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AICN COMICS! HOUSE OF M! JSA! HOUSEWIVES AT PLAY (that's right, we went there)! AND MUCH, MUCH MORE!!!
#8 | 7/7/05 | align=right> #4 |
(Click title to go directly to the review)
HOUSE OF M #3
BLOOD OF THE DEMON #5
HOUSEWIVES AT PLAY #14
DAREDEVIL VS. PUNISHER: MEANS & ENDS #1
JSA #75
OCEAN #6
GOTHAM CENTRAL #33
Indie Jones presents HEARTBREAK #1-3
Indie Jones presents COMICULTURE ANTHOLOGY
CHEAP SHOTS!
HOUSE O' M # 3
Written by Brian Michael Bendis
Art by Olivier Coipel
Published by Marvel
One Man Roundtable by Buzz Maverik
For months now, writer Brian Michael Bendis has been promising that HOUSE O' M # 3 will "split the internet."
Up until now, I've always replied, "Quit blocking my driveway! I swear I'm backing this H2 right up, I don't care who's in the way!"
Split the internet? I found that to be an odd comment, since either Mr. Bendis or Joe Quesada has always insisted that the internet is only made up of a dozen people. I wondered which six I'd be part of, and how we'd be broken up. Good Eggs vs. Bad Eggs? Do-Bee’s vs. Don't-Bee’s? Tastes Great’s vs. Less Filling’s? David Lee Roth-era Van Halen fans vs. Sammy Hagar-era Van Halen Fans?
For the record, although I've always dug Sam's solo stuff, I'm in the Roth camp when it comes to Van Halen.
After reading issue # 3 (as well as #1-2, I'm gonna talk about the series to date), I don't know if the internet was split, but I sure as hell was! Into five separate personalities. There's regular @$$hole Buzz (@B); Bendis Board Buzz (BBB); Professor Buzz (PB); Ambush Buzz (AB); and of course Troll Buzz (TB). Since our AICN Comics Roundtable Review of HOUSE O' M # 1 was such a beloved fan favorite, I've decided to gather these personalities for their own roundtable.
@B: Issue # 3 was the first issue of HOUSE O' M that I actually enjoyed. The other two had positive aspects but this one was the kind of story Mr. Bendis does very well! I've noticed in THE PULSE that when it comes to a hero frantically trying to track down a lead, BMB really has the ability to bring the reader into the emotion, tension, and yes, action!
PB: Piddle!
BBB: 30 pages of fights! You want 30 pages of fights! No one does fights any more! Fights are over! Fights are done! Even in the movies. I just saw Bruce Willis in DIE HARD 4: COFFEE WITH HANS. Not one fight! Or the new Michael Bay movie BAD BOYS 3: ARMAGEDDON HARBOR where Will Smith and Ben Affleck play two guys we can relate to while they relate to each other by talking through a Michael Bay movie. Even in novels, it's no fights! I'm currently reading WHINE CLUB by Chuck Palahniuk. It's got a great line: ..."the first rule of Whine Club is you talk all about Whine Club. The second rule of Whine Club is you talk all about Whine Club."
@B: Well, you know I'm an action fan and this issue had some well done, balls out scenes involving Wolverine. Mr. Coipel carried it off very well. As you know, I think it's stupid to just review an issue of a comic. I'm more interested in the effects on the medium. We've talked about the problem with action issues and, what, development issues being separate. I wish Mr. Bendis would allow himself to integrate them better. If you look at issue # 1, where the characters talk and talk and talk, they're not behaving heroically. They're behaving like the survivors in the refinery in THE ROAD WARRIOR or the townspeople in JAWS. Mr. Bendis needs to read some Joseph Campbell and bring in an Outsider hero who will decide a course and shut everyone up. Mad Max whistling and saying, "Two days ago, I saw a rig that could pull that tanker. You want to get out of here, you talk to me!" Or Quint, scratching the chalkboard and saying, "I'll find him for three. But I'll catch him and kill him for ten."
AB: Yakkety-yak, don't talk back. Achoo! Snort!
TB: Yer a punk! You responded to one of my posts in '03 and I've spent every waking moment despising you since then. And yer jealous of Bendis.
@B: Well, I can't speak for AB, but I'll bet my life is a lot like Mr. Bendis’. I'm jealous of people making big budget films, myself. Or even low budget films.
PB: Poop!
@B: To sum it up, I'm happier with the art in # 3 and I'm happier with the storytelling. It didn't have #1's blah-blahing or # 2's boring revelations. I kept thinking, okay, I get it.
BBB: You have ADHD. It's a build-up.
@B: Actually, I have ODD. I like to think I'm quick on the uptake. I don't need to be beat over the head with a concept. Issue # 2 was like, comics for slow learners. I admired Mr. Bendis' use of Marvel Universe characters in # 3, whom he chooses to make the heroes, how it unfolds. The whole concept is a little TOP TEN, ASTRO CITY and EARTH X for me, though. But I'm happy with the Big Revelation at the end.
AB: Beep-beep-n-beep-beep!
TB: Shall I quote one of your posts from October 3, 2004 for you in exquisite detail, Ambush Buzz?
PB: Dookie! Moo! Logs! Loaves! Fecal materi--
And that's a wrap! Now, to knit my super-ego back together with that rain forest drug that induces blindness.
BLOOD OF THE DEMON #5
Plotter: John Byrne
Writer: Will Pfeiffer
Artists: John Byrne/Nekros (urgh - can Bud La Rosa cut that out?)
Publisher: DC Comics
Reviewer: Prof. Challenger
You know, a Byrne cover used to be something that jazzed me up when I saw it. Now, I cringe. His progressive elimination of nearly all shading makes even his finished work look almost like layouts only. The cover to BLOOD OF THE DEMON #5 is no exception. A little dramatic shading or blacks would help give some weight to this cover. Geez. Batman and the other little folk running for their lives on the ground don't even cast shadows – giving them that "floating in space" look. Superman's body position is all wonky (I have NO clue where his left leg is but his right leg is contorted in such a way that the angle on the bottom of his boot is just not right). Wonder Woman's proportions are all off making her butt look like she goes from an adult head down to a 12 year-old's derriere with adult legs attached. And what's up with her bracelets? Her left bracelet is smoothly solid and her right bracelet has suddenly got 3 sections to it? Etrigan looks okay but he's also suffering from missing leg syndrome. Guh. Looks like something whipped out as a sketch but that he never bothered to go back and evaluate or even tighten up in the ink stage.
However, then I open the book up and Byrne's drawing is suddenly back to normal (at least his current "normal.") Maybe the fact that DC has been utilizing professional inkers for his interiors has helped. I'm thinking they need to start hiring inkers for his covers too. However, even the improved interiors suffer from some of his recently patented wonkiness. For example, that awkward right arm and hand of Superman on the splash page, the oddly flat, cardboard-cut-out look of Batman on page 2 and the "uh oh I'm falling asleep while I'm walking" pose of Wonder Woman on page 3. Even a good inker doesn't seem to be able to fix that. But, one thing I liked throughout the whole book was Byrne's background work. Yeah, Jason Blood's apartment looked really good as did Gotham City - especially as Batman, Wonder Woman, and Superman were flitting through the sky with Det. Kinkaid.
Internal continuity confusing moment for me was that I've re-read and re-read that last page and I still can't figure out what happened to cause Morgaine Le Fey to explode into dust. And beyond that, everyone's matter-of-fact attitude about it made no sense to me either. You'd think that if you're on a public street and some weirdo causes an old woman to explode that this would cause some kind of reaction other than a calm: "Is that it, Jason? Is that the END of Morgaine Le Fey?"
BLOOD OF THE DEMON is a confusing guilty pleasure for me. The crappy covers contrast with pretty decent storytelling art interiors. The blatant rip-off elements from ANGEL and BUFFY make me cringe a bit - especially the fact that Jason Blood now looks like he's played by David Boreanaz. However, there is such a goofy and gross little charm to this series that I'm having fun reading it. In a lot of ways, my level of enjoyment of BLOOD OF THE DEMON is similar to the feelings I had back when I was but a wee lad and Jack Kirby's BLACK PANTHER series kicked off. I still own that whole brief but oddly fun run. The difference here is that BLACK PANTHER was shocking in its oblivious corniness (King Solomon's Frog? The Black Musketeers?). BLOOD OF THE DEMON is confusing because of the tension brought out by equal parts utter frustration or irritation mixed with silly, self-aware fun. Don't know the sales on the series, but I suspect it's not selling too well. I pretty much expect it to be one of the first on the chopping block for the post INFINITE CRISIS cancelled comic cavalcade, but you never know. It's kind of weird and if you like weird, you might like BLOOD OF THE DEMON.
HOUSEWIVES AT PLAY #14
Rebecca: Writer/Artist
Eros Comix: Publisher
Vroom Socko: Cunt-Crazy Slut
Oh good lord, it’s a filler issue. You spend all this time emotionally invested in the story of Cathy, Lynn, and the rest of the housewives, and now we get a story that would seem more at home in the sister book Hot Moms. It’s not like this book is a monthly, and I was really looking forward to seeing more of Cathy and Melissa.
Which is not to say that this issue wasn’t great.
Audrey Rittenhouse is all set to enjoy six wonderful weeks in Paris with her family, a special treat to celebrate her daughter Nicole’s high school graduation. It’s only too bad that Nicole is failing art and needs to take a summer class to get her diploma. Audrey, who is seething at the news, decides to confront her daughter’s art teacher, one Miss Hillary Watson. And of course, one thing leads to another…
Rebecca’s work features, among other things, an exceptional command of visual narrative. Her layouts and panel composition are some of her greatest assets, second only to her command of anatomy. There is no one working in comics today that draws better women than Rebecca. No one. The standout female this issue is Nicole, who almost looks ready to walk right off the page.
As to the story, well, it’s really as simple as it needs to be, and to tell any more than I already have would spoil things. It’s not as complex and detailed as the last few issues have been, but since it’s a self-contained story it really doesn’t need to be. It is what it is, and doesn’t try to be more, which nowadays comes as a relief.
So yeah, this issue is certainly worth reading. If you’re into this sort of thing, that is. But Rebecca, please bring back Cathy and friends for the next issue. I’ve grown to like those ladies.
What? Just because it’s porn doesn’t mean you can’t take the work seriously.
DAREDEVIL VS. PUNISHER: MEANS & ENDS #1
Written & Drawn by David Lapham
Published by Marvel
You Will Be Pissed Off by Buzz Maverik
Every now and then, I get a hankering to read a DAREDEVIL story. But what am I going to do? Read DAREDEVIL, which seems to be about people talking about Daredevil? That's like going to see LETHAL WEAPON 5 and getting this:
(they laugh)
you like better? Rene Russo or Patsy Kensit?
Maybe if we were lucky, Mel and Danny would make cameos as assistants to Carl the Janitor; and Gary Busey would show up as a school board member.
DAREDEVIL minis are a toss up. The recent DAREDEVIL: REDEMPTION had me e-mailing Quesada begging him to pay Bendis whatever he wants to stay on Daredevil just so the mini writer wouldn't be considered.
But writer/artist David Lapham should be a leading contender for the reins of DD if he wants the job, based on DAREDEVIL VS. PUNISHER # 1. This is the second week in a row Marvel has blessed us with the debut of a superior series, the last being X-MEN: KITTY PRYDE, SHADOW & FLAME.
The Punisher is gunning for Hammerhead, a Spider-Man villain who is out to take over organized comic book crime. In the coolest of cools, Frank learns that Hammerhead is advised by another Spidey villain (actually a guy who was sort of two Spidey villains), who has ties to the Punisher's earliest appearance. Too bad that Daredevil has to show up, throwing his billy club. The Punisher says that DD is a boy. We know he's wrong on that account. DD has always been one of the few Marvel characters that read like a full fledged adult.
The bulk of the book belongs to the Punisher as he establishes his priorities and protects a family from a gang. He encounters a young woman who bears a striking resemblance to his late wife Maria. Frank doubtlessly doesn't know what the mystery Spidey villain was up to all those years ago, but many of us do.
Man, David Lapham! He created a comic called STRAY BULLETS, which I haven't had the pleasure of reading. Here's a guy who should be given the jobs of both writing and drawing DAREDEVIL and PUNISHER comics. He gets it right. He knows who these guys are. It's all in service of the story. No black humor. No posing.
As an artist, Mr. Lapham is perfect for this story and these characters. From an early BLUE VELVET reference, through some fine comic book noir scenes, he shows us the world through Frank Castle's eyes without ever condescending to us by telling us that we're seeing the world through Frank Castle's eyes.
Honestly, I haven't enjoyed Daredevil or the Punisher as much in years as I did in DAREDEVIL VS. PUNISHER: MEANS & ENDS # 1.
JSA #75
Geoff Johns: Writer
Don Kramer, Leonard Kirk, & Stephen Sadowski: Artists
DC Comics: Publisher
Vroom Socko: Good Guy
Man, when the best superhero team book on the shelves has an anniversary issue, it doesn’t fuck around. The Spectre has brought hell to Kahndaq, the home of Black Adam. The whole of the JSA is now trapped between these two; both former teammates, both powerful, both dangerous as all hell.
While this arc is technically a tie-in with DAY OF VENGEANCE, (one of those big DC event miniseries I’m not reading,) the story manages to stand on its own rather satisfactorily. The lone exception being Jean Loring, who’s apparently now become Eclipso. (Like I said, I’m not reading that mini.) So the love interest of a classic JLA member has gone insane and is being powered by a mystical jem. Just like Star Sapphire, only Goth. Meh. I’ve never liked the “crazy” villains, to be honest. They just don’t work for me. Now Black Adam, on the other hand…
Fuck, bad guys like Black Adam scare the living shit out of me. Here’s a guy who’s not only all-powerful, he’s the equivalent of the JSA’s most powerful member. He’s a killer, a despot, a tyrant. And he believes with all his being in the rightness of what he is doing, that his cause is just. Now that is a villain. I’m talking Dr. Doom style villainy here, the best kind of bad guy.
But the real star of this issue is the Atom Smasher. From the beginning of this title, he’s the character who’s gone through the most. We’ve seen him at his best, and then fall to his darkest, joining Black Adam in his violent conquest of Kahndaq. With this issue, he finds his redemption in what just might be the best moment this book has ever seen.
SPOILERS, BITCHES!
Man oh man, Johns has written a book that will become the gold standard of superhero demise. Every note behind Al’s choice is perfection incarnate. Hell, it’s a moment that’s been building for the book’s entire run, and the execution is all that I could have hoped for and more. It’s everything a reader could want from a moment of personal sacrifice. This is how a hero should die. (Oh what the hell, HAWKEYE LIVES, MOTHERFUCKER!)
END SPOILERS
This book is always the high point of my DC reading. For those of you who haven’t been able to get into this book for whatever reason, or for those readers who’ve dropped the book, give this issue a look-see. It’s gold, I tell you. Gold.
OCEAN #6
Writer: Warren Ellis
Artists: Chris Sprouse/Karl Story
Publisher: Wildstorm
Reviewer: Prof. Challenger
Grrr. I hate late books. Check this out – Cover dates for the OCEAN series go like this: #1 = Dec, #2 = Jan, #3 = Feb, #4 = (woops - skipped a month) Apr, #5 = (back on track) May, #6 = (what the @#$%^&?) Sep. Grrr. But I digress already. On with the review.
Why was OCEAN a cool series? I can think of a couple of reasons. You know, I have a fondness for fiction and science-fiction particularly - especially good old-fashioned serialized novels and novellas like I used to get buying ANALOG or FANTASY & SCIENCE-FICTION off the newsstands. Well, OCEAN is essentially a pure sci-fi graphic novella serialized over 6 issues of a comic book. Another thing, OCEAN has art by Chris Sprouse and that's a strong draw for the Prof since I'm not getting Sprouse regularly in TOM STRONG anymore.
Storywise, OCEAN is a story set 100 years in the future and involves a surprising discovery deep in the oceans of Jupiter's moon, Europa. There are an uncountable number of sarcophagi floating underneath the frozen surface of Europa along with this giant Stargate-looking thing. And the sarcophagi look to be inhabited by disturbingly human-looking individuals who appear to be in a state of suspended animation.
The main character of the story is cut from a frequent Warren Ellis character-type, the smart-alec tough-talking serious badass. This one's name is Nathan Kane. He's some kind of United Nations Special Weapons Inspector with a license to kick ass with impunity. Seems a hundred years from now they give UN Inspectors a "license to kill," require all police services to cooperate, and give them system-wide immunity (covering Earth, the moon, Mars, and elsewhere). He also kind of looks like he could be played in a movie quite well by a buffed up Don Cheadle.
The main antagonist to the story is DOORS. DOORS is a satire of MICROSOFT where all the employees have their personalities shut off for the duration of their work contract and a company-approved template is downloaded with a hook-up directly into the company intranet. So basically, it's Stepford Wives, Bill Gates-style, in the twisted conspiratorial future of Warren Ellis. The manager of the DOORS installation above Europa winds up in conflict with Kane and his team of specialists out there investigating the discovery in the ocean.
DOORS wants to tap into the computer systems controlling the sarcophagi to download the info and make bazillions of dollars. Kane and company want to figure out if there is any kind of weapons-related threat that needs to be dealt with. What Kane finds out leads into the events of issue 6. Turns out that the Stargate-thing, they call it the Torus, well - it really IS a Stargate-thing. It's huge enough for a starship to fly through and it creates wormholes that will instantly navigate the starship to one of a number of these Torus jumpgates throughout the solar system. One of them just a quarter-million miles from Earth.
However, Kane's team is able to tap into one of the sarcophagi and download a video journal that gives them clear insight into these beings and whether they might be considered a threat. Millions of years ago, they used these Torus gates to jump back and forth between other planets and the safety of their own planet. Their purpose was to destroy the surfaces of the other planets. For example, we see the actual footage of them destroying a once-robust Mars. They also, for reasons known only to them, seeded Earth which makes us their direct descendants. These beings are a complete warrior culture at war with all other species and even with themselves. Civil war destroyed their homeworld which used to lie between Jupiter and Mars. Millions of survivors have floated asleep deep in the oceans of Europa for eons. And now, the Torus has powered up and the sarcophagi have been triggered. They are waking up and they look like vampires.
This final issue wraps the story neatly with Kane and his team creatively escaping from the DOORS manager and plunging their flying saucer deep into the ocean to accomplish two goals - utilize the Torus to jump to the Torus out near Earth and, hopefully, blow those friggin' vampire-people to hell before they can wake up and come destroy us.
The covers of issues 1 and 6 are bookends. Issue 1 shows Jupiter from the perspective of the frozen surface of Europa with the bottom half a close-up of an eerily human-looking face peacefully sleeping inside a sarcophagus. Issue 6 shows Earth from the perspective of the dead surface of our moon with the bottom half a close-up of the scary vampire face with his glowing yellow eyes open and his mouth snarled open in a fang-filled cry of hunger surrounded by glowing fire and electricity! Aaaaaah!
The layout of the entire series was, artistically, very attractive and geometric. The page grid was based usually on a 5-panel full-width horizontal layout. Now Sprouse did not obsessively adhere to that layout, but it was definitely the prevailing choice for story-telling resulting in a "widescreen" feel to the whole series - almost like storyboards for a movie.
OCEAN was not the most original thing I've read in awhile. It's not one of those "Oh my god I can't believe it" surprises. But, it was solid, professional, pulp-style sci-fi, and that is just not very common in comics. I liked it and I've recommended the series to a number of people. I'm sure the trade collection's not far away and I'll recommend that to anyone who prefers trades. However, you can still pick up the entire series at cover price for about what you'd pay for a TPB and not have to wait. I mean, the whole series only cost $19. Not too bad. Check it out.
GOTHAM CENTRAL #33
Writers: Greg Rucka and Ed Brubaker
Penciller: KANO
Publisher: DC Comics
Reviewed by Humphrey Lee
It’s the triumphant return of Ed Brubaker!!!!
Well, sort of…
This latest issue of Gotham Central sees the “return” of former co-writer and co-creator of GOTHAM CENTAL, Ed Brubaker, for a story entitled “Dead Robin.” Apparently somewhere close to a year ago, Misters Brubaker and Rucka brainstormed this little tale before Bru’s departure from the book, and DC Comics in general, to go work on some stuff for Marvel exclusively. So after a couple months of Rucka going solo we are now treated to the official “last hurrah” of one of the best writing pairs I’ve seen in a long time. And I have to say, I’m glad to have him back, even only temporarily.
The premise of this arc is simply what the title implies: a young man in his mid-teens is found dead in a Gotham alleyway, but with the twist of his being dressed like and physically matching what information is had on the city’s resident Boy Wonder, and Batman’s sidekick, Robin. And, obviously, since nothing is known about Robin outside of the Bat family, except maybe some photos or possible television footage, the starring police officers of the GCPD have no choice but to assume, for the time being, that their corpse is in fact the real deal. And the investigation is on…
Really, I don’t know exactly what Brubaker’s contribution to this story is as far as being an official co-writer, or just a consultant, or what, but it’s noticeable. While Rucka’s previous, and only, solo arc on this book was in itself very good, this already feels much more crisp. Great dialogue and fresh ideas just flow forth so naturally from this issue. It’s very entertaining to watch as the investigating officers start to run down all the possibilities… Is this really Robin, or is it just some kid who dressed up as the Boy Wonder? Hell, is there even more than one Robin? Did he fall off a rooftop by accident and die? Or was he thrown off the building by one of his villains? Or, even more insidious, is Batman somehow responsible? We watch with great zeal as the GCPD look for answers, and we catch come brutal glimpses of the Batman’s own little personal investigation. And it all converges into a great little cliffhanger that I really had no idea to even expect.
And as the quality of writing has noticeably improved, so has the art. Ever since the departure of Michael Lark, also to Marvel, from this title, it has been very apparent that DC has been looking for someone with a similar style to take the reins. Well, it seems they’ve found it in a duo of artists. Former HERO Penciller KANO has taken over the primary art, with Stefano Gaudiano (who was used as a temporary Penciller for this title) inking his art. The result is a style that definitely harkens to Lark’s pencils, but doesn’t try to plagiarize it.
This issue immediately renews my belief that this is DC’s best mainline title. Though it has to be said, one of the book’s best qualities is also the one that might make this otherwise great jumping on point somewhat inaccessible, that being the characters. This book sports some of the most unique and colorful characters in comics today, but they have become so well established in this book that for new readers not exposed to previous GOTHAM CENTRAL stories, trying to get a grasp on them all may make this read jarring. But if you think you can adjust to that quickly, then there’s really no reason why you shouldn’t be buying this book.
HEARTBREAK #1-3
By Jonathan Rivera and Nick Destefano
Reviewed by Ambush Bug
Alright guys, let's face it. If you're on this site and reading this column, chances are you were at some point, and maybe still are, a geek. It's not a put down. Not a snipe. Just a simple, ugly fact. I know that throughout my high school and college years, if I were a hit with the ladies, I wouldn't have spent so much time reading comics. Or maybe if I wouldn't have spent so much time reading comics during that time, I would have got a little more than I did. Who knows? My point is that with all of the "strengths" the geek culture has going for it – large egos, overactive imaginations, a great memory of unimportant factuals – livin’ large with the ladies ain't one that we're known for.
It's a hard fact to swallow. I know and I'm sure the TBs will be filled with those in denial, stating, "I don't know about your geek @$$, but I get laid all of the time." To that, I say, "No. No, you don't. No one really does. Only in the movies do guys go out on a consistent basis and get laid and pick up girls as many times as I piss on a three day drinking binge." And I'm not saying this from the standpoint of a guy who never gets some. Oh, the Bug gets some. I do and that patting sound is me stretching my arm back to congratulate myself. But the thing is, I'm willing to admit that at my core, there's a geek. That person that is not so confident. That person who makes himself look like a complete jack@$$. That person who over thinks their actions before they do them and is haunted by said actions long after they do or don't happen. I know I'm not the only one.
If you're honest with yourself and strong enough to admit it, HEARTBREAK is the comic made for all of us. The endearing thing about this comic is that these romantic misadventures are looked back upon with a heavy dose of insight, a wizened viewpoint brought on only by years and years of taking chances, making mistakes, and learning from them. Creators Jonathan Rivera and Nick Destefano are able to look back at the times when they have struck out with the ladies, not in anger or melancholy, but with the humble attitude that without these experiences, they would not be the people that they are today.
The thing is, if you're a geek – and we've already established that in some way or another, we all are – your experiences with the opposite sex may not be frequent, but they are memorable. Memorable because as geeks, we think way too much. Memorable because they don't happen that often and when they do, they stick with us. Memorable because, for a moment or two, that gripe you had with the way Wolverine was portrayed in issue #33 or that flame war you had in the Talkbacks ceases to matter and life suddenly becomes more real than usual. And that’s what HEARTBREAK is all about.
On a girl by girl basis, HEARTBREAK tells the story of two guys who have tried over and over to find that one girl for them. Each issue is split in two, with each story narrated by Rivera or Destefano. Although the art is often simplistic, both Destefano and Rivera show promise in their use of framing sequences, telling stories graphically, and their use of simple lines to convey facial features and emotion. In issue #1, like a geeked-out Rod Serling, Jonathan Rivera (circa now) takes us on a trip down memory lane, stopping at each time he comes into contact with a potential girlfriend and telling us how each connection went horribly, horribly wrong. In a later story, Nick Destefano tells us how he goes through an elaborate plan in order to get a girl who is out of his league in high school. Destefano and Rivera are two types of geeks. Rivera is the outcast rebel-type, who shuns mainstream trends and operates on the outside of the cool crowds at school (but secretly wants to be a part of it). Destefano is more of the shy nebbish-type. Both are lovable losers and you see yourselves rooting for these guys to be successful in their pursuit of love and cringe when you see the situation take a turn for the worse.
So check out HEARTBREAK. You can order copies of the first three issues right here. These books speak to the geek in all of us, even if you're not willing to admit it. I had a lot of fun reading about these guys’ experiences and comparing them to my own. I'll bet you will to. These stories are empowering in a way. These guys have made mistakes, but they seem to be coming to terms with them in these stories. This series is a brutally honest read, but the ups and downs with the opposite sex in these tales are inspiring in that these guys are learning from their mistakes and not giving up despite them. So take this Bug's advice. Order a copy of HEARTBREAK. Read it and maybe you’ll learn from the experiences of these lovable losers. Then put the comic down, turn off the computer, go outside, and take some chances of your own.
COMICULTURE ANTHOLOGY
Writers: Various
Artists: Various
Publisher: Comiculture Books
Reviewer: Prof. Challenger
Short but sweet. Let me give a shout out to the folks who produced COMICULTURE ANTHOLOGY and got a copy into my hands. This really brought back some long-buried memories of that phase in my life (my first summer with spending money) when I was buying just about any comic I could get my hands on. This was during the time when Eclipse and Pacific Comics were kicking butts in the newly growing direct sales market. That's when I got my hands on those early ELFQUEST comics and discovered FRED HEMBECK's collections and THE JUSTICE MACHINE and MR. A. I was just devouring all these different artistic stylings and perspectives. It was such a thrill every time I found another new comic I'd never heard of before.
I love anthologies. They're a dying form out there in literature and comicland though. So, when I got my hands on this collection, I tore right into it and, yes, I loved it. So many different styles and perspectives. They organize the different stories according to genre. So you have, say, a "Romance" story followed by a "Horror" story followed by an "Adventure" story and so on. The artistic stylings range from full-on cartoon to standard realistic comic book illustration to painted realism. I laughed, I smiled, and was even touched. My favorite story "Sin of the Wolf", by Don Hudson and Vince Evans, is very poignant AND ACCOMPLISHED IT ALL IN JUST 8 PAGES! My second favorite story was the autobiographical "Jambo, I'll Have Your Money Now or A Week in Nairobi" written by Marie Javins and illustrated by Don Hudson. I was also particularly fond of "Suffer the Salt" and "Clarissa: Down the Rabbit Hole." Probably my least favorite story was "The Prune" which chronicled one adventure of a crazy old flatulent geezer who thinks he inherited some kind of superpowers from an irradiated prune. Funnier in concept than in execution, but a minor quibble. It was still a fun contribution to the mix. Even the cover, which features King Kong peaking in the window at a sexy blonde reading Comiculture carries over into the anthology as the first panel of a continuing gag that ends on the last page.
Here's the thing. The Prof is a big supporter of those mavericks out there who are trying to make their way in the comics biz. As long as the work is topnotch, I will encourage all my readers to support the independents and the small press. The more that the big 2 or 3 corporatize and sanitize and sodomize, the more these indies become the only legitimate sources for true artistic experimentation and expression. Check out the squarebound COMICULTURE ANTHOLOGY. You can order direct from their website for $11.95 - where you can also educate yourself on the background of COMICULTURE - where they came from and where they're going. Or better yet, if you're attending the San Diego Comicon this week, go by the COMICULTURE booth and pick up your anthology and meet the creators face to face. Tell them Professor Challenger sent you and "DON'T SHOOT THE COMICS!"
Remember, if you have an Indie book you’d like one of the @$$holes to take a look at, click on your favorite reviewer’s link and drop us an email.
Remember, if you have an Indie book you’d like one of the @$$holes to take a look at, click on your favorite reviewer’s link and drop us an email.
VILLAINS UNITED #3 (of 6)
After the first issue of this series, I was more than a little wary. The focus was on the few villains who WEREN'T united! And besides, the idea of every bad guy in the DCU, no matter how varied their style of criminal motive, being in one big gang just feels so 1970's Legion of Doom-ish. Thankfully, this issue addresses that disparity with some truly magnificent character moments with Talia and Black Adam. Then there's some of the funniest moments Gail Simone has written in ages, especially the moment on page three. That sucker had me rolling.Besides, everyone knows that Deadshot is a helluva lot cooler than Deathstroke. - Vroom
INCREDIBLE HULK #83
One of the things that made Peter David’s previous run on the INCREDIBLE HULK was the imaginative variations of the situations that David would throw the Hulk and Banner into. From Las Vegas enforcer to head of the Pantheon, like no other, Peter David was able to prove that the Hulk was a true icon, able to adapt and be interesting whatever the concept. In this issue, we find Banner spending time with a tribe of Australian Aborigines in search of inner peace between his two selves. And he’s found it and seems to be quite happy for the first time in…well…forever. Of course, happiness is a fleeting thing in the rage-ridden world of the Hulk and soon an army of mutants are on the scene to disrupt the peace. This issue is part of the big HOUSE OF M crossover, but if you put up the blinders, it shouldn’t bother you that it is associated with that crap. Look at this as yet another interesting take on the Hulk by the only person who seems able to write the character well and you’ll be able to get through it. I’m interested to see where David is going with this new run on the Hulk. So far, David’s first arc proved that he still has a few quality Hulk tales up his sleeve. - Bug
SUPERMAN #219
I’m just not feeling it. Just three issues into Mark Verheiden’s run on Superman and I already feel left in the cold. Last issues fracas with Blackrock, and Superman’s over-aggressiveness in taking him down just really didn’t grab me as a strong premise for a story. And now this issue is the kick off of a storyline that will not only be running through all of Supes’ books, but WONDER WOMAN and THE OMAC PROJECT as well. Starting the storyline, this issue involves Superman coming into a “conflict” with Brainiac that is all but definitely not real, and just meant to get into Superman’s head a bit, and soften him up for the next in line to take him on as he runs the gauntlet through all of this Sacrifice arc. And it’s all done in such an over-the-top way that it’s almost a bit laughable. And I don’t think Ed Benes is a good fit with Superman. While Benes is a great artist and does some really good work with Supes in action here, as soon as there’s a female on the page the first thing that pops into my mind is “cheesecake” and it really is kinda out of place here. All said, I don’t think I’m on this ride for much longer… - Humphrey
NORTHWEST PASSAGE #1
It's official. Oni is incapable of publishing a digest book that sucks. Scott Chantler's story of high adventure in the 1750's American frontier is a whole lotta fun. It's got warrior Indians, French pirates, spiritual visions, and a bookish tenderfoot finding himself in dire peril. And that's all with the main character never leaving the trading post. Oh yeah, Oni's got another winner here. - Vroom
FANTASTIC FOUR: HOUSE OF M #1
IRON MAN: HOUSE OF M #1
These “What if Bendis took over all of the Marvel Universe and called it a Summer Event?” spin-offs are just plain awful. These fluff books are just alternate universe/Elseworlds tales where the only “kick” a reader gets from the read is seeing Tony Stark resort to drinking again because of his condescending father and Doc Doom leading the Fantastic Four. There’s nothing in these books that is more interesting than the last few issues of a WHAT IF? run. You know the ones. The stories that are published when all of the other good WHAT IF? concepts have been run through for the umpteenth time. To add insult to injury, Doom is wearing the same type of organic-style armor he wears in the FF movie. Bad idea there and bad idea here. Oh and Reed has been turned into this alternate universe’s version of The Thing, this time called The It. Blow your nose into a Kleenex and look at it. It’s much more interesting than these two wastes of my time and yours. - Bug It’s the Talkback Question of the Week!?!?!?
What's the most overrated comic on the stands? The most underrated?
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+ Expand All
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Jul 13, 2005 1:39:41 PM CDT
screen. Working on a remedy so you don't have this hassle in
by aint_it_cruel?
It. Blow your nose into a Kleenex and look at it. It
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neato
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was enjoyed by me. But maybe that's becuase I had such low hopes after the terrible, terrible, awful House of M Spidey-Man.
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Ok, I finally got around to reading this, and I got to ask: why is it popular? It wasn't very good, in my opinion. Part of my problem is probably that I'm not a huge DC fan, but I enjoyed the hell out of Kingdom Come, so why couldn't I enjoy this? I guess my main criticisms are: how many times can one villain die? Why are people taking this so well? And run that formation of the antimatter universe by me one more time?
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Jul 13, 2005 2:16:49 PM CDT
I don't see Black Adam as an all out villain...and (insert J
by superhero
SPOILERS
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Just figured I'd ask...I'll be there just for Saturday...
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Serenity #1 is out today.
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It is popular for 2 reasons. (1) The artwork is solid George Perez goodness. (2) The storyline was actually innovative 20 years ago when it was first published. You have to put it into the context of the 1985 comic book world to truly appreciate it. The poor thing's been ripped off so many times in the last two decades that the original story now seems stale.
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I know it sounds pretty silly, considering what the Spectre did to him and all, but I got the impression that Al was still alive at the end of the issue. I agree, though, that this was a standout issue of the best superhero book (team or otherwise) coming out right now, written by the best superhero writer, Mr. Johns. I've heard rumor that Geoff Johns is taking over a Superman book next year. Maybe it'll be "the" Superman book from Verheiden...
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Call me crazy, but I'd like to read an actual review in the Reviews section, not some tangential, silly-ass piece that goes nowhere near the promised discussions about the series thus far and the nature of comics. Things are touched on, but not argued very well. Let's stop trying to be so clever with the reviews and actually write the review.
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pathetic, huh ?
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Can't wait to read Serenity either. As for the ? of the week. I think The Gift is overrated and
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Jul 13, 2005 2:42:36 PM CDT
You start reviewing porn comics and you review "Housewives at pl
by rickslamu2
As a porn comic coinsure I can tell you with 100% certainty that there are PC with better stories than
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Superhero, while I see your point, I don't see Black Adam as getting the hero of the year either. I think Adam's biggest flaw is his inflated ego and his sense that he is better than others. he feels that because he is better than others, what he believes is right is the only way. And he's not afraid to use his powers to enforce that way. This makes him a pretty scary antagonist because he firmly believes that he is right and will do just about anything to make support that. He'll kill. He'll overthrow governments. He'll sacrifice others and at the end of the day, he'll sleep soundly because he thinks what he is doing is right. The guy doesn't even soil his shoes by placing his feet on the earth. He floats above everyone. Those are the qualities of an antagonist that truly scares me. I guess antagonist fits Black Adam better than villain though since he represents something the JSA is against.
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Rebecca
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Atom Smasher is brought back, but then again he DOES technically die for a minute there. Besides, it's such a great moment, I didn't want to spoil it for anyone who hadn't yet picked up the book. As for Black Adam, he's a villain as far as I'm concerned. What makes him a great villain, though, is everything you just detailed. The absolute best bad guys are the ones with a noble streak to them, and Adam's got that in spades.
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For all of the bitching from @$$Holes and talkbackers about Bendis' proclivity for writing and writing where nothing happens, it's amazing how often this useless roundtable gimmick gets played. If it's stupid to just review an issue of a comic, then save us all the time and write nothing.
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Good review of House of M #3. I think what a lot of people seem to miss is this book isn't monthly, and like it or not, that means the book can get away with a "decompressed" story. While #1 and #2 may have been bad, its hardly noticable at this point. Compare the first 3 issues of House of M with say, the first 3 issues of the last 100 bullets arc (wylie runs the voodoo). I was almost ready to drop one of my all time favorite titles, or at the very least wait for trades from here on out. It took 6 bloody months to tell a story that could have been told in 3 issues. Most overrated comic is Walking Dead. Most underated is oddly enough probably Ultimes vol 2.
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Amen back at you. Thing is, I clicked on that link excited to read a review of House of M because I am 1) a Bendis fan and 2) a House of M fan. I pretty much expected a negative review (as always), but instead I got nothing. I got hints that Buzz had read the book, but where the hell is the discourse? I thought the folks who regularly submit for this site are supposed to incite discussion, not shit on the idea of it.
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House of M--So predictable it will break the internet in half
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We actually had a request in the Talkbacks a few weeks back to review HAP, so I went ahead and ran with it. Also, I'll have to agree with you that Rebecca's best work is in her artbooks. Man Rebecca is talented. She draws the best titties...
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Jul 13, 2005 3:04:41 PM CDT
I see your point bug...I never said he was a "Hero" though...
by superhero
Trust me, I'm not saying Black Adam is a hero at all. Just that I don't buy him as a horrifying super-villain. While I see all your points and think you are correct on every one I also think that what Adam was fighting for was, in its own way
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I still can't figure out why you think you are funny or clever, Buzz. Rest of the reviews are A-OK.
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Jul 13, 2005 3:12:16 PM CDT
Ok, HoM Iron Man is pretty frickin' bad, but Hom F4 was enjo
by tall_boy
C'mon, Doom kicking the "It" while ranting about the mutant trash running the world? That shit was fun.
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Mary Jane....
Im not kidding. -
Anything that Michael Turner touches.
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For being considered being Teen Titans copies...which is WAY FAR FROM BEING TRUE....give this couple books a chance........do it for Pedro!
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I think the worst thing Adam did in this arc was that he guilted Atom Smasher into returning to Kandaq even after he clearly stated that he wanted another chance with the JSA. That's how the JSA got involved in this thing this time around. Originally, in the BLACK REIGN sotry, the JSA went over there to get Black Adam out because they felt it was their responsibility because one of their own had overthrown a government (Black Adam was actually a part of the JSA at that point). But in this arc, it was much mroe personal, because Adam basically stole Atom Smasher out from under their noses. The biggest act of villainy Adam did in this arc was that he forced someone who he thought of as a friend into doing something that he was against. It was a tragic and complex story and shows how good of a writer Geoff Johns is becuase I felt sorry for all of the characters in this one.
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Well than i can't lauff in mock desgust for HWAP being the first PC you ever reviewed. As For Most Underrated and overated? Under: THe Asskickingly fun yet hardly ever talked about Adam Warren Mini "Livewires" Over: Without a doubt "Idenity Crisis" Atom's EX-Wife goes on a Killing spree so he will spend more time with her?!?! Take out the superhero elements and here you have the plot/storyline for a bad primetime soap opra!!!!
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Buzz is not really clever. Or if he is, it's not showing. I remember reading this review of New Avengers that i loved where the reviewer said he'd discuss the bad first and then he'd get to the good part. And in the end there was no good part and he said that's what NA felt like. That was clever, this "roundtable" shit could've been reduced to the @B comments alone and it would've said the same goddamn thing. And yet they bitch about decompression. As to the question of the week: How the hell should i know? Oh and i'm a geek with a pretty girlfriend and have been for the past year and a half...i get laid constantly so maybe the theory could use some reworking.
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Jul 13, 2005 3:37:07 PM CDT
Most Overrated...WONDER WOMAN. Most Underrated...THE PUNISHER.
by spyguy
Sure, Rucka's great on GOTHAM CENTRAL, but on WONDER WOMAN he's bland and predictable as hell. In fact, his only contributions to the title so far have been introducing Veronica Cale (a half-assed attempt at a female Lex Luthor), bringing in Medousa (don't forget the "o") and quickly killing her off, blinding Diana and giving her sight back. Big, fat, hairy deal. THE PUNISHER, on the other hand, featuring one kickass arc after another by Garth Ennis, who made the character better than ever when the title became a MAX series. The book has absolutely no hype and deserves more love than it's getting. Oh, and Gail Simone took the concept of supervillain team-ups by the throat and shoved a live grenade in its mouth when she wrote the script for VILLAINS UNITED #3. Best single issue I've read in a good, long while. JSA #75 and VU #3 managed to "crack the internet in half" more than HOUSE OF M(EDIOCRITY) #3 did...
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Done with 'em. The whole lot. I went to my pull-list and everything just seemed boring or stupid. Time to give 'em up.
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Yeah, he was guilted into it but I didn't see any mind control going on did you? Maybe Adam's an ass for manipulating his
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if one of the Assholes got up early, waited outside of their comic book shop until it opened, bought the first copy of All Star Batman & Robin the Boy Wonder and had it reviewed today. It's only a Frank Miller Batman comic, right?
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...I know what ya' mean. Between HoM and DC's new Crisis thing, it seems that the Big Two comic companies are telling me to take a hike. Oh, well, money saved it a good thing.
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We'll review it next week along with all of the other books released this week. And speaking of horses. http://horsehater.blogspot.com/
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They really should've reviewed AS Batman this week. Miller on a Batman monthly? Very good. Jim Lee drawing it? Not good at all. And does anyone know when AS Superman's coming out? Morrison + Quitely...well it just doesn't get much better than that.
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That is some weird ass stuff there, boy...I, personally, like horses. The Lone Ranger had a horse...
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DEAD!!!! No, I don't mind horses. It's those damn llamas that I don't trust.
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Jul 13, 2005 4:47:43 PM CDT
All Star Superman in December / Punisher MAX a really underrated
by gus nukem
next!
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I'd invite you all to check out this link for a really interesting interview with BMB, where he discusses everything from the interntet breaking in half to the reappearance of Hawkeye. Good stuff. http://tinyurl.com/chxvw
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It's an every 6 week book that will give miller and lee time to get the book in on time. The surprising last page of House of M # 3 was not that surprising since it is an alternate universe and i expect stuff like this to happen.
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I absolutely love this stuff! Heck, I'm even a member of Rebecca's site. More than worth it to view her wonderful artwork.
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Buzz Maverick reviewing an Eros book. Now I truly have seen everything. ;)
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Bendis did himself a disservice with his stupid HoM self promotion.
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with actual human beings in it.
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Can someone post what happpens on the last page of HoM #3? I forgot to look when I was in the comic store today, and kinda wonder what could have potentially broken the Internet in half.
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I'm sorry, you know I love ya, but it's true. Of course, last week was a slow week so I don't blame you for trying to mix it up. *** Most underrated book on the stands? Drawn & Quarterly's OR ELSE, which has gotten nary a mention on any site I've been to. Most overrated? All the Big 2's crossover shit.
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There's a hint in the JSA review...
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I love Wildguard:Fools Gold! You guys should check it out. Image Comics puts it out.
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...sees Wolverine *literally* spliting the internet in half with his adamantium claws in an awesome display of mutant power. Great Coipel visual too.
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I didn't see it yet either, but my understanding is that it can be summed up as "Hawkeye's not dead." Whoop-dee-doo. He died like a punk, now he's brought back in a shitty maxiseries, but he may or may not stick around depending on the outcome. WEAK. Chicken-fried weak covered in an weak, watery helping of weak gravy. Especially telling is the fact that in an interview this week Bendis admits that he didn't plan Hawkeye's return when he wrote DISASSEMBLED--the ideas for HOUSE OF M didn't come along until later, when he was writing AVENGERS FINALE or EPILOGUE or whatever it was called. He also admits in the same interview, however, that Hawkeye's death was totally lame and pointless and it's something Hawkeye will now be upset about. Talk about trying to have it both ways..."yeah, his death sucked, and now that he's back, he's pissed. What's that? Uhhh, no...I didn't plan on bringing him back pissed. It's another attempt on my part to just wing this stuff and hope nobody notices. What makes you think I caved and brought him back because everybody hated that story? Oh, the way I did the same thing with White Tiger over in DAREDEVIL? Coincidence. Totally."
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How can any one be surprised about Hawkeye being "alive again" in an alternate reality tale? Uncle fucking BEN is alive in the House of M.
This is why I'm not just blown away by HoM, and am likeing the IC stuff much better. At least all the IC stuff is happening in the "real world" of DC, and will ACTUALLY have rammifications.
They could really just do anything at the end of HOM and not really have to justify it because it's not happening in the real world. Just like that whole thing from "Dallas" back in the 80's where that one entire season was just a dream, cop-out bull shit. Marvel could have had the guts to do a "real world" event not this alternate reality crap. -
Jul 13, 2005 9:07:47 PM CDT
Ambush Bug, "Doom is wearing the same type of organic-style armo
by immortal_fish
I'm disappointed. As a comic reviewer steeped in comic lore -- you do realize that movie Doom does not "wear" any "organic-style" armor any more than does the ultimate Doom, yes? Did you see the movie before you wrote this, or did you fall prey to the same negative hype as I did, prior to seeing it for myself?
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...im seriously trying to get rid of a lot of my collection. i listed everything at comicspriceguide.com under kryptoncomics. take a look and drop me a line if u want to buy something. i know its shameless but i need the money!
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Jul 13, 2005 9:12:18 PM CDT
I know I'm going to get trashed for this, but I'm saying
by heywood jablowme
I know, I know, it's Geoff Johns?!? How dare I speak such heresy! I really dug the "Blitz" arc, but lately it's "Rogue this", "Rogue vs. ______ Rogue" or "Rogue something or other". It seems like it's all just filler until enough issues pass so they can bring back Zoom. I know Mr. Johns has gone through alot lately, so this is not intended to be an afront to him personally. I'm just answering the question. I know the guy has talent and I hope he does great things with Green Lantern. I just know that The Flash has become a book I pick up out of dedication instead of anticipation. As for underrated, I would make a case for Ultimate X-Men. It doesn't get the respect it deserves mainly because it's one of about 33 X-themed books out there and it's part of the "Ultimate" line, but Vaughn makes it a pretty good read. However, I could care less for the guy who's been doing the pencils lately, too blocky/anime for my tastes IMHO. And Buzz, while you're taking heat for you HoM review, I salute you on your take about the demi-god that is Diamond Dave. Can't wait for next week's column on Frank and the new Bat-book.
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Are you serious? Holy, crap. Jessica Abel, Colleen Coover, the Dodsons, Kano & Stefano Gaudiano, Tim Sale...
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yeah, I fell for the bad buzz and shitty trailer and poor critical response, but went in with an open mind...and saw a theater full of people totally embrace it. Laughing, cheering, kids jumping out their seats and yelling with joy at the screen. People buzzing on their way out (as opposed to Batman Begins, where everyone just looked despondent). A pure crowd pleaser--I've seen it twice now and both times the audience reacted the same. All I want from an FF movie is for them to get the Thing right, and for some fun little "family" moments, and it delivered on both counts. I know it isn't a great film, but who cares? It's a big Fantastic Four summer popcorn movie. What do you want it to do, wash your car?
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I pick it up from time to time but only for a few issues. I dig the Flash character, and keep hearing great things about that book, but God, it is such a freaking mess. There's little consistency from page to page, much less issue to issue. Have some ridilin, Geoff.
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You Limit yourself to the yas world of porn Way to easly. So you limit your porn to real people?Name a porn movie As good As a hentai vid or at least (For the purposes of this conversation) a H Dojinshi! Not very likly!!!
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Jul 13, 2005 10:48:43 PM CDT
"Hold our horses on the BATMAN AND ROBIN ALL STAR book"
by voice o. reason
That's what that was? I thought they'd given Vickie Vale her own book. Sheesh.
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me...er...
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http://tinyurl.com/a7zm3 I wonder if we're SUPPOSED to find it creepy that Steve Martin is wooing Claire Danes, or if Martin's got the Woody Allen Syndrome and thinks they look cute together.
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Jul 13, 2005 11:15:17 PM CDT
Even futher off-topic: a slightly longer trailer for 40 YEAR-OLD
by frankdrebin
http://tinyurl.com/98lh5
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Jul 13, 2005 11:21:09 PM CDT
So far off-topic, it's insane: a larger BROTHERS GRIMM trail
by frankdrebin
http://tinyurl.com/avoyq The trailer actually begins "In a world where..." and I don't think it was meant ironically.
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should direct a comic property...but which one(s) hmmmm??
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...I think this bit from his review is one of the sharpest ever obervations of Bendis's failings as a superhero writer: "If you look at issue #1, where the characters talk and talk and talk, they're not behaving heroically. They're behaving like the survivors in the refinery in THE ROAD WARRIOR or the townspeople in JAWS. Mr. Bendis needs to read some Joseph Campbell and bring in an Outsider hero who will decide a course and shut everyone up. Mad Max whistling and saying, 'Two days ago, I saw a rig that could pull that tanker. You want to get out of here, you talk to me!' Or Quint, scratching the chalkboard and saying, 'I'll find him for three. But I'll catch him and kill him for ten.'" ****** You've nailed it, Buzz - Bendis writes survivors, not heroes. Maybe that's the next paradigm shift and most fans are cool with it, but it's absolutely the truth.
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Voice O. Reason is right about ALL-STAR BATMAN AND ROBIN. I guess Miller really IS a parody of himself in the wake of DK2. ***** Sideshow Bob is right about the FANTASTIC FOUR movie. Well, maybe he overstated it by bringing up that "L" word that Fonzie could never say - I just know I had a shitload more fun at FF than I did at BATMAN BEGINS. ***** Heywood is right about THE FLASH. It was great for a few years - maybe even the best of its ilk - but it's been in a downturn since the first Reverse Flash storyline...and that was years ago. ***** Most overrated comic? ASTONISHING X-MEN. I loved it for a little while too, based on pure nostalgia, but looking at it with a truly critical eye...not much to offer. It's Morrison's NEW X-MEN, now all but retconned out of existence, that remains the only X-book of recent years that I see myself returning to. Most underrated? My old standby, THIEVES & KINGS. Or AGE OF BRONZE.
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Someone took my advice and reviewed Housewives At Play? From now on, Vroom is to never ever receive shit from anyone ever on pain of ballsack kicking. That book kicks ass, although it's a little disturbing how daterape and incest friendly it is. And whatever happened to the original date rapist with the glasses anyways? Oh, and Black Adam is awesome.
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...but I just can't get turned on by cartoons. I bought some issues of BONDAGE FAIRIES a decade or so ago because I found the concept so hilarious, but it just didn't have enough plot or characterization to bother. There's only so many times you can laugh out loud at a fairy having sex with a ladybug or centipede before it gets repetitive. And as for hentai, well...anybody who's actually had sex with a woman he respects knows what's wrong with it. It's pretty reprehensible stuff, really, and I don't find it watchable, much less entertaining or arousing. Some would call me old-fashioned, but I prefer the term "purist". Yep, I'm one of those purists who likes photos or movies of real live naked girls more than cartoons of 'em. I know, I know, it's crazy...but there it is. On the upside, every issue of this stuff I don't buy is one more on the racks in the "Over 21" section for somebody else to buy.
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i googled it but all i got is some adult themed anime.sleazy makes it sounds really bad...what am i missing?
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The East really gets off on the rape fantasy stuff, and not to the tune of "the girl secretely wants it", but more to the tune of "look at her helplessness and dispair." I don't care that Japan's got a minimal crime rate - that's indeed pretty fucked up.
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pretty fucked indeed.
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what books out now make leave you feeling like you've been raped by tentacles?
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That's something that I'd always just considered a cheap marketing angle, but apparently "it brightens up the summer" is an actual comment that people have been giving the Fantastic Four movie. Are people really that depressed after walking out of Batman Begins and War of the Worlds (jokes about their quality aside) that they need to see something "fun?" And can't you just say that about any crappy comedy? If I suggested that people go see 'The Pacifier' because it got read of all that drama crap that most domestic movies like 'In the Bedroom' lay claim to, how many people would be interested? Regarded individually, that type of comment means nothing. The movie could still suck balls. Yet people keep using the word "popcorn" like it's the grandest compliment they can give. I honestly don't get it.
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Thing i like about Bendis is he's doing his own thing. Love him or hate him, ehen handling superheroes he doesn't adhere to what others might think is apropiate for a superhero book. In fact he may suck at them like many an @$$hole claims, but he's not going down the crappy Geoff Johns "old school but hip and modern" take on the subject, which usually means "some old guy did it better back in the day". Daredevil may be about people talking about Daredevil, and you may hate the book for that, but at least he's trying something different. If there's one thing there's an abundance of in american comics is superhero titles, so drop Bendis' and take your pick...there's plenty more fish in that sea. In fact if you're dropping a Bendis superhero book for another title, make it *non* superhero, please...for the sake of common sense.
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...they're retarded
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Jul 14, 2005 1:15:52 AM CDT
FLASH Definitely underrated DD is WAY Overrated, ALEX ROSS Overr
by southfield
Flash always got the short end of the stick, whether it was written by WAID or JOhns, it got shafted shafted shafted! The only reason FLash got ANY press was because of Waids' association with KIngdom COme. And the only reason he gets any press now is cos it's one of Johns' other books, the ones he's writing when his not writing JSA or Green LAntern. (BTW Jerry O'Connell would rock as Flash in a movie.) FLash has been getting screwed everytime. GOd even MArvel's PR machine, Wizard MAgazine has rated it time and time again the MOST underappreciated comic by fans. Oh and if you happen to have a copy of the TRade of TErminal velocity. Check out the INTRO by GRant MOrrison. Mr MOrrison, who doesn't take shit from no one and doesn't take the piss either, (cos he hangs out with a scotsmen and ALan Moore can stand him; which is few and far between, believe me,) says that FLASH was the seminal title of mainstream comics to pull the entire superhero genre kicking and screaming from the trench-coated 'mother fixated perverts'of the 80's and early 90's to a point where writers like bendis could write his stuff in the main stream, and that was well BEFORE Joey Q started his MArvel REnnaissance. Nuff said about that.
DD, is a highly overrated middle to highbrow graphic novel written over a period of years that hopefully at the end will make some sense.
WHAT THE FU--!!! It's a comic dammit. I don't want to wait until I'm pushing 50 to read all of it and then finally go,as I die ' yes i see where he going with this, a-ha good show chap.' NO. NO . NO!
MEssing with format and just telling a story differently is cool . Its pushing the limits of a medium that is so versatile, you could do just about anything.
THe question is, do you have to?
DD to me, is pretensious bullshit. It has some good moments, it's well written (can't fault bendis their- HAWKEYE LIVES, MOTHERFUCKER!) but man, less is more. Say it with me, less is more.
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Hey Dave_F, why's Miller a parody of himself since DK2? And Buzz can't be serious about Rebecca drawing the best women in comics. He may not have noticed but some dude called Milo Manara's still doing comics today...and he's just one of many many many artists who draw better women than Rebecca. In fact i checked Housewives at play out and it was pretty horrible. Good porn comic? Secret plot.
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..there I was just waiting for the bus and I see this bald dude on a bike. "Huh," I thought, "That looks a lot like Brian Michael Bendis." He got closer and passed me and I saw it WAS Bendis himself. I flashed him the "Thumbs Up" and he waved. He looked less ragged then as opposed to The Emerald City Comicon appearance just a month before that. Living in Portland must be great for a professional comic writer.
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BENDIS: I've got to agree with El Vale. Even if I don't particularly enjoy a book he's doing, (and there are several,) the man is comitted 100% to making comics his way. You've at least got to respect that. REBECCA: There are other artists that draw excellent females. Of the ones mentioned here in TB, I'm a fan of Coover and Manara, and a HUUUGE fan of Tim Sale. I will also say that, for whatever reason, Rebecca's stuff doesn't look quite as good in color. Her B&W stuff, particularly her pin-up books, are astonishing. Her shading, her sense of anatomy, her layouts... all amazing. I'd post a link to one, but this being a public forum and all... BENDIS AGAIN: Living in Portland definitly agrees with him.I've had occasion to bump into him at the local mall with his little girl, and every time he's been gracious as all hell. Even when it's been right after we've given him a savaging review, the man is all smiles. The guy's the biggest mensch I've ever met.
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I say this because the ending to that one looks to be quite controversial as well. The good news for most of you is that Bendis actually juggles the talky and the smashy in the same book. But the ending... uhh.... I guess I'll just have to see where he goes with this one.
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Most Overrated: Jim Lee. Or that Finch cat. Maybe I'm a shallow bastard but I can't stand this whole 'sketch-like' orange/rust-colored trend with Bendis books. EVERYTHING is fucking the color of rust. Am I losing my mind or something??! Finch, Trevor Hairsine, all of em go screw. Ah I'm talking out my ass.
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The way he writes "The Hell..." instead of "What the Hell...". Who talks like that?
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Jul 14, 2005 10:11:58 AM CDT
Jim Lee isn't overrated, he's just awesome at what he do
by the heathen
Micheal Turner I would say is overrated if you want a popular artist to list. Dave_F, why is Miller a parody of himself since DK2? Walking Dead deserves all the press it gets. Anybody with me on The Gift being overrated? And when have "popcorn movies" that are best desrcibed as "it was just
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sideshow, I thought I was the only one that was bothered by that.
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Actually, Miller's self-parody goes back further than DK2 - he was repeating himself at least as early as the second SIN CITY project. And, hey, I've enjoyed most of the SIN CITY stuff even if the first entry was the only great one, but it's most certainly Miller spinning his wheels. His particular brand of Mickey-Spillane-by-way-of-superhero-level-hyperbole is vastly repetetive. I think it was one of the guys on Bendis's board who said that ALL-STAR BATMAN AND ROBIN read like a SIN CITY Mad Libs with new names plugged in, and that guy was dead-on. Miller's lost track of what little subtlety he once had and as a result, his characters are all noir archetypes. Noir might be the all-time buzzword for "cool storytelling", but it can also just be an excuse for lazy writing and characterization. As a counterexample, think back to Miller's portrayal of bad cop Flass in BATMAN: YEAR ONE - now that was an innovatively scummy portrayal of police corruption! "Had this little number on him, Jimmy. "It's a comb, Flass." "I'm only human, Jimmy!" Such an oily fratboy of a bastard, that character. Noir-influenced, but *unique*. Now cut ahead to ALL-STAR #1: "Got a mouth on you, don't you, babe? Only now it ain't so damn PRETTY." SIN CITY Mad Libs, my friends.
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The inking on "Hush" was atrocious especially towards the end of the run. BLECHHHH...
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Homeboy Frank Miller is done in my book. Most of his storytelling in the last 10 or more years has just been juvenile to the Nth degree. I just started reading GIVE ME LIBERTY again a couple of days ago and, to me anyway, that was his LAST great work. He peaked on that book. MARTHA WASHINGTON GOES TO WAR was a severe disappointment, however. What can I say? Sequels, for the most part suck. I never, ever liked Sin City story-wise but the art style that he embraced was fantastic. Miller's still a visionary to an extent but he really hasn't done anything truly "adult" or thoughtful in a while and that includes Sin City. I doubt All-Star Batman and Robin will change that although I will pick up the first issue tonight out of curiosity's sake. My expectations are truly low after the horrible abortion that DK 2 turned out to be...bleccchhh and double bleccchhhh...
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Jul 14, 2005 11:11:56 AM CDT
Jerry O'Connells cheeks are too rosey to play Hal Jordan. An
by the heathen
I don't dislike O'Connell, but he's kinda goofy. Jordan is a jet pilot, cocky, and suave too. If Dennis Quaid was 15-20 years younger I could see him playing Hal. As long as Jack Black never plays a Green Lantern it'll be okay. Dave_F, maybe Miller is repeating himself, maybe it's just his style, or maybe you just had more fun or like FF over Batman Begins? I repeat: maybe you like FF over Batman Begins?
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Doesn't one guy do everything on the book? It comes out about every 3 months because it's just him right? Also, could anyone tell me more about it's story? I think it is historically accurate from what I've heard as well.
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Usually it's the only place to get some half-decent (for Porn) story or context before we get close-ups of genitals smashing into each other. Of course, the good stuff is rare or hard to find (or maybe it's just 'cause I'm cheap and won't pay for it), but I think comics are probably the best medium for porn. Us men are visual, so prose doesn't really cut it the way it could. And live action tentacle porn is cost prohibitive (by which I mean, 99% of live action porn is either a plastic model and an ugly dude shagging in a producer's basement, or clip compilations of the same thing).
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Jul 14, 2005 11:39:16 AM CDT
Are people really that depressed after walking out of Batman Beg
by dave_f
So asked Ribbons a few posts back. And I'll say, not so much with WAR OF THE WORLDS. I thought it was a meanderer of a flick, but loved the build-up, had no tonal problems with it. Was a pretty good example of its genre. But as for BATMAN BEGINS, yeah, I won't say I was 'depressed' after it, but it did encapsulate a lot of what I hate about modern superheroes and the need to "explain" everything for the false god of Realism. I couldn't give a shit how Bruce came up with the Batmobile or his costume, but I know that he loses a lot of his mythic quality if he doesn't at least come up with them *himself*. And on a broader note, I'm just weary of the post-70s angst that clings to every recent Batman project with the exception of the rightly-lauded '90s animated series. So BATMAN BEGINS had some good filmmaking going on and did get some stuff right (finally, a Batman who's not made out to be a total nutjob), but ultimately it played out to me as an apology for classic superhero genre conventions. And y'know what? Screw that. FANTASTIC FOUR...in many ways, yes, a mediocre, even sub-par movie when judged objectively, but yes, I did see it as something of a cure for BATMAN's gloom. No embarassment about that. FF actually captured something of the comic's buoyant spirit, actually had some fun with the genre, and right now, that's exactly what I'm looking for with superheroes. I might see it again in a few months and go, "What was I thinking?" Just at the moment, though, it's a movie that gave me good vibes, and that actually trumps its missteps. The audience I saw it with seemed to be having as much fun as Sideshow Bob's audience, by the by.
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May I suggest Bill Willingham's fantasy-themed porn comic, IRONWOOD? It's a veritable lesbo a-go-go, even if there's that one uncomfortable scene where the lead guy gives oral sex to a female centaur. Pretty imaginative and well-drawn for porn, though.
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(Seriously about the SPOILERS. If you're a New Avengers fan, wait to read until after you've read the issue.) Ribbons--Yeah, I read it last night and about the ending, I thought... well, that's one way to go. I have to say, I've never read anything about the Sentry before, so I'm going with what Bendis gives me on this one. I'm relatively intrigued by the idea of a friggin' whackjob with superpowers, but the idea that he's taken his identity from a comic book character... Okay, I have to admit, I like it. The thing I don't like is the idea that it's actually Paul Jenkins in the comic. I don't like that it's him because that places the Sentry and the Avengers in "our" universe instead of just slightly removed. It's an idea I think BMB will play with well, but it fells like Bendis himself could show up in the next issue and be like, "Hey, I write you guys!" It's not a path I'd take, but we'll see where it goes. As for the rest of the issue, I really dug it. The fight with Spidey, Wolverine, Cage, and Spider-Woman vs. The Wrecker (or whatever the hell his name was) was pretty badass. I like this guy filling in with the art. Quite good.
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Exactamundo. I know you haven't, but I HAVE read the miniseries "The Sentry," which was written by Paul Jenkins. I'll stay out of spoiler-ific territory in case you ever plan on reading it and want to experience it with a fresh eye, but here are some details which were either revealed in the last ish of New Avengers or that won't really take away from the series itself: every time the Sentry uses his powers, a sort of anti-Sentry appears called the Void. I don't remember the extent of his powers, exactly, but he's at least on a par with Sentry. That kind of force interested in malice can be considerably dangerous. When Bendis said he wanted to use the Sentry in the comic, I was intrigued, sort of because of this. How would he use his powers without, you know, the Void coming? Well, this seems like a rather convenient way of taking the Void out of the equation: making the Sentry batshit crazy. Which he sort of was in the Jenkins comic anyway. I mean, it is an interesting prospect to have a completely insane team member among the Avengers (although they have had their share of psychological breakdowns on that team anyway), but it doesn't seem so much like "expanding" on the idea of the character the Sentry so much as creating a new one, and altering the reality of the Marvel Universe in the process. I hope you won't mind that I point out a couple of Avengers made guest appearances in the comic "The Sentry" that Jenkins wrote, which makes things even more complicated. Does that mean that he took the characters from the Marvel Universe and used them in his comic series "The Sentry?" But the real Sentry doesn't exist, he took HIS identity from the comic, so he can't exist, even though the other characters do exist, because Jenkins took THEM from "real life?" It's dizzying and it's post-post-modern and I almost feel like all they need is Bendis to show up before the entire world collapses in on itself or something. Needless to say, I'm not altogether sure how I feel about the idea. As for the rest of New Avengers, yeah, it was pretty good. Bendis can still make with the funnies with Spider-Man. I'm a little puzzled about why that Secret Society was arguing about some of the things they were arguing about, but it did give Bendis a chance to sort of clarify how he sees Tony Stark, and I enjoyed the characterization of Reed. The fight was good, has me wondering exactly how they're going to resolve things. And McNiven's art is great; certainly a pretty good "fill-in" artist to go grab for a few issues. I love the way he drew the Wrecker. Umm...this post was a little disjointed. I don't know if there was a "gist" to it, but I hope that it came out okay for people reading.
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Don't worry, you were rather coherent. I kept thinking that this bit here--"It's dizzying and it's post-post-modern and I almost feel like all they need is Bendis to show up before the entire world collapses in on itself or something."--could actually be what Bendis was talking about with the "Internet breaking in half" bit. Maybe House of M is all misdirection and we're going to be driven batshit crazy like the Sentry, trying to figure out which world is which. Part of me likes the idea that the Jenkins character that exists in the Marvel Universe could be a prosperous comic writer writing about a fictional character called the Sentry in addition to writing fictional adventures about the "real life" Avengers, X-Men, etc. Does that make sense? It's like writing a "based on a true story" story, but with super powers. I still don't think that quite explains it all, but it's an interesting and ORIGINAL premise to say that this "Sentry" took his powers and persona from a comic he read. And that opening meeting with the "heads of state" was pretty great, especially Reed's translation into Atlantean. Personally, I'm very much enjoying how New Avengers and House of M are segueing us out of Avengers Disassembled into something new and exciting.
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That WAS some nice art from Steve McNiven. He's a genuine breakout talent.
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i havent read the issue yet tho i plan to pick it up tonight after work but i went ahead and read the posts anyways.sounds alright as long as this doesnt go the way of the dark tower series if u know what i mean. its got me to where i cant even read any stepehen king at all how disapointing that mess was.
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yeah im with u on that. i dont know anybody that talks like that and im blessed with friends that know a lot of variations of insults and profanity
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Honest. I've done it for so long I don't even remember when it started. It's kinda like when you're thinking aloud and only say part of your sentence. It actually makes sense to me since I do it, and so do some of my friends,but if you don't know anybody who does it might seem weird.
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Elmore Leonard has been using that particular expression and others like it to great efferct in his novels for quite some time now. Bendis is an admitted admirer of his work, along with Aaron Sorkin and David Mamet. These are guys who effortlessly trade back and forth between natural and stylized dialogue, and I would say that Bendis does this pretty effectively as well. He's not a genius by any means, but he's clearly a student of these great writers. There are times I actually feel Bendis' superhero-speak would get a better reception if it was acted out and performed live. Using "the hell" without the "what" is a perfect example of this.
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I see what he's going for and I don't mind it every once in a while, but I've picked up on it enough for it to bother me. It seems to be a writing crutch instead of smart or an homage to Leonard.
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Well, I don't think you can make an argument that "the hell" and it's ilk are really crutches Bendis uses in his writing. The guy has crutches, that just ain't one of them. And I wasn't really implying that such usage is simply an homage to Leonard (though he does make a few blatant homages in some of his series--the Glengarry "Will you go to lunch?" scene in Ultimate Spider-Man, for one). I think Bendis is the kind of writer who sees things he likes in other people's styles and picks and chooses certain ones to adapt for his own purposes. He himself says he's never had any formal training. He just listens to and reads what others do and winds up with an amalgam of it all. Now, I know his stuff isn't acted out and that it's meant to be read in a comic format, but... Well, I feel we're too often left with boring, flat, on-the-nost dialogue that lacks subtlety, nuance and any kind of REAL humanity. Benids, for his narrative faults, does attempt to find the character and speak words in their voice. He tries to make things a little more interesting, to play on words when others wouldn't. Sometimes he goes too far, but I really don't think "the hell"--for as often as its used--is one of those times.
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I actually have a couple...but lemme asure you i'm a fan of the movie, i liked it a lot. My first dissapointment with it was actually my fault, cause i read so many reviews and shit i ended up pretty much knowing what every cool moment was beforehand so when said moments finally happened on-screen...all i could think of was "I thought it was gonna be cooler". My one true complait is this: Anyone else think they tried so hard to make the movie believable and the situations real and the drama dramatic that when Wayne finally shows up in his batsuit and speaking with that voice like he's burping out words...that he looks kinda like, well...silly? It was cool and all but it just didn't work as much as it should have for me. All the while i kept thinking "Oh so THAT'S why Burton made Gotham all eccentric and funky and weird, so a guy dressed up like a Bat doesn't seem out of place!". Still the movie had great moments and every time Christian Bale and Michael Cane were onscreen together it was a joy to watch. And the audience i saw it with was having a blast with it (maybe it's a colombian thing). Oh and you gouys talking bout the Sentry stuff: Cut it out, yer giving me a headache.
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To clarify, you enjoyed Fantastic Four over Batman Begins? Really? Seriously? No shitting? Because... Wow.
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My problem with Batman Begins is the fact that they seem to take Batman for granted. He
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Jul 14, 2005 6:05:49 PM CDT
"Benids, for his narrative faults, does attempt to find the char
by jonquixote
I haven't read any work by this Benids guy, but if what you say is true, I'm hoping that he becomes one of the people Bendis "learns" from, because in the Bendis I've read...everybody sounds freakin' the same. He's almost as bad as Kevin Smith in this regard, whether he's got Hawkeye giving Viper a shaggin' rating, Captain America discussing bagel minutia, or a who's saying what stutter-filled conversation between Matt & Foggy, they all speakee Bendis fluently, with occasional vocabularly or slang choices tossed out as begrudging admissions that the characters retain some semblance of individual identity despite their otherwise complete assimiliation into full-on Bendis inaction figures.
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Jul 14, 2005 6:10:09 PM CDT
"My problem with Batman Begins is the fact that they seem to tak
by jonquixote
From people claiming Bendis gives each character a voice to this, am I in Bizarro world? The whole point of Batman Begins was to establish Batman's freaky-deaky nature to the public at large - did Flass 'take Batman for granted'? The thugs at the dock? The cops during the chase? Maybe the fact that they chose to tell the story from Batman's point of view meant you missed this - of course, Batman isn't freaky and mysterious to Batman himself - but to most of the people in Gotham City (and bear in mind that Gordon got to see Batman pre-Batman too, and follow along with the evolution and the motivation; of course you could argue that trust came too easily, but that could be rationalized if not debated), Batman was freakish and far from normal.
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Perhaps I should revise my statement some. Bendis does have a certain "Bendis-speak" in the same way Tarantino has his, Mamet has his, Sorkin has his. In many of those films/shows, the style in which the characters speak feels very closely related to their author and very similar from character to character. But when those words are married with the right character and said at the right moment, they feel true. Yes, Bendis tends to write everyone a little too close to Spider-Man (and he writes Spider-Man better than anyone, for my money), but he does get them right, for the most part. Take a look at New Avengers #7, at the opening scene with the heads of all the teams. It's all Bendis dialogue. It all FEELS like Bendis dialogue. But it's also very specific to each character and very appropriate for the scene. On another note, I think Bendis does an even better job of crafting a character's voice in his "original" work. I'd suggest you read some of Powers and check out the strong, stoic Walker versus the mile-a-minute Pilgrim. Their words feel authentic to who's who, yet it always feels like Bendis. Hell, four years of West Wing felt like Aaron Sorkin every second, yet you knew every one of those characters.
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I see what you're saying about the Sentry thing, I just don't know if I like it.
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After "Begins" I drove home. After "FF" I stopped at the comics store on the way home to buy something...anything! The FF movie just got me jazzed about comics. Was part of this because Batman comics have been so weak lately (Cooke short stories exempted), while FF has been fairly strong? Sure. The Begins movie, as Dave said, was apologist fare. And I don't want apologize for loving comics, dammit. I want to embrace it!
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I told my friends who are on the fence to see it in a theater or not bother. I imagine it won't come off so well in your living room on your TV, with yourself or one or two others.
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I didn't like how they opted for techno-realism, instead of embracing the magic(k)al/fantasy elements of the mythos. A 6-yr old's solemn vow, the bat crashing through the window when BW was about to give up his (prenatal) crusade. Instead we get a conspiracy of crime fghters (okay, they 're ninjas) and everything thought out and *engineered* - instead of inspired. Also, whatever good elements only intelligent readers would get, were now dug out and shed light upon for the general movie-going audience to experience and criticize and understand. Some things should better be implied. Whatever happened to fantasy and creative thinking? It was as if this movie was created so as to meticulously prove to the average movie going ape, that batman shouldn't be preposterous or a fictional character. But why? Of course, Christian Bale was excellent as always.
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on your "Frank Miller, self-parodist" post -
if everything you posted is true then FM is just repeating himself, but he doesn't parody himself. To do so, he would have to make fun of his short-comings (or his style, or his works in general). A self-parody would have to be (by definition, I guess) momentary and should be considered an act of modesty. According to your post, he most definitely isn't parodying himself. Admit your culpa, now. Be a man. -
Jul 14, 2005 9:56:55 PM CDT
EU AICN talkbackers - we are now officially and legally (and at
by gus nukem
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i have a 27x40 poster of "The click" over my bed.
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"You tell that slimy piece of worm-ridden filth he'll get no such pleasure from us. Right?" **** Listen, I can enjoy a good semantics argument as well as the next guy, but I stand by what I wrote. Miller, in bringing the SIN CITY-level hyperbole to every_damn_project, is, in fact, veering into self-parody. Sure, BATMAN's a comic with its own degree of hyperbole, but traditionally a higher degree of verisimilitude than SIN CITY. But here comes Miller on ALL-STAR with his almost laughable gangster cliches, his ditzy femme cliches, and hell, even his goddamn car-love cliches (you're telling me a gossip columnist is gonna say, "This crate's got GAME" when she gets begind the wheel?!). Look, unintentional self-parody is *still* self-parody. I can just see Batman's internal monologue next issue: "Lucky amateur. You got lucky. Keep breathing, put the pain behind you. Ignore that rustling in your ribcage. Keep breathing. Lucky amateur." I wish it wasn't the case, but sadly...it is. ALL-STAR BATMAN & ROBIN had all the craftsmanship of BATMAN/SPAWN.
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The first time Batman calls Robin a "good soldier" I'm gonna hunt down Frank Miller and slap him. He'll know why.
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All style, no substance. Technically sound, but the characters are stiff and look like they're always posing. Everyone has the exact same facial expression all the time. All men look like body builders, and all the women look like Playmates. Virtually every shot is from the same perspective. Its as if the man thinks every panel should look like a splash page. He's more talented than a lot of the other fan-favorite hacks out there, but I got bored with his work a long time ago.
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Jul 15, 2005 12:07:39 AM CDT
The Cool Thing About The FF Flick Is We Learn That Doom Knows Ho
by buzz maverik
It's an old Latverian pool game. I've just been hired by Avi Arad to write FF 2 (I get a million dollars, a custom made Purdy shotgun, and a new H2 packed solid with Cuban cigars). I'm including this scene. INT. CASTLE VON DOOM --BATHROOM -- NIGHT Doom and his slumber party guests all gather in front of the mirror. VICTOR: "Okay, we light the black candle and we all chant Bloody Mary 13 times. RED SKULL: "What happens?" VICTOR: "Bloody Mary'll appear in the mirror." LEADER: "I don't want to be a wuss, but that's already freaking me out." MAGNETO: "Will she be naked?" KINGPIN: "I heard she's Satan's wife." MANDARIN: "See, now that's just stupid. If you were Satan, you'd have so many chicks, why would you settle down with just one?" LOKI: "You know, he still sees other chicks."
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who's this bendis guy everyone is yammering about? when did he become a member of the avengers? so they gave him the same powers as the sentry and made the sentry crazy? why? does bendis have a better costume? i mean sentry sounds better than bendis, doesn't it?
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Yeah, Gordon had a pre-Batman experience but when he saw him on the fire escape outside of his apartment DRESSED AS A BAT a reaction would have been nice instead of a nod and a "Hey, how ya doin'?" And while yes, the criminals at the dock were pretty scared of him the public at large pretty much was like, OK there's a guy dressed as a bat out there...kinda strange...And your excuse that the story is being told from Batman's POV doesn't wash. Even if something's being told by a character's POV other elements of the story still react to him. The only thing I got from that movie was that dock scene and nothing else. Hardly anyone makes any commentary about how unique and bizarre it is that there's a guy dressed as a bat out on the streets fighting crime! Not the media, not the police, not the D.A....nobody! In my opinion they sacrificed those aspects of the story by putting the Scarecrow in there. Just have Ra's As Ghul (sp?) be the only villain controlling all the Gotham crime families and let HIM be the ONLY villain! Then you have more time to focus on the unique effect Batman has on the populace. It's a great film but to me that's what makes it flawed.
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Jul 15, 2005 2:24:06 AM CDT
Oh, and haven't had a chance to actually read All Star Batma
by superhero
Man, WHY did I buy that book? It's looking to be one MAJOR disappointment? How many issues is it? Oh, well, maybe I can hock it on E-Bay...The Freshmen turned out to be a lousy book too...
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Apparently Frank Miller thinks its still 1989. "I have date with Bruce Wayne! How cool is that?" **puke**
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Here's a question that might stump even the most ardent Lee fan: for all the qualities you might see in his art, can you ever in a million years imagine him drawing a scene that moves you emotionally? 'Cause I sure can't, and if an artist is never going to be able to trigger an emotional response, what damn good is he at telling stories? I know this is a very subjective area, but without getting into analyzing technical stuff like line weight, spotting blacks, and perspective, just tell me: can the guy trigger an emotional response in you? And if so, when has it happened? (Note: the trouser-tightening response your 13-year-old self had to Lee's rendition of Rogue in '93 isn't what I'm talking about.)
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... but I still find his stuff dishwater dull.
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FF, Batman Begins, those are all old news. What I wanna know is who everyone would cast in the Vivid Productions version of Housewives at Play?
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Lee is overrated. Lantern-jawed guys, impossibly proportioned women (it wouldn't be a Lee comic without just a LIL' T&A RIGHT??!). The only difference between his characters are hair color and clothes. Dave: you got it all wrong man...it was Psylocke coming out of the water in the wetsuit, not Rogue! And to All Star B&R-- yeah I think I'll go read Dark Victory again, thank you very much.
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Has anybody heard of the Moore written, Melinda Gebbe drawn porn comic called "Lost Girls?" It's supposed to be out this summer from Top Shelf, I think. I think it will be really good, maybe even on a From Hell/Watchmen level. He said that he's going to redeem the word pronographer, and the only difference between pornography and erotica is the income level of the person looking at it. He did a great interview with all these ideas about how there are no real postive or quality examples of the genre and he wants to do something with a little bit more thought and heart in it. Comments?
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The purpose of porn is *spoilers* masturbating! *end spoilers* ie- artificial sex while getting aroused by a depiction of sex (technically artificial yet again). It's also fairly evil in the way that it objectifies and denigrates the human body, especially females and fosters unhealthy relationships. Ooh I probably just made myself fairly unpopular...just my opinion folks.
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People heard that line-up and instantly thought "greatest book ever", when in fact it never had a chance to be close.
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And I'm enjoying Bryan O'Malley's artwork significantly more than I've enjoyed Jim Lee's since 1992.
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Jul 15, 2005 9:34:38 AM CDT
MasterWhedon, HoM, Sentry, All Star, Serenity, and who else is u
by the heathen
Sorry to reply so late, I had a busy afternoon. Maybe
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Jul 15, 2005 10:59:29 AM CDT
Finally read All Star Batman and Robin Last night...lame...
by superhero
But I may keep reading it just because I am one of the hooligans that really likes Jim Lee's work. What can I say? I'm the sucker born every minute. The whole dress up with Vicki Vale thing was just disturbing though...what, three pages of her prancing around in her underwear and then a two page spread of her playing dress up???? Not that I have a problem with renditions of ladies in their underwear but how in the hell di that opening sequence serve the larger story at all???? It was SO lame...is this what Frank Miller thinks makes good story telling? The whole Robin:Year One series they did a couple of years ago was MUCH better than this. If Miller wants to make Vicki Vale stories then he should make Vicki Vale comics. Not disguise them in comics about Robin...Hmmmmm, now that I think of it...yeah, I probably won't be picking up the rest of this series. I'll wait to pick up the trade at a convention discount bin in a couple of years...just like I'm doing with Ultimate X-Men and Fantastic Four.
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Jul 15, 2005 11:22:21 AM CDT
Dan Slott is was underrated, but now he's getting popular it
by the heathen
Good. We need people with his enthusiasm. Check out his interview about his ongoing The Thing series at Newsarama. "readers need a fun comic! Seriously! This is going to be a book where characters don
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Totally agree with some of the above posters. This was pretty bland and I expected quite a bit more. Earlier, folks were discussing Frank Miller being a parody of himself now days, but I'd say that Vicki Vale ass panel shows Jim Lee to be the true parody of a former self. I just... argh. I really loved Lee's work on Hush, but everything here seems to feel like early '90s X-Men. Beautiful stuff, but there's something I'm not liking. And I really do wish they'd spent more time on Robin before getting into the parents dying. Hell, if Bendis had written this series, we'd have this first issue drawn out into a full 6-story arc. And I think I'd prefer that a bit more. I mean, come on, how were we introduced to Bruce Wayne? In a medium 2-shot at the circus. No no no no, Frank. You need to INTRODUCE your lead in the #1 issue (which, I know, he saves it for Bats at the end--but did anyone else feel that was lacking the necessary punch?). I don't know. This is the first Batman book I've bought in some time. I'll pick up the next few to see where it goes, but they better hook me by #6.
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i miss frank miller...whatever happened to him?
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Everybody is talking about All Star Batman and Robin in this week's column cause it's fresh in their minds...so we're all gonna be spent by the time next week's column rolls around with the actual review. Maybe you should switch to an every Monday schedule so as to avoid this... ?
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blackthought, my eyes are on you
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your eyes need to be on something...but you know the end of the talkback will be mine...most underrated comic?...um, boondocks...whut you mean that doesn't count? it's got word ballons and stuff!
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Lost girls has been in the making for years and years, is it really being published this summer? Grown up fairy tale girls in a hotel room telling their sex stories? I'm in! Oh and there's this comic called True porn which is about indy creators telling their true life sex stories and volume 2's coming out in september...you @$$holes should try to find it and review it. Also i read the All star Frank Miller interview on Newsarama and for some reason he just seems bored writing the book to me. My guess is he's probably not too happy working with Jim Lee, i mean the guy's written for Geoff Darrow and David Mazzuchelli (sp?) fer chrissakes! He said Lee's good at spectacle so he's gonna give him spectacle, so that Vicky Vale walking around in her underwear was prolly written BECAUSE Lee's the artist. Like Dave_F said the man is incapable of eliciting emotional responses from an audience, what's Miller to do? Write Lee scenes with women undressing and square jawed men jumping from rooftops of course. And that Dan Slott interview was great, he's like some sort of very excited retarded person or something...and i mean that in a good way. I haven't read any of his comics but they sound "hella" fun
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Jul 15, 2005 3:24:30 PM CDT
Now I know why I come on this particular board to talk about com
by mortsleam
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Jul 15, 2005 4:16:29 PM CDT
I Will Be Giving Frank & Jim A Stern Talking-to In Our Next Colu
by buzz maverik
Sorry this week's comics can't be in this week's column. Maybe someday but not now and God bless those sites that can do it. On the other hand...a Shigeru said, a lot of what will be said, well, you guys are saying it right now! Which is great! Somebody even has the same "Good soldier" aversion that I do but I'm still gonna use it anyway. Seeing the reaction, I almost wished I could have liked ALL STAR BATMAN & ROBIN because it would have made for an interesting review and talkback. But that's one thing you get here: we don't lie to you about how we feel about the comics. Most of the reviewers know each other well enough that we'd be able to tell when somebody was bullshitting and we'd call each other on it. So we fucking buy our comics at the shop like you do. I keep telling the publishers, "Comps? You want to buy reviews, don't offer me freaking comic books! You give me a box of Cuban cigars and I'll write 200 words on why Bendis is our greatest living President. Buy me a case of Patron and I'll write about how we should all donate a kidney in case John Byrne ever needs one." But I gotta go with the consensus for once on ASBR.
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If you don't know who Bruce Wayne is, you probably won't be reading ALL STAR BATMAN & ROBIN. He's an icon. Even people who hate comics can tell you about how he was bitten by a radioactive bat and became Batman. His introduction has been the past 60+ years of comic books, so who the hell needs to hear him talk about it? He's a man. We're men. We don't talk. Further, he's a Hero with a capital H. Miller let's us know that Batman is an Outsider, with a capital O, in Gotham. The Outsider Hero in Jungian psychology and in everything Joseph Campbell ever wrote, it going to take action to turn the system on its' ass. It's not the Heroes that are held hostage at the Nakotomi Christmas party. It wasn't John McClane who schemed and argued and strategized. He hid and started capping terrorists. Outsider Fucking Hero. Same thing in the sequel. Let everyone else maintain the status quo, he's going to follow his hunches and take action. For all its' faults, ASBR told us everything we needed to know about Batman and Bruce Wayne for that story and that issue. We didn't even have to relive the origin, in which his spaceship was bombarded by cosmic bats.
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Are there any girls in these AICN comics talkbacks? Or in the whole of AICN?
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Jul 15, 2005 5:00:04 PM CDT
Nope. AICN Is Where You Come When You're Tired Of Getting L
by buzz maverik
Everyone here has gotten laid so much that we need a break so we come here.
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All that getting laid makes geeks starve for discussions about Frank Miller
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You have the discussions about Frank Miller to insure that you won't get laid.
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Say "hi" to all the boys, Dave.
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...but I think you guys creeped 'em out. I keep telling you, you have to pretend you're sensitive.
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to whom are you referring ?
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El Vale, I couldn't agree with you more on the artists illustrating a Frank 'the Tank' Miller script. I wish All-Star B & R t B W was drawn by Frank Quitely, or Paul Pope. I wish Frank Quitely collaborated with top-writers more often. Not that I am complaining about Grant Morrison, or about All-Star Effin' Superman later this year...
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You're right about Quitely, he's just amazing and my favourite artist working today. Put him together with Morrison and you make me a happy man. Oh and Alex Ross is definitelly overrated.
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Jul 15, 2005 7:26:22 PM CDT
Hey Buzz, you should write your ASB&R review in "Miller-speak"
by fuzzyjefe
All-star Batman & Robin. How do I feel? Five pages of butts & boobs. NO. Must focus. Don't let yourself get distracted. Be a good reviewer. Focus. Write the review. Is it good? (butt) Focus! No time for distractions. (boobs) Rein it in. Control it. No time. No time.---That was, of course, Batman Miller-speak. You could also try Sin City Miller-speak: So I bought this book even though I've been burned by this guy in the past. Not just some pansy-ass neo-sporine blister, either. I'm talking third-degree skin-falling-off-your-bones burned. But sometimes all it takes is the promise of what used to be (or maybe what you BELIEVED it used to be) to bring you back. Maybe it won't be so bad this time. But you know the truth. In your gut. Down deep where you try to bury your common sense with booze and Bendis. You know it won't be as bad. Just a hell of a lot worse. But you read that thing anyway. Why? Because sometimes being a comic reviewer means wading through a lot of shit.
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i was doing ok with the whole vicky vale thing even though it was on my last nerve "Im like totally on a date with bruce wayne,like ohmigod!" but when his internal monologue called robin a brat i was out. the youve been drafted into a war thing was the capper of course. i should have know better-the guy at my comic shop who is as avid a geek as you can get said he hated it. but man i didnt expect crap of this magnitude.quick question on a side note. new avengers 7:i dont get the iron man spider woman conversation. it made it look like he was in some kind of control room but i guess he was iside the armor?the hell?!! i thought it was gonna be a huge iron man robot a la voltron and he was inside it. please help
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And i see "The hell?" is becoming quite popular with talkbackers the world over. Also El Vale predicts Walking dead hatred will grow quite popular in coming months. Not cause the book is bad or the quality dwindles, but cause there's bitter assfucks out there who hate things everyone likes.
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You're honestly going to tell me you didn't think Bruce's intro was a little clunky? You're going to tell me this book was smooth as silk? No, I'm pretty sure you're going to tell me to wait for your review next week. Okay, seriously, no shit Bruce Wayne doesn't need an introduction, but no shit he does. Christ, where was the scene where Bruce and Vicki meet up at the circus? THAT was the moment I was waiting for. Miller gives Lee 8000 splashes in a 20-page comic--he couldn't spare one for our hero? Of course the folks reading this book will know who Bruce Wayne is, but they shouldn't have to!! The rules are different for issue #1. Someone should be able to pick this book up fresh and go. I know that's hard to do considering Batman is everywhere, but them's the breaks. Otherwise, I think it's careless writing that takes the audience for granted.
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Jul 15, 2005 10:15:36 PM CDT
El Vale, I intend to represent the moderates on the WALKING DEAD
by dave_f
I was onboard it at first, lost a bit of interest later, but still find it to be one of the superior examples of the horror genre in comics. And fairly consistantly surprising. I just wish it had a smaller cast and a little less Bendis-style monologuing at times. So like I said, I'll be representing the moderates.
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I'm in the process of watching the Justice League cartoon in its entirety (minus 4 episodes), and damn, is it good. Special thanks to my brother who recorded it off of cartoon network (I have no cable). I love Batman the Animated Series, but JL really delivers. Right now I have Starcrossed and the first Unlimited DVD to watch. If any of you geeks haven't seen it, all I can say is try to get your paws on it any way you can. I've only seen a couple of episodes of Superman, but, seeing as how my bro has the first box of that, I don't think it'll be too long before I get a little Kryptonian action. It's really heartening that Warner Bros seems to be treating their comic properties with a little respect, and I hope it continues. I know there are exceptions (see just about anything based on Alan Moore's work), but it seems like DC is set to steal the comic movie crown from Marvel. Batman is back on track, Wonder Woman is in the hands of a perennial geek favorite, Superman could honestly go either way, but I have a little faith in Singer. It's a good time to be a comic geek. If I had one wish, it would be a totally kick-ass Legion of Superheroes cartoon. Just let Warner animation take what was learned with Justice League and then turn it up to 11. You know it would rock.
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When the first season disappointed me, I bailed, but I hear that it's really good under the new JUSTICE LEAGUE UNLIMITED aegis, and the one or two episodes I've seen seem to bear this out. The one I remember had Green Arrow and Black Canary trying to pull Wildcat (voiced by Dennis Farina) out of the underground metahuman boxing scene. Was really good - strong action AND strong characterization. So I'm looking to borrow TiVo'ed tapes from friends soon and keeping my fingers crossed. It sounds like JLU might be closer to what I want from DC's heroes than the actual comics.
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There were a couple of episodes later that had me asking "This is aimed at kids too, right?" Especially the Dr. Fate/Aquaman/Solomon Grundy ep that has Grundy basically tearing his way into a Cthulhu-type creature's head and randomly ripping organic stuff out. The League toon really had much better action that Batman TAS did. Oddly enough, JL showcased Batman's skills better than his own show did. The fights in JL get surprisingly brutal sometimes. And Michael Ironsides was born to be the voice of Darkseid. On the topic of voices, there were some really neat actors that lent their talents. Clancey Brown, the aforementioned Michael Ironsides, Micael Jai White, and the guy whose name I can't ever remember (President Palmer from 24), among others. Now I'm really looking forward to Unlimited. I hope Warners continues to release their toons in box sets, because even friggin Teen Titans is pretty darn good.
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Yeah i have no problem with the moderates, in fact your problem with the book is shared by most critics with whom it still rates pretty high. I have a problem with the unintelligent haters-for-no-legitimate-reason. And may i urge you to stop calling me "EL vale" and just call me Vale? Sounds like clunky spanish when you say stuff like "Hey El Vale--". Oh and i think it's funny so many people claim DC's gonna start kicking Marvel's ass in terms of movies what with recent Marvel endeavors being pretty lame...and still all you hear and read is the FF movie making more money than Batman, being fun, making you want to buy comics...as compared to that "depressing" Batman flick. It's kinda like everyone saying HoM sucks and the DC crossover stuff being much much better...and yet all anyone really talks about is HoM. HoM this and HoM that and generally it's pretty negative but still...all press is good press right?
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How do you guys decide who gets to review a book like All star Batman?
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won't make more $$ than batman when its all said and done....wedding crashers was funny as hell and should reap in some good dough and wonka ain't no slouch either...peace
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Yep. It's true. Sucks that a great cartoon like JLU isn't getting renewed. Never much took to the Legion books but I'm open minded enough to check it out when it finally does air. I sent Herc the story several days ago. Dunno why he never posted it...
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I guess I'll have to get cable now.
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why do you hate el vale? and um, why is the internet still working? i thought bendis broke it?
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I'm reaching here, but I was going to say that when I discovered Powers I loved it for a long time, but that I like Bendis less as he becomes more popular and his work is all "big event." Then I was thinking it's like when a really cool indie director goes commercial and still makes a'ight movies, but the coolness isn't there. And then I thought of Christopher Nolan from Memento to Batman, and I thought maybe there was a parallel. Or maybe not. And the JLU cartoon is intense! Clancy Brown's Luthor voice is great, and the uncovering of Luthor setting up the satellite "attack" on Cadmus was heavy! Made me like the question.
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Jul 16, 2005 1:38:23 PM CDT
FF isn't making more money than Batman. And a LONG list of v
by the heathen
Vale, FF isn't making more money than Batman. Batman opened on a Wed., brought in $46 mil over the weekend, and $77 mil in 5 days since when it opened Wednesday. It's total is now at $177 mil, and the % drop off hasn't gone over 50% yet. As of July 14th FF has made $77 mil. That's two days more (7 days) than when Batman was at $77 mil. And mark my words, FF will have a significant drop off. People are talking about HoM because it's actually out now. It's only the "Countdown" for DC's Infinite Crisis right now (which I am more excited about). As for JLU characters voices: Dennis Haysbert (Pres Palmer) is Kilowog, Xander Berkley (George Mason from 24) is General Brak, Robert Englund is Felix Faust, John Rhys-Davies is Lord Hades, Eric Roberts is Mongul, Powers Boothe is Grodd, Virginia Madsen is Dr. Sarah Corwin, Tom Sizemore as Metamorpho, Keith David is Despero, Rob Zombie is Ichthulhu, Tom Everett Scott is Booster Gold, Jeremy Piven is Elongated Man, John C. McGinley is The Atom, Gina Torres is Vixen, Adam Baldwin is Jonah Hex, Morena Baccarin (GORGEOUS!) is Black Canary, Amy Acker is Huntress, not only is Ioan Gruffudd Mr Fantastic but also Mr. Miracle, and Jason Bateman is Hermes. AND that's not even naming them all. My favorite cartoon has actors from my favorite shows 24, Arrested Development, and the Buffyverse shows.
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where was Schleppy's review of FF? Did he hate it that much? I KNOW he must have something to say about Alba's pooper. Schleppy?
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I wish I'd thought of that! But having read most of ASB&R in the shop, I was so disgusted that I wasn't thinking of anything that cool... And Master WATERWORLD Script Doctor, Bruce's introduction was fine with me. I didn't even touch on it in my review because there was so much wrong with the comic that I needed to yell at the Boyz about. It was economic story telling. Didja see WITNESS? Harrison Ford's character didn't show up until Kelly McGillis and the Kid were at the police station. Didja see RAIDERS OF THE LOST ARK? We didn't see Indy getting off the plane at the Lima Airport, hire Doc Ock and his brother as guides, etc. We also didn't see him go to archeology school or come out of his Mom's uterus. What could Bruce and Vicky meeting at the circus have added? Granted, we didn't need all the posing by Vicki. Maybe Lee just does what he does, but it's kinda condescending. But what we're talking about isn't bad storytelling. It's just not spelling everything out for us, as, cough, some writers do. Be honest. You have a problem with it because it isn't what Bendis would do. Frank Miller has all kinds of his own weaknesses as a writer; Jim Lee has just about every conceivable kind of weakness as storyteller. Why heap one of Bendis' weaknesses on top of that? Now, before you swallow your own uvula, I feel I must once again state that I don't hate Bendis. I'm rereading FORTUNE & GLORY, my favorite work of his, and having my usual great time. Hell, I know you didn't get my review (I know we're not supposed to say it, but if it's true, why the hell not?)but the actual review part was positive about HOUSE O' M # 3...Finally,: Hey, El Vale, we @$$holes decide who doe what review by a free for all fight in a steel cage each week. You'd think the same guy would win each time, but we're allowed to bring in any weapons and dirty tricks we want.
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f4 bombed!....it made like 6.7 or something mil this weekend...dropped off 69% prolly cuz it was mediocre to say the least....and batman is still making nice coin.
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Is anyone reading Mnemovore? The shop I go to consistently sells it out, but I hardly see any discussion of it. Personally, I think it's damn fine storytelling. Creepy, atmospheric art and a plot that gives you just enough crumbs to keep you coming back. I must know what the hell is going on. I hope the last issue delivers big time. Sometimes books like this one give me the last issue jitters, you know? Will it satisfy? Will it piss me off with its mediocrity? At the very least, it has me anticipating the next issue.....And Seven Soldiers ain't no slouch either. I just hope Morrison can keep it up.
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Jul 16, 2005 9:13:54 PM CDT
the very best Batman related news ever: Paul Pope and Batman set
by gus nukem
spotted on Comicon.com/pulse ***
http://tinyurl.com/7kukf ***
I cannot express my joy. (I should copy-paste the whole interview, for every AICN-comics-talkbacker to read, but you should use the link instead.)
Friends of excellent comics, Batman-/superhero-/Paul Pope-/-philes, rejoice! -
well this whole article is full of exciting ... stuff, so go check it out. What if... F.M. had written a script with Paul Pope as the artist?
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Jul 16, 2005 9:26:11 PM CDT
other great Batman-related news : Grant Morrison on Det. Comics
by gus nukem
along with a Kubert, jr. (sorry for not remembering who)
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... and All-Star Superman announced for November release
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I thought i was lovable
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Thanks for clarifying. I'd read FF was the only summer movie to do better than last year's batch (initially). I guess word of mouth must be killing it then.
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Long live this TalkBack! Quick shots: MNEMOVORE is pretty good stuff, but after issue three I started to get worried it was gonna end sloppily. Haven't read #4 yet, though (that's the new one, right?). My favorite part is in the first issue when they really had to pull to get the octo-starfish sumbitch out of the guy's nose. Most painful-looking thing I've seen in a comic in ages. Generally happy with the paranoid vibe, too, which is a favorite quality of various horror stories for me. ***** Paul Pope on BATMAN 100 is the only Batman project I've looked forward to in ages, and the preview art knocked me on my ass! Gus, I'm testing out a news feature in the column next week that'll be a no-nonsense round-up of all the major comic news for the week (which happens to be shitloads of stuff in the wake of San Diego). Pope's project will be mentioned along with links to the preview art. The word MUST go out to the faithful. ***** Morrison on DETECTIVE? I've heard this rumor percolating for a while. If it's true, quick - gimme a source! Must confirm, because a Morrison-written DETECTIVE is about the only *other* thing that could get me hyped for the character at the moment. ***** Tim Sizemore as Metamorpho? That's so damn cool I may have to forgive Sizemore's misogyny. Okay, not really. But almost.
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http://tinyurl.com/d3vve It'll keep you up at night, guaranteed.
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Hellyeah, I'm readin' it. I gave the first issue a positive review here, too. I haven't got the newest issue yet cuz I've been too busy to get to the shop in the last week and a half, but so far I really like the series. If I can get in soon enough I'll consider another review, but I'm not making any promises (busy as hell). I definitely dig it, though. Rodionoff gave it a nice little twist by having an amnesiac trying to figure out if the world is just her old world she doesn't remember or one where shit has actually gone very, very wrong. I definitely dig that aspect, among others. A cool new concept for a mini from Vertigo, which is what they need much more of.
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As soon as you guys read issue 4, you'll understand why I'm pretty hyped for the end. There are some creepy as hell developments, especially with "alcoholic advertising guy". When the final issue comes out, I'm gonna read the whole thing together so I can get a feel for the story as a whole. I'll always be a single issue man, but a story like this makes me understand why many people like to go the all-trade route these days. Speaking of trade collections, was anyone else disappointed with the WE3 collection? Pretty damn bare-bones if you ask me. I was hoping for a sketchbook, or at least some sort of interview or exposition on the process Morrison and especially Quitely went through when deciding how to tell that story. I'm guessing (and hoping) for a double-dip deluxe edition in the future.
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doesn't die until i or gus deem it dead...um...perhaps LAST?
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We should keep it alive until wednesday
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can't keep dumbledore alive though ahem...and i need to go to baranquilla.
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My girlfriend's from Cartagena
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just came back from san diego and man it was the shit! i only went for the day cuz this was a busy weekend for me but i met matt wagner-he said no mage 3 yet because its too personal for him to be able to just spit it out but he is about to start a 12 issue arc on batman. i gotta admit i was a bit star strucj and made kind of an ass of myselfr but ive always loved mage and in the morning before we left for san diego i was debating beinging my hardcover of the hero discovered and ended up leaving it because i though i wouldnt run into him. also talked to david mack for a bit and man he is a hell of a nice guy. talked to whedon briefly but the man has groupies like a movie star no joke so it was hard to elbow past all the girls and i didnt want to be a cockblocker.all in all it was fun tho. i havent been to comic con in something like 13 years even tho i live in cali. mnevore fans:my brother bought a cool t shirt that has a cthullu graphic,u know the tentacles and the whole bit and it says "KFC,kids for cthullu,tentacle licking good." its very sweet. thats all for me just keeping this tb alive with a bit of a buzz going on. lets keep it going til wednesdays new one! Me vas a ayudar Vale?
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from baranquilla, i'd just like to go back ha...i live in the states man...and LAST me thinks.
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Jul 18, 2005 11:47:15 AM CDT
If you guys don't ban that fucking asshole moviemack for bei
by mrboinfoint
I'll rip the internet in half. I'm joking of course, but Jesus, has anybody out there in Moderator Land taken a look at what this two-bit punkass bitch has been stirring up lately? Personal attacks, off-topic B.S., constantly ripping on everything just to incite a reaction, now he's gone all homophobic (blatant hate-speech, anyone?) to boot. He's broken nearly every single one of the Talkback rules. And he
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and man i was buzzing!
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Jul 18, 2005 1:32:53 PM CDT
El Vale, the weekend that FF debuted was the first week in I thi
by the heathen
So you weren't entirely incorrect. But that was considering ALL the movies that are out (not just FF), but no problem. Yeah FF had a 59.5% drop in attendance and Batman is at 43% (still hasn't gone below 50%)
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I'm loving his stuff on Desolation Jones. Issue #2 was a good read. I loved the character of Emily and how Jones and her interacted. J.H. can draw emotion really well. I know it's been popular to be hating Jim Lee on this talkback, but I still like the guy. I know there will probably be a lot more of this on Wed. And by the way
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I re-read All Star again just to see. He crashed the batmobile right through 'em! It would have been nice if "They always catch me" , "How cool is that?" , and err, whatever that third thing is that Batman kept repeating were left out. Or only used once, by one person. Let's keep it going guy's
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but i dindt want to go through that clunky ass dialogue again.i htink we can keep it going till this weeks column.whos with me?
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Don't reread it, just look at the last few pages of Batman creaming the cops.
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he completely wipes them out! and how did robin survive that shit to be able to be drafted?man i wanted this book to be good! i had such high hopes! i hope AS superman doesnt disapoint like this did
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Maybe they can be all Bendis-like and have a turn around in overall quality? Maybe? Hopefully? In other news, Peter David is going to be writing a new X-Factor book, and David Finch is penciling the Moon Knight: The Bottom mini, while Frank Cho will do two issues of New Avengers (14 & 15). And I think Stephen King may be writing something for Marvel.
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Claro q voy a ayudar! Can anyone give me an example of why that moviemack guy sucks? There's hatred for him in other threads as well. Oh and the king of Spain may be writing something for Marvel
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after that first issue i wont be coming back for # 2 so keep me posted if it gets any better.a new x-factor written by peter david sounds very cool. i was a fan of the original series. david finch on moon knight sounds sweet too. he is one of my current fave pencillers. as far as stephen king? he kind of fell off in my book. i was a HUGE stephen king and dark tower fan but the way he closed off the series,ignoring things that had been setup previously and basically in what felt like a very rushed manner turned me off of mister king. he has to come with something amazing for me to become a fan again after the huge letdown that was the dark tower 7.
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rob liefeld most underrated artist ever!
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from what i recall just from lurking on other talkbacks he basically comes across like a very opinionated dick but he has also been known to go into personal attacks on people that disagree with him.ive never had an argument with him but it seems he feels his opinion is the only valid one. he was a huge basher of batman begins i do remember that.
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u wont be last with that kind of thing coming out of your mouth mister!
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He basically hates everything and trolls the talkbacks. He does get personal too. Apparently he is a big Batman fan to the point of hating everything that is Batman for at least the last decade. He's also a racist homophobe and is trolling around on the Superman Returns ComiCon and JLU talkbacks about how Singer and the writers are gay and how early 90's comics were the best ever. He also likes the FF movie. Go figure.
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He write crime capers and such. Haven't read any of his stuff personally, but of course Joey Q. is saying it's the best stuff he's read from a non-comic writer. Maybe so? I'd like to see it kick some ass, but you never know about this internet holding up with it breaking in half and what not.
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joe q is a huge hype machine so hopefully it will be cool.i dig the moon knight character.they just introduced the ultimate version over on Ult spidey so lets see how that turns out. ive been picking up the new warriors mini and while the premise is kinda weak im diggin the hell out of the art! i know its kinda manga and cartoony but for some reason i really like it. i cant wait for a trade on this. oh and heathen just fyi, when u call vale "El Vale" its the same as if i called u "The Heathen" all the time. the "el" is basically the male form of "The" in spanish.
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Jul 18, 2005 4:12:09 PM CDT
The most overrated, overused, overshitty PRACTICE in comics
by fuzzyjefe
is the 6-issue story-arc. Hell, man, just write the stupid thing already, and let it fit where it will. I know trades are a big piece of coin for companies, but I'm sick of it. I long for the day this trend is cycled out.
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Jul 18, 2005 4:18:38 PM CDT
Yeah I know Kal-El, I was just being formal I guess. (Apolagies
by the heathen
My girl is half Latin and I took my two years of Espanol in high school, but let's not talk about what grades I got. I did call El Vale "Vale" in an earlier post about my rant on Batman Begins Vs. FF at the box-office. With respect - El Heathen.
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i actually like the trade format a lot! im actually tired of the single issue format myself
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I like when writers just write for the long hall. Year long story arcs aren't as bad, but I know what you mean. Walking Dead is a good example of not doing "part" stories. What other series are?
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I will continue to hold the line then. Good day.
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Fables, Y the Last Man, 100 Bullets, Preacher, Sandman, Hellblazer, Bone, Cerebus, Transmetropolitan, Supreme Power (six-issue arcs in name only), Planetary....see a pattern? A whole lot of Vertigo, and just about anything where one writer is telling one long story. Usually the best comics has to offer, in my opinion. The stories where dead is dead, actions have real repercussions, and characters are usually richer for all that. I like me some superhero fare, but I'll usually trade 50-60 years of continuity for about 5-6 years of good story. I know writers are essentially limited in what they can do with established characters, but to add what amounts to a mandate to fit stories into a set number of issues has really impacted the quality of comics. It's a money-grabber. Paying for 6 issues of a story that should be 2 or 3 is shenanigans. And Darth, being a fan of the trades is no bad thing. It's more cost-effective for sure. It's just I've been reading comics for almost 30 years now, and single issues is how I go. Of course, that cost-effective angle is mighty tempting.
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now that u mention it those are all books that i enjoy and enjoyed imensely as single issues and also went back and purchased as trades. i guess it depends.a book like 100 bullets for example ill get evry single month and then reread them when i buy the trade but MK spider man i only pick up as a trade. i dont know ive been collecting for about 14 years and i prefer the trade format but i see your point. no offense meant heathen i was just clarifying cuz i know vale brought it up in an earlier post.dont worry well be here holding it down
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thats awesome! i love latino women above all but i can deal with any flavor as long as theyre cool people.and of course looks play a part as well.we need more women like dizzy cordova or the detective from gotham central in comics representing strong latino women
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First of all: Joe Q. I know he gets a lot of shit for being a hype machine but i think it's all very enthusiastic and fun. Like with Young Avengers for example...he hyped the shit out of that one and what happened? The book had a shot at surviving cause everyone bought it trying to prove Quesada wrong. I also agree with Fuzzy about the Vertigo books. The quality is fantastic. I think what Marvel's MAX line is missing is vision, a la Karen Berger. And latin women...i like them non latin looking. I like'em white and blonde and blue eyed. I think Jlo is hedious, that's what your average maid looks like here in Colombia. Oh well entre gustos no hay disgustos
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u lucky bastard! our maids in ecuador look like ass but theyre very nice ladies.see i know what u mean about blonde blue eyed latin women but i prefer the darker variety.i think j-lo is amazing.women like her and eva mendez. what do u think of sofia vergara? shes columbian right?i think our most famous lady besides lorena bobbit is christina aguilera and then shes only half ecuadorian. and i agree about young avanegers! man that book kicks ass.
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Yeah i've had a couple maids who looked kinda like j lo...same type of face and dark skin and what have you. Sofia Vergara's very very hot actually. Again not my type (see Nicole Kidman for that) but beeeautiful ti...female atributes. I didn't know Bobbit was ecuatoriana. Scary lady
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yeah thats totally my type! i like blonde white looking chicks too but i prefer dark latin women. yeah she is ecuadorian unfortunately.i hate to think of my country women as dick chopping crazies.
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hawkeye lives motherfucker!
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Like a lot of Marvel "experiments", it just seems like an attempt to emulate someone else's better, well-executed idea. In this case, Vertigo. I like some Marvel books, mind you, but ground-breaking they ain't. The Ultimate line is about the freshest idea they've had in a long time, and some would say it's a twenty-years-late take on DC's crisis revamps. Marvel has always seemed to me to be like a big hollywood studio: churning out big spectacle after big spectacle. Their heroes have always had a more fallible and human side, but they are the summer popcorn gee-whiz comic company. DC seemed to realize that, and diversified. They didn't half-ass it, and it worked. You can almost smell the half-heartedness of Max. True, I've heard Garth Ennis's Punisher is the bee's knees, but Alias went mainstream and Supreme Power is about to. Comic companies are businesses, yes, but you can really tell that Marvel is all about the bottom line. How many ill-concieved new series has the House of Ideas launched and cancelled in the last 5 years? The last 10? This seems to have turned into a Marvel-bash, but I'm not really anti-Marvel. It does seem that they have been trying for quality a LITTLE bit more the last few years. But when you have an imprint that lets really talented guys and gals run free, great comics are often the result. Hell, Image has had success diversifying the last few years. Walking Dead, The Gift, Sea of Red, Rex Mundi, etc. Marvel needs to really commit to more ecclectic fare. The End.
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I bet Bendis is sitting in front of his computer and laughing his ass off having succeeded in making people talk about Hawkeye. Suddenly the guy pops up in a cover and it's news. The hell?!
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an excellent comic. What else is there to hold that line? It would be *A SHAME* if the MAX line was cancelled and Punisher returned to its *Knights* status.
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and vergara is pretty damn hot...and gus love shis marvel max punisher, which is a good book to be sure.
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i kind of fell off punisher books a few years ago. it just all seemed to repetitive. i dont kow i much prefer the vertigo books to what max offers so i dont think it would affect me too much if max was cancelled.
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Does that mean they're moving Havok and Polaris and finally putting adjectiveless "X-Men" to rest? That could only be a good thing. As good as Milligan is, and as solid as his arc-and-a-half has been so far, I'm afraid the damage that Austen wrought cannot be undone. And Larocca is also unsalvagable, having been directly associated with two of the worst series in the past four years. I'm sorry, but whenever I look at his work, I automatically think of over-written, badly characterized, padded nonsense. The basic fact is that Marvel shouldn't be coming out with new books unless they get rid of the saggy ones that survive just because readers buy them out of habit. Then again, I don't pay any attention to the business side, or ever even look at an issue of Wizard, or come within 1000 feet of comic cons (I filed a restraining order against them), so maybe you people know something I don't.
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Punisher Born, Punisher: the End (unbelievable comic) and 303 (this is from Avatar Press; 4 of 6 have been shipped so far). Great for [war comics (and/or) Ennis-writing] lovers.
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and i think it was around that time i stopped reading punisher books.maybe ill give them a try again. i picked up 303 0 and i liked it but now a days i have so many single issues lying around that i just prefer to wait for the trade. at least that way when im done reading if i dont want to keep it i can unload it on amazon.speaking of which im still trying to sell pretty much my whole collection of comics from the past 6 years so if any of u guys need anything drop me a line and ill see if i have it
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I think the saggy titles that survive just because readers buy them out of habit must translate into good dollars for Marvel...dollars they don't have to spend on advertising, trying to figure out how to sell a new book in a difficult market. I don't know too much about the business side of it either, so i might be talking out of my ass...it just sounds like common sense to me. I'm a HUGE Ennis fan but i've only read Preacher (my favourite comic) and Darkness (Ugh) so i'm not well versed in Ennis comics...i just know he wrote the best damn thing i've ever read. If i could i'd give Punisher a try.
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I ordered the whole series from my LCS and they started with #1. Oh, boy! What if I've missed #0? Anyway, 303 is the best war comic I've ever read and perhaps the best war comic ever.
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1.) READ the Paul Pope interview at comicon.com/pulse at * http://tinyurl.com/7kukf * That is why Paul Pope is a genius and why this will be the best Batman ever. IMO, probably the best superhero story ever, along with All-Star Superman. 2.) LITG first broke the rumour on Morrison writing 'Tec some 4 weeks ago. Two weeks later, he confirmed this as true. Look for these news items at the LITG archives at CBR. Rich Johnston has always be proven a valid source for comics news.
PS El Vale is a filthy swine for deliberately misspelling my nick on a subject title of his. I hate you with an unrelenting unholy passion, you ne'er do-gooder, you... -
If that proves invalid, 'lo! this talkbacker deserves the mantle of ULTIMACY!
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but it might just have been a preview issue. ill check when i get home and let u know gus. wow guys we have kept this thing alive!just 2 more days til the new column
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One of the best Batman artists of all time has passed away. Story is on Newsarama. He was the artist on the Death and the family arc.
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I went back and read every subject line i'd written to prove you wrong. Of course i came upon the GAS thing and i can tell you with all honesty it was NOT deliberate; i mean it's not even clever! Is the new column being published tomorrow or is it late this week?
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Hawkeye lives motherfucker! The hell? I've never read any Ennis books, but I'm always interested in what I hear. The Punisher always has me curious, but I usually resist the urge to buy. Maybe I'll pick up afew trades. I'm broke as it is right now. I don't see MAX lasting long either. Supreme Power was perfect as a MAX title, and not just for the nudity, but for the language and the most kick-ass fights I've seen in a comic. SP has that edge and I think it will be lost moving to MKnights. Kal-El, I love my Latin goddess going on 6+ years and she is definitely sweet on the eyes and the nicest person too! I'm as white as Willy Wonka, but I try. I live in North Central Florida. You guys are lucky to have maids that look like JLo. How's the weather in Colombia and Ecuador? It is humid as hell in Fl.
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I read that last night and thought it was great. I'm actually liking Catman? Ms. Simone you are awesome. It was pretty gruesome too. The needles that amplify pain being stuck in the eyes and Deadshot at the end was pretty entertaining stuff. I'm actually liking all of the Countdown Minis so far.
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mr. aparo...and i'm looking forward to what paul pope is gonna do with the bat.
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thats awesome about the latin goddess man!i actually have uncles through marriage who are white as willy wonka but fell in love with latin godesses.now we have a bunch of white kids that speak fluent spanish at the family gatherings.its great im all for diversity. i actually live in california but im ecuadorian. the weather right now is hot as hell.i just went outside for lunch and its pushing 105! i was thinking im going to try a few punisher trades since evryone keeps recomending it.i was reading supreme power but i just couldnt get into it so i dropped it from my pull list.i loved midnight nation but this moved a bit too slow for me.i was looking at the books i read and i actually dont buy any max stuff at all right now.i used to love garth ennis on the preacher but when i read max punisher it seemed like the same wacky characters but in the marvel u so i gave it up. maybe its time to come back and check them out.
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Jul 19, 2005 6:38:24 PM CDT
I may know why you couldn't get into Supreme Power Kal-El.
by the heathen
From what I hear it is dreadful with delays. I myself kept hearing such good things about it that I read the hardcover edition with issues 1-12. Reading them straight through was pretty awesome. Good point that Fuzzyjefe made about it being one writer with one long cohesive story. The humidity here is what really gets to me. I step outside and begin to sweat. 105 is crazy, it was like 96-97 here today.
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i actually bought the first 12 issues but one day i was at the comic store and i was like 'why do i buy this again?i dont even remeber what happend last month!'so i dropped it. altho i havent read them all at once.i should try that just to see if it changes my view. lately i just get the bare minimums on a monthly basis and prefer to just wait for the trade.not really so much for the money but because i like to have the whole story all at once.yeah its kinda humid here too but not as bad as florida im sure. what kills u is the sun!i have a jeep warnagler and im currently sporting the top down so the direct sunlight burns me up.i need to put the bikini top back on.how is the weather in colombia vale?
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altho Warnagler would be a cool name for an SUV too
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Jul 19, 2005 6:55:24 PM CDT
Such things as the weather are of no concern to Vale when he has
by the heathen
Seriously though, how is the weather in Colombia? Can anybody tell me why I should bye another issue of The Gift? Talk about a slow build. And it's bi-monthly.
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He really did put an awesome Batman on the page.
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I get what you mean about reading the story all at once Kal. Sites like this make it hard for my greedy fingers not to spoil anything while waiting though.
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If you wanna try Ennis you can't go wrong with Preacher. It's the more mature work i've probably ever read, some of the best characters in comics, great dialogue, my favourite romance ever, laughs and chills and whatnot all grounded in a story full of subtext and metaphor that people seem to look over. And Steve Dillon provides the best acting in comics with his art. Sure there's also whacky characters and ultra violence but that's just a small part of it. Oh and it has the best villain ever. The weather where i live, Bogota (central Colombia) is pretty much the same all year...cold and dry. Not cold cold, but you do need to wear a warm jacket if you're going out most of the time. My family is VERY white, most of them blonde and blue/green eyed. Except me, i got the short end of that stick.
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I LOVE that type of weather, cool and dry. Your family sounds wonderful too. Perhaps I'll pick up a trade of Preacher. Is Ennis doing anything with the movie Punisher Thomas Jane comic book wise? I thought I heard something about them creating a comic together.
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I don't know about Ennis. And yes there's an abundance of jlos over here but like i said i don't find her attractive so it don't distract me much. If there were Nicole Kidmans around every corner i'd be a happy boy indeed. And stay away from my family!
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And, err, sorry about the family thing. I like Tom Jane and his enthusiasm, hope it helps for that Punisher sequel.
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I don't have to work and I may be able to get to my local Mega Comics when everything is released tomorrow. Will HoM #4 be decent two issues in a row? Will Defenders #1 make us laugh? Will we learn more of the girls girls in Girls #3? And will Astonishing X-Men #11 continue to astonish? All these questions and more starting tomorrow. Same bat place. Same bat channel. I'm out
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and who is with me on this? I cannot believe how much thought, designs, concepts are behind this project and may be invisible to the casual reader. I cannot recommend 303 enough. The writing is top-notch, the script fun and visceral (as in, related to human innards) and relevant. IMO Ennis at his best (and that's from an Ennis connoisseur). The art is top-notch as well. Jacen Burrows delivers. Geof Darrow-good. Read it, even if you have to rent your souls to some sleazy lower demons for months.
PS El Vale, it's ok ... buddy. I send my Michael Jackson-like hugs to your children and the rest of your family. -
This is the strangest damn thing I've written in a long, long time.
It's the story of a rifle, first and foremost, a .303 calibre Lee Enfield bolt-action rifle, almost a hundred years old but none the worst for it. This was the weapon that took the British army through two world wars and survived in its service until long after the second; it still shows up today from time to time, carried by tribesmen and guerrilla fighters in some of the world's most brutal conflicts. The Lee Enfield is one of the great success stories of killing technology; it's simple to use, what flaws it possesses are few and far between, and it'll withstand a good deal of very rough treatment indeed before it stops doing what it says on the tin.
This particular Lee Enfield, however, is not just some artefact long overdue for retirement. High in the war-ravaged mountains of Afghanistan, the rifle falls into the hands of a man who plans to do the unthinkable: who sets out on a journey across whole continents, who fights his way through killing grounds both terrible and unexpected, all so he can fire a single bullet at the most important target in the world.
303 begins as a war story, but changes halfway through into something I'm still not certain of myself. This is odd territory we're traversing, where the past pushes its warriors into the present with murderous intent, aiding and abetting destiny by means of numerous unwitting agents. It's the tale of a soldier who's been fighting for nothing all his life, but now believes he's found his purpose, and the one man who can stop him, a worn-out hero filled with fatal sadness. But it's also the tale of two great countries, one locked in long and terrible decline, one with a sickness in its heart; and the champions who do battle for their nations in the dark and secret places no one ever goes.
If I had to sum it up in one line, I'd say 303 was inspired by my fears for the world.
Right now I've scripted a little over half the story, and like I say, it isn't going where I thought it might. I thought about writing it as a novel, but I love comics, I believe in comics, and I still believe you can do absolutely anything with them- so a comic book it is. I'm extremely fortunate to have the excellent Jacen Burrows drawing the story for me; if you've enjoyed his work with Alan Moore and Warren Ellis, you'll know exactly what I mean. Jacen's producing some of his finest work to date on this book, and with the complete creative freedom available at Avatar Press, you'll be glad to hear that neither he nor I will have to pull our punches. Which comes in handy, believe me, when you realize that a story's taking you places you've never been before.
And you're supposed to be writing it.
Garth Ennis
Brooklyn, May 2004 -
from * http://tinyurl.com/97ejb *
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Got me really excited for the project. At first it didn't seem all that important, but reading his thoughts...yeah it's gonna fucking rock
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303 sounds interesting...and bogota weather always depressed me...sometimes reminds of me or rainy seattle at times. and paul pope aped my art style...that is if i could draw...which i can't...but i got to be better than some of the assholes here.
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on el pibe and pablo book now...with rene higuita as well...gonna sell like um...stuff maybe.
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i think i will check this out.ive always been a garth ennis fan so im surprised i havent gotten to it yet. oh and gus i actually do own a copy of 30 #0.i checked it and it says its a zero issue.
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perhaps 8 pages from #1 ? Or otherwise unpublished stuff ?
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tennapel to be underrated...i dig the guys stuff.
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um LAST!
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is LAST!
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well theatrically the hobbit comes last...whenever it gets out of that legal tango...oh...what was the sayings? um...LAST!
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this cat is back. And LAST of all things.
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i am however last like an uwe boll flick.
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LAST
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and leave me be LAST!
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el vale into our dance gus? did you? and stopo..who's that? and yes LAST!
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Cause i'm LAST. No one can stopo me!
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you've been stopped...last! bitches.
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who's last now, amateurs ?
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Is it?
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NOW! LAST! I!
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You're LAST.
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i kinda miss when it was just you and me battling for the honor of the fabled LAST post...but now we have a LAST CRASHER...i miss the honor of our battles...which always ended with your defeat, but you were always a worthy oppenent...oh one last thing...LAST.
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i shall advance :) LAST and um, i need a cookie.
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don't you people ever learn? Don't you ever stop? Like this thread will, now... LAST!
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gus you do realize this makes me LAST....enjoy...being second to last though.
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let's put this sucker ( this particular thread ) on fire! LAST!
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i guess it has finally happened...i remember weeks ago during our continued battle that you suggested we infect the talkback with it and well this has been the finest example of that infection, if infections are fine that is...oh just to let you know...um...LAST!
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You guys are good
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seasoned vets at this...battling for the last post...a two man game whcih usually ends with gus' defeat. either way it's a good show.
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I mean thus. LAST! owned! Blackthought, I wasn't referring only to the comics threads. And just one apprentice (El Vale), doesn't qualify as a sceptic shock to me.
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I'm more of a competitor, haven't you noticed?
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for you, I am LAST!
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i did think you meant the whole site my friend, but you have to start somewhere, thats why i mentioned this talkback...and i don't know how we got an apprentice...i guess it's hard not to follow our glorious lead :)...and gus, for you and your family, i remain LAST!...mr. penultimate.
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and that is what I am feeling for the pre-last hacks and usurpers of the ultimate place. BY THE POWER OF GREYSKULL, I AM LAST!
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this whole tribute to lance armstrong is pretty poor...isn't the yellow jersey yellow? when did it become piss urine? anyway i almost just thought that you deserved the last post for evoking the power of greyskull...that's heavy stuff...but then i realized i had a huge stock of gummiberry juice...so now i'm bouncing here and there and everywhere to last place...LAST!
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the Green Lanterns' oath? ... Anyway Klytus, I am bored. Let's leave it at that, shan't we? LAST!
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last my man, see ya.
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LAST!
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LAST!...for the needy children...you must respect that...right?
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to the coolest guy, in the LAST ROW! LAST!
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i like being the coolest guy...LAST :)
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To wait until everyone thinks it's over and shout LAST
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I learn from my opponents. LAST !
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that learning person thingy and i'm um LAST!
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I remember your reply had it ? How was it altered ?
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all my posts from a certain time vanished, i have no clue why? AICN is fucking me, or it's bendis breaking the internet for me....either way something is going down.
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Right here on this talkback?
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the, as always penultimate, blackthought had posted a feeble answer in the lines of : "like a Kansas team, I am last!" And some SOB deleted the said comment. Zatanna-time: TSAL!
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Like a Kansas team, i am LAST!
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my posts got deleted in a lot of talkbacks for some reason....anyway i'm gonna pull a catman and join this TB LAST as he did with the secret six, so LAST my friends.
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I DECLARE MYSELF LAST. THOU SHALL CEASE PESTERING ME.
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your message goes unheeded...LAST!
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LAST! (you were expecting 'done that' - didntcha ? )
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last,....done that no....LAST!
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