I am – Hercules!!

Will the president finally explain why Uncle Junior is overseeing Saddam’s trial??

If you’re confident nothing of import will be revealed at this evening’s State of the Union Address, take solace in the fact that tonight leads us toward February sweeps with the first of four new “Gilmore Girls” in a row.

This week’s installment, an Amy Sherman-Palladino-penned affair, sees Logan help Rory save the day when Paris nearly derails the Yale Daily News. Which leads to … a lot of other stuff. The Luke-Lorelai engagement is hanging by a thread follow the big April Nardini reveal. Richard and Emily learn that Rory’s dad is now footing her tuition, and the first four-Gilmore Friday-night dinner in nearly a year erupts into an epic 8-scene dust-up.

Superspoilers for future episodes nestle in the invisotext below:

* Paris will be sacked, and Rory will at last assume her rightful place as editor of the Yale Daily News.
* Paris kicks Rory out, and Rory begins cohabitating with Logan.
* Lane runs into Zack and Joel at Sophie’s music store.
* Christopher and his “other” daughter re-enter the picture after Rory participates on a panel of top college editors.
* Rory becomes Logan’s date at Honor Huntzberger’s wedding. Things remains tense.

8 p.m. Tuesday. The WB.

Herc’s Favorite DC Universe Tales Ever Collected in one beautiful 309-page $13.59 volume!!! DC Universe: The Stories Of Alan Moore!!