Movie News

Do you wanna go POSTAL on Uwe Boll? Here's you chance to stomp his ass into a slimey mudpile!

Published at: June 13, 2006, 2:52 a.m. CST

Hey folks, Harry here... This is kinda hilarious. It reminds me of Scorpio in the original DIRTY HARRY - getting himself all torn up by some bastard, just to get more attention. Uwe Boll is fed up with people criticizing his films and writing reviews of his shi... cinema without at least seeing the excretable assclingers for themselves. And he's decided that he wants to give them a shot at beating the living shit out of him. Or - he's going to beat the living shit out of you.

Not since Joe Louis vs Max Schmeling - has there been so great a bout with a German. Think about it... this is your chance to be Christopher Walken to his Martin Sheen... "The ice... is gonna break!" I'd kill to have Quint battle Boll. I think it would have an amazing Pay-Per-View options. 10 rounds... Quint v Boll. Hell, that shit makes Drago v. Balboa seem like chicken feed.

Towards the end of the filming of Postal, the five most outspoken critics will be flown into Vancouver and supplied with hotel rooms. As a guest of Uwe Boll they will be given the chance to be an extra/stand-in in Postal and have the opportunity to put on boxing gloves and enter a BOXING RING to fight Uwe Boll. Each critic will have the opportunity to bring down Uwe in a 10-bout match. There will be five matches planned over the last two days of the movie. Certain scenes from these boxing matches will become part of the Postal movie. All five fights will be televised on the Internet and will be covered by international press.

To be eligible you must be a critic who has posted on the Internet or have written in magazines/newspapers at least two extremely negative articles in the year 2005. Critics of 2006 will not be considered.

Folks between 140 and 190 pounds, send an email to info@boll.kg.de and help Uwe prove that he isn't a bad filmmaker through physical violence.

Shit. We'll have to put Quint on jello and jump ropes. Seriously though folks... if you have boxing experience and can kick some serious ass... and you've posted negative shit on Uwe Boll over the last few years... well then, here's your chance to end the pain with bloody gloves. For Motivation: Part 1 & Part 2!

Readers Talkback

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  • June 13, 2006, 2:55 a.m. CST

    I have quite a few at theloyolan.com

    by Lenny Nero

    Bring it on, Uwe.

  • June 13, 2006, 2:56 a.m. CST

    Boll is solidifying his place in legend with this stunt

    by Mr Brownstone

  • June 13, 2006, 2:58 a.m. CST

    Why not you?!

    by RenoReno

    Why not you, Harry?! I vote for Harry to fight like the corner animation with Uwe, yesss!

  • June 13, 2006, 3 a.m. CST

    HAHAHAHA You've gotta give the man his dues...

    by seppukudkurosawa

    He's taken that J&SB thing one step further. I think we should train Ving Rhames in the "art" of professional criticism and them send him over to the Fatherland to kick some Kraut ass. I actually think Uwe's a funny guy...he's mad as a hatter for actually trying to defend his cine-swill, but at least the guy's got some personality. Which is more than you can say for Bratner, on the other hand.

  • June 13, 2006, 3:06 a.m. CST

    UWE...Universal Wrestling Entertainment...Boll

    by nomihs

    Uwe, put the gloves away and take your lashings like a man...Or at least a sub-par filmmaker who has some kind of mind control device that can convince studio execs. to give him money to make sub-par films. And Harry, you need to go on a diet like RIGHT THE FUCK NOW so you can enter into this fight. You could go all NACHO LIBRE on his ass. Lastly, one has to give him credit, Uwe not Harry, for taking his grieviences to the people.

  • June 13, 2006, 3:08 a.m. CST

    Re: Me fighting Uwe Boll

    by HEADGEEK

    I'm way over-weight in the "weight class" - but mainly - I don't want to fight Uwe. I don't hate his films at the primal level that Quint does. For me - Uwe is entertaining in that train wreck self destruction way. I mean, his films are getting bigger and bigger, even if they continue to blow - and I am absolutely fascinated by it.

  • June 13, 2006, 3:12 a.m. CST

    What a fucktard...

    by Kingdaddy

    Sounds like the douchey clown at the carnival egging people on at the dunk tank. Let's all punch Douchey in the sack by swearing to NEVER see or rent another film of his again...He may respond to a big punch in the taint!!!

  • June 13, 2006, 3:14 a.m. CST

    By the way...

    by Kingdaddy

    Headgeek??? You never respond to my messages...Am I your Uwe Boll???

  • June 13, 2006, 3:26 a.m. CST

    I'd say VERN and FOYWONDER get first dibs.

    by quantum_ken

    I will buy the DVD and paperback adaptation.

  • June 13, 2006, 3:27 a.m. CST

    Suprised you guys never mentioned Uwe's huge lawsuit!

    by Kampbell-Kid

    Apprently the studio he botched Bloodrayne for filed a lawsuit against him for basicly being a bastard of a person in dealing with.

  • June 13, 2006, 3:29 a.m. CST

    Strangest news article in recent memory

    by deanamatronix

    But damn, if Boll doesn't keep things interesting. No interest in his films, but the whole Boll vs The World saga is better than any reality TV programme.

  • June 13, 2006, 3:30 a.m. CST

    He may be a shitty director, But he's got Balls

    by DOGSOUP

    You gotta give him credit. I wont watch his unwatchable shit but the man's got my respect for fighting for the shi...cinema he believes in....

  • June 13, 2006, 3:32 a.m. CST

    Boll a boxer?

    by KCMOSHer

    Some little bit of information masquerading as accurate trivia has bubbled up in the cauldron that is my memory: wasn't Boll a boxer at one point? High school college, something? If true, this is a trap...chances are he's a WAY better fighter than he is a director.

  • June 13, 2006, 3:32 a.m. CST

    Damn. Sorry everyone.

    by quantum_ken

    I'm an idiot. Vern can't do it- for obvious reasons. Might as well have said Han Solo or frickin' James Bond.

  • June 13, 2006, 3:54 a.m. CST

    Boll a boxer!

    by ugerhard

    Uwe Boll: "I boxed 15 years in a club. BAYER LEVERKUSEN, where people like "THE TIGER" Michalczewski or FELIX STURM (lost in Las Vegas fighted also.) I got a spinal cord accident and got a platinum disk in my neck finally.

  • June 13, 2006, 4:07 a.m. CST

    C'mon, Harry...

    by Freddie Mercury

    this challenge was made for you. You think Boll's not calling you out specifically, in a roundabout way? It's got to be you or Drew. Quint is a well-known powder puff. It's time for AICN to fuckin' represent.

  • June 13, 2006, 4:13 a.m. CST

    Can someone kick the shit out of...

    by beefywhore

    Roland Emmerich, Paul Anderson, and Renny Harlin next?

  • June 13, 2006, 4:23 a.m. CST

    *WARNING* WHATEVER YA DO, NEVER...EVER...

    by Shermdawg

    Say Uwe Boll is directing the Metal Gear film, on a gaming website, all hell will break loose! Honestly, I've seen arguements erupt over that subject that make homewrecker and Doc's ongoing saga seem like a friendly spat. It's a extremely touchy subject.

  • June 13, 2006, 4:25 a.m. CST

    I've never seen a movie of his but...

    by TraumReiter

    ...I like how he is fighting for his movies. I should listen to Bach more often!

  • June 13, 2006, 4:30 a.m. CST

    This is great!!!

    by godoffireinhell

    Just absolutely great!!! Never seen more than a trailer for any Boll flick but goddamn that man is an entertainment machine when it comes to his interviews and stuff like this. Love it!

  • June 13, 2006, 4:33 a.m. CST

    lol, wow that was freaky.

    by Shermdawg

    I gots some WWE tracks in my library and when I was reading the posts, the late great Yokozuna's theme came on when I got to Harry's. :P And as far as Harry squaring off against Uwe? I wouldn't mind seeing Harry beat the snot out of Boll, he's asking for it.

  • June 13, 2006, 4:34 a.m. CST

    Harry.

    by HK_Cavalier

    Well, what you just wrote in this talk back sounds to me like the decrying of Boll, if a little even handed. Don't use your middling hatred or morbid fascination of his work as an excuse to not lose weight Harry. Trim down mofo, and get in the ring. You'll feel better for having lost those truckloads of instant chimichangas from around your middle. Eye of the tiger, baby.

  • June 13, 2006, 4:42 a.m. CST

    Height

    by HK_Cavalier

    I just looked it up Harry, you're 5'11", or 6' if you insist. I'm 6'3" and weigh 195. You can do it if you drop a quick 410.

  • June 13, 2006, 4:44 a.m. CST

    Of course Harrys not in the weight class, but...

    by Shermdawg

    A guy can dream can't he? And I saw the YouTube clips on IGN earlier this year. I remember how the guy interviewing him was waaay more into his dinner than Boll's bullshit. (Gawd dang Gangrel had a kickass theme!)

  • June 13, 2006, 4:44 a.m. CST

    Dammit!

    by DerLanghaarige

    Too bad, that I'm one of the few people in the world, who defend Da Boll! But I hope they put the fights out on DVD.

  • June 13, 2006, 4:53 a.m. CST

    Richard"The Dick"Roeper vs. Uwe"The Hack"Boll

    by Shermdawg

    CLASH OF THE CENTURY!!! (Actually, I would've like to see Gene Shalit face him, but that ain't happenin.)

  • June 13, 2006, 5:16 a.m. CST

    Rocky Bollboa

    by DocPazuzu

    This is possibly the greatest thing I have ever heard of. How fucking funny would it be if Dr. Boll kicked everyone's asses? The man has nothing to lose because everyone hates him anyway, but any critic who steps in the ring with him risks losing every shred of credibility or dignity if Dr. Boll hands his ass to him. Yet again, the master of schlock has increased the level of my respect for him. You have got to love a stunt like this. Respect the Boll!

  • June 13, 2006, 5:19 a.m. CST

    Knowles vs. Ebert

    by Freddie Mercury

    WHO YOU GOT?

  • June 13, 2006, 5:19 a.m. CST

    Dream?

    by HK_Cavalier

    A guy can dream? Man, if Harry lost the weight to fight Boll he'd lose the only advantage he has, the advantage of massive weight differential. A skinny Harry would be exactly what we expect. A skinny movie geek with nothing to offer a fight except girl slaps and high pitched shrieks. Poor, Harry.

  • June 13, 2006, 5:20 a.m. CST

    by foreignerbelt

    I think that's the chick from ign weekly who has some big tits and is annoying enough to warrant a hate fuck. Boll looks like he could beat some ass to be honest. But that still doesn't make up for hours of of pure movie shit. I kind of want some fucking thai food now.

  • June 13, 2006, 5:22 a.m. CST

    I totally agree!!!!!

    by HK_Cavalier

    Thai food would be pretty good around now.

  • June 13, 2006, 5:23 a.m. CST

    GO UWE GO!

    by CuervoJones

    I love this guy, he

  • June 13, 2006, 5:23 a.m. CST

    Well, Uwe never was one for restraint, so...

    by Ribbons

    ...tell Quint to protect the unmentionables if he gets into the ring with the guy.

  • June 13, 2006, 5:25 a.m. CST

    No, no, no...

    by Shermdawg

    My dream was that Harry was allowed in the contest at his current weight. I'd never want Harry to get all Jared up on us.

  • June 13, 2006, 5:30 a.m. CST

    Harry.

    by HK_Cavalier

    Well, Shermdawg. I sorta, kinda, agree with you. A fat Harry, is a funny Harry. Everyone loves a fatty, they're funny. Ha, Ha. But, not so funny when he has a cardiac episode at the next QT screening. That might take the romantic spank off of being a great big fatso who reviews movies.

  • June 13, 2006, 5:39 a.m. CST

    Eye of the tiger, Uwe...

    by DocPazuzu

    ...eye of the tiger! I'm still laughing about this whole thing. Genius.

  • June 13, 2006, 5:39 a.m. CST

    Do they sell tickets for the fight?

    by DerLanghaarige

    This would be another way to get money for his movies ;) Go Uwe! Critics are pussies! (Uhm...except the guys from AICN *activates ass-kissing-mode in 3...2...1...*)

  • June 13, 2006, 5:50 a.m. CST

    This stunt was old 15 years ago

    by BannedOnTheRun

    When Axl Rose did it.

  • June 13, 2006, 5:51 a.m. CST

    BannedOnTheRun

    by DocPazuzu

    But not as funny.

  • June 13, 2006, 5:53 a.m. CST

    Borat Movie Trailer!!

    by OB Wan Afghani

    Borat Movie Trailer!! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cOTpfkfS-2k

  • June 13, 2006, 5:55 a.m. CST

    Does AICN backdate reviews?

    by BannedOnTheRun

    I've never seen an Uwe Bowel film (or spelled his name -- sir, you have a severe case of Uwe Bowel syndrome), but I'd trash the guy for a paid trip to Vancouver. A boxing match couldn't be any worse than luggage check.

  • June 13, 2006, 5:56 a.m. CST

    Holy crap...did you see the trailer for Dungeon Seige?

    by Lezbo Milk

    Good God did that look like a shitfest! I'm kinda with Harry, it's kinda interesting to see how big a train wreak this guy can make...and still keep drumming up money and actors to work for him. It is a type of entertainment...a sad twisted type of entertainment, but entertainment none the less.

  • June 13, 2006, 6:11 a.m. CST

    Is there any

    by Giant Ape Balls

    we could get Bareras or Ricky Hatton to write a review?

  • June 13, 2006, 6:16 a.m. CST

    To slash a Hack...

    by Agent sith

    after the watching 2 of my favorite horror game franchisces (house of the dead & bloodrayne)get butchered on cinema, i could just cut boll's fingers off (sharkey's machine style) so that he may never get his hands on another videogame-to-movie project. Jeez,how does he get away with it? oh,and beefywhore..i did like resident evil for what it was,so i'm not quick to put Paul WorthlesS Anderson in the ring,but i strongly agree in regards to roland Emmrich.(universal soldier couldv'e been much better and ID4 just sucked Bush Balls.let's see.... "i got's to git me one o' these" "now that's what i call a close encounter". ahh,put em both in the ring Battle royal style!

  • June 13, 2006, 6:21 a.m. CST

    HOLY CRAP! WEIRD AL WROTE A SONG FOR TALKBACKERS!!!

    by Shermdawg

    www.weirdal.com for the free download. I smell a Grammy!

  • June 13, 2006, 6:33 a.m. CST

    WoW

    by HK_Cavalier

    NO, not World of Warcraft. Actually, WoW! I'm surprised at the defense of both Boll and Harry. Boll sucks, it's true. His movies are garbage and I wish they were never made - that bit with Lokken's tits in Bloodrayne, well.....- much like many others around here, i'm sure. Boll obviously takes the hatchet to anything he tries to adapt. I know Boll reeks - unlike Lezbo Milk who thinks he wreaks with a train or something, a piece of english i'm not familiar with - as do we all. But, the stand around attitude to Harry's weight? I can't put up with it. We need to make sure this man loses weight now if we are to enjoy this site any longer. Harry, you will soon have an episode crossing the road if you are not careful, start on the tofu my man. Or at the very least, start on the non-cheesesteaks.

  • June 13, 2006, 6:59 a.m. CST

    fuuuuuuuuck!

    by Massawyrm 1

    I meet all of the qualifications except that I was only able to shit on Boll once last year! God damnit!

  • June 13, 2006, 7:02 a.m. CST

    Let me be clear, when I said...

    by Shermdawg

    "I'd never want Harry to get all Jared up on us." It didn't mean I don't want him to lose the weight one day. It's just a.I don't want him losing it all before my dream showdown with Boll. and b.I wouldn't want him to lose it like Jared. C'mon guys, we've all heard the rumors......HE HAS AIDES!!!

  • June 13, 2006, 7:24 a.m. CST

    Why are you giving this talentless hack publicity?

    by hiperaktiv

    Ignore him and he will go away.

  • June 13, 2006, 7:55 a.m. CST

    Uncle Frank....

    by UncleEthan

    In my humble opinion...someone should send an actual ringer up there...like Uncle Frank Stallone. While uncle Frank might be a little out of the weight class I've seen video of him boxing the shit out of a couple of d-list celebs who thought they wanted to be boxers....then puffing on a cigerette afterwards. Seriously. Uncle Frank would stomp the shit out of Boll...could be funny.

  • June 13, 2006, 8:01 a.m. CST

    hiperaktiv

    by Shermdawg

    Who were you referring to Boll or Weird Al?

  • June 13, 2006, 8:05 a.m. CST

    Well crap in a hat!

    by Childe Roland

    If only I didn't agree with Boll that folks should either see his movies or shut up about them, I could've had the opportunity to actually meet this guy (who's become sort of a side fascination of mine over the last year or so...I honestly think he's the modern equivalent of Ed Wood and his films will be a guilty pleasure of students in about 15 years) and perhaps get in a good fight as well. That tears it. I'm going to act like more of an asshole from now on.

  • June 13, 2006, 8:05 a.m. CST

    Mickey Rourke?

    by brycemonkey

    He'd be a great ringer UncleEthan non? I hope AICN has links to these fights when/if they happen. I bet Boll calls it off when he sees the 5 monsters that turn up to fight him. "I have a heart condition. If you hit me, it's murder." - Ja?!

  • June 13, 2006, 8:13 a.m. CST

    What an entertainer

    by DannyOcean01

    His films may be shit, but you have to give props to the guy for being a blast to listen, read and now beat on.

  • June 13, 2006, 8:34 a.m. CST

    fuck that pansy glove bullshit

    by Uncooked_Meat

    I'd only do it if I could go at the fucker bareknuckles. Or with a shovel.

  • June 13, 2006, 8:49 a.m. CST

    no question,uwe has balls,lol!

    by TheResident

    and i agree, this contest has "i want the AICN guys!" all over it

  • June 13, 2006, 9:07 a.m. CST

    he's either very smart or very dumb...

    by bib fortuna

    Challenging film geek critics to a fight when 99% are over his weight limit.

  • June 13, 2006, 9:07 a.m. CST

    Technically doesn't this mean he can be legally killed?

    by Horseflesh

    I mean boxing matches have waivers and such... if someone were to beat him to death they wouldn't be legally held responsible for it, would they? It's a fun thought, and I would actually pay to see it.

  • June 13, 2006, 9:17 a.m. CST

    Poetic Justice

    by alienindisguise

    Screw a boxing match!...I'd just love to smash a film camera over his head and look down at the rolls of film draped over his busted grill. This rapist of film deserves no less.

  • June 13, 2006, 9:32 a.m. CST

    Brycemonkey...

    by UncleEthan

    Excellent suggestion...although oneof the celebs that Frank beat down was Mickey himself.

  • June 13, 2006, 9:34 a.m. CST

    And Boll won.

    by JackPumpkinhead

    He got attention. He got publicity. He even got praise from some idiots. That's all he wanted, that's what he got. By the way, he doesn't give a shit about his "movies", he's only interested in that German law bug that allows investors to make money on a film's box-office loss. That's all there's to Boll - a tax scam. Oh, learn to pronounce his name. There's no "ewe" anywhere in it.

  • June 13, 2006, 9:54 a.m. CST

    Boll is a Genius

    by cerebulon

    Mark my words.... one day people will look back at Uwe's life and career and realize what a showman he really is. There will probably be a "Man in the Moon" style movie done about him after he fakes his own death filming "Pitfall" the movie at the Grand Canyon... in accordance with the prophecy.

  • June 13, 2006, 9:55 a.m. CST

    The secret of Boll's success!!

    by bigdickmcgee

    German Tax credits. That's right, German tax payers are subsidizing Boll in a headache-inducing scheme of ludicrous complexity whereby foreign producers get a portion of their budgets kicked back to them, and German corporations make more money if the film fails by writing the losses off on their tax bill. Ask Stephen Hawking how it actually works, but that's the reason Dr. Boll keeps getting funded. You see, if the films 'make' money, German companies wind up paying more taxes....or something like that. So the system is designed to produce the shittiest product imaginable. And you have to agree they succeeded with Dr. Boll.

  • June 13, 2006, 9:56 a.m. CST

    Can someone define the word "fucktard"?

    by Doc_Strange

    What is a "tard" anyway? Seriously, I only hear that word in geek forums.

  • June 13, 2006, 10:03 a.m. CST

    Fucktard (from Dr. Johnson's dictionary)

    by bigdickmcgee

    A combination of "fuck" and "retard". Shorthand for "fucking retard". As in "what, you liked/hated _____ movie?? You're a fucking retard!" Can be shortened to "What, you liked/hated ______?? Fucktard!" Hope this helps.

  • June 13, 2006, 10:19 a.m. CST

    Boll specifically challenged Quentin Tarantino and...

    by bigdickmcgee

    Roger Avary. In my opinion, Tarantino, who bitch-slapped producer Don Murphy once in a restaurant, might actually go for it. Boll is a midget, so lanky Quentin has the reach on him. Boll will have to go in close to the body and pound Quentin's beergut. Q could cheat and headbutt him with that giant head. Boll could hunker down and punch him in the balls. But Q could grab him in a headlock and give him one of those reverse backkicks to the ass, then lock his face into his armpit and Boll would pass out.

  • June 13, 2006, 10:20 a.m. CST

    Boll is a genius...

    by rbatty024

    of advertising. I have to give that guy some credit for coming up with such a looney campaign. Now, if he only could put as much thought into his crap circus films.

  • June 13, 2006, 10:20 a.m. CST

    I hope he wins all 5 matches

    by BitterMan23

    GO BOLL

  • June 13, 2006, 10:22 a.m. CST

    Not enough...

    by CellarDoor

    Sure, i'd enjoy fully beating the man but i'm in the middle of training a sperm whale to rape him. Give me another year or so. I'll post the video on Youtube, no worries.

  • June 13, 2006, 10:25 a.m. CST

    For those of you who complain about the German Tax Hole

    by DerLanghaarige

    Boll is not the only one who use it. In fact, almost EVERY big (and some smaller) Hollywood film is produced with it (including Lord Of The Rings!). Check the endcredits of your favourite Hollywoodflick, if you find at the end a KG. ;)

  • June 13, 2006, 10:29 a.m. CST

    lol Cellar...

    by brycemonkey

    good job I have my own office so people don't see me laughing at this TB. (Ditto looking at nsfw pix/downloading music/etc. etc.) I think it's a great ploy and quite amusing that he recognises the bile directed towards him. Sounds like his mouth is writing cheques his body can't cash...

  • June 13, 2006, 10:40 a.m. CST

    Come on Quint!

    by Archive

    You're the best... around! Ain't nobody gonna get you down!

  • June 13, 2006, 10:47 a.m. CST

    WHAT NEXT?

    by maximusdecimus

    I've never seen any of his films. Are they that bad? I think anyone who comes from a country where David Hasselhoff is their biggest selling rockstar deserves a good shit-kicking. I'm in!!!!

  • June 13, 2006, 10:53 a.m. CST

    You know what should happen?

    by Angry Mean Panda

    Whenever the winners get in the ring with Uwe, kick him in the knee and then go MMA on his ass. Can we claim that Matt Hughes is a film critic?

  • June 13, 2006, 10:57 a.m. CST

    This isn't too complicated...

    by LeFlambeur

    Just have Mike Tyson write a review, publish it, take him of his medication, tell him Uwe ate some of his pigeons, and turn him loose in the ring.

  • June 13, 2006, 10:58 a.m. CST

    Harry, try and get Uwe Boll to go to San Diego for..

    by R.C. the "Wise"

    the Comic Con. He can make his challenge there. I'll take him on and beat the shit into him in the name of all that is indecent in cinema today. I'll do it for the fans, the critics, but most of all, I'll do it because he's an ass!

  • June 13, 2006, 10:58 a.m. CST

    don't fo it AICN!

    by Buster Gonads

    Dudes, I just looked up a picture of Herr Boll and he looks like a thug. I am not 100% sure of this but my bet is you AICN lot are over weight and probably only throw punches on your computer games. Nothing wrong with that, but if you go in the ring with this dude, he will hurt you! Don't go guys, I like the site too much and you'll be beaten to death.

  • June 13, 2006, 11:10 a.m. CST

    I'll volunteer to train our candidate on...

    by JAGUART

    Mike Tyson's Punch-Out for the NES!!

  • June 13, 2006, 11:43 a.m. CST

    Boll = Assclown

    by finky089

    Why bother? It would be far more insulting to the hack for no one to take him up on his lame "challenge" simply because we could care less about him. Time to move the rest of this conversation over to the Aquaf@g TB.

  • June 13, 2006, 11:43 a.m. CST

    Quint training in New Zealand Right Now

    by docfalken

    I've been hearing things that Quint has decided to study the muy thai discipline and plans to not only kick Boll's ass, but will also insert a stack of Ben Kingsley's films on DVD, directly into his anus.

  • June 13, 2006, 11:51 a.m. CST

    Why does everyone hate Boll so much?

    by rbatty024

    Sure, his films suck, but they fall into the rare category of so bad they're funny. I'll admit to grabbing a six pack with a few friends, renting an Uwe Boll film, and going all "Mystery Science Theater" on it. It makes sense to hate Boll if you were a fan of the videogames he adapted. Luckily he has yet to get his claws on any videogames I actually care about.

  • June 13, 2006, 11:56 a.m. CST

    Has the role of the Postal Dude been cast?

    by Immortal_Fish

    Kinda interested since Postal 2 is a guilty pleasure. Get Ryan Reynolds!

  • June 13, 2006, noon CST

    Boll a thug?

    by beefywhore

    That dude is most assuridly not a thug...he is a sawed off little runt with little-man-syndrome who, as it turns out, is not a very good film-maker. any of the regulars on this site (geek or not) could take this joker in a fair fight...in fact, most of the regulars on this site could take out Little-Man blind-folded...

  • June 13, 2006, 12:02 p.m. CST

    Almost anybody can apply

    by moviemaniac-7

    Since no one in their right mind can appreciate the works of the man... Saw Alone in the Dark the other day and I wondered if a movie could be as bad as its reputation. And yes, Boll KG succeeded gloriously. I produced shit better than that.

  • June 13, 2006, 12:03 p.m. CST

    Is Gary Coleman in it? He was in the game.

    by Shermdawg

  • June 13, 2006, 12:07 p.m. CST

    How mature.

    by I Dunno

    The guy makes movies that even he has to admit obviously suck ass, funded by a German tax loophole and he wants to beat up critics who don't like them? He should aknowledge the fact that there are hundreds of filmmakers more talented than he who will never reach even his mediocre success and shut the fuck up instead of being antagonistic.

  • June 13, 2006, 12:18 p.m. CST

    BTW Buster Gonads

    by beefywhore

    You were obviously joking..sorry I didn't mean to take that so seriously...its been a long night...

  • June 13, 2006, 12:20 p.m. CST

    Some people should never get close to movies

    by Harold The Great

    And by some people I don't mean Boll, I mean some Talkbackers. Goddamnit, you're a sad bunch of funless bitter people. Uwe Boll is not about good movies. Uwe Boll is a show - a guy who makes money from movies that flop, but he's doing it with style. He built a persona for himself through his shitty adaptations, with the Romanian Hooker stories, and by giving us Michael MAdsen with a mullet. And now he wants to fight it's critics. You may be more talented than him to make movies, but I'm glad you don't. We would watch it, would call it nice, and move on. But you wouldn't be half as fun to discuss, to watch and to bitch about as Uwe Boll. It's about entertainment, and on that, the guy delivers.

  • June 13, 2006, 12:23 p.m. CST

    Uwe Boll makes absolute DRECK for films

    by tripp5

    but i'm willin' to bet that he's a competent boxer of some sort, and will thrash any critic that steps in to a ring with him

  • June 13, 2006, 12:25 p.m. CST

    PLUS, the boxing footage will NOT be for Postal but for

    by tripp5

    his big screen micro budget production of Mike Tyson's Punch-Out, featuring Eminem as Little Mac, Sameul L Jackson as The Doc and Heir Boll his'self taking on the role of Soda Popinski.

  • June 13, 2006, 12:27 p.m. CST

    It's A Trap!

    by fenario80

    For godsakes, don't go!

  • June 13, 2006, 12:29 p.m. CST

    Uwe, thy nutsack will be collected...

    by Doctor_Sin

    and jackboots lodged within thy anal sphincter. Open wide, cupcake. Ownage is upon thee.

  • June 13, 2006, 1:02 p.m. CST

    "Harry and Quint are retards." - Uwe Boll

    by Doctor_Sin

    Harry, you red-headed fucker, get SUMO on his ass. Have Quint take him on octagon-style. Hell, all of AICN should take him on, each with a different fighting style/technique. Which one of you geeks is the ninja!?!? I could see Moriarty going all Savate on Boll - a baguette in one hand, a glass of merlot in the other. Uwe Boll is a buttplug of the lowest order.

  • June 13, 2006, 1:22 p.m. CST

    Sack up, you Pussies!!

    by SouthSide_2010

    C'mon reviewers, here's your chance to vent your frustrations at a piece of shit director who makes bigger piece of shit films. Don't tell me excuses, just drop the weight or pack on the pounds, get in shape and knock this wickprick into the fuckin' stone ages. Sack up gawddammit!!

  • June 13, 2006, 1:45 p.m. CST

    Interesting idea.

    by mattw

    But maybe just making better movies would be easier.

  • June 13, 2006, 1:49 p.m. CST

    "making better movies would be easier"

    by tripp5

    Ha, you would THINK so, wouldnt ya?

  • June 13, 2006, 2:02 p.m. CST

    WTF is wrong with YOU GEEKS

    by antonphd

    Uwe is going to pick the 5 fighters. He's going to pick the weakest 5 he can. These are rigged fights. He can obviously kick the shit out of any geek on the planet, by definition of a geek, but on top of that he's going to pick the weakest of the bunch. Uwe is just being a pussy bully now.

  • June 13, 2006, 2:02 p.m. CST

    Hooray for Boll!

    by fiester

    Let's see that pussy Kevin Smith step up with the same offer.

  • June 13, 2006, 2:03 p.m. CST

    LADIES AND GENTLEMEN - RAGING ERIC "QUINT" VESPE

    by JAGUART

    http://tinyurl.com/fgmdv

  • June 13, 2006, 2:05 p.m. CST

    HK.....

    by savage_henry

    What bit with Lokken's tits in Bloodrayne? Do you see her tits? I MUST KNOW NOW SO I CAN RENT IT ON THE WAY HOME FROM WORK!!!!!!

  • June 13, 2006, 2:11 p.m. CST

    by Rufus

    Someone knock him out. WHY is he making POSTAL into a movie? Anyone but Herr Boll! ANYONE!

  • June 13, 2006, 2:22 p.m. CST

    about this challenge,

    by savage_henry

    I agree with some others on this board. You don't make a challenge like this unless you're pretty fucking sure you will beat the ass of the average individual who steps in the ring with you. Either that, or he's completely insane. Or he's a brilliant self promoter. Or he's a model airplane glue huffer. Take your pick. Still, this has the makings for some outstanding entertainment value. Nerd/critic enters ring with "AICN RULES" t-shirt on, bellows, "this one's for you, fellas", and proceeds to get his grill crumpled by the most vilified man on the site.

  • June 13, 2006, 2:23 p.m. CST

    AICW = Ain't It Cool Wrestling? Next BNAT event?

    by Doctor_Sin

    All filmmakers should annually challenge AICN to a fight. Kevin Smith, Del Toro, QT, all of 'em. AICN should openly throw down the gauntlet and challenge George "The Ranch" Lucas to a five-round grudge match. I envision Harry and George, each slathered in butter, wearing only speedos, body-chucking each other into the floor.

  • June 13, 2006, 2:34 p.m. CST

    savage_henry RE: Lokken's tits

    by Horseflesh

    Yes you do get a good long full view of her eye-baits bouncing around in what has to be one of the most comical sex scenes ever put on film.

  • June 13, 2006, 2:37 p.m. CST

    Seriously, boll would wtfpwn you guys

    by Lucidz

    http://www.bollfans.com/images/Boll%20&%20Reid2.jpg and http://www.ihmagazine.it/imgarticoli/film/dungeon_siege/boll.jpg Face it, this dude would crush your skulls. Sorry geek warriors, you have lost the battle but not the war!

  • June 13, 2006, 2:38 p.m. CST

    i'd love to bloody that fool, fuck him up righteous

    by reckni

    Boll has seriously crossed-over into shameless self-parody. Very, very painful to know it can happen, especially to someone severely lacking talent, yet someone who's willing to drum up any sort of publicity no matter how ridiculous. He is scum.

  • June 13, 2006, 2:42 p.m. CST

    Is this a Boll directed remake

    by KabutoKoji

    to Girlfight? He already worked with Michelle Rodriguez once. She can be his trainer in this one. You know, I'm just saying.

  • June 13, 2006, 2:44 p.m. CST

    Watch this space, Uwe. That's all I'm sayin'.

    by Doctor_Sin

    That pain you feel is your liver collapsing and your intestines swallowing your colon. Boll, peeing blood for a year isn't fun.

  • June 13, 2006, 3:14 p.m. CST

    Harry in all seriousness, you should hire a trainer.

    by Mr. Profit

    I'm not trying to be funny or be a jackass hater. I was always a slimmer guy, but depression set in around 2 years ago and and slowly began to gain weight. By the end of last year I gained a lot of weight. On January 1st 2006 I was 236. I am only 5'11. I resolved to lose weight for 2006 and went on a diet first. I cut everything bad cold turkey and I slimmed down on my own to 200 pounds by the end of March. Then I hired a trainer to help me build muscle. I go to the gym 5 days a week and train with my trainer 4 days a week. I do this every morning at 5AM. I am not a celebrity and have some high priced trainer. I am a regular dude who works in an office (where getting fat is easy) And I do make the sacrifice to pay for this training service as it is beneficial. I am now 175 pounds and my whole appearance has changed for the better. I don't feel hatred toward the summer season any more because I can now wear shit and not feel like a fat bastard in tight clothes. It sounds cliched, but if I can do it and I have virtually no time to do it with my crazy schedule, you can do it easily. You will feel much better about your overall health. Then you can fucking pummel the living shit out of Uwe Boll.

  • June 13, 2006, 3:41 p.m. CST

    I workout in front of the TV

    by Doctor_Sin

    Tai Chi, weights, bench, everything. With goddamn Frodo and Anakin Skywlaker in the background. Well, except for Tai Chi - then I have some sweet-ass Chinese music playing. Here's a tip - put on a Golden Age Jackie Chan film like "Police Story" or "Dragons Forever" while you excersise. You'll slim down just *imagining* you could fall out a window and hit the street.

  • June 13, 2006, 3:44 p.m. CST

    Thanks, Horseflesh.

    by savage_henry

    I might skip the rental if the scene is goofy, I'll probably be able to google an image somewhere instead. Regardless: I must see and judge for myself, and maybe, just maybe, spend some time "thrilling" my member.

  • June 13, 2006, 3:45 p.m. CST

    is he going to film this for his next movie?

    by slappy jones

    EA Boxing.

  • June 13, 2006, 4:02 p.m. CST

    Uwe: I Don't Suck Because I Punch

    by marco527

    Here's what I love. This is being marketed as "Oh, Uwe's finally letting his critics take a swing at him! Ha, ha, what a good sport." But he's a trained boxer--he even directed a documentary about his boxing club. So this isn't a good-natured stunt. He's going to knock five anemic internet guys on their asses, throw up his hands, and say, "SEE! I am a good filmmaker! Their opinions mean nothing because I can punch harder than they can! They couldn't back up their criticism with punches, so I am a winner! Bloodrayne is Oscar-worthy!!" And he'll use that sad justification for the rest of his life. Reminds me of David Brent and Chris Finch on BBC's The Office claiming that they won quiz night because they threw Tim's shoe over the building.

  • June 13, 2006, 4:38 p.m. CST

    RAGING BOLL

    by Agent sith

    meh, i know i can kick this guy's a$$,but he's not really worth the effort unless there's some prize money involved. plus never lose to a german ,they're pretty big on that scatology (taking a shite on their partners.)oh well, i can always continue to disregard him as a legitimate filmaker. better to hit him in the pocket as oppossed to his bald ugly face.

  • June 13, 2006, 4:42 p.m. CST

    Uwe Boll needs to start reading comics...

    by godhatesyou

    .....instead of playing video games. I think he would make a good superhero movie....not a big hero, perhaps a minor one. The Question or Blue Devil or something.

  • June 13, 2006, 4:44 p.m. CST

    create a talkbacker, "Crying Anus"...

    by Kiki Bridges

    have him hate on the Prequels, Tom Rothman, and recent Doctor Who. Have him refer to Uwe Boll as pound for pound the worst director in the world. Have Uwe take the bait. Crying Anus shows up as...Bernard Hopkins. The Executioner.

  • June 13, 2006, 4:53 p.m. CST

    Uwe would make a good Superman movie.

    by godhatesyou

    But there are 2 conditions. Keep the original Superman suit and the original music. Just imagine.....it would be fucking awesome.

  • June 13, 2006, 6:40 p.m. CST

    My Money's On Boll

    by ZombieSolutions

    i've never seen one of his apparently awful moobies, but i bet he could kick the crap out of anyone here who actually gives a shit enough to acknowlege his existance let alone his apparent crapulence.

  • June 13, 2006, 6:41 p.m. CST

    50 Rounds in 2 Days?

    by zillabeast

    Is he trying to take on all 5 citics over the 2 day span? What is he thinking?

  • June 13, 2006, 6:48 p.m. CST

    German Tax Hole = Uwe's ass

    by Durendal

    Where he lets the studios buttfuck him for cash. I seriously wish I'd published something, even a Rotten Tomatoes review on this crap. I'd sign up for this in a heartbeat and train my ass off so I could smear that sausage-sucking Kraut myself.

  • June 13, 2006, 6:56 p.m. CST

    any trained boxer

    by ectocriminal

    who invites amateurs to fight him without informing them of his training is a loser. uwe could win every fight by actually killing his untrained opponents and any other trained fighter would just laugh at him. i can almost garauntee almost any amateur boxer with a few fights under his belt would destroy this guy. and apparently his weight class is anywhere between middle and cruiserweight, which makes me think boll is between cruiser and heavyweight and trying to fihgt down in addition to fighting someone unprepared. message for uwe: you are fucking sad on every level. if you want to be a boxer, then do it. if you want to direct films, then do it. but please stop doing such a terrible job trying to do both.

  • June 13, 2006, 7:06 p.m. CST

    Um... Quantum Ken? About Vern.

    by jollysleeve

    What are you talking about? There is some weird urban legend that Vern is not a real person. It's not true. I'm pretty damn sure he is a real person, and a damn good writer to boot. (Although his name may not actually be Vern, and I would be surprised if he's ever actually seen the inside of a prison.) For some reason his Wikipedia entry says something to the effect that he's an amalgam or something... I have no idea where they got that from, but it's bullshit. Are we supposed to believe that a bunch of people anonymously got together to create a fake entity, taking painstaking measures to always write in the exact same style with the same peculiar sensibility--for the sole purpose of having this entity gain a mild to small cult internet following? What would be the fucking point? Someone correct me if I'm wrong.

  • June 13, 2006, 7:20 p.m. CST

    If Uwe Boll was serious, he'd know his weight class...

    by Uncapie

    ...and stay within its boundries. If he goes up against someone out of his class, say heavyweight to his light weight, he'll get creamed.

  • June 13, 2006, 7:33 p.m. CST

    The Blue Devil!

    by Immortal_Fish

    Talk about the PERFECT comic property for him to direct! A stuntman/inventor that gets the shit-end of the stick filming the latest big budget debacle. THIS MUST HAPPEN!! Good on ya, godhatesyou.

  • June 13, 2006, 8 p.m. CST

    Wait.

    by DarthCorns

    Doesnt this mean a shitload of free promotion of his movie? If these critics fight, then theyre gonna announce IM FIGHTING UWE BOLL. And if they are gonna be in the movie, ppl will go see it. I Hate Uwe Boll. Fucktard

  • June 13, 2006, 8:37 p.m. CST

    Boll versus Film Critics?

    by Harry Weinstein

    I'm pulling for Uwe Boll 100%. Imagine, one after one, the opponents step into the ring, and Boll destroys them, one after another. Then for his finishing move, he goes off and makes a really good movie. Yeah, it's fantasy, but after seeing this guy catching endless hate from all sides, I have to root for him by default. Dude's out there making movies - they might suck, no, correction, they suck, no "might" about it, but he's out there doing it. Most of the people talking shit on the man probably can't say the same thing. I look forward to watching him knocking some haters the fuck out. (I am writing myself a pass to use the word "haters" this one time, because it really fits the situation.)

  • June 13, 2006, 8:46 p.m. CST

    All those fights... is he remaking Diggstown?

    by Big Bad Clone

    Where the Pros meet Dr. Boll

  • June 13, 2006, 8:58 p.m. CST

    In regards the composite known as Vern

    by seppukudkurosawa

    Well, here's a little something you can add to the known facts on the mystery man. I got a couple e-mails from him the other day (for my entry in the 100 Most Baddass Films article he's got coming out) and the name he replied with was "Vern H". Hey, I guess that doesn't completely kill the possibility that he's some eccentric millionaire's pet project, but it's good enough evidence that he's just one lone wolf for me.

  • June 13, 2006, 9:01 p.m. CST

    i'm sorry...why can't vern fight him?

    by s0nicdeathmonkey

    huh?

  • June 13, 2006, 10:02 p.m. CST

    Where, oh where is Gus Van Rant?

    by Chief Redcock

    This thread deserves him.

  • June 13, 2006, 10:09 p.m. CST

    This is way better than Kevin Smith in the talkbacks.

    by beastie

  • June 13, 2006, 10:12 p.m. CST

    by the way...

    by beastie

  • June 13, 2006, 10:13 p.m. CST

    keep hitting the wrong button

    by beastie

    I've never seen one of his films. I've never dogged on him. Now, I have an urge to go out and rent his movies. At least the guy knows publicity.

  • June 13, 2006, 10:48 p.m. CST

    Uwe's final film should be his own suicide.

    by chickychow

    Just 10 minutes of him crying in a a tool shed, apologizing for wasting everybody's time with his German silliness, followed a shotgun blast under the chin. One of his tax-break companies can sell it for 9.99 on the net and it would easily be his most successful film to date. The only Boll-related flick that might do better business would be the sequel, in which his family goes to his grave, digs up his mangled corpse and collectively shits upon it, while fans of real cinema (and humanity in general) stand nearby and cheer wildly and drink to the desecration of history's greatest monster.

  • June 14, 2006, 12:26 a.m. CST

    Film History's Greatest Monster?

    by Paul T. Ryan

    Dear God, I hope Albert Pyun never does a video game adaptation. He'd be hiding under an assumed name from you lot for the rest of his life...

  • June 14, 2006, 2:09 a.m. CST

    I am 6'6" and 240

    by unclefishbits

    I need a proxy. I gotta get at this guy. Are electrical devices and explosives ok?

  • June 14, 2006, 2:15 a.m. CST

    Where's Panterarocks?

    by kintar0

    He's an oiled-up, roid popping body builder, isn't he? Boll should allow one TBer, and Panterarocks is our man. He'll come to screeching halt on the highway and run full tilt at your car, and that's just for flipping him the bird. He could make a pose off video and send it to Boll as an audition tape. He could oil himself up, scream about prolapsed colons and DEMONcrats and LIEbrals, posing threateningly. Boll would be too scared to fight him, though, probably.

  • June 14, 2006, 3:29 a.m. CST

    Less talking, more fighting!

    by DerLanghaarige

    C'mon, did anyone have already sent them a mail? Boll needs contenders, you chickens!

  • June 14, 2006, 3:39 a.m. CST

    FUC# Uwe Boll

    by SEGASTUD

    As being someone who has seen the toliet boll's films I can say with absolutte certainty that he is the worst director on the planet, in fact I have seen better films in my Iowa film school classes, and those suck!

  • June 14, 2006, 6:02 a.m. CST

    Uwe vs.The World

    by ImperialBitch

    ok let's start off with me saying that I just watched "BloodRayne" and all I have to say is that was expecting something much worse, alot better than House of the Dead, like going from a nuclear bomb to a hand grenade-impact still does damage just not as much. Anyhow is it just me or does this situation closley resemble the plot to Larry Clarke's "Bully"?? Brad Renfro's "Marty" being pushed around by Nick Stahl's "Bobby",then all of a sudden Marty get's the gumption to ICE Bobby's ass...this will NOT END WELL FOLKS!!! UWE BOLL IS GONNA PULL A "MARTY" ON ALL OF THOSE CRITICS. Roger Ebert is a tough cookie when it comes to Critical Journalism, but he is in no way Muhammed Ali, and Roeper -the only thing remaing of him will be soaking in the carpet. Boll-in-ator would then use David Spade(he may be a comic-but he still reviews movies on ShowBizShow) as Dental Floss . But all kidding aside , wether you like Uwe Boll or not, he is the one who is walking on to te set , he is the one who cashes those big checks, he is the one who is doing something with his life that he wants to do. He might not be making big money from U.S. theatrical releases of his films , but he is making a killing in the international market and dvd sales of his movies, he must be doing something right. Ohhh and has anyone ever heard of a man named ROGER CORMAN??...yeah I thought so.

  • June 14, 2006, 10:42 a.m. CST

    I've been sparring, boxing, and grappling for years

    by R.C. the "Wise"

    I've even sparred several times with Tito Ortiz, (good guy once you get pass his acerbic comments), so I'm pretty confident that I'd wipe the floor with Uwe's face.

  • June 14, 2006, 11:44 a.m. CST

    Is every "reviewer" on this site a pansy?

    by Screaming Brain

    That Boll guy gets his ass slammed on this site more than Brian Singer at a gay superhero slumber party. Not a single guy that represents this site is willing to finally back his mouth up? You guys are just as bad as some of the kids hiding behind their moniters talking shit to people they know they'll never have to confront in real life. This is your big chance guys, show the fans some love for once around here and send someone in to beat the living shit outta this guy. Of course he's doing it just to gain attention to himself and whatever shit game he's currently turning into a shit movie. So fucking what. You'd get plenty of free publicity too if one of you fuckers would take him on. I bet if it was Darth Lucas making this challenge to SW fans, there'd be a line from Cali to NY with people waiting to punch him in his fucking face. Where's Quint and whats his excuse going to be?

  • June 14, 2006, noon CST

    I think this publicity stunt is actually a trap.

    by chickychow

    Boll is gonna give whoever wanders into his cave and get a dull screwdriver in the gut.

  • June 14, 2006, 12:21 p.m. CST

    Boll is amazing

    by BayouWilly

    Look who is in his latest movie, Dungeon Siege. Ray Liotta, Leelee Sobieski, John Rhys-Davies. He's had Sir Ben Kingsley and Michael Madsen work for him. Surely by now people know he sucks... so how does he keep getting to cast fucking Henry Hill along with other actors that should clearly know better?

  • June 14, 2006, 1:44 p.m. CST

    Bloodrayne and house of the dead ruled

    by wolack22

    I thought they were awesome flicks... he's making a far cry adaption tooo... im so there

  • June 14, 2006, 1:49 p.m. CST

    forget my last post. I was shooting blacktar heroin...

    by chickychow

    but I still think Boll likes jabbing people with screwdrivers. I had a vision of it. My visions don't deceive me. I'm having one right now: Harry is splayed out on his basement floor, eating a dust-encrusted Snickers bar he found under his couch.

  • June 14, 2006, 2:54 p.m. CST

    It's Dr. Boll's birthday on the 22nd. What..

    by Borgnine JR

    ..kind of celebration is AICN preparing?

  • June 14, 2006, 3:43 p.m. CST

    as we are already in old europe:

    by drjones

    germany:0 poland:0 ....four minutes to go...

  • June 14, 2006, 3:48 p.m. CST

    yay

    by drjones

    germany:1!!! poland: zero

  • June 14, 2006, 11:07 p.m. CST

    Let me know if Michael Bay wants meet some

    by kabong

    Armageddon.

  • June 15, 2006, 4:52 a.m. CST

    Actually I wouldn't mind fighting Mr. Boll....

    by b3mike

    As long as I get a refund for renting HOTD plus compensation for getting PTSD after seeing a black hole open in my living room.

  • June 15, 2006, 6 a.m. CST

    Look, I'm a talkbacker!

    by DerLanghaarige

    I spend most of my day with telling the world how much I hate Uwe Boll and how this bastard should DIE DIE DIE a million of horribles deaths, but I'm not only scared to tell him this face to face, I'm also too chicken-hearted to beat him when he WANTS me to beat him. First! First! Too soon! Tarantino is the hottest tomboy beanpole on the planet! Every animation in the corner freaks me out! Muahahahahahaha!

  • June 15, 2006, 6:35 a.m. CST

    Probably not surprisingly, the real abusers ...

    by Shan

    ... of the tax system are foreign movie studios who are mostly avoiding flack at least until recently.... From wikipedia //////"While Boll has received a lot of negative publicity regarding this funding method, he was actually one of the few directors to use the tax shelter as intended. His films were financed, produced, and directed by a German company, which was the initial intention behind the tax shelter: to provide incentive for German companies to invest in entertainment properties. Regardless of the law's intention, most of these German film funds ended up funneling money to American studios to finance American blockbusters. The law merely required that the movie's copyright be owned by a German company; thus studios would "sell" a movie's rights to a German company, then immediately lease the movie back for a small fee, while the German owners would agree to very limited control. Essentially, the German company would own the movie on paper, but have no say over its production.[4] Because of this, in January 2006, as had been expected for several months, the German legislature changed the country's tax laws to eliminate the tax shelter.[5] It is not known if this will have any effect on Boll's funding as the new laws only seek to punish investors who are abusing the law for tax purposes; Boll's activities appear to be well within the legitimate usage of the tax shelter."

  • June 16, 2006, 5:02 p.m. CST

    This site should NEVER review another Boll film

    by Screaming Brain

    His movies suck, you guys ass slam him constantly yet when he calls you out you all "disappear" or get "too busy". Where's Quint in all this mess? Where's "Vern"? Funny how this thread died sooo quickly. I wanna see some fucking BLOOD come outta this guys face.

  • June 23, 2006, 2:28 a.m. CST

    In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale (2007)!

    by rivercb

    The poster alone brings tears to my eyes. Burt Reynolds is better than cocaine. Who keeps giving Uwe this kind of money?!!!

  • June 23, 2006, 2:33 a.m. CST

    Uwe's Lord of the Rings, I can almost smell his passion

    by rivercb

    http://oli.atknet.sk/king.mov

  • Sept. 22, 2006, 2:11 p.m. CST

    Jeff Sneider vs Uwe Boll LIVE on the Net!!!!

    by ReallyHonestly

    Jeff Sneider, journalist here at AintItCool, will be boxing Uwe Boll LIVE on the Net Saturday Sept 23rd at 7pmPacificTime on www.wavelit.com!!!! Watch Uwe get his ass kicked LIVE!!! www.wavelit.com

  • Sept. 22, 2006, 3:36 p.m. CST

    Jeff Sneider vs Uwe Boll LIVE on the Net!!!!

    by ReallyHonestly

    Jeff Sneider, journalist here at AintItCool.com, will be boxing Uwe Boll this Saturday Sept 23rd LIVE on www.wavelit.com at 7pmPST