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Harry & the Rolling Roadshow Love Being A Goonie! In Astoria, Oregon! With Mouth!

Astoria, Oregon – I cross that first bridge into Astoria and there’s the Mikey’s house… right up there. I had no idea that it’d hit me instantly. For the people that love GOONIES, it’s impossible to explain to a non-Goonie. Take Moriarty for example. He’s a non-Goonie. It’s sad. We’re still friends, but he just doesn’t get it. Maybe Toshiro will help him get in touch with his inner-Goonie.

I believe everyone has one. Some seem to lose it the older they get, others… well others hang on to the joy of gadgets and practical jokes, the dream of adventures and the telling of tall tales… then of course there’s the anti-big business bit regarding the evil Republicans working to foreclose on the Goondocks. You gotta watch out for them Yuppie money-worshipping bastards that want to destroy childhood friendships all in favor of a larger golf course.

More than any of that, THE GOONIES is about being a dreamer and about best friends. That’s its universal appeal, and to geeks, prior to the strange societal shift that put us near the top of the food chain, this movie was one of those films we saw a billion times. I have to fight not saying dialogue in time with the movie. And no matter how many times I see it, I laugh like a freak at the same jokes and the same gags.

But this entire drive to Astoria – well it’s a long pilgrammage. I spent the night in Bruce Campbell’s town in Oregon – after a long drive up I-5. Ate amazing seafood in Redding, California at Buz’s Crab Shack where they had shrimp the size of your wrist and Blue Crab that was like God’s cockroaches! So good. And the Calamari… egods. Food of the Gods man, Food of the Gods. Only prob, the 107 degrees outside the restaurant. I had no idea that Northern California had that sort of heat. Shows what I know.

We spent the night in the town of Bruce, Medford, Oregon. I briefly thought about calling him, but then thought about a nice hotel bed, a warm shower and an early night’s rest – and well – good sense ruled the night. Besides, I think showing up on Bruce’s doorstep could possibly end with an introduction to his boomstick.

We took off early that next morning on our way to Astoria. It was going to be tight. A very long drive, not nearly as long as the next drive, but still the longest trek of the trip thus far. Oregon is gorgeous to go through. The Christmas Tree state, I call it. Though the sign that advertised, “KIDS FOR SALE,” threw me for a bit, till Dad pointed out that KID is a term for baby goats – but we pointed it out to my nephew as a place where perhaps we could get a trade in. Get a better kid, but upon further reflection… Other than his manic outbursts about “MY SPOON IS TOO BIG” and “I AM A BANANA!” – he’s a pretty good kid, and the kid we’d get in trade would eat the maps, bite into soda cans causing the inside of the car to be sprayed down with soda. I guess we’ll keep the kid we got.

Then we spotted a sign saying, “World’s Largest Spruce Tree.” You have to cross this one lane rickety bridge over a river that was… interesting. Then you enter the forest canopy. This is awesome. In here you can see that all of the Christmas trees have their branches covered with green moss. Really gorgeous. The tree is enormous. Being from Austin, I’m a tree freak – and seeing a Christmas tree that’s 56 ft around and 200 – some odd feet tall… well biggest and oldest Christmas tree ever. That’s cool.

However, the sun is beginning to go away – and we’re still a long way from Astoria, and we still haven’t eaten today. That’s when as we’re driving, I’m drawn to a city called SEASIDE. I haven’t really heard of it before, but it sounds like it has Lovecraft potential. As we pull into town we see… BIGFOOT’S PUB AND GRUB! Cheesy Americana! Must Go! Zero Will Power To Resist BIGFOOT PUB AND GRUB.

They’ve got Bigfoot Totems out front, but I’m particularly fond of the female Bigfoot statue, it’s classic. Fathergeek is griping about how this probably has awful food… I could care less – I mean – BIGFOOT! This is his place! The nephew’s “What’s Bigfoot?” is delicious – we go in, and we’re immediately confronted with… SASQUATCH! Here he is! Stuffed and inviting me to order today’s specials with his soft eyes. The menus are newspapers with the menu items dispersed between articles purporting real Bigfoot sightings.

The food did indeed blow – I had Bigfoot’s Mushroom Stroganoff, Dad had the seafood thing. But I’m happy, cuz bad food – in a wonderfully crass location… with hot as hell waitresses – well that’s great by me.

After that – we made our way into Astoria, and instantly I began smiling. GOONIES lives here. You can see it. Favorite site? Just some anonymous kid riding his bike down the street. Down one of the streets, the Goonies rode on. This is such a beautiful city, so much character.

We head into town, looking for the Football Field from the opening of the film. When we arrive, there’s already 5-6 people in line – about 3 hours ahead of time, including this one old lady – who has this terribly funky looking Schnauzer Poodle and a Shirt signed by Chunk – that says, “My RV Was Appears In The Original GOONIES – 1984!” You know – a pink sweatshirt with purple puffy letters? She’s absolutely thrilled that this is going on.

We head on into the football field, and instantly – I remember the brief moment of this place in GOONIES. Also – as everyone enters – they must do the Truffle Shuffle to get their complimentary Baby Ruth bar. Everybody – everybody goes “babuh wuff?” It’s great.

The place is filling up – several hundred have shown up, locals and travelers from Portland and Seattle… Along with us Austinites that have come so very far. As the sunsets and the big screen lights up – with everybody doing the Truffle Shuffle. The audience is laughing non-stop and enjoying it. All the Truffle Shuffling has been nicely edited together – and the audience is laughing and enjoying it all, though… the chunkier you are, the greater applause you get. I hate that the camera wasn’t set up yet when I came in. I’d do a truffle shuffle that would send California into the ocean.

After that – Tim comes out to introduce Corey Feldman – to thunderous applause. Corey shouts out his love of Astoria and all of Oregon. His band has played Oregon many times, but he insists he’ll bring it here to Astoria some day. Then he begins to comment upon the Truffle Shuffling that Tim had everyone do – but what Tim didn’t know. What none of us knew, was that Corey Feldman, Mouth, was going to force the several hundred folks in the football stadium and field to DO THE TRUFFLE SHUFFLE OR THERE WOULD BE NO GOONIES TONIGHT!

Watching several hundred folks – including myself standing and Truffle Shuffling before the might will of MOUTH… it was just one of those – OHMYGOD, THIS RULES moments. After that – Tim started up the trailer reel.

LICENSE TO DRIVE – insanity.

TEENAGE MUTANT NINJA TURTLES – I love being a turtle!

MEATBALLS 4 – There was a Meatballs 4?

FRIDAY THE 13th: THE FINAL CHAPTER – boy that felt out of place.

Then came THE GOONIES.

I love this film. It’s just a warm blanket film, one of those great kid films that I loved being a kid watching, and now just makes me feel like being a kid again. My nephew is obsessed with all things “PIRATE” so he’s all about this film. I wish I had time tomorrow to go down the coast looking for “the 3 rocks” and “the beach”. But I’ve got 1256 miles to go in the next 30 hours.

After the film – Corey came out to answer questions. He’s doing SUPER ROBOT TEAM MONKEY FORCE GO the movie – and he has a film called THE BIRTHDAY that’s coming out next year. GOONIES 2? Corey reports that everyone wants to do it, except Warner Brothers. He really wants to do it. He recalled his memories of seeing the Pirate Ship that first time and being stunned. Folks asked if they pushed the ship out to see at the end, and he confirmed that they absolutely did (wink wink) because the pirates needed to be set free!

On the way out of town – we drove past the Goondocks again, just to make note that the GOONIES had indeed saved them. How cool.

I’m finishing this report after CLOSE ENCOUNTERS at Devil’s Tower… As cool as GOONIES was – CEOT3K was… just amazing. As for now, must check out of my Gillette, Wyoming hotel and rush towards Canyon City, Colorado. CAT BALLOU in 2 days!

Readers Talkback
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  • Sept. 4, 2005, 1:03 p.m. CST


    by Holodigm

    am i first?

  • Sept. 4, 2005, 1:03 p.m. CST


    by Holodigm

    and everyone should be a Goonie

  • Sept. 4, 2005, 1:18 p.m. CST

    I'm taking 'em all back...

    by spiderinside

    ...Damn I wish I was there for this one. I luvs me some Goonies!

  • Sept. 4, 2005, 1:55 p.m. CST

    Wow, what a crowd!

    by SickPuppy

    Literally tens and tens of them! And getting a Baby Ruth for the Truffle Shuffle explains why the Truffle Shuffle is Harry's main means of locomotion.

  • Sept. 4, 2005, 2:02 p.m. CST

    " mean Mam!"

    by Rumpledink

    Where was 'Data'. That's what I want to know. DOesn't he work for a cgi company or something? Gooines 2 would be great. Even if the film sucked, seeing what all the goonies were doing now would be worth the price of addmission!

  • Sept. 4, 2005, 2:03 p.m. CST

    Harry's Nephew

    by Flummage

    That fella is having the ultimate geek child hood! He must be having the time of his life. I know I would be, and I'm in my twenties. Is it me, or is it enivatble, that at some point the younger geek will become more powerfull than the older geek? Eventually overthrowing him in some overwrought, tragic Star Wars inspired pardoy type event? Maybe with economy sized twinkies instead of lightsabers?

  • Sept. 4, 2005, 2:10 p.m. CST

    Astoria is beautiful

    by jrbarker

    I grew up in Portland and used to go to Seaside and Astoria all the time. Oregon is a beautiful place.

  • Sept. 4, 2005, 2:42 p.m. CST

    Besides having Goonie Fever, Oregon also has a hefty Piratecore

    by FrankDrebin

  • Sept. 4, 2005, 2:59 p.m. CST

    Great report!

    by I wonder

    I loved it! Thnx Harry!

  • Sept. 4, 2005, 3:01 p.m. CST

    Being in Oregon, I hoe you saw the film with a "bud."

    by el che'

    It's not the "greenest" state in the union for nutin'.

  • Sept. 4, 2005, 3:08 p.m. CST


    by loafroaster

    The Rolling Roadshow has to be the coolest event I've ever heard of! In Belfast, the closest we got was when Stella Artois did Jaws in a boat around the Lagan...although it was at midnight so it was pretty creepy. Ideas for forthcoming events...Blair Witch Project in a forest? The Shining in an abandoned hotel? House of the Dead in a toilet? And that Goonies poster ROCKS!

  • Sept. 4, 2005, 3:19 p.m. CST

    los instrumentos de tortura sexual de mr. Walsh

    by CuervoJones

    inmortal movie, indeed

  • Sept. 4, 2005, 7:22 p.m. CST

    Teh Suk: I might be.

    by el che'

    Why, you a narc, man? Cuz I know nothing.


  • Sept. 4, 2005, 8:07 p.m. CST

    Great Article Harry

    by hallmitchell

    Great photos. This is the best website in the universe.

  • Sept. 4, 2005, 9:07 p.m. CST


    by Gungan Slayer

    once again, I'm just sitting around doing boring crap while Harry's on this kick ass roadshow. Goonies own. Period.

  • Sept. 4, 2005, 9:10 p.m. CST

    Oregon is fucking beautiful

    by DOGSOUP

    I love my state. I've been to that tree lots of time and it's incredible. The current mayor of Portland is trying to work tax breaks for people who want to film here. Perhaps we can get a better movie filmed here than The Hunted.

  • Sept. 4, 2005, 9:30 p.m. CST

    Portland/Oregon movies...

    by jrbarker

    Yeah, the Hunted sucked. So did Bandits. Drugstore Cowboy was good. And Kindegarden Cop was fun back in the day.

  • Sept. 4, 2005, 9:43 p.m. CST

    that camera has some serious chromatic aberration

    by Sir Loin

    The purple fringing! Make it stop!

  • Sept. 5, 2005, 1:38 a.m. CST

    Bruce wouldn't have been in Medford

    by Bishma

    The chin is on a book tour right now. When Harry was in Medford Bruce was... somewhere. I know he was in Anchorage on the 2nd because my girlfriend went to his signing and the screening for the Man with the Screaming Brain. And when my gf was talking to him, Oregon was brought up because it's where we live, he mentioned that he hadn't been home in a couple weeks.

  • Sept. 5, 2005, 2:18 a.m. CST

    Man, I wish I was there

    by Goonie

    Sounds like an AWESOME event!

  • Sept. 5, 2005, 8:22 a.m. CST

    I love you Harry

    by Bodhizattwa

    You're my goonie!

  • Sept. 5, 2005, 8:32 a.m. CST

    Greatest film the world has ever known

    by Mr Bungle

    All my film-loving life, I've compared everything I've seen to the feelings I had the first 10 times I watched the Goonies, and nothing (besides Monster Squad - but that's alot lamer when you rewatch it as a 23 year old) and nothing has ever come close. Nothing. Watched it again at the Electric Pinic festival in Stradbally at the weekend, big screen, hundreds watching, everybody cheering for every quip, everybody jumping up and down and hugging for the ending, pure ecstasy. I tell you this...If everybody was to watch the Goonies together every week or so, the world would be a better place. It's fucking therapeutic stuff, I relived my childhood that day through drunken eyes.

  • Sept. 6, 2005, 12:27 a.m. CST

    And it was the best night ever!

    by bugeye1182

    We hit Astoria about a half hour before sunset. Driving from Salem, she found out where we were going just as we pulled into town. As we entered Warren Field we were encouraged to do the

  • Sept. 9, 2005, 9:35 p.m. CST

    There are Goonies and then there are just Goons

    by TheMostHorrible

    I worked with this tool named Curtis who played asst bank manager number 3 or something (I know the character had a name, because he would drop it all the time, but I don't recall it,and google didn't help)Anyways, he was some guy who dropped by to tell the kids about a house being foreclosed upon or something. Well you'd think he was nominated for best supporting actor the way he chatted on about the role and his pals "Steven" and "Richard" and even "Corey". (By the way,somehow he predicted Corey's arc of fame and infamy, success and failure way back then...if only he'd had more of a role in his life. If it were half as grand as his role in Goonies, Curtis would've groomed Corey into a Nobel Prize winner.) In local theater he is well known for throwing cast parties at his home and--Oops! What's that cued up on the VCR? Goonies?! Well if it isn't asst bank mgr number 3's scene. Let's watch it...again. Now he's a boozy old retiree playing the aged roles in this and that, but hanging onto that Goonies thing like it was his nitro pills, God bless him. My point here is: yes, they apparently did pass that bill DOGSOUP mentioned giving incentives to companies filming in Oregon. So hopefully that means more movies will bring more roles to more actors in this state and Curtis might get another, more interesting role he can yammer on about...because when he isn't bragging about his 15 seconds of Goonies fame he's sharing too much about his prostate surgery. He needs new stories. So Hollywood: please, for Curtis, come to Oregon and let's work.

  • Sept. 10, 2005, 8 a.m. CST

    "Booty-traps!!! Thats what I said...BOOTYTRAPS!!!!"

    by DarthNameless

    Greatest Movie ev-er.