Movie News

By Golly - Gee Whillikers! Santiago Segura is releasing TORRENTE 3 in Spain This Year!!!

Published at: May 21, 2005, 5:09 p.m. CST by staff

Hey folks, Harry here! So I write a bit about TORRENTE 2 coming to DVD in the United States, gripe about there being no Region 1 DVD of TORRENTE: THE STUPID ARM OF THE LAW... and I wildly heaped enthusiastic praise upon the man genius of Santiago Segura - one of the funniest men to ever cast a large shadow upon the face of the Earth. I wrote about and suggested the film just out of pure love for the two TORRENTE films and because I'm well aware that the genius of Segura's two TORRENTE films is basically completely unknown in the English Speaking world, because... well, no U.S. distributor was bright enough to bring them here! Well, yesterday I got an email from Santiago Segura sending me the best news in a good while... TORRENTE 3 is due out in Spain this year, to prove it he sent me the image of the one-sheet and revealed that Guillermo Del Toro was going to be in the theatrical cut, but instead will only be captured on the DVD release... Which the Gods can not make soon enough! Here's the poster... this time, Torrente is retired from the law and is a... bodyguard?!?!?!?! Dear Lord, protect the body he's meant to, cuz Torrente will abuse it like a soft warm wet kitty in the barn back behind the haybales while nobody is looking.







Readers Talkback

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  • May 21, 2005, 5:12 p.m. CST

    first?

    by Jubba

    cool i ain't

  • May 21, 2005, 5:13 p.m. CST

    Ha!

    by kintar0

    That's a fucking awesome spoof of the Batman Begins poster. I hope theaters in the US get this one!

  • May 21, 2005, 5:27 p.m. CST

    abuse it like a soft warm wet kitty in the barn back behind the

    by DutchDrunk

    Enough with the childhood memories already, Harry. I don't know if this stuff is supposed to be funny, but it just puts images in my head of big Harry with a kitty on his lap and...Ugh, I'm gonna go gouge out my eyeballs now.

  • May 21, 2005, 5:43 p.m. CST

    how can you have so much affection for childhood memories? easy

    by HypeEndsHere

    when you don't mature, every fucking thing is nostalgic.

  • May 21, 2005, 5:45 p.m. CST

    Now, watch. we'll get an atricle stating how much Harry loved t

    by HypeEndsHere

    I think it was....something...Ustinov..?

  • May 21, 2005, 6:02 p.m. CST

    Oh w00t3rs

    by FNORDcinco1

    Another Torrente game is probably coming...PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE MAKE IT GOOD!!!

  • May 21, 2005, 8:22 p.m. CST

    Torrente IS pure genius!

    by Frank Black

    I love, love, love the Torrente movies and can't wait for part 3. Thanks to region free DVD, I've been 1 & 2 for years. Santiago is also great in Dying of Laughter.

  • May 22, 2005, 6:06 a.m. CST

    Torrente 3 is coming

    by talbuckin

    with ninjas and all. Sorry for that.

  • May 22, 2005, 6:50 a.m. CST

    exhausted formula, amiguete

    by CuervoJones

    Segura is old news

  • May 22, 2005, 7:19 a.m. CST

    Torrente 2 is one of the funniest films ever...

    by Gordonsalive

    I'm from Marbella so it has special significance to me. When they were filming the nightclub scenes locals were made to believe it was a private three day party for Leonardo di Caprio so we'd stay the hell away.. True Story. And that black guy with dredlocks who jumps in the swimming pool to Torrentes disgust... Pinched the last carton of semi-desnatado milk from me in Mercadona Yesterday. Viva Torrente.

  • May 22, 2005, 10:10 a.m. CST

    Batman Pun

    by Koji Kabuto

    "Torrente Acabao" actually means "Torrente Finished", which coupled to the design work of the poster - a big play on a certain Dark Knight's publicity binge, no?

  • May 22, 2005, 10:33 a.m. CST

    Ashamed

    by TheMorningStar

    As a Spanish filmgoer and aspiring filmmaker, I have always thought "Torrente" was one of the worst films ever produced in this country, or anyone else for that matter. It's quite depressing that one of the highest-grossing Spanish films and its sequels have become such a phenomeon resorting to vulgarity, clich

  • May 22, 2005, 11:03 a.m. CST

    morning star

    by talbuckin

    way to go. Segura is just so 90

  • May 22, 2005, 5:02 p.m. CST

    por cierto, que le den a Amenabar

    by CuervoJones

    puta maricona cansina

  • May 23, 2005, 6:50 a.m. CST

    CuervoJones

    by talbuckin

    pretty clever post. pretty sure you love "filmmakers" like rodriguez or kitamura

  • May 23, 2005, 8:22 a.m. CST

    Directors and stuff

    by TheMorningStar

    I may like "filmmakers" like Rodriguez, as you say. I may like films like Charlie's Angels and Resident Evil just for the chicks. So it's not I'm into Swedish flicks, I *love* blockbusters. I only wanted to point out that Torrente is, in my opinion, as vulgar a film as it can be done, and it is indeed depressing it gets so much money and even PRAISE. As always, it depends on how many friends you have willing to give you money. It bothers me that Spanish filmmakers have to fight for resources and then there is this...SAGA...which gets as much resources as needed. Money invested in vulgarity. And now they want to export it to America. Well, good for you if you want to indulge in this kind of vulgarity. That's what this world seems to love. Y s

  • May 23, 2005, 8:52 a.m. CST

    morning star

    by talbuckin

    actually my post was about that clever comment of cuervo jones about amenabar, not you. I happen to agree with you 100%, and I consider that posts like cuervojones

  • May 23, 2005, 9 a.m. CST

    Talbuckin

    by TheMorningStar

    I know your comment wasn't about me, sorry if it sounded otherwise. Lo que quer

  • May 23, 2005, 9:33 a.m. CST

    morning star

    by talbuckin

    I agree 100% with you. When you say Easi estan las cosas" it is more or less the same than my "que penita" or "estamos en un pais libre", dont you think? of course I am sorry torrente makes so much money, but people is free to do whatever they want with their money, of course. However when someone says something like "amenabar puta maricona cansina", I feel like this fucker has nothing to say about movies. Maybe i was rude to Rodriguez, I admit, but definitely not with Kitamura. And don