April 23, 2006, 8:43 p.m. CST
That's about what this sounds like.
April 23, 2006, 8:47 p.m. CST
Sure, it wasn't a great work of art, but it was a decent film...certainly better than all these lame horror movies that people spooge all over all the time. I'm glad they are making a 2nd one. Just keep your expectations really low and you'll be OK.
April 23, 2006, 8:49 p.m. CST
no predator/female sexual tension in this one?
April 23, 2006, 8:49 p.m. CST
by Led Gopher
Go rent both AVP and DOOM this weekend. Watch two movies that could have been great but wound up selling us short. At least it will be fun, right? From what I hear both movies don't really require you to think or hold on to any expectations for greatness and I sometimes like "popcorn movies." True story.
April 23, 2006, 8:53 p.m. CST
Why can't the people put in charge of this shit-heap of a series understand why it ends up being bitchfest fodder for fanboys around the world? WE WANT COLONIAL MARINES, GOD FUCKING DAMN IT! NO MORE FUCKING HEROINES, NO MORE PUSSY SCRIPTS. We want Rated R, ass-kicking, full-auto WAR. If you can't bring it, skip it.
April 23, 2006, 8:54 p.m. CST
Basically, they should have ditched the human cast entirely and kept the setting in space and, preferably, in the future. Even still, both creatures deserve a fair amount of screen time and neither received it in AvP.
April 23, 2006, 8:55 p.m. CST
The novel is a *little* better than the movie. It showed more of what happened back in 1901 and there were 5 predators instead of the 3 we saw in the film.
April 23, 2006, 8:55 p.m. CST
by Dr. Meirschultz
Who thinks that this sounds awesome.
April 23, 2006, 8:55 p.m. CST
If you want the guide by which the series could be saved: http://ryanhornbeck.com/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=42&Itemid=1
April 23, 2006, 8:55 p.m. CST
Now on with the X-Men 3 review
April 23, 2006, 8:56 p.m. CST
by Logo Lou
How could you do worse than AVP 1? Hollywood found a way... Jesus Crist. No wait, that's AVP 3: AVPVJC.
April 23, 2006, 8:57 p.m. CST
by El Scorcho
Hmmmmm... Wait a sec...
April 23, 2006, 8:57 p.m. CST
You seem to be the only one interested in keeping this site going. Sounds like a POS script. It makes you wonder how stuff like this get's written, but also makes one feel better about their odds of becoming a hollywood scriptwriter.
April 23, 2006, 9:01 p.m. CST
by Jim Jam Bongs
Bwa-hahahahahahaha...! This is a late April Fools, right, Moriarity? This sounds like they're about to reduce the Alien and Predator franchises to the level of Tremors.
April 23, 2006, 9:09 p.m. CST
Aliens don't leave heat signatures... //groan.
April 23, 2006, 9:14 p.m. CST
what on earth are these people thinking? theyre too busy treating it as a b-rate franchise,when they should be knocking something out in line with alien or at the VERY least predator 2. And here was me hoping that a sequel would scrap everything from the first one. a crap retread of the aliens script would be better than this..... and at last ladies and gentleman we can say a fond farewell to the aliens movies and the predator movie. its over....period. thanks to the first avp we will never see a cameron alien 5. the best thing to do is forget that alien 4 and avp ever existed.
April 23, 2006, 9:16 p.m. CST
by drew mcweeny
Oh, come on. Quint's TRANSFORMERS piece today... Merrick's CASINO ROYALE piece... tons of reviews over the last few days by everybody... AICN's team is kicking boo-tay en masse, m'friend.
April 23, 2006, 9:18 p.m. CST
I hope this piece of shit never sees the big screen. In fact I wish the first one never made it either. Jigger Craigin was right after all. Who would have thought.
April 23, 2006, 9:23 p.m. CST
I can't believe FOX shot down a Cameron-Scott Alien 5 for this shit. Don't get me wrong, a AVP film would have been great, but Anderson just fucks up anything that has promise, just look at what he did with Resident Evil.
April 23, 2006, 9:31 p.m. CST
April 23, 2006, 9:31 p.m. CST
To review the Mortal Kombat 3 script. I bet that'd be funny, if not ethical or professional or objective. Hey, they're not all gems, are they, Moriarty? The bigger the franchise material, the more people are helping steer it into garbage town. But then, you're a working screenwriter, Moriarty, so you already know all this. Oh, you also forgot to mention your disdain for Fox honcho Tom Rothman, one of the forces behind AvP(s).
April 23, 2006, 9:34 p.m. CST
Weren't you the one who was going to do the Casino Royale script review? I'm pretty sure that was announced before Merrick even joined the site -- have I got this backwards, or did you hand that assignment off? Merrick did a great job on it, no argument there, it just struck me that I kept waiting to see that from you.
April 23, 2006, 9:36 p.m. CST
Jesus H. Christ this sounds like the biggest piece of shit ever to be written. When I read those 12 words (
April 23, 2006, 9:37 p.m. CST
by 'Cholera's Ghost
Thanks for kicking this script square in the balls, Moriarty. AvP1 was the single most disappointing, soul-crushing childhood gang-assrape of a film I have ever seen I will never get tired of hatin' on it. And this script review--I'm just speechless. I think they're just torturing me with the lamest-ass plot concepts they can think of. I think there's a big production board somewhere full of notes and wherever the most lame ideas come together they go "Yeah. That's the shit. fucking Predator and Alien fans can open wide on this one." with a diabolical experiment to see how much of a shitfest they can make a franchise before people actually stop buying tickets. Please, Fox production gods, for the love of all that is holy...is it too much to ask to give these franchises a not-stupidest-fucking-idea-ever treatment? Is it too much to ask to have it...ohhhh I don't know...in SPACE not a goddamn K-Mart Supercenter?
April 23, 2006, 9:40 p.m. CST
Now you know that someone's cousin really did write this script.
April 23, 2006, 9:41 p.m. CST
...like I boycott oil. Thank you for raping my childhood.
April 23, 2006, 9:45 p.m. CST
by Yellow Flamingo
Fuck whoever is making this movie! The thing that was great about the Alien franchise was that there was always some danger they would make it to Earth and no thats getting fucked over. I actually laughed out loud when i read the part about K-Mart. Is that it? Is that the best they could come up with? Thats a piss poor idea for a regular movie never mind an AVP flick.
April 23, 2006, 9:46 p.m. CST
AVP if done right would be excellent. They are just dropping the ball here. "Predaliens"? Give me a break.
April 23, 2006, 9:54 p.m. CST
by drew mcweeny
... I would publish Salerno's MK3 script review in a heartbeat. Get it to me! Quick!
April 23, 2006, 9:56 p.m. CST
Maybe you can explain to me how this works exactly, but since when does the host have any effect on the alien? In the aliens movies, they don't take on the characteristics of humans they gestate in, so what's the deal? I know continuity shouldn't be a big deal for me in a glorified monster movie, but it is. And it's pretty evident from your review that it is for you to. How can the writers so completely screw up something as basic as this, something that we've all seen a hundred times in the franchise? It's like they've never seen an alien movie. And a character named John McTiernan? Does he tap the predator's phones? Because if he did I might forgive the character's name.
April 23, 2006, 9:57 p.m. CST
moriarty!!! do any of the predators get it on with human women which was pretty much the entire point of the 1st movie? he just could sex her up because they were in the pyramid fighting for their lives, had it been different circumstances i smell predator/human babies...maybe this movie should be a romantic comedy with jennifer garner and a predator adjusting to city life
April 23, 2006, 10:04 p.m. CST
Why don't they just borrow stories from the books and comics? Didn't the predators create the aliens as the ultimate hunt or something?
April 23, 2006, 10:07 p.m. CST
It's good to have some script reviews back on the site. Thanks for the review, Mori, I'm sure it's every bit as shitastic that you say it is. Sadly, I'll still probably see it like the battered housewife I am when it comes to my favorite horror franchises...
April 23, 2006, 10:10 p.m. CST
If they must follow up on the last story line, how about have it crash back down here in McMurdo Station, 200 people isolated for the Antarctic winter.
April 23, 2006, 10:17 p.m. CST
by Rant Breath
This shit makes me physically angry. Go to any geek website and you'll find dozens of Alien vs Predator fanfiction only a thousand times better than this "civlian texas family vs alien-predator hybrids" bullshit. And I don't want to see predators dying constantly you fucking idiots! Predators rarely make mistakes. One predator, ONE, nearly took out an entire advanced military squad. Their technology is thousands of years beyong NASA. I want to see futuristic cyber-enhanced space marines get decimated by a two-man team of predators. Not ten predators die in a fucking plane crash!!! The Alien VS Predator franchise has the potential to exceed, thats right, exceed the originals but we get some guy who should be writing Scooby Doo 3 in charge of the best sci-fi villians ever created. Why does Fox hate the us so much? Did we take something they loved and destroy it? Tell me! WHAT THE FUCK DID WE DO TO DESERVE THIS SHIT!!!
April 23, 2006, 10:29 p.m. CST
I'm afraid that you are the only one. I don't know what that means but you just keep on keepin on brother.
April 23, 2006, 10:32 p.m. CST
by 'Cholera's Ghost
Foreshadowing tie-in to Resurrection. Ooooooooooh.
April 23, 2006, 10:34 p.m. CST
... is that people are going to see it. It will make JUST ENOUGH money to not be considered a total failure in the theaters. The DVD rentals and sales will be very high. And here is where it truly gets scary... the unrated double-dip DVD that is only two minutes longer, with MORE of the kid vs bully story thread. The combined success of the theater, DVD, and double-dip DVD (maybe in HD-DVD or Bluray) will be interpreted by Fox Studios as a DEMAND for AVP3, and that one will be somehow be even worse than AVP2. Death to Fox!
April 23, 2006, 10:34 p.m. CST
by Logo Lou
I'm no Moriarty, which has it's advantages and disadvantages, but Alien 3 introduced the concept of The alien taking genetic cues from it's host, ie: the "dog alien." It could be an interesting concept, but I pretend the Alien and Predator franchises both stopped at the first two movies. I know Alien 3 has its fans, I'm just not one of them. I also do the "first two" rule with Batman, Superman, Godfather, and Halloween.
April 23, 2006, 10:40 p.m. CST
by Darth Thoth
I'm still on the floor laughing over "Predalien." My goodness! AvP was a piece of doo-doo and it appears as if the trend will continue with AvP2. The only thing worse than seeing the legacy of a once legendary franchise go down the tubes is to see TWO once legendary franchises go down together in one fell swoop. Really sad.
April 23, 2006, 10:40 p.m. CST
by Osmosis Jones
...of the original 1990 graphic novel, with Lucy Liu as Machiko Noguchi. While I found the AvP movie to be fun in a low calorie, Frankenstein vs. Wolf Man kind of way (hey, I got a free ticket in the Predator DVD, so what the hell), I'm still sad that the kick-ass comic will never be adapted for the big screen.
April 23, 2006, 10:42 p.m. CST
Your indignation made for excellent reading. This may be sentimental hyperbole, but when you give a pan like this to something like Abrams' SUPERMAN script or SUSPECT ZERO, it almost feels like you've done me a favor.
April 23, 2006, 10:45 p.m. CST
This is the type of article that got me reading AICN almost a decade ago. I do agree with some of the site's detractors that AICN has seemed more "safe" these days, but if more worthwhile early-criticism of obvious duds like AVP2 get "leaked" in advance, maybe the kibosh can be put on the whole project a la that Superman nonsense from just a few years back. Congrats on CigBurns too, by the way.
April 23, 2006, 10:46 p.m. CST
I'm a little shocked after reading this, almost like I'm trying to wish it away and hope that it never happens. I am so incredibly pissed off at Fox for destroying two of the best sci-fi series ever created. I like the Predator films but I'm a HUGE fan of the first two Alien movies (I've warmed up to the third one over the years) and this news just kills me.
April 23, 2006, 10:49 p.m. CST
I just threw up all over my laptop. I'm sending the bill to Fox. This is just horse shit.
April 23, 2006, 10:55 p.m. CST
I need to know how bad this sucks. Kinda sinds like an unfunny/uncool version of Slither, but with Aliens, Predators and a PG-13 rating. Cool!
April 23, 2006, 10:55 p.m. CST
by Warlock One
...You don't respect the Aliens, or the Predator. Commandos, you idiots. Space Marines. Ripley, one of the toughest heroines ever created. If the humans the title extraterrestrials are set against are either horror-movie cliches with bullseyes on their foreheads or (*shudder*) human interest story placeholders, as Moriarty seems to imply these will be, we can't respect the Aliens and Predators as credible threats facing worthy adversaries. We need to see people pushed to the wall who are capable of pushing back; it's the common theme of both the Aliens movies and the Predator movies. If we never respect the humans, we won't give a rat's ass. In fact, if the "heroes" are a bunch of sorry sons-of-bitches, we'll probably cheer the Aliens and Predators killing them all off, because, y'know, the Aliens and Predators who faced off against Schwarzeneggar and Weaver and, hell, Danny Glover, would have wiped the floor with 'em. And when they don't, we'll be disappointed.
April 23, 2006, 11:04 p.m. CST
Is this a PG-13 or R? Any "fucks" or detailed gore? Although i'm pretty sure it would very easy to turn into a pg-13
April 23, 2006, 11:07 p.m. CST
"For the first time ever, an ALIEN FOOTPRINT forms on American soil!" This would sound really cool if it were set in the time of Ellen Ripley. But it's set at least a hundred years before Ellen Ripley. It COMPLETELY negates the ALIEN series, which are all about evil companies or militaries trying to harness the Alien's power and bring it to Earth. We watched in fear, along with the characters, imagining what would happen if the Aliens ever reached Earth. We even got a tease, a glimpse, in the comic series featuring the continuing adventures of Hicks and Newt (after the events of Alien 3, the story was rewritten with Wilks and Billie). And damn, the way the Aliens infested the planet was a trip. But according to this script, there's nothing to fear with the Aliens getting to Earth. Just gather them in a K-Mart and take care of business. No more Mother, not more Father, no more Sub-Level 3, no more dark tunnels in a prison that humanity forgot about. Not it's blue light specials. Even AVP, while a shitty film, respected the continuity of the ALIEN films. You can understand that the incident got The Company curious enough to probably search out these bugs, and it took them a very long time to find them (with help from the Nostromo). Thanks to a Predator explosion, no evidence left behind. But now...are they going to nuke this Texas town? Otherwise there will be some evidence. Something to make the Alien species not a complete mystery.
April 23, 2006, 11:12 p.m. CST
It's so sad to think that for nearly 20 years they carefully protected the Alien series and were sure that each one came from an interesting director with a unique vision. Yeah, so the last two made a lot of people unhappy, but I think both stand up as interesting movies to this day and both made very daring choices, and both have directors who went on to bigger and better things. It was such a shame that they decided to piss away those decades of hard earned credibility on a silly PG-13 crossover movie from the director of Mortal Kombat, but I was able to just not watch it, and life goes on. But this... this is just too much. Aliens hunting a pizza boy in modern day Texas? You might as well put Indiana Jones in fraternity comedy. NOBODY is going to like it. I think even my 9 year old nephew, the only person I've ever heard of who liked Alien vs. Predator, will be offended by that premise. I appreciate Moriarty's attempts to be respectful and not personally attack the writer, but I think this is a case where the writer IS deserving of a certain amount of derision. Because even if he's writing from a set-in-stone treatment that he's not responsible for, he should not have taken the job. Maybe it's not immoral on the level of selling crack to kids, but it's still wrong. The very best thing you could say about it is that it's being a whore. Don't do it.
April 23, 2006, 11:16 p.m. CST
how did face huggers get into the predator ship to being with? the predalien was not a queen that laid eggs, was it?
April 23, 2006, 11:20 p.m. CST
between a predator and a female human just like in the first flick. that would be awesome. What ever happened to science fiction movies actually having science fiction in them?
April 23, 2006, 11:31 p.m. CST
by The Pusher
April 23, 2006, 11:32 p.m. CST
by Toxic Frog
WHY? It could be an endless supply of ticket sales, DVD sales, maquette and figure sales, videogames, etc. They've apparently decided to take one last sip rather than re-fill the glass. Morons.
April 23, 2006, 11:38 p.m. CST
not only are they pissing me off with a crappy sequel, but making me even more furious that I sat through the first one expecting some kind of payoff....
April 23, 2006, 11:48 p.m. CST
to read more book
April 23, 2006, 11:49 p.m. CST
I'd sure as hell sign a petition...even if fox don't listen...it'll just make me feel better. I wish someone would start one....
April 23, 2006, 11:51 p.m. CST
April 23, 2006, 11:52 p.m. CST
The 2 most influential and revered scifi film franchises around, with a heritage going back a quarter century, so known and loved they entered popular culture, reduced to this. Heartbreaking. It's got to be some kind of cynical spite. What did the franchises, the former directors who worked on them, the people who watched and loved them, do to warrant this. I just can't believe it. What a nightmare.
April 23, 2006, 11:55 p.m. CST
by Prof. Pop-Cult
...Should start a new franchise parodying sci-fi movies.
April 23, 2006, 11:56 p.m. CST
April 24, 2006, 12:08 a.m. CST
Pay attention audience, this will be on Thursday's test.
April 24, 2006, 12:10 a.m. CST
Oh, and death to Tom Rothman.
April 24, 2006, 12:20 a.m. CST
What pissed me off the most about the first AVP was that two of the three predators die really fucking quickly and if you think about it, Scar really didn't last long either since he got face hugged real quick. The other thing I hated was the wimpy noise of their shoulder cannons compared to the Pred 1/2 that whiplash sound is just so iconic, and it made the cannons in AVP sound like pop guns (and please, no technobabble about how those cannons were probably older models and hence weaker blah blah blah..I don't fucking care..give me a cool sound effect!!) I want to see a group of predators kicking ass and taking names and not getting their asses handed to them in five seconds.
April 24, 2006, 12:25 a.m. CST
The Cameron/Scott Alien 5 movie could have been made already, had AVP not been greenlit first. We would already be enjoying, or be close to enjoying, the 3 disc double-dip version of Alien 5 right now! But NOOOOOOOO!
April 24, 2006, 12:27 a.m. CST
Remember when milking a cow was an art? Now they just hook 'em up to a machine an' flick the switch. Mooooo!
April 24, 2006, 12:31 a.m. CST
PSH: "First I'm going to lay an egg in your throat. Then I'm going to sell my oscar and use the money to gamble until I have enough money to buyout Walmart, then I'm going to do a parody of 'Alien,' but I will call it 'Immigrant.' Then I'm going to start an Alien nest in Walmart, and put a big bullseye on the front door, so people will know where to find us and kill us all. At the same time, people will mistake us as the store, Target, because of the bullseye. Then I'm going to kill 10 Predators just by giving them the Phillip Seymour Hoffman version of 'Blue Steel.' Then I'm going to expose you as the REAL Queen Alien, Mr. Cruise. Then I'm going to kidnap your wife, then I'm going to kill you in front of her."
April 24, 2006, 12:34 a.m. CST
But I had hoped when I heard of AVP2 that they'd get it right this time. Bummer.
April 24, 2006, 12:48 a.m. CST
by Curtis Spicoli
I'd personally bankroll a proper new ALIEN flick, and I'd hire Ridely Scott to direct the movie. I'd spend every fucking nickel to finally see the ALIEN homeworld. What the fuck is wrong with FOX? Instead of developing two solid franchises with tons of potential for licensing and sequels, a la The Lord of the Rings, they have created this diluted mishmash that totally wastes both. They could get at least three more flicks out of the Alien series, the way I see it: Part 1 - Aliens infest Earth, totally fucking it up. Could you imagine Aliens swarming in a futuristic London or Manhattan? Why the fuck haven't we seen this movie yet?. Part 2 - Humans travel to Alien homeworld in effort to find way to defeat the Aliens, and much horror and Geiger-inspired weird shit ensues. Maybe we'd meet the Space Jockeys, and maybe they'd be worse than the Aliens themselves (Just one idea) Part 3 A balls-out cage match of machines guns, nuclear explosions, drooling monsters and cool futuristic shit. Give Cameron what he wants to get him to direct the action parts, let Ridley Scott handle the Alien homeworld stuff. I can't believe the best we'll get is Aliens running around Texas. Fuckin' studio morons. I'd better go buy those lotto tickets.
April 24, 2006, 12:50 a.m. CST
Seriously? This sounds alot like Critters 1 and 2. Small midwest town. Evil carnivorious killing machines that start out small and get bigger escape from their captors/unwilling hosts and crash land on earth, in a small country town. They then proceed to wreak havoc and kill people, only to have 2 aliens who are known bounty "hunters" come to track them down and kill them. Am I missing anything? It really does sound like they decided mixing Critters with a bit of Tremors was a good idea. I'm sorry, I want the fucking marines, I want pulse rifles. I want some far off distant planets nuked from orbit because it's the only freaking way to be sure. GET THE ALIENS OFF EARTH for crying out loud.
April 24, 2006, 12:50 a.m. CST
by Curtis Spicoli
Please forgive me. I was writing while angry.
April 24, 2006, 12:51 a.m. CST
by Hell's Cigarette
Remember when Sigourney was interested in coming back to the original Alien franchise a few years ago and thought the AVP idea was ridiculous? I remember reading about that on Dark Horizons and thinking, why doesn't Fox just give the property to her and let her produce an Alien 5? I thought that Joss Whedon had some ideas about what the aliens would do once they reached Earth...but, what truly would have been a great idea is to send the hybrid Ripley along with Call, a massive military force and a Paul Reiser type to the alien homeworld directed by James Cameron...like Earth governments were worried about an alien distress call that communicated the location of Earth...I mean, fuck, these films are not action shoot 'em ups...you can't even classify Aliens as such. Or, if they insist on having an AVP film, why not get Arnold to stop being a politician and throw $60 million at him and Sigourney to do this concept any sort of justice? That fucking trailer alone featuring those two would guarantee $300 million domestic box office...who gives a shit if it costs $200 million to make? It's called a tentpole, not some POS that does modest BO in August and sells decently on DVD...why not hire David Webb Peoples or fucking Alvin "I'm 75 Years Old Writing Spiderman Films" Sargent to craft a decent story with the original creators of these franchises instead of some hack that wrote ghetto ass TV shows that were cancelled after a few shitty seasons.
April 24, 2006, 12:54 a.m. CST
The alien ship crashes back in Antarctica on top of the Borg sphere from First Contact. 5 minutes later we get a Predator-Alien-Borg hybrid (A Borglienator). Madness ensues. Hell, if you're gonna kill 2 franchises, why not go for 3?
April 24, 2006, 12:55 a.m. CST
Scathing review, Mori. Sounds like a load of ass, though, so I don't feel too bad for Shane Salerno or Squeak Scolari or whatever the fuck his name isn't.
April 24, 2006, 1 a.m. CST
when I was in junior high school...
April 24, 2006, 1:15 a.m. CST
Holy crap, I had a more thrilling time taking a crap this past Friday then I would be watching this movie. That's right!!! The restroom stale I originally ran into was a mess. I mean it was probably too small for some fat guy, so the fat guy decided to just fucking shit everywhere and leave it like that. So I ran into the next stale and started setting the toliet cover seats. Just as I was sitting down, I took one last deep breath before I knew the unholy smell was going to unleashed. That's when I looked over and saw that there was no toliet paper. I think the thought of no toliet paper scared the crap right out of me. Anyways, I started laughing hysterically for 5 mins and had to make do with the toliet seat covers. Freaking funny times.
April 24, 2006, 1:15 a.m. CST
I mean this is just gut-wrenching. It's clear that these franchises need a hero, a la JJ Abrams taking over TREK. But who, WHO can save Aliens and Predator????
April 24, 2006, 1:29 a.m. CST
...and start writing. I'm a firm believer in "put yer money where yer mouth is" so I will work harder knowing the AVP I want to see will never happen. Screenwriting isn't easy and filmaking isn't any easier but it helps to put in an effort. And you are right MORIARTY. The news on this site in the past 24 hours has been proving the "ain't it cool" part of the "news". Sorry you got stuck delivering this message. Lucky you didn't get shot. You guys are doing a great job. Any Indy 4 talk coming?
April 24, 2006, 1:31 a.m. CST
Let's pray they kill this piece of horseshit before somebody greenlights it. I'd rather see a film where 2 Predators do a re-encatment of Brokeback Mountain that this piece of crap.
April 24, 2006, 1:31 a.m. CST
by Lenny Nero
There was an extended fight sequence involving (I believe) some kind of tractor/woodchipper/destructive machinery thing after the ship crash lands. Or that's what I remember from around 1996.
April 24, 2006, 2:01 a.m. CST
by Bari Umenema
You studio twits deserve an honest shitty review like this. You're the asswipes who hired Shithead to write this piece of shit. Please make this movie so it bombs. Then you can review your development notes and your marketing strategy and try to figure out why it bombed. What a bunch of losers. You schmucks really don't deserve to be in charge of these properties. You have abused your ownership to such an extent that this is what we wind up with. Losers.
April 24, 2006, 2:06 a.m. CST
I just looked on the internet movie database and discovered that the individual who wrote this script is also doing a remake of one of my favorite Charles Bronson pictures, THE MECHANIC. Only the original was about an underworld hitman and the remake is a spy movie. It's always best to buy the name of a movie most people never heard of and then write something that has nothing to do with the original movie. All I'm saying is, don't get too close to Bronson's grave, buddy, 'cause that's the wrong skeleton to fuck with.
April 24, 2006, 2:11 a.m. CST
Minorities everywhere, and kids looking to get hand jobs from their dates will see this movie. As long as studios keep making money off the idiots they will go see it.
April 24, 2006, 2:23 a.m. CST
AVP was retarded and embarassing, like Episode 1 and now they're giving us Episode 2...and they'll give us Episode 3 whether we like it or not. Let's just hope the third sequel is somewhat watchable in the way that I dug fifteen/twenty minutes of fun out of Lucas' cashout. Best you can hope for. BTW, are they making another Freddie vs Jason..in fan hell?
April 24, 2006, 2:27 a.m. CST
by Rant Breath
Fox knows they could call it "Predaliens the Musical" with Uwe Boll directing and the movie will still make a shit-load of money. Hell I knew AvP was going to suck when PSWAnderson was attatched but went to see it anyway because I'm so starved for a Predator-related entertainment I would watch a predator reading the phonebook. Fox has my soul. I pray to J.C.(James Cameron) for our salvation.
April 24, 2006, 2:50 a.m. CST
A predator, aliens, and humans converge for an epic battle of wits and weaponry at.... A department store? Um... When do Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt burst forth in awkward-yellow-glasses to dispatch foes while dodging missles? Or is that the clever twist when the Predator's mask inevitably comes off? Angelina is revealed as her hubby remarks on the quality of K-Mart products?? Lord knows her lips could hide the fangs. And I knew she was adopting foreigners, but this may all be slightly excessive... Sigh... I joke because the pain is too great. GOOD GOD. Wait, did I say God? There is no God. Silly me. There is only Anderson, the Dark Prince of Evil that sits upon a throne of cinephiles broken dreams, drinking the sweet tears of crying fans, and picking his teeth with the bones of 13-year-old-boys that made the mistake of believing him when he said "I make movies, little child." No, young readers, he does not. He is the Anti-Midas, turning that which is gold into petrified dung. Once again, I correct myself: Not Anti-Midas. Anti-Christ. Lets keep it simple. May God have mercy on us all.
April 24, 2006, 2:51 a.m. CST
From what you've imagined, as well as so many folk here, there could be a great story pieced together that would satisfy all of us. I absolutely love the idea of seeing more of Predator society, especially their homeworld. However, I don't think the Aliens have a homeworld, I always imagined they were somehow native to space itself- living weapons engineered by space-faring assholes, probably not unlike us, who have since been extinct for ages, naturally. I would also love to see Aliens 'infesting' Earth, in a large, epic way, like someone suggested- countless aliens swarming over a metropolitan area... this might pose problems with continuity in the larger franchise, but I'm sure a clever writer could deal with it. Maybe New York is infested, the government decides to nuke the city, and this somehow gives rise to a new totalitarian state funded and ruled by the "Company" that everyone works for in the future. The Company covers it up, but like someone else suggested, they impliment a campaign of searching for the Aliens- deep space mining operations like Ripley's are actually covert fishing expeditions, and so on... Anyway, all this to say- Tremors, Critters, etc. is a pretty low bar to set considering the potential these franchises offer, and like you pointed out, how much they mean to nerds like us.
April 24, 2006, 3:09 a.m. CST
and if they go with this script, then this will be even worse. It is absolutely baffling to me. Someone, at some point down the line, made the DECISION to make these movies this way. Who the fuck was it and why they fuck are they working in movies?
April 24, 2006, 3:12 a.m. CST
If you liked AVP or have the nerve to even say something like, "it wasn't that bad," then i officially decree that you have your head up your ass or you're 12 years old. Probably both. I generally hate when people say things like i just said, but seriously.. AVP could be used in scientific studies to separate people with and without their heads up their asses. It's scientific.
April 24, 2006, 3:17 a.m. CST
What the fuck is wrong with FOX? Do they just fucking hate every sci-fi property they own or fucking what? This movie will do the impossible! Make the forst AvP LOOK GOOD! Fucking A, I hate this VS shit.
April 24, 2006, 3:18 a.m. CST
I don't think I'm saying anything new here, but I reckon an adapted piece of fan fiction would be better than this piece of arse. Still, the last one was terrible and EVERYONE SAW IT. We have no-one to blame but ourselves.
April 24, 2006, 3:22 a.m. CST
...of precisely the group of amoebas at whom the first one was aimed and who will make sure Salerno's second vomit stream will make money, too (speaking of Salerno -- someone kill it, please.) It's the "Wow, like, dude, action! Stuff blows up! Wow! Cool! Monsters! Guns! Chicks! Wow! Cool! Dude!" audience (and the last three words make up 70% of their daily vocabulary.) They don't need to "keep their expectations low", because their 'taste' is already below any lines, and they don't need to "check their brains at the door" (another idiotic favourite line of theirs) because their brains haven't been used for their entire lives, anyway. Root for and enjoy your "Freddy versus Predator" in 2008, lunkheads.
April 24, 2006, 3:50 a.m. CST
Is Anderson gonna be squeezing out this turd or is he still working on that castlvania film that hes going to fuck up so royally,i just have no faith in this guy whatsoever.
April 24, 2006, 3:50 a.m. CST
They really hate genre movies.
April 24, 2006, 3:51 a.m. CST
Nothing prepared me for this. What I've read here today is truly a slap in the face to all of the fans who grew up with these films. ALIENS is the movie that had the biggest impact on me as a child and it really changed the way I looked at movies. The very reason that I visit this site is because of that movie. The continuity that has been established in those films (even the weaker entries) is ripe with ideas for future installments and a few bad decisions made by a money hungry studio with no real love for the projects they control have led us to this - Aliens and Predators battling it out in modern day Texas with a nerdy pizza delivery guy, an ex-con, a sheriff and an assorted cast of locals who are different variations of characters we've seen in countless other movies tagging along for the ride. Bad idea. Tom Rothman mentioned in a brief interview a while back that he was looking forward to really bringing the two iconic monsters into our world. If this is what he meant then shame on him. It's a terrible concept that the fans do not want to see and it destroys the continuity of the previous films, the superior films. Even the first AVP had the good sense to isolate the action and clean the slate at the end of the movie so that it wouldn't mess with what was already established in the previous films. It's sad to know that Paul Anderson's doomed popcorn movie will now seem like a masterpiece compared to this crap. The idea of Predator pyramids in Antarctica doesn't seem so bad by comparison.
April 24, 2006, 4:10 a.m. CST
...that even Dr. Uwe Boll himself upon reading it would doubtlessly exclaim:
April 24, 2006, 4:12 a.m. CST
You can tell how popular a proposed film subject is by the number of aicn talkback messages. this has shitloads. as if Fox needed confirmation that it has a goldmine in the alien pred films. unfortunately it sounds like they have lost some pride in their product. this script sounds like a way to get the most profit out of a film. make it cheap in the knowledge that people will see it purely based on their love of the previous films. quality is no longer an issue. it's back to the lazy horror movie formula of setting it in present day small town America, so no expensive sets to design & build. Fox must know what people want to see, an alien or predator homeworld, but that would equal larger expendature therefore smaller mark up. sad that we still won't get this. there's potentially still life left in this series. Paul Anderson actually pulled off something with AVP. Despite the awful b movie title, it was a quite a good film. it had the exotic location, essential to these films. without that they fall into the lame terretory of all those unimaginative instantly forgettable movies that litter the shelves of rental stores. predator 2 being one of them. alien films require the viewer to be transported to another world, then scared shitless. Sure Texas is a scary place, it spawned the Bush, but it isn't scary enough for an alien.
April 24, 2006, 4:13 a.m. CST
... at "grows to 9 feet tall in seconds"... hey, fucktards, here's a cent, go get a clue...
April 24, 2006, 4:24 a.m. CST
...there is NO legitimate monetary excuse for a studio of Fox's stature to not set AvP2 on another world. With the relative cheapness of digital effects these days, it would cost them virtually nothing. Hell, do a by-the-numbers adaptation of the original Dark Horse comic. Besides being a great story, it was also illustrated by a former storyboard artist for fuck's sake. Story and production design in one fell swoop. Shoot it at Coober Pedy in Australia like Pitch Black, enhance with a few digital sunsets or an extra moon or two and there's your fucking alien world right there. You ASSHOLES!
April 24, 2006, 4:50 a.m. CST
after HELLRAISER II: HELLBOUND, which was actually quite good. Or hey, every CHILDREN OF THE CORN, LEPRECHAUN and PROPHECY sequel. Cheap crap made so they can make a quick buck. Whatever.
April 24, 2006, 4:52 a.m. CST
by Rant Breath
Do you have to eat a human baby to prove you're committed to evil?
April 24, 2006, 4:55 a.m. CST
The bit where the chestburster hatched out of Purvis. The camera goes down his mouth into his chest and follows the alien back out through Wren's head.
April 24, 2006, 5:03 a.m. CST
there is a Perfectly perfect AvP story lying untouched in the AvP2 game a few years back. im not kiddin, they just make that into a movie we'd all be happy. we see the same story from 3 different perspectives, which could be so intresting! it could be like that simpsons episode where you see the days events from 5 different perspectives which eventually reveals the full story. that would be such an utter perfect geekfest. AND they already did the "what an alien does inside a human" in the game. you got to slash through the guys chest cavity yourself, it was great:)
April 24, 2006, 5:04 a.m. CST
... and call it Slither?
April 24, 2006, 5:10 a.m. CST
Fuck you Fox! I want an Alien Versus Predator film I can watch and enjoy without having to set expectations to subzero. You stupid fucking arseholes have access to thousands of great ideas from any number of fans for free or if you want to pay a small fee to overworked comic writers you could buy the Dark Horse stories but no you give us this queef. Fuck you very much. AVP was mildly watchable in parts and only while Lance was around, mostly it was just lame and retarded but it was still a start. ANYONE, ANYONE can write a better story for AVP2 than this crapola even if they were saddled with the premise of having to follow on from the weakarse ending of AVP. I'm frothing right now with anger at such a wasted opportunity to create a truly brilliant genre film or AT THE VERY LEAST an entertaining B-grade 50s stylle popcorn film. Fuck you fuck you fuck you. Awgh I'm choking on my own rage here.
April 24, 2006, 5:25 a.m. CST
I only got as far as the introduction of the Texas family and I had this over whelming urge to go watch Critters. Now I'm back to see what else happens in this new sage set to light our hearts on fire. Be careful with that script Moriarty, I suspect toilet paper this large rips.
April 24, 2006, 5:37 a.m. CST
Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to mourn the passing of two great franchises... Y'know, its staggering how fucking retarded Studios are. Two huge Sci-Fi horror franchises and some idiot decided to set them together in bumfuck texas. Salerno, hang your head in shame mate. When something stinks this bad of roasted donkeybollocks, no excuses of how hard it it to surveve within the system are acceptable. You just DON'T FUCKIN' WRITE IT !!!!!!!!!!!!!!
April 24, 2006, 5:40 a.m. CST
What IS with all the amateurish "hat-tipping" that goes on nowadays? Is there some hack-director's guide book that says it's mandatory? See: Alien vs. Predator, Doom, Daredevil... It's like they think fans will jump out of their seat and scream "this shit is AUTHENTIC!" every time they make a hollow namecheck.
April 24, 2006, 6 a.m. CST
Why aren't the _real_ directors and script makers doing these movies?? Thinking about the possibilities this franchise had just makes me feel sick to the tummy... Oh'man. *Regicidal_Maniac* You are so right about that _anyone_ can do better then what they seem to have done here. I mean I wrote better scripts to my school book when I got bored. Seriously FOX wake up!!!???
April 24, 2006, 6:03 a.m. CST
by Edward Brock
Sure, this script has suckage all over it but the home planet? I know people have been asking for it since forever but why the hell would you want to spoil the mystery around their origin? Not even the Space Jockey while you're at it. That sort of thing has been tried in comics and it should stay that way. Don't you think it was enough that they tried to ruin the Weyland-Yutami/Delerict connection in the first movie? It's like when they tried to explain HAL9000's madness in 2010. You just don't go there. For me, the mystery is one of the foundations of the franchise's charm.
I am amazed by this planet we're living on. How could this kind of thing happen or even be mentioned? This it total absurdity, it's almost funny to some extent. Well it would be funny if it wasnt about the two best creatures that came from Hollywood movies in the past 20 years... or even EVER! And we can be sure that the director they'll chose is a hack or a "yes-man" without any talent. When I think about my own situation: I am a movie director in Switzerland and people say im "sooo talented"... and guess what, I am completely broke without any opening to get my film projects on track while some hacks are getting millions of $ just to make crap. Oh that's the way our world is working I might hear, the Economy rules everything. Well then what about making GOOD movies that still bring cash on the table 15 years later? what about making masterpieces that do sell very well and that are also considered as artistically successful? If any Fox suit is reading this, then do whatever it takes to contact me and ill do an AVP that'll surprise and please all fans giving them what they want PLUS some original ideas never developped even in novels and comics that stay true to the alien and predator myths. Just call me and you won't regret it, let's bring Giger back on track too for some amazing designs. JUST BE SMART FOR ONCE.
April 24, 2006, 6:08 a.m. CST
...this is ONLY happening to make a bunch of people a load of money, NOT to satisfy our appreciation for good entertainment - WE DO NOT COUNT FOR ANYTHING EXCEPT THE GENERATION OF MONEY...
April 24, 2006, 6:18 a.m. CST
by Azlam Orlandu
...yeah you heard me.
April 24, 2006, 6:30 a.m. CST
.... IS ALIENS VS PPREDATORS! NO HUMANS!! NO DIALOGUE!!!JUST ALIENS VERSING PREDATORS!!!! THAT IS ALL!!!!! set it on a forest world where the Predators 'seed' the rich abudant life with Alien eggs. Lets see the Aliens in their cave dwelling haulocast world. lets see the predators and their Curousant type world - which is filled with monsters of ALL walks, not just the predators. (The predators are like a tame faction that take no shit from any leaders) check please.
April 24, 2006, 6:50 a.m. CST
Remember this is not the script that will get shot. This is the one to get a budget approved, so they usually low-ball the action to try to make it look affordable.
April 24, 2006, 6:51 a.m. CST
I love you for that Moriarty.
April 24, 2006, 6:51 a.m. CST
ASH BABY! You know you want to see Bruce working behind the desk at K (S?) Mart for the final show down. Queen alien, stomping around, then cut to Ash with his boomstick and chainsaw. "Lady, I'm afraid I'll have to ask you to leave the store." If you're gonna fuck up these fine franchises, do it in style.
April 24, 2006, 7:01 a.m. CST
AVP is a video game series after all
April 24, 2006, 7:02 a.m. CST
As usual, you're missing the point: Aliens. And Predators. In K-Mart.
April 24, 2006, 7:25 a.m. CST
I mean, the fact that someone got it to moriarty wher eit could be panned means someone was waiting for this responce. If Fox had in it's shelves a script(s) that was something extraordinary they would not let it out. the truth is though, they already do have a good script in their possession - it's the original AVP spec script that came VERY CLOSE to be made. Unfortunately, he just lifted the story to much from the comics for it to be encouraged. Persoanlly though, i've always loved the way Alien Resurrection brought us back to something Cameron'esk. i'm not blind to it's faults. But consider AVP1 as it stands, and the dreaded future of AVP2. Alien Resurrection - dare I say Alien3 - were competant. I just want to see a cool Alien vs predator film. full or skirmishes and fights. In forests, in cities. NO HUMANS. just fucking do it. It'll be awesome.
April 24, 2006, 7:29 a.m. CST
You know one of the things i will say about the BILLION films I've walked out of disapoined over the past 10 years - they all had something in common. They all looked as if the special effects people and the actual filmmakers were, like, fighting over who was actually making the film. So often the special effects cast a huge shadow over anything an actor or a composed scene could ever achieve. So often the special effects are in a whole class of their own. So why the hell don't they give this film off to a special effects house and just let them go loose. Let them concieve a full Alien Vs. Predator film where it's all special effects. These guys know what they're doing. Let them have a film like this. It's time.
April 24, 2006, 7:38 a.m. CST
Predator V. Aliens V. Critters!! You know you want it!!!!
April 24, 2006, 7:44 a.m. CST
Okay I think I'll just ignore the ending of AVP for the moment and move forward in time about I don't know a hundred years. Okay so we follow a group of Company owned Colonial Marines as they get ordered to land on a frozen mudball asteroid/comet thingy that has entered our solar system on an elliptical orbit. They land and they find... I guess another one of those Pyramids from the first film. Wait-a-minute maybe these guys are prospectors like ready to drill this gasball asteroid and they find a crashed Predator ship so okay it's like Armageddon meets Within The Rock I know not very original I grant you that. Okay on the crashed Predator ship is the PredAlien, though we don't get to see it clearly straight away, and it quickly makes short work of many of the miners, they get off a distress call and retreat to the "safety" of the Pyramid, though we don't learn this until- The Colonial Marines arrive. Answering the distress call and at the behest of the Company the Marines are sen to investigate this rock which as it turns out is the usual Stage Two for the Predators who survive the Antarctic Stage One Pyramid. So everything is much harder on this level and the "Boss" is much meaner, so I guess Two Queen Aliens? Maybe one Red-Brown and one BlueBlack and the different alien strains don't like each other much either. There see I just ripped off the comics writers (of I think it was Hive War or something, ah I looked it up it was Aliens:Genocide) and set it to the basic structure of a videogame. Now we have a few miners to save and Aliens to fight Predators to be hunted by and team with and we're travelling on a solid lump of frozen gas that will explode if it is compromised. Stakes = high. Originality = low. But come on I'd rather watch this version, even though I know exactly how it ends because I just made it up. I could honestly film this version in and around New South Wales for about US $8Million but let's say $16Million just to be sure. If someone wants to pay me studio money to write this shit up I'll not say no, I'm not even that attached to it as I haven't nursed it at all so if you want to give me studio notes that say change the miners to Lingerie models whose cruiser got stranded on their way to a photoshoot on New Seychelles then that's fine with me. Now this storyline is not what I would have written for my ultimate AVP film if left to my own devices but I understand that the rules of this franchise have been set and that Fox is trying to keep costs down, I'm only trying to help. Fox if you want me Doc knows how to find me. I guess I might as well shout copyright (for the bits I didn't steal, I mean homage, from Dark Horse Comics) even though I wouldn't mind this version being stolen if it could save us all from Salerno's abomination. (littlegreyalien at hotmail dot com)
April 24, 2006, 7:46 a.m. CST
All those caveman flicks. They seem dumb now, but most directors nowadays couldn't direct something with no speech as they've seemingly lost the ability to communicate through visuals. Everything has to be packaged and offered up to the viewer in soundbites.
April 24, 2006, 7:49 a.m. CST
Turn those initial marines into a salvage crew exploring a wreck in space orbiting a planet and you're on. Fuck yeah! The salvage guys find a portal to the seemingly hostile world below - under the clouds lies a world inhabited by beasts for seeding by the Predators. Or some such shit. I've always wanted to see those salvage peeps used properly as an initial plot device. Could be creepy as fuck and a throwback to the ghost-house of the old film.
April 24, 2006, 7:55 a.m. CST
by Kid Z
... the Alien chest-bursters give their hosts colonoscopies. They're ugly li'l proctologists... or maybe space gerbils on a journey to find the Sparrow King.... yeah, uhm, rright! Why do all aliens seem to have such a fasination with the human digestive and excretory system???
April 24, 2006, 7:56 a.m. CST
April 24, 2006, 8:08 a.m. CST
I assume they won't show the Predators home planet because it would be too expensive to make that film. This script has low budget written all over it. What would be cool is to have the Predators take the Predalien to the Predators home world. Allow the Predalien to grow to adulthood, teach it. then maybe reinsert this hybrid onto the Aliens home world. The Predators don't feel like an Alien is much of a hunting challenge to them anymore so this ups the ante quite a bit. Maybe the Aliens will accept this hybrid as their leader.
April 24, 2006, 8:15 a.m. CST
and I am sue half the people in here could have done something more orginal
April 24, 2006, 8:20 a.m. CST
Will this movie be any good? Almost certainly not. Will it make the studio a profit? Almost certainly. That is all that matters in mainstream film. Once you realize this inescapable truth, you will be less angry about the inevitability of schlock like AvP2.
April 24, 2006, 8:21 a.m. CST
...you'd think Drew himself wrote it. I have no doubts that it's terrible, but having read a ton of McWeeny's screenplays I have to say that if there's an authority of shitty hack screenwriting, it's him. This sounds as bad as the one about the tenth-rate X-MEN or the Roland Emmerich rip-off or...god...I can't remember them all. I never thought I would literally see a Pot calling a kettle black but I just did. Also, the fact that Salerno--by all accounts a retarded middle-schooler-- wrote the script for the Soon To Be A Failed Motion Picture MEG, from the Nick Nunziata production house of sub-literate half-assed idiocy...man, what a sun-shiney day I just woke up to. The national internet douche level is at Pea Green. Anybody but Drew should have written this review. It would have gone done with a far more honest sense. Again, I'm 100% sure he's right about it. But what was he thinking?? Or maybe the Mad Professor did it knowing full well he'd stir the pot. That what those evil geniuses do when they aren't writing WATCHMAN rip-off TV show proposals. Good one, Drew. You pulled off a good one today bud. I owe you a brew.
April 24, 2006, 8:33 a.m. CST
Like you said, maybe not the most original idea, but a fuckload better than the shit we'll be getting. What really makes me sad and furious in equal measure is the fact that the Fox morons think they're playing it safe and maximizing their profits and are completely oblivious to the fact that YOUR idea would make them a hell of a lot more money and not rape the franchises in the process. Their stupidity is astounding. I'm not usually a violent man, but I find myself entertaining fantasies of actually visiting physical harm upon these cretins, with lots of taser and truncheon action involved.
April 24, 2006, 8:37 a.m. CST
Sounds to me like everyone on AICN can't wait to see this movie!
April 24, 2006, 8:41 a.m. CST
Like what Superman Returns is going to do with that series. Make a new Alien movie with Sigourney Weaver that takes place 20 years after the events of Aliens, and make like Alien 3 and Alien: Resurrection never happened.
April 24, 2006, 8:43 a.m. CST
who the fuck needs to see a bunch of humans involved? Not me that's for sure. Fucking studio crackheads. Idiots.
April 24, 2006, 8:48 a.m. CST
If not for the sake of his career then maybe for his life. Trekkies have glorified remotes - Alienfans have smartguns...
April 24, 2006, 8:56 a.m. CST
...I have to admit also hating the idea of seeing the Alien or Predator homeworld. We don't NEED to see it because it would rob the creatures of some of their mystery. After 20 years of imagining what kind of hideous place could breathe the acid-bleeders, there's no way they could do it justice. I prefer never seeing it or even knowing if they developed through evolution or are just an ancient, interstellar bioweapon run amuck. Same goes for the Preds. It's much cooler just seeing glimpses of their technology and culture than getting the full picture. Like their cloaking devices, it seems fitting that their home is veiled from us. Besides, it feels vaguely more threatening knowing that no matter how many we wipe out, there could be a whole world of them out there that we'll never find.
April 24, 2006, 8:58 a.m. CST
WTF? I meant "breed".
April 24, 2006, 8:59 a.m. CST
There's a sitcom in there somewhere.
April 24, 2006, 9:03 a.m. CST
Nowadays I hear he can breathe without a machine on a good day. Man, I wish Salerno had the balls to come in here and try to defend this piece of shit like he did -- not that the outcome would be any different. Good times, good times...
April 24, 2006, 9:15 a.m. CST
if its a piece of shit and people buy tickets, then fox will make another and they MIGHT get it right. but if its a piece of shit and makes NO money...well bye-bye franchises.
April 24, 2006, 9:16 a.m. CST
by 'Cholera's Ghost
I've thought the same thing. Spelling out the details behind the Alien origins and Predator civilization isn't that great of an idea unless by some earth shattering miracle someone has a breathtakingly mind-blowing concept for that kind of thing. The potential scariness and intrigue is way more effective without the exposition, and will almost certainly leave fans happier without it (not that with scripts like this it does much good). But whatever the case: Preserve the mystery, Hollywood. Preserve the mystery. Oh, and as you can tell, I think about this kind of thing a lot because unlike about 90% of other upcoming movies, I actually care about what happens with Alien and Predator.
April 24, 2006, 9:26 a.m. CST
by Mr Nice Gaius
"My God...". Mori and Gang, this is dread, man. Truly dread. Unfriggin'believable. Gee, it's not like both franchises weren't wounded enough already. But this is just DUMB and FOX should be ashamed of themselves. If this script becomes a filmed reality, it's a lock that Cameron and Scott won't go anywhere near the "Alien" franchise again.
April 24, 2006, 9:35 a.m. CST
citizen kane 2? get off ur high horse already
April 24, 2006, 9:41 a.m. CST
by Rant Breath
If AvP makes a shitload of money, Hollywood learns nothing and they continue mass producing shit. If nobody goes to see AvP, Fox will realize they fucked up but will probably end both franchises. Game over man. Game over.
April 24, 2006, 9:42 a.m. CST
I liked the first movie and so did a lot of people, so piss and moan all you want but i bet every single poster here is going to see this film.
April 24, 2006, 9:43 a.m. CST
Besides the obvious ways the fans would take this franchise (cool & special) and besides the ways the studios WILL take it...... I wonder if there's not some middle ground which has not been looked at. I mean, Alien 1 & 3 follow the same dark shadows fomula. Alien 2 & 4 follow the same action team shoot em up formula. Predator 1, 2 & 3 (AVP) follow the same humans caught in extraterestrial skermish. Perhaps there is some NEW way to take these film. Here's my first suggestion. Predator without the Alien and Alien without the Predator.
April 24, 2006, 9:46 a.m. CST
I couldn't imagine anything this deadful ever making it into theaters. I could see it as a D2DVD the final breeding ground for franchise milking. I could write a better script with one eye closed. Give me 5K (about what I make in a couple of weeks) and I could come up with something 100 times better than a rehash of 8-Legged Freaks, Dawn of the Dead, Critters, Tremors,etc. And I hate the whole hybrid thing. I hated the evil pasty baby hybrid in Alien 4. Why would the Predator Alient result in a hybrid anyway? The things are parasites. They use insides as incubators and food, not gene splicers. Yep, it'd be set in the future with Colonial Marines, maybe some stupid colonists (as well as a couple of babes y'know -- maybe a tough but extremely sexy marine chick, and a beautiful young colonist who survived the alien infestation along with her dad, but is still suffering from post traumatic shock syndrome), More Predators, and those nasty alien hives. No alliances. A well-earner, go back to the censors 5 times, R rating of course (the better, sexier version would be on the DVD release, with 10 of additional footage). Yeah, the production budget would have to be at least $100 million, and you need to have a couple of celebrity names above the movie title to sell tickets and give the franchise cred that it's not another worthless milking. Vin Diesel needs a hit to get back into the action genre. Basically he'd get the Arnold role, with an edge. For your supporting roles, there are a bevy of starlets for the females -- maybe Lindsay Lohan could take on one. Then you'd need a pretty boy 20s actor who'd be the moral compass, a popular rapper to play the cool marine, and a WWF wrestler to go mano a mano with one of the predators, in a heroic effort to buy his squad some escape time, but then a bunch of aliens show up, and for just a second, the human and predator decide to stop fighting each other and take on the five aliens in their final fights. Give the marines some extra hardware (aliens did have the futuristic version of "old painless"). This one would be tense, sometimes claustrophobic (like the original alien), and very fast moving. And they need to go back to the original on the Predator costumes. In the last movie they looked like lumbering bodybuilders in overpadded suits. You need leaner 7-footers in there. Because by the time all the padding is added, these guys will look far more natural. The end of the day, the marines win, but not after taking heavy casualties. The aliens are oblitherated, but no one knows how many colonies exist on other worlds (no need for the surprise chest popping ending), and one Predator escapes, but he's happy because in the back his craft, he's got a human skull and an alien skull -- for him, the hunt was a success). Okay, that's my 10-minutes of work.
April 24, 2006, 9:47 a.m. CST
To paraphrase Ripley, kill this franchise, please.
April 24, 2006, 9:51 a.m. CST
Oh, I'll see it for sure, but I'll be goddamned if I pay one fucking dime to do so if it turns out anything like this leprous, sebaceous piece of shit of a script indicates. In fact, I'll download it and make tons of copies which I will provide -- free of charge -- to anyone I know who is entertaining the notion of paying money to see it. Can you feel the hate, Fox?
April 24, 2006, 9:52 a.m. CST
I've got every single Alien and Predator film on DVD & VHS. I've got the soundtracks and the toys. I DON'T have anything remotely AVP except for some old comics. I've seen the film once and that was in it's last screening days. I am one of the few to disagree with you - I will probably NOT see AVP2.
April 24, 2006, 9:53 a.m. CST
...when the real Bishop died, although he appeared much later in the future, at the end of Alien 3. :P
April 24, 2006, 10 a.m. CST
Now THAT would be cool. But too early.
April 24, 2006, 10:05 a.m. CST
The movie tanked at the box office. It only made real money (like most action flicks do) on DVD. If was nominally watchable, but in no way expanded on either franchise IMO (predators worshipped as gods -- uh huh, and why -- nice shot though). I actually like the Lathan girl to a degree, but she wasn't Ripley. The rest of the cast was easily forgettable, and obviously expendable. The Predators looked like three plodding linebackers. The Aliens, what you saw of them, was nothing new (it's like they were pulled out of the prop dept. closet). Yeah, I'll probably see AvP2 if it's made following this script ... WHILE I'm flipping through channels and happen to catch a couple of minutes of it on sci-fi channel or HBO. Anyone who thinkgs this will bring in droves of theatre-goers don't understand why people go to movies.
April 24, 2006, 10:09 a.m. CST
by Mr Nice Gaius
Ha, Ha! I laugh at you. I didn't care for the first AVP. And after reading this script review, I sure as hell don't give a damn about the second one. I will not be seeing this ridiculousness. You can call it "pissing and moaning" all you like. I call it rejoicing. Rejoicing in the fact that I'll save myself $10.
April 24, 2006, 10:13 a.m. CST
Yeah I'd rather see the predators home planet, aliens home planet, anything then just more face huggers and cool predator weapons. But lets face it, the first AvP ruined any chance of that since the AvP timeline is too close to our present. Now its just turning into some pg-13 non-bloody semi horror flick. Fuck PG-13 , jeezus crips!!! wtf is going on here!!
April 24, 2006, 10:22 a.m. CST
A rogue group of Gonzos from "Muppets In Space" swoop in to break up the fight and teach intergalactic tolerance. Also, some shit about the letter "C."
April 24, 2006, 10:33 a.m. CST
Thats exactly what I thought when I saw AVP. How the hell can Bishop die unless the one who met with ripley in Alien 3 was an android as well. For the record, I actually like the directors cut of Alien 3 a lot. The only problem is that at the end, the queen doesnt burst out of ripley's chest, which was so cool.
April 24, 2006, 10:35 a.m. CST
Actually, there WAS an Aliens vs Predator vs Terminator 4-part comic which kicked the shit out of this fucking script. And it took place in the future. In space. With Ripley.
April 24, 2006, 10:35 a.m. CST
I didn't totally hate AVP, but it wasn't any good. But seriously. We're at 7 films now with these different characters. And we have yet to see either one's home planet.
April 24, 2006, 10:43 a.m. CST
Set it on an alien planet with a giant Alien hive, which has been set up by the Predators for traditional "rite of passage" hunts. Have a crack special team of Marines being sent to the planet at the same time, after being told by the Company that the Alien Queen's royal jelly is a form of super penicillin to fight off new strains of infectious bacteria. Meanwhile, the truth is that the jelly is a super narcotic that the company wishes to have every human addicted to. This way we keep the "Company fucks everyone over" aspect of the first three Alien films. The team gets inside the hive and has just captured one of those queen facehuggers from the assembly cut of Alien 3 when they realize what's really going on. Just as they start to make their way out, the Predators show up and they start getting taken out. We end up with a small handful of marines, a small handful of younger Predators with one older, and a lot of Aliens. Big action sequences occur. Everyone is happy. Box office take is about $500 million with DVD sales at least doubling that. Know what the best thing is? Even with a "can't miss" scenario like that, Fox would never, ever do it. Thanks for not even making sense, studio system.
April 24, 2006, 10:45 a.m. CST
by Mr Nice Gaius
Wasn't there a comic where Hicks and Newt (several years later) lead an assault on the newly discovered alien homeworld? Hicks was much older and battle-scarred and Newt had become a turbo-hottie. The storyline obviously ignored their deaths in "Alien 3" but at least it read better than this miserable excuse of a script.
April 24, 2006, 10:46 a.m. CST
I agree with so many above that the scant tantalising clues are so much more fun than seeing the way they live at home. Who the hell wants to see their daily lives? It's like seeing what John McClane was doing the day before he spent Christmas at the Nakatomi building, it's not a story. It's far more interesting to observe them 'doing' rather than just 'being'. I also don't want to know too much about the Alien's genesis, hints, but nothing more. Also, while I'm thinking about it, the Alien in the last few films has become too organic and is straying too far from the hideously beautiful biomechanical designs of Giger.
April 24, 2006, 10:55 a.m. CST
Why didn't they just base the AVP movies off of the comic books?!
April 24, 2006, 10:56 a.m. CST
Just think of this for a moment. You have a whole universe to play with in front of you, ANY idea you could use, but you decide to make Tremors meets (insert any flick that is set in a Texan town) with Aliens and Predators thrown in. This SUCKS. It's in serious need of a COMPLETE RETHINK. There's no point in saying 'just don't do the movie' because $200 million for AVP1 means it's happening as sure as buttfuck whether we fucking like it or not. Many of the people around here could come up with a better story and script. I know I could and I've never written a script. What I would do is make Predator 3. Get Arnold in. Follow the 'continuity' of AVP if needs must.
April 24, 2006, 11:03 a.m. CST
We all agree that AVP was written by a nine year old. Directed by some one, who it felt like, had no love for either franchise. And then this.The original idea I heard for AVP was set on the Predator home world - now we are to believe they want us to digest Cross-breeding aliens, which is wrong. Cos the alien egg is inplanted into it's host as an incubator. If cross breeding was possible, wouldn't we of had man/alien hybrids in alien 1- 4. In Alien Ressurection they had to clone and modify - not have some thing just burst out of a chest all hey presto like! And to set it in modern Texas is not only a cop out but smells of cheapness to me. Why build grandoise sets of alien homeworlds and magnificiant scnery of alien planets when we can get corporate funds to base it in WalMart and have hundreds of products in the background. Is this so they can easily tie all the merchandise in with the movie? Since 1979 til now we've waited for the Alien saga to 'go back to basics' see how it all began - where they come from, how the Predatos came across them? But what do we get instead? Get into space - get as far away from earth as possible - in fact do we need humans at all? And for fucks sake keep Anderson a million miles from this and get the cheque book out and sign up Cameron to helm this. Gabba Gabba hey :)
April 24, 2006, 11:03 a.m. CST
I'm late to the TB punch on this one. How about we *see* the franchise working it's way through a studio exec's lower intestine until he poops it out and markets it as really good cinema?
April 24, 2006, 11:04 a.m. CST
by 'Cholera's Ghost
Don't really grasp the pressing need to combine the franchises in the movies, even though I enjoyed the AvP games a whole hell of a lot. The concept does work for action gaming, but on film I for one don't care about seeing the two go at it because it's a little too gimmicky for people to seem to write a decent plot around. It's the kind of thing Weaver talked about being scared of, and she was right. I'd rather have standalones given some decent weightiness reminiscent of the good old days. Predator 3 on colonial Mars or something and Alien 5, future Earth, and I would be about infinity times happier than I am right now.
April 24, 2006, 11:07 a.m. CST
by Mr Nice Gaius
According to Rotten Tomatoes, the release date for this baby is August 10, 2007. If this is the script that they're rolling with, my sincere condolences go out to the crew.
April 24, 2006, 11:08 a.m. CST
"I liked the first movie, and so did a lot of people"......Yes, those people were you, and anyone related to Paul W.S. Anderson. No, scratch that, even his family fucking hated it. So you my friend are the only one who liked it on the planet Earth. And the fact that you will see THIS aborted piece of colon sewage suggests that God should strike you down, instead of kittens, every time someone masturbates, or watches AVP.
April 24, 2006, 11:08 a.m. CST
AND FUCK FOX WHILE WE'RE AT IT
April 24, 2006, 11:14 a.m. CST
that got loose, ala Stitch. I can't imagine a homeworld where these things are laughing, loving, and living.
to the ruins of New Orleans after the flood.
April 24, 2006, 11:14 a.m. CST
This would be funny if it wasn't a tragic waste of two of moviedoms greatest creations. I think half the people who post on here could write a better script treatment on the back of fag packet than the shit you've just reporterted. Time for a rethink and a less aggressive release date giving a decent movie maker time to come up with something less retarded. I'd rather see Abbot and Costello meet AVP than this shit :(
April 24, 2006, 11:20 a.m. CST
by Childe Roland
Read like Ebert's most recent Star Trek movie review, but with more vitriol. Funny, though. And kudos on maintaining a sense of humor about the whole Mortal Kombat thing. If anything, your involvement with that franchise imminently qualifies you to identify the rape of a concept in process. So I trust your judgement on this one. On the actual script...I wonder if the aliens actually ingest fecal matter on their trips through the intestinal tract? That would explain their attitudes upon emergence. And did I just miss it or is at least one of the three aliens this pred is chasing around Texas the predalien? And, if so, does that make the other two part pred/part alien/part human? I know the aliens have traditionally taken on some of the characteristics of their hosts, but are those traits cumulative in subsequent generations? Are there dominant and recessive expressions (I'd assume Predator genes to be dominant)? These are exactly the kind of geeky questions I'd have loved to see explored if they were going the whole Discovery channel route with these species. In fact, I'd rather watch two hours of narrated "the mating habits of Aliens" or "Predators: the Lock on the Food Chain" documentaries on cable (in HD, of course) than spend another minute suffering through a poorly hashed together narrative featuring either species. The first two films of both franchises were good (I'd argue Alien is objectively one of the greatest horror films of all time). But they took a serious downturn in Alien 3 and I'd rather not get into it with the requisite Whedon defenders on the complete absence of relative merits that was Ressurection. AVP is a joke of a franchise and, if it's going to make it official with a Tremors-esque southwestern setting and local her-schmoes, it might as well get itself a laugh track.
April 24, 2006, 11:20 a.m. CST
exciting directors. Who could bring something different to each film. Maybe thats why theyre being so safe with alien vs predator. The mess ups with alien 3 and 4 scared them into playing it safe with paul anderson and his pg13s
April 24, 2006, 11:23 a.m. CST
They should just make this into live action: http://www.newgrounds.com/portal/view/222192
April 24, 2006, 11:24 a.m. CST
Not that they'll do anything to stop the movie from being made, mind you. Even though the script is terrible, even though none of us (their market) is happy, even though we all know - before they've even hired a director - that the film will be garbage, they STILL don't give a shit. FANTASTIC FOUR, AVP, X3 (I hope I'm wrong and that one) and now THIS SHIT? I will not be seeing this film - at the cinema or on DVD. Fuck FOX. Seriously - fuck them.
April 24, 2006, 11:24 a.m. CST
...for the appearance of strange new talkbackers with unfamiliar names who suddenly pop up here and say things like "I don't know, let's give this a chance, guys! It sounds like it will kick ass!" You know the type: leafy green and creatively bankrupt lickspittles sent out by their diabolical greedy studio whoremasters for damage control. Like the guy who wrote that mindboggling Doom review.
April 24, 2006, 11:38 a.m. CST
by Mr Nice Gaius
The moment I see a TB handle like "AVPIIrulez", I'm outta here...
April 24, 2006, 11:40 a.m. CST
Or, if not good, at least it is what the geeky fans deserve. What kind of clown gets excited about Alien vs Predator in the first place? The same people that were excited about Freddy vs Jason and Superman vs Batman, I suppose. Losers, all!!! The script is glorious!!!
April 24, 2006, 11:47 a.m. CST
by 'Cholera's Ghost
"Wait, Dallas...I think...I think it's in the SEASONAL AISLE! Oh my god!!!"
April 24, 2006, 11:56 a.m. CST
One of the loudest, greatest Large popcorn n medium sized coke movies ever made!! And then..we had the news that they where making ST2..I was over the moon (pardon the cliche)..But it was on VHS only. I went to Blockbuster to rent it and the guy took it off me ,shook his head and told me to not waste my time and money. I saw it on tv recently and was ashamed for myself, I felt violated. And, with AVP2 I'm getting deja vu - AVP was 'shite but almost bareable in parts' but I fear AVP2 is going to be some PG13 laughter inducing pile of steaming shite that will sour my view of all the other movies built up over twenty years.Knowing full well what could of been and what it has become. Fox will not take heed of it's fan base- it will make this or something similiar cos it's cost efficiant and can be put straight to dvd if needed and then bundle it as a 'double pack' with AVP 1 or add it to a bulging Aliens Boxset. If ANYONE at Fox had an ounce of passion for either Alien or Predator movies, they would of not green lighted AVP1 never mind this.. It's all about the Benjamins and they have no shame how they get them.
April 24, 2006, 11:58 a.m. CST
WE all really want AVP2 to be as cool as Predator and the first 2 Alien Movies. Don't get me wrong Predator 2 is cool as shit and gave us the chance to see a AVP; and Alien3 and Alien Resurrection felt kinda shitty but defintely had some kick ass moments like the man said. But to see these characters become parodies of themselves is just a waste of time.
April 24, 2006, 12:01 p.m. CST
on one hand, im an aliens and predator fan, on the other, i know paul anderson isnt much of a director. i got 30 minutes into it and i havent been back since.
April 24, 2006, 12:03 p.m. CST
by Johnny Wishbone
Seriously though, this sounds uber-shit.
April 24, 2006, 12:06 p.m. CST
FUCKING SPACE... COLONIAL MARINES... HOME PLANETS... THE FUCKING FUTURE!!!! HOW goddamn fucking hard is it? Is it so fucking difficult? Each and every one of us could write a better script than this fucking disaster. And last I checked, we're the people that are interested in this franchise. But instead, Hollywood is basically shitting on a storied franchise, developed by some of the best genre writers and directors of our time, by giving us this saccharine, boring, lazy fucking BULLSHIT. It's not fucking rocket science, people. Yet another way for Hollywood to tell fans to go fuck themselves. The first AVP was a goddamn atrocity, this is gonna be the cinematic equivalent of a fucking war crime. Hey, Hollywood - GO FUCK YOURSELF. OK, I'm calm, I'm calm. DON'T FUCKING TOUCH ME!
April 24, 2006, 12:07 p.m. CST
That's the real definition of a "good" horror script in Hollywood. Nobody's going to throw KONG money at this project. This script sounds like they could shoot it for $35 million or less. That makes it the best script the studio has ever seen. Nobody cares about the story, because we're talking about ALIEN VS. PREDATOR II here. But by the way, what's wrong with the original Predator premise, Mack? Alien big-game hunters come to Earth to hunt humans on safari. Nice little high concept premise.
April 24, 2006, 12:10 p.m. CST
Citizen Fucking Kane. "FUCKING SPACE... COLONIAL MARINES... HOME PLANETS... THE FUCKING FUTURE!!!!" That's more like "20 million...40 million...60 million...80 million!" and they don't have enough faith in a crossover franchise to pay that kind of money [probably very wisely]. They want to make a big screen version of Mansquito.
April 24, 2006, 12:23 p.m. CST
The major reason (and there are many) is that they took two great R rated franchises and made a PG-13 movie out of them. I know it was the marketing dept (it has to be for the widest possible audience), but when I was under 17 I snuck into R rated films half the time, and my father would buy tickets for me the other half. STOP LETTING MARKETING DEPT'S MAKE MOVIES!
April 24, 2006, 12:38 p.m. CST
"The three remaining Aliens sneak up on and begin to devour beefywhore...this takes several hours because he's a portly gentleman... this gives the predator time to devise a plan...he gathers all the children in the small town (childrens laughter is the only thing lethal to an Alien in this particular chapter of the franchise) they fill all of their super-soakers with baking soda water (to neutralize the acid blood) and thus begins the most brutal battle between Aliens and 8 year olds in the history of motion pictures...
April 24, 2006, 12:53 p.m. CST
Thats a fucking tag team match. Just bring in Vince McMahon and the wrestling ring and get it over with. Shit, when I think of AvP, I think of swarms of aliens battling AN ARMY OF PREDATORS! I think of predators piloting fighterships all star wars style against Colonial Marines. Stupid fucking greedy Fox execs. Anything to save a buck. Dumb shits wouldn't know a good story if it came up and bit'em in the ass. Do us a favor Fox, AND GIVE US THE FUCKING WAR WE WANNA SEE! Not some backwoods Celebrity Deathmatch.
April 24, 2006, 12:58 p.m. CST
I also thought of that McTiernan joke. But AvP1 sucked balls. And that "What cannot adapt, becomes extinct."-line is a clever line for the trailer that will probably fall flat in the actual movie. Just like that 'What did you do?' 'I died' exchange in Resurrection.
April 24, 2006, 1:03 p.m. CST
by I Dunno
same. A bunch of people trapped in an enclosed space and being chased by Aliens. No real attempt at expanding that with the exception of the lame ass pyramid shit in AvP. But now I know that the writers for these things just suck.
April 24, 2006, 1:05 p.m. CST
by Lost Skeleton
...fuck Rothman and fuck Fox for real
April 24, 2006, 1:07 p.m. CST
They say the box office is slipping and DVD sales have flattened out and this is the reason why movies are not making money anymore. This is why Hollwyood is looking for sure things.... I say bullshit. What Mori just discussed is the problem. Hollywood has no vision and has no balls. Everyone in the studio system is terrified of losing their jobs by taking any kind of a risk. It's sad and it's not getting any better. Seeing what they want this sequel to be is a slap in the face of any fan who buys DVD's, games and tickets. But here's the thing -- all of you fans out here screaming and yelling will still pay to go see this crap. Don't tell me you won't, because you will. Enough of you were dumb enough to go see the first one in this "series" to warrant this awful concept of a sequel. I avoided the movie and have still avoided it since it showed up on cable. I know the first one is a piece of shit and I know any subsequent one will also be, unless they show some vision and bring in a real screenwriter and a director who doesn't want to make video game mashup the movie. They need a storyteller. Cameron knocked it out of the park. Ridley was a visionary. Why did studio execs in the 80's have the vision to know how to handle these kind of projects. It seems like once 1990 hit, everyone forgot how awesome movies can be. Maybe it is that we are spoiled and we've seen it all so we're jaded...but I think not. Peter Jackson made me feel like a kid again watching the Lord of Rings trilogy. The difference between that and this piece of dreck is immeasurable. There a filmmaker looked to get the storytelling right. He looked to get it right on the page and right on the screen. This sequel looks to get your money. If you have any heart and love movies and Fox goes through with this sequel as scripted, don't go. Let this have a bomb opening. Don't buy the games. Don't buy the DVD's. If you really need to see it, download it. The movie going public has already started sending a message to the studios that we think most of the product they put out is crap. We need to really band together and not go see Dukes of Hazzard, Alien Vs Predator and all the other worthless shit we all know will suck. And for the record Fox execs who may read this -- Do better. You were the studio that did the original two and distributed the original Star Wars trilogy. Try harder than this. Forget about the budget until you have an amazing script that demands to be filmed. Then find the right director. Not Paul fucking Anderson. Do better than this and you will be rewarded.
April 24, 2006, 1:08 p.m. CST
April 24, 2006, 1:16 p.m. CST
Yeah and that's my fuckin fist in their fuckin face. I mean it. Here's my address: 1900 N Highland, Hollywood, CA 90068. COME ON DOWN AND TASTE THE RAW ANGER OF A TRUE FAN. These greedy bastards ... how many producers were on AVP? 18? Everybody wants it share outta this and outta that. G R E E D Y F U C K E R S Aren't these fartknockers listening? I am mad as hell and I won't take it anymore.
April 24, 2006, 1:24 p.m. CST
by Sly Fox
Well after the first one I wasn't expecting much but the sequel sounds like it'll be 10 times worse! I don't think we'll get another Alien or Predator film for at least 10 years if they let this peice of crap get made :(
April 24, 2006, 1:30 p.m. CST
From the looks of it, this script looks like it was written by an amateur fanboy who grew up watching the Scary Movie franchise and Sci-Fi Saturday night movies. Here's a hint for you retard: Write a film about aliens and/or predators in space, like on their home planets or something. Grow some cojones, think up some awesome space battle shit, and put it on paper. A few reasons why the original films still have followers: both franchises are exotic ventures into two alien cultures. Separately, both can stand on their own. Together, they can rock. The basic story from the first AvP where the Predators held an Alien queen captive for ritual hunt purposes made sense. But the AvP film didn't have a lot of gusto in exploring why humans are in the middle of an ancient war between the two species. Instead we got a PG13 teeniebopper friendly mercenaries are pussies borefest. I want R rated action with a lot of backstory explaining why their will be a lot of carnage and destruction. Keep this francise off of Earth and I guarentee you that it will be better than it being set on Earth. ___KNEEL___
April 24, 2006, 1:51 p.m. CST
Just kidding. It sounds like shit. It sounds like an April Fool's joke. The fact that even the one person who typed the shit up thought it was acceptable is amazing. This is the most unanimous talkback I've ever seen. I know alot of talkbackers are angry and negative whiners, but when there's a talkback this long and it's 100% unanimous, you know there's a problem with the basic premise of the fucking thing. Seriously, the closest thing to a defense of the movie is a cynical "yeah it sounds horrible and offensive but you know we're all gonna be spineless scumsucking corporate whores and pay our 9 bucks to watch it, because we have no integrity or pride as human beings." Chin up fellas. You don't have to take this shit. Don't do it. If they make this movie, don't ever watch it. I know it takes self control, but it can be done. I love them old ALIEN movies and I didn't want to ruin it so I never watched that kiddy flick with the predators. And I am a better person for it spiritually and mentally. I recommend it to all of you. When it comes to aliens wrestling predators, abstinence is the way to go.
April 24, 2006, 1:51 p.m. CST
by I Dunno
The issue is that the moviemaking process has been taken over by business people. I'm not naive enough to think that filmmaking was ever not about money but the process has been distilled to a bottom line business formula with business type rules that include only going with a proven concept with a built in audience. Hence all the remakes. Then you have these buzzwords that have been coming up in the last few years like "reimagining", "reinventing" and "tentpole franchise" that you never heard before. That's the work of marketing worms right there. Of course Hollywood was all about making money but there was a little art in there too. Do you think you're ever going to see another original Star Wars, Dark City or even The Matrix again? Not likely. Not unless they remake them.
April 24, 2006, 1:55 p.m. CST
...maybe FOX will take notice if we send complaints. I doubt they are reading this forum...at least not yet. Send your complaint to fox at: firstname.lastname@example.org or snail mail at 20th Century Fox, PO Box 900, Beverly Hills, CA 90213. With scripts like that it might be better to bury the story for a few years and start over later. I'd be willing to wait for something good.
April 24, 2006, 1:56 p.m. CST
by I Dunno
I didn't see the first AvP until it came on cable because I read the script and it sucked. I've seen maybe 10 movies in the theater this (and last) year, a few of them because I was on a date and wanted to get laid. There's no reason to mindlessly copitulate to seeing this shit, except for the getting laid part. That of course supercedes any idealistic love of film.
April 24, 2006, 2 p.m. CST
I never even saw AVP1, and I'm embarrassed that so many people did. What happened to the possibility of Ridley Scott returning to do one last Alien film that ties it all together? Personally, I'd just assume the entire two franchises die, but Scott's involvement would be better than this smelly taint.
April 24, 2006, 2 p.m. CST
Last time around AvP had a lot of detractors but the concept had a lot of defenders as well, and I'll admit I was one of them. This time around there don't seem to be any defenders of the project. I actually spent money on the first one, but not this time, baby. You hear that, Fox? You've gone and made me a genuine bootlegger of a legitimate studio release for the first time ever. Not only will I download it for free and burn copies, I'll give them out at no charge to anyone I suspect of even having the slightest inclination of giving you their cash in order to see it. Suck it, Fox.
April 24, 2006, 2:01 p.m. CST
by I Dunno
When the Star Trek 10 script came out, people were furious and there was a huge letter writing campaign. That didn't stop Paramount from filming it anyway, releasing it right between Harry Potter and Lord of the Rings, no less. If the Trekkie psychos are inneffectual, what chance does anyone else have? The people running the bizz are coked up morons. The only way to change things is to work from within, which I think a lot of us are trying to do.
April 24, 2006, 2:07 p.m. CST
A few of you have posted the 'setting in space/future/home planet would cost too much as a reason for this abomination of a script but i'm not buying it. Aliens cost peanuts and still looks fantastic today. What's more likely is the fact the franchise is so tied up with 20 million producers all wanting their cut they want to get it out as quickly and cheaply as possible and clean up on the home market like the last avp. I cant bring myself to hate the first crossover as it one of my guilty secret pleasures but even I could see where the rot set in. Do it properly or dont do it at all. Get Ridley Scott/Cameron back there not pubicly against another film (didn't Cameron even say he didn't mind the AVP film) And I swaer if Giger is not involved this time I will be very cross lol
April 24, 2006, 2:07 p.m. CST
already ACCOMPLISHED with this draft. Seriously, this sounds like a bad fucking crappy parody. Moriarty, is it possible that you read the script for ScaryMovie 5? I mean it is possible right? Right? C'mon Mori...;) I know it. It must be a ScaryMovie sequel based on AVP. Puh i'm relieved now...and i almost believed that this was an article on AVP2, lol
April 24, 2006, 2:08 p.m. CST
"I Dunno"...at least it's worth a try to write, I just sent my e-mail to FOX. Do I expect an answer, no, not really...but at least I sent them my opinion. At least I feel a little better, I would think they might take notice of a mailbox full of anti-AVPII e-mails with links to this forum...maybe...just maybe...FOX will take a look.
April 24, 2006, 2:08 p.m. CST
That's why I'm surprised that Moriarty would be giving him shit. Do you seriously think that when he got the assignment he wasn't told SPECIFICALLY "It has to be set on Earth, in a modern day setting it will be easy to do the locations for, and the maximum number of effects shots is 'X', the maximum number of creature shots is 'Y', and work in a K-Mart somehow"? You're damn right that's the assignment he got.
April 24, 2006, 2:12 p.m. CST
And that's back when $20 million was a first rate budget for a film. They could do another bottle script for you - frankly going the "3 aliens fighting 3 predators in rural Texas" is just a bottle script without the bottle.
April 24, 2006, 2:18 p.m. CST
by Mr. Profit
AvsP was a huge fucking joke. And this sequel sounds ready for the Sci-Fi channel. I saw the often hated Predator 2 the other day and to my surprise it wasn't as nearly as bad as what people said. Shit it was a hell of a lot better than AvsP. It's a shame 2 franchises who never really had a truly shitty outing have become this joke of a mash up. Fox is a big studio, why doulcn't they fucking hire someone with respect for the source material and some fucking talent?
April 24, 2006, 2:19 p.m. CST
by Mr. Profit
Did anyone notice by the end of Alien vs Predator that the movie turned into a sci fi version of Lethal Weapon?
April 24, 2006, 2:20 p.m. CST
by Rant Breath
It has to be the future where most of Earth is infested with aliens. The small part that isn't infested with aliens is controlled by the "the corporation". The corporation uses cybernetic space marines to protect the borders and claim new territory from the alien hives. This of course is an ideal hunting ground for younger, faster predators( unlike the fat, lumbering preds from AvP). These young predators must prove themselves worthy of adulthood. Out of a dozen or so only one can become worthy of adulthood the rest will be exiled on remote planets. The corporation's elite watch the predator "rites of passage" as entertaiment until they discover that a band of exiled predators want to start hunting them one by one. I could go on and on and on. What I described would cost no more than Revenge of the Sith which cost 110 mil but I'm sure it would make at least 300 mil if executed right. But go ahead your silly K-mart-predalien idea Fox. You fucking soulless shitbags.
April 24, 2006, 2:23 p.m. CST
Why are they enemies?
April 24, 2006, 2:41 p.m. CST
I didn't realise you could phone in a script... Just remake Critters but instead of *those* aliens, use *these* aliens... Good Grief!
April 24, 2006, 2:42 p.m. CST
by Mr Nice Gaius
You suck. Now, put the script down and walk away from this franchise like your marketing-ass lives depended on it. You have been warned - AICN's Hate-Fu is very strong...
April 24, 2006, 2:58 p.m. CST
How do we reach you Moriarity?? You are unlisted in the contact section of this website. Thank You.
April 24, 2006, 3:02 p.m. CST
by 'Cholera's Ghost
Feel the righteous Wrath and Despair! Oh, and you--yes you--you pimpled-assed Fox intern sitting there at your comfy desk with a set of instructions from your dark Masters commanding you to insert a tailored photosynthetic virus into the mix here...do you realize what we do to you? Can your cellulose-filled chloroplastic brain even comprehend the unparalleled abuse, the humiliation, the horror, the shame, the degradation, the utter mortification about to be leveled upon you? I can answer that for you right now. No. no you cannot. So go ahead. Hit that post button. Go right on ahead. Wipe that sweat trickling down your brow and do it...doooo it.
April 24, 2006, 3:10 p.m. CST
by Big Bad Clone
"Damnnn, that pussy face mother fucker just kill them Cips with a spear and a glowing frisbee. Aww hell nah, that big black monster with two mouths just ate some Bloods....And now some Latin Kings are trying to roll up in here" "Viva la Raza!" --- Terrible idea? Yes, but a million times more interesting than Predaliens stopping at a Dairy Queen in Texas (and if you name your kid Dallas and you live in Texas, I should have the right to shoot you)
April 24, 2006, 3:20 p.m. CST
April 24, 2006, 3:21 p.m. CST
April 24, 2006, 3:22 p.m. CST
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April 24, 2006, 3:27 p.m. CST
April 24, 2006, 3:28 p.m. CST
April 24, 2006, 3:29 p.m. CST
by 'Cholera's Ghost
April 24, 2006, 3:30 p.m. CST
April 24, 2006, 3:31 p.m. CST
I can only hope the massive negative attention it gets is enough to halt production and take it in an entirely different direction, ala Jurassic Park 4.
April 24, 2006, 3:32 p.m. CST
April 24, 2006, 3:41 p.m. CST
by Doom II
But when I read stuff like this and see what the top earing movies of the year, I realize it's true. US audiences DESERVE this shit. Keep buying tickets to this crap and that's what you'll all get. The day fanboys band together and boycott this crap (ala Batman & Robin) is the day Hollywood might actually re-think things a bit.
April 24, 2006, 3:45 p.m. CST
That script sounds like a 'Critters' sequel. But not as good, obviously.
April 24, 2006, 3:49 p.m. CST
Remember the time that the Alien franchise was actually considered prestige? This sounds like total genre crap when the Alien franchise was at one point about making great cinema - after the general failure of Alien 3 and AVP, they should have thought about once again trying to make great films with great young filmmakers with a new perspective...instead they gave it to Anderson and cheapened it - AVP wasn't beautiful in any way (at least the 3rd & 4th Alien films had young mad visionaries at the held even if they were held back by the studio) - if Fox are so concerned about the box office, give it to someone who respects the material and let them a great film - what these executive twats fail to realise that a great film can lead to a great opening weekend...it doesn't need to be substandard...hell, it might even stay at the top for more than one week (shock horror!).
April 24, 2006, 3:54 p.m. CST
I defy anyone to tell me they wouldn't see that.
April 24, 2006, 4:01 p.m. CST
by 'Cholera's Ghost
As he stares down the alien queen from his re-outfitted Dodge Ram, his Ranger badge gleaming..."Don't...mess...with Texas...you Bitch!" [hits gas pedal]
April 24, 2006, 4:03 p.m. CST
Is a Hack.
April 24, 2006, 4:18 p.m. CST
For instance, Osama Bin Laden was a huge Star Wars fan; however, when he saw Episode I he's hopes where lost and he went even more insane. What. You don't believe me?
April 24, 2006, 4:32 p.m. CST
Isnt the Motel Styx located just outside of Dallas? I think you are in a heap of trouble...
April 24, 2006, 4:39 p.m. CST
by Stan the Bat
I'm thinking maybe they should do an Ash vs. Freddy vs. Jason vs. Scooby Doo vs. Alien vs. Predator kind of a thing. Seriously, my sympathy for anybody who plans to view this turd is limited.
April 24, 2006, 4:48 p.m. CST
Who wants to bet they set it in Texas hoping Harry and all the Ain't it Coolers would hop on the PR bandwagon thinking how cool it would be to have the aliens and predators in their backyards? Misjudgement of the year, eh Fox? In any event -- we have the power to stop this from happening again and again. I'm serious, but you have to hold back and not go see this shit. You have to stop your friends from going to it (even when there is nothing better to do on a Friday and Saturday night) and you have to not get suckered in by the trailer which will promise you shit the movie won't deliver. We're all smarter than this and the only way to make them raise their game is to prove we're smarter than this. Don't give them any more of your money. To me, Alien vs Predator should not even be a series, but that's beside the point. The point is, this should be a space opera of Cameron proportions with human characters we actually give a damn about and some of the best action set pieces (because we all know you idiot fucking suits love your "set pieces") ever conceived. Duking it out on the Alien home planet or finally learning there is no home planet and perhaps the Alien's were created by humans as a bio-terror mechanism of war...anything would be better than Aliens in Kmart. Besides, they did the whole department store set piece in Gremlins already anyway.
April 24, 2006, 4:49 p.m. CST
Period! Nuff said... ooooh cunty.
April 24, 2006, 5:18 p.m. CST
by Alonzo Mosely
That would sell tickets...
April 24, 2006, 5:21 p.m. CST
No, not in the script but in the talkbalk. I love the idea of aliens infesting, say, New York, and The Company walling it off. And then the president's plane goes down and they send in Kurt Russell to rescue him. That would kick ass.
April 24, 2006, 5:31 p.m. CST
by Mr Nice Gaius
"All I know is that this Predator character comes out of thin air in the middle of a goddamn alley while his buddies are flying around on wires cutting everybody to shreds while he just STANDS there waiting for me to drive my truck straight through him with LIGHTS coming out of his eyes!!!"
April 24, 2006, 5:38 p.m. CST
OK Wang, we'll just CHEW our way outta this... alien cocoon.
April 24, 2006, 5:40 p.m. CST
...but i can't remember a single thing about it. No wait, i remember an alien got swung around by its tail. And thats it. Guess it didnt stick.
April 24, 2006, 5:41 p.m. CST
by Mr Nice Gaius
"Okay, I get the picture. Aliens, Colonial Marines, Predators in funny suits throwing plastic explosives while poison arrows fall from the sky and the pillars of heaven shake, huh? Sure. Okay. I see chestbreakers, face-huggers, and a hundred hissin' Alien Queens, and that's just for starters, right? Fine! I'm back! I'm ready, goddammit! Let me at 'em!!!"
April 24, 2006, 6:05 p.m. CST
Firstly, Mori and everyone else posting here has just lost all geek credibility for fixating on the name "Dallas Howard" without remembering that "Dallas" is the name of the captain of the Nostromo in the first Alien. Shame on all of ya... Secondly, this franchise would work much better if they had crossed it with a different Fox property. Imagine Sgt. John McClane, attacked again, only this time not by terrorists, but by Predators. Call it Predator 3: Die Hard or Die Hard 4: Predator or whatever, but Bruce Willis vs. alien hunters would've kicked all kinds of ass.
April 24, 2006, 6:07 p.m. CST
by George Newman
April 24, 2006, 6:27 p.m. CST
by frank cotton
came up with this in less time than it took to read the talkback: sometime in the future, we have a large colony on MARS terraforming the planet with W/Y equipment. Someone finds a wrecked spacecraft (if you can't figure out whose, just go away), sends out a search party. About this time a PREDATOR craft shows up looking to salvage the remains of the wrecked craft, etc., etc. hell, this shit writes itself. one good thing has come from this: at least i know my scripts aren't shitty enough to bother sending to fox.
April 24, 2006, 6:31 p.m. CST
Is it really fair to judge the first draft?? Do you know how badly Drew reacted when his "first draft" of PRO LIFE was reviewed at the John Carpenter site?? "It was an early version!!" He pooped his pants and made the site remove it. He also talks about how his scripts for POST HUMAN, PAVLOV'S DOGS and FINAL WAR were ealy drafts and defends them that way. Yet here he is killing some other guys sub-B Movie rip off garbage. Does it sound bad?? It sure does. And I have no faith that it will ever be made better, But the fact that all of you continue to allow McWeeny to spoonfeed you disingenuous pablum is disheartening. Watch for reviews of HIS first drafts and then watch the big fat baby pitch a fit. I hope Salerno beats him down like the Tarantino/Murphy fiasco. Maybe it'll knock some sense and some humlity into the careerist, manipulative self-appointed King Geek. That's exactly what Drew needs. An ass-kicking. That and his departure from this site. The decade long readers of this site--like myself-- deserve better than this pandering bullshit.
April 24, 2006, 6:33 p.m. CST
People went to see this flick in theatres, rented the DVDs and bought the extended cut based on the strength of the characters. I know this for a fact because I went to go see it based on this (and subsequently boycotted buying the DVD), and I know plenty of people who didn't bother going to a theatre who picked it up on DVD as a random purchase. At the most, 5% of people who saw it were enthusiastic about it, everyone else was making fun of it. If you made a fourth Die Hard movie and it was utter shite, you'd still get good numbers on it because the first three flicks are so well-regarded. Do everyone (yourselves included) a favor and ditch Anderson, get someone worthwhile to direct, get a good script that includes the following criteria: set in the future, contains BIG ACTION SEQUENCES (ie. MANY Aliens instead of three), marines, Predators that stick to the accepted look and a plotline that at least comes somewhere close to the accepted storylines that millions of people grew up on and love. At this rate, you'll end up with a negligable opening weekend and much lower DVD revenue based on the last time around. People got excited about AVP back in the day because the comic series was able to work in the same general universe as the films. People do NOT want to see little three-way battles, they want to see an all-out war going on. Whether this means LotR-scale battles or something a little smaller, it's all CGI anyway. Just work out the compromise and I'll guarantee you my theatre money as well as a DVD sale, alright?
April 24, 2006, 6:42 p.m. CST
by Mr Nice Gaius
...you didn't have anything to do with that script now did you?
April 24, 2006, 6:52 p.m. CST
Just commenting on what should be an obvious bit of bullshit. I'm sure Drew accuartely describes the shittiness of the story. I am sure he is dead-on. And I also agree with the kid. But it just smells like a steaming piss in the mouths of Talkbackers. "Here, guys, this is what you want!! But please ignore the fact that when it's done to me I cry like a bitch and call my lawyers." Mr. McWeeny has a double-standard that renders his critical opinions on this site completely useless. I'd prefer a Harry review of this script because at least I know Harry's lunacy comes from an honest place, and he's never written a script that ripped off the worst elements of INDEPENDENCE DAY. Or merrick. Merrick is the best thing to happen to this site in ages. That guy has a level head and he gets it. Let him read some of this stuff and give us a fresh perspective. This one is stale and corrupt.
April 24, 2006, 6:56 p.m. CST
jumped into the Talkbacks. Wholly shit that was one of the funnier TB episodes ever. I'll be watching this to see if Salerno pops in to defend himself. I doubt it. Unlike Moriarty, he's too busy getting screenplays made into actual movies. No time for AICN slumming with the rest of us plebs.
April 24, 2006, 6:59 p.m. CST
I don't think your logic holds water. By far the majority of the talkbacks have been reacting viscerally to the fact that this script TAKES PLACE IN MODERN DAY TEXAS. It wouldn't matter if it was the very best possible script based on that premise, and in his review, Moriarty even complimented the quality of some of the writing. The anger has nothing to do with something that can be polished off in future drafts. It has to do with the very premise of the movie. If you don't believe Moriarty has credibility because you don't like his scripts, that's fine. Personally, I think your credibility is suspect because you just said that you've been reading this site for ten years and yet you hate Moriarty, one of the main writers, and want him to leave. Clearly he's a big part of what the site is, so after ten years I think you can accept that or *you* can leave. Whatever your problem with him is, it is clearly clouding your judgment on this issue. First drafts have nothing to do with it. It's all about aliens in Texas circa 2006. In fact it doesn't even matter that it's Moriarty. If Quint or Harry or somebody we never heard of told us that they were bringing aliens to modern day Texas, the reaction would've been the same. Moriarty just happens to have put alot more explanation and context to this information.
April 24, 2006, 7:08 p.m. CST
I guess I'll *leave" then, toughguy. My premise is how can anyone take seriously the word or opinion of the writer of PAVLOV'S DOGS?? Did YOU read that?? Or his other scripts?? I bet you didn't. You are not in the business or have the connections that I do. That's not your fault. But trust me, friend, they suck as badly as this script. Not only that but is anyone really surprised it sucks?? We all saw the first one. The tone Drew takes in the intro to this breakdown is pandering and patronizing. If that's ok with you then fine. Not with me and not with a lot of other supporters of this site. Drew is no loner of value here. It's simple and easy venue for him to self-promote. If he were even remotely as successful as he thinks he is he wouldn't be slumming on this site. He'd be taking meetings with ben Kingsley. He knows not to quit his day job.
April 24, 2006, 7:10 p.m. CST
by Mr. Profit
That "Viva La Raza" shit is straight up Mexican. I beleve the Kings say "Amor Del Rey". Anyhow, gangs are fucking retarded. Let's get back to the AvsP hatred. I'm loving it.
April 24, 2006, 7:18 p.m. CST
Did they say "and keep it cheap" the writer? Because this sounds exactly like how a movie made for the Sci-Fi channel would do it. I mean we've gone from giant haunted house like space ships and super space commandoes to a bunch of hillbillie yokels that belong in cheap 80's horror movies? How does anyone making movies think that's okay? How does an audience say "that's okay, make more of this shit"? Maybe this is a joke script or something...or maybe the truly gutless fucks have taken control of FOX and this franchise and we need to just give up on big screen sci-fi cooldom for at least a whole generation of movie makers. One thing is clear, Cameron would have to fuck up mighty bad to make a movie that doesn't blow away the shit that's being made now.
April 24, 2006, 7:27 p.m. CST
Frankly, this sounds like a better story than the first one, which is more of a sad comment on the quality of the first AVP. and, not for nothing, I appreciate the fact that Moriarty and the AICN crew go to great lengths to deliver the news, but the OP/ED aspect of this site can be somewhat misleading. How many people actually think this idea for a movie sucks simply because of the language that it's couched in within this review. and while I have no doubt that Moriarty and Harry have acute film expertise from the fan's POV, I don't know exactly what qualifications they may have in rendering an astute read of a screenplay. Due respect to all of the AICN crew, but would these guys have the same read of the original script for ALIEN or PREDATOR that Ridley Scott or John McTiernan had? We'll never know, but in both cases the directors took "B-movie" and "popcorn" scripts and created films that we all worship decades after the fact. I don't think there's anything fundamentally wrong with Saturday night quarterbacking, but the negativity of this review seems so caustic as to border on personal. and yes, the first film sucked because of the writer-dierctor. But sisce the damage to franchises can't be undone, why not hope for the best; that a good director comes along, preferably one no one has heard of, and beats this film into the geek fantasy that we've all had about it since we first hear of the project, lo these many years ago.
April 24, 2006, 7:56 p.m. CST
April 24, 2006, 7:56 p.m. CST
The first two Alien movies were classics. Alien 3, despite it's many flaws (killing Newt and Hicks) wasn't that bad of a film. As the years went on, the film grew more and more on me - especially after seeing Ressurection. It atleast managed to capture the look and feel of an alien movie and had the balls to actually kill Ripley and not give us a happy-go-lucky ending. Predator was also another classic....as for Predator 2...eh. AVP was alright, felt really cheesy and I think the first mistake was setting it during the present day on Earth. If they wanted to make a smart movie, they should have set it on some distant outpost world and perhaps add some colonial marines into the mix. It could have been a truly badass film. In either case, this movie really sounds like a fucking joke and I hope it doesn't kill our chances for another Alien film. If they ever do one again, they should try exploring the origins of the Alien a little more and elaborate more on what the Company was trying to accomplish with them and whether or not the creatures are actually bio-weapons. Also, maybe even introduce the species from the crashed ship in the first film- although keep their role to a minimmun, it'd be important to keep them shrouded in mystery.
April 24, 2006, 8:10 p.m. CST
April 24, 2006, 8:14 p.m. CST
Those are the ingredients that would make an AvP movie actually worth giving a shit about. Fuck, how much would you pay to see that movie?? I wouldn't care if it was the biggest piece of shit ever. Just seeing Arnold in front of the camera shooting the shit out of Aliens and Predators would be enough! And with Cameron at the helm, excuse me while I go change my pants. Of course, that would never happen. I know now why you cry, but it's something I can never do. Oh yeah? If this shit script is made I promise you we WILL be seeing Terminators cry. Hell, a fucking toaster would cry. I'm out. Just FUUUUUUUUCK FOX!!!!
April 24, 2006, 8:17 p.m. CST
Seriously. I've just gotta know.
April 24, 2006, 8:20 p.m. CST
Didn't think so.
April 24, 2006, 9:26 p.m. CST
While reading it I was astounded at the erudite quality of his writing, not to mention that his vocabulary goes well beyond the average here. (Sorry guys but it's true, many of you can't write for shit.) Not to hate on a guy for being well educated (I wouldn't tdo that I'm not George W. Bush) but clearly this PLANT hasn't studied the writing of people who live in these talkbacks. BigSugar, you need more Hulk Hogan or Chuck Norris and other pop-cultural AICNTB specific references. Perhaps this 'sic' example might help: Salerno cheets on AVP2 and has a beer with Chuck Norris's BROTHER!" Or something like that. Better luck next time. But the people here aren't being swayed by Moriarty's vitriol towards this project, we have our own, we can clearly see that this thing is not the film we wish it to be. Check my idea labeled "Right off the top of my head" from a few pages up we KNOW how this shit is supposed to go down and we're not so naive as to see why various gross commercial interests are perverting whay should be a pretty fucking simple tale to tell. Hell I don't care if all my Astronauts and Marines had real world sponsorship logos on their uniforms, make them the Pepsi Colonial Marines for all I care if you need the product placement THAT badly I understand the economics of these things which is why I swear to you I could make a much cooler film than this in Sydney for around $12Million not only that but no-one would be hung or stoned to death in the process.
April 24, 2006, 9:26 p.m. CST
by Doom II
There are 2 ways to make it in Hollywood. #1 Be a relative or friend of someone already established or #2 Fuck/suck your way to the top. The one way to NEVER be successful in Hollywood: Show up with a head full of great ideas and a ton of talent.....Burn Hollywood Burn!
April 24, 2006, 9:57 p.m. CST
S-Mart would be the only place that would carry such crap as this. Hell, the coin-op video games had better plots that this! To answer a previous question, yes, there was a series of Dark Horse Comics regarding Hicks and Newt several years after Aliens, the storyline dealth with with/up to Aliens on Earth, and Ripley coming back to help wipe them out (the Predator had a brief apperance on Earth). The plot line was going well until Alien3 was released. Shortly thereafter, another graphic novel called Aliens - Newt's story was released with a disclaimer at the end that everything that transpired in the previous comics was just a nightmare she was having before the aliens caused the EEV to crash.
April 24, 2006, 10:57 p.m. CST
All of us are screaming to the powers that be that this script sucks balls and that the franchise is in the shitter and that the writers are pathetic. But I guarantee you that many of us will still go to this movie, if only to 'confirm that it does indeed suck' well guess what...They win..and also earn money to make another fucking travesty of the series. It would be nice if people actually DID NOT go see the movies they claim sucks. I'll admit, its hard cuz even though you know a given movie will suck, many of us are still curious about it and go see it anyway. It would be awesome if people really didn't go see this AT ALL so that it truly does tank and they either go back to the drawing board and come up with a gem like Batman Begins..or they abandon the franchise altogether.
April 24, 2006, 11:02 p.m. CST
Picking on the Alien vs Predator 2 script is like making fun of the retarded kid down the street. Sure it's fun, but it's just too fucking easy. Why should anyone assigned to write Alien Vs Predator 2 "try harder"? This is exactly the movie that anyone who pays to see Alien vs Fucking Predator part Fucking Two deserves to see.
April 24, 2006, 11:37 p.m. CST
Oh sorry Jason, I didn't know that you were In the Industry and Had Connections. I take it back. Nah... just teasing you. I just don't understand why you have such a problem with Moriarty's credibility NOW, after you say you've been reading the site for more than ten years. If that's the case then it seems like you would have made peace with the fact that you don't accept the opinions of one of the main writers and you would be able to at least stop reading his reviews. I actually didn't think the review was all that caustic, he went out of his way to be polite to a writer who took a job that no writer with integrity would have taken. You're the one who demanded that he leave the site and called me "tough guy" for defending him. I wasn't looking for some heated exchange, I just disagree with you.
April 24, 2006, 11:39 p.m. CST
It was hard to care enough to read that so I am amazed Mori cared enough to write it. Who cares about this franchise? I guess I do in the same way I would care if my ex-girlfriend were a crack ho.
April 24, 2006, 11:43 p.m. CST
April 24, 2006, 11:47 p.m. CST
I put his name in google and he has written other talkbacks over the years. Some of them were defending the remake of Texas Chainsaw Massacre, but oh well. I think he is legitimately not a plant which I think makes him the first person on this thread to say that it "doesn't sound as bad" as the first one, which is the closest so far to saying it sounds good.
April 24, 2006, 11:50 p.m. CST
by 'Cholera's Ghost
"Caustic"??? "Astute"??? "Acute"??? I am disinclined to acquiese to your request, BigSugar. It seems despite mine and others clear warnings that you went ahead and pushed that button, which shows you have some balls of steel underneath all that foliage to try and fool a TB full of Dirty Harry's waitin' for that special someone to make our day. Just be prepared to reap the whirlwind. So you "don't know exactly what qualifications [Harry & Moriarty] may have in rendering an astute read of a screenplay?" What qualifications do we need to look for before we can judge with a fair amount of accuracy that it SUCKS ASS taking two of scifi horror's greatest icons and having them duke it out in a fuckin' KMART?!? K-MART!!! And even the most objective take of this script sans Moriarty's "causticity" does not place it anywhere within a thousand light years of Predator 1 or Die Hard 1 territory, my friend. I don't care if you put this one in the hands of a Cameron/Scott double team. Go, and tell your Masters, what you have learned here...
April 24, 2006, 11:57 p.m. CST
If Chucky was impregnated by an Alien I wonder what the fuck that thing would look like? Glad to see Hollywood has some fresh ideas.
April 25, 2006, 12:06 a.m. CST
by Orbots Commander
Think Starship Troopers. Only the main characters are human slave cannon fodder, prisoners of the Predators who are meant to be the first line to be thrust into battle in an invasion of the ALIEN planet. The main character focus can be on a Spartacus/Gladiator type human who just fights in order to survive the Predator-Alien war.
April 25, 2006, 1:54 a.m. CST
So I guess he's a plant-for-hire. "Have no taste, shame or soul. Will travel". As for Jason P Thompson, I don't recall ever seeing him in any discussion about anything on AICN before. Hey Jason, are you the same Jason P Thompson on the CHUD boards who once stated "I'm not getting excited based on any reviews, as I know to never read anything on AICN without doubts in my mind." Sounds to me like it's not a Mori problem but a general AICN problem you have. With an attitude like that, it wouldn't really have mattered WHAT was said about AvP2 on AICN, nicht war? Or is this all just an elaborate way of getting us to ask you about YOUR filmmaking efforts so that you have an excuse to show us all your scripts?
April 25, 2006, 2:46 a.m. CST
"AvP ,Its easy as 1,2,3.Oh fox baby cant you see, your killin this franchise for you and me."
April 25, 2006, 2:50 a.m. CST
Why not keep the insane idea of the PredAlien, include the predators in stasis....maybe two with aliens inside. Let the ship drift around the cosmos for a couple of centuries (the protagonists are in stasis)and let the ship crash land on the planet Ryushii, and then do the original comic book AvP story, which sort of keeps the small texan town feel!! It's hardly rocket science!
April 25, 2006, 4:05 a.m. CST
April 25, 2006, 5:44 a.m. CST
Why has hardly anyone mentioned making a Predator 3? WE NEED PREDATOR 3! DIRECTED BY SODERBERGH!
April 25, 2006, 6:28 a.m. CST
Or some other shopping mall? And we all know how that turned out ...
April 25, 2006, 7:12 a.m. CST
April 25, 2006, 8:43 a.m. CST
http://www.seedfilm.com/ Pics look good. Might contact them.
April 25, 2006, 8:49 a.m. CST
If you talk to fans of the franchise[s] and ask them, "What do you NOT want to see in a film?" they would probably say, "Well, I don't want them to set it in some cheapo location to avoid putting it in space. And I don't want to see, like, two Predators fight three aliens." The studio is setting out to deliver the movie their fans explicitly would warn them they don't want. It's predictable that they're doing so, for budgetary reasons, but it's also predictable that people will bitch about the script without waiting to see the finished product or "giving it a chance". If to save money Peter Jackson had decided to reimagine the Lord of the Rings as "Stand By Me 2" where little kids walk from one side of Burbank to another, people would not have waited to see the finished product, either, because that would have been so completely what people did not want, and what they knew they did not want.
April 25, 2006, 8:50 a.m. CST
Nope, but it looks cool. Thanks for the heads up. Sight unseen, I'll bet it's a hell of a lot more respectful of the source material than the shit we'll be getting.
April 25, 2006, 9:22 a.m. CST
I'm sorry for being so coarse but anyone who is intelligent enough to write your comments is also intelligent enough to know that this script/idea sucks balls (even if you wrote it). Only 99.99% of people in the forum think so, but hey, what do we know?
April 25, 2006, 10:04 a.m. CST
by Childe Roland
...I don't know that we want to get into the habit of calling anyone who simply doesn't know his shit a plant. Thats how folks get burned at the stake. I will say, though, Sugar, that you need to look into Mori's background a bit before insinuating that he doesn't know what goes into a good (or bad) screenplay. He writes screenplays, which would incline your typical writer in a "who-do-you-know" environment like Hollywood to tread lightly and give generously when evaluating a peer's and prospective collaborator's creative efforts. He's also written some bad stuff himself and, as the old adage goes, it takes one to know one. Harry, on the other hand, is a producer. So you can feel free to assume he wouldn't know a good script from a bad one from a piece of toilet paper he's found pinched between one of the many folds in his ass. But take Mori's word for it when it comes to writing. He knoweth of what he speaketh...even if he don't alwath useth that knowledge resthponsthiblieth.
April 25, 2006, 10:26 a.m. CST
I actually do not believe that BigSugar IS really a "PLANT!" but that doesn't lessen my, or anyone else's, right to baselessly declare that he is a bougainvillea. I did some checking and it seems Mr Sugar has a preexisting love of Donnie Darko TBs and other prior dealings on AICN, (none of which precludes the possibility that he may actually be a "Plant-For-Hire" as Doc hilariously posited), but he just picked the WRONG story idea to defend here that's all. If he's not a Plant then he's a Chump.
April 25, 2006, 10:36 a.m. CST
by Mr Nice Gaius
...just may have peaked their heads into this TB at the wrong time. However, after Doc Paz's warning about "strange new talkbackers", their collective timing was impeccable. I'll surprised and mildly amused if they return. Besides, with a name like "BigSugar", you're just asking for TB trouble.
April 25, 2006, 10:56 a.m. CST
by Kid Joker
... that we all originally thought was the one they'd make and then they fire the guy all together and get Dan O' Bannon and Ronald Shusset with John and James Thomas to rewrite the whole thing from scratch. PS: I so thought that the Predator ship crashing at the start of this one would become the one they found in the first Alien, that would probably be terrible continuity but a good idea I guess.... at least better than this fucking film.
April 25, 2006, 11:11 a.m. CST
Mr. Roland, I write screenplays myself, all of them bad, and I can tell you with no ammount of uncertainty that screenplays by their very nature are difficult to read. Ever so rare is the script that comes along like PULP FICTION that leaps off of the page. Therefore the best individual read of a script, in my opinion, is from a director. Someone whose vision for the film is formed throughout the process of reading it (the script). I'll repeat; I mean no disrespect to Moriarty, Harry, et. al. I simply choose to question the review of the script. I think Moriarty of all people, given that he is a screenwriter, has a learned opinion of the script. That said, I also think that even he would say that a script is by no means a completed film. You need look no further than ALIEN to find a script that was nowhere near the finished product. I'm also frustrated by the aspects of the script mentioned in the review that are taking the franchises into the ninth circle of hell, but I also think there could very well be room for a director to come in here and make a film that we could get behind. Be that as it may, if I offended anyone, I apologize. As for the idea that I am a "plant," (whatever the hell that is) I find it simply ridiculous. I live in a far more remote area of the country than any of you could imagine. so there's no need to accuse me of poisoning the well.
April 25, 2006, 11:14 a.m. CST
and a person who is insulted by the fact that the man who co-wrote a script about "the President of Africa" saving the world from a an alien invasion that makes ID4 look like 2001...that that writer wants me or anybody else to trust his opinion on anything. Bryan, as far as Salerno taking a gig below dignity, you do realize Drew wrote MORTAL KOMBAT 3, right?? MK3?? AVP2?? I'd wager AVP2 is slightly more respectable. But whatever. You guys are apparently OK with being talked down to. I agree this script sounds like utter shit and should be burned. I'm not a Plant, you paranoid dicks. I'm just not a follower like the rest of you. You can find me at CHUD if you want to discuss this furthur. Otherwise, I'm finished with this.
April 25, 2006, 11:29 a.m. CST
Let me clarify: a writer with integrity wouldn't take a job where they have to put the aliens from Alien into modern day Texas. I don't begrudge anyone for taking a job doing Alien vs. Predator 2, Mortal Kombat 3 or Dr. Dolittle vs. Basic Instinct. I have sympathy for either the "well, I need the money" or the naive "maybe I could turn it into something better" approaches. But when it's a situation where you have to take something like Alien and do something like put it in 2006 Texas (or he has to take care of a streetwise kid, or become a cop or teach art history to inner city kids), that's when you have to summon up your dignity and say, "Sorry guys, I can't do this." That's all I'm saying.
April 25, 2006, 11:55 a.m. CST
You clearly stated on CHUD that you are suspicious of anything you read on AICN. Don't try to turn this into a Mori thing. Also, are you truly so stupid that you think Mori doesn't realize that Africa consists of a large number of different countries? I haven't read that particular script, but I'm betting that if there is a "President of Africa" in it, that the story takes place in some future scenario where the continent -- as implausible as it may be -- has united as one nation. Why not bitch about spaceships roaring audibly through space while you're at it?
April 25, 2006, 11:56 a.m. CST
The importance of this article is the details about the script that it reveals. Period. Are the details of the script revealed here inaccurate? You seem to think that this is about Drew McSweeney, and it's not. It doesn't matter if Drew wrote the article, or the fucking apostle Paul. You seem to think that we shouldn't take Drew's opinion, because he too has written what you consider to be bad scripts. But no one here is considering Drew's opinion. They're considering the fact that they don't want an AVP movie SET IN TEXAS. It doesn't matter if the screenwriter is talented or not. The story choices are pissing people off right off the bat. He could write the fucking thing in iambic pentameter and it wouldn't make any difference.
April 25, 2006, 12:03 p.m. CST
...but the script comparisons you draw don't hold water. By all accounts, the ALIEN script probably looked like cold poop on paper. However, it didn't build on a well-established mythos where there is instant familiarity with visual design, atmosphere and the rules of that particular universe. The AVP2 script, on the other hand, can in its present form never be anything but a risible and offensive piece of shit because it rapes virtually every positive and established facet of the existing universe. Neither Cameron, Scott or fucking Antonioni could save this bag of swill. I'll say it again: Aliens and Predators. In K-mart. How the flying fuck do you make that presentable and worthy of respect?
April 25, 2006, 12:19 p.m. CST
by Mr Nice Gaius
The "AvPII" script concept or that JasonPThompson expects us to follow his ass to CHUD to "discuss this further". Dude, why even bother posting here?
April 25, 2006, 12:32 p.m. CST
by 'Cholera's Ghost
IF, in fact, you are not an apprentice to Darth Fox. It's just that your post made me want to sprinkle croutons all over it.
April 25, 2006, 12:53 p.m. CST
THIS IS SIMPLY THE BESTEST EVER SCRIPT TO MADE INTO A MOVIE EVER WRITTEN!!!! ARE YOU MOTHERFUCKERS HIGH????? THIS IS GENIUS!!!! AND I MEAN BETTER THAN THAT CITIZEN KANE SHIT!!! AFTER ALL THESE FUCKING BAD MOVIES ABOUT ALL THESE INEPT
April 25, 2006, 12:55 p.m. CST
and very poorly timed. He's done good work and he is doing good work now. You will see.
April 25, 2006, 1:06 p.m. CST
Most people here are attacking Fox as a whole. Salerno, who obviously agreed to do the job, is a cash whore. Nothing wrong with that when you're a struggling writer, but taking heat for writing a script laced throughout with ideas which seem to concretize the very antithesis of the canon is part of the package. I know Salerno is your bud and all, but you're not doing him any favors by railing against Mori.
April 25, 2006, 1:15 p.m. CST
...maybe WE'RE doing Salerno a favor. If there's any truth to the idea that he only wrote what he had been told to write, perhaps the universal revulsion his script has provoked will cause Fox to rethink and give Salerno a free pass to write that ultimate AvP movie of his which has been denied the world at large.
April 25, 2006, 1:27 p.m. CST
I think a comparison to the ALIEN script is apropo in that, though you are correct in terms of both the visual design and the mythology, both of those aspects are only a portion of the film, not the film in its entirety. This is of course only if we choose to concentrate on the ALIEN films. The design of both PREDATOR films was (God forgive me) pedestrian at best compared to the ALIEN series. It seems to me that Anderson attempted to soften the design of both creatures for the first AVP. Therefore reading the script in the context of the ALIEN films is akin to judging a mule at the Kentucky Derby. Of course it won't hol up to much scrutiny, but then what film could. It's worth remembering, by the by, that the second half of the ALIEN quadrilogy is regarded with much disdain by purists (I am not among those ranks). This is to say nothing of the fact that the second half of the PREDATOR franchise is widely thought of a a misfire as well. It seems to me that this situation sets up a scenario in which the possibity of broadening both the design and mythology aspects of the combined franchises should be welocmed rather than ridiculed. Again, I point to the first AVP. Being that the film was so far beneath the expectations of the core audience, doesn't that actually open the dor for anything, rather than closing it off? Be that as it may, if I were hunting humans, I'd go to the closest center of commerce. Wal-Mart or K-Mart would be the operfct place to collect spinal columns and skulls.
April 25, 2006, 1:32 p.m. CST
Somone had to put this debacle into perspective...
April 25, 2006, 1:42 p.m. CST
I tried to get through the episode Mori co-wrote on that Masters of Horror show on Showtime on Demand -- I couldn't get through it. I haven't read anything he's written so my only exposure was a boring (to me) anthology episode that I didn't connect with. My reactions here had nothing to do with the author of the article and everything to do with the concept of this sequel. Unless Mori is lying about this draft (which I don't think he is) then his writing about it had nothing to do with any of our talkbacks. The fact is this idea for this movie sounds putrid. If Fox hears about our vehement reaction here and slows down the production on this thing and rethinks, then it was all good. And I for one am not knocking Salerno -- unless this was the take he came into Fox with. If Fox told Salerno we want only a handful of Aliens and Predators and set it in small town Texas with a bunch of stock American characters, then he's not responsible. He did what he was told to do. The amount of money a writer can make on an assignment like this is ridiculous and can take care of him and his family--something I think all of you can understand. But if Salerno has been dreaming of setting this movie in rural Texas and a Kmart and it was his idea that he walked into Fox with, then he deserves all of the bashing and then some. Either way, what compelled me to post was the concept of this awful potential sequel that is related to a series (Alien) that I love and wish someone would come rescue. Listen, Predator was a good popcorn movie but it was never on a par (in my mind) with Alien or Aliens which were examples of near perfection. I'm not a fan of any of the sequels after Aliens because quite frankly they are not even in the same realm as the first 2. Alien 3 almost feels like a standalone movie to me that was just a nightmare and Resurrection feels like a B movie version of a Alien film. Because some comic book writers decided to cross the universes of aliens and predators and people freaked about the comics and bought them, this is what we're stuck with. But Fox knows they can do better than what is currently in the draft we're reacting to. And by evidence of our reaction, they just might do better. Just don't buy this shit if they make it as is with Anderson at the helm. It's up to us to stop this crap. If we don't buy it, they won't make it and then they will be forced to re-examine where it went wrong and this talkback might be one of the things that helps them find their ways. If we collectively demand better from the studios -- we will get it. And trust me there are those of us who are already looking to change things from within. Copolla had the vision many years ago but didn't execute on it. As long as the movie going public doesn't support slapped together ad campaigned cheap uninspired flicks, it will change. But it starts with us. Stop giving them your money unless it's a movie you really want/need to see.
April 25, 2006, 1:46 p.m. CST
I could tell that you were probably a writer of some sort from your post. I know that it is a very tough job and that it is also very tough for people to criticise projects into which you have put a lot of heart. However, no matter how proud or close you are to a project, if the basic premise is flawed it will never fly. No matter how good the writing involved. For example AvP2 written as Critters meets Gremlins.
April 25, 2006, 3:08 p.m. CST
How can you watch something like HISTORY OF VIOLENCE and declare that as brilliant, and then criticise another picture for using dialog like, "If any monsters try to get us tonight, I
April 25, 2006, 3:42 p.m. CST
That aspect of this site has always been overrated. Keep dreaming. I'm sure people in the industry read it but if you think any decsions are made based on a small contigent of individuals nestled away in a slightly larger contigent, you're giving the ginger fat guy far too much credit. The fans of this site comrpise a mer molecule of the wholemoviegoing public. Joe Schmo in the trailer-park--the real target for this movie--doesn't know AICN from Wal Mart. The way you guys kid yourself about that is charming. Beyond that, as somebody elsestated in this TB this movie looks designed to be done for not a lot of money. They can use existing sets and costumes. It'll get teens and more non-discerning geeks into the theater, as well as the white trash idiots who made the original a success. It'll sell well overseas because this stuff always does. And it'll make money on DVD. If they keep the budget below or around $50 million this thing is a fucking monkeymaker. Of course, that's the problem with it. It's product. It's not a movie. They don't care what the web-geek sub-culture thinks because if they cared about you and us the first fucking movie wouldn't have been such a clusterfuck. They will say it's for us, guys, but it's not. That's probably the biggest crime of all.
April 25, 2006, 4:34 p.m. CST
You reviewed a first draft and posted passages from it. And you expected to get away with it. Sounds awfully familiar.....That's rich. In a way I have to say I fucking love you. So may hours of amusment. Rock on.
April 25, 2006, 4:34 p.m. CST
I hope that all the hell raising has had an effect, but it occurs to me that there is a bigger problem, namely this; this whole conversation has revoloved around a project that for all intents and purposes is something that we shouldn't care about in the first place. None of us should give one good goddamn about where this franchise goes now. We have spent the last two years inundated with terrible excuses for films. sequels, T.V. adaptations, and more sequels that make the multiplex look more live the T.V. guide in 1980 have taken over. and in this discussion, we've been talking about preserving the integrity of two much beloved film monsters when perhaps what we should all bedoing is looking for the next monster. where is the next ALIEN or PREDATOR? For all of the people who think that this idea is such a bad one, what's your idea? And I'm not saying this sarcastically, or calling anyone out. I mean it. I hope to God that Moriarty or Harry or anybody on this talkback comes up with the movie that ten years from now we call all fawn over. some of you cats with good ideas (no, not the Boggy Creek thing or the Napoleon Dynamite bit) need to get you asses to work. I don'r know about any of you, but I've been hurting for something to jump off of the screen and throttle me for the past four years. Maybe somebody here is holding on to the idea that will do it for us. You can laugh at that and be as cynical as you want, but geeks, real geeks are the ones who change everything. for better or worse.
April 25, 2006, 4:38 p.m. CST
circa Land of the dead. Alien/Zombie hybrid.Brain eating ensues...
April 25, 2006, 4:38 p.m. CST
by drew mcweeny
... as always, you choose not to understand. There is a difference between printing (and I counted) less than 100 words total from a script and printing the entire script. But you don't want to understand the difference, so you won't.
April 25, 2006, 5:05 p.m. CST
by Hairy Nutsack
Seriously, why'd you pull the review at all? Since you didn't post the script this falls squarely in the realm of Freedom of the Press does it not?
April 25, 2006, 5:24 p.m. CST
Guess we better read your X3 reviews early that day.
April 25, 2006, 5:27 p.m. CST
I don't recall Fox getting their panties in a bunch when the first AvP script info leaked -- probably because there was more of a divided opinion concerning its merits/flaws. Make no mistake -- this thing was on the production fast track until yesterday. Well done, geeks.
April 25, 2006, 5:34 p.m. CST
by 'Cholera's Ghost
I share some of your sentiments but you are either the most optimistic talkbacker ever or the most wily plant I have ever seen. Sure, it's good to look on the bright side of life, but you're whistling while they crucify Alien and Predator, man! Just do it. Say it with me: "This ... script ... sucks ... ass." Just say it. Just admit it. Join the good guys.
April 25, 2006, 5:38 p.m. CST
by Mr Nice Gaius
I can't help but come away with the impression that they (FOX) were a little hot under the collar. Issuing a "C&D" request makes me wonder if the production wheels had already started to spin based on the announced release date. But when something is so blatantly horrendous, you've got to call it like you see it.
April 25, 2006, 5:42 p.m. CST
by 'Cholera's Ghost
"...here's hoping you're hard at work making the entire review a moot point right now." Indeed.
April 25, 2006, 5:46 p.m. CST
by Amazing Inframan
Pulling the article after 48 hours is about 47 hours & 30 seconds too long to contain the spread of information across the Internet. The TRUTH is already out there, deleting its source this late in the game is like cutting out only part of tumor that has already spread throughout a body. Also, if the project were going to be adjusted or re-worked in some way, it would have been much more clever - and much funnier - to let everyone proceed on the assumption that the script Drew reviewed was actually the script they were going to make...then whop us all over the heads by making a completely different version of the film. *We* would have all looked kind of silly if they'd done that.
April 25, 2006, 6:24 p.m. CST
Isn't it obvious that they're going for some kind of half-assed, low-budget political statement? I would bet it involves some kind of Guest Worker program.
April 25, 2006, 6:32 p.m. CST
I can see the Aliens representing "Liberals," eating/killing whatever they see fit, wanting free government handouts, pushing their liberal/alien agenda (literally) in the faces of gullible Texans (via face-huggers)... then the big, bad Republicans (Predators) come in to save the day. It is from FOX, after all.
April 25, 2006, 7:35 p.m. CST
we can all be assured that these morons got the hint that this piece of universally rviled shit will not make it to the screen. Come on Fox, we want an AVP film on some level but we need you to wake up to the smell of the shit you're shovelling at us. We demand and deserve better than what this script represented, especially when any number of us could do a better job than this hack.
April 25, 2006, 8:15 p.m. CST
Thanks for the Script Review by RezE11even April 24th, 2006 03:31:58 PM CST I can only hope the massive negative attention it gets is enough to halt production and take it in an entirely different direction, ala Jurassic Park 4.
April 25, 2006, 10 p.m. CST
If your review is in any way responsible for the demise of that atrocious idea for a movie then I owe you a thousand thanks. If it really was just a first draft that bears no resemblance to whatever sequel they come up with then I still thank you and everyone else at AICN for giving us the opportunity to let our voices be heard. These characters are too important to us and have too much of a rich history to be pissed all over this way and if this shook up the suits, even a little, then this place has done us all a favor.
April 25, 2006, 10:36 p.m. CST
I've always dreamed of AVW: ALIEN VS. WOOKIE
April 25, 2006, 11:52 p.m. CST
or did i missread that statment?
April 25, 2006, 11:59 p.m. CST
keep in mind that this is irrelevant to the disscussion at hand. his ability or inability to write has nothing to do with his ability to REVEIW what others have written. they are completely different areas of expertise and thought. furthermore, anything he has had produced serves only to give him credibility as a 'real' writer. but at the same moment, it ironically takes away any sense of objectivity and thus makes him less credible.
April 26, 2006, 12:50 a.m. CST
...but we've made our voices heard and that is more important than anything. Listen, Fox might go full speed ahead with Alien vs Predator set in Texas and take the chance we're all just posturing. Perhaps they'll think the sampling of reactions in here won't be enough to make a difference and they could care less if we support the project with our dollars. If they do go ahead with it, it'll go down as one of the biggest bombs and will cost jobs. You know why? Because they were warned. The fact that Mori reviewed what he read and we all came out swinging will not be lost. The buzz on this site has taken down bigger movies than Alien Vs. Predator II. If Fox wants to roll the dice and still make Salerno's poorly conceived draft, then they will suffer the consequences. End of story. If they use this episode as a reason to dig deep and try to get things right and restore some respect to the Alien franchise, then we've collectively done something great here and we have Mori to thank for exposing the weak ass script for what it was. I don't care if it was a first, second or twentieth draft he reviewed. If they paid Salerno to write Alien Vs. Predator in present day Texas there is no amount of rewrites that will make that concept palatable to fans of the franchises. Let's not pat each other on the back just yet, but find some solace that our disdain (and Mori's disdain) was heard.
April 26, 2006, 1:05 a.m. CST
So, Chud had a lively discussion on its message boards about this. (They're also producing a movie with Shane Salerno). Tonight, CHUD, the most merciless guys on the web when it comes to this shit, REMOVED their thread. If FOx told AICN to remove the review, and AICN left the talkback, why would CHUD have to wipe its message board?
April 26, 2006, 2:43 a.m. CST
The more I hear about this, the more it seems like Fox went into a panic of sorts and launched a massive campaign of damage control. What remains of the CHUD thread is very interesting reading. Nick's obviously agitated and hugely defensive about his actions. He claims that CHUD's message board had been printed out along with that of other web sites (heh) and read at the studio and that he's being "hit from a few directions". I like CHUD a lot and don't condone the removal of an entire discussion thread like that, but in this case I'm first and foremost a movie fan and view the belligerence on Fox's part as a sign that the criticism has had a positive effect on the project. The next script may turn out to be worse than this one, but if it ends up being a drastic improvement then it's a good bet we'll know what the impetus was.
April 26, 2006, 5:24 a.m. CST
April 26, 2006, 6:10 a.m. CST
If this had happened with the first AVP we might actually ended up with a kick arse film. get it? No I understand, you don't want bad buzz. Again, read the top of this post.
April 26, 2006, 8:19 a.m. CST
I understand that you are as lacking in ethics and morals as anybody on the web. We'll see what happens in the very near future. Consider that a "heads up," pal. Also, in regards to the CHUD thing, a lot of this with Nick has to do with the fact that Nick is straining to get his Salerno draft of MEG into production. Out of nowhere Drew guts Salerno--which he was right to do because the AVP3 thing is garbage. As much as Drew is a douche every now and then he's right about something. This is one of those times. So essentially you have 2 giant web-douches with non-starting movie careers, with but one hour long tv episode produced between them, going at each other over their territory. Compelling stuff. Drew, if you get a copy of the MEG script and review it's awfulness I will disband the remaining scorched planet dregs and never bother you again. In fact, I'll be a convert. Not only would that be awesome and funny, it would be fair. Just throwing that out there. You know how easy it is to get Nick sweating.
April 26, 2006, 8:32 a.m. CST
It really would worth the hassle of delaying the project by 12 months. A cool film would give you more money in the long run that a rubbish one now. Alien and Aliens are still shifting discs 20 years after they came out. Will AvP be doing the same...?
April 26, 2006, 10:48 a.m. CST
by Mr Nice Gaius
The image of these FOX studio heads sitting around a table with printed versions of AICN & CHUD TB conversations regarding this movie...well, I imagine a collective cartoon bubble over their heads saying, "WTF???".
April 26, 2006, 11:27 a.m. CST
I would have given almost anything to be a fly on the wall during that meeting. I mean, do they read it all and take notes for a round table discussion? I can see the suits sitting around going: "Well, Bob, you see in post 512 where the guy says "Fox, you cumguzzling assmonkeys, you suck" or "you cocksucking demons from satan's asshole"? Well, I'm thinking maybe we need to do a new reimagining concerning this whole AvP thing." ...... Or is it like in the old movies where lackeys come running in to an office trailing long TB printouts rather than stock info, sweat pouring down their faces, while the cigar-chomping boss says: "Well, Philbrick? Whaddaya got?" ...... "It's the talkbackers, sir."
April 26, 2006, 11:41 a.m. CST
...Let it be known I couldn't be bothered to see AVP 1 because it sounded so bad... And also that I kinda liked Alien: Resurrection for what it was. Seriously it wasn't some epic campaign in a mighty galactic war but it was a neat mid-sized film and I can live with that personally. Also, I have read some of the comics and so on. .......... . . . But what AVP should be, is a space movie. Got it? Not a monsters on earth movie. It's a space franchise. Yes I know the steel corridors of the past films are boring but there is more to "space" than that, potentially. Much more. .................... . . . . I wouldn't council making this a huge space war movie, actually. I would set it on an wild ruined planet. A world completely overrun by, wrecked by, the Aliens. Rubble, bombed-out towers and so on. Turns out The Corporation secretly sicced its weaponized Aliens on this hapless, alien civilization (yet another class of creatures) in order to get access to the planet's resources. And The Corporation, not a solely human coporation, has the Predators there doing their tourism thing wiping out the surviving Aliens. But... Surprise! New wrinkle on the Aliens. They not only produce queens but, when they have the time and scale to do it, they produce an Empress. The Empress is a highly intelligent creature who can direct the adult Aliens in a militaristic fashion. The Predators (and their human allies) wind up the guerillas on this planet besieged by Aliens whose vulnerability is their ant-like organization; something close to a role reversal. ....................... . . . . Or something................... . . . . Point being, Fox shouldn't confuse a demand for not screwing up the franchise for a demand not to add to the franchise. I think we want the next chapter, ne revelations. Just not retreads that destroy the fabric of what was there originally.
April 26, 2006, 12:11 p.m. CST
by 'Cholera's Ghost
consider my ass laughed off.
April 26, 2006, 1 p.m. CST
by Mr Nice Gaius
"Well, Philbrick? Whaddya got?" Nice! Now, that's comedy. -- Yeah, I can see it in my mind: a roundtable meeting called "The Impact Of AICN/CHUD Talkbacks On Scheduled 2007 Summer Releases - Subject: AvPII". Bullet points were set and Action Items were highlighted for follow-up discussion: "Johnson...just look at what these Talkback geeks are saying about our AvPII script. Call Marketing and have them make some inquiries. If this script really "sucks farts from the asses of dead antilopes in every conceivable way" like this DocPazuzu character says it does, I wanna know about it! And somebody get me Reynolds on the line!!!"
April 26, 2006, 2:04 p.m. CST
The cryptic references to "legal issues," the unconvincing vague references to the script Moriarty read being "bogus or partially bogus" (what, every other page was real?), etc. I know AICN isn't innocent of murky conflicts of interest themselves, but reading those posts definitely knocked Chud down about 15 notches in my eyes. Come on, there no legitimate "legal issues" here. No studio has any legal standing to stop a bunch of us movie nerds from complaining about their movie on a message board. At best, Fox threatened a completely bogus lawsuit that would get laughed out of the courts, but would bankrupt the web sites if they couldn't find a pro bono lawyer to defend them. But if that was the case the stand up thing to do would be to come right out and explain that that's the situation. Maybe post the cease and desist letter without comment. I think more likely they're worried about losing access to press junkets or hassles with their own movie productions. Which is where the conflicts start getting uncomfortable, I think. I guess I can't entirely blame them but I think the way you handle problems like this says a lot about your integrity. And to cower like punks and imply top secret information about wrongdoing on Moriarty's part is pretty lame. Oh well, not to turn this into some complaining about Chud thing, but I've never posted on there before so I thought I'd be out of place to whine about it over there. Anyway, good to see that Fox is worried about this, because they ought to be. Either make a genuine attempt at a good movie or don't make the sequel.
April 26, 2006, 2:08 p.m. CST
by 'Cholera's Ghost
"I want a 6-foot trench dug around the entire studio. Fill it with gasoline." Yes, sir. "Get the women and children out of here." On it. "Contact the Japanese affiliates." As we speak. "get me a complete file on each and every one of these bastards. I want to know where they live, what they eat, who they talk to, what they worry about, I want to know their deepest fears, their darkest secrets...I want to know what color of shit comes out of them in the morning...[putting on my best McCrosky voice] And Somebody Get Me The Sarge!" Alright, you heard the man,--let's move it, people! [claps hands motivationally as people start talking in confused, rapidfire tones, papers get loudly shuffled, briefcases snap, chairs screech across the floor, employees scatter chaotically in all directions, talking and dialing on cell phones]
April 26, 2006, 2:09 p.m. CST
Was when I last inserted its cartridge into my Atari Jaguar video game system. That's the last time the property truly rocked, with or without Mr. Frank Black.
April 26, 2006, 2:10 p.m. CST
Ryan Reynolds for young James T. Kirk in the fake *Star Trek 11*. I thought about that the other day, but posted it elsewhere on another movie blog...
April 26, 2006, 6:11 p.m. CST
Good job Mori. I think you may have saved fans of both franchises from a painfull disaster. And now that we know they're reading this, listen up: I pledge to not watch any AvP movie even remotely like the one reviewed! Back to the drawing board Fox. Drew was correct in his review about all the upteen other things we as fans would love to see in regard to this franchise, the Alien home world perhaps?? That would be tits. Or put them on earth if you must, but as someone else here mentioned waay in the future. How about a little continuity?
April 26, 2006, 8:42 p.m. CST
by 'Cholera's Ghost
Wouldn't it be kind of cool, if we see a Predator suddenly slash a marine's face with wristblades (that he/she doesn't want as a trophy), and they like, tear a double slash mark through his head--like, a big, bloody splintering of bone, like, through his forehead and right beneath his eyes across the top of his nose, and there's like, ragged brains and skull visible around the edges cut four inches deep in two places and stuff? I dunno. I think that would be cool. R rated, sure, but that's just getting back to basics.
April 26, 2006, 8:44 p.m. CST
...e-mail a complaint to FOX? I did...stand a be counted!!
April 26, 2006, 9:10 p.m. CST
that should be "stand AND be counted", I guess this writing thing is harder than I thought :-p
April 26, 2006, 9:11 p.m. CST
And despite what people are saying they still screwed the potential for that to be a REALLY good movie. Has anyone seen a photo of Cyclops after the lake scene?
April 26, 2006, 9:49 p.m. CST
Happening here: http://tinyurl.com/mcrab
Dec. 11, 2007, 4:56 p.m. CST
I'll bet the first victims on earth will be a father and son hunting expedition. Dad gets it first as the son watches on and then a face-hugger grabs the kid!!
Dec. 11, 2007, 5:44 p.m. CST
. . ..
April 1, 2008, 1:29 p.m. CST
April 1, 2008, 1:30 p.m. CST
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April 1, 2008, 1:32 p.m. CST
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