Hi, everyone. "Moriarty" here with some Rumblings From The Lab...

Nicolas Lopez is a perfect example of a geek made good, and his film PROMEDIO ROJO marks an impressive debut by a fresh comic voice.

I should also add that Nicolas Lopez is a dirty, dirty boy.

I read Harry’s review after he saw the film at SXSW this year, and as much as I could tell how enthusiastic he was, he actually turned me off a little bit. After all, Harry’s the author of that infamous stomach-turning BLADE 2 review, and that’s nothing compared to how foul he can be in private conversation. His obvious delight at how dirty the film was scared me. I pictured some sort of PINK FLAMINGOS/Tubgirl/Rotten.com meltdown, the kind of film that would send you running for a shower right after.

And although I would agree that PROMEDIO ROJO is blisteringly scatological at times, this is a sweet-natured film, a movie that takes the pain of adolescence and transforms it into something joyous and honest. Fans of vintage John Hughes movies and fans of Kevin Smith alike are going to fall for this one, but don’t think this is just some pastiche of obvious influences or some carbon copy. Lopez has a genuine voice, and he deserves a chance to show his film to as wide an audience as possible.

Friday night, in San Diego, he’ll have a chance to show this film to an audience perfectly suited to understanding it. 11:00 PM – 1:00 AM, in room 6B, they’ll be screening it, and you owe it to yourself to check it out. This is geek poetry, the teen movie as therapy, and it’ll hit close to home for many of you. I wish Lopez was going to be there to see the reaction from the crowd. Part of what made the DGA screening I went to so much fun was watching Lopez handle the introduction and the Q&A afterwards. It’s no wonder Guillermo Del Toro fell in love with this movie. Lopez is like Del Toro 2.0, and he injected the proceedings with an outrageousness that left the audience in tears, helpless with laughter. My favorite moment came when someone stood up to ask the question, “It’s hard enough finding funding for an independent film in America, but how did you get the money to make this film in Chile?”

Lopez pretended to struggle with English for a moment, stammering, “Ummm... how do you say... do you know what a blow-job is? See, there are these people, they are called producers. And I meet one, and I say to him, ‘Hello, I am a filmmaker,’ and he say to me, ‘Oh, yes, I am a producer,’ and I say, ‘Can you give me some money?’ and he say, ‘Okay, go down.’” He then proceeded to act out the most graphic, filthy blow-job you can imagine, complete with wet finish right on his chin, much to the visible dismay of the poor bastard trying to moderate the Q&A.

Even if Nicolas isn’t there, the film will play on its own. I’m sure of it. The lead character, Roberto Rodriguez (Ariel Levy) is a comic-book fan, an overweight nerd with dreams of creating his own comics some day. He’s got two best friends, Condoro (Nicolas Martinez) and Papitas (Berta Muniz), and the three of them are at the ass-end of the high school food chain. When a beautiful new student transfers in from Spain, Roberto’s momentarily convinced that he actually has a chance with her because she asks him about a comic book he’s reading. No sooner does Christina (Xenia Tostada) get settled in than she finds herself the focus of the attention of Fele (Benjamin Vicuña), the school’s “sensitive guy” and King Pussyhound. I’ve got to give it up for Vicuña... this is one of the most accurate and nuanced portrayals of a high school douchebag that I’ve ever seen. He’s got his act down cold, and when he really lays it on, you can’t blame Christina for falling for it.

The rest of the film is basically all about Roberto pining for Christina and suffering as she and Fele become closer. It’s a fairly simple story that will remind anyone who grew up on ‘80s teen flicks of THE LAST AMERICAN VIRGIN to some extent. What makes it work, and what makes it special, is the way Lopez fills in the details. He’s willing to follow some truly silly digressions, but he also knows that he has to keep bringing things back to reality to make it count. One of the reasons I always held FAST TIMES AT RIDGEMONT HIGH as one of the best films about high school was because it seemed to be be deeply in tune with just how humiliating that particular time of your life can be. The classic scene with Judge Reinhold in the bathroom or the miserable moment where Jennifer Jason Leigh loses her cherry in the dugout... those moments are so real that they’re hard to watch, and Lopez goes for it in several major sequences. He may have made his film in Chile, but I’d imagine the film would play universally. Everyone who has ever suffered through higher education and puberty at the same time is going to relate to this one.

Technically, the film’s obviously low-budget, but it’s not artless. In fact, it’s pretty impressive, all things considered. I think Lopez is more confident with a camera his first time at bat than Kevin Smith was, and CLERKS fans have never held that film’s budget against it. PROMEDIO ROJO’s far more visually dynamic than last year’s breakout hit NAPOLEON DYNAMITE, too. I’m not sure who is going to finally pick this up for distribution here in the United States, but considering what a huge hit it was in Chile, and considering how much momentum Lopez seems to be picking up as he takes the film to new countries to show it, I’d wager someone will figure it out and release this thing soon. In the meantime, you lucky bastards who see it in San Diego are in for a great ride, as long as you can laugh through the painful tears of recognition. If I don’t cut out of San Diego early to get home to the baby (a distinct possibility), I may even sneak in to watch some of it with you. Until then...