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SWEEPS: DAY 11!!AntepenultimateDEADWOOD!!
SPOILER ALERT !!
I am – Hercules!!
Most Americans didn’t see Seth Bullock’s nephew break his back last week. They didn’t see Wolcott butcher a roomful of hookers for kicks. They didn’t see Amos Cochran pull an obstruction out of Al Swearengen’s weiner.
At 9 p.m. Sundays, most people with television sets are watching Terri Hatcher falling through holes in the floor or locking herself out of the house on “Desperate Housewives.” (Which I understand is excellent; the people who hand out those Golden Globes, remember, decided a month or two ago that “Desperate Housewives” was even funnier than Fox’s “Arrested Development.” So I guess that wipes out decades of the Globes’ credibility problems.)
George Hearst is coming to “Deadwood” before season’s end. Did “Housewives” ever disclose why that singsongy hausfrau decided to kill herself in the pilot?
Take up valuable bandwidth with your predictions and reactions.
9 p.m. Sunday. HBO.
Herc’s favorite HBO shows ever -
on season-box sets:
Carnivale
Curb Your Enthusiasm
Deadwood
The Larry Sanders Show
Oz
Six Feet Under
The Sopranos
The Wire
Looking for bumper stickers, plush toys and girls’ underwear covered with cute cartoon double-amputees? Visit The Herc Store!
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Both jarring AND funny. But really it would be better with writing from Whedon and SMG in the cast.
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But you know, of course, they're kinda busy with movie work these days.
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Long Time Reader, First Time Poster....had to chime in on this one..bottom line, Deadwood never fails to exceed my expectations. All aspects from the writing to the cast are just flat out STELLAR...oh, and bring back Carnivale!!!! This is all the justification you need to subscribe to HBO. Better yet, HBO in HD.
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May 08, 2005 9:01:57 PM CDT
C'mon what's a Herc column without biased bashing of shows he "h
by rylrci
Well heck, Mary Sue- I reckon that'd be actual journalism. For fart's sake, that's just not American.
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I watch/ed the following shows all the time. Buffy, Angel, Lost, Battlestar Galactica and Desperate Housewives. One thing Desperate Housewives deserves credit for, whether you like it or not is that mysteries and plot points brought up are so far, resolved quickly instead of dragging on for several years. Hopefully this idea will catch on with other shows. Does anyone know who killed Jordan's mother? Does anyone care???
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The show is really starting to pick up steam. Hopefully, instead of Carnivale, HBO can get and treat the new Star Wars just like Deadwood.
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cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt cocksucker cunt
(at least that's all I'm understanding in the show these days) -
May 08, 2005 10:15:04 PM CDT
I wonder if there could be one goddamn talkback without some coc
by cutest_of_borg
I believe I would fucking puke if Whedon left his stink on Deadwood.
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May 08, 2005 10:23:47 PM CDT
I may be a sinner, but I am not a governmental employee.
by -guyinthebackrow
I paraphrase, Mr. W.
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Ignorant cocksucker.
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What about Greys Anatomy? Great show. Great characters we care about. Where's the talkback about that? Granted Deadwood is stellar, but ABCs got a killer Sunday lineup.
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No mention of Elvis?!?! ... Family Guy wasn't very funny, waaaay too predictable (c'mon, who didn't see Chris falling out the window when the teacher said to 'get down here'?)...American Dad was better this week, the Camille Paglia reference was awesome (it's funny because it's true)...Simpsons even had some moments tonight (although the Rapture ep was a little too close to the Angel one--and there was a reset button!)
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Am I the only person left confused by the shows transformation into The Western Wing? Less shit about Yankton and claims and more cocksuckers and killing please.
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We know Herc. You don't like 'Desperate Housewives'. We get it. All of America is shallow and your opinions embody natural superiority, pop culture critic that you are. The reason that Housewives is a hit is because it's funny. The show is really fuckin' funny. I admit it! Guilty as charged. I like Desperate Housewives. I like its story and I like its characters. It's a satire. 'Arrested Development' is a good show but there's no emotional involvement with any of the characters except Jason Bateman. They're all a bunch of cartoon characters. Housewives is a success because it steps back from its cynicism just enough to let its characters be human. As for Deadwood you don't need to worry about its competition from Housewives. Deadwood is a hit. It's already been picked up for a third season. And there's a good reason it's a hit. It's the best damn thing HBO has produced since Tony Soprano first stepped into the office of Dr. Jennifer Melfi. The world of television hasn't seen a character as complicated and intriguing as Al Swearengen in a long time. The only show whose lead compares is Hugh Laurie on 'House'. And guess what? Most HBO subscribers own VCR's or Tivo. 'Deadwood' gets repeat airings every week. Deadwood is here to stay and so is Housewives.
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if I do say so myself. Any of you cocksuckers think otherwise and we might have to have words out back of the saloon if you get my fucking meaning. But seriously, it's a great show because of the great villian in Al. He's a bad guy but kind of a murky shade of bad. Bullock is a great good guy because he's a bit of a murky shade of good. Everyone has flaws, everyone has beleavable motivations. It makes for an interesting show. Sometimes the dialog gets a bit too formal and hard to follow, but otherwise it is the most well thought out and concieved show I have see in a good long time. Peace cocksuckers.
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Deadwood season 1 was GREAT. Season 2 has been gutted and fed to Mr. Wu's pigs. It's still THE best writing on television, PERIOD, don't get me wrong, but in season one the plot and story arcs moved forward at a good clip, and it also lived up to the historical reputation of the actual Deadwood where there was one murder per day. This season seems to have forgotten that fact, additionally this season seems to have also forgotten the well known historical accounts of The Gem Saloon making up to five grand per night. If you pay attention to the patronage at the Gem on Deadwood, they rarely ever have more than one customer nursing a drink over on the opposite end of the casino floor from where Dan sits and waits his next order from Al. And WTF is up with the end of season one having all of the troops coming into town? Season two has completely abandoned that thread. Also, Al seems to have forgotten about the indian's head in the box that he couldn't quit talking to mid season. Deadwood season one was GREAT, season two, somewhat of a let down. If they are looking for a fourth season HBO had better look into fixing glaring problems like the ones I've mentioned here or people will start to drife away from their weekly dose of corruption and villany and might seek out more estrogin-centric entertainment. Oh yeah, Deadwood needs to cool it eitht he in jokes about cocksucker and all of the pathetic fart jokes. I mean c'mon.
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May 09, 2005 3:32:50 AM CDT
Deadwood Season 2 FEEBLE, yet still worthy. REDUX (JethroBodi
by jethrobodine
Deadwood season 1 was GREAT. Season 2 has been gutted and fed to Mr. Wu's pigs. It's still THE best writing on television, PERIOD, don't get me wrong, but in season one the plot and story arcs moved forward at a good clip, and it also lived up to the historical reputation of the actual Deadwood where there was one murder per day. This season seems to have forgotten that fact, additionally this season seems to have also forgotten the well known historical accounts of The Gem Saloon making up to five grand per night. If you pay attention to the patronage at the Gem on Deadwood, they rarely ever have more than one customer nursing a drink over on the opposite end of the casino floor from where Dan sits and waits his next order from Al. And WTF is up with the end of season one having all of the troops coming into town? Season two has completely abandoned that thread. Also, Al seems to have forgotten about the Indian's head in the box that he couldn't quit talking to mid season. Deadwood season one was GREAT, season two, somewhat of a let down. If they are looking for a fourth season HBO had better look into fixing glaring problems like the ones I've mentioned here or people will start to drift away from their weekly dose of corruption and villainy and might seek out more estrogen-centric entertainment. Oh yeah, Deadwood needs to cool it with all the in jokes about cocksucker and all of the pathetic fart jokes. I mean c'mon. Seriously!
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hey herc - are you going do a seperate talkback to draw attention to the fact that HBO aren't renewing Carnivale?
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when I read the review before watching the first episode I though "a western, they'll probably have duels and stuff". Of course, by the end of the episode I had forgoten any preconceived notions I could have about the show, and then Bullock and Wild Bill cap that cocksucker who wanted to leave the camp (what do you call a 'duel' when more than 2 people participate?). That was cool.. I really like the politcs and dialogs and stuff, but that was one of the coolest western duels I'd ever seen.
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Sure, Desperate Housewives is usually just an excuse to make Eva Longoria push heavy things. But it has its moments, and in any case Herc's cursing about that show is getting annoying. Comparing it to Arrested Development, however, is like comparing Rick Fox to Tim Duncan. No emotional attachment? Who are you, Dr. Phil? I'd care enough about Will Arnett to become his sexual slave, and that's more than enough.
Deadwood's still fabulous, its just making the transition from character establishment to plot development. I just pray that they give us a reason to give a crap about Hurst. -
May 09, 2005 8:28:56 AM CDT
1 thing I give "Family Guy" credit for is for making me watch th
by mr. profit
I can bet the reason why Herc hates it is because it's on Sunday at 9, HBO's prime spot. And the relationship between Terri and her Daughter is Gillmore-esque. But Gillmore doesnt get the ratings DH gets. DH is a well crafted show that knows exactly what it's audience wants. And it doesn't leave viewers hanging. Even the episodes that dont advance the storylines are entertaining. And the Simpsons is on a little roll. So far for two weeks I was entertained. FG was funny, but it cant be extremely funny every week. But this week was good. I have a Tivo so I never miss any show. And this morning I will watch Grey's Anatomy. Another show that seems to get no love here but it well written with good characters. And my TV top 3 this season, 1-Veronica Mars,2-Desperate Housewives, 3-Lost,. Lost used to be in 1st place, but Veronica Mars is GASP! More engaging and I care more about the characters on that show. I came to it late around episode 8 or 9, but I'm hooked.
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How scary was that!
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AL has exibited too many tells that he actually is a decient person underneath the ruthless Machiavellian bar owner facade.
Much of Als power in camp is due to fronting as the bad guy.
I see AL as more of a foil for Bullock. -
is the best character on tv. hands down. for all the bad stuff he plots and schemes hes also good. taking care of rev smith, the gimp, etc
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Where is the news that Carnivale has been cancelled? On the HBO talkbacks, people are talking about it as if it has been cancelled but I didn't see a story. Anyone know where the news is posted?
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Agreed. Swearengen is NOT a villain...just self-interested. They've taken some dramatic liberties with the real-life Swearengen, but McShane is the best actor on TV right now. I hope that in the last Deadwood episode, they flash-forward to the future and show Swearengen's ultimate fate.
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After years of reading this site and never posting, I had to register just to post that. Any tv critic who calls fucking "Angel" the best written hour-long has his head up his ass. I saw every episode of "Deadwood" last season but lost interest 2 episodes in this season. And "Desperate Housewives" is funny and original. The cast is hot, the plots move along instead of being dragged out over weeks, and if Herc doesn't like it he should just get over it instead of making himself look like an ass by bashing it while he nurses at the teat of Joss Whedon.
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The real Al dies around 1900 - hit by a train while crossing a train yard. Oh, yeah...penniless too.
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May 09, 2005 1:48:04 PM CDT
At least desperate housewives has a coherant plot, people speak
by cookylamoo
Deadwood is just foul and dirty for the sake of being dirty and foul. Guess what sort of people enjoy it.
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"Deadwood is just foul and dirty for the sake of being dirty and foul. Guess what sort of people enjoy it."----> Intelligent ones who like television with great characters, interesting stories, and engaging dialogue. The reason for the excessive foul language is because those cocksuckers talked like that in one of the most dangerous towns in North America. They mix their Victorian eloquence with foul street slang, which can make it difficult to but not impossible to understand them. You just have to think and listen carefully. Be attentive and not a braindead fucking cockersucker like Cookylamoo. ;-)
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May 09, 2005 2:24:51 PM CDT
One of the best things about Deadwood is that it improves with e
by chickychow
Of course Desperate Housewives is more popular, theres nothing subtle about it. Every joke wackily kicks you in the nuts. (while making a snooty face, no less) Deadwood you have to watch more than once. The first time you get the gist of what they're saying, if not always fully comprehending it, the 2nd time you can listen closer, catch things you may have missed, marvel at the intricacies of the monologues. Deadwood and The Wire are televisions two best shows.
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Strange combo you say? Think about how cool and complex a galaxy Milch could create. Think of rebels and bounty hunters, conflicted heroes and badass villains. Hell, think of how interesting he can even make annexing a town into a state, compared with Lucas's horrid trade aggreements and senate bullshit (although I'll agree that its not the most compelling story thread, its gettin a little old). NO Kevin Smith, no Joss Whedon, THIS is the man for the job! "That cocksucker's no good to me dead."
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May 09, 2005 2:49:36 PM CDT
"Be attentive and not a braindead fucking cockersucker like Coo
by cookylamoo
I rest my case regarding Deadwood Fans.
Really, I don't doubt that the people in Deadwood were foul mouthed. What I doubt is that people raised in the woods spoke to each other in this flowery pseudo Victorian gobbledegook. Also, I can watch Six Feet Under once and understand it perfectly. Why should I watch this Horse opera three times just to find out what's going on? For me Desterpate Housewives Rules Sunday. Deadwood is a show that comes on Monday Night. By the way, HBO, thanks for stringing us along two years on Carnivale and then leaving us hanging. Can't you at least do a two part special to wrap things up? -
I watch Deadwood the 2nd time with the captions on. It makes the Victorian Language and the Iambic Pentameter easier to understand. Ive caught a lot doing it.
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You, sir or madam are MUDDLEHEADED.
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May 09, 2005 3:26:59 PM CDT
Poor, Cooky. Too filled with self-loathing to have a good time
by phangs01
Really, if language is keeping you from enjoying this brilliant work of art, perhaps you should stick to things more your speed. Like American Idol . . . or Teletubbies. This is grown up time. Go play with your sanitized, choke proof, child safe toys.
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Give me a fukin break?!?!
Deadwood rules. Deal with it.
BTW, we'll see Wyatt Earp next season -
The only show I used to watch on Sunday evenings was Carnivale. Now I just watch whatever Netflix DVDs I happen to have on hand. Fuck HBO.
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The best parts thus far this season were watching that cocksucker Wolcott get his ass whupped by Charlie Utter and then get a bottle smashed over his head by Miss Joanie Stubbs.I can't stand that prick...I read somewhere that Wyatt Earp showed up in Deadwood in 1877 lookin to be sheriff and the real Bullock told him his services were not needed,wonder if Milch will pursue that storyline...
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Al Swearengen = Andy Sipowicz = David Milch's alter ego.
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May 09, 2005 4:35:55 PM CDT
Milch obviously likes to make up his own versions of English.
by cookylamoo
Actually, he had everyone on NYPD Blue speaking Victorian, too. I mean who ever said "I'm sorry for your loss" before Blue.
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Isn't there a whole range of literature the lies between the teletubbies, American Idol and DEADWOOD that I might partake of if I choose. Mark Twain for example who somehow managed to write Huckleberry Finn, the Great American Novel without resorting to one use of Cocksucker or Fucking even though I'm sure that some uncouth denizens of Hannibal Missouri would sometimes give it utterance?
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May 09, 2005 5:34:57 PM CDT
I dont think anyone here was saying that DH was better than Dead
by mr. profit
If you are going to cover TV shows, you should be fair and cover more shows instead of the 5 that are focused on. The only show I like that Herc likes is Veronica Mars.
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If memory serves Teddy was a marshall?/Sheriff? in the area during Deadwood's heydey. In fact, he became fast friends with Bullock (who later rode with him in the famous charge up San Juan Hill). I would love to see a young Roosevelt make an appearance on Deadwood although I don't think the timeframe is quite right.
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That shit does not deserve to be mentioned in the same talkback as the fan-fucking-tastic Deadwood. Ignorant limber-dicked cocksuckers watch that tripe. Terry Hatcher is a goddamned skeleton with limited range and the others are not much better.
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Maybe I shouldn't have had that second cup.
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You're full of shit if you honestly believe a piece of fluff crap like DH is even in the same league as Angel and Deadwood. Best shows on tv right now Deadwood and lost. Enough said.
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I've seen every episode of Angel and I liked it too. And I never said one was better than the other. But you guys that rip on DH talk like you've never watched an episode of it, especially Herc who probably hasn't seen an episode since the premier (yes, the reason the narrator killed herself was explained months ago) yet continues to bash anyone in the world who enjoys this show while about every show he raves about gets cancelled. I mean, Wonderfalls was good for about 3 weeks. Deadwood is fine, and I stuck with it for a long time, but it ain't all that. DH ain't all that either, but it's also not worth all the bashing it gets either and just because so many people love and couldn't care less about some cheesy vampire shit doesn't mean the world is full of idiots and Hercules is an asshole for consistently saying so.
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May 09, 2005 6:57:57 PM CDT
Terry Hatcher is a goddamned skeleton with limited range and the
by cookylamoo
As opposed to the beautiful babes on Deadwood? Actually, I thought Bree looked exceptionally lovely this week. Who wouldn't weant to have wild untrammeled sex with a consrvative Republican like this? You guys can pant over Calamity Jane if you want but I'll take DH anyday because you don't have to pick the scabs to get lubricated.
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Hell yeah, watching it with the captions on is great, especially during a Wolcott or Swearengen speech. It's tough for the captions to even keep up.
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Sorry to interrupt the argument and actually discuss Deadwood, but does Anybody else maybe think this guy likes taking it as much as he dishes it out..? I'm pretty sure He went to Joanie's room knowing he'd get fucked up somehow, be it by Joanie, or eventually Charlie. I think when he eventually gets his (and I hope its not this season), he'll be instigating and welcoming it.
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Cutest, you are right about TR and Bullock, but it was after deadwood, in the late 1880s I think. TR was born in the late 1850s, I remember a story about him as a young boy watching the parades at the end of the Civil War, so he was in his teens during the period that Deadwood occurs.
I've never seen Desperate Housewives, so I have no idea if it is any good or not, but it seems to me that one of the things that limits a lot of American TV shows these days is the need to limit shows to more or less self contained episodes. People like for things to be simple and easy. They like for all the loose ends to be tied up at the end of an hour. Even shows that carry threads over episode to episode usually only have one or maybe two threads that continue. Shows that have more complicated storylines, shows that dont always resolve things or require viewers to remember previous episodes tend not to do well. There are exceptions like the Sopranos, but even there, people bitch because the Russian in the Pine Barrens plot line was never sewed up neatly. Deadwood is a great show with lots of interesting characters. I really liked season 1 of Carnivale, I haven't seen season 2 yet, and its a shame they won't get a season 3. I liked the handful of episode I've seen of Arrested Development, and I loved Twin Peaks. All of these shows really tried to do something more than the standard TV show, they tried to do things on a more long term scale or they tried to write shows that relied on the viewer paying attention and remembering the world that the show set up. For the most part, they weren't rewarded for their efforts. Its always easier to feed people the same easy cookie cutter TV. It's the HL Mencken quote all over again- "Nobody ever went broke by underestimating the taste and intelligence of the American People" (or words to that affect.) -
Late 1880's, eh? Oh, well...so much for seeing TR - unless of course Deadwood continues another 10 seasons. Doubtful. ***COOKYLAMOO - Hell yes I'd roger Calamity Jane. She was quite the accomplished prostitute. I'd just have to get past the farting and the occasional "Hurry up, cocksucker!" remark.
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You are dead on with your Wolcott observation. I have been thinking since the Utter ass-whuppin' that this guy loves to be beat. As much as I despise the guy I would hate to see him check out this season (or next).
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Even though it was great seeing this sonofabitch get the shit kicked out of him, thinking he gets off on it negates it a bit. You can't win with this cocksucker! Things will come to a boil between him and Tolliver, and it'll be interesting to see how the mysterious Mr. Lee gets involved (teaser for next weeks ep hints that finally we'll get to see this guy in action).
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The beating he took was either voluntary or poorly choreographed. Charlie Utter (sp?)kicking the crap out of him was not believable. And with Wolcott's huge Bowie in his belt? WTF, let's get a little high end fight choreography for Wolcott's big fight (win or lose).
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I thought Wolly weilded a straight razor. Also did anyone notice, was Moses' brother the same actor that playes Sol?
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cerebrus is right. We should see Wyatt Earp next season. Deadwood starts out in 1877. Wyatt Earp was in town for a year starting in 1878. They have to do something with him. I wonder what. A villain perhaps? We always see him as a hero, it would be kind of cool to see a revisionist history done on him. The show is fiction, after all. Or maybe we'll see how Wyatt got his balls. The fact that he left town suggests that maybe the chaos of Deadwood was too much for him. The whole idea could actually be something strong enough for HBO to make it's first spinoff series. Hell, when 'The Sopranos' ends there are plenty of threads that would make a good show unto themselves. Sequels/spinoffs are an element of popular entertainment that usually suck. But still, the best sequels are the biggest treat as advocates of 'The Empire Strikes Back', 'Spiderman 2', and 'Godfather II' will attest to.
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Wolcott: "If we fight, I assure you it won't be a casual matter"
Utter: "Oh, I see... You got your big fucking knife there..."
In the same episode, as far as Wolcott's self-destructive bent...while shaving he puts his straight razor perpendicular to his neck apparently contemplating suicide.
He is a great character on an amazing show. -
Did anyone else flash on the N_ General's prior role in Robocop when he took a piss in yesterday's episode?
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N_ General Franlin Ajaye
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N_ General: Franklin Ajaye
"Joe Cox" from Robocop, Jesse D. Goins
No edit on this board, gots to be careful -
I'm sure Terri has had her puppies redone by now.
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I'm sure he was cast because he was an NYPD Blue writer, as well as In Living Color... But I'll always remember him as the cop at the end of The 'burbs... Am I proud of that? Would YOU be? Here's more useless trivia: His pal who runs the livery is the coroner who gets possesed by Jason's spirit at the beginning of Jason Goes to Hell. (please, keep the snickering to a minimum)
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