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AICN COMICS REVIEWS! DRAGONLANCE! BIRDS OF PREY! DEVIL'S REJECTS! AND MORE INDIE JONES!!!
#14 | 8/17/05 | align=right> #4 |
(Click title to go directly to the review)
SNAKE-EYES: DECLASSIFIED #1
BIRDS OF PREY #85
DEFENDERS #2
DEVIL’S REJECTS #1
ULTIMATE SPIDER-MAN ANNUAL #1
DRAGONLANCE CHRONICLES #1
NEW THUNDERBOLTS #11
GREEN LANTERN #3
Indie Jones presents ROCKETO # 1
Indie Jones presents HERO@LARGE #1
Indie Jones presents MASKED COMMANDER
CHEAP SHOTS!
SNAKE-EYES: DECLASSIFIED #1 (of 6)
Writer: Brandon Jerwa
Artist: Emiliano Santalucia
Publisher: Devil's Due Publishing
Reviewed by Dave Farabee
Snake-Eyes' origin?
Didn't they already cover that about twenty years ago in G.I. JOE 26 and 27?
Ah, but this is an expanded origin. When Larry Hama covered the team’s most enigmatic member way back when, he just gave readers flashbulb snippets of Snake-Eyes' dark past - a few key firefights in Vietnam, the fateful injury that left him scarred and mute, the ninja training...all glimpsed, but still mysterious. Hama didn't even show Snake-Eyes speaking in any of the flashbacks.
The biggest question surrounding a follow-up, of course, is whether filling in the gaps makes the character more interesting or not. Do you find Wolverine more intriguing for ORIGIN's reveal his name is James and he caught colds as a kid? Does Boba Fett resonate more because the prequels showed his pop getting punked-out by Sam Jackson?
Or is it sometimes better to leave mystery-types as mysteries?
I think you know where this is going.
But truth be told, this isn't a bad little issue, just superfluous and clunky in some key spots. We do see Snake-Eyes speak, with writer Brandon Jerwa giving us glimpses of him at home before Vietnam as well as caught up in the thick of the war, and I'm pleased to say he's the guy he should be: troubled, taciturn, patriotic, and moral. Jerwa also shows him struggling with faith, an element I believe original to this series, but it didn't feel out of place. I liked it. Unfortunately, the same conversation with his dad that reveals his faith also reveals the origin of his codename, and it's a painfully contrived attempt to lend some meaning to it. I think it would've been best to leave the explanation more prosaic, never having been a fan of origin stories that over-explain key elements of a hero's mythos (e.g. "We named the dog Indiana!").
During the Vietnam sequences, Jerwa does a good job of keeping up with Hama's groundwork, with Stalker as the consummate platoon leader, future bad guy Wade Collins already showing some paranoia, and Tommy - aka Storm Shadow - as the one guy who manages to form a friendship with Snake-Eyes. Some of the Snake-Eyes/Tommy exchanges are pretty rough, alas. There's a "mission statement" vibe to everything Snake-Eyes says that has the same problem as his earlier waxing about his faith. These scenes just scream "HERE IS A KEY ASPECT TO THE CHARACTER!", and while I buy all the observations, I just wish the book had been more artful in delivering 'em.
Art throughout is solid, the kind of detailed, well-researched, military-friendly stuff you might find on the current PUNISHER series. Artist Emiliano Santalucia also does a good job of recreating several key panels from Hama's original run, though those may inadvertently work against the book for fans of the original JOE series. I see those iconic images Hama drew, and removed from their original, weighty context and placed in a talkier format, they feel hamstrung. For instance, there's a great page in the original origin story where we see a young version of the Joe's commander, Hawk, having to deliver the news to the recently discharged Snake-Eyes that his entire family was killed in a car wreck. There's no dialogue in the scene, just Hawk's narrative captions recalling the painful scene even as the “camera” zooms in on Snake-Eyes' bandaged face, brilliantly passive and unreadable under mirrored sunglasses. It's a powerful scene in its understatement, but in the expanded edition, the creators make a fatal error in filling the scene with the actual dialogue of the moment, reducing the mythic to the commonplace. It should feel legendarily tragic. Instead it feels perfunctory.
I'm vaguely curious to see where the series goes from here - next issue gets into all the ninja stuff - but suspicion is high that it'll just leave me, as all the other JOE relaunches have left me, with an increasing appreciation for what Larry Hama did twenty years ago with a toy-based comic that was better than it had any right to be.
BIRDS OF PREY #85
Writer: Gail Simone
Penciler(s): Joe Bennett & Eddy Barrows
Publisher: DC Comics
Reviewed by Humphrey Lee
What we have here is the resolution of two major plot threads that have been running through BIRDS OF PREY for at least a half a year or more. The bigger
issue at hand is that after months of fighting off the Brainiac virus Barbara Gordon was infected with early into Ms. Gail's run on this book, we finally get to her surgery to hopefully remove the virus, though the odds aren't in her favor. And on the other side of the coin we have the mother of all martial arts showdowns as Black Canary and her assembled crew of some of the DCU's more potent martial artists face off against The Twelve Brothers, a group of "legendary" martial arts masters that Gail has been building up for several months now. And at the end of the day what we get here is another great issue from Gail Simone and company, one that is filled with great dramatic bits, very solid action, and, quite frankly, one of the more touching endings I've seen in a comic all year.
First, I want to talk about the action, and with that, the art. As you might have noticed above, this months art chores are split between regular artist Joe Bennett and a man I'm unfamiliar with, Eddy Barrows. As far as the transition goes between the two artists, it's for the most part pretty fluid. Overall, it's pretty noticeable whenever the two switch off, but it's never detracting as Barrows’ stuff is very solid. In fact, there are a couple times where it is even debatable who's doing what page thanks to similar styles but different inkers and so on. The point is, the switching doesn't hurt the book, though at the same time, with such an important issue you wish that it was all the same artists to keep up the pace. And as I said earlier, half the book is action, so you have to watch out that you don't lose the dynamic between the pages. But the action does come through very well. Canary's team of some of the world's top fighters is very impressive. We get a group of BIRDS OF PREY regulars in Huntress and Savant and his partner Creote, but we also see some of the more "scary-good" fighters in Connor Hawke and Richard Dragon and Ted "Wildcat" Grant. For a Kung Fu lover like myself, that is just the mother load. And the Twelve Brothers bring the goods too. Gail has done a great job of building them as a physical threat throughout the past couple issues, and continues to do so this issue through Canary's internal assessment of the conflict.
And then we have Barbara's fight. Again, Gail has done a great job of keeping Babs on the cusp of a blend of emotions the past couple issues to make the whole situation much more dramatic. At times she's as tough as nails and ready to fight for her life, and then there are the quiet moments where she shows some frailty. We see more of both those aspects this issue as we get some time between Babs and her father, James Gordon, and we see that Babs is not one to sit and let all the others do the work as she wages her own little "war" on the Brainiac virus while under the knife. The resolution to it all though, comes off as a little sudden, but it's not like it's totally improbable or unexpected. To be honest it's probably more a victim of "running out of time" so to speak, as this issue definitely seems like it could have used a few more pages. If there's any major fault to this issue, that would be it right there. But once you get to that ending, those minor problems just become distant as that last page just tugs right at your own emotions.
A rollercoaster... that's what these past couple issues have been. And this book has definitely been a fun ride.
DEFENDERS #2
Writer: Keith Giffen/J.M. DeMatteis
Artist: Kevin Maguire
Publisher: Marvel Comics
Reviewer: Prof. Challenger
My main trouble was that I had no sense of humor.
-- The Frankenstein Monster
Okay, here's the deal. DEFENDERS is one of my favorite comics published right now. It is hysterically funny the way these characters interact with each other. This issue finds our intrepid team taking on Dormammu in his own dimension where he rather easily, with the help of his sister, Umar, takes down the Defenders. There's serious threat going on, but I'm so busy laughing, I can't even worry too much about it. Anyway, I went and called dibs on this comic while I was in the midst of oxygen constriction from laughing so hard. The trouble is that unless someone's actually reading this comic already, I can't quite put into words exactly how to present the unique humor that pervades this book panel after panel after panel. So, this time around, I thought, why not try something different? So I called JoeyDaQ and requested a publicity interview with the main players in DEFENDERS #2. JoeyDaQ said something like "Publicity???? FREE Publicity???? Am I a publicity whore?????" And I said something like, "Huh?" And then JoeyDaQ said something like "When do you want 'em?" And I said something like "Maybe Sunday night?" And he said something like "Done." And then I said something like "Hey, while I've got you on the phone, can you tell me why an after-the-fact string bikini was drawn onto the obviously naked Umar throughout the first half of DEFENDERS #2?" And then I think I heard JoeyDaQ say something like "Um…pizza's here. Gotta go." *click*
And that's how it happened. So, after a quick plane ride from Texas to New York I sat down in the Marvel Towers Presidential Hotel Suite with all the major players and interviewed them about their experiences working on DEFENDERS #2. So, without further ado, may I present Hulk, Namor, Dr. Strange, and Dormammu.
UMAR: *ahem* And Umar.
PROF: ....and Umar. Anyway....to kick off the discussion and since he's the one featured on the cover, let me ask Hulk: What is your most vivid memory of working on DEFENDERS #2?
HULK: Fish-man smells like sewer! Hey, why Hulk talking like this? Hulk not talk like this for years now!! Hulk know Fish-man's name is Nay-more!
PROF: Um...sorry. I just think it's always funnier when you talk in that idiot-Tonto-kind-of-talk. Here's some beans.
HULK: Mmmm. Hulk love beans!
PROF: So, what do you mean, "Namor smells like the sewer"?
HULK: Hulk hate snooty Fish-man! He stinks like dirty bathroom!
PROF: Namor?
NAMOR: The imperial blood-king of Atlantis stinks not! You are nothing more than a mindless gargantuan green gorilla!
HULK: *munch* Hulk love beans!
PROF: Actually, there is a certain...sewer...stench about you. Did you happen to swim up the Hudson to get here?
NAMOR: Of course. Why?
PROF: *ahem* Namor, perhaps you could share your favorite memory about working on DEFENDERS #2.
NAMOR: I was most satisfied by the absence of my belly button.
PROF: -- the Hell?
NAMOR: No. My belly button.
PROF: You don't have a belly button?
NAMOR: No. Check every panel featuring my glorious near-naked form. No belly button. IMPERIUS REX! I tire of talking with you. The Royal Prince is now ignoring you and the rest of these useless wastes of minimal intelligence.
DR. STRANGE: Maybe you could go take a warm shower with some deodorant soap.
NAMOR: What did you say?!?!
DR. STRANGE: I said nothing.
NAMOR: You said something!!!!
DR. STRANGE. Nothing. I assure you.
NAMOR: You said something. *flits into bathroom*
HULK: Hulk hate DEFENDERS #2!
PROF: What? Why?
HULK: Hulk drawn with green ropes wrapped all around him!!!! Stupid, puny ropes!!!
PROF: Erm. Actually, I think those are supposed to be bulging veins. You know? To show how huge and strong you are.
HULK: Hulk hate ropes!!!! But Hulk is strongest one there is!!! Hulk break stupid ropes!!!
PROF: Ho-kay.... Hey, Hulk, I hear Namor stole some of your beans and is hiding them in the shower right now. Why don't you go get them back?
HULK: Fish-man!!!! Give Hulk beans back!!!!!
*THUD!*THUMP!*CRASH!*
PROF: Dr. Strange, one of the things I really enjoy about this comic is how you act like you're so oblivious to all the jokes made at your expense. *laughter*
DR. STRANGE: I'm sorry, I don't follow you.
PROF: You know. *laughter* Oh, come on!
DR. STRANGE: I'm sorry.
PROF: Um..well...all those silly incantations, the puffy pirate shirt look, the 70s porn star moustache, oh...*laughter*...and the hysterical implications of you and Wong being...well...you know....
DR. STRANGE: By the Hoary Hohos of Hogwarts, you confuse my superior mind!
PROF: *ahem* Okay. Switching gears -- did you have any problems working with Hulk and Namor this time around? I noticed they aren't particularly fond of you.
DR. STRANGE: By the Astounding Ass of Arcturus Rann what a confounding statement you utter! The emerald-skinned one and the frilly-winged ankle-flyer are among my closest acquaintances -- they and the handsome, strapping and talented Wong, of course. *dreamy faraway look in his eyes* Oh, yes, and my other closest friend is the Silver Surfer, but he declined my invitation to put his life at risk once more in the multi-dimensional battle with the dreadfully dread...he who must not be named.
PROF: Um. You can say Dormammu here.
DR. STRANGE: Verily?
PROF: Yeah uh-HUH.
DR. STRANGE: Okay...DORMAMMU!
UMAR: And Umar.
DR. STRANGE: ...yes...and Umar. Anyway, the spaceway-spanning Surfer declined my offer but also clouded mine mystical mojo with a supernatural incantation introduced to him by a bronzed goddess of the surf.
PROF: What was that?
DR. STRANGE: “Cowabunga.” Have you ever encountered such an eerie and unsettling word?
PROF: ???
*CRASH*BLAM*WHEEZOO*KER-PLOSH*
PROF: Whoa! What the...?
HULK: Hulk smash green panty-man!!!!!
NAMOR: Only if you catch me, you witless Neanderthal with the brains of an anemone!!!!
PROF: Wow. Uh…see you later guys! Well, I guess Hulk and Namor have opted out of the rest of this...hey Doc, where're YOU going?
DR. STRANGE: By the Vintage Viagra of the Virile Vishanti, I must depart this dwelling to join my compatriots in their joyful antics!
PROF: ....... So, here we are now, just me and the dread Dormammu...
UMAR: And Umar.
PROF: ...and Umar. In DEFENDERS #2, you seem an unbeatable team. Even the Defenders are powerless before you. What...
DORMAMMU: Thank you. Let me first say, that it is an honor for you to speak to me as I am soon to be your Lord and Master of my domain. Second, I would like to address...
UMAR: What a gasbag.
DORMAMMU! Aaaaarrrrrgghhh! WHY DO YOU ALWAYS DO THAT TO ME?!?!? I can't even get two FRIGGIN' words out and there you are interrupting and insulting me! It's as bad as when Mommy took us to visit the Diz'nee Dimension that summer and you kept holding your finger half an inch from my face! Practically TOUCHING me!!!!! You horrid witch!!!!!
*whimper* boo-hoo-hoo*
I love you so much, sister. Please forgive me...
PROF: Whu-What's going....
DORMAMMU: SILLLLLENNNNNNCCCCCE!!! You interrupt the dread DORMAMMU????!!!! NOW YOU MUST DIE!!!!
*ZAP*POOF*
UMAR: Smooth move, Dipshit. Now the interview's over.
DORMAMMU: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!
THE DEVIL'S REJECTS #1
Writer: Rob Zombie
Art: Nick Stakal, David Hartman, and Michael Lopez
Publisher: IDW Publishing
Reviewer: Ambush Bug
This is one hell of a book. In the same way that Rob Zombie kicked your front teeth out and bitch slapped your momma with this summer’s vicious circus of violence and mayhem THE DEVIL’S REJECTS, this one-shot from IDW will easily be remembered as one of the more disturbing experiences I’ve had the pleasure of laying my eyes on in a long time. Maybe it’s due to the fact that a lot of horror has been tamed down in cinema and books lately. I don’t know, but I was smitten from frame one of the movie that inspired this book and now I’m glad to say the feeling has transferred to the page. Zombie takes these despicable characters and gives them the spotlight with three vignettes, each focusing on members of the family known as The Devil’s Rejects.
The book starts out with a filthy trip through the mind of the devious Captain Spaulding. “Top Secret Clown Business” is an origin story of sorts as seen through the eyes of (easily) the scariest clown I’ve ever seen. Nick Stakal, who I last saw drawing IDW’s zombies-on-a-space-station miniseries, CONTAINMENT, supplies some disturbing, yet cartoonish panels which fit the demented clown’s story to a tee. As with the movie, I found myself laughing at the violence, and then reeling back at the intensity of it all. With this Captain Spaulding character especially, Zombie has a talent to entertain and then make me feel bad for being entertained by the carnage I just witnessed.
This is a theme that carries over into the second tale, “Carnival Kill Ride.” What Zombie does here is take the devilish characters of Otis B. Driftwood and his homicidal sister Baby and puts them into a comical situation: two killers go on a House of Horrors carnival ride at the state fair. Seeing these real terrors guffawing at the horrors in the ride is worth a chuckle or two, but soon, when these two get bored, they decide to turn the ride into a real house of horrors. It isn’t the murders that occur that disturbed me about this story; it was how far these characters go with the wanton destruction of their victims. Without an ounce of remorse or restrain, artist David Hartman depicts these characters as animals; utterly destroying their prey for the sheer thrill of the kill.
But I think it was the last tale, featuring Captain Spaulding, Baby, and Sigmund Freud of all people, that was the most memorable to me. By far, this is the best art of the bunch. I’ve never seen Michael Lopez’ stuff before, but I will definitely seek out his work in the future. His iconic splash page of a blood splattered Baby being protected by a gun-toting Captain Spaulding is easily the most memorable image of the book. In this story, Sigmund Freud analyzes these two deviants, dissecting their psyches and noting the methodology that inspires the madness that these two inflict on all of those unlucky enough to cross their paths.
This book is not for your Aunt Trudy who knits you scarves for Christmas. It’s not for Pastor Thomas or that girl that goes “eww!” at everything or that kid who wets himself whenever a car honks its horn. It’s dirty. It’s rough. It’s despicable. It made me laugh at the horror of violence, then feel bad about that reaction for a moment, but just a moment. Pretty soon, though, I just said “Fuck it.” and laughed again at how utterly badass and ballsy it all is and went along for this ride into the sick, the sadistic, and the surreal. This book highlights some of the best horror-type art out there today. From the Stakal’s warped panels, to Hartman’s hyper-violence, to those final iconic images by Micheal Lopez. There isn’t a horror book out there that looks better. I’d love to see Rob Zombie visit these characters again in celluloid or comic book form. He definitely has a firm handle on these Rejects and if this book is any indication, he’s definitely got more stories to tell.
ULTIMATE SPIDER-MAN ANNUAL #1
Brian Michael Bendis: Writer
Mark Brooks: Artist
Marvel Comics: Publisher
Vroom Socko: Settling down with a nice Jewish girl
I’ve got to tell you, this book left me both exhilarated and entertained, but also conflicted and uncertain about where this whole thing is going. Which, since this story is essentially a budding teenage romance, is probably exactly the right way to feel.
Plot-wise, this book is pretty simple. Peter Parker, who’s just broken up with MJ, gets a phone call from Kitty Pride, who’s just broken up with Iceman. And the two of them go on a date. That’s it, really. Well, the date does involve beating the hell out of ultimate whipping boy The Shocker, but yeah, it’s just a first date.
Which is not to say the story sucks. Far from it.
Bendis has crafted one helluva comic here. The setup/buildup to the moment when these two meet is narrative perfection. Right from the get go Bendis expertly shows just how and why these two characters would make a perfect item. What makes it especially fun is that not only is this relationship NOT a riff on a Marvel Classic event, but it’s something that could only exist in the Ultimate brand. I mean really, if the originals were to date, it’d be much too creepy. (See Chuck Austen’s Angel/Husk statutory rape storyline for a clearer example.)
Artwise, this is the first major work I’ve seen from Mark Brooks, other than the recent flashback scenes in AMAZING SPIDER-MAN. And is it my imagination, or did the villain of that piece have a cameo? In any case, while I wouldn’t want Bagley to go anywhere anytime soon, this Brooks fellah would certainly be a worthy successor. This book is essentially three or four conversations between two teens, (with some action on the side,) and Brooks makes sure that none of it is boring. Just watching the facial expressions during their phone conversation is proof enough of that.
What I really enjoyed about this book is that, as I said earlier, it’s something completely new. Bendis is taking the character of Spider-Man in a direction he’s never been in before. Rather than have him hook up with the Black Cat, or fiddle around with creating Ultimate Kangaroo or some such, Bendis gave us this. What I especially love about it is the unintentional subtext to the relationship. Think about it, high school geek Peter Parker is dating a girl who physically isn’t there! At least he won’t be lying when he tells people he met his girlfriend while fighting a Wolverine!
But then, there’s the uncertain part I mentioned. Because, like it or not, this book doesn’t exist in a vacuum. There’s Ultimate Spider-Man #78 out there, the book where MJ expresses her undying love for Peter, and that she’s going to try to win him back. And there’s the fact that Bendis is a natural born sadist (I mean that in the nicest way possible) who loves to torture his fans. I can easily see MJ turning into some sort of possessive stalker over this. Hell, Bendis could even have her get killed by an enraged “You’ll take me seriously now” Shocker, simply because nobody would see it coming. All I know is that this little triangle isn’t going to be pretty; this is Bendis we’re talking about. He just loves to fuck with us.
Then again, that’s all stuff that’s coming up, or may never come up at all. For right now, for this issue, what we have here is a whole lot of fun wrapped up in a neat little package. All in all, it’s a great first date.
DRAGONLANCE CHRONICLES #1 (of 8)
Original story: Margaret Weis & Tracy Hickman
Adaptation script: Andrew Dabb
Artist: Steve Kurth
Publisher: Devil's Due Publishing
Reviewed by Dave Farabee
I don’t know if kids even read these days, but if you were a school-age geek back in the mid-to-late ‘80s, there’s a good chance you went through the rite of passage of reading the DRAGONLANCE novels. They were the first real push into fiction from guys behind the DUNGEONS & DRAGONS games, and what they lacked in craft – which was plenty – they made up for with a weighty, Tolkien-esque tone that belied their commercial origins. The ensemble cast was memorable, too, featuring a half-elf struggling with his heritage, an over-the-hill dwarf with heart problems, and everyone’s favorite antihero, Raistlin, an asshole magic user continually dumping on his utterly devoted lug of a brother.
I think I’m supposed to be a little embarrassed about being into this stuff back in the day and remembering it fondly now - I’ve looked back on the books, and the craft really is pretty shaky – but I’m not. If anything, the books remind me of the superhero comics that resonated with me as a kid, and I’m certainly not ashamed of them. None of my favorite comics of the ‘80s were completely free of pulp clichés or untouchably artful (try re-reading Miller’s DAREDEVIL – it’s got some groaners amidst the greatness), but at their best they were possessed of a heady blend of larger-than-life adventure and gravitas that overcame their technical failings.
So it was with DRAGONLANCE, and with that as preface, it’s time to see whether the flawed-but-fondly-remembered series holds up as sequential art…
The story, for you kiddies, oldsters, and hipsters who’d sooner re-read Tolkein’s SILMARILLION for the tenth time than read a fantasy novel based on a game, begins with the reunion of a group of adventurers after several years apart. They include an elf, a dwarf, a knight, a magic user, a Hobbit knock-off – plenty of the usual standards. And it’s the classic gaming scenario for those familiar with the games – “the characters all meet at an inn…” – but the backdrop of a world where the old, true gods have seemingly abandoned the people is an interesting one. The heroes all have their own personal angst to deal with, but they’re also looking for faith (it’s perhaps noteworthy that one of the series’ original co-writers is a devoted Mormon). Ironically, religious fervor is on the rise in their world, but only at the hands of charlatans and the power-hungry.
So they meet at an inn and all hell breaks loose.
There’s a portent of the old gods, a clash with some goblins, a guy getting pitched into a fireplace, and a harried escape in a treetop town that’s a little like the Ewok village in RETURN OF THE JEDI. It’s all drawn by Steve Kurth, clearly matured from his early G.I. JOE work and rather faithful to the designs of the ‘80s D&D paintings associated with the books. His action scenes are clear and energetic, his character work suitably detailed (if occasionally off in the particulars). At times he nearly ends up overshadowed by the book’s colorist, though. Djoko Santiko wields a mean digital paintbrush and establishes a look suggestive of rich oil paints over Kurth’s pencils. At a glance it looks great, almost HEAVY METAL caliber, but closer inspection reveals those metallic gleams and evocative nighttime effects are making up for some very minimal backgrounds. I’ve always felt a sense of setting is vitally important to these quasi-medieval jaunts, and after seeing through the glitz of the art, I regret to say it falls short on that count. More shots of the treetop city would’ve been a start, but all the locations could’ve used the impressive attention given the characters.
On a fannish level: barmaid Tika’s not cute enough, mysterious old man Fizban needs to be more roguish and less creepy looking, Sturm doesn’t look haggard enough, Tasselhoff’s chin is too “Jay Leno”, and the first appearance of Raistlin, with his hourglass eye pupils and pasty skin, isn’t nearly as startling as it should’ve been. Overly picky on my part? Maybe, but we’re talking well-known material and characters with a pre-existing visual history from all those Larry Elmore book covers. It’s gonna get scrutiny.
Personality-wise, all the characters are in place and faithful to their prose counterparts. Flint the dwarf has mysteriously gained a brogue that seems to work, and one of the bad guys has mysteriously gained a stutter that doesn’t. The feel is there, though, far more than I’d expect from, say, a Hollywood adaptation. It’s nice to see these characters again, a motley crew of flawed, arguing friends reminiscent of superhero teams like The Avengers or the X-Men at their best. For getting that right and for featuring an art team whose enthusiasm is felt enough to expect growth, DRAGONLANCE CHRONICLES will keep this nostalgic fan watching. Readers looking for a comic to scratch the swords ‘n’ sorcery itch could certainly do worse.
NEW THUNDERBOLTS #11
Writer: Fabian Nicieza
Artists: Tom Grummett (penciller)/Gary Erskine (inker)
Publisher: Marvel Comics
Reviewer: Prof. Challenger
*NOTE TO READERS* This review by Prof. Challenger was written before he conducted the interview intended to be a part of his review of DEFENDERS #2. Due to the unfortunate…resolution of that review, this may very well be his last published writing. If anyone out there could inform the powers that be at AICN as to the whereabouts of our A.W.O.L. Sorcerer Supreme since he bounded out of the Presidential Suite on Sunday, it would be appreciated. According to Wong, only Dr. Strange knows the frickin' incantation necessary to rehydrate a human who's been incinerated by the Dread Dormammu…
UMAR: And Umar.
Yes, and Umar. Thank you for your help in this important matter. Now back to the review.
Have I mentioned before that I think this whole HOUSE OF M stuff is crap? Well, even if I have, I'm eating crow regarding this particular tie-in. NEW THUNDERBOLTS proves how a creative team can take an insipidly derivative by-the-numbers crossover non-event like HOUSE OF M to produce an excellent stand-alone issue tied into said crossover non-event.
I present for your consideration the latest issue of NEW THUNDERBOLTS. Let me tell you how well-done this single issue is. Not only does it actually make the HOUSE OF M storyline sound intriguing, it also made me care about a character I have generally loathed ever since he appeared on the scene. I'm talking, of course, about Capt. Marvel, Jr./Genis.
When NEW T-BOLTS came on the scene about a year ago, the one reservation I had about the series was the inclusion of Capt. Marvel, I mean, Photon. Everybody else, I was fine with. But here you go taking this icky crossover issue and making me start to like the guy. In the HOUSE OF M continuity, Capt. Marvel (Ms. Marvel in the "real" world) and the Kree are hunting the Thunderbolts who are outlaw freedom fighters battling against mutant tyranny. Private Genis-Vell is a member of the Kree army helping Capt. Marvel out. He's not known to have any powers in this reality but he keeps becoming overwhelmed by a sense of time and space distortion that gives him glimpses into the world as it is supposed to be. His innate cosmic awareness is trying to alert him to the fact that the universe as he knew it has drastically changed.
But this issue is also a character piece for Eric Josten/Atlas. In this changed reality, he is Maj. Josten, leader of a human fighting force called the Howling Commandos. Maj. Josten is publicly serving the cause of the Mutant/Kree alliance, while secretly a leader in the Human Underground Resistance planning to kill the Kree as a springboard toward an alliance with the Shi'ar against the mutants. Genis-Vell, however, sees glimpses of who Josten is in the "real" world and challenges him with that vision. For example, at one point Genis challenges him with this line: "If you had the choice, which would you rather be - a good man on a world doomed to extinction or a bad man on a world filled with potential?" Ultimately, both Genis and Josten are faced with a decision whether to sacrifice their lives and run the risk of utterly destroying the only reality they remember.
Some of the little things, for me, were the most fun. I don't know which things are actually part of the HOUSE OF M overall or just revelations unique to the NEW THUNDERBOLTS comic, but here's a few that I liked. Gen. "Dum-Dum" Dugan's appearance as a leader in the Human Underground Resistance was appropriate and made me wonder where Fury was in this whole HOUSE OF M thing. I was surprised by the fate of Rick Jones in the HOUSE OF M reality, especially considering how central he has been to alternate reality stories in the past and Capt. Mar-vell particularly. The bits with Josten driving the "Atlas" class Sentinel was sheer brilliance in both concept and imagery. Killgrave's secretive recognition as a hero in the HOUSE OF M reality. This showed how so often the line between hero and villain may be shaped more by circumstance than an intrinsically "good" or "evil" nature.
I'm not going to spoil the whole thing for you though. I will challenge you to pick it up and see if I'm not right about this comic. It has action, intriguing revelations, great art, and consistently solid characterization. For a cross-over non-event tie-in, this comic was a total and pleasant surprise.
GREEN LANTERN #3
Writer: Geoff Johns
Artist: Carlos Pacheco
Publisher: DC Comics
Reviewed by Dave Farabee
This issue wraps the first arc on the relaunched GREEN LANTERN, now with 100% more Hal Jordan. Having enjoyed its miniseries predecessor, GREEN LANTERN: REBIRTH, before DC’s gloomy new editorial direction drove me into a superhero malaise, I had a notion to look in on the ongoing and see how things were shaping up. And it worked out for me.
Good book!
As the issue opens, Hal Jordan’s in a bit of a spot because he’s got to deal with a defective version of one of the already-murderous Manhunter robots. The Manhunters were the original space cops created by the same aliens who would go on to create the Green Lantern Corps to supersede them (turns out unfeeling robots make for crappy cops). The Manhunters are bad news in general, and if you do happen to beat one, they have a tendency to pop like a nuke. And that’s the old model of Manhunter. There’s also a new model on the scene, and it’s about equally interested in destroying its predecessor (even if it nukes the newly rebuilt Coast City in the process) and fulfilling it’s plain-Jane normal objective: “Terminate all life.”
I guess this could be considered same-ol’ same-ol’ when it comes to supervillains, but there’s a scene that instantly sets the frantic tone for the issue on page 3, a scene that made the threat immediate and scary. Green Lantern’s just started duking it out with Manhunter 2.0 when we get a caption of its internal thoughts as it evaluates the source of his power: “Willpower nexus located on right hand,” it recognizes, and then, immediately, it formulates its plan of action: “Remove hand.” It starts crushing his wrist and…
Well, best to let you see for yourself, but suffice to say it kicks the issue into high gear straightaway. Most of what follows is a running chase between Hal and the two Manhunters with memorable moments throughout. In particular, I liked the idea that this new Manhunter has a variant of a Green Lantern power battery actually powering it from within. When Hal starts slingin’ energy at it, it just uses the battery to start siphoning his power at high speed, and suddenly his ring’s running on empty. When the two Manhunters take their fight to the air and Hal’s left just standing there, ring all but drained, he begins working up one hell of a Plan B…
“I need a ride.” And he turns to a nearby F-16.
It’s a beautifully inspired moment, and the culmination of three issues reestablishing Hal’s ties to the Air Force and love of flight. As when Geoff Johns took over on THE FLASH, his writing cuts to the heart of the character, building up the elements that make him cool and, most of all, unique from other heroes. If Hal’s going to be a test pilot, Johns is going to use that for everything its worth. He’s going to hook Green Lantern up with old flight buddies and immerse him in the pilot’s ethos and culture. He’s going to make him a hotshot who’s got a plan even when he’s redlining. He’s gonna make him a ladies’ man.
Aided and abetted by Carlos Pacheco, the next-gen answer to John Byrne or Alan Davis, he sells it. It always helps to work with the best, and Pacheco is a consummate superhero artist.
Here and there I did hit a few speedbumps on the tarmac: Johns likes to use overlapping narrative captions and periodically I lost track of the voices, usually in the middle of a frenzied action sequence. I think they could stand to be toned down a bit. I was also disappointed that we never quite knew the capabilities of the Manhunters. Obviously they’re strong, obviously they can fly, and Manhunter 2.0 has a freaky little hand weapon that seems to do…stuff…but even amidst the issue’s fast pacing, learning a few specifics would’ve been nice. Lastly, I wondered about Green Lantern’s interaction with a hardass general who relents surprisingly easily. Later in the issue we get a sense for why the general did what he did, but the fact that he took crap from his own subordinates in the earlier scene still makes it hard to buy.
These are little moments lost in the immediacy that drives the issue, so I’m not putting ‘em on the permanent record. My gut reaction is that this is how you do an action issue right, how you generate reader suspense even when they’re fully aware the hero ain’t gonna get croaked, and how you make danger exhilarating rather than wearying. There’s even a subplot involving Hal’s brother that comes to fruition, and if it’s a little heavy-handed, it still feels right, feels like the culmination of the themes building since GREEN LANTERN: REBIRTH. All this, and the issue’s got what has to be the coolest, most defining line Hal Jordan’s ever uttered, appropriately occurring when he seems screwed six ways to Sunday. I won’t spoil. You need the context.
If Hal, Johns, Pacheco, et al. can just maintain this light in the face of DC’s coming darkness and infinite crossovers, they’ve put together the kind of book that I can even imagine sticking with. (Note: for us disgruntled types, that’s the equivalent of a ringing endorsement.)
ROCKETO # 1
Written by: Frank Espinosa and Marie Taylor
Illustrated by: Frank Espinosa
Published by: Speakeasy Comics
Reviewed by: superhero
Man oh man, I was waiting for this comic with bated breath.
Every preview of the artwork I had seen on all the internet comic news outlets had piqued my curiosity from the moment I laid eyes on Espinosa’s artwork. The preview pages I saw promised something really engaging and different. It looked like ROCKETO was going to be a book that captured my imagination and thrilled me with a bold new innovative style. The images seemed to
jump off the screen and promise an adventure in the vein of Flash Gordon or John Carter of Mars. I was psyched for this book in a big way.
Unfortunately, it only halfway delivered for me.
The main draw of this book is the artwork. Honestly, it’s been a long time since I’ve laid eyes on a comic book whose artwork made me stop and go, “whoa”, and ROCKETO made me do just that. The thing that’s so astounding about the images that are placed on the page is that Espinosa is embracing a style that uses bold brushwork. His work adds a vibrance and energy to ROCKETO that few comic books have. Every page is an astonishing new work of art. Mr. Espinosa makes his images bounce across the page with the use of his brush and each page is like a brand new painting in and of its own. In all seriousness, each panel of this book should be hanging in a gallery. Espinosa’s work is that good and that fascinating. It’s not your typical comic book art and I’m thankful for it. This book is full of comic ART. It’s so good, so innovative, that I can honestly see a narrower minded comic fan being turned off by it. Espinosa is an artistic talent to watch and I can’t wait to see more artwork by him. My only complaint about the book’s art would be the muted palette used in the coloring. While the pages look beautiful I would have expected a fantasy series like this to possibly use some brighter primary colors to add impact to the story. As of right now, Mr. Espinosa seems to be just using a muted palette of pastel shades. While the pages look beautiful I personally would have liked to see some brighter shades of red or blue to help make some of the action pop off the page. But like I said, the artwork is beautiful to behold and my criticism is a nitpick at best. ROCKETO really is a gorgeous book to behold.
Now if only the story were as engaging.
I know, I know…writing this next part is killing me because I SO wanted to like this book, especially when I saw the art. I just wanted to love it. So it really breaks my heart when I say that the story itself fell flat on its beautiful face for me. ROCKETO seems to not know what story it wants to tell. It bounces around from telling us about Rocketo’s family to a story about his father to the history of the world they live on (The planet Lucerne.) to the tragic story of his parent’s demise. The narrative is all over the place. Honestly, it seemed to me like someone snuck
into the pre-press files right before this book was going to be printed and shuffled all the pages around. While the story makes sense, there’s no flow to the events that occur. It just jumps from one plot to the next without any real reason. The real thing that killed me was when the story gets into the history of Lucerne and how things came to be. I was so interested in that particular piece of the story that when Espinosa bounces us back to the present to see what Rocketo was up to I couldn’t have cared less! I wanted to know about the main character, an adventurer by the name of Olympius Kinkaid, of the history of Lucerne! Who cares about silly lil’ Rocketo playing with his
parents? I want to read about the adventures of Olympius Kinkaid!
The problem is most of ROCKETO’S story takes place when he’s a boy and he’s dealing with his parents. The real engaging part of the book is when Rocketo reads about the history of his world, the disasters that befell it and the races of survivors that rose to conquer and explore the world afterwards. The book is supposed to be about Rocketo but I don’t want to read about Rocketo! Espinosa has made the fatal mistake of making his back story more interesting than the story
he’s trying to tell. Not to mention that he uses a flashback within a flashback to tell it…and that’s
just bad form.
ROCKETO could have been a really stellar book if the story had just been thought out more. If the writers wanted to tell us about the world Rocketo inhabits then they should have just told that story and led us into Rocketo’s life later on. Instead they jerk the reader between plots so as to make the book a bit of a frustrating read.
What makes ROCKETO worth buying is the artwork. If you can look past a bit of sub-par storytelling (And I know a lot of you can…I mean the X-Men comics are selling like hotcakes, right?) ROCKETO is more than worth a look. The artwork alone is worth the price of
admission. Still, if the storytelling doesn’t get better even Espinosa’s stunning artwork may not even be able to keep my buying. But as of right now he’s definitely got me at least wanting to check out the next issue and that, in and of itself, is an accomplishment. What will really surprise me is if he’s able to keep me coming back for issues three and onward. Right now it’s only getting one more chance but who knows? That may enough to turn this comic fan around.
HERO@LARGE #1
Writer: Erick Hogan
Penciler: Jeremy Treece
Publisher: Speakeasy Comics
Reviewed by Humphrey Lee
Okay, we all know how crucial the first issue of a brand-spanking-new comic is. Especially in today’s market. Anymore, this is the make it or break it issue, as with the trade-driven market we're facing this is the only actual issue someone might actually buy of the comic. So you need to hook them baby, oh yea. You need your interesting lead character, you need your riveting storyline, you need your interesting cast of supporting characters, and a cover, yea, you need that cover to do some "heavy lifting" so to speak. So how does HERO@LARGE (man, if there was ever a comic book title to screw with your hyperlinking) fare? Well, I'm going to be getting the second issue, I'll give it that.
The premise of this book is quite simple, Alpha Major, at one time the city of Megalotropolis' biggest hero, is washed up. He seems to be a bit of your traditional mask and cape kinda hero, but that doesn't cut it anymore The people want more modern, and more importantly, more marketable. And Alpha Major definitely isn't that anymore. He's lost his touch with the people, he's lost his place in the city's resident supergroup, and he's lost his motivation to do what he used to love.
The story itself isn't very unique, but at the same time it's not something you see all that often. Right off the bat, though, it does succeed in bringing out some pretty interesting side-characters, but as for the lead, well, the jury is still out on him. Like the main character, I think the book is trying to find direction, and it reflects on both of those aspects. Alpha Major is shown, at first, as your typical loud and boisterous superhero. A little of your "All American Boyscout" type, which is just, well, annoying. But after his fall from grace we see the character’s potential. As he pulls himself up from living in his own filth to once again try to reclaim his title as the city's greatest and most popular superhero, we see some determination, and some grit, but the light-heartedness I would like to hope you want in your superheroes.
And with all of that said I should point out that there are some good funny bits in this book. It wasn't as much on laughs as I expected it was going to be when I first read about it, and especially when I saw that great cover, but it does have a couple, especially a nice little sight gag at the end to let you know where the book stands. And while a lot of people are probably going to take issue with the art, I have to say I like it. It's definitely not typical, there are a lot of jagged edges on the characters, but I do think it matches the tone of the book perfectly. And really, the body renderings of the characters aren't that "odd" but there are some random facial expressions that are just way out there. But again, it does seem to fit with what the book is going for.
So, overall I have to say that this first issue did its job for the most part. You get a lead that is somewhat interesting, but has some potential to be very much more so depending on how the direction of the book goes. You've got a nice start on supporting characters, though the scenery is a bit bland. If the city is so important to Alpha Major, then we definitely need to be seeing more of it. There's a little bit of genuine emotion in here and some nice gags as well. It's enough to get me to buy the second issue, and enough for me to recommend this to anyone out there looking for something different. Hopefully the creative team can pick up the strong parts of the book and run with them.
MASKED COMMANDER
Written By: John May
Pencilled by: Chris Samnee
Inked by: Andy Pursley
Published by: Meridian Arts
Reviewed by: superhero
I just love whacked out ideas for comic books.
Sometimes the weirder the idea is the more I cater to it.
What’s the big idea of MASKED COMMANDER that had me grinning from ear to ear as I decided to check this book out?
MASKED COMMANDER tells the story of an imaginary Presidential candidate who once he reaches the highest office in the land realizes that his ability to get things done within the system is almost impossible. He’s constantly second guessed by the media and other politicians. His quest to fulfill his idealistic goals often fall short as he inevitably comes up against all forms of opposition. Eventually he begins to feel impotent and trapped in the office he struggled so hard to get to. He discovers that, having become President, he is actually less able to affect change than he was able to as just a Presidential candidate.
So being faced with the realization that other people won’t just follow him blindly down the path that he sets for the country what does he decide to do? He decides to put on a costume and go on covert missions that the U.S. government or military wouldn’t even touch. He enlists his secret service agents to act along with him and he puts on a cape, a mask, and what looks like a modified Bucky (Captain America’s old sidekick) costume and go take care of the business that won’t get done if just left up to the policy makers in Washington D.C.
See what I mean? This idea is just ridiculous but it’s a great idea. Even though the idea is great the idea itself actually leads to some of the problems I actually had with the book.
As I read the book all these questions popped into my head about what the protagonist was doing that aren’t addressed in the book. Maybe I’m taking this book a little too seriously, I mean some of it is presented in a lighthearted tone, but there were some things about this book that left me really questioning a lot of what the book was actually trying focus on. Obviously this book seems to be trying to make some kind of statement as to how different elements of our society are tying down the political process and it makes that point quite clearly within the framework of a typical comic book adventure story. This is something that MASKED COMMANDER succeeds at quite admirably. My problem with it is that it just doesn’t go deep enough into the issues that it keeps raising. It seems to ignore so many aspects of the story framework that it just left me wondering not only about the plausibility of the premise but about the actual motivations of the character as well.
Now I realize that the actual idea itself is completely implausible. The problem is that the story as presented wasn’t able to suspend my disbelief completely. Usually with wacky ideas the tone is fast and loose which will let you just go with the story despite the completely silly premise you’re reading about. The thing is the tone of MASKED COMMANDER’s origin story comes across as so serious it becomes hard to ignore the larger questions that it raises. Like is this guy a Democrat or a Republican? What are his policies? What does he believe in besides the ambiguous ideals he talks about in the book? What exactly is he fighting for? Not to mention it never addresses the age-old comic book question: is putting on a mask and hitting people the best way to solve a society’s ills? And how about the fact that putting on a mask and acting like a vigilante is actually a crime? Or how about the possibility that a national leader who takes the law into his own hands could be seen as fascist?
These are just some of the problems I had with the story as presented. But as I said before, I could be taking the book a little too seriously. The thing is, the issues that drive the Commander to action are pretty serious in and of themselves so shouldn’t the creators address the other inevitable issues that a President who fights terrorism on his own would bring up? Maybe I should have just let go a bit more while reading this book. I mean we are talking about a comic where the main hero rides around in a plane called Air Fort One. Maybe I shouldn’t try to read politics into a book that looks like it just wants to be a simple super hero story but the undertones of the origin seem political so it was just something I couldn’t ignore.
The other thing that slightly bothered me about the book was the storytelling method used in telling the Commander’s origin. The story is presented in flashback fashion. My problem with this is that I’m being told the story instead of seeing it unfold as it happens. I personally would have preferred his origin story playing out so I could get to know the character and his circumstances a bit more. As it’s presented the Commander’s origin reads like a storybook. Like we’re being told about the Commander instead of actually experiencing what he’s going through. Obviously the storytellers here had limited space to fit the origin in but I actually think the Commander could have been a more compelling character if we’d actually gotten to know him instead of being told about him.
The art in MASKED COMMANDER is very good and has an old school flair to it. The line work is simple but elegant and the coloring actually adds to the impact of the storytelling. Samnee’s pencils and Pursley’s inks combine to give the story a flavor of comic books from days gone by while Thompson Knox’s colors give a punch to the page without actually distracting from the artwork itself. All in all the art team is extremely capable and added to the enjoyment I had while story.
Despite my criticisms I did actually enjoy the book. Right now it seems like MASKED COMMANDER could really develop into something interesting and fun. My problems with it stem from the fact that it may not have the courage of its convictions. If you’re going to bring up political issues in a book then you should address them. I understand that, for the most part, the creators are developing a straight up adventure story but if it’s going to star The President of the United States of America then you’d better be prepared to address some of the larger issues that go along with it. I mean, EX-MACHINA does and it only stars the Mayor of New York City.
I also have to address something else before I finish this review. The book only seems to be available through its website www.maskedcommander.com. The problem is that the book itself costs $3.50 and once you pay for shipping via their Amazon shop you’ll be paying over six dollars for a single comic that’s no longer than your average Spider-Man comic! While that may not be a huge deal for buyers looking for something different in their comic reading most comic buyers will probably balk at the price. I, personally, like supporting independent books that look interesting to me so I didn’t really have a problem with it but I guess you’ll have to decide for yourself whether a comic book you’ve probably never really heard of is worth six bucks.
Remember, if you have an Indie book you’d like one of the @$$holes to take a look at, click on your favorite reviewer’s link and drop us an email.
Remember, if you have an Indie book you’d like one of the @$$holes to take a look at, click on your favorite reviewer’s link and drop us an email.
LIVEWIRES #6 (of 6)
I think what I’ve liked best about this series is that, amidst all the action and robot carnage, it’s had 101 bitchin’ ideas I’ve had to work to wrap my puny little mind around. I actually think Adam Warren is rockin’ the sci-fi angle harder than Warren Ellis does in his superhero work. Ellis doles out his tech in bite-sized nuggets, but Adam Warren just immerses the reader in it, daring him to keep up as classic Marvel action gets well and truly weird. For the fiery finale, the last remaining Livewire, Stem Cell, is up against an entire S.H.I.E.L.D. helicarrier packed to the gills with networked, Nick Fury Life Model Decoys (if you have to ask, you’ll never understand). It’s ridiculously weird, it’s weirdly cool, and the book’s still got some tricks up its sleeves. Namely, Stem Cell’s realization that she needs to remove a programming block to have even a chance of survival. And no, she’s not trying to find her humanity or some shit – she’s trying to remove it. Remove it so she can cut loose hardcore. It’s the book’s core theme if it’s got one: the anti-Pinocchio, anti-Data, anti-“being more human will solve everything!” Consider LIVEWIRES Marvel’s best sleeper title of the year, and either track down the back issues or keep your eyes peeled for the pending digest collection. - Dave
DETECTIVE COMICS #810
Okay, when I’m wrong, I’ll say it and this time I’m glad I was. In last week’s column, I mistakenly thought the mysterious burned man trouncing through this useless “War Crimes” crossover was Azrael, back from wherever the hell his shitty old series faded him off to. Turns out I was wrong, thank god. But even that good news doesn’t save this story, which again seems unnecessarily in the crossover-ripe state in which DC Comics are in these days. There is a nice little moment with the Joker towards the end that’ll keep me around for at least another issue, though. - Bug
THE AUTHORITY: REVOLUTION #11
As we wind down this AUTHORITY maxi-series with this penultimate issue, we are treated to a bit of an action bonanza. Last issue was a nice mix of exposition and action as once-thought long dead nemesis Henry Bendix made his presence known to our merry band of JLA analogs, and brought along a little help to try and muscle down our protagonists. But with this issue, we're treated to what the AUTHORITY do best, balls to the wall bloodshed and action. Overall, it's a bit like the JLA arc TOWER OF BABEL as we see the Midnighter *cough Batman cough* being manipulated by Bendix and going after his teammates with the
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I just want to slap Namor like the bitch he is.
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for showing me the light that is Bone. I got the huge one volume edition for a bargain and love it. awesome stuff. Keep up the recommendations.
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....is cool as fuck.
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I know wholeheartedly agree with the Will Farrell-as-Dr. Strange thing. With Vince Vaughn as Namor, Luke Wilson as Silver Surf-Dude and, uhm, Eric Bana as Hulk. Whta? The man's a comedian in Australia, doesn't that count? Wasn't his Hulk unintentionally fucking hilarious?
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Wally West's dad Rudy was not revealed to be an "alien robot," Vroom -- Rudy was WORKING for the Manhunters. The guy was a total douchebag, sure, but at least he was a human douchebag. It's too bad that no writer has touched on Wally's effed-up parents since Bill Loebs, because Mary West could be the next Emily Gilmore if written properly.
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Aug 24, 2005 12:34:38 PM CDT
High-School (or Middle for me) Fantasy Novels turned into comics
by shigeru
Gonna have to pick up that Dragonlance book... I remember those days... Forgotten Realms vs. Dragonlance. Fond memories. But Dave you gave a fairly poor review of the HOMELAND comic a little bit ago... the Drizzt books for me hold just as much nostalgia-power as the Dragonlance ones. I for one hope that they keep going with both series... remember Kitiara vs. Sturm on the castle parapet?? Fucking epic!
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Where's the casting couch Bug? **** Glad you liked GL #3 Dave. About time your jaded superhero senses were satisfied. And that "oh shit" moment was awesome. I like Pacheco more than i've ever liked Davis right now, and he's stomping Byrne right now too imho. Good comparisons though Dave.
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These things take a bit of time. Back to GL#3. I loved the part of that issue when the Manhunter is faced with making the decision whether to kill Hal or destroy the other Manhunter. It really was an intensely hectic scene. Johns really can write some intense action.
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so, Sue Dibny is responsible for HoM? Damn her! Did you enjoy lunch? I'm starving.
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It was yummy and today is new comic day and there are about 10 books I'm going to pick up (in addition to getting Nintendogs) so I am having a great day.
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and that was another good moment in GL #3. My favorite (even over the "oh shit" moment) was when Hal lit the way next to the family who looked worried to be driving through the dark Coast City. That to me, is what superheroes are supposed to be. Like I said last week to the fellow All Week Cog Smooches, I think this issue is a good superhero comic that isn't as "dark" or complicated with things right now as other books are in both DC and Marvel. I mean, Dave even likes it!
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The hell? (I know, I'm beating a dead horse, but it was a big fucker!) They don't allow dogs where you live? I'm excited to get the new books too. Probably tomorrow it looks like for me. And I'm still searching for the name of that theater in Maine. So far I know it's located in Northern Maine in the biggest resort town there is apparently.
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Correct me if I'm wrong (I don't have the book in front of me right now), but wasn't that family coming into town Hal's brother and his family? I thought it was. Either way, I'm looking forward to Johns' revamps of Hal's rogues gallery. They may not be as strong as Batman's or Superman's, but just look what he's done with Flash's Rogues. I mean, in the next few months, we've got Hal fighting the Shark, Hector HAmmond, and Black Hand. Could the Tattooed Man be far behind? Tattooed Man ranks right up there with Superman's Terra Man as one of the weirdest super villain designs. I mean, he wore a Catain and Teneil like sailor's cap, fer crying out loud.
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Probably haven't been there, then. That's what we like to call "Deliverance-ville" up there. There is one with bucket seats that serves food in Portland called Chunkys. No they don't allow dogs at the place I rent, plus we work full time so can't really take care of one... and it's for my fiancee (and me). And it looks awesome. Ha we're already terribly off-topic... sorry guys.
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it was Hal's brothers family. But I thought they still looked a litlle nervous coming back in to town, but what a great way to be welcomed back. Good moment regardless. I'm excited about the GL's rogue gallery too.
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Wow. Thurston Howell the 3rd battles Hal Jordan. Lovey, where's the umbrellas for my Pina Colada? http://image.milehighcomics.com/istore/images/fullsize/37137612952.23.GIF
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http://image.milehighcomics.com/istore/images/fullsize/01062288700.469.GIF
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but FUNNY!!!
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ewww. Ever seen this? http://www.nationallampoon.com/supermanisadick/
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I also find it hilarious that this is a cover to "ACTION" Comics. heh.
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Can you imagine any other comic artist pulling off an image like that? Seriously...riding Superman like a bronc and making it look interesting...if not totally gay. My hat's off to Giordano...at least that's who it looks like drew it...
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Aug 24, 2005 1:39:19 PM CDT
Holy shit Shigeru!!! "List of more pratical uses Superboy can ma
by the heathen
1) Betting on the outcomes of sporting events.
2) Forseeing natural diasters and catastrophhe.
3) Letting Bruce Wayne know that his parents are going to be gunned down in front of his very eyes in a filthy alley, you dick." Classic. My other fave is the one of Jimmy being adopted. -
How far gone do you have to be to read a comic book written by Rob Zombie? I hope the industry gets beyond this "big name writer" syndrome. I think this week is even slower.
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I loved the pre-fight comments by the enemies in BOP this week.
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http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/images/comic_tot2.gif
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http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/images/comic_tot14.gif
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With varying results. He's teamed up with Steven Niles a few times, once with the groaner THE NAIL miniseries and once with the surprisingly entertaining BIGFOOT mini drawn by Richard Corben. He also has a book called SPOOKSHOW or something like that, but I haven't read it. I've seen "big name" writers do much worse. Zombie seems to have some real talent under all of those dreadlocks.
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I don't want to be a bitter old jerk, but I say don't get your hopes up on the Devil's Rejects comic book based on this review. The art is pretty good, there's an amusing moment or two, but it's instantly forgettable. I think part of the problem (like many movie based comics) is that the actors in the movie are so great that I would rather watch them (especially Sid Haig) than look at a cartoon interpretation of the characters. But also, the stories are pretty basic and while it might be shocking or horrifying to see Otis and Baby disemboweling people in a movie, it is only mildly amusing in comic book form. Another complaint: no Tiny. I'm not saying it's bad, I'm just saying that review is way over the top. Lower expectations and you might be fine.
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Maybe he's certifiable a few other ways too, but I heard he has an insanely high IQ. And the covers to ROB ZOMBIE SPOOK SHOW INTERNATIONAL freak me out because they feel like a carnival banner. I haven't read anything of his though.*** http://tinyurl.com/b7oam *** and check out Sid Haig *** http://tinyurl.com/bhpab ***
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Aug 24, 2005 3:07:31 PM CDT
Zombie might be a certifiable genius, but the Heathen certainly
by kung fu hustler
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I agree the film is much more graphic than the comic, but it made me feel kind of queasy when Zombie went that one step further in the Carnival ride scene in the comic where Otis and Baby start playing with the body parts. Plus the Freudian stuff really made it seem like these filthy characters had real psychoses. The Freudian stuff alone in that issue was enough to respect Zombie for taking things to a more sophisticated level.
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What the fuck?! or if you didn't understand that, how about Bendis speak, "Da fug?!" Don't you have homework to do or something?
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Aug 24, 2005 3:19:17 PM CDT
Yeah that Charlie guy made a little cameo in Ultimate Spider-Man
by ribbons
I don't know whether or not your question was rhetorical, Vroom, but I'm also 99% sure that was him.
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It's one of those crappy weeks where none of the books reviewed interest me. Still that's not the @$$holes' fault. Good job on the Defenders review Prof. When the interview started i thought "Well this is gonna be a disaster", but no you pulled it off. And what's wrong with Kung Fu Hustler? Also Maddox fucking rules!!!
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30 Helens agree: "Image Comics need to get Todd Nauck to make more Wildguard comics!"
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On one hand there's Gail Simone *** http://tinyurl.com/bl56v ***, on the other badly rendered hand is Rob Liefeld? Oh decisions!
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I became a Liefeld fan. I mean where else are you gonna find that disturbingly awesome level of crappyness today? Oh and Simone's looking quite heavy in that picture, i thought the gal was supposed to be good looking. I hate it when that happens.
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sos the superman's a dick thing. great job guys! i agree with vale tho that not too much that was reviewed was of interest to me but again not the @$$holes fault.next week looks good with young avengers and astonishing x-men.and what did u mean kung fu hustler by that jab at heathen? Did you want to tame him like a wild bronc?
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Why, because I'm liking Gail Simone...She's from the same cut as John Ostrander, Geoff Johns and Mark Waid. She can do solid stories with great characterization...she nodds to continuity without being hampered by it. Check out how Batman financed the whole thing...She had him do it in such a way that highlights their estrangement while showing the compassion Bats actually has for his fellow warriors.
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Only the die hard Hal haters could say he is boring after this issue. Hal lighting the way for his brother's family was a nice touch. I am glad the previous talk backers thought as much of that scene as I do. Hal is in good hands with Geoff Johns and that scene proves it to me. I like Cowgirl but I hope Hal doesn't settle down so soon. There are many fish in the celestial seas. I want Hal to do the Captain Kirk thing and make monkey love to beautiful alien women. Does anyone have any ideas about that last page? or is discussing it considered a spoiler?
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Aug 24, 2005 6:44:46 PM CDT
Kitty and Peter and Statutory Rape! (Hey wasen't their a fan
by rickslamu2
First off Although their are tons of hot X-Women, Kitty in the regular Marvel U. has always been one of my favorite characters. I said it once here at AICN, I
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play ball!
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i used to live in new mexico and the age of consent over there is 16 and thats a term id hear expressed a lot over there.
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I have no idea what the age of consent is here in Colombia, i guess it's 18, but no one ever makes a fuss about that.
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Good to know reasonable people w/ intelligent things to say got my back. I had no idea why Kung Fu said that. I think I was the victim of a young teen type-bye! Straight up Boyz In Da Hood style! *** I like grass on the field, but only if it's freshly cut ; ) And don't even make me think of the young Colombian girls Vale. Shakira is Colombian right? I like the way she looks - a lot. *** Hey astronato, I saw you post something over at newsarama after your's and superhero's back and forth last week and I was like, "hey I know you!" You picked up any other titles than what you had listed?
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http://tinyurl.com/b9c37 *** And Ms. Simone writes so good I imagined her to be more attractive too (isn't that the case w/ everybody?), but I will say that I will get Teen Titans because her writing is damn fine - even w/ Liefeld drawing.
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...is the one where the kid's lying on the bed crying and Superman is walking into the room undressing. THAT'S disturbing.
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sounds like typical teen bullshit heathen. that did completely come out of nowhere.ive always thought gail simone was not too bad looking.oh man shakira! i love her! i was watching more firefly last night and really i think i heart morena baccarin more than any other female right now.also that image of cap will forever be ingrained in my mind!make it go away! make it stop! damn u liefeld!!!
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The balder the better, that's my motto. Or, you know, it would be if i had a motto. And there's something to be said about young colombian girls...a lot of them are good looking. Shakira is indeed colombian, but i don't find her all that beautiful, tell you the truth. Classic Barranquillera. Check these out: http://tinyurl.com/78nx4 http://tinyurl.com/anm8b http://tinyurl.com/blrvg http://tinyurl.com/8u4xx http://tinyurl.com/9z32a http://tinyurl.com/95aqo That's the REAL colombian gold.
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that if someone is going to link that cap pic they should headline it with a disclaimer like a spoiler warning or something that says "WARNING INCREDIBLY BAD ART THROUGH THIS LINK"
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wow thanks vale! my fave is the black haired girl but theyre all very hot. on a related note,wheres the porn?!!
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Is it just me, or does your "indie" jones mostly cover superhero/sci-fi books that aren't published by the big two? Maybe I'm remembering wrong. I guess I'm the only one who doesn't care about new superheroes outside the Big 2. I really don't care if Invincible or whatever is great. I wish new writers would use their imagination, and not write an "original creation" that is essentially Spidey or the X-Men wrapped up in a different costume, with one twist that makes it "original".
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I'm originally from up around them pahts.
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da fug am i smoking?i completely meant someone else! i dont know why i thought u guys were talking about the wife on everybody loves raymond. sorry my bad! its been a long day!
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Her name's Carolina Cruz. She's VERY hot, and also VERY...um...not bright. I guess that's part of her charm.
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It would be nice if the creative team on the reviewed book were listed before each review and quick shot, or whatever you call that. Also, stop trying to write funny. It's like when George Lucas tries to write funny.
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Let's see...
I've reviewed G.I. SPY, COMICULTURE ANTHOLOGY, KILLER STUNTS, INC., MIDDLEMAN, TRAILER PARK OF TERROR, and THE GOON.
I wouldn't really call any of those superhero books and MIDDLEMAN is the only one that could fall into a sci-fi category -- even then, it's more of a parody of a sci-fi genre.
Don't paint with such a broad brush. You'll miss all the details. -
Are we really supposed to take criticism seriously from someone calling himself "3 Bag Enema"?
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And I'm not sure what the paintbrush metaphor was supposed to mean.
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I don't even know what that Defenders review was all about. The only two reviews I was interested in was Birds of Prey and Authority, and when the reviewer points out that Midnighter is based on Batman...well, most of us here have read a comic or two in our lives, but thanks for pointing out the obvious.
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It would be nice if the creative team on the reviewed book were listed before every quick shot.
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I really didn't find that issue funny at all. I was really looking forward to this series, but now I don't think I'll get issue #3. I was just hoping something...more. No, less. In this case, less would be more. In other words, they need to know when they've taken a joke too far. *** I liked the Defenders review though. It was better than Dave's Dragonlance and G.I.Joe reviews. I mean, he has to be making this shit up, right? I mean, I love my childhood as much as anyone, but there can't *really* be a market for a Snake-Eyes origin story and a new Dragonlance tale featuring the old Weis/Hickman characters in 2005, can there? Seriously?
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that issue sure kicked some ass...too bad the tv show sucked.
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Actually Sideshow, I'm pretty sure that it's NOT a *new* Dragonlance tale, but a retelling of the original story. I remember being fairly *meh* about the books when they first came out, though I still bought and read them all. Upon attempting to re-read them recently, the *meh* turned into a firm *blah*. I couldn't get through the first one. Damn this getting old and jaded....
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You know... that WB show that features than young college aged woman who appeared in the teen horror flick sometime within the last nine years. Remember her?
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I took a flier on this title partly on the buzz created by this column and elswehere on the web. Picked up issue 84 which was the only issue available at the only comic book shop on the island. The story was interesting even though I probably missed some of the jist of it due to being a BOP virgin. The art was first rate. I have never come across this penciller before but I'll look out for him in the future. The colouring was lovely . Funny since I rarely notice that unless its quite bad.
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I thought that bloody lame dialogue exchange shtick had gone out ages ago and yet, bang, here it is again with Defenders and just as crap....Just grow up and get back to showing some maturity and enthusiasm about the comics you're reviewing. It's as if you just can't be bothered.
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Don't do it, people! Don't buy that frackin issue of Teen Titans! I don't care if the bastard love child cloned from the DNA of William Shakespeare and Yeats wrote the damn thing, it's still filled to the brim with shite. The cover even says something akin to "You know you want to!", implying that many will buy it out of sheer morbid curiosity or even for the kitsch factor of owning something so BAD. I don't care if I'm listening to fugging Beethoven if someone is repeatedly punching me in the penis while I'm doing it. (I hope that made sense)
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I loved the books in Jr. High. They'd never win any prose awards, but those suckers were page-turners for sure. A couple years back I tried my hand at the Drzzzt books, which are supposedly well-loved by fantasy fans, and I couldn't believe how bad they were, by any standard.
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I think one thing comics shouldn't be is boring. Rob may draw some spectacularly bad books, but he's never boring for a second. Compare that to roughly 90% of the books on the shelves that are dull and provoke zero reaction in the reader.
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I am still truamatized from reading Youngblood all those years ago. The only good part of that since I worked in a comic book store at the time I didn't actually buy that issue. Ever since then I have refused to read anything he's involved with.
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I read the Drizzt and the Dragonlance books at the same time in Jr High and I slightly preferred the Drizzt ones... but if I first read them past the age of, say, 18? I dunno how I would feel. Nostalgia is a powerful drug. As for Liefeld: I would agree that horrendous failures are almost always more interesting than middle of the road mediocrity. But I still don't support, encourage or "love" either choices. Cutting off your fingers isn't boring but it still sucks compared to playing a concerta on the piano with them (okay I gotta stop with these metaphors). I am of the opinion that Rob Liefeld transcends opinion.
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It was friggin' awesome. Millar Rules. Takes a 3000 year old plot device and hits you with it when you're not looking.
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I would expect it to be reviewed in next week's column. A fantastic issue with a great solemn closing. Is that Millar's last issue?
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I went through the same exercise of trying to re-read the Drizzt books as I did the Dragonlance books recently. I can't tell if the reason it all seemed so derivative was because it was, or because there have been piles of spectacularly bad Fantasy fiction churned out since I first read them. (Most of which I also read.) Ye gods but I read (and liked) some craptastic stuff in those days... I guess tastes mature, and all that. Of course, Liefeld has made my eyes bleed from the first time I saw Cable drawn with 4 foot broad shoulders and 2 inch wide ankles. (What is it with that man and feet....) And I'll never forgive him for the proliferation of thigh and bicep utility belts that seemed to pop up on every damn character after that.
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Surely...SURELY...no one could be surprised at a high level of nostalgia in this industry - it's pretty much its life's blood! I mean, Dragonlance and GI JOE are only twenty, twenty-five years old. How old are industry pillars Batman, Superman, and the X-Men, eh?
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...if ya know what I mean.
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What was the editorial edict again? Every series had to have at least one long-running character turn out to be a covert Manhunter? I'm trying to remember, was that role somehow shoehorned onto Lana Lang in SUPERMAN? I know she had *some* tie to it all. And over in WONDER WOMAN, the Manhunter was...goat god Pan! And this is why crossovers stink. Except NO MAN'S LAND, which only stunk at the end.
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i thought it was just a pic you got off the net! wow when can i come visit you in colombia? when i looked at liefeld art now i cant believe that i used to wait in anticipation of the next issue of x-force. i guess tastes do mature because now i cant look at the stuff without feeling queesy.never read any of the dragonlance fantasy things thats not really my bag.ive been meaning to get into wolverine because i like millar. its good to hear its a good read.ill be sure and get a few issues when i hit the store tonight. hey dave when i give bone it truly is a gift
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Sorry about not warning you of the Liefeld art Kal-El. It defintitely should come w/ a warning. And I love Shakira and Morena Baccarin too. My head will explode even thinking of the two of them
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I didn't see this book on the stands. I hope to buy it soon.
For those who didn't ever go to the official website, Otis Driftwood and Baby are not actually siblings. They (yes, I know they're fictional, asshole) have no blood relationship at all. Baby is Captain Spaulding's daughter from Mama Firefly, while Otis is a friend of his met in prison. There's page after page of background information on most of the characters available. It is all interesting. -
He's a unifying force. He's one of the elements makes lone fringedwellers into a culture. You can all agree that you hate him, that you hate his work. It's very important to the fanboy culture to have this guy to talk about week after week, even though he has not had any kind of impact on the artform in about 14 years. Myself included, whatever bullshit we talk here, we're not the cool kids and never were. Therefore, fanboys need to agree among themselves on certain keypoints. Otherwise, it's too much like being in middle school. That's why comic book critics get more shit that other kinds of critics. Unless it's Liefeld, Zimmerman or Chuck Austen, nobody really thinks too critically about what they're reading and they're threatened by the very idea. I was at this other board once (cheating on the @$$holes) and I said something positive about Liefeld. Somebody posts saying, "Buzz, if you're going to hang around these boards, you'd better know we don't like Liefeld here." Calm, rational, easy going guy that I am, I thoughtfully responded, "What are we here, fucking surfers? Because if we are, this is my beach and those are my breaks and you don't fucking ride until it's clear with me and you never, ever, ever drop in on Buzz Maverik!" I'd be willing to be bet that many writers of anti-Liefeld posts have never even held one of his comics in their hands. Very few of us have anything intelligent to say about the art. Even when we write reviews. When you're writing about writing, you're talking in the same terms and language. With the art, it's a visceral thing. It either works on you or it doesn't. But when it comes to Liefeld, suddenly everyone is a fucking art expert and can analyze anatomy, composition, whatever. Here's the part of the post everyone will ignore: I'm not a huge Liefeld fan. But he's not the Great Satan...or maybe he is because fanboys need Liefeld the way that fundamentalist Christians need Satan. Ever been around any fundamentalists? They love Jesus, but, man, when they talk about Satan, that's when they really get excited. I told a bunch of fundamentalists once that I believed in Jesus, even though I am of predominantly the same ethnicity as Jesus, but I didn't believe in Satan. I thought they were going to tear me apart. Last time I was that scared was the day DARK KNIGHT STRIKES BACK hit the comic shop and I went in and asked if this was the one where he fights the Penguin. I've met Liefeld a few times when he was comic book store clerk in Orange County. Nice guy. Drew all the time. You had to kind of say, "Rob! I'm ready to pay for my fucking comics now!" It's hard to have an unbiased opinion about his art, simply because of the old report card adage: "He never lived up to his potential." Like that stupid song from ROCKY XVII, EYE O' THE TIGER said, he "...traded his passion for glory..." He got too big too fast, never learned storytelling or motion, never transcended X-Clones. At his best, when his stuff was working, it had that otherworldly passion of pure imagination, which because comics are pop culture, is better than greatness. Jack Kiry, a truly great artist and billion times Rob's superior (so put your pants back on and untie that noose) had the same quality, coupled with the genuine work ethnic of a Depression kid who killed Nazis (I was gonna reply to the last talkback about the artists who could take four years and the Eur-op-eans. Before America became pussified, real men artists like Jack could produce 12-14 pages of beauty a day and guys like Stan could write 35 fucking comic books a month! I myself used to be able to write an entire screenplay in a weekend back in the Crystal Meth days). But Liefeld got too much power, got his own company, wouldn't admit that he couldn't write, wouldn't stay at his goddam drawing board, wouldn't admit he needed a strong editor to force him to work -- that was the end of editorial, that's why writers like Bendis are king and no editor will say "Tighten this shit up" and the fans don't know the difference. Liefeld's art ruled American mainstream comics for a brief period, when it really wasn't mainstream art. It's sad, because he would have found his niche if he hadn't become the big Kahuna at the end of the 1980s. ... Also, Gail Simone's looks. I don't know you guys who are talking about Gail's looks, but I'll bet she's a better looking chick than you are a dude. You're reading comics. What the fuck are you expecting? Whenever a woman does anything in comics, the first question nerdboys ask is, "What's she look like?" When they ask me, I always say, "Yeah, like you'd have a shot either way" and "You read 100 BULLETS, do you give a shit what Brian Azzarello looks like?"
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Aug 25, 2005 12:33:13 PM CDT
Lana Lang was brainwashed by the Manhunters to follow Clark arou
by superhero
Unfortunately, it ruined her character forever. Instead of just being devastated by Clark jilting her and leaving Smallville and pining for him and following him around of her own volition once Superman showed up. I always thought it was interesting that she just sort of dropped out of society once Clark revealed his true nature to her when they were teens. When Superman showed up she just ended up following him around unable to approach him. I always thought that was interesting and then Millenium made it so that she was actually a Manhunter spy. I thought "Devastated stalker Lana" was great and a tragic twist to Lana's character and added some great guilt to Clark's character once he found out. Then they just made it so she was complelled by the Manhunters to follow him around. A great piece of character development destroyed by a lame-assed crossover that no one remembers. Oh, and how in the HELL would a former Manhunter spy ever become First Lady? Like that'd ever happen! But, then again, we are talking about a universe where people fly around in tights and fight crime... :O)
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You know what, fair enough Buzz. I agree that all too often Robbo gets the devil horns slapped on him, when all he is doing is making a living. The fact is, companies still hire(d) him, and folks bought his stuff by the truckload for years. Why SHOULD he change. Hell, I bought a ton of them myself, being an X-addict. But I do feel like I'm entitled to criticise his work... no because I'm an expert in anatomy, but because too often, his art pulls me out of the book I'm reading, squinting, trying to position the page so that the image makes sense in some way. There are plenty of other artists out there whose styles don't click with me, but none have made me react as negatively as Rob. I'm sure he's a swell guy, and he certainly seems dedicated to the medium. But I reserve the right to say he "sucks"... in my opinion, of course.
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Hold the train Buzz. I was w/ you on most of it. You even made me feel sorry for Liefeld, who I'm sure is a really nice person and I hope he becomes better at his craft, BUT
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Anyone read Erik Larsen's latest column at Comic Book Ressource? I had't realized thier was still bad feeling over the name witheld letter that Larsen wrote to Comic Buyers Guide when Image was first founded. Anyway in his latest column he takes a not so veiled shot at Peter David.
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From what I have heard (which would get a yellowish light on LITG) Rob back in the heyday refused to pay a lot of people working for him, instead throwing parties at strip clubs with plenty of booze and drugs. When he ran out of cash he would option another property to Hollywood. Yes the dude had a serious coke problem. Not to mention the whole "I say I'm drawing these books but in reality it's 5 of my cronies" fiasco (that's what happened right?). Plus doing an enormous amount to help the industry crash in the late 90s. (2 week old foil covers for $100, anyone?) Hell for all I know he could have reformed and is a great guy (or always has been), but his work hasn't grown a lick. And yes I know the consumer had a lot to do with what happened in the 90s. But like I said before, I think Liefeld's ART at it's BEST is still terrible and hurting the medium, and it's a shame that he's spent more money than somebody like Craig Thompson will ever make. That's all. Just a shame.
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ive seen all varieties at the comic shop i go to and quite a few of the people in my circle that i consider star wars and comic geeks galore not only have very active social lives with large circles of friends but they also have partners of the opposite sex. the mouth breathing basement dweller stereotype doesnt apply to all people who read comics.i know it doesnt apply to me.yes i know i post at AICN comics all day long but its because im at work. i do this in between my calls.when im at home or on the weekend i rarely post because im usually out and about.the point im trying to make is that i have a social life outside of reading comics and im not gods gift to women but i dont consider myself to be a bad looking guy.hey i even have a booty call/fuck friend who is pretty damn attractive.so the whole statement about 'were not the cool kids and never where' i guess i can only say speak for yourself
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Last time I was in the Shop on a Wednesday, I'd have sworn there was a radiation leak nearby. I practically invented ugly, so it's pretty bad when I'm the best looking person (including the chicks) in the place.
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I agree with all of it. And Shigeru, we're supposed to start hating people because they had/have coke problems? There goes a third of my friends. And we're supposed to expect people's work to grow? Whose work has grown?
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Hit a little close to home with that one, didn't I?
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...they live in Canada, they're not from around here, they go to a different school and we wouldn't know them, and no, they are not employed at Tyrone's House O' Hos.
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Aug 25, 2005 2:04:19 PM CDT
Yeah, I Like Liefeld Better Because Of The Coke & Booze...
by buzz maverik
...It's those people who don't pollute their bodies that scare and irritate the shit out of me! More coke and booze! And no bogarting! And screw paying people! If Rob can get away with stiffing his employees, more power to him because I ain't working for the guy and if I was, you better believe I'd collect. I'd be there saying, "I-want-my-money." Ever see POINT BLANK with Lee Marvin and not that pansy assed version PAYBACK with Mel Gibson. Walker never said much, except, "I-want-my-money." My favorite scene was when Angine Dickinson told him, "I know what's going to happen. He'll show up, you'll tell him you want your money, he'll refuse and you'll kill him."
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Aug 25, 2005 2:08:51 PM CDT
didnt hit close to home i just dont like the generalization
by darth kal-el
that all comic/movie geeks are overweight,pasty,mouth breathing socially inept douche bags.i know im not.
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Some of 'em are too skinny.
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Back when i really got into comics...my favourite artist was Rob Liefeld. And heroes reborn was like the best thing ever! I realize noq that, yeah, crappola, but back then i was even trying to draw like Liefeld. ***Sadly no, i don't know Carolina Cruz, she's a celebrity of course...she has one of those Regis & Kelly kinda morning talk shows and everyone involved in it knows she's retarded so they use her for that effect. Gets pretty funny at times, i hear. And even tho' she wouldn't be my first choice i'd still give her the gift of bone. ***I do like to know what my fav creators look like. Not cause i wanna find out if they're dreamy, but there's a sense of...what, connection?--when you know what their faces look like. Like say, Alan Moore with his long hair and beard and the creepy rings he wears and shit...that's half the fun right there. Azzarello, i've seen two video interviews of him and the guy really is ugly. Altho' i guess he looks kinda dangerous. Or gay, i dunno. Like a skinny Greg Rucka with a large sized nose. I saw this interview of him AND Risso. Risso of course speaking spanish with a translator at hand. It was fucking cool.
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as a catch phrase we could do worse
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is it online?do u have a link? risso is argentinian from what i heard. i dig their accents so itll be cool to hear him talk about 100 bullets.wow now i have to look up more info on carolina cruz.that sounds like a cool show too.
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My shop is the only decent place to buy comics in 80 miles of where I live (the other place has a creepy guy with cats that run all over the books, fuckin' Ocala). Mega Comics is my shop. Love the place and the guy's there are awesome and the customers aren't the bottom dwelling losers you so blatantly have branded all of them/us to be. With every place you're going to have the losers or the bad apples, but that shouldn't be a generalization as Kal-El said. For every moviemack you got 4 or 5 All Week Cog Smoochers is the way I look at it. Those are good odds. I take my girl all the time to the shop, the guy's even know to give her my file on site if I'm not with her because guess what? she goes there alone sometimes. I've even taken my cousin and his wife and run into some fellow graphic designers and genuinely nice and creative people. Maybe it's because it's a college town, maybe it's because I'm a mac, er I mean I'm on a Mac, or maybe it's because what I say is true.
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or because I'm a mac. : )
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But no such luck. It was this thing DC was doing at its site, interviewing creators and shit. They interviewed Vaughan on Y and Morrison too. I think Risso and Azz were talking about doing Batman, which isn't so cool but hey. And yeah Risso is in fact argentino. ***I remember this time i was in Miami and i was obviously looking for comics so my friend took me to this comic shop nearby. It was a dark and dingy place, and it was a fucking MESS! Comics thrown on the floor, junk all over the place, looked like someone had just robbed it 5 minutes ago. I was genuinelly scared some sort of large rodent would jump on my back from one of the racks. Then i saw the guy running the place. A fat disgusting bearded dude eating a burrito i kid you fucking not! He didn't even say anything to me, like i wasn't gonna give him money for his comics. I kept thinking "this is weird territory, i gotta get out" so i did and i told my friend "take me to Borders". He did and now i'm the guy who always goes to Borders to buy the trades. Well whenever i'm in the states.
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Where does the expression "Junmped the shark" come from? Thanks.
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Is from an episode of Happy Days. Apparently The Fonz was surfing and "jumped a shark" in the water. Hence, people always say jumped the shark when something was done too soon, or shouldn't have been done at all. Or at least that's what I recall. Hope it helps.
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its like heathen said only from what i heard its used to describe when something that was previously good goes bad. like happy days was a really cool show until the episode where fonzie jumped the shark. it was all downhill from there and ultimately it was cancelled.hence,'jumped the shark'
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and the comics they have aren't that bad of a selection either. The one where I live carries Fables, Hellblazer, JSA Classified, Astonishing, JSA, and the norm. The comic shopin Ocala, FL is fucking balls. I've been there twice and the solitary fucker who works there looks like an old pedafile and has not once said anything to me and I was the only person in the shop! I was like, "hey I'm here to spend money, offer me some help or just say hi." Then his three cats jumped up on the comic boxes that were moist and all the bags were that sickly old brown. And his current issues he had out included Exiles, New X-Men, Rogue, Gambit, and about ten others that were about as thrilling. I know what you mean Vale! The 2nd and last time I went there he was talking to what looked like his dealer saying that George Lucas has NEVER done anything accept Star Wars, and he meant it. No THX 1138, no American Graffiti, no Indiana Jones. There's you a guy Buzz.
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Something good gone bad
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Not to be a nerd but Fonzie Jumps the shark using a motorcycle and yes it sucked.
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no it's when Fonzie jumped the shark...like HAD SEX with that shark. It was hot.
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that does sound hugely gay!
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I just don't feel bad for them or respect them all that much. Esp when they draw shitty triangle feet and "GOTTAPOOP!GOTTAPOOP!" faces on everybody.
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learn something new every day
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when a shark goes oral on someone.
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i didnt know that.
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This term is explained at this web site: http://www.jumptheshark.com/
P.S. When Prof gets back, please finish the interview with Umar. I don't know why you bothered with the losers with her.
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Know what show jumped the shark big time? The Simpsons. Makes me so sad seeing what's happened to one of my favourite things ever...i wish someone would put it out of its misery. Oh and sharks always go oral on everything.
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what comic has jumped the shark in the past few years?
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Aug 25, 2005 4:52:51 PM CDT
But, Heathen, I Never Said Comic Fans Were Bottom Dwelling Loser
by buzz maverik
I merely manipulated you guys into saying that. Look at my original post, which I stand by. Saying that Gail Simone is more attractive than, well, you and your friends is not saying any of you are overweight, pasty, mouth breathing douche bag, bottom dwelling losers, is it? And as for Moviemack, isn't he your own personal little Rob Liefeld? He's a unifier, someone you all get to hate that helps make you a group. He's no stupider than your average talkbacker. I mean, he told me he was an idiot because I said I liked a musical act that he didn't, which is a pretty stupid thing to do...but you see tons of that in the talkbacks. No, don't tell me what your beef with him is because it'll just waste your time and bore me. And for the record, telling me that Rob Liefeld sucks really doesn't mean much to me. I'm not the President of the Rob Liefeld Fan Club. I'm merely the guy who points out that every fanboy on Earth says the same exact things about Rob Liefeld because it makes them one of the club. Fanboys are a consensus culture, much like the culture of Japan. There must be agreement or there is no opinion. Ever see MEAN GIRLS? Lindsay Lohan movie. Even fanboys have to have a pecking order, have to have someone to attack for group cohesion, whether it's Rob Liefeld or Moviemack (whom you insulted even though he doesn't appear to be around or doing anything to you). The only question I have, is when you guys take your girlfriends into these shops, can anybody else actually see them or hear them? I mean, I had this on and off thing with this chick all through high school and come prom night, I found out that she was just this picture I cut out of a magazine.
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http://tinyurl.com/bwnua *** there's that link that also mentions that w/ Speakeasy taking over publishing that it will release issues 1-3 w/ bonus material and continue to release 4-8. Check it out.
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is one i always associate with the aicn talkbacks and not in a positive way. it remonds me of long drawn out geeks arguments over whose favorite geeky property is better and which one has jumped the shark.i equate it in my mind to "sexy beanpole","drank a beer and cheated on his wife" and 'lame hulk hogan impressions,BROTHER'.its just somehting u expect to hear on aicn
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...Let's hear it for the Invisible Girlfriends! I want each and every to stop taking your Imaginary Girlfriends for granted because they put up with your shit and that bad boy behavior that every unreal woman secretly craves. Everybody, go buy your Imaginary Girlfriend five dozen roses, take her out for a fancy dinner and dancing (be careful that no other comic geeks swoops in on her). If you make it home without being committed, I want you to go all out when you make love to her. The full five minutes, with the computer off! I kid...I kid because...it's just too damned easy.
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"Also, Gail Simone's looks. I don't know you guys who are talking about Gail's looks, but I'll bet she's a better looking chick than you are a dude. You're reading comics"maybe it wasnt said in so many words but the implication is certainly there.i think the comment i made about it was only that its unfair to generalize all of us into that statement.and yes buzz actual living,breathing human females not magazine cutouts not imaginary or internet "girlfriends".while im not claiming to be a stud or a mack i also wont lump myself into a generalized stament that an overweight older lady(who looks nice as hell by the way) is a better looking representation of a female than i am of a male
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I don't care if me telling you that Liefeld sucks bores you or doesn't get a rise out of you, it wasn't intended to. Maybe you just "manipulated" me into that w/ your cunning wit. And 'lil moviemack isn't my personal Liefeld, I'd like Rob a whole lot better probably. And he didn't make the All Weekers a group mind you, the last I heard of him he through a dart at me then ran off, kinda like Kung Fu Hustler did. I don't fancy those types. And for you to say that he's, and I quote, "no stupider than your average talkbacker" is incorrect. He has been a racist and a homophobe on these talkbacks and has a peculiar venom in almost everything he posts. Can you just believe for a moment that not everybody is a "standard" person or geek Buzz? There are more than just two shades of color in the palette. Not everything is so monochromatic. Damn Buzz, I'd sooner read all of Daves manga before I see things the way you do at this moment.
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He's trying to mess with us, hit us where it hurts and all that shit, proving we all have too much time on our hands. And why didn't you review anything this week Buzz?
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Aug 25, 2005 5:24:56 PM CDT
HEY BUZZ YOU STOP SAYING MY BOYFRIEND DARTH KAL-EL IS A PASTY OV
by darth kal-el
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Aug 25, 2005 5:25:08 PM CDT
He was crafting the ultimate invisible cardboard cut out of
by the heathen
Mike Turner's Kara Zor-El! I joke Buzz, I joke. Why didn't you review anything this week? You got an interview up your pipe, or down the pipe, or whatever it is next week? If so, do tell who it is.
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Aug 25, 2005 5:25:58 PM CDT
da fug?!! get away from my keboard bitch or ill deflate u and pu
by darth kal-el
sorry guys that was my imaginary GF.
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Morenna Baccarin. Tomorrow it's Carolina Cruz and Sunday it's Britney Spears 'cause I need to make a sacrifice to the gods to prevent the birth of the anti-christ. I'm tired of work today.
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You bring one little cactus full of scorpion eggs into the asshole clubhouse and everybody makes a big deal about it! Like I knew it was going explode when they all hatched.
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I owe her that. : )
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Aug 25, 2005 5:35:21 PM CDT
And, Hey, Some Of The Best Relationships Of My Life Have Been Im
by buzz maverik
I'm still paying alimony to this one imaginary ex. Plus, I'm putting two imaginary kids, who don't know that I'm their Dad, through college. It's not all bad, though. I've got this one imaginary ex and we're still friends, still hang out...
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Dangerous and highly depraved. I sicken even myself!
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Aug 25, 2005 5:41:03 PM CDT
Brittney, Heather? Aw, C'mon, You Can Do Better Than That.
by buzz maverik
Brittney is for guys who don't know any better. I'll tell you what, I'll set you up with a couple of imaginary chicks that I don't know who will make you see Brittney for what she is. Let's see, I'll need to order a case of tequila, retain a lawyer...
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So that's 3 thigs you got going for you.
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hey heathen when your done with morena and carolina can i take an imgainary turn with them? it aint no fun if the internet homies cant have none!
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not for pleasure. And don't call me by my former real name
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want to help me sacrifice Spears?
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..."practically" invented ugly. If I'd been the actualy inventor, well, look out world! But no, as I reached the patent office, none other than Bea Arthur himelf was coming out. So, it's not false modesty when I say that I only have the two things going on.
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"...bea arthur himself." this place keeps me laughin all day! thanks for making my work hours go by quicker you cog smoochers!i give you all THE GIFT OF BONE!!! yes thats right. dont crowd around now theres plenty to go around
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Oh, I see that I called you "Heather". Sorry about that. I meant to call you "Heathen", your given fake name. But I make no apologies about spelling Brittany's name, because ya can't insult plastic. It's just plastic.
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Aug 25, 2005 6:04:49 PM CDT
i just hate the anti- christ to sound cool and to fit it
by darth kal-el
him and that asswipe rob liefeld
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sorry im lame
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You can't insult plastic. So, scorpion eggs eh?
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it's okay for you to take Morena now Kal-El. Have a good rest of your day everybody.
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Aug 25, 2005 6:29:20 PM CDT
shes already blowing me under my desk but thanks for that heath
by darth kal-el
have a good one!
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Gary Busey ugly?
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Aug 25, 2005 7:03:35 PM CDT
Do you guys ever talk about comic books in these comic book talk
by astronato
Or is it always a pissing contest?
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Aug 25, 2005 7:05:58 PM CDT
its mostly contests to see who can piss on the most comics in th
by darth kal-el
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Damn, that is ugly! I wish I would have thought of that instead of the Bea Arthur gag! I'm partial to the term "butt ugly" but it's a cliche. Didja ever see the movie DUDES? Jon Cryer and Daniel Roebuck are these NYC punk rockers, who along with Flea from the Red Hot Chili Peppers are travelling across country and run afoul of Lee Ving of Fear as a redneck. Flea is killed and Jon and Roebuck (as Biscuit) hunt down the rednecks, gradually getting into Western imagery of cowboys and Indians. When Cryer's Graham confront Ving and a croney in a diner, Ving doesn't recognize him and says, "Hey, boy, settle a bet for me and my buddy. Who's uglier, him or me?" Graham says, "You." The rednecks laugh and Ving says, "How ugly am I, boy?" Graham says, "Butt ugly!" But Gary Busey ugly is even uglier than butt ugly. I'm sorta young Bill Murray ugly myself.
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...step right up because I can piss further and longer than you any day of the week.
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Do the reviewers get paid? Is the reason that there aren't more reviews than there are because the reviewers are part time? or are they shorthanded? I'm not complaining about the reviewers, they do a good job even when I disagree, I'm just asking why aren't there more reviews more often?
I buy mostly DC comics but some Marvel,DarkHorse,Moonstone and Alias. I buy Archie, Uncle Scrooge and Little Lulu for the kids in my family. I like cowboy comics,crime noirs,war comics, you name it. I'd like you to review all kinds of comics but please don't skimp on the superheroes. -
I'd just rather you guys talked about comics. There is always so much soap opera on these talkbacks. The webmaster should just delete needlessly rude comments and get back on topic.
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I know we tend to talk a lot of shit in these here talkbacks but i'm not so sure about the needlessly rude comments you're talking about. Bout a day after the reviews are posted we all weekers are pretty much left on our own, and we're pretty friendly to eachother. Generally we'll discuss anything and everything including comics. And no, the reviewers don't get paid, they review the books they buy.
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She's plastic and sitting on my couch. Her mouth makes a perfect "O".
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Sorry to hear your not getting paid. You guys do a good job, I just would like more. I thought you guys were on a payroll. Nevermind me.
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Sorry to have confused you, i'm not a reviewer myself. I don't know how you get that job, but either way yeah, they do a good job.
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el vale doesn't review...just writes porn...how has everyone been this week?
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Wish i did tho', wish i did. I've also written a Batman comic or two, believe it or not. No Mark Chamberlain Batman either.
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Check this out: http://tinyurl.com/8ugb9
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I disagree. The rudeness in these talkbacks is absolutely needed, jackasses. (see?) And Buzz, I envy you the alimony sent to your imaginary ex. Perhaps if mine was imaginary, she wouldn't notice when I skip a payment... or six.
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See I just moved and haven't got the net at my new place yet...and look at all I miss! Well anyways... Yes Henry Winkler is gay. Loves the cock. Hell I dunno I might have just made that up. Anybody wants the real story they're gonna have to track down that shark. And Buzz kinda has a point... a culture based around non-conformity can often breed it's own kind of conformity from within (eg- HOT TOPIC and "punk"), but comparing us to Mean Girls was mean! (mmmm...Lohan funbags...) At least we try to strive against conformity while others embrace it. Okay I can't end this post with something serious...so... SMOOCH MY COG BITCHES
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I was one of the few people who hated his artwork from the get go. I remember seeing New Mutants and wondering what the big deal was. Most of the fan boys were nuts about him. Ok I don't think anyone on the staff of the comic book shop I worked at actually liked Liefeld's stuff with one exception. The guy thought Liefeld was being deliberatly ironic in spoofing the industry. Go figure!
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Aug 26, 2005 12:22:12 PM CDT
Anyone that defend Leifeld need only look at Captain America'
by mortsleam
The man has no concept of anatomy, proportion, perspective or narrative flow. Period. Never has, never will. He was originally hired as a Hulk/Spidy era Todd Macfarlane clone, and did his best (though still quite mediocre) work in New Mutants, right before he killed that book off and infested the Marvel Universe with preposterous guns, big shoulder pads and tiny heads and feet. Look at the work of Greg Capullo, who followed Leifeld on X-Force, even if by that time no one payed attention becuase Marvel was busy destroying the industry with crossovers and foil covers. The difference in storytelling and draftsmanship between Leifeld and Capullo is staggering, and shows just how much of an amateur Leifeld really was. And still is. The fact that credible characters were formed out of the macho, steroid, militia idiot cyphers that he created is a testament to the writers and artists that came after him and sought to undo the damage he inflicted on comics. God help Gail Simone for getting involved with that.
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Note: In this post, the phrase "jumped the shark" will be replaced with the phrase "ate the tuna". *** Happy Days ate the tuna when Fonzie jumped the shark. Simpsons ate the tuna when Maude Flanders died. The X-Books ate the tuna when Magneto came back from the dead and said he was never Xorn. Spider-Man ate the tuna when Gwen Stacy jumped the Goblin. The Marvel Universe as a whole ate the tuna when the Avengers were dissassembled without logical precedent or provocation. DC ate the tuna when they decided to be Marvel. mortsleam ate the tuna when he seriously used the phrase "ate the tuna" to discuss creative entropy in trivial entertainment on a movie news rumor website.
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funniest. line. ever. XFiles ate the tuna when Mulder left. Prime example of fish consumption.
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especially w/ The Simpsons and X-Files.
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Well, I did ask you a few things in an earlier post of mine involving what other books you are reading or were thinking of. So get back at me and let me know, I'll be here All Week. *** About comics. I just finished the Invincible HC last night, and I really enjoyed it. Can't wait for the movie if it's done proper. Props to Kirkman. The only thing that bugged me was the Rorshach(?) parody. *** The other books I read last night were all of the Hip Flask stuff and damn were they cool. Love Ladronn's art and the story by Starkings and Joe Casey is a cool pulp science fiction tale of the "unhumans" who are intelligent animals raised by a crazy doctor in a compound called Mappo. I can't suggest a better thing out there right now for overall quality. The 1st issue is Hip Flask: Unnatural Selection, the 2nd is Hip Flask #0: Elephantmen and the 3rd is Hip Flask: Mystery City. The only problem I can see is that there have only been 3 issues in three years, but check them out anyway *** www.hipflask.com *** btw it's pretty cool why Hip Flask is called Hip Flask too. *** Are we happy now? Damn! Carolina is wearing me out today. She's giving imaginary Morena a run for the money! And damn you Vale for the Pia Guerra link. I always thought she looked like Shakira, but even more pretty. Oh well. : (
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And she doesn't even look Latin. But frankly I don't give two craps what she looks like as long as she keeps drawing the holy hell out of Y. Her sequential pacing is so damn smooth, I am glad she is back with this last issue.
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and not the imaginary Girls, but the Girls comic by the Luna brothers. I'm liking it.
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finally made it to the store yesterday and got a couple of things. there actually wasnt too much in my box.i had the new conan waiting which i havent read yet and then i picked up ultimate x-men annual off the rack altho im sorry i did. those are 4 dollars i could have drank with! i guess the art looked cool in the store but when i actually got into it at home i was severely disapointed. lame story lame art lame "death" of a character for no good reason so im sure well see a return. and man the ultimate juggernaut looks horrible! picture a huge black helmet with a red slit followed by a grotesquely buff guy in jeans. i dont think he was even wearing shoes! it was quite liefeldian in its ability to disturb. hopefully the conan will be good. finally got my invincible trade but havent crakced it yet. also,i saw comics for nightmare on elm street, friday the 13th and texas chainsaw which looked pretty cool.has anyone read these so i know if i should get them or go buy a trade?oh and the marvel visionaries hardcover with some early chris claremont work came in! this looks good!damn i wish i was rich!
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So Ulty Juggy looks stupid? Who penciled the annual? Those covers for Nightmare on Elm Street and Texas Chainsaw are freaken gruesome! But the art does look sweet on the covers I've seen. I think the Freddy book has a leather bound variant cover or something too. I may drive up to my shop after work just to look at all the beautiful people, and if I feel like it I may get my books too! How's Morena Kal-El?
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we're talking about comics! Btw, Dave_F reviewed a trade of $crooge McDuck a few weeks ago that really interested me. I think he said it was $13 for 12 issues. Just in case you were interested astro.
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but she did agree to an imaginary 3some with kaylee.oh yes i totally made her stay in character. whay have an actress when u can have a companion?yeah ultimate juggernaut looks very stupid.all in all i shoudl have know better than to pick it up because it did have ultimate gumbo-er gambit on the cover. but it said vaughan for writing credits so i thought id be ok. im really curious about those horror comics!i flipped through them at the store but i wanted to get some opinions before putting the cash down. of the 3 i gotta say the texas chainsaw one looked the most gruesome. theres a scene towards the back of the book where a girl wakes up with her hands nailed to a table and is then made to snort some kind of drain cleaner from what i gathered. then theres four panels of her trying to free her hands followed by her vomiting blood and falling doen dead on the table. truly gruesome stuff.hey vale dont worry about the porn were not(at least not me) trying to pressure u.bring it when its good and ready. there nothing worse than rushed porn. been good blackthought hows things in your neck or the woods, you 'last' claiming cog smooch,you.
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but i didnt want buzz to call me a fat,pasty comic loving,mouth breathing douche bag again.
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give us some info on the sci-fi story and your Batman stories. Speaking of porn though, I watched a documentary about Katie Morgan last night on HBO w/ my girl and it was pretty funny. There's nothing better than having your girl say that a porn chick is kinda cute and funny. Texas Chainsaw did indeed look like the most gruesome of the three. I think they all have "gory" version covers too. And why'd it have to be Booster blackthought, WHY!!!
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http://tinyurl.com/7dyot *** damn gruesome.
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i second the vote for more links to fanfic.on a related note im starting at the academy of arts university via their online program next week.im shooting for a bachelors in motion picture and television with an emphasis on screenwriting.once i get a few things going i will link to some of my stuff.i expect brutally honest criticism
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gruesome as hell tho.
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I better do more than what i'm doing now w/ my work life. I'm bored as hell right now at my job.
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home of the most beautiful people in a comic shop ever! Ahh, kidding aside I'll see if I can chime in tomorrow, but to be honest I'm in the process of moving to a house that we're renting (hopefully buying in the next year) and I may be busy. Carry the torch Cog Smooches!!!
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have fun moving man! hope it goes well.
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I didn't see you message. Sorry. Yes, Other than the stuff listed in my Newsarama signature i've picked up Moonstones Wyatt Earp and Star Belle, Alex Ross's Kingdom Come, DC New Frontier, AC comics Best of the West, Alias' Armorquest, Battle of the Planets, the Tick, Worlds Best Comics sampler, Marvels Hercules mini series, Adam Strange Planet Heist trade, Essential Fantastic Four and Essential Doctor Strange, and a slew of back issues of the dozen and a half monthly titles I have been buying the past few months. You could say the comic book bug bit me again. I hadn't bought any superhero books since the late 80's or any comics at since the early 90's. I have a 15 years of catching up to do. So what do you guys read? anything good?
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I didn't see you message. Sorry. Yes, Other than the stuff listed in my Newsarama signature i've picked up Moonstones Wyatt Earp and Star Belle, Alex Ross's Kingdom Come, DC New Frontier, AC comics Best of the West, Alias' Armorquest, Battle of the Planets, the Tick, Worlds Best Comics sampler, Marvels Hercules mini series, Adam Strange Planet Heist trade, Essential Fantastic Four and Essential Doctor Strange, and a slew of back issues of the dozen and a half monthly titles I have been buying the past few months. You could say the comic book bug bit me again. I hadn't bought any superhero books since the late 80's or any comics at since the early 90's. I have a 15 years of catching up to do. So what do you guys read? anything good?
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I didn't see you message. Sorry. Yes, Other than the stuff listed in my Newsarama signature i've picked up Moonstones Wyatt Earp and Star Belle, Alex Ross's Kingdom Come, DC New Frontier, AC comics Best of the West, Alias' Armorquest, Battle of the Planets, the Tick, Worlds Best Comics sampler, Marvels Hercules mini series, Adam Strange Planet Heist trade, Essential Fantastic Four and Essential Doctor Strange, and a slew of back issues of the dozen and a half monthly titles I have been buying the past few months. You could say the comic book bug bit me again. I hadn't bought any superhero books since the late 80's or any comics at since the early 90's. I have a 15 years of catching up to do. So what do you guys read? anything good?
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the message read internal server error and I thought it didn't take. Shite.
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I bought a Scrooge subscription for my niece. I read them myself and use the kids as an excuse. There are two expensive hardcover collections of Uncle Scrooge and Little Lulu from Another Rainbow at my local comic shop. Does anyone know if they are worth the price? they are $135 a piece. I think they are color reprints.
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or Godland? Frankenstein Mobster? Cisco Kid? Freedom Force?
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you been out of the loop for 15 years? dont feel bad i think most of us have gone through that. i remember when i first got back into comics in 98' after a 5 year hiatus i just devoured evrythhing put in front of me(comics whise off course).off the top of my head some things you should track down:preacher,ultimate spider man,the ultimates,100 bullets,fables,invincible,walking dead,powers and gotham central spring to mind as series that have a lot of trades out for you to pick up. i currently read conan,ultimate spider man,100 bullets,superman/batman,powers,the ultimates,new avengers, young avengers,the walking dead and invincible regulary but i will pick up random books if they strike my interest or if theyre recomended here in the column and they sound like somehting id like. ive heard ex machina is good but can only vouch for the 1st issue and runaways is a popular recomendation around here too but i personally didnt care for it ins ingle issue format but have been meaning to go back and get the trade. invincible is a book from image comics with a very cool twist on superheros.i dont want to give too much away other than to say i highly recomend it.does that help?
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I stopped buying comics in 1990 or so. Comics books have always been on my radar to an extent. My brother would stray into a book store once in a while and I would check out what he had, I made two visits to a comic book store in the mid 90's but for the most part I have been out of the loop for a long time. The Hal Jordan Rebirth thing sparked my interest in comics again. I am getting Conan. I like it a lot. I don't get New Avengers (I buy the regular Captain America book) but I do like the new team line up. What is Invincible?
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sorry. I'll get the hang of this stuff yet.
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is it still around? I liked it.
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So is Invincible a homage/send up of any particular superheroes? Like Squadron Supreme is the Justice League and the Watchmen were the Justice Society (or the Archie Superheroes)? I might like that. What makes it different?
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my memory is hazy at the moment. I think Night Owl was the Blue Beetle.
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has degenerated into firefly geeks discussing the possibility of the show existing in a "binary" or "trinary" system. whats scary is a lot of the people in there seem to know what the hell that means
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the basic premise is a young teenager is the son of earths mightiest super hero.think a 'superman' type being complete with otherworldy origin.this guys is in a team that is definately a play on the JLA.its great because in the series hes married and has a kid and you see a lot of his interaction with his wife and family. things like having to fly out in the middle of dinner becasue the world needs saving again that kind of thing. the series starts with the kid wondering if hes ever going to develop his own super powers and follow in his dads footsteps. he does eventually in what is a pretty cool way.remeber in high school when you had that shitty job at the burger joint or the yogurt shop like i did when u would do menial things like sweep or take out the trash and just daydream about something better?he discovers his powers in that moment.its pretty funny.anyways so he gets his powers and starts being trained by his dad and basically fighting alongside him and other super hereos.it starts out pretty light showing a lot of moments with invincible and his dad. theres a great scene in one of the issues where theyre both sitting back to back flaying over some clouds and playing catch with a baseball and baseball mitts only throwing the ball around the earth. but all is not as it seems. i will not spoil it for you only to say go get it
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read matt wagner's Mage volume 1 the hero discovered and volume 2 the hero defined.
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let's see heathen...i have no clue why it had to be booster gold...the world is cruel...darth...of coarse i claim last...hell, gus and i are the originators :)...kinda like a creative team...lee and ditko...who is who?...and i've just been busy with school crap...animating, modeling crap, um...some other crap...i definately back invincible and runaway recommendations...i love those books...not as much as i love you guys...*cue violins*
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What amazing stuff. Not for everyone tho', least of all hardcore superhero fans...Dave calls these books "The boring european comics" but Incal is an amazing book. The story by Jodorowski's fantastic but you all know very well it's all about Moebius and he sure delivers. Go ahead and read it, i think it's absolutely fantastic.
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Been one busy day, it's 1 am and i just got home. Tired as hell. ***Ok so Astronato, im gonna recommend these books to you: Preacher, Ultimates, Y: the last man, Fables, Morrison's New X-Men, Ed Brubaker's Catwoman, Powers...and i'll think of others.*** Now for some self promotion: I've written two Batman comics; one was like my answer to this whole "Asshole Batman" trend going on, and it was basically about someone asking Batman for help, and him being an asshole about it...and well it costs him big time. Wrote it for a friend of mine who draws a killer Batman but he's always busy and never got around to doing it. Too bad. The other comic was something i wrote for Maria, which we were going to submit to DC. We were told DC ain't taking submissions, the fuckers, but it's still in productions. It was a revamp of sorts of this JLA comic i read...won't explain it all but the Batman part of it involves an old retired Batman married to Catwoman, and Dick Grayson as the new Batman...Bats and Cats' son the new Robin. Well i just took that idea and tried running with it. That's it for me. Have a good one!
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Aug 27, 2005 2:24:04 AM CDT
Needlessly Rude. Aw, C'mon. What Would You Rather Be: A Fi
by buzz maverik
...or a hockey goon? But since this is a comic book column on a pop culture website, I can see the need to focus...What? No, really, this IS being helpful. Write this down.
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Aug 27, 2005 2:38:59 AM CDT
Oh, And The Way These Guys Got The Job Reviewing Comics Here Is.
by buzz maverik
...they're victims of a government mind control experiment. None of the @$$holes are actually aware that they review comics for this sight. Some of them don't even know they've ever read a comic book. See, the Company's goal was to see if you could get people to do what no one in their right mind would do. I said, "How's about reviewing comic books?" They said, "Comic reviews? Don't most readers just look at the cover and say Bitchin', Spidey's fightin' Doc Ock?" And I'm all, "Uh, yeah." They said if I could get people to read the reviews, I'd get my funding. Next, I'm going to make people think their addicted to number 2 lead pencils!
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...they were a crack Special Forces Unit reported killed in Desert Storm and this is just their cover?
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i thought #2 lead pencils were a figment of the imagination.
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just dropping by to say hey.didnt get ne new comics today but i reread the frank miller wolverine tpb.damns thats a good comic.even tho it had ninjas in it wich i dislike but still good stuff.heres a casting couch idea to carry us til next weeks column-what would be the perfect cast for a black panther movie?ill start it off by voting idris elba as tchalla:http://topps.2itb.com/timwebster.jpg
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of idris, he kicked much ass on the wire...i just dunno how much ass kicking he's capable of in a fighting sense which is why wesley would be perfect for the physical part if he didn't turn into a prima donna. i'd kinda like djimon honsou seeing how he is african and the man just kicks ass.
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if it wasnt for the blade movies. hes already embeded in peoples minds as that character.just like toby mcguire and hugh jackman could never portray any other marvel characters i think wesley has built the same kind of character indentity with blade. djimoun honsou is a good idea too. i know idris is older but he looks phisically fit from what ive seen and he can do the african accent well.he was in some movie i think it was called sometimes in april where he played an african character.i think with some workout time and fight training he could pull it off.and then picture wakanda being protrayed a little like zamunda in coming to america but showing more of an emphasis on the technoly advancements and the wealth.if they ever make a black panther movie i bet anythihng anthony anderson ends up with a part. hes a black movie whore
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starring charlie murphy
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First off, yes those were some good "ate the tuna" examples. And yes, I bought Liefeld's TT out of curiosity. But it wasn't that bad, and I agree that his art doesn't totally suck. I even like his druggy past. But he deserves all the brickbats for his insipid militia writing and for the many other books and creators who were negatively influenced by him. Now, way back when, comic writers were like movie writers appear to be today, not especially respected and definitely not in power. The dictatorial editor of the past eventually became more collaborative, and Image seems to be responsible for the writers-run-amuck situation of the past years. Props to Buzz for pointing all that out as well as defending Simone. I think most comic readers are geeks in some way, which doesn't mean we don't get laid, etc, but we're not the cool kids. Comics attract those of us who are outside the mainstream in some way, and I am fine with that. And I am also fine with my judgmental opinions on the appearance of everyone else in the world, even though I am no Brad Pitt myself. Human Nature, y'know.
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brad pitt if your not?
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When Ed Brubaker revamped CATWOMAN he made Slam a major supporting character, and he's been around ever since. Pick up the first trade or two for lots of Bradley. It's a much darker, more noir and crime based take on CATWOMAN with none of the T&A trappings of the previous series, and those first few trades have some wonderfully distinctive art.
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Aug 29, 2005 1:47:28 PM CDT
as much as i like charlie murphy that would be like the jack bla
by darth kal-el
i heard tchalla was mad niggerish wich is right up my alley.
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for catman before he became an uber-badass in villains united. who plays luke cage? seeing how that movie might come to be one day. and who plays jessica jones?
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Well here i am. How was your weekend, talkbacker?
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was filled with minutes.
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just spent too much money!
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Hopefully comics and cool shit.
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Aug 30, 2005 2:41:38 PM CDT
Loeb/Mad confirmed as the new Ultimates creative team. On relate
by el vale
Well, ok...this is the kind of bad news that can be ignored. Like believing in yourheart that Millar and Hitch's last issue is in fact the final Ultimates issue. Ultimates 3? There's no such thing as Ultimates 3 grandpa!
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Where the heck am I gonna get my (semi) monthly Bryan Hitch fix??! Well at least we will always have the hardcovers I suppose...
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but also on eating out and drinks. i also had to pay for some school related expenses so it wasnt all frivolousness.
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especially in this heat & humidity. Now I feel like an ass because of that bitch Katrina and all the grief she's caused the people in Lousiana & other states, but I did get hit by about 5 hurricanes last year. My thoughts are with anything connected to that mess. Thanks for the kind words though Kal-El. *** Astronato, I'd recommend Hip Flask, Walking Dead, Invincible, Astonishing X-Men, Desolation Jones, JSA, and Girls if you haven't checked those out. *** I say Djimoun Honsou for Black Panther. *** Not thrilled about the Ultimates news. It SHOULD NOT be done w/out Millar & Hitch (awesome last issue of the Wolverine arc btw) *** I have a craving for a #2 lead pencil for some reason. Hmm?
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Now that's a lot of OMACS! Sounds like a crisis to me. #5 was a good issue. I really liked Booster Gold (he's alive!!!) in this issue. The fight w/ the JLI against the OMACS was awesome. *** Day of Vengeance #5 was a good issue too. I liked the explanation of the Shadowpact and their purpose. I wasn't expecting that and the way it worked out makes this an even more thought out story on Willinghams part. My favorite thing about this issue was the cover. It had old school captions on the cover that was pretty cool. *** Batman: War Crimes. I'm not liking it. Plain and simple. I just don't care about this story and it's not needed w/ everything else that Batman is doing in OMAC and JLA. *** I hated Milligans "Golgotha" arc on X-Men and I only partially disliked this latest 4 issue arc. The abrupt ending (much like the last arc) left a sour note, but the second & third issues I liked.
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George Clooney or Tom Selleck. I think both have the look and the demeanor for the part. George might bring in more money, but either one would be awesome in my opinion. I'm leaning a little more towards Clooney, but his last venture as a superhero didn't turn out so well. *** http://tinyurl.com/bhk28 *** http://tinyurl.com/8k6yn *** I couldn't resist after reading the Invincible HC!
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LIVES! SWEET!
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Soon as Millar's gone, so am I. I never gave a shit about Joe Mad, and Quesada failed to convince me at Wizard World Chicago that the book was gonna drop on time. I also HATED every issue I read of SUPERMAN/BATMAN, so I'm not at all interested in this title. It's all good, though--that's money I can spend on one of the four or five crazy new Vertigo titles dropping in the next six months, like LOVELESS or THE EXTERMINATORS or DMZ or whatever else.
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I thought it was okay, but I wasn't thrilled with it. Pretty intense interogatioin scene though. It could grow on me, but I'm spending too much on books right now s I'm not sure if I'll stay past #2.
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I really like Warren Ellis as a writer. A big part of the reason for that is he's always looking for ways to change up his writing style, experiment with new story lengths and approaches, etc. A lot of people have taken him to task for helping launch the decompression craze, but this issue was anything but. It was slam-bang, "here's some crazy shit for you" type stuff with a big helping of social commentary, and I think it worked pretty well. Plus it's always nice to see my own home town blowed up.
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Is like blaming Alan Moore for grim n gritty. He was trying something different and he did it very well, just like Moore did back in the 80s.
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But it happens to the guy all the time. Does he use it as a tool? Absolutely, but it's not the only one he's got. In fact, next week FELL starts up from Image, and they're all set to be slightly shorter (I believe an 18-20 page standalone story and a short text piece) for only two bucks an issue. He wants to try shorter, quicker, more independent stories. He's also considering doing 48-page quarterly standalones, among other things. He likes to experiment with different approaches to the form to see what does and doesn't work, which is a large part of his appeal to me. Some people find a niche or approach that works for them and then they refine the hell out of it, and there's nothing wrong with that. But there should always be writers, artists and musicians taking chances and trying new approaches and styles. It's the only way to keep things fresh and interesting.
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I like the structure premise. Full stories every 2 issues. It should be fast paced and fucked up and a blast. "Healing America by beating people up" i think is the tagline.
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read the black panther HOM tie in? so far i've found HOM to be meh and blah but i must say this black panther ish totally rocked.
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mainly because of my bank account. But I do give props to Ellis for doing different things w/ his writing style. Knowing me, Jack Cross will be probably be the best series ever and that wouldn't be bad accept for the aformentioned bank account. The way Cross dealed w/ how his interogation scene in the bathroom was unexpected and a nice twist too. *** blackthought, tell me more about the Black Panther HoM tie in.
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Aug 31, 2005 12:21:33 PM CDT
Actually, I Blame Kevin Smith & Bendis For Decompression.
by buzz maverik
Decompression IS a tool as Sleazy said. When done well, no problem. It's when you notice it, that it's bad. When Kevin Smith started on DAREDEVIL, he didn't know how to write a comic book. Being able to read a comic book, having read thousands of comic books, well, that sort of qualifies you to be a comic book critic, but it doesn't necessarily qualify you to write a comic book. Very little happened in the first issue of what would come to be called GUARDIAN DEVIL. If I was a mid-westerner like Sleazy or Mr. Bendis, I would have said, "The hell?" If I was a Southerner or Southwesterner, I would have said "Whut the hell?" As a Southern Californian, I said, "What the fuck?" (which is what I think they also say in New York!). Mr. Smith seems like a cool guy, the kind of guy you'd want for a buddy, but at least then, he couldn't write a damned comic book. The true "The hell/what the hell/what the fuck" moment came when the book was wildly successful, making a shitload of money. You can't argue with a shitload of money. At the time, I think it was more due to someone who had made a name outside of comics, who still had a viable film career, doing a comic. Now, that's de riguer. Kevin Smith got a lot better when he wrote GREEN ARROW, but, man, he fucked up DAREDEVIL. Along comes Bendis. Much better writer than Mr. Smith. He's a complete comic book guy, meaning, he could do all the creative work on a comic book himself. Mr. Bendis is gifted at writing crime stories and comedy. He's one of the few comic book writers whose jokes don't make you cringe (most of the time; when he gets self-referential, he loses me). Superheroes...he really can't do, but he's doing it anyway and making it work, so you have to admire that. Couple the talent and chutzpah with what I've heard is a genuinely likable personality, naturally Joe Q. is going to want him to do everything. At any given time, he's been doing more books for Marvel than any other current writer and that's when the decompression got bad. That's when we got tons of meaningless splash pages in DD, etc. Because unlike Stan Lee, who wrote everything Marvel style and never wrote a full script in his life and relied on the artist for about 95% of the plot, I'm sure Mr. Bendis turns in full scripts. More than he could handle at the time. Again, to give him credit, he's sort of learned to make it work for him. Over the years, his style of storytelling has come to compliment the sparseness of the content but it wasn't like that at first. Now, Ellis...I never noticed the decompression in, say, PLANETARY, because each issue had a real beginning, middle and end, even when it was part of a greater whole that may take forever. It's when Ellis did his recent work at Marvel that the decompression got insulting because it really seemed like Warren could have been at his word processor typing, "Paycheck! Paycheck! Paycheck!" The money should only be about 90% of the motivation. You've got to have at least 5% sheer love of comics for it to work (with ego rounding up the other 5%). ULTIMATE NIGHTMARE. Issue #2, they go through a door...whoa! That screamed for compression. How's about opening splash, they go through the door. See what you can do with that, Warren.
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Aug 31, 2005 12:43:23 PM CDT
I'll tell you why Warren Ellis is the king of decompression!
by shigeru
Because @#*(&$ PLANETARY only comes out like once every #$@*(& EIGHT MONTHS!! $@#%)&@ #%@)&!! )$@#%!!! @#$!! THAT!! @#$!
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"Da fug?!" or so says (sometimes) Bendis I believe. As far as Planetary I've decided to wait however long it takes for the series to be over until I read it, otherwise I'd probably feel like Shigeru. Thought about doing that with Supreme Power as well.
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I'd like to get my hands on that one. Hey and i noticed a bunch of "The hell?"s in Y. And i think i saw one in 100 Bullets. Guess it's not an exclusively Bendis thing then. Ok so, Buzz...after Bendis went all decomp on our asses, who picked it up? Who took decompression to crappy new levels? I think the only name i ever hear when people talk about decompression is Bendis, so then it's not really a trend, just some guy's style. Enlighten me, sir
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i'm good.
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El, you've said you don't actually get the comics down there that you have opinions about, so I'll be happy to enlighten ya! There was Bruce Jones' fuckin' INCREDIBLE HULK! Guys, how many issues into the Abomination "arc" (Gawd, I hate arcs; what the hell happened to stories) before the Abomination actually got out of prison? I seem to remember four issues of some conspiracy guy talking to him. Every arc that Jones did was like that. Geoff Johns did a VISION mini series that was slower than shit when yer constipated. Johns also wrote an AVENGERS arc which apparently moved too fast for Marvel so they cut his scripts in half and spread them over two issues per script. The real culprit as far as decompression is editor Axel Alonso. Axel never edited a book where a 3 issue story didn't turn into 5 or 6. RAWHIDE KID: SLAP LEATHER mini, which was a hilarious spoof on Westerns, American macho, gay stereotypes, etc. Would have been great as 3 or 4 issues but was tiresome by five. Alonso also edited the Hulk. There was that Gawd awful, embarrassing SILVER SURFER series which was mostly about some grifter woman who's kid was abducted by the Surfer (because the writers had never heard of the Surfer before they got their contract, they assumed that we fans knew nothing about the character). It was hilarious reading the promos "SILVER SURFER # 7...Denise discovers her daughter's secret"!!!???? No, no, no, no! SILVER SURFER # 7 should be "The Surfer leads the Heralds of Galactus against the Elders of the Universe"! And those are just the ones that I've read because I avoid that decompression shit like the plague. It's for deadasses with slow minds, lethargy posing as depth. Nothing comics for the listless, for people who can't even be vital in their fantasies. And I'll go a step further. I don't think it was a trend. I think it was editorial policy at Marvel. They thought it was cinematic, when it was really off-Broadway dramatic.
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...in my original post on this subject, I meant to say that it seems like the trend toward decompression has eased since Bill Jemas got fired from Marvel. I don't really consider Bendis' work decompression any more. It's just Bendis being Bendis, and he does it well. As long as no one less talented than Bendis does it, it's fine. Believe it or not, I think the @$$hole's column has had an impact in that area. As their ousted leader, I can assure you that although the fans hate 'em, the pros like 'em. Even Bendis likes 'em. Their dedication to good storytelling and their opposition to weak comics is paying off in overall better comics.
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i thought u were just joking.good posts tho
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I remember reading Jones' Hulk, the first few arcs and really really really liking it. I thought it was awesome. I'm sure it derailed after that since everyone considers it some of the worst stuff to come along in the past few years...but everyone was raving about it in the beggining, and that makes for good stories. But people forget easily, i guess. As for Axel Alonso i just remember him editing Transmet and Preacher and 100 Bullets, so he gets all my respect. ***Also, dude they kicked you out? I liked your reviews. Seems the @$$hole ranks are trimming down fast, two more weeks and it'll be the Prof and Vroom reviewing 3 books plus 2 cheap shots. *** Finally, if i have an opinion on it, then i must have read some of it at least. I don't get comics here, that's for sure, but i always manage to get my hands on them, be it ordering them online or downloading them or whatever. I download a LOT of comics these days, i'm catching up.
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Aug 31, 2005 5:18:25 PM CDT
You Don't Get Kicked Out Of The @$$holes. You Get Jumped Ou
by buzz maverik
First, you gotta get jumped in, which I didn't have to go through because I started the thing, and at first consisted of me pounding the shit out of the first initiate. Then, we started making each sucessive new guy run a guantlet in which we each gave him one upside the head. It was no picnic for 'em, I'm sure. But getting jumped out is worse because they get to use weapons. I'm talking billy clubs, 2x4s, nunchukas, Super-Stretchable Mr. Fantastic toys and something that somebody bought in one of those...uh, let's just say it's a shop where they don't sell comics. I stood up to it, though, gave back as good as I got and came out on my feet whereas a lot of guys leaving other comic review groups have died in the attempt. Somebody threw me in the bed of a pick-up and dumped me outside an emergency room but they thought it was just another one of my schemes to get Vicodan, so they jumped me out of the hospital...which is worse because they beat you with bedpans and stick you with used needles.
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Everyone loved Jones' HULK at first. I sure did. And everyone raved about it. But everyone raving about it didn't make it good. The first "arc" was good, but soon it because clear that every "arc" was going to be the same. What was new and different was quickly revealed to be more formulatic than the old crazy, random Hulk stories. Worse, it was snail paced and tedious.
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Damn, ousted. They literally gave you the boot?
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You guys mark my words, it'll happen to your little group one day. I don't know which of you is the leader, the alpha male, because I can't tell you apart (don't be offended, I still can't tell the @$$holes apart) but the others will rise against him violently. I don't know if you're like the @$$holes. They're cruelty incarnate. Kept me locked in a file cabinet for 72 hours until I bounced it out the door and rolled down a flight of stairs and it broke open. Plus, they tried to pass off Dominican cigars as Cuban. As if my palatte wouldn't know the difference.
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...but it was shot down as being too "KILL BILL". Besides, they knew of the years I'd spent in India making dark sacrafices to Kali and studying the art of the death-like trance from crazed Yogi Anbubu. I suggested they draw and quarter me using riding lawn mowers but they told me to shut up, which hurt my feelings. Finally, I mixed up a batch of my famed Margaritas (the secret ingredient is toxic)and we sort of started arguing about who created what, Stan or Jack.
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But now he's just a talkbacker, all his powers are gone.
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...the Stinger!
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I'd expect nothing less of you
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and when did the assholes turn into a messed up version of fight club?
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just saying is all
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LAST!
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Sorry, guys. I admit my error. Once again I strive for ultimacy - in perfection this time.
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last i be
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while I post LAST!
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it is not the langauge of LAST!...which i know of.
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and for me to post LAST!
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especially overcrosses...er...LAST.
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