$$holes (pronounced At-Ssholes??) review mostly shit." Especially when all your currently reading is Amazing Spider-Man. Wow. The empty space you must have in your head. I may be the minority here (am not) but reviews of Bru's first Uncanny X-Men, Invincible, 52, Dini's first Detective, Atom #1, The Things last issue, Young Avengers conclusion, a bunch of manga, indie jones and a comics catch-up review are not only awesome and wanted, but show a diversity of different comics that any rational person could appreciate (not being you). "And it kills me that their reviews have more text than the fucking comics they read!" Hopefully when you start school in about a month you can, I dunno, read a book that has more words than one of your Amazing Spidey issues. It'll be hard for you, but stick with it, a lot of words can be scary, especially if you have to read them all at once but you can do it!
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You know what I dug most about Bru's first Uncanny? The upper left corner of the cover. I miss those. I liked Warpath being back in the mix, He was always obscure enough to be cool, but not overused I think. His vibranium knives were awesome and I've always liked how he was fast and strong and Indian - reminds me of Billy in Predator. Billy Tan does remind me of Finch, but I think that's more because of the colors by D'Armata, which I actually don't really care for. Dave, I'd love to get into the reason why you'd prefer Tan or Finch over Jim Lee. TB gold I say! I have liked all of Brubaker's Marvel work so far. He's got me buying Daredevil and Cap monthly and I'm going to be giving Uncanny my time as well. Now if noly Bachalo would get off the X-Men title, would it be possible to have not only one or two, but dare I say three good X-Men monthlies? Weird.
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You are a fool. The @$$holes review comics that deserve reviewing. They do it for people who deserve to read said reviews. People who don't understand this, that would be you monkey-boy, obviously are not members of that catagory. You can go and read the reviews on Shill-a-rama if you want. No one here will stop you. In fact, noone here values your life, much less your opinion. You are a simple, reactionary, unimaginative, mongoloid plebian. I could expound on your ineptitude, or lambaste you with explatives, but I'll leave that to Psynapse. He has a certain je-n'se-qua for it. I will simply leave you with this, and I encourage response because a verbal beating is no fun if it's over too soon; you could die in a fire while my dog ate your liver, and the only reason I would care would be for concern over Oberon's diet. Adieu.
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OK, so the last post was addressed to BilboRing. It's my first TB battle. Back the fuck off!
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BilboRing, for someone who has admittedly been out of the comics game for so long and who only reads 2 titles, you sure do talk a lot of shit. I will paraphrase the revered Buzz Maverick and say: you just want the books you read reviewed, with the reviewers telling you exactly what you think. I can honestly say I didn't pick up a single book reviewed this week, but I'm going to now because of the reviews. If you seriously, in all honesty, cannot fathom the stupidity of comments like "As lame as they are, people read Spider-Man, Fantastic 4, Hulk, Superman, etc." then leave and don't come back. Because this column writes the best reviews on the net, about a diverse and huge amount of books. You know, maybe there's a reason why you see AICN quoted on tons of comics and trades??
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The best you can do is to copy my line and try to expand on it? Well I knew someone with a mother's basement dwelling nick like "BilboRing" would be lacking in actual originality anyway but damn son. Then again given the books you name an original thought is expecting way too much I expect. Aaah piss off ya zit-faced plebe.
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Nobody here likes you. Go away and leave this site alone.
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..myself, I have to say that this particular set of reviews made me interested in these comics, which is pretty hard to do.
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Sounds really deep and moving. In a massive-after-Thanksgiving-dinner-turd kind of way.
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esp THE ALBERIC HERESIES, Midnight Sun, have to pick up the trade to Polly and the Pirates since my store is sold out of 2-5, and how the hell did I miss that Dark Horse 25cent special??? ***
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BilboRing is in Jr High. That's fine then. Go ahead then, Kid. It's good that you're getting in some after school reading, but you do know that this stuff doesn't actually count as "homework" or "extra curicular activities", right? Anyway, I'll just be here. Having intelligent, insightful conversations about comics, games, X-men sexcapades, and various and sundry bread concoctions with my fellow Cogs. Run along now, I think the 3rd period bell is gonna ring soon.
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**Nobody here likes you. Go away and leave this site alone.** HA! We're dealing with a fucking KID here. Come back when your balls drop you punk ass.
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That's why I went easy on him on him in my second post. I was kinda hoping to do a tag team on him, where you'd steal his lunch every other post, and I'd tell him why he sucks for letting it happen, but now I just feel sorry for the little tyke. Almost. ;P
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thank you GreatA and Psy, thank you plenty! *** Where's my boy, Kal-El? Aer you stuck in the Vegasverse. Do we need to have a Cog rescue mission? Bake the bread and ready the Spectregans! *** If Buzz was marginally interested in a lot of these reviews then YOU KNOW all particiapating @$$holes did above and beyond their duties. *** I'm still in shock that Dave liked Uncanny
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Do we have a Cogmobile? Cogboat? I know! We should build a Cog-I-Carrier! It could be like a moble Cog Mansion. Who needs faulty boom tubes when we can just ignore international "no fly zones"?
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Mobile, dammit! Mobile! I'm with Psy on the whole "edit feature up in this bitch" issue.
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Personally I found this last arc of JSA to be a well done story that both re-affirmed both the team and it's members and why they work so well together and a nice 'final' story for one of their classic villains. I mean c'mon "She's a virgin, you over-educated moron!" was simply classic!
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Kal-El's in the Halo room.
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I do.
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I haven't read the final issue of the last arc, but in the passing months I would always put off reading it until last because (besides #82) I was just bored with it. Maybe it's a throwback, but I couldn't get into. Squashua's comparison to Simone's JLA: Classified arc is an accurate one I believe. Oh well, wasn't horrible, but wasn't anything to buy in trade form either. Johns is writing the relaunch right?
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Has both spatiasl teleport tubes as well as several wings and rooms of trans-dimensional construction. Unfortunately Vale and I got REALLY drunk one night and used the blueprints for toilet paper. Since then we NEVER go anywhere in the mansion alone, cause you have no idea where you might end up.
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I was already to go too. I had my flying goggles on and everything. You ever seen a Turtle with flying goggles on? F*cking EPIC scary, I tells ya! It even gives me the hibbly-jibblies.
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Is that like the Dr Who phonebooth mixed with the danger room mixed with a holodeck? I hit a wrong button in there once and was trapped at a Barbara Streisand concert for 2 days! Never really been the same after that...
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a lifetime worth of rehabilatation.
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She's no Bea Arthur.
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Dave,
I agree with your Uncanny X-men review 100%. -
I liked the art deco feel, Prof. I said at the tale end of the last tb that Batman's captions and the font used felt like the opening title screen of the animated series, definitely deco and classic feeling. The white star bursts wouldn't have bothered me if I hadn't seen J.H. Williams III use them the same way in Desolation Jones. I love this guy as an artist, he's one of my top favs (Williams, Cassaday, Quitely, Darrow, Ladronn, Jimenez) but the way he drew Bruce was too wrinkly and not attractive as one would think Bruce is. Sometimes he looked like the mugger at the beginning of the issue. Loved the look of Facade and hope to see more of him in Dini's hands. The bit with Robin was good too. I'm loving the direction of Batman and Superman after Infinite Crisis. Any rumors for who's writing and drawing Action Comics when it has it's own locked in team?
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My only doubts are regarding Brubaker
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Gotta say I've been skipping your reviews for the last month or so. This high and mighty "Marvel/DC stuff sucks" attitude had been getting tired. These guys own the market and avoiding their product is like avoiding a Michael Bay movie. Yeah it's been done before and a lot better and talented individuals, but sometimes you just gotta shut off your brain and enjoy the ride.
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Thank you so much Nofate! The @$$es and Cogs have just been dying while awaiting the sunshine of your approval once more......
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I'm sure BilboRing could help bring us all up to speed with our public school education! Kidding! Promise, last one. I dunno, do you think we're supposed to like, Vulcan (really should have went with a different name, like, Bob. Bob Summers.)? Of course I'm sure everyone expects him to be saved or turned to the light by the end, but maybe he won't be? I liked what Dave said about Havok now being the surrogate Cyclops.
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*snickers* heee. But seriously, the @$$es review a bunch of stuff, including the big two, all the time. What gives people? This has been the biggest, bestest column eva!!! Or I could say that I was disappointed that Schleppy didn't comment on Kate Bosworth's pooper in a Superman Returns review, but that filthy little ape was too busy crawling through Alan Moore's beard probably. Oh well
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it was hysterical. It's not nearly as funny when you take it seriously and run with it. Let old jokes fade away.
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I'm with Squashua on this one too. I enjoyed the look back on the Gentleman Ghost's origin, and the story had its moments, but it went on WAY longer than it needed to. Man, did it drag. By the end, I didn't care how it ended, as long as it ended.
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I've never seen the OLD BOY movie, so making any comparisons in the review was something I was unprepared to do. I also don't make it a habit of mentioning every spin-off from a manga in my reviews (though I have occasionally done so, if it has a point, like in my BOOGIEPOP review) simply because the Japanese spin so many things off of manga it seems ridiculous and unnecessary to list them all each time.
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But I agree with commenting on Bosworth's pooper. We should be doing that.
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I will admit that there were some good moments, but I figured out that whole virgin thing when it happened issues earlier. There were a couple of nods to the missing eyeball and Jade being dead, but overall this was a snoozefest. If it lasted 3 issues, I'd have been fine with it, but it was much too decompressed to be a good story. And that's why I said shame on them.
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I like that on my men >_O and Heathen, I guess you couldn't tell by my gay "yay" in the subject line, ass, but my point was I'm glad the @$$holes are doing more mainstream reviews. They've been sucking on the independent tit for too long now.
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I don't agree with that. I enjoyed FOOL'S GOLD, but with others like DRAMACON, PSY-COMM, THE DREAMING, THE ABANDONED, MARK OF THE SUCCUBUS, and plenty more, Tokyopop has lots of good OEL to choose from in addition to imported manga- and that's if you care whether or not your manga is "the real stuff"- which I don't. It's all manga to me, I just want quality.
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That a great deal of my enjoyment of the last JSA arc may be in large part to just how much I enjoy seeing Power Girl look like an actual female again....*shudders from memories (mammaries??) of Infinite Crisis**
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The @$$es don't suck on NOBODY's teat. See they review what they PAID to review unlike the reviewers at other sites (I'm looking at YOU Silver Bullet and Newsarama).
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I don't know how I'd pull it off (Or maybe she would?), but I would bang PG until I FOUND a way to make her feel it. Might take days....SWEET!
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They love reviewing the big two. Gotta say I like their grading system though, the gave a "Burn it" to pretty much the whole Blood of Apocalypse storyline.
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coming to the CW this fall. Check local listings. And last time I checked Conan and Battlestar Galactica are not from the big two. I'll see your 'shut the fuck up you whiny, incorrect teat of a man' and raise you a "lick my nutsack you sad, pathetic asshat"
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nofate, read carefully what I've already typed before
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great reviews guys! keep it up!***nofate and bilbo-fuck you both you ignorant little kids. theres more to comics than the big 2 and your precious ASM comics. dont cdome in here spouting your childish shit and not expect to get called out for it. the @$$holes review books they buy with their own money for FREE. run your own comics review column and then review whatever the hell u want u fucking jizz garglers.
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"As lame as they are, people read Spider-Man, Fantastic 4, Hulk, Superman, etc." That is the saddest, lamest and most ignorant thing i've read in the talkbacks since "No one here likes you". Good talkback guys, lots of fun.
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3...
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I think I saw a serious spoiler on LITG: Writer - Johns and his mentor, Richard Donner, himself! Pencils - Kubert (the one not on Batman). I think Kubert's been a lock for awhile now because I know the bros. got sweet assignments for Supes and Bats books.
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52 Week six Booster calls Manthrax bob, and is corrected that his name is Bill. 52 Week Seven A reporter asks Manthrax his name when he admits he is fake, and he say "Bob Castell"
Any theories, no-prize, Booster's sub-conscience warps time and space theories? -
Man, it was just...man, it's how you do a done-in-one story! Batman was cool, Bruce was cool, the villain was cool, the mystery was cool, and it was all resolved in the end without a motherfucking crossover. BOOYAKASHA! Seriously, I didn't know till the issue came out that Dini's run would be comprised entirely of standalone stories, but given that the DC Universe at large is more chore than joy to delve into these days, I couldn't be happier at Dini's isolationist policy. Robinson's run before Dini tried to be self-contained, but it still had OYL baggage with Two-Face (not to mention a resounding "thud" of a finale), so my initial enthusiasm for that went bye-bye. What Dini and Williams are doing, though? This is the kind of superhero storytelling I've been starved for for pretty much the entire last decade or so. What I'm talking about is stories that don't pant and struggle at being meaningful, at making changes, at reconceptualizing the players at sufferance of the writer's ego. No, I'm talking about stories that just spin a goddamn YARN. ***** Related tangent: Half the reason I'm so fond of Byrne's run on ACTION and SUPERMAN back in the day is because every story was just so *solid*. I don't quite love the stories like I do Alan Moore's "Whatever Happened to the Man of Tomorrow?", but there's an amazing consistancy of quality that, taken as a whole, is just as great an accomplishment. I totally dig that story where Supes has to deal with Mxyzptlk! And the one where he goes back in time with The Demon! And the one where he remembers college girlfriend, Lori Lemaris! And the one where he fights that giant mummy that turns out to be a big robot underneath! Seriously. And that kind of yarn-spinnin' consistancy is also what I think of with Roger Stern's run on AMAZING SPIDER-MAN, John Ostrander's SUICIDE SQUAD, and with all those Byrne/Claremont X-MEN's that folks forget to mention because they *weren't* the Dark Phoenix saga (the Wendigo battle! X-Men vs. Moses Magnum! Arcade's Murderworld!). It's a lost art, because every writer is DYING to make their mark on these characters that really function best in service of a certain timelessness. A simple detective story? Or clever altercation with a villain? Or standalone on the order of that UNCANNY where Kitty fought the demon in the mansion? Nearly extinct. **** And that's why Dini's run, should it continue as strongly as its opening issue, is so welcome. That first outing was just a wonderful little entity existing unto itself, with no need to reinvent the wheel. I want to hug it. Though, yes, J.H. Williams' art felt a touch avante garde for the Dark Knight Detective...I still want to hug it. ******** By the by, as regards the white impact flashes when Batman would clock the bad guys? I wonder if they might be Williams' artsy nod to the 90s Batman toon which would have the screen flash white for a split second after all the good punches. It gave an intense sense of impact - essentially as though the viewer *himself* had taken a lick. Williams' take didn't have that same effect, but I have to wonder if it was at least his inspiration.
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Don't you love some good old fashioned enthusiastic Dave_F?
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Tears of a clown, dude. Me. Pagliacci. The same.
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Well, nails the handling of their relationship anyway: "When Morrison did the gay brain thing it was hysterical. It's not nearly as funny when you take it seriously and run with it. Let old jokes fade away." Dead on. Morrison's curse is that he's got a million and one ideas, and they nearly all turn to shit when anyone else tries to develop them. Problem is, development isn't always the best idea. Grant may be a little too haphazard tossing concepts left and right and moving on, but there's absolutely something to be said for the devil-may-care approach. He throws out the Mallah/Brain thing, and it's a great send-off to the pair in his utterly unreproduceable DOOM PATROL run. Johns gets hold the idea, and suddenly he's got to overthink it, to make it fit in continuity's straitjacket, to literalize what was brilliant in its implications. Likewise, Morrison's "Black Bug Room" from his NEW X-MEN run. When Morrison threw the idea out (I think when Cassandra Nova was performing some kind of mindfuck on Cyclops), no one knew WHAT the fug it meant exactly, but like so many thing Morrisonian, the important stuff could be gleaned from context. Quite simply, Cyclops was mentally immobilized by his fears/guilt/SOME-damn-thing, and Morrison being Morrison, he happened to give the act a buggy Kafka/Burroughs-esque descriptor. But NO, here comes Whedon, gotta revisit Grant's throwaway Black Bug Room and try to EXPLAIN it. It's stuff like this that kills the fun and spontaneity of comicdom's madder ideas. It's Midichlorian bullshit when all we need to know is that the Force surrounds us, binds us, and that if you strike me down, I will become more powerful than you can possibly imagine.
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...you're a man of wealth and taste. SUPERMAN RETURNS? Too tired to throw down on it as bedtime approaches, but maybe tomorrow. Personally, I found it...watchable.
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I'm allergic to penicillin.
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Did I just start a STAR WARS conversation at AICN? Calls to mind the line from that one Russian officer in HUNT FOR RED OCTOBER? "You arrogant ass. You've killed US!" Cue torpedo impact...
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Are you saying Brubaker
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If not, shame on you! Haven't read through it but just flipping though, it looks like a lot of creators from the previous 2 volumes have returned. Which is a good thing, considering Vols. 1 & 2 contain some of the most poignant, beautiful comics I've read. Good stuff. *** In other news, Kirkman has ISSUES. Serious ISSUES.
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If you're into dudes with clams and barnacles growing on his cheeks.
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"What's a nubian?" Ah, classic Star Wars AICN talk. All we need is, Buzz to come in here with an awesome sounding 'better' take on what 'could' have happened. *** Thalya, that would make sense for Action. I knew that Adam Kubert was attatched to something Supes related and I believe I heard mention of Johns, but Donner too? Should be interesting. Regardless, I'll have Superman, Action, Batman and Detective on my pull list and I never thought I would at some points. Same for Uncanny X-Men. Good times. *** vagrant, I think that 'could' be an approach to Vulcan's character, but it's probably still too early to tell. He could be an Ana Lucia type character, that's a good comparison, by the end we could be rooting for him or he could be the new defacto X-Villian. Either way, I can't wait to see how it ends up. *** Shig, don't tell me!!! It's Walking Dead isn't it? Will this one have the force of 20 thousand hurricanes to the scrotum? Is that possible? I'm still getting over the last issue. Ahhh! Haven't read any of Flight, but have always been interested. I may have to check it out now that you recommended it. By the way, I've ordered Mary Jane Loves, Spider-Man for the past two months. : )
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since he's one of them omega mutants.
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...then a huge spaceship with a captive princess rolls almost endlessly across the screen, pursued by single, wounded fighter...see, it's a reversal of the first movie...no this isn't the first movie, it's the fourth. No the one you did in '77 wasn't the fourth because there were none before it...anyway, we all know WHO is in the fighter...yer going to try to have me killed again, aren't you, George."
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Anyway, I ordered it. Who else is considered an Omega mutant now? I bet Magneto is again when we see him pop up in a year or so. Maybe the end of Civil War? And I'd like to say that although this Marvel Event In Seven Parts is flawed a great many of way's, at least Millar's reveal may actually have lived up to some of the hype
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beyond retarded...he probably now can regenerate from a bottle of oxygen he once breathed or some crap...whatever. confirmed omega mutants include Elixir, Chamber
Iceman, Phoenix / Jean Grey,
Mister M, Franklin Richards,Kid Omega, Rachel Summers and Vulcan...the summers/grey family is well represented no doubt. and what will batman/bruce wayne do with an actual blood son instead of an adapted ward? -
Well, he has his kid with Thalya (no, not that Thalya!) that she hid from him, perhaps Selina Kyles new baby (I'm enjoying Catwoman btw) and he just adopted Tim sa a son, because he's be arested these days for having a boy ward. *** Chamber's an omega mutant? Hmm, sucks that there making him into some Apocalypse thingy. I always liked Chamber for some reason.
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IGN did a column on them a while back. I remember Onslaught, Iceman, Franklin Richards, Vulcan and Mr. Immortal (of GLA fame) were all Omegas. There were more, but many of them were newew mutants that I didn't recognize.
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Wolverine is just getting too damn powerful. I think we need to rocket his ass into deep space, where he will live as a peasant in an ancient feudal society. And I didn't bother to read House of M, but when you say that he jumped, does it mean he tried to commit suicide? Perhaps I was misreading it, but I never took Wolverine for a wimp. Oh, and about that Vulcan boy? No he cannot just destroy the Marvel U, because then there wouldn't be any comics left to write. More than likely, he'll get shot into deep space or the sun, depending on how evil Mr. Fantastic feels at the time. On another note, I've been a marvel zombie most of my life (or a marvel vampire if the @$$holes will let me keep the title) buta few years ago, I started reading Teen Titans ( I was a sucker for time travel stories) This led me to pick up a few issues of Outsiders, Batman, JLA Classified and eventually All Star Superman. I've always been one of the kids who absolutely hated Superman, so wasn't I surprised when I found myself wanting to read multple Superman comics, (and Batman, but I've always been into him.) So congratulations Mr. Morrison and Mr. Johns. Congratulations Mr. Quitely and Mr. Kubert. You haven't converted me to a DCophile, but you've certainly helped ease the pain of all the crappy Spiderman stories I've been putting up with. (Loeb and Cambell in '07, spideyfans. Check it out, I know I will)
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Checked it out based on your write-up last week and really dug it. Got me to reminiscing with friends about the rockin' PC game series FALLOUT, and lamenting the lack of good post-apocalyptic fiction in comicdom. But WASTELAND's a good step forward in that direction. I'm sort of hoping that the post-apocalypse will be the new "zombies" in comics, saturating us with so many entries that eventually one rises to the top as the WALKING DEAD of the lot. And there's a good chance it'll be WASTELAND.
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And that's why you never forget to hit submit for about an hour. Anyway, I've always loved chamber, ever since the generation x days. But they've now tied him into Apocalypse? Uggg. Does anyone else remember when he was on the cover of almost every issue of Generation X, regardless of how much he was in the issue? He was like that title's wolverine. And both Skin and Synch are now dead? That's what happens when you take a 5 year break from comics I guess.
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Too dark? It's close to the edge for me, close to veering into exploitation territory. Hmmm. I don't want for WALKING DEAD to lose me.
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The book is full of good ideas, but the writing is abysmal. Every new villain or character gets an introduction, where s/he spouts 2 pages of monologue, explaining his/hers motives and origin. Most of the time this happens even without a reason to say it. And the dialogue in general...try reading only the first sentence in every bubble and skip the rest, you will miss nothing.
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And I think the first digest trade came out recently. Glad to hear it's now on your list Heathen, I've been pimping that book like mad for a while now! That means I HAVE to get the Son of M trade in return, huh? *** Flip through any of the volumes of Flight at your shop and see if you dig it. They are fairly short stories so just read a couple. It's worth it. *** Walking Dead: 30,000 hurricanes.
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catwoman's kid could be his as well...we'll see. i don't want bruce turning into the shawn kemp of dc.
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If I recall correctly his face was fixed by Weapon X but then it exploded again and then some one in Runaways was trying to be him and hey didn't he die somewhere? Ah well. Still, I have to give him credit for shooting laser crap out of his mouth instead of his hands.
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Don't let one page spoil the whole series man! (I assume we are thinking of the same page?...can we speak in non-spoiler code?) You've been saying you "might be" getting tired of or are "thinking about" dropping Walking Dead for a while now. So what's it gonna be? I'm finding it quite fresh that things can change so much in that book.
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I picked it up. Haven't read it yet but it looks cool as anything.
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F'real (an' shit). The one true original, accept no substitutes.
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While I've had issues with WALKING DEAD over the years - mostly the bloated ensemble cast being too much for my little brain to keep track of - I've been really onboard the current arc. The downed helicopter revived a sense of direction and focus for the series and even got the extraneous cast members out of the way for a bit. Cool stuff. Scary. That said, I'm pretty put off by the stuff with Michonne. Call me squeamish, but it's the same reason I avoid horror like THE HILLS HAVE EYES and AUDITION and the Rob Zombie stuff - even though I consider myself a horror fan. Torture, prolonged misery, rape...that level of depravity...it's just my personal limit. I'll deal if the greatness of the story warrants it, but Kirkman's not quite Alan Moore, y'know?
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I'm running Mutants and Masterminds right now for my friends, and I'm planning on having their next adventure take them on a quest for Excalibur, but besides the Arthurian legend, I'm also going to tie in the story of Beowulf. Good idea or bad idea? Also I wanted to share the favorite character I ever created. He was a skeleton of a speedster who fell in World War 2, brought back by the German lord of the dead to do his bidding. However, he gained free will once that guy was defeated. Now he is a skeletal hero with superspeed who can't die(no matter how much he wants to). His name: Dead Heat. That is just an awesome name right there, I'm quite proud of it.
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I think Audition earns the right to have a conclusion that makes you cringe because it gets there slowly. You wanna see some horrible torture? Check out Miike's entry for the Masters of Horror series "Imprint". I've only seen one Rob Zombie film, and that's Devil's Rejects. I gotta say, that one was two tons of fun. Anyone with me? The most miserable time i've ever had in the movies was Irreversible. Fucking movie is more "horror" than most "horror" movies ever dare to be. Felt like being tortured, but never for torture's sake, you know? It's one of the best movies i've seen and i'll never see it again.
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He was depowered by "M Day" or whatever they're calling it. He was seen in the rather surprising and good series, Generation M. In there he looked rough with a big hole in his chest on life support. The one in Runaways was an impostor. And then a few weeks ago they had a preview of New Excalibur that showed *SPOILER* Jono, but looking like a horseman of Apocalypse, or like Apocalypse himself. I missed out on all of Generation X past issue 20. Synch and Skin died? Balls. What about everyone else besieds Banshee, Jubilee, Monet and Emma of course. *** Shig, my navigator, you must by Son of M now. That's the trade! ; )
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LOL I know what you meant, but that sounded really gay.
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I'm with ya on this arc reviving Walking Dead after a particularly dull few issues that saw Kirkman overuse his greatest flaw: overwrought dialogue. I too thought the Michonne stuff was maybe over the top (SPOILERS esp the page with her off-screen END SPOILERS) but scary nonetheless. Scariest parts by far were the "Governor at home" scenes, though. And while I've never seen a Rob Zombie film, I have to disagree with you on Audition. The first 3/4 of that film is so perfectly executed, slowly building and building and building suspense. It's like you are being bricked into a closet and slowly the light is escaping. It's like hearing a faint hum slowly get louder until (at the scene where she paralyzes him) it becomes a white noise roaring feedback loop. The part where she feeds the gimpy dude her own vomit was pretty rad too. "kiri kiri kiri kiri"
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I did not catch that. Gonna have to watch it again. And i agree with you 100% Shig: It builds and builds and builds and builds...
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Just like a momma bird to her baby. Very fruedian.
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I gots'em bulgin' out my shell. I'm one o'them watchacall Jedis. WHO DARES TO DARE MY DARING? Whatever! LET'S FIGHT!
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Shig, I'm talkin' Skarsgard from Hunt for Red October. Gyeh, don't remind me of the barnacles. And Heath, that's Talia, not Thalya, dear.
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dave_f and h.lee's word's are being used and what not...check out this blurb, Dave Farabee of Ain't It Cool News reviewed Uncanny X-Men #475 and says, "This old school X-fan is willing to admit Marvel's mutants still offer a special appeal when done right. Brubaker
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Villains and Vigilantes is where it's at! Chew on that Suckas!:O)
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But I can twix the hell out of some peanut butter nethers in, Y's Warnagler though!
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Thank goodness I was away!
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City of Heroes/ Villains is Where. it. is. AT. bitches!! NUTHIN' (and I mean NUTHIN') beats being able to BE your character in a 3d environment, FUCKING SHIT UP. ( I just took a toon from 0 to 20 in 13 freaking days!!**Trust me, this is impressive for someone that actually has a life outside of the game, which I do**)
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Sorry, Psy, I just can't, CAN'T get into City of Heroes! Online RPGs just bore the hell outta me! I know, I know...something's wrong with me but notning, I mean nothing, beats sittin' down at a table with a bunch of buds and playing an old-fashioned RPG campaign. Of course you have to actually GET the people together in one room but when you're able to it worth the effort lemme tell ya! Good times, good times...Right now in my campaign my players have been jumping from alternate reality to alternate reality in an effort to set their reality right after Neo-Nazi villains destroyed their universe and changed the world so that the Nazis won WW II! First they went to Super-Zombie World (ripped off straight from the pages of ULTIMATE FANTASTIC FOUR) and now they're stuck on Super Medieval Anime World! Super-Craziness ensues and much fun is had!
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And I want in.
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ive never been able to get into table top games too much and ive never tried rpgs at all. see i grew up 7th day adventist and was taught that all those things where tools the devil used to take control of my fragile mind. now that i am an adult and no longer sunscribe to such childish notions i would love to try it out-only problem is all my friends are into video games or sports and poker and blackjack. being that im the geekiest of my circle by a longshot there is no way im talking anyone into playing rpgs with me.:-(. oh well there will always be the halo room
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There is no way in hell getting to see, hear and feel your powers in action can be beat by rolling dice, applying modifiers, and then discussing the action. I've played D&D, Champions, Gamma World, Villains & Vigilantes and damn near any other RPG that came out between '80 and '93 (when having had enough of the basement geek fighting I had my chaotic neutral psionicist magic user slaughter my entire party out of spite and walked away from table RPG'ing for good). Anyone who digs Superheroes (or Villains lol), video games, and RPG's OWES it to themselves to give the CoH/CoV franchise a try. It has it's faults (the engine itself sometimes), but what it gets right it gets right like no other has before it or since.
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to mispelling monthly. i pick it up in the warnagler
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is there no end to my jackassery?
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Saying that this week's Banner is THE LIVING SHIT that only gets cooler each time I see it? 'Cause as far as Talkbacker Sandy Vagina here is concerned it's the muthafukkin' BEST one yet. Take a bow Bug, Take a goddamn bow man!**crowd claps**
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Lame acronym, I know, but good old Mayfair DC Heroes is the shizzle.
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a beagle...but a grizzly bear so it's a grealge...oh colbert, you slay me.
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Although some of the source books were cool. Like that's where I learned that Metropolis is in Delaware...waitaminute...DELAWARE???? Fucking DELAWARE???? I mean, no offense to Delawarians but, shit, man...that was hard to take... :O0
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TURTLE POWER!
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preview looks awesome
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GO NINJA GO NINJA GO!
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and he does indeed, rock. His movie looked good, but The Prestige looks bad ass. *** T-U-R-T-L-E POWER!!!
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I mean shit, it's 10% cooler than the last time I saw it. Dude it's so cool now it's almost as cool as boobs. Almost.
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Jul 14, 2006 12:32:15 PM CDT
Mutants and Masterminds is so awesome, I will now post
by engineer_at_peac
a summary of our last campaign. It's epic shit, man. In the previous issue, a prison breakout occured thanks to the Factor Four. It turned out that they were not nearly as vulnerable to ice as you had presumed, and had been playing possum so they could help fellow Crime League members escape from Blackgate Prison. During the prison breakout Agent 15 had shot an unconsious criminal twice, killing him. He shot him once in the face and once in the chest. Dr. Gizmo Grand and Agent 15 went on to restore the facilities defenses and stop a citywide breakout of Utahraptors(a large variant species of Velociraptor) which was brought about by the Sinister Simian. Agent 15 was arrested and given a restrictor collar.
Which brought us to issue number 5. Agent 15 was brought to trial and only boss Vick Cage and Gizmo Grand were able to make it to support him. A new hotshot prosecutor had gotten the media into a frenzy about this and anchored a jury made of a superheroes' peers... the members of the Freedom League! Things looked bleak for 15 but in the prosecutions opening statement, he began to run as a bomb rocked the courthouse, where the jury was seated. Only Time Wizard managed to escape the explosion unscathed using his stasis fields. He froze time for a moment and informed Vick, Grand, and 15 that he could keep the Freedom League from dying by placing them all in stasis fields, but it would require all of his concentration. It was up to them to protect Time Wizard. As soon as time resumed, five gorillas wearing the colors of the Sinister Simian burst through the roof. The bailiff and guards ran for it. Gizmo and 15 put up a fight despite Gizmo not having his battlesuit and 15 having a collar that restricted his mental powers. A tossed chair from the powerless 15 knocked out the prosecuting attorney. The pair(and Vic Cage) appeared to be losing to the apes, however, until Gizmo got his datalink out of his briefcase and hooked it up. He mentally hacked 15's restrictor collar, causing it to fall off. Repowered, the team quickly took out the gorillas, saving the Freedom League. To their horror, they discovered the outbreak was citywide, however, with Gorillas everywhere. Even more shocking, however, was the revelation gained after unmasking the prosecutor. He was the very same man Agent 15 was accused of murdering! The charges were dropped and the case dismissed.
After using telekinesis to carry the Freedom League in ambulances safely to a hospital, Gizmo guessed that the most logical point for these Gorillas to come from would be the top secret research hospital, St. Claire's, which was located in an underground complex on the northeastern portion of Freedom City. The team drove into the underground tunnel dispatching apes along the way until one ape surprisingly survived an attack and lashed back, jumping onto Gizmo's convertible. After a couple of rounds of combat they took him out, only to find themselves attacked by a super-fast skeleton, insisting they surrender! They shattered its bones, but were soon attacked by more odd creatures: a fly-man and an icy robot. As combat escalated, they were finally approached by an English gentleman who insisted everyone stop fighting. Gizmo recognized him: Sir Isaac Newton! Newton explained their story. They were all freaks of science created by evil masterminds who had banded together to fight for good: The Superfreaks. Icebox was a robot with ice powers who awoke in a refrigerator factory with no memory. Dead Heat was a speedster and World War 2 hero killed in battle, but brought back as an undead years later by the German Lord of the Dead. Flyboy was a teenage gangbanger who signed up for superscience guinea pigging in exchange for leniency, resulting in his hideous form. Electro-Ape was a scientific crackpot who put his brain in not just a gorilla body, but an electric MUTANT gorilla body. Their leader, Isaac Newton, was a clone of the original created to help the evil Clonerizer create a doomsday device. Clonerizer found his lack of computer skills and his inability to grasp Nuclear Physics annoying however, and fired him. Newton went on to make a lot of money suing companies for patents on devices based on the concepts of newtonian physics, as well as suing Fig Newton. These lawsuits stopped once the Supreme Court ruled clones could not hold intellectual property(or likeness rights) of their creator. This Isaac Newton clone also has control over Newtonian physics, including friction and gravity.
It turned out the Clonerizer was behind this plan, teamed up with Sinister Simian. The Superfreaks joined our heroes and went to the facility to kick ass. And indeed they did, combining skills to find the lab of Clonerizer. Clonerizer bragged about his greatest clone creation, seen in silhouette, before activating an elevator and escaping down a long shaft. Before the heroes could follow, more clones emerged. Clones of all the Superfreaks, Gizmo Grand, and Agent 15. Icebox didn't ahve a clone, being a robot, and Grand's clone didn't have his battlesuit, which enabled the heroes to put together a quick and decisive victory. They then gave chase to an underground railway. Icebox formed an icecar for the tracks, Newton decreased gravity making it light as a feather, and Dead Heat pulled it, quickly catching up to another car. Inside the team found Clonerizer and Sinister Simian, who surrendered. Agent 15 found them unprobe-able with telepathy, which was confusing. On the tram they found a device controlling all the clones, and surmised that it was also causing the clones to release an enzyme which kept them stable. Destroying the device, all the clones around the city began melting, including the Clonerizer and Simian they had just captured. Gizmo Grand used his EMP to thwart a bomb assassination attempt, and the heroes went back above to celebrate their victory.
Unbeknownst to them all, or perhaps forgotten, the capsule containing the imposing figure was unnacounted for. In a secret lab somewhere, it's fist pounded against the glass barrier, shattering it. A muscular figure stepped out. "Where am I?" it asked. "Who am I?" it repeated. "Shhh..." it was told as an apelike hand patted its head. "All will be explained to you in good time... Centurion."
You are probably unaware of who the Centurion is. Let's just say he was the world's greatest hero, killed in action ten years ago saving the universe. You've heard of him.
Bet you didn't want to read that, did ya? That's what you get for questioning the single best Superhero pen and paper RPG rulest ever, Mutants and Masterminds 2nd Edition. -
...let's do it right. COWABUNGA, BITCHES!
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Not that I'm raggin you, but I just don't get it. Completely over my head. But I will say, sir, that you have bold words for anyone who likes Superman Returns when you've just posted that recap essay of a pen and paper RPG. I think Knights of the Old Republic or Oblivion will do me just fine for RPG's.
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and engineer i second the 'over my head' sentiment. once again,not a dis just something i know next to nothing about. i would like to tho. i seriously wish i had more geek friends i could get into pen and paper rpgs or heroclix or whatever with. all i have in RL are friends who want to play halo or fight night round 3 or poker. but it sounds cool as hell
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This weeks logo is now as cool as boobs. Is that totally tits or what?
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I am NOT reading that.
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None of that really has anything to do with rules or why it is a great game or anything. I just posted a synopsis of what happened last time I GMed, which I had already written ahead of time and sent to my players who missed the game. And I would not blame you for not reading it. As a matter of fact I'd reccomend you not read it. It's not above your head, it's just like reading about some crappy comic you've never heard of and didn't know any of the characters. Kind of like the last few weeks reviews... ZING! I kid, I kid. Now Superman Returns, when I say I hate it so much that I hate anyone who likes it, I am being a little hyperbolous. But rest assured I did hate it. I saw it, felt it was alright, and maybe it would grow on me. So I went and saw it again. And this time I just hated it. So much. It has nice cinematography, good direction, and keen special effects. I like Brandon Routh. Everything else can go to hell. Actually, that's a decent idea for a sequel. Superman battles the devil. X-men 3 was no masterpiece, but by the virtue of that I didn't hate it, it was better than SR for me. The main reason I love Mutants and Masterminds is its robust and easy character creation system, where I can create things like a clone of Isaac Newton with power over Newtonian physics, or a skeleton speedster that can't die named Dead Heat.
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So maybe that's why I hated SR and not X-3. Because I don't know the X-men nearly as well. While I like the characters, I'm not very versed in them beyond a couple of Marvel Essentials and the 90's animated series. Superman, though, I know everything about him. And I can't tolerate mistakes. My favorite comic movies are Spider-man 1 and 2, Batman Begins, Batman: Phantasm, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, Road to perdition(well I don't know if that counts, graphic novel), and Sin City.
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Kal, being that I am at least familiar with all geeky topics, I of course have knowledge of P&P RPGing. Ask, and ye shall be provided for. Thus spoke A'Tuin.
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Really I did. I just couldn't get through the whole thing. I have some M & M books so I sorta knew what you were referring to at points but not really. Wanna know what's hysterical? Whenever my buds and I play V & V together we marvel as to how much like an episode or the Giffen/DeMatties JLA every one of our sessions comes out like. It's like the most ineffectual super-group ever because of the random dice rolls that it becomes an exercise in hysterically funny and inept super-heroing. Somehow, though, the good guys almost always win in the end in my game.
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He is dead, but he can't be... uh... slain? He keeps reassembling. He can't be put to rest, although he really wants to be. My heroes are often innefectual too, superhero. This one guy in our group, Agent 15, he is a mentalist. Powerful telekinesis, telepathy, and mind control, as well as flight and a force field, and psionic blades that can really hurt. Powerful guy. Well rounded. His combat tactics usually include pulling out his shotgun and shooting people. It's like if Collossus carried around a tazer. Aside from that, during combat, he often just takes one person and keeps flinging them against the wall until they're knocked out, and then while everyone else is still fighting, he will go over and start breaking bones interrogating him. AND HE CAN FREAKIN READ MINDS!
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I second that. You may be right about why you didn't mind X3 like you did Supes Returns. I've seen them both only once, but X3 grates far worse because I've been so connected with them. The thing is, I've been just as connected to Superman, but with Supes it was my younger childhood and with X-Men it was my pre-teen/teenager years and I felt like I had more invested with the merry mutants. I think Superman Returns has some flaws, but I still enjoyed it rather a lot. The Last Stand depressed and angered me the first time enough. Oh well, I can't wait for Spidey 3, Nolan's Batman sequel, Singer's Superman sequel and I want to have a kick ass Wolverine movie - just keep Ratner away from it. *** Hey, Y - Denzel Washington as Master Chief?
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Whoever is RPing Agent 15 is a freaking genius. No shit! That guy is comedy gold.
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Crap, i'll let Vern say it for me: "Ah shit man, I'm gonna say it. I had more fun watching X-MEN 3. (Those are the seven words you recite to bring on a deadly nerd curse.) SUPERMAN is a better piece of filmmaking but I didn't connect with it as much. Singer has already established the type of things that can make these super hero stories more exciting and relevant, and now he abandons them in his new movie.***So this one's kind of the reverse of BATMAN BEGINS. It's got great action but not a good enough story. One of these days you nerds are gonna get both in the same movie and your Hawaiian shirts are gonna burst into flames."
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since i do want to take a pass at the table gaming its nice to know i have someone relatively close if i decide to go for it.and heath that would be awesome!just the voice tho. i dont think they should show master chiefs face in teh movie."Ohhh you shot me in the ass!"(training day)
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i was going to stay out there the whole weekend but financial obligations have made that impossible. i will be there all day satruday tho. if any of u @$$holes or tbers make it out to Con and happen to see me say hey! here is what your boy Kal looks like in case u forgot-http://tinyurl.com/oje8o-
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"Wolverine has been injured before, but never like this. Blasted with 5,000 rounds of machine gun shells and lifted to the edge of earth
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go to comic con that is...i figure over the years the cogs will have their own booth and crap...with booth babes of coarse.
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booth babes galore when we get our place in con! and yeah that sounds pretty cool to me heath. maybe if they showed him like all scared up on one side or something but still ok on the other. i dont know. maybe half cybernetic? now im going to get slapped by the nerd police for this but i have not beat any of the halos. i know i know! i just play multiplayer. in fact when one came out it was just my drinking game of choice before hitting the bar. but with 3 and the awesome looking graphic novel coming out im currently trying to beat halo 1 and work my way from there. please dont kick me out of the cogs...
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But i love...LOVE the idea of Wolverine growing out of a pube. But you're right Heath, taht sounds fucking awesome. Made me want to read a Wolverine comic fer chrissakes!
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If Wolverine could grow out of pubes, that could explain how he's in so many frickin books, wouldn't it?
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Kal-El!!! 5 lashes! Dude, get off the tb and have yourself a Halo campaign marathon! The first one could take a while, but the second is ten hours tops. And after that, read the two Halo books for your geek jones, Halo: The Fall of Reach and Halo: First Strike. Ahhh!!!
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I love getting lashes! but seriously i know i know im working on it!are we back on pubes? it would be my nicely trimmed friend and my colombian friend who initiated the discussion.
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Bringing it back! Awesome. We made need to fill in GreatA on that one ; ) Where are you at on the campaign Kal-El? *** Shig, read Walking Dead. Fuggin A, Kirkman. Please, please, please let Rick, Glenn and Michonne kill the hell out of the Governor. Still counting on Tyreese, Herschel and others to come through. Damn, I'm so hooked on this book. *** I got the Southland Tales comic in the mail yesterday. I'll let you know what I think later.
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My pube-trimmer broke. What am i supposed to do now?!
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but be careful, even strokes. ; )
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That's the last place I'd want a Two Face, but not the last place I'd want two faces
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Tits? Yay for boobies!( In a completely non-erotic but nonetheless amusing anime fan service kind of way)
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Something just occurred to me with what might be happening at DC. How to make the New Gods et al more in line with their God-like level, which is clearly what DC's doing with their "look to the skies campaign"? How to make Darkseid relevant again? In the set-up issue, have Darkseid squash Superboy Prime like a bug.
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on explaining the "well-trimmed man" thing. Unless it's funny. Then go right ahead. Oh, and I'm gonna apply for EiC at Marvel. I'm perfect. I'm fat, I can't draw, and I suck at guitar. No one'll even notice 'till it's too late. Oh and if they need some bullshit ego-stroking company-wide mandate....I hate feet, everyone must wear shoes. Yes, even Namor!
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is that a rob liefeld thing...cuz that man cannot draw feet worth his life among many other things he can't draw...like everything...um...true, the acid thing though...i thought we were talking about hobos...burn em' off with acid...alas not. darkseid squashing superboy prime...i dunno...superboy prime pretty much is now the most powerful individual i can think of in dc and he don't like getting squashed, though i'm pretty sure he'd lose on iron chef. well its 100 today...which is a nice number and all but for a temperature its retarded, not as retarded as wolverine's current healing factor. is it true he can regenerate from his own saliva?
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He can regenerate from his own farts.
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"Regenrates from a fart. Brilliant!!!" Ha, ha. 100 for a temperature is retarded, at leas tyou humidity isn't as bad out west. Fuck, 97 in Florida with it so humid you instantly break into sweat from stepping outside is ball boiling uncomfortable. Liefeld can draw feet/ Oh, so that's what the triangles at the end of their 'bodies' are. Hmm.
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"at least your" - "feet?" - It's due to working on Sunday. That's not the tits, it's the balls.
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ha triangles at the end of their bodies...oh classic liefeld style...if anyone ever utters my art with that statement i'd cry...you know you draw in the classic liefeld style...NO!!!!!!!!!! house of ideas my ass.
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here in loma linda and yeah its fucking balls!lol-the liefeld style!heath im pretty fucking close to the begining but im moving along.house of ideas justin's ass!and 5 more days til i get to go to CON!!!
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that's half the fun with the campaign. There's so many things you can do that Halo literally was the first XBOX game that I bought and everything else just couldn't live up to it. Have you played Breakdown (awesome, trippy, sci-fi) or Riddick (current gen, rocking 360 graphics)? Those were some bad ass games too.
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Best summer movie and best movie I saw this year. I dunno, I'm always so late with shit on here. Maybe I'm just a pirates mark but that movie kicked ass, in my opinion.
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okay, so, you all know i'm a brubaker whore, but i know his turns on Athority and the Deadly Genesis mini were way below par for him. it looked like he just didnt know how to write team books. but i think all that's gonna change with his Uncanny run. this was probably the best "gathering of eagles" issue i've read in a long time. the egypt sequence reminded me of Alias in its heydey when they'd have action sequences abroad. all in all, an amzing issue. and i also nearly pissed my pants when i saw the little heads in the upper left corner. DAMN STRAIGHT!!! this week here in Montreal was the opening of Fantasia. i attended the fest for its first five years, but then just gave up on it cause the audience just got dummer and dummer every year, and the film selection just got worse and worse. but i won some free tickets for this year, so i thought i'd give it a shot. i'm sad the projection room moved from the Imperial, which was a grand ole gothic theater, to Concordia's Main Hall, but since i got my BA at Concordia it makes it almost okay. anyways, saw A Chinese Tall Story and was completely blown away. it is now one of my favorite movies of all time. and i even had a great time in the room with all the other attendees. looks like Fantasia might be back to its old glory. i also ttok advantage of the fact the Concordia is near 1,000,000 Comics and managed to drag my girlfriend in there. (she surprised me by picking up some manga from the 1$ bin). I managed to track down Punisher The Tyger and Gargoyles #1. Tyger was even better than i had thought. it is just amazing. words fail. (i also picked up some old Demon issues by Ennis, and laughed my ass off). Gargoyles, though, disappointed me. I just love the show (bought it recently on dvd and dug the hell out of it) but this issue was just empty, and the art... well.... it just sucked. maybe things'll pick up. -------- on another completely different note. Psy. Thalia. did you guys get 2Gold and Rogue's e-mail? what do you think? i'll give a shot at reopening my comics forum, but i'd really like to know what you guys think. e-mail me.
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sunday night and im just chilling having some beers and playing some halo with my boys. just multiplayer stuff tho but heath i appraciate the tips on campaign. i started slowing down and im seeing a lot more stuff i was missing.willy man i saw POTC last weekend and i loved it especially the creature effects on davy jones and his men. tell me that shit was not badass!!the onely downer was i had a couple of douchebag kids being cocks right behind me but im over it.its the price u pay for going to the movies on opening weekend.on comics-i just picked up the first 2 ex machina trades of course because of the column and GODDAMN! that is a good fucking book!im giving it kal's highest recomendation! i cant wait for COMIC CON!!!! if i get approched by any of the @$$holes or even u TBers we are having drinks! first round is on your boy kal!
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He once helped Joaquin Phoenix out of a burning vehicle. And then he exploded. And then he grew out of some poop he left unflushed at the X Mansion's ba
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Either of you XB Live goons download the LOST PLANET demo? The screenshots in EGM looked killer.
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I'm not an XB Live goon! (I would be though) I'm old school son! I got the demo from my OXM Magazine and it friggin rocks! It moves even better than it looks and that's saying something. The way the character jumps and the snow and the explosions and the big fuckin alien bugs - it's bad ass, Shig.
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the giant chain gun that you can detatch from the mech you can also use and walk around with like Drake and Vasquez from Aliens
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And maybe a PS3 just for Heavenly Sword. Sigh.
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Do you go to the other parts of this website? I say this because I find that Herc is so annoying and so bad at what he does... it's damn near ruining my experience knowing that he exists on the same planet that I do. I love his response to the question of the ten best films about America with "I hate America". No sense of irony in that statement did I detect. I like most every reviewer on here... except for Wheelie over there.
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Yeah, it looks cool. But does it have a fraky little remote that doubles as both a gun, AND a samurai sword? Red Steel, baby. Wii will pwn your soulz, suxxors!
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it does indeed fucking rock! i cant wait til next year to be able to play it. it is so imppresive graphically that screenshots really dont do it justice. you really have to see it in motion to appreciate the realism of the graphics. and the gameplay is awesome as well. shig u need a 360 man! need it! ***and willy i read other parts of the site but i always prefer this tb and this column. herc seemed ok last i read him. what did he do again?
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I try to stay away from the TV portions of this site because #1) TV sucks for the most part, and #2) I can't stand the 3 pagelengths of Ads at the bottom of every column.
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Word from E3 (re: EGM) was that it blew. Which sucks. But maybe they're wrong. I don't really care, cause there's enough else that will make me first in line to get a Wii. Plus, developers and high-name creators are flocking to it because of the innovative possibilities and relatively low development costs. I hear Hideo Kojima especially is a fan. (Hence Snake in the new smash bros)
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EGM is the anti-christ. THey shat upon the Saturn. They shat upon the DC. They shat upon the GC. If it's not PS3 or Xbox 360 (i.e. the two companies lining their pockets with ad $) then they will take any opportunity to rip it. That being said, the Big N admitted that the settings for the wiimote at the E3 showing we not the best that they could do, and that the games should run better at launch. This kind of double speak is to be expected, but since Big N has YET to fail me, I'll give them the benefit of the doubt. Also, don't get me wrong, I think the 360 is a great machine, and as soon as it moves down to a high stratuspheric price, I'll be obtaining one. It's just the the Wii is going to DEBUT at a normal price tag. Not only that, but apperantly the control scheme and hardware have inspired the notoriously slothful EA to redesign their Wii releases instead of just porting them like the will continue to do for the other consoles. I expect the Wii to perform much the same as the Game Cube. Consistantly labeled as the distant third in a race that it's not even running. Plus, I don't thin kthe PS3 nor the 360 will turn a profit console wise for Sony or Micro. Sure, they'll make their money in other ways, (XboxLive for one will OWN my wallet, I know this) but the consoles will be a loss-leader just like this gens "big black boxes". Don't get me going on games people. I simply cannot shut up about them. Frankly, I don't want to. /endpearlsofwisdom
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ive seent the youtube of the dude playing the game and it looks fucking amazing dont get me wrong. im still not buying a wii. im pretty well hooked on my 360 and can see that the slate of games coming up will keep me hooked.ill just play with your wii shig
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though it saddens me...my mondays aren't as fun without a bit of kiefer action.
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Anyone wanna tell me when there's a definite date for the new Legend of Zelda game coming out? And is it a definite that I have to buy a Wii to get it?
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Twilight Princess is slated to the firm date of "Fall 2006". It will more than likely coencide with the Wii launch, coming out a week or two earlier for the Game Cube. So, no you won't NEED a Wii to play it, but...I mean c'mon.
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You totally said that, Kal-El! Heh. Man, Shig, I never thought you'd take, or even think about the plunge of buying a 360. But, I'm telling ya, it's owning right now. As for the PS3? Fuck that thing up it's unholy overpriced and underwhelming looking 'realtime' gameplay ass. Seriously. Who in their right mind is going to pay that much for a video game system when you can get a 360 with the same or better looking graphics? Plus, Sony's been hit one after the other with bad press releases like ** http://tinyurl.com/hyhbn ** all of those including games costing $100 a peice (Haa!!!), BluRay chip delays, etc. Ahh, fuck the PS3.
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i did totally say that and i didnt even catch the double meaning until i went back and read it.im such a closet case! anyways i agree about the ps3.from what ive read and the price quotes that have come out its an interesting concept but it seems like its not being executed very well. and im not dropping 600.00 bucks on a new system. 100.00 a game? fuck that!
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So....I took a toon from 0-20 in 13 and then had to delete it as it was on a 14 day trial. So....I re-created him on my permanent account friday night. So.....from 0-13 in less than 48 hours....So....God I need a friggin' life......
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and fuck mondays
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I dinna gitno e-mail. Whudditsay?
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I like it.
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And Psy, having a life isn't all it's cracked up to be.. *hangs head and sighs*
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I lost it. FUUUUUUUUUUCK FUCK FUCK FUCKITY FUCK SHIT FUCK IT UP ITS STUPID FUCKING ASS I HATE IT ARGH!!! Getting a goddamn "Special" Lost episode next week which means we're getting a fucking retelling of the shit that's gone down since the last Special fucking Lost episode which was like 5 episodes ago. Look, who gives a !!!SHIT!!! if some fucking moron missed some episode because he/she's too FUCKING STUPID to catch the re runs on twesday and sunday and on monday RIGHT BEFORE THE NEW EPISODE!!!. GOD I HATE PEOPLE FROM VENEZUELA!!!!! I WISH THEY WOULD ALL DROWN IN SHIT!!! FUCK YOU STUPID AXN MOTHERFUCKERS I HATE YOU ALL SO BFUCKING BAD FUCK FUCK SHIT FUCK YOU UP YOUR STUPID VENEZUELAN ASS YOU STUPID FUCKING FUCK FUCK YOU CUNT ARGHHHHH!
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And how come the one thing I actually have heard about in the World Cup (the infamous French head butt) is the only thing the you World Cup watchers haven't mentioned? That head butt was crucial!
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I mean everyone was there to see Zidane's last game as he was retiring and shit, and suddenly he goes all Hulk Smash on the Italian guy (i'm sure Justin remembers who it was) and gets a red card. I mean what the fuck Zidane! What the fuck.
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Weak.
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made for interesting television. it was sad to see a good player do something like that. but man tell me your not going to try that next time u get into it with someone.
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"I kill you with my head!!!" as Conan has been saying.
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LOL! Is that a Conan O'Brien joke about Zidane? Man i should watch Conan again.
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That Zidane looks just like Xavier AND has a move the Prof. could certainly use?
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since he's played with two teams i fucking hate with a passion...juventus and real madrid...though juventus got relegated for match fixing...hilarious...for those who aren't down with relegation...think it as if the k.c. royals finish bottom record wise they are related to triple a baseball with a team from the triple taking their place...or if let's say the oakland raiders suck so badly they get relegated to play in the cfl (canadian football league) and what not...anyway....zindane has a thuggish streak though the player he head butter...MARCO "I HATE YOU SO MUCH" MATERAZZI is a fuggin' thung and a cheat...i've hated him for a long time and he plays for inter milan who i hate plenty as well...i dunno waht shocked me more...colombia not making the world cup again or materazzi actually playing well...see you in four years boy...vale you see our country is going to bid for the 2014 world cup since we messed up the 1986 one leaving mexico to replace us.
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Jul 17, 2006 10:54:15 PM CDT
damn that is atrocious spelling...relegated not related
by blackthought
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grabbing the camera and head butting it and yelling, "I kill you with my head!!!" I love it. I miss him doing the Walker Texas Ranger clips. Those rock.
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Psy, e-mail me at snoro223@hotmail.com and i'll e-mail you back. i've been wanting to talk to you privately for a little whiles now. And Thalya also, please do e-mail me, but don't worry, no pressure. you guys are family to me and you know it.
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Did Arkhangelsk just disown me? Talk about harsh.
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sorry, but i don't recognize your name. if you're from the old gang (chickenmonkey? BILN? Capn Chaos? Enigma?) please e-mail me too
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Everybody play with my Wii!!!
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the World Cup. Vale, bt, I love you guys, but futbol (note the attempt at being respectful with the spelling and shit) is like watching flys fuck. Technically it should be kinda interesting, but who the fuck knows what's going on. It's like rugby, but I like rugby better because some team in New Zealand has the unmitigated GALL to call themselves the "All-Blacks". I don't even think they're all black players. Silly forigners, what would you all do without the guiding, helping hand the big brother U.S.A. provides? Probably follow another country off a cliff most likely. Don't worry though, Uncle Sam is watching out for ya'. *HUGS and puppies* ;p (by the way, I just ingested another round of "make better", so wackiness may ensue.)
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Umm I don't know where you're coming from dude, because from where I'm standing EGM has always given the big N a fair shake. Whenever I read a mainstream press article about gaming, they fail to even mention Nintendo, but it seem that EGM gives them equal time. They've covered the Wii pretty well, and they friggin love the DS. Look at the E3 grades for the 3 companies they gave: Nintendo ranked highest. They also gave RE:4 game of the year last year. Hell they even gave a GBA game "Drill Dozers" game of the month.
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but Big N has dominated the handheld market since it's inception. I mean even the AWE-FUCKING-SOME Neo Geo Pocket went down before the mighty GameBoy. So, if they tried to crap on the handhelds, they'd lose cred. Same with RE4. Game was too fucking good. But it's not even the reviews that I'm talking about. Hell, the reviewers are geeks just like us, and they want the best games to win no matter the system. I'm talking about the coverage. They never gave the GC the kind of full scale BJ that they gave the XB and the PS2. They did dig the N64, which was...odd. But they "no sold" the Saturn, and the Dreamcasts coverage was middling at best.
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Hands down (from all reports) took Sony and Micros lunch money at E3. They have to report that, and since the Wii has all the buzz right now, they're gonna cover it and sell Mags. Talk to me in a years time, when all three systems are out, and then see how much comparative coverage the Wii gets. I garauntee it'll be a game every 3 months, IF that.
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So I can't really comment on their coverage of the 64 or even the GC. I'm just saying, flipping though these days it seems pretty dang balanced to me. I guess we will see in a year but right now I can't see much changing drastically. Maybe you should read Nintendo Power? But yeah Wii cleaned up at E3. Game critics assoc. gave it best of show, and best sports title (wii sports) and best driving title (excite truck). Fuck you madden!
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Hey Shig, don't get me wrong. I'm not a Nintendo fanboy. I HATED the N64. I hated it with much venom. Almost as much as I hate Sony now. No, I'm just pissed that because of EGM and they're ilk, if it's not Sony or Micro (I love my Xbox by the way), then "it doesn't matter."
Yeah, and I concur. Fuck Madden and EA. May they burn in the bowels of all nine hells on their way to their much deserved fate. Tucked deeply into the crevace of the devils nutsack. Choke on Demon semen and be in anguish!
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I mean, I even have a Madden game ('05). I like playing it too. But I really can't understand why someone would buy every single year over and over. I guess if you were really into football...? http://tinyurl.com/kqf35 ok I WANT
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I'm tripping out! Mushrooms dipped in acid..................
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every single year. I need more to get me to buy a now $60 game than a 'hit stick' or 'improved running game.' Fug that. I'm in the camp that believes there should be an upgrade every year and a 'brand spankin new' tagline about every 5 years or so. *** Turtle, no love for GlodenEye? Mario Kart 64? Shadows of the Empire? *** Hey, Shig, you know that Resident Evil 5 is going to be on the 360 right? And then there's the zombie game were you can kill everything with anything. Oh and some little game called Halo 3 is coming soon. I'm trying my best to get you to take the plunge. *** I hear Microsoft is going to get into the iPod and handheld gaming race wiht one device this fall. I haven't heard anything else though.
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Zelda OoT, Zelda MM...there are lots of good games on 64. Sure they should have gone with discs but I don't really care that much. *** Heathen you know the way to my heart: zombies. But there is a brand new Resident Evil coming to Wii too! Imagine picking up a hammer and using the wiimote to smite zombie brains!!
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The last time I was somewhat up-to-date on the video games. I think EGM hit its peak around issue 100, when they did the "100 Best Video Games" or something, and Tetris got first and Super Mario 3 got second. It's strange that someone that was so into video games in elementary through early high school can be so indifferent to them now. I just feel that the hobby blew up and I'm so damn far behind...
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1) Chicken Monkey?! 2) There is a reason futbol is the most popular game all over the world (ALL OVER THE WORLD!!!), gentlemen, and the reason is this: It's simply the best (i bet you all thought the reason would be cooler). 3) How much does a 360 cost in the US of A? I promised myself i'd never ever buy anything that wasn't Playstation related, but the 360 costs like all the money i'll never have here in Colombia and you guys are complaining the PS3's too expensive? Pay heed yeh talkbacker, because this is a moment you'll want to remember: Fuck the PS3!
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Sorry bout that.
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$300 for the "core system", $400 for the "platinum" which has um a 20Gig Hard Drive and some wonky HD output or something. And that's one controller and no games.
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that's very expensive for me too.
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The 360 in Colombia costs about 480 dollars and i doubt it has the extra shit. 300 sounds sweet tho'. Question: Can you play the original Halo in the 360? Halo is the only XBOX game i've ever played and i fuckin' loved it.
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http://tinyurl.com/rmzs6
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I think there's also a list on XBOX's website for all the games you can play on the 360 that have a patch. And sure, the 360 is still expensive, but compared to the PS3 and all it's bad press? Pfff. Wii might have taken best in show at E3, but the one thing people said about the 360 was that it was really shaping into a solid system for game players AND developers. Also, three words
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made me want to jump in the warnagler and drive to buy an n64! but really the 64 was good fucking times indeed. that and dreamcast are always going to have a special place in my xbox green heart.vale it does play halo 1 and 2 but u need the xbox hard drive to do it.i highly recomend the xbox 360 tho.
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It may not be tearing the internet apart, but it Dave's laptop got cut in half by one of Vroom's samurai swords. Fuckin' federal government, requiring everyone who's an @$$hole to register. Half the crew is in favor and the rest of us are on the run. I think it was Bug that set the self-destruct sequence on the @$$hole clubhouse, which simply means locking the liquor cabinet and waiting for Humphrey to show up. We made it out to my secret stash of unregistered weaponry in the Mojave before the first of Black Heliocopters showed up. They weren't much of a problem, as it turns out that Superhero is very handy with a SAM-7 (who knew?). Right now, we're working on some identity theft (call me Musthapha Gomez) then we'll gather our forces for the big Luau. I'm hoping we can find a safe house in the mean time. We're arguing whether we should pull a home invasion of the Cog Mansion...some of us say it would alienate potential allies, others say it would give us access to sofas and game systems, and I say...I say:"Do they have a smoking area and is their bar stocked with Herradura or Patron?"
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because if you attempt a hostile invasion we'll kick your asses, followed by a series of seriously severe headbutts.
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We'll take our chances and count on you having an understanding nature and spirit of anarchy. Besides, it's the Marvel way.
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we even have kryptonian liquors and of course the kegs of asgardian mead!
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You don't want to compromise your vision or mobility or risk injury to yourself. By the time you and an opponent are close enough for a headbutt to take place, yer opponent better already be down, Mis-ter, dew yew read me! Now, get out thar and wade thru that fuckin' swamp with a full pack!
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Jul 18, 2006 3:58:08 PM CDT
I find it funny that even when they are fuckin fighting
by engineer_at_peac
Soccer players do not use their hands at all. Did he ever think to just punch the guy?
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TheRealChickenMonkey. Or OwlBear for that matter.
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It seems Ark has fallen for my cheeky little ruse (heavy british accent).
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be careful for all the secret passages
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Slumber party! *whacks Buzz with a pillow*
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I'll be bringing the best damn weed ya ever smoked....
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*ahh* no hitting hitting in the ear!
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So sue me. You can bring pussy, tho'. I like eating pussy.
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Zucchini bread of some kind because,ha ha, isn't that a cute way of reffering to child molestation or whatever the hell it's supposed to mean? (Still pissed i'm not getting a new Lost episode on monday)
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...just because it's at gunpoint doesn't mean we can't all be friends. I mean, we'll bring beer. It's just that when the government says ya gotta register and half the group is trying to kill the other, ya can't exactly check into the Ramada Inn (especially after what we did to the buffet that time). Let's not call it a slumber party. Dudes call 'em sleepovers. It'll be a sleepover with guard duty, pizza, and claymores.
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all we need is a fat dude in red and its christmas!
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"I want to make CSI porno," she'd said, all in white and green, morgue colours. Green lips on my cock as I lay on a metal table. Why the hell not, I'd said, and now I arched under her mouth as I felt the CK1 come on -- cocaine in liquid ketamine, injected and bringing on mild conscious paralysis for the dead-body look.
My arms and legs were useless as she mounted me. I couldn't speak as she took the bonesaw off the instruments table.
"If there wasn't a murder to solve," she whispered, "it wouldn't be CSI, would it?"
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and warren ellis is welcomed any time at the cogmansion.
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We might have to put the Cog Mansion into orbit again but that's easily done. Can't be too careful with all those government rats around. If things get really hectic and the pentagon starts firing space lasers at us, we could use a boom tube to slip into the bleed. I hear Earth-33 has great tacos. Half of us are wanted by the government anyway. And if they find us, Spectregans can take care of business. The Halo room awaits!
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last!
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Anyone who is interested in The Alberic Heresies #1 based on this review can email me for a free copy. Just send your address to tinatheseamonster@gmail.com. Offer limited to the first 25 folks who write!
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LAST!!!!!!!
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Y the LAST MAN!!
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I proclaim lastest!
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i cast off your attempt with mild amusement...last.
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