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Review

STAR WARS EPISODE III: REVENGE OF THE SITH review

I have watched my last new STAR WARS film.

Really don’t know what to say. I’ve wanted to see Obi-Wan fight Vader on that Lava Planet since that issue of Starlog in 1978. My 6 year old reading comprehension grasping for every word of every article I could get my grubby little hands on. For me, the origin of Vader has been the Holy Grail of my geek soul. That story most coveted, but yet untold. I’m 33 years old now. 27 years lay between me and that boy that dreamt of that fight – but right now, he’s on my shoulders and we’re slapping high-fives.

The imagery in REVENGE OF THE SITH -- The turning of Anakin, the annihilation of the Jedi, the expulsion of Yoda, Obi-Wan vs Anakin, Palpatine revealed, the birth of the twins, Alderran, the adoption of Luke, what became of the droids… These are all near religious iconography in the minds of children raised in the ways of the Force. I’ve spent a quarter of a century discussing these things, speculating on what it’d look like, how it’d play out… I’ve seen it in countless dreams, but never with my eyes open. Never George’s dream of what it was. Till now.

As I sat at the Regal Metropolitan Theater in South Austin watching the film – I couldn’t help but get caught up in it. Dad was there with me, we’ve spent countless years talking STAR WARS – through STAR WARS – I learnt of the source material George was smashing and grabbing from – B serials, Pulp sci-fantasy adventure romances, Asian cinema – all of it. Before STAR WARS – I was well on my way – after STAR WARS the road was poured. I would be a geek for the rest of my life.

That would mean, I’d be primed to openly weep as Yoda crawled through that damn crawlspace to escape, during the whole of Obi-Wan and Anakin’s fight and the death of Luke & Leia’s mother. It is a very powerful thing to see the dreams one has spent a quarter of a century pondering. It might be cheese ball of me, but dammit – this is exactly what I wanted out of this last STAR WARS film… closure.

I’m having a really hard time writing about this one. It’s just so damn big. So full of literally everything that I wanted to see in all the prequels – but crammed all into this one. This really is the big Michael Corleone episode of STAR WARS… It’s where all the traps are sprung, all the cards are laid on the table, where everybody dies, all is lost and evil rules the galaxy.

That’s what makes the film so damn hard to talk about, at least off a first viewing. Let me see if I can explain this.

We all know how dark this film is intended to be. We all know how incredibly dire things will turn out in this film. However, the first 40 minutes are so light… as to be completely disconcerting. There’s just a feeling that THEY shouldn’t be having fun. Don’t they know this is the last smiles they’ll share? That when Obi Wan goes on that last mission and Anakin wishes him well… that that’s the last time they would be friends… Don’t they know that? WE DO, why can’t they see what’s coming? WAKE UP!

The film makes you powerless to change things. It’s like sitting still for a fucking tragedy right from the get go, but unlike TITANIC, you don’t have it all spelt out yet. Unless you’ve read all the spoilers – and I don’t really know what you spoiler-lovers will think. Just because for me… I knew, basically, what was going to happen. The broad strokes. I’ve gone out of my way to ignore as many spoilers as possible – which is a near impossible thing to do when you’re being emailed by everyone on Earth 300 images a day, 40 reviews a day now and were sent all the books, comics, score, everything from Publicity firms… shit… I bought that Talking Yoda toy – and next thing I know the little Green Bastard is trying to tell me the story of REVENGE OF THE SITH. It’s so hard to be pure on this – there’s just so much information out there. Everywhere.

The most shocking or surprising emotion I felt during this film experience is that… I don’t want Anakin to become Darth Vader. I just… Despite 27 years to the contrary, as I sat in that theater watching the last act of a good Jedi that turned evil… I just found myself wanting to scream at him to stop. I wanted desperately to send him on that mission with Obi Wan. I wanted Mace Windu to put his hand on Anakin’s shoulder and say, “Come on Kid, Let’s finish this!” and march off as brother Jedi to kill the fucking Emperor. I wanted Anakin to let go of his hate, fear, ambition, jealousy and self-centered egotism and just be the knight in shining armor… FOR THE GOOD GUYS!

You can tell… Anakin so wants to do what is right. He even does the right things, it’s just everyone around him doesn’t treat him as an equal… save for Palpatine. That when push comes to shove, the only fucking rat bastard in the galaxy that is going to call him son, tell him ‘fairy tales’ and really listen to his problems enough to find out what is REALLY troubling him is the bad guy!

Why?

Because the whole damn galaxy is at war, because to everyone else, Anakin’s existential crisis doesn’t amount to a hill of beans, they’ve got bigger fish to fry. They’ve got to Protect Wookies and the mushroom people and Hellraiser’s home planet and kill lots of robots and General Grievous and police the fucking universe… and… and… well, their damn domestic policy sucks!

The Bad Guy has his priorities right. He’s controlling the robots, the clones and to a large extent the Jedi… yet still manages to multi-task enough to listen to Anakin and help him deal with his premonitions of personal tragedy. He'll take the time, to ignore an amazing science fiction zero G Esther Williams number, to tell young Skywalker a SITH LEGEND. A story, an anecdote. And he tells it, like a father would to a son. And the story is directly related to the problem Anakin is facing, it gives him hope, direction and the first glimmer of a happy ending to his concern. He doesn’t tell Anakin bullshit like… learn to not give a shit, detachment is the key to inner peace… What sort of bullshit is that? Ignore your problems, betray those you love, watch everyone you care about die – and just be happy cuz they’re food for the force, which you manipulate… and everyone’s death will just make you more powerful. WHAT SORT OF FUCKING JEDI WISDOM IS THAT SHIT YODA??? THAT'S NOT REALLY HELPFUL YOU NEGATIVE GREEN TURD!

My god. The Jedi really are a bunch of goody two shoe clueless fucks. They’re so concerned with fixing the galaxy’s problems that they don’t have time for their own… and due to their unrealistic and inhumane rules about not loving or caring about anything other than the almighty “force” they created an air of fear for Skywalker. How could he level with them? How could he share with them? By the time Obi Wan finds out Anakin and Padme have kids on the way… it’s too late. That ship has sailed. Everyone is so busy being good little soldiers, that they just are not communicating.

Obi Wan never takes Anakin out for drinks and just levels with him. Sits him down and explains fascist totalitarianism. He doesn’t explain why sacrificing the most marginal freedoms to create a false sense of security enables those taking on those additional powers to create a greater evil than that which they fear. Hell, nobody really explains to Anakin why Democracy is better than Absolute Rule. Instead it is all this, “Search your feelings” bullshit. Turn to your ancient religion. This is why ultimately Luke Skywalker kicks ass. Because he doesn’t have all this dogmatic bullshit. Because he’s got a buddy like Han Solo that’d be willing to bust ass across the galaxy to save his ass. Somebody that has his back. FRIENDS! Because when the Sith hits the fan, it’s the love of your friends that’ll help you push through and kick ass. Because Luke believes in twin sunsets, the good guys and saving his dad.

What does Anakin have? Who cares about Anakin? Well Obi Wan, but he doesn’t know how to show it. Yoda? He’s too busy being disturbed about the cosmic meaning of shit to even form a no bullshit non fortune cookie sentence. Mace Windu? He’s got his head so far up his ass it ain’t funny. Padme? She’s more concerned with her hair, her image, everybody’s standing and well being. And then Anakin himself? He’s told he’s the chosen one, the key that will make the galaxy unified. Yet, the only one empowering him to do that is the fucking Emperor.

I love how together Palpatine is. He’s just one of the greatest bad guys in the history of bad guys. He absolutely must be Karl Rove’s hero. Look at this. Palpatine has engineered so many things. The creation of the Droid armies, the creation of the Clone armies, his various Sith apprentices, Fall guys for Fall guys… all with the direct purpose of spreading his enemy so thin, that no matter their powers, when he calls ORDER 66… they’ll never see it coming. It’s like inviting your friends over for an all night session of game play and spreading cyanide on the fucking pizza. They’re all gonna eat it, cuz… dude… it’s what you do when you play games. The Jedi are fighting their war, doing Jedi shit. Kill the droids, tons of them. This shit is fun for them. They eat it up. This is their Frosted Flakes with Bananas. They finally got their Holy Crusade, woo hoo, a sense of purpose. They never think twice about all them fucking Boba Fetts watching their backs.

It’s so beautifully laid out. It’s fucking immaculate. This is literally how you rule the universe. It is to be admired. And learnt from. Cuz as Padme says, “This is how Democracy ends, with Thunderous Applause.” Exactly. Distractions, a clear and concise innocent front and cutthroat evil behind the scenes.

REVENGE OF THE SITH is a masterpiece. The final piece of the puzzle Lucas first presented me at age 6. 27 years later, the Jigsaw is complete and damn if it isn't just damn near the most tragically cool thing I’ve ever seen put to film. We won’t see another like this. This is it.

We’ll see enormous sci-fantasy told, with more focus and even grander visions in our lifetime… but we’ll never care as much about a story like this one. For our generation, Star Wars is our mythology. The big story we lived to see told the first time. For those of you that were kids in lines in 1977 through to the coming weeks… I have to say, it has been an absolute fucking honor to do this with y’all.

We all know where we each were at the opening of all these films. In two weeks… this is your last story. I’ll never see a new Star Wars movie with my father again. I’ll see many more movies – but this is the last Star Wars, I’ll ever see for the first time with my dad. I’ve seen all 6 with him. All on either the first day – or before. It’s the mythology he’s grown old with and helped me grow up with. This one counts, this one is beautiful. This is the last one.

I can’t possibly express how profoundly odd that is to type. How weird it makes me feel. I went out after the film – I went to find a toy to sit on my desk to look at while I typed this. I went through aisle after aisle of Star Wars stuff, and I couldn’t pick something out. I think the one I most thought was cool – was this Lego play set of Anakin and Obi Wan on Mustafa. You pressed down the Lego character’s head and the light sabers lit up. Gosh that’s cool. I’ll probably buy it for my nephew… Instead I came home, played the score to REVENGE OF THE SITH and wrote this.

Remember – this isn’t a Star Wars movie to cheer for, to erupt into applause and call cool. If you really love STAR WARS – this one is heart ache. Not only is it the end of a nearly 30 year journey for us… It really is the story of how things got so bad, that the good guys had to be a rebellion, where the Jedi had to hide and how evil ruled the galaxy. Wow, I’ve seen my last new Star Wars film. Fuck.

Readers Talkback
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  • May 6, 2005, 6:46 a.m. CST

    Give us a REAL review

    by johnnyfartpants

    Fanboy.

  • May 6, 2005, 6:46 a.m. CST

    First

    by Belial

    At last

  • May 6, 2005, 6:51 a.m. CST

    as if he would hate it

    by pogo on my own

  • May 6, 2005, 6:52 a.m. CST

    So its good?

    by Jon E Cin

    Bad? Good? Great? You seem really depressed man...really bummin me out.

  • May 6, 2005, 6:54 a.m. CST

    "I went through the aisle after aisle of Star Wars stuff..."

    by johnnyfartpants

    Kinda like, Been there, saw the film, bought the merchandise. They've got Vader on bog roll you know.

  • May 6, 2005, 6:56 a.m. CST

    Sigh...

    by theoneofblood

    It would have been nice if Harry had said something we actually weren't expecting. You liked the movie you've been aping for the last year? What a surprise! Still, it's his site, and I'm just a geeky film student, so who the fuck am I to complain?

  • May 6, 2005, 7 a.m. CST

    This is the end, beautiful friend

    by HarryBlackPotter

    Not a dry eye in the house. That review was well worth the 27 year wait! Sob.

  • May 6, 2005, 7:02 a.m. CST

    "Plant!"

    by SalvatoreGravano

    Ah, I just thought I'd quote the old joke first. Also, cast Hulk Hogan as Vader, blablabla.

  • May 6, 2005, 7:04 a.m. CST

    Just give it a mark out of five or ten or whatever...

    by workshed

    ...I'm trying my damned hardest to stay spoiler free by skipping to the last paragraph but what do I find..? Slushy drivel. Be a bit more hard-nosed Harry because Lucas has some serious crawling to do to make up for I and II.

  • May 6, 2005, 7:04 a.m. CST

    But the series will continue through a TV show...and countless b

    by aceattorney

  • May 6, 2005, 7:05 a.m. CST

    "REVENGE OF THE SITH is a masterpiece"

    by krullboy

    Telephone call for MinasTirithII on Line 1. Telephone call for CocoLopez Line 2. Telephone call for SirBiatchReturns. . . Hello?. . . Anyone? . . .

  • May 6, 2005, 7:08 a.m. CST

    can't wait!

    by phortonfour

    i mean, was it ever likely that harry would slate this film? i can't wait the extra 13 days to see this! I can't wait to feel the excitment of seeing that opening scroll come up, to see the Jedis go to the shits, and a whole load of other things. Oh, and I can't wait until I can have all six DVDs in front of me, sit back, and enjoy...bring it on!

  • May 6, 2005, 7:09 a.m. CST

    So, judging by the slew of AICN Star Wars reviews/comments sudde

    by JackBurton

    Sure as hell looks like it anyhow. As for the rest of us lesser mortals, two more weeks I guess...

  • May 6, 2005, 7:12 a.m. CST

    How many times did Moriarty watch the soundtrack DVD...

    by johnnyfartpants

    ...and is he using it as a coaster yet?

  • May 6, 2005, 7:14 a.m. CST

    They're remaking "All of Me" with Wanda Sykes. someone fucking

    by HypeEndsHere

  • May 6, 2005, 7:15 a.m. CST

    Krullboy, it's for you...

    by HypeEndsHere

    It's some guy saying HARRY LOVES EVERYTHING.

  • May 6, 2005, 7:20 a.m. CST

    You liked Jar Jar

    by HairyNutsack

    Your opinion is completely irrelevant.

  • May 6, 2005, 7:26 a.m. CST

    does it explain why ..

    by Mr Cairo

    they didnt change lukes name when they hid him from vader , i seem to recall that the jedi were afraid that Vader would find the children so they hid them .. leia was adopted changed her name and sent her off to live with Organa's on a planet far away in all honesty nicley hidden , luke on the other hand remained a skywalker lived on tatooine at his uncles house and still vader couldnt find him .... so much for the power of the sith

  • May 6, 2005, 7:26 a.m. CST

    I am on the other line with Rottentomatoes.com. . .

    by krullboy

    Sorry about that. Anyway, I know he likes everything (ie Mummy Returns and Van Helsing), but I was almost relieved that he said he liked it. A part of me really thought Mr. Knowles was going to pull some sort of out of left fiels slam of the movie, providing unlimited ammo to some of the monotone brain morons on these TBs. I have no problem with the people that slam the films with well thought out arguments; heck, that's what makes AICN what it is. Am I a little over eager to crown ROTS as a huge achievement? Yes. Should I see it before I make my final judgement? Yes. That beind said, it is pretty amazing how inconspicuous some of the "SW sucks, LOTR Rulz" have been since the reviews have started leaking in, such as some of the ones from Variety, USA Today, and the Hollywood Reporter. Thanks for bringing back to rational thought HypeEndsHere. Now if only someone could do the same for MinasTirthII, "it will be a day long remembered."

  • May 6, 2005, 7:41 a.m. CST

    "He absolutely must be Karl Rove

    by classyfredblassy

    Can you you leave your lame ass political commentary out of it, and just review the friggin' movie? You self-righteous fat tub of shit. I bet you sweat grease.

  • May 6, 2005, 7:47 a.m. CST

    "This is why ultimately Luke Skywalker kicks ass. Because he doe

    by Voice O. Reason

    That's an interesting point for a movie to try and make. Naturally, 80% of the audience will probably miss it.

  • May 6, 2005, 7:50 a.m. CST

    classyfredblassy

    by Voice O. Reason

    Left or right, you gotta admit Karl Rove's the king of political manipulation.

  • May 6, 2005, 7:56 a.m. CST

    Luke and attachments

    by krullboy

    If ESB taught us anything, it was that the "have no attachments" thing has a basis, in that having strong ties can drive you to do irrational things, leading to your own destruction. Luke "kicked ass" because he chose not to "kick ass" on the Emperor, two vary different concepts.

  • May 6, 2005, 7:57 a.m. CST

    vary vs very

    by krullboy

    Sorry, too much sugar.

  • May 6, 2005, 8 a.m. CST

    wonderful

    by fxmulder35

    Great comments, Harry. All of us REAL fans, down deep, hope you are right. Not many will agree in the light of day that there were many things to like about PHANTOM and CLONES. Also some things to dislike. But I, for one, and hoping that REVENGE is a grand slam to end the World Series in the best possible way!

  • May 6, 2005, 8:02 a.m. CST

    Basically...

    by embrypotzebra721

    this is Lucas' metaphorical arguement that priests shouldn't have to wear robes and not get to bang chicks. ie, Luke not being a "dogmatic" tight ass. (I don't know what I'm saying (really I don't (I'm serious)) and I couldn't care less if I did (really (I'm serious))))......

  • May 6, 2005, 8:03 a.m. CST

    Thanks, Harry

    by DocPazuzu

    Great review. As someone who watched Star Wars for the first time as a ten-year-old during that blistering 1977 Austin summer, I can truly relate to what you're feeling. Taking that into account, and how you've described the movie, I'm more anxious to see it than ever. I was worried that we'd either feel detached from the story or -- even worse -- WANT to see Anakin finally fall. If the movie made a 30-something geek like you hope against futile hope that somehow, magically, things would turn out for the better for our decades-long intergalactic companions, then that's the best endorsement I could hope for. Thanks again. Suck it, haters.

  • May 6, 2005, 8:07 a.m. CST

    glad you liked it man

    by banthafodderUK

    but even if you said that you thought it was shit, Id still have had this feeling that im going to love this fucking film.

  • Cocolopez=spitter. . . . . SirBiatchReturns=swallower. . . MinasTirithII=plays with it on his tongue, blows cum bubbles, then swallows

  • May 6, 2005, 8:11 a.m. CST

    Voice O. Reason

    by classyfredblassy

    If you are going to weave lame ass political commentaries in to your movie reviews, why not say something like this: "When Anakin goes to to the dark side, he starts cutting off heads like a muslim terrorists on crack!" Get it? See, they have actually cut the heads off of people on tape, and then were happy about it. See, now that is relevant!

  • Fatty couldn't talk about Star Wars without going political. Typical bitter lazy lib.

  • May 6, 2005, 8:16 a.m. CST

    "blows cum bubbles, "

    by banthafodderUK

    priceless

  • May 6, 2005, 8:18 a.m. CST

    4 out of 6 ain't bad (sorry, but I dug AOTC)...

    by WONKABAR

    So we have six films, the first and the last...kinda weak. And four in a row- good to great SW films-, and two of them(ESB, and looking like ROTS) GREAT FILMS PERIOD...not bad...and yeah, I'll take AOTC over Jedi any day.

  • May 6, 2005, 8:19 a.m. CST

    Love you Harry, but I guarantee you Lucasfilm will go the distan

    by alucardvsdracula

    We'll probably be crusty near-death foggies by then, but it'll happen. Episodes 7-9 lets have you! It'll be worth it, just to read your fanboycentric SW prose. No,the force isn't going to die on anyone for a long time to come. Oh and lets not forget a certain TV show's on the way.

  • May 6, 2005, 8:19 a.m. CST

    monkeytennis?

    by banthafodderUK

    what about arm wrestling with chas and dave? or cooking in prison? "SMELL MY CHEESE YOU MOTHER!!!!" ; )

  • May 6, 2005, 8:22 a.m. CST

    ITS NOT THE END OF THE SERIES

    by banthafodderUK

    LUCAS WILL MAKE THE SEQUEL TRILOGY (EPS 7-9) - I'D BET MY ONE-EYED-MILKMAN ON IT.

  • May 6, 2005, 8:22 a.m. CST

    BanthafodderUK, yesterdays elections, and pearl jewelry

    by krullboy

    Glad that image is now ingrained in your head. In fact, that should be on the cover of the next CocoLopez CD, "A day in the life of Facial Cum shot". Kind or ironic Harry's politics-laced review and the end of the recent UK elections. On the eve of V-E Day, it will be interesting to see what will happen over the next few years of Labor. Will it be the Republic of the Empire?

  • May 6, 2005, 8:24 a.m. CST

    Forthy fourth!!!!

    by Stewie_Griffin

    Sweet

  • May 6, 2005, 8:30 a.m. CST

    KRULLBOY- IM GUTTED - I VOTED CONSERVATIVE

    by banthafodderUK

    YESTERDAY - TONY BLAIRS HAND MOVEMENTS REALLY IRRITATE ME - AND HIS HIFE HAS A FACE LIKE A BAG OF SPANNERS

  • May 6, 2005, 8:31 a.m. CST

    SHIT - I MEANT WIFE!!

    by banthafodderUK

    (what the fuck is a hife?????)

  • May 6, 2005, 8:41 a.m. CST

    Tony Blair, Palpatine, and the EU

    by krullboy

    Well, since Labor lost a lot of votes, a "vote of no confidence" (to steal a line of Amidala/Palpatine in TPM) may happen before the end of Blair's term. Churchill once said that "Democracy is a terrible form a government, but it is better than any alternative". Much like ROTS displays, any form of government can be a tool for evil. People who say that the subtext message of evil government in ROTS is a commentary on Bush are way off, considering that Clinton was in office when the prequels were being formulated and the scripts hashed out. Lucas' take is not based on Bush, but on Hitler, Napoleon, and ancient Rome, in that a good form of government can be manipulated by greed. That being said, since I'm Yank, it is not my position to comment on the UK election one way or another, only that I hope who ever ends up calling the shots in the House of Commons in the future keeps their priorities straight, and remembers that not everyone in the world plays by the Western European rules of problem solving; they would rather fly a plane into Canary Wharf or blow up the bargaining table, just as soon as sit down to debate issues. The UK and Western Europe of the Cold War is no more, and its direction will have global ramifications. . . and where in the blue fuck is MinasTirithII?

  • May 6, 2005, 8:44 a.m. CST

    The End of AICN?

    by PhilConnors

    I - and I'm sure a lot of other people - discovered AICN because of our search for Episode I rumors... With the direction this site is going, the decreasing attention given to it by it's main contributors, and the end of the massive fantasy franchises that have fueled online traffic here, one can't help but wonder if this is the beginning of the end of AICN...

  • May 6, 2005, 8:47 a.m. CST

    PhilConnors

    by johnnyfartpants

    You're not trying to start a proper discussion in here are you?

  • May 6, 2005, 8:55 a.m. CST

    GLAD THERE IS A BIG SPOILER IN ROTS

    by stlfilmwire

    Just so you Star Wars fans know, I saw it a screening recently... and you will be glad to know there is more to the story than you may already know... unless you read the books, I guess. I was afraid there wouldn't be. Don't worry.

  • May 6, 2005, 8:56 a.m. CST

    hary loves it?? Uh oh, it may not be as good as it looks if harr

    by The Founder

  • May 6, 2005, 8:56 a.m. CST

    "well, they

    by SpyGuy

    "They're" is a contraction, short for "they are." "Their," meanwhile, is the word used to show possession or ownership.

  • May 6, 2005, 8:58 a.m. CST

    hey- i like aicn

    by banthafodderUK

    And im not arselicking before you say it. Im sure there'll be more than enough to keep this site full of cool shit (the next 42 xmen/spidey/supes/ff/batman sequels just for example - im looking forward to them anyway). I have a laugh on here - i reckon it'll be ok

  • May 6, 2005, 8:59 a.m. CST

    I didn't read the review because I'm avoiding spoilers.

    by rev_skarekroe

    But I wanted to post here anyway, just to be irritating.

  • May 6, 2005, 9:05 a.m. CST

    Thanks.

    by ThatYellowJedi

    Long time listener... Blah, Blah. Fuck 'em. And you know who I mean. Heartfelt review. Gives me hope. ...And it is good to see you can write a review with out sexual imagery that makes me feel dirty;)

  • May 6, 2005, 9:06 a.m. CST

    First

    by kingralphuk

    Fuck yeah - first one on the talkback. I rule !

  • May 6, 2005, 9:07 a.m. CST

    I am used to a lot of hyperbole on this site,

    by Barry Egan

    maybe we need to look up the definition of the word "materpiece."

  • May 6, 2005, 9:09 a.m. CST

    Yeah but does Jar Jar get sodomized with a lightsaber or not?

    by Mr.F.N.Sunshine

    Only then will the prequels be complete.

  • May 6, 2005, 9:09 a.m. CST

    "Michael...you ARE blind."

    by uss cygnus

    To paraphrase "Godfather II:" "Harry, you ARE blind." The entire prequel trilogy is already a failure because we don't care about Anakin. He is a whining, complaining, horribly written and poorly characterized little BRAT. I WANT HIM TO DIE. I will be screaming "FINISH HIM, OBI-WAN!!" when I watch this thing on HBO,(cause I'm not going to pay to see this crap at the theatre)at the end of the final duel where he whips Anakin's ass. There is no way, no way at all that you can believeably convince me that Anakin can become Vader. And it's been confirmed that Anakin's last words to Obi-Wan on the bank of the lava river are "I hate you!" That's the best they could come up with? "I hate you!"?!? Unforgivable. And finally, go ahead. You can take all the sly, backhanded shots at Bush and make all the har de har har galactic empire=homeland security allegories you want. Just make sure you thank God tonight that you live in a country that allows you to freely express dissent without it resulting in you being dragged into a shallow ditch and shot in the back of the head. And also hope that when you go to work tomorrow, some of the horribly oppressed "rebel scum" in this world doesn't decide to detonate a nuclear bomb, release nerve gas or fly a 737 into the side of another skyscraper. Things that are being stopped by this administration's so-called "suppression of individual freedoms" in this country. You lost the 2004 election. Overwhelmingly. Deal with it. Wake up and smell the Maple Nut Crunch.

  • May 6, 2005, 9:10 a.m. CST

    save for the Rove stuff, I'm right there with you Harry

    by Blacklist

    With as amazing as I've been hearing Sith is, it's weird how depressing it is to not even be able to grasp what the next generation-defining monolith will be. For now though, I'll just sit back and admire Sith. At least there's a TV series to look forward to.

  • May 6, 2005, 9:11 a.m. CST

    Rove=Palpy

    by Kentucky Colonel

    No doubt about it. Cheers to Tony Blair...but stop sucking Bush's dick, OK Tony? The new pope looks like the emporor, didja notice that? Truly an axis of evil.

  • May 6, 2005, 9:14 a.m. CST

    The new Pope looks exactly like Dan Akroyd in "Nothing But Troub

    by HypeEndsHere

  • May 6, 2005, 9:14 a.m. CST

    Lucas raped my childhood at a ROTS preview screening at his Neve

    by Angel Eyes

  • May 6, 2005, 9:23 a.m. CST

    There will be another...

    by Darth Busey

    I don't think Lucas can ignore the fan base, and there will be another movie set in the Star Wars universe eventually. George can simply have an exec producer credit, and the plot should have absolutely nothing to do with the first 6 movies. The Skywalker story has been told.

  • May 6, 2005, 9:29 a.m. CST

    I thought it was rather eloquent for Knowles...

    by TV CASUALTY

    And don't bitch about not telling you more plot or f/x, etc... who doesn't know that shit by now?

  • ...

  • At least I can backtrack to read them, once I've actually seen it. I just hate feeling like a wallflower, is all.

  • May 6, 2005, 9:35 a.m. CST

    HAS ANYONE READ THE SUPPOSED 'PLOT SUMMARIES' FOR EPS 7-9????

    by banthafodderUK

    On supershadow.com - Some people believe all his shit - im normally the sort of person to say "no that whole site is a load of bollocks" - BUT a lot of the spoilers i read there WWWAAAAYYYYYY back all appear to be legit. Surely his 'friendship' with lucas is all bullshit??? isn't it??? IJUST DONT GET HOW HE GETS AWAY WITH IT. I reckon that ROTS is going to rake in shitloads of

  • May 6, 2005, 9:39 a.m. CST

    BathafodderUK. . .

    by krullboy

    I have read the Eps 7-9 scripts as well at Supershadow. He said look for work on Episode 7 to begin in 2010, if and only if ROTS takes in $4million US domestically.

  • May 6, 2005, 9:40 a.m. CST

    theres nothing more annoying than being called a "hater"

    by Captain Katanga

    harry calls revenge of the sith a masterpiece, and suddenly the "haters" are defeated. The thing is, "haters" arent doing it for the sake of it, 99 percent of us LOVE the originals, grew up with the originals, and we just cant believe that you anyone can turn a blind eye to how largely awful, and how DIFFERENT the new films are. I genuinely, respectfully believe that many of you are in denial. I was burnt last time round when so many positive reviews came in for attack of the clones, including harrys rave.... i was so hyped up, and will never forget how my jaw just dropped as i had to sit through anakin riding the space potato, big screen sports, dexters diner, obi wan stabbing at a big green crab, threepio's "jokes", R2D2 flying, the "romance", the conveyer belt "action" scene, sonic the hedgehog... well anyway, I really hope the new one is good, ill be at the empire leicester square for the star wars marathon, ill have a nap during attack of the clones, and ill have my fingers crossed for revenge of the sith.

  • May 6, 2005, 9:47 a.m. CST

    Of Haters and Critics. . . .

    by krullboy

    CPT Katanga brings up a point that needs to be addressed. There is a split bewteen SW fans that like the OT and hate the PT, and Talk Backers that HATE EVERYTHING, OT OR PT, RELATED TO STAR WARS. I would say from now on, we call those SW that pledge allegiance to the OT only as "self-inforced rational purists", and those like Minas TirithII who hate all SW as "haters/trolls/tit cheese/smegma". Wow, I think I know what my PhD dissertation will be based upon.

  • May 6, 2005, 9:49 a.m. CST

    revenge of the sith review

    by solobear

    Hey Harry, I know exactly how you feel, man, and I ain't even seen the movie yet! The last few paragraphs of your review brought tears to my eyes. It's nice to know that there's someone out there who feels like I do. I was 15 in '77 and this has been the journey of a lifetime. I don't give a flying fuck what anybody says, Lucas and his posse have truly changed cinema for the better. And I feel truly priviledged to have been along for the ride.

  • May 6, 2005, 9:52 a.m. CST

    It's not about the fanbase

    by Malx

    Lucas can't ignore the money. In fact, that guides his actions far more than any fan noise. He thought Jar Jar was the greatest thing since sliced bread, and then Hasbro took a $200 million bath on merchandising after TPM and, wonder of wonders, now Jar Jar is about as common in the film as his inflatable chair is in people's homes. It's amazing how flexible his Artist's Vision is when the bottom line might be affected. To that end, not only is he apparently punching out a TV series or two, but you can be dead sure there will be Episodes VII-IX. This will keep the gravy train running, allow Lucas to avoid taking artistic risks like all those "independent projects" he's been talking about for 15 years but never quite bothered with, and make it seem like he's giving in to fan demand. And, just as importantly, it lets him keep fans on that "there will be more in 10 years" watch that keeps the toy fires burning like in the 80s and 90s. It's amazing how obvious the whole thing is. Oh, and Lord of the Rings is better than the Prequels, history has already made this judgment. The prequels will always be the homely, unloved stepchild to the family of great trilogies like Lord of the Rings and the original Star Wars films.

  • May 6, 2005, 9:55 a.m. CST

    Great review Harry!

    by daboken

    Seriously...that kinda brought a tear to my eye. This really is the last one! I'm so glad you actually wind up not wanting him to turn...That's what the prequels have been lacking thus far, true emotional investment, and that's what I hope makes this the one we've been waiting for!

  • May 6, 2005, 9:59 a.m. CST

    Nothing at all.

    by Angel Eyes

  • May 6, 2005, 10:03 a.m. CST

    ...........

    by banthafodderUK

    fuck - id be up for 10-12 - why stop at 9? (as long as he doesnt just bash them out star trek style) - AND INDY 4, I HOPE THAT GETS MADE TOO MAN (CONNERY MUST BE IN THAT ONE)

  • May 6, 2005, 10:05 a.m. CST

    Always "Fascist" evil -- never "Communist" evil

    by jorson2

    There are more similarities between the two than some of you guys like to admit. I'd rather give up the minor freedoms under a Fascist society than give up ownership of my life to the government in exchange for socioeconomic equality. Star Wars' creator George Lucas may come down on the liberal side in his personal life, but he's written the movies to be so far removed from our reality that you could label the bad guys anything you want. The only thing distinctly "Fascist" about the Empire is its love of adventure or war. Otherwise, it's the former USSR in my opinion.

  • May 6, 2005, 10:12 a.m. CST

    This is what I was afraid of.

    by JamesURLJonez

    That despite how good (or bad, can't really trust Harry's opinion, ya know) the movie is, I'll walk out of the theater feeling empty because this chapter of my life is over. Here's hoping it's a worthy end to the series.

  • May 6, 2005, 10:16 a.m. CST

    Any end will do.

    by Angel Eyes

    Maybe for episode 10 through 12 Lucas can tell the story of the Gungan Jedi s. Weesa love it!!!!!!!!!

  • May 6, 2005, 10:17 a.m. CST

    Harry, this isn't a review....

    by MattCG

    ...it's a portion of a conversation you have while standing on line at the comic shop with a friend, in an overly loud voice as to annoy the other customers. Did it suck? Was it depressing? Was the story as ass fucking stupid as the comic? These are things I want to know. I couldn't care less about your musings on the world without a STAR WARS movies to look forward to. I'm fairly certain, it's not the last fucking thing you'll see the trademark on. Oh, and there's also a whole big world out there to take avantage of in the meantime.

  • May 6, 2005, 10:17 a.m. CST

    Nothing at all

    by mortsleam

    "Things got so bad, that the good guys had to be a rebellion, where the Jedi had to hide and how evil ruled the galaxy." Sounds like how I felt on Inauguration Day. So, Harry, it's good to know your feelings on the end of the prequel trilogy, and the final Star Wars ever (until Lucas makes 7 through 9), but you never actually told us if it was a good movie, and if it was, what made it a good movie. Sure, it's important to you, but that's not really a review of the quality of the movie, is it? Of course, it's obvious that you are incapable of being objective about this.

  • May 6, 2005, 10:19 a.m. CST

    Great review. I can feel the tears in my eyes. This film will ma

    by Silver_Joo

  • May 6, 2005, 10:22 a.m. CST

    I have a bad feeling about this...

    by MrBoinfoint

    Namely, what will happen when all the fanboys commit suicide because their beloved franchise that they've invested so much in is finale over. Good lord, what will happen? Who will fix our computers? And do our taxes? And sell us popcorn and videos and comic books?

  • May 6, 2005, 10:22 a.m. CST

    Think about it. Gungans with lightsabers and lightning coming ou

    by Angel Eyes

  • May 6, 2005, 10:23 a.m. CST

    "what will happen when all the fanboys commit suicide because th

    by johnnyfartpants

    In one fell stroke, the gene pool will become 100% purer.

  • May 6, 2005, 10:24 a.m. CST

    Just read Variety and Hollywood Reporter. Both have rave review

    by Barry Egan

  • May 6, 2005, 10:24 a.m. CST

    Darth Maul Rumors

    by CatoTheCensor

    Remember the rumors after Ep. I came out that Darth Maul would be back with like a mechanical spider for a lower half. hahhahahah

  • May 6, 2005, 10:26 a.m. CST

    I prefered Star Whores

    by ScottishCynic

    Harry sounds like a kid watching a wrestling match and doesn't know it's fake. "The Rock said that we sucked then hit Stone Cold with a chair. I knew it was coming but it was still bad! I wanted to jump in the ring and save him myself. It was so sad to watch".

  • May 6, 2005, 10:27 a.m. CST

    A Post of No Importance

    by HypeEndsHere

    I was thinking about the "insurgents" in Iraq and how i never really heard the term insurgent before the Iraqi war. then i realized why. if we called the people fighting our forces in Fallujah "rebels" that would romanticize them. they would be the rebellion, making us "The Empire". and most of our soldiers would have a problem with that as they were raised on Star Wars.

  • May 6, 2005, 10:30 a.m. CST

    Take a look at the latest king Kong production diary to see how

    by Angel Eyes

    http://img-nex.kongisking.net/kong/movies/PPD-32WeeksToGo_qt6_high.mov

  • May 6, 2005, 10:33 a.m. CST

    Malx: "Oh, and Lord of the Rings is better than the Prequels, hi

    by Commando Cody

    Really? And how do you figure that? Last I checked at the stores around me all of the LOTR books and DVDs are now on severe markdown -- at my local Target the LOTR DVDs can be had for 9 bucks. So much for staying power. Now they're just trying to get rid of them. Did RETURN OF THE KING get nominated for a Best Picture and even win? Sure did. Which means you can argue its great...or argue it now joins a long, proud list of God awful movies that the Academy gave a golden boy to which everyone NOW slaps their heads and says "How the fuck did a boring bio like GANDI beat E.T.? Who thinks years from now anyone's going to even REMEMBER fucking SHAKESPEARE IN LOVE and think it's a better film than SAVING PRIVATE RYAN? Hell, fanboys love to go on and on about what a sappy, overrated film TITANIC is and it tied for taking home the most Oscars in history. So the whole "award" argument really becomes pretty damn shaky depending how you want to slice it. But, hey, as for as time passing and history judging something, here's a better test for you: Walk up and ask the average person on the street who Obi Wan Kenobi is...then ask who Sam Gangee is. Hum a few bars of John Williams STAR WARS scores (main title, Imperial march, duel of the fates)...then ask the average person you meet if they can hum ANY part of ANY of the LOTR scores. Say "May the force be with you" and see if they can name where it's from...then drop some phrases like "I'm gonna go Orc on your ass" or "He pulled a Frodo" and see if the person won't make a frowning face and look at you confused as they say "What the fuck are you talking about?" The LOTR books are classics in literature, no question about it. But writing off the Prequels which are sequels 4, 5, 6 -- which instantly brings up the amazing tip of the hat over how many franchises COULD sustain a healthy fourth, fifth or sixth film -- is a mistake. Box office wise in the U.S., compare film for film. First LOTR film (FOTR) gets it's ass kicked by PHANTOM MENACE... second films out, Two Towers only beats ATOC by about 25 million (so one rerelease and it beats that as well) and we've yet to see how Sith does compared to ROTK, but it's clear SITH is going to be a monster. So what does it all add up to: ridiculous fucking stick up your ass geek nonsense to declare that "history has made a judgment" when the whopping "historical time" that's passed since the LOTR movies have been able to be judged has been, what, one fucking year? So give us all a break and just drop the "history loves LOTR" crap right now before you look even stupider...

  • May 6, 2005, 10:33 a.m. CST

    Empire, oh my Empire....

    by leokbelo

    I like star wars. I just have a HUUUGE problem with a measel EMPIRE that's supposed to be soooo great and evil and still manages to ONLY LAST FOR 20 + YEARS !!!!!! COME OOOON !!!!!!! THE ROMANS LASTED MUUUUCH LONGER, and they didn't have that technology... Anyways I just think that the writing team should have taken that into consideration...should made at least an Empire that would last some 100 + years...and fuck Luke Skywalker ...put a great great great great son or daugher of whoever...

  • May 6, 2005, 10:35 a.m. CST

    You want realistic special effects......?

    by banthafodderUK

    http://www.kingdong.com

  • May 6, 2005, 10:35 a.m. CST

    Eps 7-9

    by dude_gimme_tabs

    Harrison Ford's career has been in the shitter for a while. Carrie Fisher and Mark Hamill are doing very little. Ditto Billy Dee Williams. They might do one. Anthony Daniels and Peter Mayhew are up for it as they have shown here. Why not just make Episode 7 set 25 years after the battle of Endor and tie it off there ?????

  • May 6, 2005, 10:35 a.m. CST

    "Really don

    by Orionsangels

    I think this socalled review will be updated. Harry's just overwhelmed. He'll get to the real review.

  • May 6, 2005, 10:39 a.m. CST

    "but it's clear SITH is going to be a monster"

    by Angel Eyes

    I agree Commando Cody. An ugly one with hair on its back and false teeth.

  • May 6, 2005, 10:39 a.m. CST

    THIS MOVIE BLEW CHUNKS!

    by Salamander13

    So, Harry, were we at the same movie? 'Cause I was at the same press screening. The original series was hokey, clunky, and a bit silly. But you know what? You cared about the characters. They were real. You could imagine them eating and talking about music or politics or whatever. They were allowed to have personalities. This trilogy has no heart at all. It is a soulless machine designed to bring in the marketing bucks, no more and no less. Watching a wonderful cast try repeatedly to get ANY kind of reaction out of Hayden was sad and laughable. The deliberate use of the shots and lines from "A New Hope" made me ill. And has NO ONE at Skywalker Ranch watched Babylon 5? The space battles were boring! The CGI-enhanced fights were boring and badly edited. When Annie-boy flamed out on the volcano planet, I wanted to cheer. 5 minutes of Wookies. Oh joy. Gee, thanks, George. And the writing. Oy vey. Very glad I only wasted time on this turd. Go see it somewhere that serves beer or hard alcohol. You'll need it.

  • May 6, 2005, 10:41 a.m. CST

    Salamander13

    by banthafodderUK

    so you didn't like it then? ; )

  • May 6, 2005, 10:46 a.m. CST

    Thank you, Harry - *sigh*, I can't wait!

    by viola123

    That was awesome. Wonderful review and hopefully this one will be picked up by all the wires; hopefully the news will get out to the media and this will be what they report this time around. The media, I'm nervous. Almost as if they don't want "Revenge of the Sith" to succeed, as if it'll be a bigger story if it doesn't. Well, your review, Herc's, everyone's I've read (include "Variety") has told me what I need to know - and all I can cheer is "yes!" Thank you, Mr. Lucas. I cannot wait to see myself and gush and have all the heartache you write of. It's going to be amazing. But yeah, just reading about what happens, how it happens - leaves me feeling so very sad. Incredible stuff!!

  • May 6, 2005, 10:48 a.m. CST

    "I cannot wait to see myself and gush and have all the heartache

    by johnnyfartpants

    WTF?

  • May 6, 2005, 10:54 a.m. CST

    Big Ass Spoiler

    by stlfilmwire

    Do not read if you haven't seen the movie:..................................Hey Harry... what shocks me is how nobody talks about how Palp IS Anakin's father... or atleast the male behind his creation. I saw the film with a group of media chums and nobody even mentioned that. It was hard for me to understand how it is revealed so matter-of-factly during Palp's story about Plagius's "apprentice" AKA Palp. He says he learned how to create a life... and then he killed Plagius. You think there would have been some dramatic build up when they said that... thus explaining how Anakin's mom had no father.

  • May 6, 2005, 10:54 a.m. CST

    Harry's Review

    by sundancekeed

    Harry's a fan of Star Wars. He wrote a piece from that perspective, not as simply a nuts and bolts, pros and cons dissertation. You want a "review", go read Roger Ebert.

  • May 6, 2005, 10:58 a.m. CST

    Commando Cody...

    by Captain Katanga

    So its about box office is it? the prequels are better because of box office? does that make Titanic, a film you clearly love, better than all of them? Lol you even torpedo your own vacuous argument by pointing out that two towers made more than AOTC, and that clones "only" needs a re release to beat it! Oh and the prequels are better because more people know who obi wan is? That wouldnt have anything to do with the fact that the prequels are riding on the coattails of the original classics would it? The same goes for the music. heres something... why don you have the guts to drop your smoke screen arguments and compare the prequels with LOTR according to the only things that really matter: script, direction, acting, special effects, heart, soul etc. THATS where your bombastic arguments collapse.

  • May 6, 2005, 10:59 a.m. CST

    Salamander 13: "And has NO ONE at Skywalker Ranch watched Babylo

    by Triumph poops!

    Thanks, dude, for the most utterly laughable hater line yet. Really, you brought tears to my eyes with that crock of shit. But good timing -- I needed that chuckle today!

  • May 6, 2005, 11:01 a.m. CST

    Re: Realistic SFX

    by Darth Busey

    How can anybody bitch about "realistic" special effects when we are talking about space operas and giant monkeys?

  • May 6, 2005, 11:02 a.m. CST

    Chuckle did you? Hihihihihihihi!!!

    by Angel Eyes

  • May 6, 2005, 11:04 a.m. CST

    revenge

    by coolfan

    some of us get it harry. i never thought this day would come.

  • May 6, 2005, 11:05 a.m. CST

    The diary in question deals with SS Venture models and movement.

    by Angel Eyes

    And gorillas exist, Gungans don't.

  • May 6, 2005, 11:06 a.m. CST

    stlfilmwire - ** SPOILER, A REAL ONE ** from what i've...

    by banthafodderUK

    ...read in the novelisation- it pretty much hints that palpenstein created anakin through his power to manipulate the midichlorians - i think lucas wants it left up in the air for us all to discuss to the nth degree (damn i made a vow to never use the phrase 'nth degree') - its the same with the 'is general grievous a force user or not?' Good point man

  • May 6, 2005, 11:08 a.m. CST

    I don't believe a lot of shit...

    by Cpt Kirks 2pay

    ...that Harry says in his reviews. Everyone should take it with a pinch of salt. I seriously want to kick the shit outta him for all the OTT orgasmic write ups he writes for shite films like Blade 2, Van Helsing etc. Gotta do a lot of reading between the lines on this review here everyone. Look for comments that DO matter also, where does it rate next to ANH or ESB. Oh, and stay away from lines that have the word 'EVER!!' and 'most', 'best' or 'est' in them. We all know 2 months down the line, people who write such lines, normally change their minds, especially Harry. Not saying what he says he doesn't exactly mean, but he overplays his opinions so many times. Just be a little bit wary of him guys. remember, in his whole Blade 2 review, he said all way through, it was like somone going down on him. OK, that might be true. The film was wet, proper hariy, it stank of old piss, and most of all, was full of old shit. DAMN! Those, KLINGONS!!!

  • May 6, 2005, 11:10 a.m. CST

    Awesome Harry

    by TheChosenOne

    There are a few of us out there who stood in line with our dads in 77'. My dad took me to all three, played action figures with me, dressed up as vader for birthday parties, made sure all the little UPC's were clipped so special kenner send off's could be had-- all of it. My dad passed away before the prequel trilogy, but now I have a son who I can geek out with on all this star wars goodness. So to me, this is the circle completed too. I know it's dark and pg-13 etc etc, but I'll be damned if my boy isn't going to sit on my shoulders in line for this(I'll just cover his eyes for the immolation bit).

  • May 6, 2005, 11:11 a.m. CST

    CPT KIRK

    by banthafodderUK

    DID YOU POST THE PACKAGE?

  • May 6, 2005, 11:16 a.m. CST

    Death By Falling: My Lucas Theory

    by stlfilmwire

    Notice how everyone falls to their doom? .....(minor spoiler)... could Mace still technically be alive? Could he return as an old geezer in later movies? We never saw him land.

  • May 6, 2005, 11:20 a.m. CST

    Buzzer going off: EHHHH! Sorry, Katanga, but Cody's right.

    by Triumph poops!

    You take all the factors he rattled off AND toss in other things as well such as toy sales or things that KIDS gobbled up and actually WANTED to own and have (be it action figures, ships, models, pajamas, stuffed ewoks to take to bed) and take into account even how many people in the arts have been influenced by SW vs. LOTR...and Cody's right. History is FAR MORE on the side of SW at this point. And as for the Prequels, my kids LOVE them but I can't get them to sit still for LOTR. Does my kid want to be Frodo? Hell no. Does he love his McGregor Obi Wan in his prime costume his mom made him? Oh, hell yeah. And, yes, he even likes Jar Jar and looooooooves the Ewoks. to me there's NO QUESTION...given my firsthand experience with my kids or with friends families where we take the kids out...that even the Prequels are having more of an effect on kids than LOTR did. Which means that as time passes, gee, which do you think in their minds "history" will favor? Look, all Cody was asserting is that it was completely ridiculous -- and it was -- for someone to even make such a lame ass comment that "history" (after only one fucking year) was on LOTR's side. And when you say "Oh and the prequels are better because more people know who obi wan is?" the answer is DUH. YEAH. Isn't the POINT of "history judging something"? That it's REMEMBERED and NOT forgotten? That it makes an impact and thus it's NOT wiped away in the sands of time? So yes -- people being able to rattle names off the top of their heads IS a clearer indication of "which way" history is going to tip. As for arguing the artistic merits of the Prequels vs. LOTR, bring it on, Big Guy, because the Prequels at their worst are infinitely better artistically and technically then the LOTR films which were the cure for insomnia. Give me a break, ROTK was all right, but certainly overrated and filled with some shoddy effects for sure. Not to mention some lame ass payoffs. Fuck, we sit through 9 hours to get to an epic conclusion and the fight's over all because some deus ex machina green ghosts who were just introduced swirl through a city in 60 seconds flat? That's it? Not to mention ROTK has the most BORING and BADLY edited ending in recent memory where the movie just ends and ends and ends and ends and ends...not to mention its the most maudlin and gayest ending in genre history. Oh, look! We're little guys (ala boys) jumping on a bed hugging and embracing each other in real slow motion while the music plays...all while that full-sized Man stands off to the side and looks at us longingly. Give me a fucking break. ROTK = POOREST AND MOST BORING GENRE MOVIE ENDING EVER. Not to mention Michael Jackson must have the ending to ROTK cued up nightly...

  • May 6, 2005, 11:21 a.m. CST

    SS Venture models

    by banthafodderUK

    What have the nazi's got to do with all this???? ; D

  • May 6, 2005, 11:23 a.m. CST

    DVD order post.

    by Cpt Kirks 2pay

    Next week.

  • May 6, 2005, 11:23 a.m. CST

    Harry's Review

    by Darth Thoth

    I freakin' loved it! Classic! Thank you my brother! I cannot wait for this movie any longer. Simply put, the next two weeks are going to be the longest of my life!! Thank you for your review Harry. I felt it on every level and totally dig and vibe with what you were trying to say. And what Lucas was trying to say for that matter. I'm glad to see he has redeemed himself. Star Wars really is Lucas' story. I can't freakin' wait for this movie. This is it! My life comes to this! Fandom comes to this. I can't friggin' wait. When the credits roll I know I'm going to be in tears and I can't freakin' wait! Bring it on! Bring it on!! Bring it ON!!!!!!!!

  • May 6, 2005, 11:23 a.m. CST

    I predict that this will be a MONSTER talkback...

    by johnnyfartpants

    MONSTER.

  • May 6, 2005, 11:25 a.m. CST

    Damn Fine Review

    by pilferk

    Great job, Harry. You do a great job of doing something no other reviewer has done: Explaining the whole "balance to the force" stuff. I think you do justice to the fact that, in Eps 1 - 3, the Jedi are flawed...perhaps not as flawed as the Emperor is..or maybe MORESO than he is, because at least he's true to himself. And Luke really does bring the balance back....not being an indoctrinated, heartless prick but not giving in to the emotions of hate, either. Great Job!

  • May 6, 2005, 11:29 a.m. CST

    BIG QUESTION: WITH SPOILER

    by stlfilmwire

    .........how come Palp doesn't tell Luke, "Don't kill me, I'm just your old grandpa."... hehe

  • May 6, 2005, 11:37 a.m. CST

    IM OFF HOME

    by banthafodderUK

    HAVE A GOOD WEEKEND PEOPLE

  • May 6, 2005, 11:39 a.m. CST

    Harrys Reviews = Paula Abduls Critiques ... 'Speed 2 is GREAT fu

    by Baron Karza

  • May 6, 2005, 11:40 a.m. CST

    a few thoughts/questions

    by Right Bastard

    1) can anyone write a spoiler-free review of this flick? 2) Can anyone who is middle of the road write a review? Either someone who likes SW, but isn't a fanatic; or someone who likes OT, but not WT? 3) If I were able to read Harry's Spoilerific review, I wouldn't trust it, because he initially liked TPM, and then backtracked when it was o.k. to admit that it wasn't very good. 4) Since I can't read Harry's review, how many references did he make to blow jobs, wanking it, and such?

  • May 6, 2005, 11:46 a.m. CST

    Nice one, Harry -- good for you. There's alot of us out here wi

    by Commando Cody

    It really dawned on me, too, just the other night that this was IT. The last time I'd be going into a theater to see SW on the big screen. As a kid I was there in line in '77 (actually in line over and over and over again!) and today as I hold my SITH tickets that I bought in advance for next week, I feel alive and totally pumped up to the max that I'm finally going to see it conclude, that I'm finally going to see the DUEL (well, barring a car hitting me in the next 14 days!)...but at the same time, I also suddenly feel old. Has it really been a hair away from 30 years getting here? Wow. That's a lot of life passing by. A lot of memories from all sorts of things to contemplate on. When the credits roll on SITH, I really will feel like a part of my life has finally come to a close. Sure there will be all-new chapters in life, all-new things to do or get excited about, but SW will always be a treasured thing to me. I can't wait to see it...and to George Lucas who's out there somewhere finally sitting down and relaxing, I'd certainly like to say thanks for 30 years of absolutely great geek times. The journey from there to here WAS worth it for sure and I think there are MILLIONS of us in the world who wouldn't trade it for the world.

  • May 6, 2005, 11:48 a.m. CST

    emeraldboy

    by DocPazuzu

    Do you hear that rumble in the distance? That's a horde of rabid fanboys and sadistic talkbackers who just read your post and caught a whiff of your blood. Saying on the one hand that you write reviews as a "hobby" and then proceeding to use professionals in order to trash what is in essence another "hobbyist", albeit with more notoriety, was a self-imposed death sentence. I'm not necessarily disagreeing or agreeing with you, but prepare yourself for the reaming of a lifetime.

  • May 6, 2005, 11:49 a.m. CST

    The only film reviewer I respect

    by Right Bastard

    is Henry Rollins on IFC. You make some interesting points, Emeraldboy. But, as much crap as I give Harry for his poorly written sexually obnoxious reviews, he says quite openly that this site is about the movie going experience, more than an being about a strict critique on art. It remindes of the Simpsons where Homer was a food critic, and wrote nothing but positive reviews. This upset all the other reviewers who told him he had to start writing negatively. When he buckled to the pressure, everything that was great about his column was missing. As full of crap as I think HK can be sometimes, at least you know what you're going to get with him, and why.

  • May 6, 2005, 11:51 a.m. CST

    That was an awesome review Harry

    by flipster

    You touched a lot of key points that have been sorely missed in many discussions/reviews. Good on you. Truly excellent - maybe your most concise, correct and compelling post on these boards ever.

  • May 6, 2005, 11:55 a.m. CST

    I love the smell...

    by Childe Roland

    ...of monkeytennis?'s flingings in the morning. Your insight served you well. I did read the talkback. But the only reason we might bicker would be if you, again, typed something stupid. Oh... wait... you did. Hope you scrubbed your salad bowl well with some good disinfectant after that tossing. Mom's been dead and rotting for years. As for Harry's "review," it may be just a gush of pent-up fanboy emotion, but it does give me some amount of hope that the movie will appeal to what's left of my inner Star Wars geek. If Harry was incapable of pointing out even one of the gaping flaws we've heard tell of in the other reviews (many of which were also largely positive), then maybe the experience of Sith is greater than the sum of its parts (and almost certainly it's greater than the sum of the last two movies combined). That'd be a nice way for George to go out, even if he does leave us all down and funky. Here's hoping.

  • May 6, 2005, 11:56 a.m. CST

    "When the Sith hits the fan..."

    by symphy

    :)

  • May 6, 2005, 11:56 a.m. CST

    Blah, Blah, Fucking Blah

    by roanmairin

    If you crybabies don't like Harry's reviews and don't like this site quit coming here. Fucking idiots.

  • May 6, 2005, 11:57 a.m. CST

    emeraldboy

    by johnnyfartpants

    You might write reviews as a hobby but 1) learn to spell, 2) learn to punctuate, and 3) you're a snob. A PhD is not a sign of a good critic, and neither is a house full of paintings. Oh, agus conas ata tu?

  • May 6, 2005, 12:12 p.m. CST

    Why this is actually one of Harry's better reviews

    by PhilConnors

    I disagree with Emeraldboy that a good review has negative points. In my opinion, a good review is neither "positive" or "negative," but it instead by its analysis of its subject focuses on the meaning of it all. And that's why this review is quite good (for Harry). He actually limits the hyperbole to the one line about it being a masterpiece, and instead focuses on the meaning of story.

  • May 6, 2005, 12:35 p.m. CST

    Yoda ate my balls..

    by BigEOz

    and Lucas took another $10 from me

  • May 6, 2005, 12:39 p.m. CST

    Show some respect

    by BillEmic

    I agree with a lot of people's comments on Harry's reviews - they're certainly less than perfect, and very flawed as a piece of journalism. However, I don't come to this website to read unbiased, strictly professional reviews - and I'm guessing that, deep down, the rest of you don't either (otherwise you would have split long ago). I like to read Harry's reviews because I enjoy seeing reviews written by someone who has as much unadulterated and gushing fanboy enthusiasm as me. Okay, yeah, he definitely goes overboard - but to me it's just cool to have a relatively popular website like this where the geek voice can be heard. Say what you want about Harry but he has kept the faith alive and he's a never-ending source of energy and support for the industry. Besides, the fact that he usually finds something good about every bad movie (Van Helsing, etc.) lets you know that a movie he almost walked out of (House of Wax) has got to be abject shit.

  • May 6, 2005, 12:41 p.m. CST

    You lost me at Karl Rove

    by emarkp

    Anyone who uses the names "Karl Rove" or "James Carville" is to fixated on politics for me to care about their opinion. Have a better one.

  • May 6, 2005, 12:51 p.m. CST

    Your Blah Blah Blah review

    by phonoking

    Harry I love Star Wars too...first and foremost,please why not give an honest nonbias opinion ---your positive ramblings have cost me money,ever think about that????Matrix Revolutions,Attack of The Clones,Sin City,---That said Mr Lucas will never get me to buy into this character arc----Lukes potential turn is a hell of alot more convincing than this,I also must say Lukes and Padme opinion that there is still good in Vader seems crazy when I review the prequels----Theres nothing redeeming or heroric or even selfless about Annies character,The only true heroic thing (good,or Heroic)we see as a viewer is when he chucks Palpatine down the shaft --Anny wasnt doublecrossed or forced to turn ...he was a retard that just chose that way to go....seems all too lame.Oh yea you owe me some cash Harry

  • May 6, 2005, 12:55 p.m. CST

    Great review Harry.

    by antonphd

    I am not a big Star Wars fan, but I can't wait for this movie.

  • May 6, 2005, 1:03 p.m. CST

    Anakin Should Have = Han Solo

    by Sean38

    When we first met Anakin in Episode I, he SHOULD have been a teenager and he should have been wild, reckless, rougish and charasmatic. He should have been a young Han Solo. When we first met Han (previous to Lucas fucking up the scene with Greedo) Han wasn't a "good" person. He had good in him but it's the course of events from Episode IV on that shape him into the good man he becomes. You could imagine another set of circumstances having the exact opposite effect and Solo going evil. Anakin should have been the same type of figure. Someone with the potential for both good AND evil, but someone we care about. Someone who is a natural born leader. Someone who Padme could fall for against her better judgement just as Leia fell for Han. Imagine if, instead of encountering Anakin as an 8-year-old pod racer, Obi-Wan first meets Anakin in space over Tattooine as Anakin recuses Padme's ship which has been followed and is under attack. Would lend more creedence to the line, "When I met your father he was already a great pilot." Oh well...woulda, coulda, shoulda.

  • May 6, 2005, 1:09 p.m. CST

    The only children that will ever be present in Harry's life:

    by Nice Marmot

    His nephew and his invisible 6 year old self. Spooky & sad.

  • May 6, 2005, 1:22 p.m. CST

    But OMG liek what R some SPIOLERS????

    by 1908LOL

    Sith Happens www.cafepress.com/sithhappens

  • May 6, 2005, 1:22 p.m. CST

    Glowing reviews, so what?

    by Angel Eyes

    Put your head up your ass if you want to. Star Wars will be remembered for the infantile garbage it is. What about good acting, dialogue and believable emotions?

  • May 6, 2005, 1:24 p.m. CST

    Worst Review Ever

    by Fphotographer

    Harry I like your site and I give you props for doing such a stern job of doing such a great job with the site. However, this review of ROTS is possible the worst review of any film I have ever read. You have not kept a clear head or even ballance about what's good and what's bad but have just ranted away with pointless information about yourself and your dad. How about a decent review..?

  • May 6, 2005, 1:28 p.m. CST

    and the haters will STILL GO SEE IT

    by la_sith

    I love it. "You're all a bunch of fucking slaves!" - Jim Morrison

  • May 6, 2005, 1:35 p.m. CST

    Beat me to it.

    by TommyThePumpkin

    This really is the worst review I have ever read. I want the three minutes of my life I spent reading it back.

  • May 6, 2005, 2 p.m. CST

    I'm easy to get a rise out of?

    by Childe Roland

    Seems to me, monkeytennis?, your wee willy must stand at attention when the wind blows if a dead woman was able to get you off last night. Counting down to weak/unfunny comeback... 3... 2...

  • May 6, 2005, 2 p.m. CST

    Jedi are Democrats - Republicans are Sith

    by PlasmaOrb

    Funny how when Harry was talking about how the Jedi are clueless and the Sith are out to destroy everything with their fascist regime. Almost sounds like modern politics.. cause the evil empire which is the Republicans today and the clueless jedis trying to help but really cant cause they are wimps deep down are the Democrats. Darth Bush and Emperor Cheney... Star Wars 3.5 Revenge of the Shitheads

  • May 6, 2005, 2:01 p.m. CST

    That's the best thing you've ever written

    by AlwaysThere

    Congratulations Harry. You've finally matured and become respectable.

  • May 6, 2005, 2:11 p.m. CST

    All Your Memories Are Belong To Us

    by Comsat_Angel

    ***Listening to Harry talk about his first

  • May 6, 2005, 2:15 p.m. CST

    TRIUMPH POOPS... YOUVE GOT KIDS???!!!

    by Captain Katanga

    I could have SWORN you werent a day older than 16, same with Cody. I would have bet my star wars marathon tickets on it. I cant believe you are actually bringing TOY SALES to the table. Whilst I agree that history currently favours star wars to lotr, this is due to the ORIGINALS, NOT THE PREQUELS, WHICH BACKS UP MY ENTIRE FUCKING POINT. The orignals ARE better than LOTR. The prequels, by any fucking standard, ARE NOT. and for the second time today, obi wan IS a more loved character than any character from LOTR... BECAUSE OF THE ORIGINALS. NOT. THE. PREQUELS. AM I STARTING TO GET THROUGH TO YOU YET? It staggers me that you can sing the praises of the prequels, and then criticise return of the king for shoddy effects!!! And then you come out with your greatest line, truly a keeper. This is the line that proves that i'm truly wasting my breath talking to someone like you, a horseshit line of such blinkered IDIOCY that I dont even have to bother tearing it apart. This is the line that reminds everyone who feels let down by the prequels that it is utterly pointless trying to talk sense to people like Triumph poops: "the Prequels at their worst are infinitely better artistically and technically then the LOTR films". LOL, ive had enough, goodbye star wars talkbacks, I love you...

  • May 6, 2005, 2:25 p.m. CST

    USELESS NEGATIVITY

    by solobear

    It is sad indeed to find so much negativity about something that has nurtured such a sense of wonder for so many people. I think that all of you overly negative anti-STAR WARS types should keep your lowlife opinions to yourself and go listen to a Michael Jackson record or go get in line for a Woody Allen film, because that is probably the only thing that will satisfy your warped ideas of entertainment. STAR WARS will live on long after all of your words have faded and been forgotten. I hoist my middle finger at you and your sad reams of bullshit.

  • May 6, 2005, 2:36 p.m. CST

    Another fanboy gush.

    by performingmonkey

    Maybe if you work yourself up into a crazed frenzy (like Harry) you'll love any movie. He gushed all over AOTC, which was quite simply the worst SW movie, with so much pitiful shit. Dig up his AOTC review if you dare (unless it's been deleted), where he says how clever the movie is. Notice how Harry didn't actually review Revenge Of The Sith just now. He reviewed his own obsession with the Original Trilogy and his insane delusion about the prequels. I think he should view the movie again and give us a REAL review. Go read the script of ROTS - you will see that it still contains bullshit that no-one wants to see such as the totally meaningless Wookiee action and General Grievous. Also, the Yoda/Sidious fight is lame (on paper, at least) and we've seen most of it in trailers/TV spots. Mace Windu was only included in the prequels so that there would be someone with a little importance to die in Episode 3 (apart from Padme), and yet who gives a shit if he lives or dies anyway. He means nothing, he's just another Jedi. Of the characters we care about, Obi-Wan seems to be written the best, with Anakin still spouting 'it's not fair'-style fanboy whineings (er, I mean young Jedi whineings) and his turn to the Dark Side ISN'T BELIEVABLE!! Well, in the script it isn't. Hopefully Hayden's acting will convince us of something that Lucas simply hasn't got right in the screenplay - in all 3 screenplays. I'd say the most important thing in Episode 3 is Anakin's turn, and Lucas couldn't even nail that! I'll give him some credit, he DID set it up in AOTC with Anakin's mother dying and Ani saying he will learn to stop people from dying, which Palpatine basically offers him in ROTS. But the way he goes from wondering what he should do one second to slaughtering Jedi the next is WAY too abrupt. The biggest problem with ROTS is that this is the one we've always known the plot for.

  • May 6, 2005, 2:45 p.m. CST

    solobear

    by Angel Eyes

    Star Wars will be remembered for the awfull prequals and special editions. You know it, Lucas knows it and your sister who is sitting in front of me with my dick down her throath agrees.

  • May 6, 2005, 2:57 p.m. CST

    Karl Rove comment

    by zacdilone

    C'mon Harry...you're better than that. This is "Star Wars" for goodness' sake. Cheap shots like that are beneath you, especially given the fun and positive atmosphere surrounding this film. Discussion of ROTS should be apolitical. Stupid move.

  • May 6, 2005, 2:58 p.m. CST

    *Spoilers*

    by SnowMann

    Really, is that word so fucking hard to write?

  • May 6, 2005, 3:04 p.m. CST

    Angel Eyes

    by solobear

    First off, you can't even spell prequel correctly, which says a lot about you. And if my sister had YOUR dick in her mouth, she'd just bite the little thing off and spit it back into your pitiful face as you screamed in agony, all while I watched and laughed. But I doubt you have a dick, so you've just wasted more of the space that should be reserved for those with honest heartfelt opinions. Chew on that you closet Homo.

  • May 6, 2005, 3:22 p.m. CST

    Answer to Grievous question...

    by stlfilmwire

    It's not as cool as you want to think. As a matter of fact, here's my SW favorite 3 lightsaber battles (including Revenge... which I just saw): 1) Luke Vs. Darth in ROTJ 2) Darth Maul Vs. Obi and Liam in Phantom 3) Luke Vs. Darth in ESB. Grievous isn't as bad as you want him to be.

  • May 6, 2005, 3:25 p.m. CST

    Why I didn't like the Anakin vs Obi fight as much as some of the

    by stlfilmwire

    The lava didn't really seem to add much tension. It acted more as a visual distraction than it did help. Would have much rather seen them fight in an empty room or something.

  • May 6, 2005, 3:31 p.m. CST

    I thought the movie rocked.

    by Carson Dyle

    I should preface this by saying I

  • May 6, 2005, 3:38 p.m. CST

    johnnyfartpants - what?!

    by viola123

    I can't believe I just wrote your handle out, but alas, I did. What was your reply to? What was unclear about what I wrote? Did you read Harry's review? I take it you didn't. If you did, you'd understand what I wrote perfectly. Sigh, I guess you just came to TalkBack to grip? Whatever.

  • May 6, 2005, 3:49 p.m. CST

    oooooooooo, notice how Harry......

    by bigjeffrey

    ....was utterly inconclusive. He doesn't want to let his "geek head" get him into trouble again like the last two times (Ep II: "Lucas nailed it!" anyone?). This could suck or it could be a nice sendoff for the prequels but it will never be "great". The greatness of Star Wars ended when Lucas thought it was possible to create atmosphere on a computer screen!

  • May 6, 2005, 3:59 p.m. CST

    SalvatoreGravano -

    by Itchy

    Hogan as Vader ? I know you were kidding, but that's genius ! "Luke - I am your father, BROTHER". I'm really geeked about this flick. I didn't want to be, but I am. I was pretty disappointed in TPM, but actually really liked AOTC (mainly for the Natalie Portman Smuggling Pebbles in the Desert shots). This sounds like the perfect intersection of TOS and the new trilogy. Too bad I won't be able to see it until 5/22 at the earliest (damn having a job)

  • May 6, 2005, 4 p.m. CST

    carrots

    by loafroaster

    Lasr ever Star Wars experience? Come on, do you think Lucas is gonna end the money-making juggernaught thats kept him in checked shirts for the last 28 years? Expect special editions of the prequels, super double secret editions of the OT, television, animation, prequels to prequels, spin-offs...talk about too much of a good thing...

  • May 6, 2005, 4:01 p.m. CST

    Finally, a Positive review from someone who hated TPM and AOTC

    by Right Bastard

    On Stern this morning, Robin Quivers said that she saw ROTS last night, and didn't want it to stop. She hated TPM, and didn't care for AOTC. If she had hated ROTS, she would have said so. Finally, a ray of hope from a reviewer I somewhat trust....oh, and I wish I had trusted some of you TBers. I saw HGttG last night. Bloody Awful.

  • May 6, 2005, 4:14 p.m. CST

    Geez Harry, it's going to take hours to wipe that spurt of Nosta

    by Rolling_Stone

    So what were the spoilers? I thought this article had a spoiler warning on it.

  • May 6, 2005, 4:15 p.m. CST

    harry's real review is here :

    by gould

    http://www.somethingawful.com/isnotitcoolnews/index.html :-))

  • May 6, 2005, 4:19 p.m. CST

    Question for Harry

    by Doc_Strange

    Do you think the independent contractors who worked on the second Death Star were innocent victims or did they deserve to be killed by the alliance? Oh yeah and this movie's gonna rock!!! Hell Yeah!!

  • May 6, 2005, 4:30 p.m. CST

    Yeah, but he loved AOTC too...

    by Rupee88

    not sure if he shares most of our tastes when it comes to SW.....And of course this won't be the last film, you naive people. There will be many more SW movies becuase they make big money for whoever produces them.

  • May 6, 2005, 4:30 p.m. CST

    In my dreams, this is how EP III ends...

    by GrandoCarIissian

    First off, I'm surprised none of these ROTS reviews have mentioned the part where young Lando steals the Millennium Falcon to go to a party, Sidious' black lightsaber, or the part where Yoda ignites himself, blinding Sidious and burning his skin. Oh well, I guess they must've changed those parts. I don't know how Lucas' version of ROTS ends, but here's how mine would end: Obi-Wan arrives on Tatooine in his Jedi Starfighter after having delivered Leia to Bail Organa on Alderaan. Holding Luke in one arm, he turns around and uses his force powers to cause the starfighter to sink into the sand, the opposite of how Yoda used those powers to raise Luke's X-Wing on Dagobah. Cut to Owen Lars' homestead. A young Uncle Owen is outside working on something while Beru is inside. Owen looks up and sees a cloaked figure approaching through the desert. As he watches the figure get closer, Beru comes out and joins her husband. We see Obi-Wan, wearing the same cloak and carrying a bundle, approach the Lars', pull down his hood and introduce himself. After explaining what has happened to Anakin and about Luke, he hands the bundle to Beru. She pulls down the blanket to reveal baby Luke's face. Obi-Wan looks down at Luke one last time and whispers the last line of the film: "May the Force be with you." This time that line is loaded with extra meaning, because Obi-Wan knows that only with the Force will the child before him have any chance of growing up to overthrow the Empire and Vader. Obi-Wan puts his hood back up and walks back the way he came. Owen and Beru watch, then look back down at baby Luke. Cut to baby Luke's face in his blankets looking back up at them. Owen and Beru look back up in time to see Obi-Wan disappearing into the horizon. Music cues and credits roll.

  • May 6, 2005, 4:36 p.m. CST

    Spoiler for Towelie

    by stlfilmwire

    *SPOILER*..........R2D2 doesn't have his memory wiped. Only C3PO does. You are right. That is why R2 gets programmed by Leia... because R2 is her property (at the time.)

  • May 6, 2005, 4:41 p.m. CST

    Shadow of the Torturer

    by 999666

    Yeah! The dark side is better, you can shoot lightning out of your hands! I can't wait to see Luke's Mom choked out by his Dad! Shadow of the Torturer and the rest of Gene Wolfe's tetrology have made it difficult to give 2 fucks about Starwars lately. I just read it. This would be an insane concept to adapt for film. anyone ever read this?

  • May 6, 2005, 4:47 p.m. CST

    Beautiful review

    by allykatD

    Perfect. I think you have to be a Star Wars geek to really get behind it and understand the emotion and what exactly Harry's saying. I hear it loud and clear, Harry. Beautiful.

  • May 6, 2005, 4:49 p.m. CST

    Teh Suck.....

    by Doc_Strange

    When Luke went to Bespin, he didn't save his friends, the Imperials set a trap for him, he actually made the situation worse as he got his ass kicked by Vader and lost a hand. It was only through the aid of Lando that they escaped and they had to save Luke. In retrospect, if Luke had in fact finished his training at Dagobah, he wouldn't have lost a hand, his friends would still be OK and he would have been a far better Jedi Knight.

  • May 6, 2005, 5:02 p.m. CST

    response to sparklecopy

    by AshFett

    sparklecopy, Lucas didn't say the films were for children (though he did say they'd never be Terminator or The Matrix if that's what you wanted). I remember an interview in Premiere when Phantom Menace opened and he specifically said that Episode I was a children's film, Episode II would be a romance and Episode III would be very dark and he felt the least successful financially for that reason. I admit it's kind of weird to have a series begin with a cutesy movie with farts and two sequels later have little kids murdered and a man burned alive by lava, but Lucas DID say he was basically going to do just that since 99.

  • May 6, 2005, 5:03 p.m. CST

    You mean...?

    by Rebeck

    Lucas FINALLY got it right after three misfires?? (You heard me, ROTJ sucks as well) OK...just per the prequels, you mean he finally got it to where IT SHOULD HAVE BEEN AT "PHANTOM MENACE"??? Yeah, not so sad over here, sorry... I've never seen more people clinging to desperate hope and nostalgia over a "series" that has exactly one great movie in it. Now, 2? And Harry sounds like he's ready to commit suicide. I saw the first one when I was 14 and it meant exactly zip shit to me. Today it's pretty embarrassing I think. ESB did the real damage by blowing me away and raising it to a level and tone it would never reach again. You know...I'm a Bond fan, and yeah, I've been very disappointed with the last few films, but hey...at least MY obsession has 20 fucking movies to choose from! Oh yeah, and more to come...heh heh heh. I'm sorry - to each his own.

  • May 6, 2005, 5:04 p.m. CST

    A great review but.......

    by Plazola_MEX

    It

  • May 6, 2005, 5:11 p.m. CST

    Awesome review!

    by Lord_Soth

    But who wrote this?

  • May 6, 2005, 5:17 p.m. CST

    They mean realistic in that the F/X's look like something that r

    by Orionsangels

    It has weight and mass and the sun reflects off it. It moves in a cool fashion and some effects are shown from bold angles that have never been attempted before.

  • May 6, 2005, 5:23 p.m. CST

    To Be Fair

    by Rebeck

    This is an objective review from a solid critic - http://www.variety.com/VE1117927015.html So the word is definitely good. And yeah, I'll still go see it, will be hoping for the best.

  • May 6, 2005, 5:24 p.m. CST

    yes assholes, harry speaks about the essence of tragedy, the old

    by atomheartbrother

    so put your puds away you darth vader rape fantasizing dickweeds (because really, other than romantic love, how else do you come up with luke and leia?) and repeat after me: comedy (I) + romance (II) + tragedy (III) + the heroic quest to face destiny and redeem that tragedy (IV, V, VI) = pure fucking genius. and pure fucking modern mythology.

  • May 6, 2005, 5:32 p.m. CST

    Thanks Rebeck

    by Plazola_MEX

    Now let's wait for MinasTirith2....let's see what shite comes out of his fucking mouth

  • May 6, 2005, 5:34 p.m. CST

    Nicely written review

    by Thing-Fish

    That was a beautiful review, Harry. Can't wait to see this movie. ____________ The statement "support our troops" is a bunch of nonsense. It's a meaningless statement - what matters is whether or not you support the policies. And the current policy is massmurdering 100.000+ civilians in favor of controlling natural resources. I don't support that.

  • May 6, 2005, 5:57 p.m. CST

    I've seen it!!! Harry's right!

    by dmbfreak

    For all of you clowns who think that Harry is full of shit, kiss my ass. Yesterday I got into a screening here in Salt Lake. All I can say is that Harry sums up every emotion and feeling you will have in ROTS. It is a tragedy 27 years in the making. A masterpiece. Your expectations will be met, and passed as you see this, the final instalment. I lost faith in Star Wars after episodes I & II. Frankly it's because they weren't up to par with the originals. But this one. This one. This one takes it past the point. This one redeems the shit that Lucas has put us through. This one is brilliant. This is exactly what Lucas needed.

  • May 6, 2005, 5:58 p.m. CST

    BEST LUCAS ARTICLE EVER

    by Iblis_mage

    http://www.landoverbaptist.org/news0405/lucaswatch.html

  • May 6, 2005, 6:02 p.m. CST

    I HAVE NO DOUBT ABOUT ROTS AND HARRY....

    by Plazola_MEX

    Sure It will kick some fucking hairy ass....but i like to see other reviews to have a better point of view of what's going on.

  • May 6, 2005, 6:07 p.m. CST

    SITH review

    by dmbfreak

    Plazola_MEX ---> if you want anther review, give me your email address and I'll send you my review. It isn't finished yet, but well on it's way.

  • May 6, 2005, 6:13 p.m. CST

    Fuck all religious fanatism.......

    by Plazola_MEX

    LUCAS WATCH........FUCK U ALL FANATICS!!!! You fanatics are a shit and a shame. How can these losers mix pure entertainment with faith? They're takin' it too seriously. These people don

  • May 6, 2005, 6:15 p.m. CST

    jedimaster@prodigy.net.mx

    by Plazola_MEX

    There u go!

  • May 6, 2005, 6:47 p.m. CST

    Star Trek, not Star Wars for me

    by zekmoe

    For me, I've always liked the Star Trek universe more. Better stories, more possibility. It just hasn't been all that strong lately. But the concept is better to my. I'm older though than the usual Star Wars fan. I like Star Wars, but Star Trek is my best sci--fi childhood memory.

  • May 6, 2005, 6:47 p.m. CST

    Freaky. Freaky people. Everywhere.

    by scrumdiddly

  • May 6, 2005, 6:55 p.m. CST

    BIG FUCKING END OF MOVIE SPOILER RIGHT HERE

    by Darth Philbin

    ONE OF PADME'S BABIES IS BOY NAMED LUKE AND HIS DAD IS ANAKIN AND TURNS INTO DARTH VADER MAKING DARTH VADER LUKE'S FATHER!!! NOW I HAVE SPOILED TWO STAR WARS MOVIES IN ONE POST. ROSEBUD = SLED.

  • May 6, 2005, 7:02 p.m. CST

    Hahahaha!!! No shit! You spoiled the whole saga!!

    by Plazola_MEX

    Wow i didn't know that......

  • May 6, 2005, 7:08 p.m. CST

    The reason for ROTJ's suckage

    by performingmonkey

    Lucas didn't, and probably still doesn't, like The Empire Strikes Back. It isn't coincidence that the movie Lucas had the least input on (Empire) is the best. He never wanted the movies to go dark or have actual depth. He just wanted to make 6 Saturday matinee serial movies for kids with bullshit cheesy dialogue and action. This is why ROTJ contained so much muppet and Ewok shit. He wanted to make up for the non-kid parts of ESB. He was on the rebound, so to speak. You better thank fuck that certain situations arose which meant the Luke/Vader/Emperor scenes turned out better than they would have done. Plus, McDiarmid is a class act. He's one of ROTJ's AND TPM's saving graces. Sadly, Christopher Lee as Dooku is underused, but at least he added SOMETHING to AOTC (that 'something' being the only credible performance). One large mistake Lucas has made is pandering to fanboys. Including Wookiees is OK for selling tickets, but what does it add in the long-run? In 10 years time people will be wondering why the fuck they were used. AND they'll be wondering why George made the universe even smaller by using Fett. TPM was the only one of the prequels where George set out to do something more original. Because people hated that he's now bowing to fanboys wishes.

  • Sith has a 100% rating over there right now. I do believe the hype. If you hate Star Wars sooo much that you feel the need to post on EVERY Star Wars talkback, get a fucking life already! I have NEVER posted on a talkback for a movie series that I didn't like. I ignored the last 2 Matrix talkbacks as well as all 3 Lord Of The Rings talkbacks. They were decent movies with little replay value. I have had a HARD time watching The Two Towers a second time as it was slooooow. Well made, but slow. For some reason I had better things to do than show up on these talkbacks and piss on other peoples movies. I guess I have better things to do (like work, Go to out to dinner with my wife play with my son, go shopping, burn cd's, watch the news, etc..)

  • May 6, 2005, 7:35 p.m. CST

    Why Luke doesn't remember Padme. . .

    by krullboy

    Luke was born head first, and his eyes were likely covered with material from the amniotic sack, thereby preventing him from seeing his mom. Leia, however, was born ass first (ie breech birth), and her first sight was of Padme's disfigured punani. When Leia said she thought her mom was sad, she really was just looking at the loose folds of flesh that were the results of Padme's epiziotomy (sp).

  • May 6, 2005, 8:14 p.m. CST

    Why do you people think that ROTS is the last Star Wars ever?

    by Sith Lord Sauron

    I find that idea increadibly naive. One day Lucas is going to shuffle off of this mortal coil and ascend to that big Jedi Base In the Sky. When that happens do you really think his estate (or whoever ends up owning the rights) will let the multibillion dollar cash cow that is Star Wars quietly wither away? Or will there be live action Clone Wars on the big screen plus Episodes 7, 8, 9, 10 & 11 based off of the Zahn books? Hmmmm, that's a toughie: dry-hump the cash cow or just leave it in peace. What do YOU they'll decide?

  • May 6, 2005, 8:15 p.m. CST

    SITH = LIBERALISM

    by Thunderballs

    Everyone knows that.

  • May 6, 2005, 8:15 p.m. CST

    I Saw: STARWARS: EPISODE III *** LUCAS REDEMES HIMSELF!!!

    by modelliga

    I Saw: STARWARS: EPISODE III *** LUCAS REDEMES HIMSELF!!! Movie Review (Don't worry, I will warn ahead of time before talking about spoilers): I SAW THE PRESS SCREENING OF STARWARS: EPISODE III, REVENGE OF THE SITH!!! LUCAS REDEMES HIMSELF!!! Where do I begin? Tears, yes, tears! I was balling my eyes out and so was everyone else in the theater, that is how freaking emotional this film was. Lucas nailed it!!! The security was insane!!! The movie, better than I ever expected! I had many problems with the first two episodes, but this 3rd one was breathtaking! I will give a review in a moment, again, Don't worry, I will warn ahead of time before talking about spoilers. So I bet you're wondering: "How the hell did this guy get into the world premiere press screening of Star Wars III?" So I am, lol. My friend calls me out of nowhere and leaves me the following voice message: "Dude, don't ask questions, don't check your email, get your jacket & just get out NOW, You have 5 minutes to get to the Zeigfeld theater (One of the largest and oldest in N.Y.) and I will get you into Star Wars III!" Me: "What the Fu$%!"

  • May 6, 2005, 8:23 p.m. CST

    thanks harry.

    by bluebottle

    awesome... just, awesome.

  • May 6, 2005, 8:48 p.m. CST

    So was it a masterpiece, or was it a master-piece?

    by Hung-Wei Lo

    Enquiring minds want to know.

  • May 6, 2005, 9:17 p.m. CST

    SuperShadow's Eps 7-9

    by JackBristow

    If these are legit, I will go to a gay bar and get gang-banged, then download kiddie porn on the net till the FBI knocks on my door. These are so full of shit. They SCREAM fanboy fan fiction, and anyone who gets duped by this needs to get their head examined.

  • May 6, 2005, 9:34 p.m. CST

    by fanshawe

    The man can write though. (And, hell, I'm an underground music journalist-with-an-office-day-job that reads fucking LITERATURE. And is obsessed by Spielberg movies.

  • May 6, 2005, 10:08 p.m. CST

    you didn

    by drumstick

    Does yoda fart or not?

  • May 6, 2005, 10:38 p.m. CST

    I have watched my last new STAR WARS film.

    by Lou C.

    Until George Lucas starts craving some more fat cash and decides to do three more movies. Fuck George Lucas. Fuck him up his stupid ass.

  • May 6, 2005, 11:13 p.m. CST

    CatoTheCensor...

    by lutz

    Remember the rumors after Ep. I came out that Palpatine would be a clone. hahhahahah

  • May 6, 2005, 11:23 p.m. CST

    Harry thinks he's deep with his pseudo political black ops musin

    by DoctorWho?

    Tell us all about your "feelings" and "touchy feely" reminiscings(sp?)...yet nothing about the blending of acting, sets,art direction, score, pacing etc. Waiting for Moriarty's review thankyou.

  • May 7, 2005, 12:11 a.m. CST

    Fucking A, Harry

    by joejedi

    I'm 35 years old and have lived with Star Wars for 28 years...from the beginning, the films, the kenner toys, the marvel comics and so on. Star Wars belongs to all of the fans but this was our generation's film first. It was kind of like our imprint, the stereotypical first thing the newborn sees type stuff, we were weened on it. I've been waiting most of my life for this film and I'm as depressed as I am excited...It's going to suck only being able to think of Star Wars as something on the shelf.

  • May 7, 2005, 12:19 a.m. CST

    And to all you unbelieving saps...

    by joejedi

    Also, how can any of you goddamned whiny pinheads have expected the first two prequels to have been anything other than what they were. For a guy who hasn't directed a film since nineteen seventy fucking seven, they rock pretty hard. Take a few steps back and look at the whole thing...how Phantom parallels A New Hope...How Empire and Clones jive. Lucas is giving you something cool here. Yeah Jar Jar's annoying, but I'll tell you what, my seven year old loves him. Phantom was a kids' movie...I could tell from the gitgo. This is Lucas the father of two making this stuff, post Young Indiana Jones Lucas, not Coppola's uppity assistant looking to kick some cosmic ass. I'm tired of listening to all you no talented pieces of shit complain. Make me a better movie and then open your sorry assed yaps.

  • What a brainless review for a retarded fat guy who never really made it out of his childhood... and it's the same guy who gave a good review to Godzilla! After all, I won't get to see that flick until rottentomatoes rates it at at least 75%! Spent enough money on Lucasfilm in the past years.

  • May 7, 2005, 12:28 a.m. CST

    God I really hate some of you Talkbackers.

    by Atomica

    For those of you who didn't empathize with Harry, go bitch about movies on some other site. This is the end of an Era. The Geek Swan Song if it were. And some people have the audacity to ruin this man's words with their pathetic attempts at humor? Fuck.

  • May 7, 2005, 12:44 a.m. CST

    Great Review Harry

    by docfalken

    I'm looking forward to seeing it even more now. I figured that it would be fun for my kids to join me (and they still will), but I think this will be more for me than them. I just hope there will be a film in their childhood that they can grow up with.

  • May 7, 2005, 12:53 a.m. CST

    Rove is the Dark Lord

    by Darth Kent

    A shame so much right-winger-in-denial is present here. Especially considering that Lucas himself leans left, i'd say The Empire coming forth from The Republic is a cautionary tale and warning that could represnt authoritarian America or Nazi Germany, ancient Rome, (1984's)Oceania or any other country that surrenders their freedoms out of pussy fear, authoritarianism, and dreams of Empire. If only they'd stop waving their flags for a second and actually listen. It sure makes more sense than saying EMPIRE=LIBERALS. As if liberals were ever ejecting people from "town halls" because they wore the wrong t-shirt or bumper sticker. And last I looked, it was the Emperor who was invading foreign worlds that did them no harm.

  • The truth hurts. Or in the words of Borat, "Wa Wa Weee Wa!!!".

  • Uh, last time I checked, Al Qaeda was based in Afghanistan. . .but to stay on topic, ROTS has a pretty favorable rating on Rottentomatoes, which should give people with a neutral agenda hope that ROTS will deliver. And Darth Kent, Nazi Germany never invaded the US, but I'm pretty sure defeating the Third Reich was a good idea, unless you are ForeverTJ.

  • May 7, 2005, 1:09 a.m. CST

    Leia remembers her FOSTER mother,

    by Warcraft

    Bail Organa's wife. They adopt Leia after Padme dies. At that point in ROTJ Leia doesn't know Anakin and Padme are her parents. Infact, Not even Luke knows who his mother is. He just knows Anakin is thier father, and let's Leia know. Obi Wan never mentions Padme, that's kinda fucked up, lol.

  • May 7, 2005, 1:17 a.m. CST

    Just watched Attack of the Clones again... An utterly terrible f

    by chickychow

  • May 7, 2005, 1:31 a.m. CST

    Just once meet expectation

    by Jack Burton

    That is all I'm asking George. I want this movie to rock so bad that I can taste it. The last 30 minutes of Clones kicked ass, as did the lightsaber bit in Menace. Aside from that..useless. Get this one right for the face of your father. get it right.

  • May 7, 2005, 1:35 a.m. CST

    Nice review...

    by Gluecifer

    not a real review, if I dare say, but very nice and moving (I'm not sarcastic there!).

  • May 7, 2005, 2:06 a.m. CST

    James Earl Jones

    by Riddi99

    Is he doing the voice of Darth Vadar in the sith movie? Please answer

  • May 7, 2005, 2:10 a.m. CST

    Anyone wanna take bets...........

    by Arcee-D2

    On how long it will take Harry to change his mind(after all the inevitable negative reviews come out from "real" critics), for him to suddenly change his mind and say this final episode sucked? Am I the only one that remembers his highly praise-worthy review of AOTC (which some LFL schumck supposedly snuck in his hotel room, via mission impossible)? As soon as the film was released, and all the negative reviews came out, Harry was whistling a different tune. Harry, I hope that the case isn't the same on this one.

  • May 7, 2005, 2:17 a.m. CST

    Riddi99, yes, THULSA DOOM is doing the voice of DARTH VADER

    by krullboy

  • May 7, 2005, 2:28 a.m. CST

    "Now they will no why they fear the night"

    by krullboy

    Thulsa Doom. BAMF.

  • May 7, 2005, 2:36 a.m. CST

    yep...

    by HillaryLovesMe

    This TB about a review of a sci-fi movie has now been infested with political debate. Congratulations, Harry. (I'm assuming this was intentional on your part, turning this TB into an off-topic circus. I'd be doubly embarrassed for you if this was not your intention.)

  • May 7, 2005, 2:37 a.m. CST

    krullboy, Ah...dude?

    by DaDeacon

    Japan did envade the US and was allied with germany so when we declared war on Japan we had to decalare war on the Germans as well!

  • May 7, 2005, 2:48 a.m. CST

    Got me a nifty Lightsaber Spoon outta my Frosted Flakes!

    by JethroBodine

    Fuck if I'm not convinced now that this movie is gonna be GOOD!

  • May 7, 2005, 2:59 a.m. CST

    Sounds a little like the Kevin Smith Review

    by WolfmanNards

    Smith brought up Starlog in his review (which came out first) because he ACTUALLY read it. I'm gonna have to guess that the guy who wrote it first is the guy who meant what he wrote.

  • May 7, 2005, 3:10 a.m. CST

    CONFESS

    by WolfmanNards

    Smith: Look, this is a movie I was genetically predisposed to love. I remember being eight years old, and reading in "Starlog" that Darth Vader became the half-man/half-machine he was following a duel with Ben Kenobi that climaxed with Vader falling into molten lava. Now, twenty six years later, I finally got to see that long-promised battled - and it lived up to any expectation I still held. I was sad to see the flick end, but happy to know it's not the end of the "Star Wars" universe entirely (I've read stuff about a TV show...). ..... Harry: Really don

  • May 7, 2005, 3:24 a.m. CST

    actually DaDeacon

    by skute7

    we declared war on the japanese then germany declared war on us. I don't know what this has to do with everything but I LOVED 10th grade history

  • May 7, 2005, 3:41 a.m. CST

    NEVER

    by The Librarian

    EVER BAD-MOUTH YODA. EVER.

  • May 7, 2005, 3:54 a.m. CST

    and another thing...

    by The Librarian

    anybody who posts anything negative about star wars or lucas- anyTHING- is an agent of the DARK SIDE who is attempting to lure you to the DARK SIDE as well. if you see any posts that disagree with me on this, ignore them as they are goddamn, shit-spreading DARK SIDE agents.

  • May 7, 2005, 3:55 a.m. CST

    The 2

    by Darth Maui

    George Lucas always said that Episode III would be dark, yet for some reason there are thousands of morons now who are like, "Omigosh! It looks like Episode III is going to be dark! What a surprise! Therefore George is either selling out to cynical fans and/or finally wising up!!! We like totally forget he always said it'd be that way." Stupid people can't remember anything that happened more than a year ago . . . unless it was a movie. Now in 2005 we still have eejits acting like armchair movie critics, "Dude, Episode 1 totally sucked. It like had Jar Jar and baby Anakin in it and stuff and that's like gag me with a forklift. I could totally make a better movie. Look at me, I like to keep talking about Episode I because I remember seeing it and I was like soooo disappointed and raped and stuff."

  • May 7, 2005, 4:32 a.m. CST

    Skute7

    by krullboy

    Thanks for saving me writing a profanity-laced post to the moron that does no know history, which is doubly ironic considering that we just celebrated the 60th anniversary to VE Day. (Oh by the way, VE stands for Victory in Europe, for those that failed to pay attention in 2nd grade)

  • May 7, 2005, 5:52 a.m. CST

    viola123

    by johnnyfartpants

    I suspect you may have lost an "it" in your original sentence. That is all.

  • May 7, 2005, 6:02 a.m. CST

    Harry also liked ATOC, so figure...

    by atomica2005

    I didn't expect anything less from Harry. I watched Phantom and ATOC again a couple of days ago and I can't believe how bad those movies are!

  • May 7, 2005, 6:23 a.m. CST

    ATOC was pretty cool

    by CuervoJones

    And Episode I was better than any Michael Gay

  • May 7, 2005, 7:17 a.m. CST

    Karl Rove

    by Deagle2

    Your comment about Karl Rove and Palpatine was pathetic. Apparently your knowledge of politics doesn't extend much farther than bumper stickers and soundbites. Unlike politics, your knowledge of film is pretty extensive. Stick to what you know and you will save yourself a lot of embarassment.

  • I Saw: STARWARS: EPISODE III *** LUCAS REDEMES HIMSELF!!! Movie Review (Don't worry, I will warn ahead of time before talking about spoilers): I SAW THE PRESS SCREENING OF STARWARS: EPISODE III, REVENGE OF THE SITH!!! LUCAS REDEMES HIMSELF!!! Where do I begin? Tears, yes, tears! I was balling my eyes out and so was everyone else in the theater, that is how freaking emotional this film was. Lucas nailed it!!! The security was insane!!! The movie, better than I ever expected! I had many problems with the first two episodes, but this 3rd one was breathtaking! I will give a review in a moment, again, Don't worry, I will warn ahead of time before talking about spoilers. So I bet you're wondering: "How the hell did this guy get into the world premiere press screening of Star Wars III?" So I am, lol. My friend calls me out of nowhere and leaves me the following voice message: "Dude, don't ask questions, don't check your email, get your jacket & just get out NOW, You have 5 minutes to get to the Zeigfeld theater (One of the largest and oldest in N.Y.) and I will get you into Star Wars III!" Me: "What the Fu$%!"

  • May 7, 2005, 8:25 a.m. CST

    I've never seen so many sad sacks gathered in one place.

    by TheJ0ker

    You know who you fucking are bitches! Harry great review. From the heart, a unique perspective. I wish this talk back had indents and line breaks.

  • May 7, 2005, 8:51 a.m. CST

    i love you, Harry, 'cos you ARE a geek!

    by ikkyu

    me, i'm 33 too, and i feel the same way you do. part of me thinks "damn, he actually cried at a goddamn Star Wars movie", but the better part of me's hoping i do too. if it rocks, and if i also find myself crying, then i too am a geek and i'm happy and proud of it.

  • May 7, 2005, 9:57 a.m. CST

    Questions...........

    by Knucklehead

    What exactly is the difference between a "Dark Jedi" and a "Sith"? How can a civilization master light speed travel but not have an ultrasound to tell a woman she is having twins? How can a couple of "Sith Lords" not sense two kids, but they can "forsee" so much else? Can't a guy "sense" two kids when he's right next to his wife? I mean he can "sense a presence he hasn't felt since....." but he can't sense two heartbeats through Portman's belly? (side note: who's hotter, Fisher in Ep6 or Portman in Ep2. WRONG. Fisher in Ep2!) AND isn't sending a kid named SKYWALKER into a sort of interstellar witness protection program on the home planet of the guy who wants to kill him AND leaving him with that guy's same last name AND leaving him with the guys half brother kind of like sending Fredo Corleone to live in the guest house of the Corleone compound in Tahoe, with a big FREDO mailbox out front, so as to hide him from Michael so Michael won't have him whacked? AND why didn't Big Ben finish the job? I mean , you slice of limbs, why not the head too? AND if they all "have a bad feeling about this", why do they always do it? AND why is it that they went to the trouble to have McGregor look like a young Guiness, but Christensen look nothing like Shaw? Yeah I know he got burned blah blah blah, but come on!!! Did getting burned give him that english accent? AND wouldn't it be sweet if the next Star Wars movie was a "Muppet reimagining" like ABC is doing with the "Wizard of OZ" but Yoda the only Human and was played by Shaq? They could hold up all of the different light sabers (blue, green ,red, orange, purple) and sing "Rainbow Connection". La da da dee da da dum. Oh yeah, and regarding the comment about an Empire only lasting 20 years.... There was an empire in Europe back in the 30s and 40s and didn't last 20 years but still managed to do a helluva lot fo damage. And finally, inspite of it all, I still think watching any LOTR movies is like watching new paint dry on a cool, cloudy , humid day. They are soooooo boring. I'll take "I'll try spinning" over endless shots of a doe eyed little person any day.

  • May 7, 2005, 10:10 a.m. CST

    I meant Fisher in 5

    by Knucklehead

    It's all too confusing. DOH!!

  • May 7, 2005, 10:32 a.m. CST

    HEY, YOU! SITTING THERE IN YOUR UNDEROOS... WAKE UP!

    by Devil'sOwn

    Hooboy- relax, can't really see what ya'all are wearing (thank God!). I've watched this tb fester for a while and, to be fair, everyone (even "haters") makes valid points. However, I wish I could say I was surprised that a lot of emotions come into play here. Consequently, this seems to obscure a few little details. I can't begin to guess what some folks expect, but my understanding is this is an ENTERTAINMENT news n' reviews site, and Harry, see, is a full- on fan of genre entertainment ( a "geek", if you must), first and foremost. Now, I've always taken Star Wars for what it is. In a world of things that need to be closely scrutinized, it's just a big, fun story told for the sake of adventure, and I like all aspects of the story and feel it's fucking stupid to rant about the prequels like your sister got the shits at her big wedding ceremony. These films have a rich legacy and, sure, everything about them isn't as resonant as the OT, but that's really not much of a reason to, say, become some welfare Leonard Maltin and dismiss the series and curse the name of Lucas and all his descendants. It ain't "cool". A friendly suggestion: The next weepy- bitch chick flick, artsy- fartsy Rorshach blot comedy, or creepy- ass biopic is on the way, so hang in there, you cinematic gods...

  • May 7, 2005, 10:47 a.m. CST

    DevilsOwn----Exaaaactly right!

    by JohnnyTremaine

    Star Wars is meant to be taken only as a fun, slightly goofy, space-opera, gee-whiz adventure story. No deep meanings or messianic messages are contained. But from Harry's review, ROTS sounds more like a SOAP opera than a SPACE opera: Dawson's Creek meets Days of Our Lives in space.

  • May 7, 2005, 11:07 a.m. CST

    and now we also get to watch the fascists squirm and bitch becau

    by atomheartbrother

    yes folks, free will is a bitch- having to make your decisions and having to live with them. but then sometimes movements or parties come along, and if their talk is sweet to your ears and they provide those easy answers, hell- they tell you what you should do and what you should believe; wa-la, you're life becomes a little easier (or that's what they imply will happen). and of course then you're fucked (or not, you might like it) because that's the classic trap of fascism and it's the trap anakin skywalker fell into; thus if some folks feel that ROTS is an anti bush slam that's their problem, not lucas' or mine for that matter.

  • just a geeky thought. Leia is only a few days/weeks old when Padme dies? I don't know yet, maybe she dies very shortly after giving Birth.

  • May 7, 2005, 11:17 a.m. CST

    What's going on with Jake Lloyd?

    by Trevor Goodchild

    Why's he bitter?

  • May 7, 2005, 11:40 a.m. CST

    Here's my review

    by retrocrush

    http://www.retrocrush.com/archive2005/episode3/index.html

  • May 7, 2005, 11:59 a.m. CST

    Yup. It was pretty much a given there would be melodrama.

    by Devil'sOwn

    And, yeah, I do concede Anakin's hissy fits could be a bit much. Most of all, though, I agree that the prequels suffer from the lack of a roguish anti- hero for us misfits not into the pure, paladin Jedi mindset.

  • May 7, 2005, 12:16 p.m. CST

    Is this, then, the end of our boy Harry?

    by Devil'sOwn

    I'm curious as to how some of these crackheads even found there way here. I'm relatively certain AICN wasn't made strictly for the purpose of covering Star Wars, or any other franchise film, for that matter. How fuckin' desperate is that?! Furthermore, if you hate this stuff so much, why would you even trouble yourselves with speculating about sequels, by other directors?

  • May 7, 2005, 12:50 p.m. CST

    The Question REALLY Is: How Many Of Lucas' Chins Make it Into Ep

    by hipcheck13

    ...Harry, you used "shit" to the nth degree in that review. Anyhoo, it read pretty heartfelt. Yes, I'll be there when it opens. For me? I first saw Star Wars at the Cinedome opening week; I was in 10th grade. My buddies Bob Case, Matt Gayler and I actually HID in the theater to see it twice in a row--no kidding. It was an amazing day. Now, Lucas has truly eff'd up the series with his endless tinkering and his listless "prequels." However, he's created a lexicon for my generation, and that's something no one can deny--like the guy or not.

  • May 7, 2005, 12:50 p.m. CST

    To all fellow posters-

    by Devil'sOwn

    Thanks for bearing with my observations. I try not to ramble. And to those I may have offended, let me put in in perspective for ya: We're all (hopefully) grown-ass people (and to those pissants who think they're clever, the teacher sits you at the front of the class to keep you from groping Sally Jo Rottencrotch, not because you're a gifted pupil) discussing (under absurd assumed names)movies that aren't meant to alter your life, just provide you with a few hours of much needed diversion. Peace.

  • May 7, 2005, 1:29 p.m. CST

    No, I think the question REALLY is...

    by masterchappy

    How far can Harry crawl up George's hack ass? Try writing a review next time instead a gushing mess of jerk-off nonsense. Jesus.

  • May 7, 2005, 1:30 p.m. CST

    by Uncle Bubba

    I don't understand why most of you bother writing in this talkback. Some of you seem to resent when Harry injects his personal political beliefs into his "reviews." If you are conservative why do you come to this site? Go find a conservative who runs a movie website and clog up that one. Or you can do like Harry and create your own site. Many of you openly criticize The Phantom Menace and Attack of the Clones and thus assume that Revenge of the Sith will not live up to your expectations. You vow to not see it so as to not give George Lucas your money. OK that's fine but why must you clog up Harry's site with your pessimism? Do you really think by posting juvenile negative comments about Harry, the films and George Lucas that you will convince others to not see Revenge of the Sith? Above there are many comments about Harry not posting a "real review." How often do you guys come to this site? Shouldn't you know by now what Harry's writing style is? He writes from the first person point of view about his experiences leading up to, during and after the film in question. Are you really basing your decision to see Revenge of the Sith on Harry's "review"? George Lucas is worth $3 billion as of September 2004. He doesn't need to work for the rest of his life. To write that he is only creating the sequels for the money is rather naive. Just because Harry provides you with a megaphone to commincate with each other doesn't mean many of you should do so. If you don't like the prequels, fine. But do us all a favor and shut up, leave those who do alone and get a life. If you don't like Harry's politics or his "reviews" then please just go away.

  • May 7, 2005, 2:38 p.m. CST

    Why it took eighteen years to build the Death Star

    by TimBenzedrine

    George Lucus carefully spells it all out in this scene that was ultimately cut from the final print-- A conversation between two space contractors-- "Eight- teen years?" "Well, we could have this baby up and running in ten years but we've got a lot of special parts on order." "like what? Well, OSSHA (the Outer Space Safety and Health Agency) requires that all tractor beams be installed with an easily accessable killswitch and be clearly marked "tractor beam" so it can be found and disabled in case of an emergency. Don't get me started on the garbage shutes, they're making us reroute them all through the prison complex." "Wouldn't it make more sense to have them near the kitchens or by the loading bay? Do you want to argue with the emperor over his designs? Just getting all the permits signed has been a burocratic nightmare. People ask a lot of questions when you show up with a bunch of blueprints clearly marked "Death Star Project" I know I suggested they change the name to something more positive like the "Clear Space Inititive" or "No Planet Left Behind" but the emperor's holding firm to his "vision". "Do we really need a trench running all along the center of the space station? And does it have to lead directly to the main reactor?" "That's another safety modification- the trench is there to protect the core from from possible damage from space debris." "Yeah, but what if a small object, say a fighter jet, accidently strays into the trench and fires a blaster too close to the opening, wouldn't the resulting chain reaction blow the entire ship apart?" "Well, now you're just talking crazy talk."

  • May 7, 2005, 2:51 p.m. CST

    Twisted

    by fxmulder35

    All of you fanboys are twisted. Guess I'm twisted for reading your drivel. Can't believe there isn't anything better to do on a Saturday afternoon than this. At least if SITH was here...I could be in the theater.

  • God I hope not. Only a real loser would.

  • May 7, 2005, 5:36 p.m. CST

    People just read talkback post to find a reason to get pissed

    by Orionsangels

    Then you can't wait to respond and see if you owned anyone.

  • May 7, 2005, 6:23 p.m. CST

    PlasmaOrb... Get a Clue

    by Damer1

    And shove your politics talk.

  • May 7, 2005, 6:59 p.m. CST

    This movie is gonna suck.

    by thespius19

    Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. Lucas isn't gonna fool me a third time. This turd ain't floatin' in my toilet and I'm not sullying up my DVD collection with it either. Sure...the blinded fanboys will dance the circle of joy, but real movie enthusiasts, like me, will know that if something smells like crap, feels like crap and looks like crap...it must be crap. I'll pass.

  • May 7, 2005, 8:41 p.m. CST

    Thespius19: "but real movie enthusiasts, like me..."

    by Triumph poops!

    Or simply put another way, real movie enthusiasts, like you, don't know shit about REAL movies. Or clearly don't have any taste and most certainly don't possess the ability to simply stop sounding like an overly pompous troll. For fuck's sake it's just a summer big screen popcorn movie. Go and enjoy. Then when you get home you can bury the rotting carcas that was the kid in you since it clearly died ages ago and is now smelling up the place.

  • May 7, 2005, 8:44 p.m. CST

    And the AICN Award for Talkback DICK of the thread goes to IceCu

    by Triumph poops!

    Nice job screwing up the Talkback, moron.

  • May 7, 2005, 9:01 p.m. CST

    Triumph poops!

    by thespius19

    Yet another post from a representative of the lowest common denominator. I actually get paid for my expertise in the field and have seen parts of this film. It's crap. The kid in me is still alive. He still enjoys Sin City. Still cries at Big Fish. Still reconizes the masterpiece of LOTR. Still can tell crap when it's shoveled before a blinded fanboy audience who'll buy anything with the S.W. label, especially another empty tent pole. Hollywood's respect for the franchise is demonstrated by how packed the weekends around SW3's release are with other tent poles. Crap. Enjoy.

  • May 7, 2005, 9:04 p.m. CST

    What really sucks?

    by Devil'sOwn

    "Real movie enthusiasts" who come here to use the same tired old scatalogical zingers and valiantly struggle to show us how wise they are. I would ask, "Howzabout ya go and see the movie first before vehemently denouncing it, Sparky?" But nah, sounds like ya got a precognitive leg up on "the blinded fanboys"... Y'know, with all your foresight, it's SAD that you still take time out of your clearly full schedules to throw your nuggets about. Look kids, let's be real here; I know it's no indicator of quality, but this puppy's gonna do mad business (just as, conversely, some of the really best movies hardly make enough receipts to justify their making). Regardless of what you, or any other ringtailed fairies say, I assert: A whole helluva lotta people are gonna go see Episode III, and I ain't no gambler. This isn't just another summmer popcorn blockbuster, ACCEPT it. Make no mistake: In this instance, I'm pretty sure Harry knows of what he speaks. And if he says the shit rocks, then I'm inclined to believe him. So the first two didn't blow your dress up? Fine. Save yer tip money from The Crank Shaft. Don't have your boyfriend take you to see it, and fer heaven's sake, don't "sully up" your DVD collection. Ya prob'ly need that cash for the clinic.

  • May 7, 2005, 9:15 p.m. CST

    IceCubah...Foolio

    by WONKABAR

    Clearly, retardation is a terrible reality

  • May 7, 2005, 9:23 p.m. CST

    Triumph poops!

    by thespius19

    Right. Because I must be GAY if I don't like Star Wars Ep. 3. Suffice it to say, "You just don't get it!" is the rallying cry of fanboys the world over. Don't care how much money it makes. Wild Wild West made money too. Still sucked. And I've seen parts of it. Same problems as the first two haven't been fixed. You guys actually have convinced yourselves that "the whole world is wrong...us few GET IT!" Well...congrats. You now have the religious fervor of Al Quaeda for Star Wars. You must be proud. It still doesn't change the fact that this very lucrative movie will stink up the cineplex. Bad movie making at its finest.

  • May 7, 2005, 9:58 p.m. CST

    Heh, RETURN OF THE JIHAD!

    by WONKABAR

    We will crush the ghey infidel. The evil-doing haterz will kneel before the prophet-Lucas or die!

  • May 7, 2005, 10:08 p.m. CST

    It's Just a Movie

    by flossygomez

    why don't some of you dvd and movie dorks read a book once in a while, make a good writer rich for a change.

  • May 7, 2005, 10:42 p.m. CST

    Clearly...

    by WONKABAR

    retardation is STILL a terrible reality

  • May 8, 2005, 12:53 a.m. CST

    Star Wars, Ave Atque Vale

    by Clio

    I gotta be at least twice as old as most of you here. Sigh. I was 27 when I saw Star Wars on opening day at the NorthPark Cinema in Dallas, one of the largest theaters in the country at the time. And Lucas even came there to personally supervise its new sound system. The following day I took my four-year-old son, and he has not missed an opening day since. He and I have 28 years of great shared memories of this magical series---and that's the best part of it for me. http://www.dsmithworld.net/IraqWar.html

  • May 8, 2005, 1:34 a.m. CST

    Hey Triumph

    by Sicuv Uyall

    I don't know, but my inner child was bored to shit during the last 2 movies. Maybe cuz they sucked. What do you think, Triumph? Never mind. Shut up.

  • May 8, 2005, 1:42 a.m. CST

    I wish it wasn't still another 10 days until ROTS opens.

    by ExcaliburFfolkes

    It can't get here soon enough as far I'm concerned. I'm dying to see how it all wraps up and fits in with the original "Star Wars".

  • Look; Nobody who liked (not "loved," not

  • May 8, 2005, 2:47 a.m. CST

    I'm Sorry, Techtite...

    by thespius19

    But Empire would be regarded as a good movie...EVEN IF it was released today. All those things you ATTEMPTED to nitpick would not even be noticed. You're stretching IMHO. The biggest problem is you have to NITPICK SW and ESB but TPM and AOC make it all too easy to see the flaws. In fact...you can't miss them. Heck...I honestly cannot even WATCH AOC all the way through. It's that bad.

  • May 8, 2005, 2:52 a.m. CST

    Reviews

    by Darth Melkor

    So far Newsweek, Time, Hollywood Reporter and Variety have all given the film great reviews. You can't get much bigger and better than that. I'm definitely not a fanboy, but that's pretty convincing to me that it's pretty damn good.

  • May 8, 2005, 3:37 a.m. CST

    AKA Azlam Orlandu and I've been watching you all...

    by Thayden Ozma

    I've been visiting these talkbacks for years and I even used to post here. But due to the constant bullshit blathered about I decided to stop wasting my time arguing with all of you who insist on wasting your time bashing Star Wars when the reality is that Star Wars fans who defend the perquels will not bend in their taste against the comments of those so insistant upon hating Lucas and vice-versa. I decided to begin posting here again in the light of the upcomming relese just to say one thing. I stumbled across this site in the months prior to Episode 1s release and have visited almost everyday ever since. I happen to be a proponent of Lucas because I go to the movies to enjoy myself, nothing more. While the prequels are lacking in certain qualities, they're the only thing I've truly enjoyed out of cinema in the past 20 years save for Spiderman and the Incredibles. Now with Episode 3 on the horizon my expectations have been significantly grounded, in turn I fully expect to enjoy the film. But after Harry's review I realized that this film is going to hit me in a way I never expected and no matter how good the acting is I'm going to walk out of the theater different than I did when I went in. Strangely enough I completely relate with Harry when he said that he didn't want Anakin to turn to the darkside by the end of the film, when in turn isn't that why we all wanted Lucas to make these films? After the Clone Wars cartoon, Labyrinth of Evil and settling in with the past 2 prequels I have grown very attached to Anakin, he is in fact the only real human character in these films for he is flawed. I am now almost fearful to see Episode 3 because like Harry said I'm not going to clap and cheer at the end. For the first time in my life Star Wars will be over and I'll never have to deal with this lot of perpetually whiny sub-humans who really need to get a hobby or a day job again. Goodbye all. I'm sure you'll have some wonderful rebuke to my statements, but the reality is that I have a great job, a girl, a kick-ass PC, a nice car, no problem with dealing with people, I love Star Wars and George Lucas, I think Harry is a great guy for hosting this site while putting up with all the childish bullshit and there has been nothing you fucks have said in the past 5 years that have changed my mind about any of it. See you in hell you crotch-gobblers, the whole lot of you. Maybe someday you'll realize just how good you have it and find something relevant to discuss or champion besides someone elses hard work. Because one thing is for sure, if all of you spent the time you have here trying to display your distaste for Lucas and applied it to an example of how to do it better you might have something to show for it and you just might grow some appreciation for how hard the man has worked all these years. He owes you dick. -Az

  • May 8, 2005, 4:19 a.m. CST

    Erm, nice, but.....DOCTOR WHO is back on TV!!!

    by Fugazi32

    The Daleks are back!!!!!!!!!

  • May 8, 2005, 5:38 a.m. CST

    "See you in hell you crotch-gobblers" and farewell to AICN

    by krullboy

    First off, great line by ThaydenOzma. Second, I agree with a lot of the posts that say that AICN's days may be numbered. Like many other people, I visited this site from the get go in order to get info on the prequels. I think that sites such as "kongisking" and the "bluetights" superman site may be the new trend. Also, now that SW is over, I can think of no other film project/franchise that instills so much fervor, passion, and hate as SW, as evidenced by the lengthy TB posts and TB volume. What is on the horizon in this genre that will pique massive fanboy interest to LOTR/SW levels? Narnia? Harry Potter? Kong? Spiderman? NO. They all have strong followings, but nothing like what we are currently witnessing. In short, enjoy all the hate and vitriol in these TBs, the inflammatory posts of ForeverTJ, the brutally honesty of DocPazazu, the Bullshit of MinasTirithII (who is still absent), the insanity of Cocolopez, the LSD-enhanced posts of ChickenGeorge7th, and the UK-spiked humor of BanthafodderUK and CptKirks2Pay, because it is all quickly coming to an end. Harry was right. It is an end of an era, and unfortunately for AICN, it may be the end of their era as well.

  • Is this BS? Has anyone heard this?

  • May 8, 2005, 6:32 a.m. CST

    Crotch-Gobblers Pt. II

    by Thayden Ozma

    I have yet to truly put the nail in my coffin with this site, but I do assure you that the days reading others opinions on Star Wars are over. AICN is a great site still in my opinion. I'm sure I'd miss a great scoop on random projectx now and then if I were truly to delete it out of my favorites. I do also recognize that TBs are a forum to express your opinion and all opinions are valid. I'm just sick of people stating how much Star Wars sucks in such a childish and hateful way, when in fact they are acting much more offensive and juvenille than anything Lucas puts on the screen, kinda hypocritical if you ask me. I also think that Harry is a great guy with a good heart, I tend to agree with him on many things. He may eggagerate his appreciation for some films, and yes he's fat (which he freely admits, and if you still insist on exploiting a persons "flaw" even after they have clearly established their awareness, then you're just about as worthless to society as what'll be flushed in my next bathroom visit) but I highly doubt that the lot of you nameless freaks all look like Jude Law with the writing skills of Tolkien and the analytical filmmaking skills of Spielberg. Realistically all of you are people old enough to appreciate Star Wars or else you wouldn't feel so strongly about it, you're probably educated even though your actions here are not indicitive of it, because uneducated folk seldom troll forums or care so strongly about the films. But none of you are the goldenboys who sport enough talent to close the book on any opinion, you can't be, or else you'd be too damn busy to waste your time here. Cut Harry a break for fucks sake. People getting outraged by his actions need to step back and take a good look at just what they're saying. If you don't like his reviews then don't come here, or at least realize that he's only the owner of a website, not a politician cutting funding to your childrens school lunch program. Some of the cruel things people say about Harry and his site make me wonder "Just how much power does this guy wield? And how have I after 5 years of visiting this site missed out on the fact that Harry's day job is really that of Overlord of Moviemaking?" For real folks, lets get a fucking grip here. I would also like to say that it's obvious that not all of you are crotch-gobblers, just a vast amount. Harry Knowles rules! If you disagree then consider the fact that if it wasn't for him none of you would have this forum to come to and bitch about things that really amount to shit. It's like getting a free ride from someone and then telling them their car is a piece of shit. I for one come to forums to bounce ideas off of others who share the same interests in me, not to start fights, tell others they're wrong, or just be generally hateful. Some people will never be satisfied until others share their view to the point where they become negative immature assholes because stating their point at a civilized level didn't work. Now their reduced to the same cynical mindset that is unfortunately the status-quo in our modern world. Alas we all have our agenda. I may not agree with the Star Wars bashers out there, but I don't give a damn what others think of me and I never have. I'm in fact proud of the fact that I stuck to my guns even back when Phantom was released. I always said "It's impossible to judge this story until you see the entire trilogy. Trust me Lucas has a plan." Hmmm...is it just me or are the early reviews of this film overwhealmingly positive? At least by percentile they are vastly in comparison when compared to the last 2 prequels. And trust me, I've been along for this ride the whole time. I know. I hear an "I told you so." coming, alas I won't be so snide. It's contrast folks, understand it and embrace it. In order for the darkness and tragedy of Sith to be fully appreciated you have to see just how happy, good and colorful things were in Phantom. Quite simple if you ask me. Enjoy yourselves on May 19. I sure as hell will. And I guarantee you not once while watching the film will I say, "Oh man, cUstarsLastChickenDocMan65 was right when they said that Lucas takes it in the pooper. I should have listened to that faceless entity on the internet's point of view because I can't come to my own opinions." Bottom line is that even if everyone agreed with you about Star Wars, you'd still hate yourselves, because therein really lies the problem doesn't it? Nobody goes around telling people that what they like is stupid and they should like it unless there's something wrong. Otherwise you'd all take the opinions of others into logical consideration and be out focusing on the things you do like, like healthy-minded folks with good character do. No it's not the end of Aint it Cool news, it's the beginning of the end of me having my favorite franchise ripped apart by people who have no respect for the hard work of others. Spite the fact that Lucas may have not made the prequels the way you like, you owe him some respect for at least entertaining your worthless asses for the 2 hours of Empire that all of you seem to unanimously deem untouchable. Those 2 hours were more than most people on this Earth do for you, hell it's probably 2 hours more than your parents paid attention to you. Judging only by the manner of your conduct of course. How so many people can enjoy the sublties and sophistication of such films as LotR and still come here and act the way they do is beyond me. It's like being raised in high society and speaking like a homeless drunk. Fucking schitzos! Please pardon the length of my post, but I haven't posted here in a long time and here I spill my opinion that has been building for a long time. I apologize to all of you who are decent folk for having to endure it and to the rest of you I apologize that you that it takes longer to scroll down now during your trollings. Until the next time that logic, reasoning and the golden rule are nowhere to be found. -Az

  • May 8, 2005, 8:44 a.m. CST

    So what you're saying is...

    by Rhett Butler

    Now you can retire? The journey is over? Hello? Job half done! Regarding the; 'I learnt of the source material George was smashing and grabbing from

  • May 8, 2005, 8:44 a.m. CST

    supershadow is a crock of shit

    by neilster66

    if you have any doubts about if it's real read this "Harrison has never told me one way or the other that he would return as Han Solo for the sequels. I expect he would because his film career is in steep decline. He is no longer getting the top acting jobs so I would be doing him a favor by creating new films with Han Solo" that is according to supershadow a real quote from george lucas........as if lucas would say such a thing about ford.....the site is such a phoney

  • May 8, 2005, 9:22 a.m. CST

    Thayden Ozma

    by DocPazuzu

    Excellent posts.

  • May 8, 2005, 9:52 a.m. CST

    Hey Towelie...

    by DocPazuzu

    ...why don't you head on back to that hilariously pathetic website frequented by you and your fellow coprophageous vermin instead of humping our shins over here? Have you ever stopped and taken a good look at yourself and your buddies on that site? You weep about AICN's "original mandate" yet the sole purpose of your own little clique of malodorous troglodytes and your website is to malign AICN and CHUD. Let me repeat that: your sole online raison d'être is to TRASH OTHER WEBSITES. Frankly, that makes you guys the absolute bottom feeders of internet nerdism, even below furry porn fans. You can cry in your cornflakes like a whiny little bitch as much as you like, but go sit somewhere else - this is a non-bib table.

  • May 8, 2005, 12:18 p.m. CST

    The only point of your post, Towelie...

    by DocPazuzu

    ...whether intentional or not, was to show what utter tools you and your cretinous compadres are. You people repeatedly hide behind "freedom of speech" when confronted with the fact that your site is rife with racist rants and other contemptable swill which very early on obscured any lazy point you may have had. You are in no position to criticize anyone with any kind of weight behind your words. The funniest thing about your post is how you mention hits on your site as if that were some sort of badge of quality for your pig sty. Furthermore, as far as I recall, I voiced my contempt for the servicemen (and women) who engaged in the torture of prisoners. You really need to try to keep abreast of things when veering madly off-topic like that.

  • May 8, 2005, 1:30 p.m. CST

    The difference, Towelie...

    by DocPazuzu

    ...is that anchorite's myopic post will be deleted when attention is brought to it. As for addressing your point, most people who frequent AICN have bones to pick with either Harry or any of the other folks behind the site. What's so controversial about that? You can scream "sell out" all you want, but in the end it all comes down to interpretations you create based on things posted or omitted on the site. You're not even requesting that Harry remain neutral -- you want him to embody all of YOUR particular values when it comes to film. It's his site and he can do whatever he wants with it, the same way you can devote all the energy you do to bitch about it, but don't pretend for one instant that you're some sort of moral authority who has everyone's best interest at heart and carrying on like a fucking bargain basement Geraldo Rivera in the midst of uncovering the scandal of the decade. Furthermore, your one-dimensional perception of the war and your idiotic labeling of it as "racist" truly shows how feeble your reasoning skills are. There are plenty of things about the war to get pissed off about, but resorting to inanities like that doesn't help your side at all. I personally have huge problems with the war, but certainly wouldn't be caught dead with na

  • May 8, 2005, 1:39 p.m. CST

    What about Frodo?

    by MeOfCourse77

    What happens to Frodo and Sam...and Capt'n Kirk...um, never mind.

  • May 8, 2005, 2:16 p.m. CST

    GEEKSTORM: The Revenge of the SW Talkback

    by Devil'sOwn

    {sniffsniff} You smell that? The pungent odour of model glue, stale junk food an' unwashed Punisher t- shirts. Y'hear that? The intermittent nasal whines and staccato clicketyclack! of keyboards. Feel it?! The cold, clammy, GASSY waves of discontent. Dear Lord, It's coming... The GEEKSTORM!! And there is no escape (unless, ofcourse, you turn off your PC). Aaauuaggh! The forces of cool, well- structured logic and fevered, twisted delusions shall clash in a no-holds-barred struggle for, uuuhmmm, domination? Honestly, some of you come here seeming for all the world like "Look at me! I'm a pretetious arsehole!! I can talk shit about a pop culture phenomenon like it's my holy crusade, and toss off bitchy quips." Then, when someone invariably calls you out, you (who were employing fecal matter euphemisms) have the absolute stones to say a) They are appealing to the "lowest common denominator (a battle- cry of the pathetically desperate culture- vulture if ever there was one) and b) Those who disagree with you are cretins, little better than terrorists! Way to make a fuckin' point. By way of explanation, I don't think yer "mmmgay" if you have a healthy dislike for Lucas' sagas. I just feel you... are... A SOULESS ABOMINATION THAT THE HEAVENS CRY OUT MUST BE DESTROYED!!! I kid. Seriously, exercise your right to free expression, but think, dammit. Search your feelings... If you truly believe this site is a has- been, Harry is an addle- brained fool of a king with no clothes, George Lucas is the dreaded, insideous enemy of all cinematic creativity, and Star Wars, the prequels in particular, epitomizes everything that is wrong with the entertainment industry, then MAYBE your enrgies would better devoted elsewhere, a'ight?

  • May 8, 2005, 4:47 p.m. CST

    Welp, I already saw Revenge of the Sith...

    by stlfilmwire

    And regardless of what negative stuff you guys are anticipating, I still must stand by my words. Hayden gives a solid performance, Ian McDiarmid kicks ass in this, and the average Star Wars fan will have a blast. My only beef is that the action is a little too busy -- with too much going on in a scene at once.

  • May 8, 2005, 4:53 p.m. CST

    Towelie, you are an idiot.

    by FluffyUnbound

    "Sites like AICN become part of the system they were set up to counter after they get in bed with the studios"? Are you serious? What kind of fucking retard are you? How is it remotely possible for you to believe that AICN was in any way, shape or form "set up" to do anything like "counter" the studios? Like it was some sort of revolutionary act or something, that Harry has betrayed by "selling out" or some other asinine concept you've invented in your mind, and you are gloriously preventing Harry's counterrevolutionary backsliding? What an absurd tool you are. AICN was set up so Harry could talk about movies and publish movie news. It wasn't an anti-studio act or a pro-studio act or an "underground journalism" act or anything else you want to inflate it to be. Harry wanted to have a movie website and he would publish news if it came his way. Period. Nothing about that constitutes a "mission" he can betray by getting "too close to the studios". Don't you have some community theatre you can go join and try to run by Brechtian principles or something, instead of wasting your time here, you ass?

  • May 8, 2005, 5:15 p.m. CST

    LOTR TURNED MY BEST FRIEND GAY

    by Darth Philbin

    It is true. After 10 hours of grown men crying and holding each other and riding horseback together he just cracked. Not that being gay is a bad thing but I thought I would warn fellow talkbackers just in case they have a roommate that likes these movies. You never know when the One Ring that your buddy keeps going on and on about might turn out to be your Brown Ring. In any case, I will be taking him to see SW III because I am hoping it will get him mind off cock. I will post my results...

  • May 8, 2005, 5:37 p.m. CST

    At last A Review From A Solid Source

    by Darth Hidious

    At last - A Review that was worth reading!!! Now Thats what a I'm talkin about. All you wannabe critics can complain about the dialog, the overacting and the so called unanswered questions but the truth is that you other arseheads are talkin bollocks and haven't a clue what its all about. THANK YOU HARRY - YOUR A STAR!!!

  • May 8, 2005, 7:25 p.m. CST

    clips in new star wars game

    by natedalli

    does anyone know if some of the actual footage from the Ep.III game was shot just for the game..cuz ( spoiler) it shows Anakin after Killing MAce Windu...and he says "what have i done" it makes it seem like anakin actually kills Mace...but i thought it was suppose to be Palpatine/Sidious that kills Mace??..can anyone make sense of this?

  • May 8, 2005, 7:57 p.m. CST

    Whatever douchebag.

    by FluffyUnbound

    In your earlier post you talk about the site having a "mandate". You also lament the fact that the site has [in your view] turned its back on its pirate history. You also complain that the site no longer has enough unofficial photos or leaks to suit you. Your implication - since you also claim that the site has lost its independence - is that Harry is no longer willing to engage in piracy or post unofficial photos or leaks because he is too close to the studios. [Despite the almost savage series of leaks against the script and against a series of directors during the pre-Singer days of the Superman production]. To me, that says I have identified your claims pretty exactly. My evaluation of your posts stands. By the way - I guess the decline in the number of "leaks" you get to hear about couldn't possibly have anything to do with the studios getting better at dealing with the internet in the last ten years? It couldn't have anything to do with the fact that the publicity machine has now built into itself mechanisms for dispensing "controlled" leaks to sources it likes - or the fact that now all major film releases have their own websites, where production stills, early commentary, etc., end up getting published in a controlled setting? No? It's none of those things? It's just that Harry has lost his independence? Wow. Bad Harry. Bad, bad Harry.

  • May 8, 2005, 8:09 p.m. CST

    Harry, where the hell is the review?

    by timmer33

    All you talk about is how sad it is to see the last SW film ever! How did this compare to AOTC? TPM? Give us a goddamn review!

  • May 8, 2005, 8:56 p.m. CST

    Interesting review, but....

    by FuzzyWhisper

    The constant unnecessary expletives made reading it through to completion a chore. I wanted a review of the movie, not a slavering, barely intelligible rant punctuatuated with an ungodly excess of vulgarity. "Goody two shoe clueless fucks?" Surely you're capable of coming up with something a little more articulate than that. But with that said, it's always nice to see a fellow fan's perspective. Thanks for the impressions.

  • May 8, 2005, 9:18 p.m. CST

    Now I'm excited

    by n705689

    After reading Harry's review, I'm really excited to see this movie. I know that I'll probably walk out of the theatre feeling depressed but can always go home and watch the OT on DVD to see the good guys win.

  • May 8, 2005, 10:04 p.m. CST

    Wookie Dookie Review

    by Robert23Scott

    Harry, there is one thing worse then reading your review, and that is listening to the dialogue off of ATTACK OF THE CLONES. You Suck Wookie manure! Is this a life story or a review.

  • May 8, 2005, 11:10 p.m. CST

    Broncofan. . .

    by krullboy

    What are the new names for ForeverTJ and CocoLopez? What about George the 7th Chicken? Thanks for the advice on Super Shadow. I have always taken SuperShadow's stuff with a grain of salt. Do you have any idea who that guy is? The truth is out there

  • May 8, 2005, 11:12 p.m. CST

    ROTS reviews

    by Phimseto

    Revenge of the Sith has been getting positive reviews, but many of them are of the "damning with faint praise" variety. A common vein is that they write off the first half of the film, and say that the last half generally succeeds. Honestly, that sounds disappointing to me. One thing that I have read in a few places now that really bugs me is that there is dialogue aplenty which apparantly is meant to be a snot-nosed bit of liberalism aimed at George Bush. It is so overt as to not be missed or recognized for anything else. Whatever you may think of Bush, you have to agree that putting something so referential into the film is an unnecessarily jarring and unwise action. Finally, on a slight tangent, I saw the trailer for "The Island" today. I was taken aback by how overtly lifted some of the imagery was from "THX-1138." See for yourself. It is quite brazen! I guess it is meant to be a "homage." Is Michael Bay allowed to do homages?

  • May 8, 2005, 11:15 p.m. CST

    BroncoFan

    by bigblackock

    Don't spoil Krull's fun. He only provided encouragement due to his obvious snubs. And the I would like to punch out every one of Elway's chiclet teeth.

  • May 8, 2005, 11:25 p.m. CST

    bigblackock, What the Fuck??????

    by krullboy

    I am a little confused about your post. What were the "obvious snubs" you were referring to?

  • May 9, 2005, 12:03 a.m. CST

    Fucking awesome

    by jelac07

    All I have to say is that that review... was fucking awesome and explains how it is!! Sad as it may be.. I can't wait

  • May 9, 2005, 1:13 a.m. CST

    hate to be the one to tell you this Harry, but

    by Buck_Turgidson

    Your 6 year old reading comprehension is still grasping for every word of every article you could get your grubby (big) hands on

  • May 9, 2005, 3:14 a.m. CST

    supershadow dresses up as lucas and then sits in...

    by banthafodderUK

    .... front of a mirror and 'interviews' himself (while pulling himself to bits into his own beard). Fuck what SS.com says- I still reckon lucas will make the sequels (7-9). THERES TOO MUCH MONEY IN IT!!!!!!

  • May 9, 2005, 3:40 a.m. CST

    Mace Windu's Death...umm what?

    by NoCalMike

    Ok, my question Modillega's review. According to your review, Mace is just about to finish off the emporer and then Anakin cuts off his hand and he falls to his death? Anyone else have a problem with this? I mean cutting off his hand is a good START, but since Windu is supposed to be the greatest Jedi besides Yoda, you'd think it would take a little more. Also, if Mace was in the position to kill the Emporer before Anakin's run-in, then how is it remotely possible that Yoda could not handle The Emporer one-on-one?

  • May 9, 2005, 3:51 a.m. CST

    NoCal Mike. . . Mace Windu's Death

    by krullboy

    When Anakin cuts his hand off, it takes him by surprise; he has Palpatine beat and he is about to slice his ass in half. When Anakin cuts his hand off, it distracts him enough so that Palpatine fries him with Force Lighning and throws him out the window. SPLAT. End of story.

  • May 9, 2005, 3:52 a.m. CST

    I read AICN for the scintillating political commentary...

    by Darth_Inedible

    Hey no one cared when NATO started their illegal war in Bosnia that resulted in plenty of wonderful dead white people. And what about the half a million Iraqi children who died under the sanction regime? I mean the 100,000 number is absolutely fake and based on surveys of households in the most violent areas, but even if you buy that number it sounds like we're in the black, so to speak, compared to Saddam's regime.

  • Sounds like your average Cocolopez evening

  • May 9, 2005, 4:43 a.m. CST

    YOU THINK BUSH IS BAD????

    by banthafodderUK

    AT LEAST YOU FUCKERS DONT HAVE TO PUT UP WITH TONY 'I TOSS BUSH'S SALAD' BLAIR AND HIS UUUUUUGLY FUCKING WIFE. ANYWAY..... ten days to go everyone- i might just be able to cobble enough patience together and avoid watching a pirate copy or rots before i see it in london (dont hold your breath though)

  • May 9, 2005, 4:51 a.m. CST

    Krullboy....

    by banthafodderUK

    .... i hear rumours that coco 'i eat my mum's chocolate tea towel holder' lopez has re-registered on here under a new name! any info mate?

  • May 9, 2005, 4:53 a.m. CST

    Hey BanthafodderUK. . .

    by krullboy

    Try living in Asia and avoiding the pirated copies. ROTS doesn't come out here until May 26th, so I am more frustrated then you were with the Michele Heaton Celebrity Wrestling thing last week!!!!I think the biggest news of this entire TB is the fact that MinasPenis2 has not POSTED ONCE!! I am sure as soon as the rumors start that Peter Jackson is going to film "the Hobbit", MinasPenis will be back in all his irreverent glory. Where is this guy? Like I said before, he is probably sitting in his room, naked, maybe wearing the "mouth of Sauron" or "Witch King of Agmar" helmets from Sideshow collectibles, pouring hot wax on his beast, while watching the extended version of ROTK, while using every magazine with SW on the cover as his personal loo paper, and finally shoving 12 inch Amadala dolls up his ass while singing "a day in a life" by Cocolopez. WHERE ARE YOU MINASTIRITH? COME OUT, COME OUT WHEREVER YOU ARE!!!

  • May 9, 2005, 4:56 a.m. CST

    WHO (and where) is Cocolopez?

    by krullboy

    BanthafodderUK, I have heard people say that he has reregistered, but I have not seen anything approaching his eleoquent writing, to say nothing of him talking about his group. I did hear that he may be going by the name of Marvin Gardens (the name of his boy band), but who knows.

  • May 9, 2005, 5:09 a.m. CST

    castaneda

    by howudoinchewbaca

    People are always talking about Campbell's influence on Lucas. I'm more curious about Obi-wan and Yoda's link to Don Juan and Don Genaro in the Castaneda books. Check out "Journey to Ixtlan" for some enlightening correspondences. "Luminous beings we are" is taken straight out of that bitch. WOOO.

  • May 9, 2005, 5:10 a.m. CST

    Krullboy: re minuspenis2

    by banthafodderUK

    apparently, he calls the spunk-eye of his skin flute "mouth of Sauron"

  • May 9, 2005, 5:18 a.m. CST

    Bet harry to it again!!! What's the bets that he'll post this to

    by Cpt Kirks 2pay

    Hey Man, this Toupee didn't work in SPOILS REJECT SHOP for nothing you know. 'Reject', now many fucked up nights trying to pull 16 year old girls in Thursday nightclub Pzazz, will verify this. Damn, one day I WILL get it right, I WILL get it right. TV series filmed in Sydney By Michael Bodey 09-05-2005 From: The Daily Telegraph

  • May 9, 2005, 5:24 a.m. CST

    Not ANOTHER trip to down under jst to work on this film...?

    by Cpt Kirks 2pay

    Fuckballs. I was gonna spend the rest of my life practicing with a broomstick so I could be a dodgy Jedi Extra on this!!! Oh, and Krullboy and Banthafodder, regarding the Michelle Heaton thing? Well, as I find myself saying EVERY Thursday (or Turdsay) night down Pzazz to all the blokes there - 'GET YOUR HANDS OFF MY BITCH!!!!' It was I who saw Michelle Heaton first, It was I who talked about her in the first place, It was I who allowed your Rebel friends to know the whereabouts of the shield generator. Why ain't you talking to ME about her Krullboy?

  • May 9, 2005, 5:28 a.m. CST

    Sorry CptKirks2Pay. . .

    by krullboy

    I got you confused with your mate on that issue, though I am sure Michelle is not above doing a 3 header!!!

  • May 9, 2005, 5:29 a.m. CST

    WHERES MY MONEY KIRK???

    by banthafodderUK

    ..........................? (AAAH, THURSDAYS IN P'ZAZZ- THOSE WERE THE DAYS.........

  • May 9, 2005, 5:33 a.m. CST

    No they weren't!!!!

    by Cpt Kirks 2pay

    I got blown out down there, more than my Pop Plus Fiesta's exhaust pipe. I'm off to be a dodgy Extra in Holby City today anyway. Loved to stay and chat on here my whole life, but duty calls. Might catch Michelle Heaton down there doing TOTP, and see if she's up for this scrum bashing.

  • May 9, 2005, 5:33 a.m. CST

    DONT APOLOGISE KRULLBOY...

    by banthafodderUK

    ...AND AS FOR YOU KIRK- MICHELLE HEATON CAN EASILY MANAGE A 3 COCK SPECIAL, SO DONT GET GREEDY (AND YOU LOVED IT DOWN P'ZAZ, DONT PRETEND OTHERWISE - THATS WHERE LEARNED ABOUT THE WHOLE WORLD MAN

  • May 9, 2005, 5:36 a.m. CST

    KIRK....

    by banthafodderUK

    WHAT EPISODE OF THE BILL ARE YOU IN THIS WEEK (OR IS IT NEXT WK?) LET ME KNOW

  • May 9, 2005, 6:51 a.m. CST

    BBC NEWS LINK....

    by banthafodderUK

    http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/entertainment/film/4528639.stm Sounding like we're all going to be ok with this baby (although i still want to be the judge of it for myself). fingers crossed

  • May 9, 2005, 7:32 a.m. CST

    Thanks BanthafodderUK. . . .

    by krullboy

    As Vader says in ANH, "The Force is strong with this one". Go to rottentomatoes.com for some more reviews. And F Coclopez. And F MinastirithII and all his Gary Glitter, batty boy, Brighton Beach entourage.

  • May 9, 2005, 8:08 a.m. CST

    krullboy....

    by banthafodderUK

    .... DO YOU POST ON THAT TOO MATE?

  • May 9, 2005, 9:43 a.m. CST

    Revenge of the Sith makes Spielberg cry

    by PhilConnors

    There's an article about it on drudgereport.com, however I can't view it thanks to websense. If anyone would post the text of the article in this talkback I'd appreciate it.

  • May 9, 2005, 9:47 a.m. CST

    never mind

    by PhilConnors

    Spielberg says: "I saw it about a week ago, and it's absolutely amazing. It's the best of the last three episodes. It's the best way you could possibly imagine for George to finish it off, it has a tremendous ending and it's very dark. You'll cry at the end, it's wonderful."

  • May 9, 2005, 9:49 a.m. CST

    No surprise here, Harold peed his pants over the first two shitt

    by minderbinder

    I expect many will be like Time's review and praise it for sucking less. Nothing like low expectations. Anyway, it will probably be online before opening day anyway so I don't care that much about reviews.

  • May 9, 2005, 9:54 a.m. CST

    HERE YA GO PHIL (ITS NOT ALL THAT THO - BIT BRIEF)

    by banthafodderUK

    Director STEVEN SPIELBERG wept at a premiere of pal GEORGE LUCAS' final STAR WARS movie EPISODE III: REVENGE OF THE SITH. JURASSIC PARK film-maker, Spielberg was so moved by the eagerly-awaited conclusion of the sci-fi saga, he burst into tears at its screening last week (begs29APR05). But he's unashamed by his tears, insisting fans will also cry at the end of the film, because its moving conclusion marks the end of Lucas' epic story. Spielberg says, "I saw it about a week ago, and it's absolutely amazing. "It's the best of the last three episodes. It's the best way you could possibly imagine for George to finish it off, it has a tremendous ending and it's very dark. You'll cry at the end, it's wonderful."

  • May 9, 2005, 10:27 a.m. CST

    Obi Wan turned because of Anakin.

    by anointed

    Since watching the prequels, I am convinced that Anakin wouldn't have turned if his mentor (Obi Wan)hadn't been such a pompous ass. Phrases likes "Whats this?" and "..another pathetic lifeform," led me to think he was an ass. Where Qui Gon seemed to be concerned with others around him (dumb ass Jar Jar and the slave boy Anakin)Obi Wan just wanted to do what needed to be done and get the hell on. The only thing is, I can't tell if Lucas wrote him this way, or his directing made him seem this way.

  • May 9, 2005, 10:52 a.m. CST

    BathafodderUK. . .

    by krullboy

    No mate, I do not post on rottentomatoes.com. I do go to it to say a wide range of reviews. If you look, some are from pretty reputable periodicals, while others look like fanboy wetdream websites, so you get a true mix.

  • May 9, 2005, 10:54 a.m. CST

    Sorry, meant to say BANTHAFODDERUK. .

    by krullboy

    I owe you a pint and a night with three Bangkok hookers for that one mate. Hope you like girls that can fire ping pong balls from the punani. And just to stay on topic, I'm Padme could do wonders with inanimate objects as well.

  • May 9, 2005, 10:56 a.m. CST

    I'm SURE Padme could do wonders. .

    by krullboy

    Damn it, I'm posting more than MinasTirithII.

  • May 9, 2005, 10:59 a.m. CST

    CHEERS KRULLBOY

    by banthafodderUK

    So are you based in bankok then? - My mate at work said that the hookers there open bottles of beer with their hairy axe wound? is this true??? (and what are these blow job bars????) Yeah, padme could do wonders (but she needs better tits)

  • May 9, 2005, 11:19 a.m. CST

    bring me the head of Minus PenisII

    by banthafodderUK

    I want to drink beer out of his head - I want to have a MinusPenisII skull keg party - What happens to vader's cock and balls? did he replace them? or did he just whack on loads of aftersun? Hey everyone - If you're in the UK, you can catch cpt kirks 2pay on the ITV1 sho 'the bill' - he's on it either this week or next

  • May 9, 2005, 12:57 p.m. CST

    LOL

    by Right Bastard

    Howard Stern just said that he wants to take a porn star to the Star Wars lines and see if he can get any of the geeks to give up their place in line in exchange for sex...with a girl.

  • May 9, 2005, 2:31 p.m. CST

    BLUE YODA??

    by Chuck Norris

    Hello what is this rumor I hear of there being a secret BLUE YODA in the scene after the credits?? why would george lucas do this to me, he is raping my childhood. Alos I am sad to hear that billy dee williams will not be reprising his role as Lando CAlrisssian, but will in fact be forced to portray Lando's nephew GRANDO calrissian?? ConfirM??

  • May 9, 2005, 2:52 p.m. CST

    Oh Chuck...

    by KipWinger

    Chuck, you sick Bastard. I thought we covered this: Blue Yoda is a dream you had five yeard ago after I rocked your ear drums so hard that you forgot how to karate kick. Also, Billy Dee CAN'T portray Lando, because as we all know Lando is now a Jedi and he gets killed by Anakin/Vader. Didn't you watch the DVDs? Lando was edited out and replaced by Jar Jar. Duh.

  • May 9, 2005, 3:28 p.m. CST

    I've just read the first and last paragraphs of Harry's review

    by evergreen

    ...because I'm still trying to stay as spoiler-free as possible. But when I get out of the final screening in Leicester Square in a week's time, I'll be reading it - and I hope I'll be feeling as positive as Harry seems to be. Or as negative, depending on your point of view. I haven't been this excited about an action film in a long time....

  • May 9, 2005, 3:47 p.m. CST

    Anakin quotes George W. Bush!!!

    by 5279294017

    Just as Anakin is about to start the fight with Obi Wan, he utters a line all too familiar. "If you are not with me, you are my enemy." George W. said "You are either with us, or against us." Hmmmm...

  • May 9, 2005, 3:51 p.m. CST

    Has Anyone Checked Out Rotten Tomatoes?

    by ZombieSolutions

    ROTS has a 89% Fresh rating! Oh, May 19th! Why are you soooo far away?

  • May 9, 2005, 3:53 p.m. CST

    On A Sad Note, the ROTS PS2 Game Is Getting Abysmal Reviews

    by ZombieSolutions

    oh well.

  • May 9, 2005, 5:08 p.m. CST

    My Sith Review (mild spoilers)

    by Bugaboo

    I saw it last Thursday in NY and MAN I wanted to love it so much. Its good...Its better than the last two, but it falls short of even Jedi because of some real "Cringe" dialog moments. Done get me wrong, the actions great, and I even enjoyed the falll of Anakin (hurried as it might seem) But I was even taken out of the excellent ending when I heard the fully armored Darth Vader speaking "whiny" Anakin lines.... Or Padme's desperate, death throw moaning/naming of her children. Sigh... or Bail Organa's casual, shrugged shouldered...."well my wife has always wanted a baby girl, Ill take her". I tried so hard to LOVE it... maybe too hard, but the magic wasnt there. Still worth your time and money to see, but if possible watch with realistic expectations...

  • May 9, 2005, 6:47 p.m. CST

    Ferris confirms my fears...

    by BarrelRider

    ...but that's ok, because I purposely brought my expectations waaaaay low for this movie, so I'm sure I'm gonna love it, while at the same down knowing that it isn't as good as any of the films in the OT, and also knowing that it could've been something magnificent if names like Kasdan, Brackett, Kurtz and Kershner been involved. No matter, I'll be seeing an Obi Wan/Anakin lightsaber fight in a couple of weeks, and I'm still pretty excited about that.

  • May 9, 2005, 7:22 p.m. CST

    How many people here have seen THX-1138?

    by InBloom

    ,,,I'll bet the ones who have aren't the people ranting about how Lucas will definitely make eps 7-9. Watch that film, and you'll realise how the success of Star Wars was a massive surprise to Lucas, one which diverted him for 30 years before he could continue his journey as a film maker. And as for the people claiming that AICN's days are numbered now that SW is over - please get a grip on reality, especially you, Is it not cool? - you're delusional and very, very confused.

  • May 9, 2005, 7:23 p.m. CST

    ....and Kingralphuk:

    by InBloom

    ..your first" post made me laugh so hard, I think a little bit of turd came out.

  • May 9, 2005, 9:38 p.m. CST

    BanthafodderUK, regarding Asian hookers. . .

    by krullboy

    Mate, I am not in Thailand, but in Korea. Though there is wild shit here, such as "Hooker Hill" in Seoul where the slags have something called "Black Syphillis", as well as "Anal Drip"--anal lesions that leak pus, your mates in Thailand have it made. Besides opening a bottle with the hairy axe wound as you called, Thai hookers can fire ping pong balls across a room, pick up coins (with no hands, wink wink), shove a banana in the punani and gently pinch chunks out into the willing mouths of horny Westerners. Got to be careful in Thailand though; they have a phenomenon called "lady boys", guys that look so real in drag you think they are women. Many a Westerner has gone there, thinking he is about ready to get a piece of "Asian Persuasion", only to get a surprise much like Francis Begby in "Trainspotting".

  • May 10, 2005, 2:28 a.m. CST

    Says Palpatibe to Yoda:

    by John Anderton

    All your base are belong to us!

  • May 10, 2005, 2:32 a.m. CST

    cheers Krullboy

    by banthafodderUK

    anal drip (sounds like a track from the new cocolopez spoken bollocks album). be careful cos it said on the news this morning that N Korea are about to test nukes!!!!! Fuck that!!! (I know why minuscockus2 isnt about, hes stuck in a paradox due to having to choose between the gondorian collection of helmets while he polishes his own 'special helmet').

  • May 10, 2005, 2:39 a.m. CST

    I Just Hope...

    by Puma Man

    ...that I can get a ticket for the midnight screening in a couple of days, when I actually have money. *sigh*

  • May 10, 2005, 3:15 a.m. CST

    Kim Jong Il, "Anal drip" and the Cocolopez band

    by krullboy

    BanthafodderUK, that is an excellent idea for the title of the new CocoLopez CD, not to be outdone by other prize hits such as "Pissing fire from me Ho", "Don't let your son go down on me", and "Should my cock be rotting off (after knobbing my sister)". The North Korean nuke stuff is saber rattling. They love to do stuff like that when they need stuff; it is their typical diplomatic game of brinksmanship: scare everyone, and then get what you want. I just wonder if Kim Jong Il has seen "Team America"!!! And I agree with the MinasTirithII thing as well. I bet he already has purchased 10 sets of the "Buckleberry Ferry" building so that he can place them on the floor of his bedroom and walk around naked, pretending that he is a rage filled cave troll.

  • May 10, 2005, 3:28 a.m. CST

    Krullboy, minas just got......THE COCK OF SAURON by Sideshow col

    by banthafodderUK

    I dont think he's pretending to be in a rage - I think he's totally pissed off that he can't fit the latest sideshow collectibles number;- "THE COCK OF SAURON" up his rusty sherrif's badge (apparently he's filmed himself during this ritual and is now trying to persuade cockguzzlerlopez to use it as the video for his upcoming spokenwordinabhangrastyle tune entitled "I just cant fit enough up my council gritter").

  • May 10, 2005, 3:51 a.m. CST

    why...

    by noodlenoodle

    are there so many really nasty personal attacks on Harry? Why is that acceptable? This is his site, everyone is entitled to their own opinion without having someone say absolutely bloody vitriolic stuff about them. Grow up and be constructive or be quiet. The hate that eminated out of some of these talkbacks is really shocking and ultimately pointless.

  • is also being recorded by Cocolopez on an import called "How DEEP is your Love (pushed in).

  • May 10, 2005, 5:48 a.m. CST

    Coco's new nick......

    by Plazola_MEX

    I found out what his new nick is......It's JACKSON'S DICK LICKER

  • May 10, 2005, 5:54 a.m. CST

    Where is he? Where's MinusLamer?

    by Plazola_MEX

    I think he went to gandalf's place to ask him a cure for his envy....and a healing potion for all his wounds made of so much punches given here for him.

  • May 10, 2005, 6:10 a.m. CST

    i didnt know coco drank...

    by banthafodderUK

    .... michael jackson's 'magic water'

  • May 10, 2005, 6:40 a.m. CST

    BanthafodderUK and Plazola_Mex,

    by krullboy

    I just want to know where THE FUCK those two have gone. These ROTS TBs should have been their arena, with all the world watching (or reading). Fucking Lame!! For all his bravado about LOTR (which I love) and Tolkien (which he proved time and time again he knew nothing about), MinasTirithII is a big fucking no show, kind of like Chelsea in the UEFA Cup. Cocolopez' disapprearance? Well we have said that he could be anywhere, and after that epic night that he got HIS ASS THRASHED and served to him on a hot fucking plate, he has been gone. Some say he goes under the name "marvin gardens", but I have not seen it. After I walk out of ROTS, while I am taking a long, Mountain Dew fueled piss in the theater bathroom, I'll be envisioning those fucks taking in every drop of my Force-strengthened urine. Fuck the both of them. When I signed up for this TB account (which took forever by the way since you could not for months), I told myself that I would not get emotional about Internet comments, but those two took the cake. I should make my own SW movie, just to start a new TalkBack to get those losers back here. When I go back to Queens, I'll ask a few DJs in the know if they have ever heard of "Marvin Gardens". Without a doubt, they'll say he is some 25 year old has been tweeker that gives hand jobs for crack behind clubs like "Twilek". MinasTirithII is just an abomination to LOTR fans. If I was a Tolkien die hard as much as MinasPenis claims to be, I would buy an extended version of ROTK, just to shove up his ass, unlubed. What a fucking waste.

  • May 10, 2005, 7:37 a.m. CST

    Erm.....

    by evergreen

    Jewjew: Yep - Ghandi's an impressive film alright, and if you look at most published film critics' "top 20 films of all time", Ghandi will usually make it into the top 20. But ET usually makes it into the top 10. It's a fucking masterpiece, without a doubt Spielberg's best film, and people who know about film are well aware of this.

  • May 10, 2005, 8:32 a.m. CST

    evergreen/JewJewBoy.........

    by banthafodderUK

    it's okay chaps - I've just read that they're making GHANDI vs E.T.!!!!!! Now we'll know for sure who the winner is (coming soon for 2006.............)

  • May 10, 2005, 9:17 a.m. CST

    Bantha: I look forward to it!

    by evergreen

    There aren't enough crossover films these days. Look, JewJewboy, your basic mistake is in assuming that ET can't be as good as Ghandi because Ghandi is a "grown-up" film, whereas ET is a "kids" film. Taste has absolutely nothing to do with it in this instance, it's about cinematic accomplishments, and ET is every bit as much of an achievement as Ghandi. Film critics all over the world loved it too. Probably the most famous, and one of the more respected critics in the UK is Barry Norman. Here's his list of 100 favourite films of the 20th Century, in a lphabetical order: http://www.freston.net/stuff/barrynorman100.html I'm not saying that the word of critics is the be-all and end-all, but look at any area of the industry - ask what other directors thought of the film, other writers, producers actors etc. It is universally acknowledged as being a great film, not least by Richard Attenborough, yes that's right, the guy who directed your precious Gandhi. Your error is classic - you've mistaken "worthy subject matter" for "quality". Here's a top 100 as voted for by the (british)public: http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/low/entertainment/391658.stm Again, lists aren't flawless - no fucking list of my best films would have titanic in it, even at number 5000, but if you ignore the weighting in the top two positions in the chart, which were boosted by proactive fanboys and teenage girls, you get a list not unlike Mr Norman's. And finally, can I just say: obviously I thought changing the guns to walkie-talkies was utter shit, but what does that prove? That directors who were radical in the 70s have now begun to resemble the things which they rebelled against? Rich studio execs anxious to appeal to the widest demographic possible? Directors altering certain scenes from their earlier films to make them less edgy, more simplistically moralist? Now, where have I seen that before......?

  • May 10, 2005, 9:55 a.m. CST

    This movie should've been EPISODE I

    by The Kill Switch

    These prequels have beeen one giant miscalculation. Revenge of the Sith shouldv'e been Episode I, and Episodes II and III should've dealt with the rise of the Rebel Alliance, the construction of Death Star and whatever Vader and the Emperor were doing all those years between killing Jedi and A New Hope. Anyone agree with me?

  • May 10, 2005, 11:27 a.m. CST

    Yes Kill Switch

    by GreenieBrit

    I agree with that. So far most film and t.v projects that i've looked forward to have fallen flat on their ass due mostly to CGI: Sky Captain - wank. SW Ep.I - CGI Care Bear bollocks SW Ep. II - So not much Jar Jar but way too much shite. New Doctor Who - Appalling why use CGI if its cheaper and more effective to use puppets/models you Beeb c##ts?

  • May 10, 2005, 12:01 p.m. CST

    a crowning achievement by comparison

    by cantankerous

    Attack of the Clones set the bar so low that ROTS will be considered a crowning achievement by comparison. Imagine what the Star Wars prequels could have been with someone like Peter Jackson at the helm. It

  • May 10, 2005, 12:19 p.m. CST

    4 reviews up on CHUD

    by Right Bastard

    http://chud.com/reviews/2852

  • May 10, 2005, 2:08 p.m. CST

    Give us a break

    by Reyvn_DarKnight

    This is what you said for Phantom Menace. This is what you said for Attack of the Clones. Come on Harry just admit it. This movie is going to suck cheez whiz outta the can and the real War in the Stars we need to watch is Serentity because we will finally get a rogue who ISN'T afraid to shoot the bad guys first.

  • May 10, 2005, 2:22 p.m. CST

    "Appalling why use CGI if its cheaper and more effective to use

    by minderbinder

    One of the biggest reasons there's so much CGI nowadays is because it's pretty cheap. Or at least it can be done cheaply. Puppets and models are cool, but it takes manpower to do those as well ($$$$$).

  • May 10, 2005, 3:01 p.m. CST

    MinusLamer and CocoLopez I want them Fucked...!!!

    by Plazola_MEX

    Let's gather some money an hire some Yakusa or mafia killers to fuck up those cocksuckers.

  • May 10, 2005, 3:22 p.m. CST

    Interesting Thread on the IMDB

    by splatpnk

    http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0120915/board/nest/18850710

  • May 10, 2005, 3:27 p.m. CST

    Archenemysis:

    by BarrelRider

    I doubt that it'll be this one. But I'm equally sure that the longest TB ever probably was a Star Wars talkback. Possibly Harry's early AOTC review. I'd be interested to know myself actually. Could somebody tell us? Then again, if this turns out to be the talkback where everybody starts putting up their own reviews in a couple of week's time, it could easily become the longest ever talkback.... what a daunting thought.

  • May 10, 2005, 3:42 p.m. CST

    CHUD's reviews are in....

    by zikade zarathos

    ...and they're more in line with what I'm expecting from the majority of critics not blinded by the geek giddiness of seeing Vador in full outfit. Basically: It's OK, not great, not even very good in parts. 7 out of 10. Does anyone REALLY trust ANY reviews of a Star Wars movie from this site anymore? There are some movies that are guaranteed Harry-raves, and the next one is KING KONG.

  • May 10, 2005, 3:49 p.m. CST

    LAST

    by clump-o-matic

    Last once again you ignerrent phewls! LAST!

  • May 10, 2005, 3:59 p.m. CST

    E.T. in an infinitely stronger piece of cinema than Ghandi

    by Krinkle

    And anyone who thinks otherwise has no sense of the filmic. End of story.

  • May 10, 2005, 4:06 p.m. CST

    FOR FUCK SAKES! YOU ARE A REAL FUCKIN' NERD!

    by TorontoScoots

    I'm still waiting for your fuckin' review of this bloody movie. Stop talking shit about your childhood and your Daddy!

  • May 10, 2005, 5:06 p.m. CST

    LAST AGAIN! WOOHOO! U CAN ONLY BE 1st ONCE!

    by clump-o-matic

    Phewlz!!!

  • May 10, 2005, 5:10 p.m. CST

    Star Wars over? Hell no its just started!

    by clump-o-matic

    Why do you wads think this is the end? We are going to have more SW universe movies from a variety of directors including Luc Besson and David Fincher (sell out). Also the massive Star Wars Universe theme park about 100 miles from Orlando will be awesome. Can't wait to see the hotel that is a full scaled landed star destroyer (1977 style). Some cool things in the works will be the Mos Eisley Space Port complete with the Cantina (and band!), speeder bike ride (may be cheesy but still fun), the Pod Races (VR with full sensation in an auditorium). Oh man, talk about the line to wait in!!!!

  • May 10, 2005, 5:11 p.m. CST

    Great ROTS reviews: http://chud.com/news/2860

    by CurryIce

  • May 10, 2005, 6:05 p.m. CST

    reviews

    by Darth Thoth

    Yeah, the guys over at Chud.com thoroughly ripped RoTS and the prequel trilogy as a whole. I respect the opinions expressed as they give a good perspective of the saga. I've read reviews ranging from RoTS being a masterpiece to garbage. Still, every single review I've read on the net agrees that RoTS is far superior to Phantom and AOTC and not even close to ANH and Empire. So, basically it revolves around Jedi territory which to be honest given Phantom and AOTC, is good news in my opinion. But back to Chud.com, I think the reviews really were analysis of the prequel trilogy, its utility, worth, quality, etc. They are a good compliment to Harry's review, which focussed on the merits of RoTS specifically, as a flick and most importantly with respects to being a fan. Both approaches I feel are beneficial and in a way, could possibly agree with one another. For example, while I can be critical/ disappointed with a movie and point out its deficiencies with respects to "movie making," I can still be very geeked out by that movie and enjoy certain aspects of it. There is room for both perspectives within the discourse. So again, the various reviews coming in about RoTS have me really anticipating seeing RoTS next week and staking my claim in this discourse.

  • May 10, 2005, 6:16 p.m. CST

    LOST.... I mean LAST

    by John-Locke

  • May 10, 2005, 7:10 p.m. CST

    How did 6'1" Christensen/Skywalker

    by LewisWetzel

    become 6'7" David Prowse/Darth Vader? Did he get his legs burned off in the lava and replaced with robotic gams? Just askin'...

  • May 10, 2005, 10:33 p.m. CST

    Hmm

    by SeanHarris

    "...and they're more in line with what I'm expecting from the majority of critics not blinded by the geek giddiness of seeing Vador in full outfit." More in line with what you are expecting? You have this movie pegged already, just like the CHUD team seems to have. Look around elsewhere--Sith, from almost all major critics (even some serious prequel haters) is getting great critical praise. Star Wars is going out with a bang--it might just have to be accepted.

  • May 10, 2005, 10:46 p.m. CST

    Currently 93% at

    by christonomist

  • May 10, 2005, 10:48 p.m. CST

    Doh! Meant 93% at Rotten Tomatoes

    by christonomist

    ...and that's with 27 reviews in, mostly professional. Doesn't sound like the "majority of critics" are as cynical as CHUD to me...

  • May 11, 2005, 12:17 a.m. CST

    Chudders and ADP

    by Right Bastard

    I respect the Chud reviews a little more than this site. They didn't pan HhGG as much as they could have, but admitted that it was hard for them to do after pumping that film up for so long (at least they were honest). Though, I think A.DuPont probably hit the nail on the head in her review. She said that it's in Jedi territory, which is o.k. with me. Jedi (non-special olympics version) isn't that bad. Sure, there're a couple of cringes when Chewie pulls a tarzan, and such. It's still watchable. I liked DuPont's line where she said, "I'll be pretending that "Sith" is Episodes I-III combined, myself. And I won't be alone in doing so." If it's as good as she says, I'll be joining her in that attitude.

  • I thought the CHUD dudes came off... rather snobby. Fuck 'em

  • May 11, 2005, 3:37 a.m. CST

    About the Rotten Tomatoes 93% thing....

    by zikade zarathos

    If you actually READ some of those reviews, you'll notice they apply the Positive Tomato Icon to some pretty negative reviews (one of them is from CHUD for God's sake, and says right in the little preview quote, "It doesn't salvage [the prequels]." Like I said, I'll wait for there to be some more reviews (sites like RottenTomatoes and MetaCritic only work until there's about a 100 review pool to get any kind of accurate percentage). Besides, both PHANTOM MENACE and ATTACK OF THE CLONES, two movies almost universally loathed by the Star Wars Geek Elite, got a "Fresh" ranking, so what's that tell you? And Variety, Newsweek and Hollywood Reporter aren't exactly bastions of quality film criticism, either. Regardless, the hardcore fans will love this no matter what, the cynical will hate this no matter what, and it'll make an obscene amount of money no matter what. Oh well.

  • May 11, 2005, 6:03 a.m. CST

    Guess what fags?

    by Thayden Ozma

    NOBODY CARES ABOUT YOUR ONE-SIDED SNIDE ATTEMPTS TO CHANGE THE VIEWS OF OTHERS. STOP NOW, OR RUN THE RISK OF EATING YOUR WORDS. OR WORSE, REGRETTING HOW MUCH OF AN ASSHOLE YOU'VE BEEN FOR THE PAST 5 YEARS. (Do keep in mind that when I say the word "fags" I mean it in the Eminem fashion refering to worthless obnoxious assholes/losers/fucking straight up dorks with nothing better to do who have no self-awareness. Not homosexuals for whom I have no issue with. Homosexuals have yet to cause me any problems with my day to day business, they spend money at my store, speak well, dress nice, have absolutely no opinion on Star Wars and tend to smell better than the lot of you. I'd hate to offend a higher form of life while backlashing at you amoebas.) GET A LIFE, MOVE ON, STAR WARS ROCKS. WE HAVE THE LAST LAUGH. ACCEPT IT, OR CONTINUE TO WASTE YOUR LIFE WITH NEGATIVITY. IT'S YOUR CHOICE FUCKFACES. (Sorry the "Caps Lock" hates you too.)-AZZZZZZZZZ

  • May 11, 2005, 7:15 a.m. CST

    The CHUD reviews are jokes.

    by Lord_Soth

    As usual.

  • May 11, 2005, 9:21 a.m. CST

    denial and reduced expectations are powerful things

    by cantankerous

    Those CHUD reviews hit the nail on the head. ROTS should have gone straight to video. How many repetitive light saber duels and space battles does one have to endure before saying enough? Light saber duels crested in TPM, space battles in ROTJ. Everything after that has been just recycled tripe. These prequels are pointless and painful. They tell a story we already knew, and they tell it so poorly it is almost beyond comprehension. The tragedy of Star Wars isn

  • May 11, 2005, 10:33 a.m. CST

    Reviews, Good, Bad, Whatever!!!!! But....

    by ElJibaro

    My only problem with Nick

  • May 11, 2005, 11 a.m. CST

    The overall RT number can't really be trusted, you have to look

    by minderbinder

    There are enough fanboy websites to push the prequels into "fresh" territory, but on ht efirst two, the cream of the crop was in the 30-40% range, way rotten. Still only 3 in the COTC so far, but they're all positive, if not raves Wonder if that will keep up or if they've just been lucky with the early ones.

  • May 11, 2005, 11:13 a.m. CST

    Minder, you're right about those Fan Boy sites

    by ElJibaro

    but I guess my real point was does it even matter if the "Cream of the Crop" was at a low percentile for these films? I acknowledge those but I have to tell you that those elites didn't change my view on how I did in fact enjoy the prequels. Not one bit mate. But I will degress and keep watching the tomatometer just for curiousity sake to see if it is just in fact lucky with the early ones. Although, Deep down I am rooting for this flick like a tool....sad I know.....

  • May 11, 2005, 11:13 a.m. CST

    Question for anybody who knows the storyline of ROTS

    by InBloom

    Is the Sifo-Dyas thing resolved? Is that name mentioned at all in the script. I'd like a simple yes or no, as I don't really want to now specific plot details, but I'll be a bit pissed off if the whole mystery of the droid army's creation isn't dealt with.

  • May 11, 2005, 11:47 a.m. CST

    "no one is going to tell me how..."

    by Right Bastard

    Good for you. I'm not being facetious. If you like these films...great. I don't think anyone is trying to convince you of anything. But, as one of the masses who was entirely under whelmed by Ep I & II, I find the opinions of critics who consider the first two films as "failures" to be informative. As we've said many times in these TB's, "the numbers" don't really count for much. Financial success is not the same as being entertaining or artistically successful. Jessica Simpson and "White Girls" have made millions of dollars, while Iggy Pop has never had a number one hit. Though Iggy could be considered a financial failure in comparison, his is definitely artistically more successful (and goddamn more entertaining if you've ever seen him live).

  • May 11, 2005, 11:56 a.m. CST

    The numbers

    by Right Bastard

    Of course TPM made a lot of money. It was the first Star Wars movie after a long hiatus. Even I saw it four times. It went something like: First time: A new Star Wars movie!! Yeah!! Second time: Was it good? Let me see it again. Third time: It really was bad, wasn't it? I better see it again. Forth time: Wow, digital presentation was impressive, but the movie still wasn't. **That is why the critical critiques are interesting, to me at least. I don't want to make the same mistake twice (or, four times).

  • May 11, 2005, 12:11 p.m. CST

    cantankerous is right, you know

    by IAmLegolas

    stay on target...

  • May 11, 2005, 12:24 p.m. CST

    Good one Right Bastard but I gotta say...

    by ElJibaro

    That for the critics who didn

  • May 11, 2005, 12:38 p.m. CST

    good point

    by Right Bastard

    Wow, people who (sort of) disagree in a talkback are being friendly? How long can it last? Your Riddick point is well taken. This site blasted Blade III. I rented it the other night and really enjoyed it for what it was! It was an entirely different film than what people were describing. Not an oscar condender, for sure; but fun, none the less.

  • May 11, 2005, 12:44 p.m. CST

    Thanks GOD it's OVER

    by MinasTirithII

    will be downloading this, and Fast Forwarding to the last 20 minutes.

  • May 11, 2005, 1 p.m. CST

    Sifo-Dias Question

    by apostleX

    It is not addressed in the film. It is covered in the book Star WARs: Labyrinth of Evil (prequel story to ROTS) It's really not important since it is obvious that Count Dooku was responsible for ordering the Clone Armies to fight the Separtists.

  • May 11, 2005, 2:03 p.m. CST

    You know what cracks me up, Right?

    by ElJibaro

    Is when you scroll through these talks backs and just witness a sea of Geeks flaming Geeks. I mean what's really the point in all that mess when it's far more convenient to just politely disagree with each other and suggest why. It

  • May 11, 2005, 2:05 p.m. CST

    I CAN'T BELIEVE HARRY ISN'

    by timmer33

  • May 11, 2005, 2:08 p.m. CST

    woops - HARRY, POST A DAMN REVIEW ALREADY. HOW DID IT COMPARE T

    by timmer33

  • May 11, 2005, 3:33 p.m. CST

    The scary thing is...

    by CitizenX

    ...in reading these posts, some of you people have actually managed to produce offspring. I fear for the future...

  • May 11, 2005, 4:10 p.m. CST

    Maybe I'm old, but geek culture has changed, ElJibaro.

    by Right Bastard

    I remember "back in the day" when being a geek had nothing positive about it. It meant getting the crap kicked out of you, no girls talking to you, and Friday nights spent with Dungeons & Dragons and Monty Python rather than parties and beer. There was a great film movement in the 80's, where movies like "Weird Science", "The Breakfast Club", "Goonies", "Stand By Me", "Revenge of the Nerds", and "Lucas" had a message for kids. That message was, "Sure you're a geek. That's who you are. Don't run from it. Accept it, and feel comfortable with yourself." There was a wonderful, subversive quality to being a geek. Many geeks would branch out and become metalheads, punks, or goths; but always hanging on to that "outcast" status. People never thought it would happen, but geek culture has been eaten by society. Just like the punk movement (what the hell is "Blink182" or "Good Charlotte"?) and the Goth movement (Hot Topic in every mall? Bauhaus playing at Coachella?), it is now acceptable to be a geek. This has lead to a rise in people who enter into geek culture, but don't necessarily fit the profile. There are two key aspects to geek culture. Not a love of sci-fi and fantasy. Rather, a love of knowledge, creativity, and helping the little guy. Geeks used to always identify with the little guy, and have compassion because they were, either physically or mentally, bullied. I think that geek bullying doesn't happen to the extent that it used to, which is a good thing. But that also means that the newer people in geek culture don't have that background of hell. It seems like now, there are a lot of Omega geeks, which confuses me. Geeks, though outcasts, always had a little clique of other geeks to hang with. Every geek I knew was a really good friend with all the stoners and knew all the "bad" kids. I don't exactly know why that geek/"bad" kid dynamic always worked, but it did. Anyway, any group of geeks had that one Omega geek, who all the other geeks ganged up on. While most of the group would eventually forgive and even become friends with their former bullies, the Omega geek could never let go of his anger and would eventually do something like that one cop who really enjoys hassling kids. Damn, is it a slow work day, or what? Anyway, what you're saying about geeks fighting geeks confuses me just as much as you. I think there has been a serious drop of creativity, intelligence, and solidarity in geek culture.

  • May 11, 2005, 4:24 p.m. CST

    Pity the Star Wars fan

    by cantankerous

    Pity the Star Wars fan. Initially they had Episode IV and V to hang their hat on, a pair of films that launched the Star War phenomena. They were good, solid entertainment with minimum

  • May 11, 2005, 4:58 p.m. CST

    cantankerous

    by Right Bastard

    LOL...You are one peotic bastard :)

  • May 11, 2005, 6:01 p.m. CST

    CAPTAIN BASTARD AND THE FURIOUS FIVE

    by captain bastard

    yo this is the star wars rap, ive just woken up from a twenty minute nap, hum id like to testify if this ones like the first two you know yous gots ta die, george yeah im talking to you, i hope you realized that they where fuckin poo, yo im like a fuckin jedi, i smoke so much chronic i gots motherfuckin red eye, with jedi mind tricks i got bitches on my dick, sick i like the yoda best i got his fuckin image right here on my vest, test thats what its gonna be, yo this better be the best of the three

  • May 11, 2005, 6:04 p.m. CST

    YES, YES, YES, MINASTIRITHII IS BACK!!!!!

    by krullboy

    "will be downloading this, and Fast Forwarding to the last 20 minutes" Hey pal, glad to see that you finally showed up AND the fact that the movie your profess to hate SO MUCH will actually be seen by you!! Of course, you would download it, rather than saving your lunch money that your mom gives you to see it. I can't believe you are back!!! Way to show up late in the game!! I'm sure this TB will be here for about a week or two, but I'm sure you have been silently slaving away at all your ROTS rants, but when your only post is "will be downloading this, and Fast Forwarding to the last 20 minutes", you disappoint me. I guess YOU WERE jacking off wearing Sideshow Collectible "Mouth of Sauron" mask all the time, explaining why you've been gone. WELCOME BACK KOTTER!!!!!

  • May 11, 2005, 7 p.m. CST

    Another Lame Review Not Worth Dog Crap.

    by jpbellavance

    Do you remember these quotes? 1.My god, I

  • May 11, 2005, 9:27 p.m. CST

    CAPTAIN BASTARDS THOUGHT FOR THE DAY

    by captain bastard

    Hands up all those who think Natalie Portman is hot. (Captain Bastard raises his hand)I do

  • May 11, 2005, 9:46 p.m. CST

    CAPTAIN BASTARD LIVES

    by captain bastard

    just thought id share with all of you the fact that this movie is going to kick major ass this year, just like Return of the Jedi did back in 83. What i dont get is why some people hate on Jedi so much, so the ewoks are in it, big whoop. Out of all three of the original Star Wars movies thats the one i have the fondest memories of and the one i watched the most growing up, sure its more childish than Empire, and isnt as original as a new hope ( obviously) but as a kid growing up that film fuckin rocked (Captain Bastards eyes begin to tear up) You know i believed that these were all but memories of a time when Star Wars ruled, im sorry, im sorry i just get a little emotional about these things (One solitary tear rolls down Captain Bastards face) I just hope this film is awsome thats all, just as the prophecies have told me (or reviews) i hope george lucas has finnally.... (Captain Bastard tries to control himself, he fails, breaks down and finnaly cries, tears pour from his eyes and from the soul of a once broken man, these are not the tears of just any old Star Wars geek, no they are the tears of a warrior. He begins to get up from his computer. He'll be back, oh yes he'll be back, he always is someday, after all hes the Captain)

  • May 11, 2005, 11:19 p.m. CST

    Keep Your Fucking Politics Out Of Your Reviews!!!

    by zigmondsrh

    Holy cow. Nobody cares about your politics! How dare you incorporate your politics into Star Wars? Just review the damn film.

  • Doesn't make sense

  • May 13, 2005, 1:05 a.m. CST

    So...

    by Right Bastard

    what the hell is a Sith anyway? In one series of books, they were a race of aliens. So, is a Sith just another word for "Evil Jedi"? Oh, and do we get to see Boba Fett scalp a Wookie to add skulls to his Mandalinoriranian armor? That's be sweet. If the new TV series is going to be a set of short stories, I want to see the IG88/Boba Fett battle for Han's carbonized carcass.

  • May 13, 2005, 2:42 a.m. CST

    RE:republicans are sith? are you a fu**ing moron or what?

    by Darth Kent

    <<by igotbigballs 2005-05-07 01:22:21 Yeah, Bush used the dark side of the force to get the majority of the country to vote him in. Get real dipshits.>> "Anger, fear, aggression - the dark side of the Force are they" "they have eyes but do not see". Funny, a few days ago, Tom Ridge said that the terror alerts were raised repeatedly with little to no justification. Other sites have charted this and the terror alerts coincide with drops in Bush's popularity or with news and events unavorable to the Bush Administration. Funny how those Alerts have abruptly stopped since Nov 2, eh..... Fear leads to Anger. Anger leads to Hate. Hate leads to suffering....

  • May 13, 2005, 3:05 a.m. CST

    Revenge of the Sh*t

    by CitizenX

    http://www.nyobserver.com/pages/frontpage7.asp

  • May 13, 2005, 9:33 a.m. CST

    I'm sorry, the backlash is still too strong

    by Sepulchrave

    No matter how many geeks try to get me fired up, the implacable march of time and adulthood, the emergence of finer fantasies and the universal drubbings meted out to TPM and AOTC have buried Star Wars permanently. This may be a nice ride, but it'll never inspire the kind of adulation or loyalty that it once did. And I saw ESB when I was six, played with the original figures, played Darth and co with my mates after school. Sorry, over, too little too late. All love gone, nothing left.

  • May 13, 2005, 10:19 a.m. CST

    From Blackwolf the Dragonmaster

    by Dragonmaster

    Greetings, Harry, from Castle Talisker! Well, be aware that I have read your extended review of REVENGE OF THE SITH; and, after considerable examination of its contents, I find myself agreeing with the bulk of what the rest of the planet is saying: namely, that George Lucas has, in effect, hit this one out of the ball park. You must understand, Harry, that this is in fact the first time I'm communicating with the Most Powerful Webmaster in Cyberspace (I have been linked to AICN for quite a while, and find the words of its writers interesting). Still, how does one justify the overall global impact that REVENGE OF THE SITH will most definitely unleash upon the Planet? There is only one answer to that: Let it happen. Being New York's Unofficial Wizard, I must say I have let a good many things in the Star Wars Universe happen. Part of the reason for this is simply that I have been just as eager as the rest of the world in finding out where the Legend will take us next. Recall you, then, that Richard Washington, my Mortal-born alter ego, was but a mere babe of 11 when he first bore witness to the wonders of A New Hope. And, like the rest of the world, the lad was hooked! And eventually, all Richard ever learned about moviemaking per se he discovered through the original "Making of Star Wars" TV special ("The Making of Star Wars, as told by c-3P0 and R2-D2," to give that film its full title). Believe me, Harry, if the vision of Episode III has indeed moved you to tears, that's only because you are beginning to learn, as eventually will we all, how to find a way to let go of the world of the Jedi. That's not to say, of course, that you can't keep the Jedi virtues alive, because, by Merlin's beard, yes you can! In the final analysis, the promise of a Universe flooded with hope is what the Star Wars Hexalogy (hexagon meaning six-sided shapish, you know) is really all about. (By the way, yes, I am indeed the legendary Mage whose passion for Filet-o-Fish was outed, if you will, by that fresh hound himself, Triumph the Insult Comic Dog. Which is how I ended up being on his album. We lost the Grammy for Best Comedy Album, in case anyone remembers. And yes, I am in fact a closet Howard the Duck fan --- and I do mean the 1986 movie, thank you!) Well, Harry, that's that. I hope these comments meant something to you. If not, then I shall have fully tasted the power of the founder of Ain't It Cool News. And more, I shall have enjoyed it. Fearlessly yours, Master Blackwolf

  • May 13, 2005, 12:56 p.m. CST

    In honor of the last new Star Wars film to be released in theate

    by OilyMcBride

    ....the band I'm in, The Banana Convention, has recorded our tribute to the greatest bad ass ever to roam the galaxy. Enjoy. http://www.thebananaconvention.com/music/IWannaBeHanSolo.mp3

  • May 13, 2005, 6:22 p.m. CST

    Talking Yoda made my son's 10th birthday the best ever!

    by Aspiringaspirer

    Imagine my jaw on the floor as Yoda spelled out the entire plot of SWEPIII to my son on the day he turned 10 (which happened to be exactly one month to the day before the public premiere of SWEPIII), complete with hand, head, and eye gestures, in his wacky, Frank Oz, voice, and with his pompous and reverent Yoda-speak. My memories of seeing the first Star Wars as a 10-year-old are contained inside a starry universe of clear dark nights at the nearest drive-in theater to Pasadena, CA, laying out the back hatch of my parent's beige, 1971, VW Bus, with the seats folded down, on a cheesy foam rubber mattress with a slipcover, and with an overpowering scent of the rubber interior. San Gabriel, Monrovia, Burbank, El Monte - all once held enchanted, car-bound gateways to movie fantasy worlds for young, pajama-clad, boys and girls, who would beg their parent for snacks from the snack bar, and a chance to go on the token metal swingsets, right below the screen, that looked like an insect after the ants had all swarmed onto it to strip meat from bone. Its much harder to pull off the concept of "larger than life" these days to this generation of children, who are pressured to use condoms and know about sex before they are even old enough to put on a jockstrap and a cup that even begins to fit them, and play America's pastime, if it can even still claim that title. For my son on his tenth birthday, talking Yoda provided a larger than life experience for both a son and a father, a rare trick indeed, and one which will in no way diminish what I expect to be one of the best times that I ever spend with my boy in a traditional movie theater on May 19th. The ways things seemed headed, it doesn't seem like we will get many more opportunities like this, even if the new films are worth it, just like the extinction of the drive-in movie theater, the public movie theater is headed for extinction, in favor of the much more comfortable and private living room, that is the fully-wired living room...

  • May 13, 2005, 7:34 p.m. CST

    WHEN I WAS FIVE

    by punk26

    When i was five years old I saw the first Star Wars and i thought that one was a huge piece of crap. I felt this way probably because in my heart I knew that one day I'd have a girlfriend who would have sex with me. Flash forward twenty years later when i saw Episode 1 on DVD and me and that six year old boy were high fiving each other over what a huge piece of crap this one was too. For those of us that really love Star Wars the release of this third polished turd is a real relief. We know that this is the last of the Star Wars video games that we will be forced to suffer through. I do want to thank Mr Lucas for making these three new movies. He has so tarnished the Star Wars franchise that I probably wont have to sit through these God awful movies with my kids...because even my four year old fell asleep during Attack of the Clones....I cant wait to see my last Star Wars film.....oh shit it hasn't come out on DVD so for me the wait has just began.

  • May 13, 2005, 9:25 p.m. CST

    I'm with Harry

    by waggawagga

    Anyone from the UK who can remember when Opal Fruits cost 7 pence, and can shut their eyes and see the original Star Wars figures in their original packaging with big red Woolworths 50p stickers on will get the vibe that Harry is talking about. Any kid that had mental orgasms at the thought that Father Christmas might bring them the Millenium Falcon on Christmas morning will get where Harrys coming from. As for me I remember the day I first heard that George Lucas had plans to make 'three films before and three films after', it was the day after we had all piled into my mates mums mini hillman and driven an hour to Eastbourne all pretending to be Luke or Yoda or Han or Chewie, misting up the windows of the car with our excitement and no doubt driving the birthday boys mother up the fucking wall. I will never forget the excitment and anticipation of that drive and the utter amazement as I watched the film. Right now I can remember the excitement of seeing 'speederbikes' for the first time, and the gut crushing happy sad moment when Vader was put on the funeral Pyre on Endor, knowing that he was gone but that the war was won. The feeling of walking out of that cinema knowing that I would never see another Star Wars film made me so sad. Christ that was the early eighties and the next day in the playground at school when I was told that line, 'he will make three films before and three films after'. I didn't dare believe it, but I so wanted it to be true, I wanted to see Darth Vader when he was a boy and wanted to see Luke and Leia's Mum, god I wanted to see Alderaan and see what the Empire was like before the Emperor, I wanted to know how Obi Wan had got Vader's lightsaber... For the next 12 years we heard nothing but rumours, some said he definitely would make more, the others giving me a crushing unfulfilled feeling when the news was announced that there would be no more. But then one day it happened, the news was confirmed by Lucas in the flesh, there were to be three more Star Wars films and they would be the prequels. The excitement of the very first time I saw Star Wars rushed back, but then the bitter sweet end of ROTJ took over, because then started the wait for the release of the first film.... In the months leading up to the day the Phantom Menace launched I tried to ask myself what would happen if I was dissapointed with how it looked, or how the effects would compare to other contemporary films, there was endless conjecture in the media, and I started to think what if I didn't like it. All the way to the day of the film these doubts continued. However as I pulled my coat on and walked out of the house to go to the cinema I let that 8 year old take over, bought some popcorn and watched the film through his eyes and got caught up in the story. I loved having all the blanks filled in seeing Annekins Mum, the jedi council, Obi Wans mentor, Yoda the statesman and finding out how 3p0 came to be. As a 23 year old watching the film as independent fayre, which most people seemed to have done, then I might have been let down, but I wasn't cos I just let the story take me along and let the images wash through my mind and let that 8 year old revell in it. I watched the Attack of the Clones in the same way and let the story take me, loving the synergy of Annekin and Lukes paths... My children, twin boys were born at the beginning of 1998 and I looked forward to a day when I could share the Star Wars experience with them, wondering if they would ever get the same buzz and excitement that Lucas had prompted in my technologically sparse 8 year old life. Next week I will find out because I am going to be taking my 7 year old sons to their first movie theatre screening of star wars - albeit in the guise of ROTS, they have seen the others on DVD and enjoyed them all. At the moment they are so excited I have to answer a million questions a day about the Star Wars universe, there are three of us just about ready to piss our pants with excitement! You see we are about to get the next sliver of the story more blanks will be filled in. This is what Star Wars is about, not 20 year olds that grew up watching tv screenings of the movies with adverts at christmas and Grandpa Joe farting and gurning in the background, bitching about technicalities and their conceived notions of what these movies should be like or about. Its about the pure unadulterated excitement of going to the movie theatre to see a brand new episode for the first time. Next week I will be able to experience being 8 again, I won't care about plot deficiencies, or cg screens or any other so called technical deficiency, cos I'll be wrapped up in the story of watching Luke's mum die, and his Dad fight Obi Wan, I'm going to meet Chewbacca for the first time!I'll get to see all the things I could but imagine when I left that theatre in Eastbourne all those years ago. So I thank George Lucas, and if he could make me three sequels that are half as fun as these have been then I would be able to carry and feel the excitement of that 8 year old into the next decade of my life. But I reckon that perhaps my kids are just about to embark on their own decade long wait....

  • May 14, 2005, 12:21 p.m. CST

    Peter Jackson in Revenge of the Sith

    by stlfilmwire

    I have read on IMDB and all over that Jackson has a cameo as a blue senator... but then when I saw Revenge of the Sith, it listed Jackson as a stand-in for Hayden... which is strange because during that part where Darth yells no, I always thought he was shaped wrong... and then when I read the end credits, something told me that the figure yelling no was Peter Jackson. Does anyone know for sure?

  • 1: Peter Jackson would have instantly improved the prequels had he directed them. 2: ILM can indeed be one-upped by another effects company...in this case WETA. One needs no more proof than reading animation director Rob Coleman say he "studied Gollum" to better the look of Yoda in ROTS(this from the new EW) 3: Treebeard can be excused for his wooden acting. The entire Prequel cast can't. 4: Good in LotR means lovingkindness, consensual generosity, and work for the common benefit. Good in Star Wars means not shooting first. 5: Races in LotR have a deep history, complex biases and interactions, and each express their own languages, distinctions, and laws, none of which resemble those of any modern day humans. Races in SW may have different body types, but all conform to modern American cultural stereotypes and idiosyncracies. 6: The physical laws of LotR are constants with which the characters must contend or die. The physical laws of SW change from movie to movie, and are dispensed with upon a Lucasian whim, as when "the force" absurdly morphed into "midiclorians". 7: Those who complain that LOTR borrowed heavily from SW are like people who bitch and complain that the Kinks only do covers of Van Halen songs 8: The term 'Middle-Earth', when translated into Tolkien's Sindarin (Elvish), is 'Endor'.... Lucas' nod to the professer and inspiration for his saga 9: Even bland Orlando Bloom looks like a Method actor when put next to Hayden Christensen. And lastly... 10: LOTR is the SW for a new generation. Search your feelings, you know it to be true.....

  • May 15, 2005, 6:35 a.m. CST

    So jazzed about ep3 I made a parody song

    by johnnycrass

    download the mp3 at johnnycrass.com Warning: it's funny, but has a few spoilers!

  • May 15, 2005, 11 a.m. CST

    My Dad Can Beat Up Your Dad!

    by Darth Tater Tot

    That's what all of this whining SW vs. LOTR fighting sounds like. 9 year old boys arguing in the playground about who has the stronger daddy. In reality, both were weak bitches who couldn't even take their wives if they had to. PS But Goatzinger definitely wins in the "Made Me Laugh" department.

  • May 15, 2005, 11:01 a.m. CST

    KRULL Still Rules In the Kickass Department

    by Darth Tater Tot

    It just does.

  • May 15, 2005, 4:38 p.m. CST

    Politics from Lucas himself

    by pood

    http://movies.yahoo.com/mv/news/ap/20050515/111618582000.html sample >> "This is how liberty dies. With thunderous applause," bemoans Padme Amidala (Natalie Portman) as the galactic Senate cheers dictator-in-waiting Palpatine (Ian McDiarmid) while he announces a crusade against the Jedi. "If you're not with me, then you're my enemy," Hayden Christensen's Anakin soon to become villain Darth Vader tells former mentor Obi-Wan Kenobi (Ewan McGregor). The line echoes Bush's international ultimatum after the Sept. 11 attacks, "Either you are with us, or you are with the terrorists."

  • May 15, 2005, 6:05 p.m. CST

    LotR Vs. The Prequels: Name that trilogy!

    by Woody Tobias Jr

    Here's a fun game. I'll describe an epic trilogy of fantasy films, you tell me which one it is. Here are some clues. 1) This series suffers from an over dependance on sometimes dodgy effects. 2) These films include a numbingly tedious, uninvolving romantic subplot between actors who share no chemistry. 3) Much of this saga's considerable length is dedicated to people walking and talking. 4) Our heroes face vast digital armies of super easy to kill bad guys. 5) Awesomely powerful wizards do little particularly awesome with their powers. 6) Chris Lee is wasted. 7) Our heroes celebrate their triumph by jumping up and down in bed. 7) Epic battle scenes suffer from clutter and poor editing. 8) The 'Comic Relief' is neither. 9) The films are much longer than necessary and often slow to a crawl. 10) Generous helpings of super cool shit are mingled with the crap. 11) Whatever it's faults, it's still a hundred times better than 'The Matrix'.

  • May 16, 2005, 8:54 p.m. CST

    ILM

    by Flypaper

    I wish everyone would stop treading on ILM in favor of WETA. Let's face it...this is no mere 'Pepsi' vs. 'Coke' flavor preference. Truth be told, ILM was INVENTING the art and craft of modern visual effects when the kids at WETA were still in soggy diapers. 'Nuff said. Give the cinematic reverence and respect where it's rightfully due.

  • May 17, 2005, 10:51 p.m. CST

    Thanks Mr Lucas.

    by Bellock

    You have two reasons to hate me : I'm french and i've already seen Episode III. It's a hell of a beautiful film. I just can't accept it's the last Star Wars movie i'll ever discover on the big screen. Back in 1977, George was talking about four trilogies. Please George, tell us you haven't forgotten about the two others...

  • May 18, 2005, 7:02 a.m. CST

    Cheers Harry

    by Summer_Pudding

    Not a review as such, but a good read all the same. btw: what the fuck's happened to this place? Every other email seems to be a personal attack on Hazza. It's not on. Pud'

  • May 18, 2005, 1:42 p.m. CST

    Darth Vader and the New World Order

    by Jar Jar Boinks

    READ IT: http://www.infowars.com/articles/ps/darth_nwo.htm

  • May 18, 2005, 2:06 p.m. CST

    Revenge of the Sith mirrors reality

    by Yojimbo Jones

    The Star Wars story has had, without a question, the greatest impact on popular culture of any movie in world history. We will now explore why it has resonated so strongly with so many people across generations. - http://www.infowars.com/articles/ps/darth_nwo.htm

  • May 18, 2005, 3:08 p.m. CST

    LOL

    by Fugazi32

    Can't wait to see it! ---www.aintitcrap.cjb.net

  • May 18, 2005, 4:26 p.m. CST

    Why not Clone Anakin?

    by Ebullient

    Darth Vader is one of my favorite film characters of all time. That said, in the Star Wars DVD commentary Lucas explains that the Emperor wishes to replace Vader with Luke because the crippled body of the former, cybernetic suit notwithstanding, diminishes his ability to use the Force and hence, his value to the Emperor as a powerful pawn. However, if this is the case, why does the Emperor simply not obtain a genetic sample from Anakin following his defeat and clone him, rather than resurrect him in mechanical form? I hope ROTS, with its prevalent cloning theme, addresses this question.

  • May 19, 2005, 4:27 p.m. CST

    Where is Lucas's cameo?

    by warp11

    Sorry if this has already been answered, but where was Lucas in the film? I heard he had a cameo.

  • May 19, 2005, 4:29 p.m. CST

    So how can Anakin come back at the end of ROTJ like Obi Wan?

    by warp11

    If it took Obi Wan communicating with Qui Gon to be able to come back after death as a "force ghost", how does Anakin learn to do the same thing at the end of ROTJ? Warp 11, the really popular Star Trek band just came out with a great new song called "Your Evil Annie". It's is a funny hard rocking song about Anakin going evil! Check it: http://www.seriousmagic.com/_Karl/Evil%20Annie.mp3

  • May 19, 2005, 4:47 p.m. CST

    Spoiler

    by Masteel

    Thanks Harry. I don't agree with your politics, but this movie depressed me so F-ing much (mostly because of what happened with the Younglings, and who did it), this passage you wrote though, it helps. "This is why ultimately Luke Skywalker kicks ass. Because he doesn

  • May 19, 2005, 6:25 p.m. CST

    Harry... FUCKING SPOT ON MATE

    by just_hamish

  • May 19, 2005, 7:52 p.m. CST

    He raved about Episode II as well....

    by Rupee88

    "What Lucas has done, is to make a film that is so relentlessly entertaining and thrilling, that there will be no movie this summer that can stand against it. This is it. This movie is the real deal. It is smart, beautiful (god digital photography is the glory and the future of the world of film, the palette is strikingly dramatically colorful), thrilling and electrical. Essentially it is a pure action adventure science fiction fantasy with a touch of romance. Line up now. This Star Wars is for real."

  • May 19, 2005, 8:28 p.m. CST

    Just Seen It - Understand where ya coming from Harry

    by waggawagga

    That was one hell of an arse kicking mother fucking great film --- fuck all haters, go suck some hobbit cock all ya LOTR bitches. George please make the sequels.

  • May 20, 2005, 2:34 a.m. CST

    Star Wars-Revenge Of The Sith.A Painful Goodbye

    by coby

    Thats the end then of this saga, and it hurts so much.Why is there so many haters out there.It's time for us as true fans to stand together and agree we have just watched one of the greatest films ever made to the greatest saga that will ever be told.Lets go and see it again and again,lets take out Titanic once and for all.Please give this film a chance it deserves. MAY THE FORCE BE WITH ALL OF US "ALWAYS"

  • May 20, 2005, 1:34 p.m. CST

    My Two Cents

    by Rock Icon

    I saw it at the Arclight in Hollywood, that's the place to see it. The sound and the screen were amazing. As for the movie...holy shit. It was awesome. I wasn't at all prepared for how relentless the pace and momentum of the picture would be. This is Sci Fi on a whole other level.Ian's performance as Palpatine was incredibly intense, the scene were Anakin realizes the truth abouth about his identity was great. I loved the humor in the first act as well, it was so reminisent of the humor in ANH & Empire. R2 was hilarious (esp when it came that stupid intercom). I enjoyed the romantic scenes as well. They seemed totally in love and enamored with each other. There was so much in this movie it's hard to take it all in. Without a doubt the most thrilling of the Star Wars movies, or pretty much any movie. Hope you guys enjoy it as much as I did.

  • May 20, 2005, 2:13 p.m. CST

    Thankee, sai.

    by Je dead.

    Thanks Harry, for an amazing and alternative review of the last Star Wars film. You wrote with honesty, some raw emotion, and a bit of a punch against the system. Which is what alternative meant back in the days of New Hope and Empire. It's a shame that most of the civilized world will only get Roger Ebert's thumbsketch and the weekend box office reports. Mighty brave of you Harry to share your love of the modern world's greatest fable. And out come the wolves and weasels. One thing every web-head should remember is the amount of love, sweat, and belief that Lucas, the crew, and the cast put into completing this movie saga. I don't know about you but my accomplishments and realized dreams kinda pale in comparison. As long as there is electricity, Star Wars and Lord of the Rings will be watched and talked about. Which is a good thing. Because both these stories deal with fighting a totalitarian system. If this confuses or angers you, ask yourself why are all those left-wingers always facing the empire's storm troopers at protests against the WTO Trade Federation or Saruman's School of the Americas. We're living in a world where children are killed far more ruthlessly than by Anakin's hand. The reasoning remains the same. I'll be reading a slightly edited version of your review to my six year old boy, Harry. Yep, I'm a bad dad for taking my son to a violent, sad, and dark movie. To be honest, I didn't want to say No to the boy twenty times a day for the next two months. I knew the movie was going to shake him up and it did. He no longer wants to be Anakin. I believe the violence and values presented in the Star Wars saga will help guide him far better than any religion of absolutes. The world is always ripe for another Hitler or Palpatine or Sauron. It's up to you to fight or follow. May the force be with you.

  • May 20, 2005, 3:53 p.m. CST

    Harry can't you review a movie without

    by Quin the Eskimo

    letting your politics, which your absolutly are convinced are 100% correct (Palpatine)and review a movie that Republicans and Democrats both love and grew up on. Don't sully it by comparing our everyday reality to fantasy facism.

  • May 20, 2005, 4 p.m. CST

    and this is coming from a guy that really

    by Quin the Eskimo

    enjoys your reviews, though I'm still rooting around for a Magnolia review

  • May 20, 2005, 4:01 p.m. CST

    And if the Jedi

    by Quin the Eskimo

    really don't believe in absoulutes why was the dark side absoulutly forbidden?

  • May 21, 2005, 7:15 a.m. CST

    No complaints here.

    by Tony fucknuts

    Well, just saw it last night, and i reckon its everything you could ask for. Possibly the most cinematic thing i've ever seen. I suppose that some fans will be pissed off that its not the version they've had in their minds for the last 20 years or so, but in the end, its not your vision and it never was. Lucas wraps up the story perfectly, and if a couple of gammy lines from minor characters or if Vader doesn't act like you think he should is enough to take you out of the story, then fuck off and write your own. Why can't people just enjoy films anymore, instead of rabidly picking out plotholes so they can knock the film on talkbacks? I don't know...

  • May 21, 2005, 8:16 a.m. CST

    You tell 'em, Gym!

    by BurnHollywood

  • May 21, 2005, 8:20 a.m. CST

    You tell 'em, Gym!

    by BurnHollywood

    The movie passed the big three tests: *** 1)My bladder was ready to burst when I left the theater *** 2) I was more tnan a little emotionally fucked up fifteen minutes afterwards *** 3)One hour afterwards, I was still analyzing what I'd just seen... *** Fanboys of the world, STFU or give respect!

  • May 21, 2005, 8:37 a.m. CST

    ComandoCody

    by Alatar_Blue

    If you don't get: "How the fuck did a boring bio like GANDI beat E.T". Then you're stuck at an emotional age of about 14. A point of view as ludicrous as that renders any other 'contribution' you might make to these boards entirely inconsequential. Time to step away from the keyboard now little boy. Doesn't matter how old you are chronologically, you have the sensibilities of a child.

  • May 21, 2005, 9:14 a.m. CST

    http://wizbangblog.com/images/2005/darth_leia_coloring_book.php

    by Trevor Goodchild

    http://www.leiasmetalbikini.com/members/whatsnew.html

  • May 21, 2005, 9:37 a.m. CST

    Aww come off it EARTH...

    by Pontsing Barset

    ... we all know you don't REALLY have a girlfriend! The inflatable bitch over there in the corner don't count you know. You just want to impress the big boys right? Never you mind little fella it'll be ok. Now be a good boy and go jerk off to your Natalie Portman portfolio and let the adults talk.

  • May 21, 2005, 11:36 a.m. CST

    Oooh you sure showed me Earth

    by Pontsing Barset

    You're an even bigger jackass than your: "Girlfriend post" would indicate. I await your next oration with bated breath! I'm always up for a good larf at some cretin's expense. More MORE!

  • May 21, 2005, 1:26 p.m. CST

    Fathers...

    by Shish Kabob

    I identify with you in regards to seeing these movies with my father.

  • May 21, 2005, 4:06 p.m. CST

    test

    by collapse

  • May 21, 2005, 4:23 p.m. CST

    what about Qui gon Jinn?

    by collapse

    Okay then, I'm French so this is sure to get me some hate replies on the talkback. I don't know where to start. Well, I guess my first impression of ROTS is that it's not a very good movie. I mean If it were a movie, it's actually part of that big saga thing. Right. So I'll statr with what should be the core of whatever i'm trying to say here: Qui Gon is Anakin's "father", he created him, actually whan Palps talks about Darth Plagueis, he's talking about that incredibly wise (?) Sith Master that was able to manipulate the force so he wa able to actually create life and become immortal. Right, Qui Gon is not Plagueis, he's the "Good side" Force guy who was able to do just that. Ma,; I do feel frustrated not to see Qui Gon appear on that starship and say Hi to everyone and reassure us, but at the same time I feel relieved Obi Wan was not all alone on Tatooine, that he was actually sharing some wisdom with his old master. Let's say Qui Gon, our maverick Jedi, was actually the only one of the religious establishment on Corruscant who had kept his ways. Yes indeed, why the fuck are the jedi trying to seize power from the Chancellor? Is this really they job ?(is this really Windu's job???). Okay then. let's say the much maligned Midichlorians were not mentioned in AOTC for a reason (and that is not to appease fans), they were not mentioned because the jedi couldn't care less about the whole shit, they just really enjoyed sitting in a big circle to bask in how WISE they were? What if Qui Gon had thought, man, these guys are just not Jedi anymore, I'm gonna create my own prophecy boy and get this galaxy a clean slate, A Luke Skywalker that can feel desire (for his own sister, c'mon Qui Gon), dress in blmack, throw some guy off a speeder and not think twice about it. It's quite obvious that Darth Vader IS the one who bring balance to the Force (the twins: a secular politician and a Jedi... the old republic embodied by two children). Anyway. I've got to see this again beause on the whole I didn't think the execution in ROTS was that great. Overall, now that we can see that whole first trilogy as one big piece (of ??), I'd say Qui Gonn is the one that put this whole thing in motion, and Liam Neeson's performancecertainly validates that.

  • May 22, 2005, 7:38 a.m. CST

    loved this film

    by catanga

    great film, great moments, great performances - sure to grow in stature

  • May 22, 2005, 1:13 p.m. CST

    millenium falcon?

    by MartyfromWales

    hi guys, just going to see rots again, 2nd time tonight, and as i missed the falcon last time around was wondering what part of the film it was? also are there any other cool things that i should watch out for? thanks and in my opinion this film is AWESOME! " YOU WERE THE CHOSEN ONE!!" just sent shivers down my spine! class!

  • May 22, 2005, 9:31 p.m. CST

    Good Review

    by jonleeus

    No shit, that was meaningful and,though I hate to admit it...touching for A guy my age(30!!).Good Luck to us all,the world has moved on.

  • May 22, 2005, 11:26 p.m. CST

    "Sith" is... good.

    by Diskatopia

    But dreary. I know it has to be a tragedy overall, but great tragedies always have a little comic relief, to rev up the emotions rather than letting them spiral down. "Sith" started becoming so dreary, I pined for JarJar for a laugh. And that's screwy weird... but imagine how the audience would have roared, say, if JarJar walked up to Obi Wan, Obi asks him what's up, and JarJar hands Obi a note, which Obi reads aloud: "Meesa lost my voice..." etc.). Lucas has generally always been great at epic story and poor at tight script, and "Sith" shows that again ... I left the theater after "Sith" feeling weary rather than wired, tired rather than teary. But in the end, I feel it is ... good.

  • May 22, 2005, 11:28 p.m. CST

    Don't let the bastards grind you down, Harry

    by Carlo

    I'm shocked at the negative responses to Harry's review. What I love about this website is that the reviewers acknowledge themselves and their emotions and point of view in their reviews. It makes all the difference in your enjoyment of a movie. I just caught a 5:30 showing of ROTS today. It's now 11:30, and I'm still feeling jittery. I've even eaten, come home, and been intimate with the wife (who also loved the movie). Yet what I'm thinking about is still this story. I still have a sinking feeling in my stomach, that started about 45 minutes into the movie and hasn't stopped yet. It is that moving / disturbing / satisfying. And I am not even as into the story as many others. I've never read the books or other pulp. I was old enough to remember seeing Jedi in the theater at about age 5 or 6, but not the others. But I did have a legacy of merchandise, from bedsheets to action figures, handed down from elder siblings. This story has been a part of my worldview for as long as I had consciousness. Now at the age of 27 it is complete. I didn't really think it would hit me like this. I was as disappointed with the first two as all the rest of you. But this one was good enough to make up for it. I will watch A New Hope as soon as I get a chance, and all of episodes 4-6 will forever seem different now. Lucas has masterfully told the tale of a tragic rise, fall, and redemption of a character in a tale as powerful as any myth or story of our time, even if he struck out on some major and minor elements along the way.

  • May 23, 2005, 7:34 a.m. CST

    Reveng of the Sith

    by Dhin

    While I share many of the sentaments about this bing the end of an era and how much it hurts to see that, I felt robbed after seeing this one. I knew it wouldn't be the master piece that I have imaged since my boyhood. I was left feeling hurt that Lucas cared more about the specal effects than the story. The story wasn't this movies strong point, now like it was in the orignal 3 movie. Effects for their times were good, but it was all about the story, her the story seemed to only be a side though.

  • May 23, 2005, 9:08 a.m. CST

    Attacks on Harry

    by Starling577

    Harry, you have had a fair number of opinions that didn't mirror my own, but my hat is off to you for not exploding at some of the personal attacks here. Perhaps if: A. Your attackers had coherent points of view and B. They knew how to express themselves, they wouldn't need to pretend your opinions are mortal wounds they must avenge. You know, when I look up a piece on YOUR site, it doesn't surprise me to see YOUR opinions; What does surprise me is that this comes as a shock to people who should know better.

  • May 23, 2005, 2:07 p.m. CST

    Thanks Harry

    by SaintDilbert

    Saw ROTS Saturday night, waited until after to read any reviews. You nailed it Harry. No one was there for little Anikan. Too bad, now millions die, including the younglings. This was a fitting end to the films and feeds beautifully into ANH. I loved it.

  • May 24, 2005, 4:51 a.m. CST

    Will this end the debate as to wether this is a political allego

    by TonyWilson

    going to rip you to shreds so shut the hell up and take it like men. http://film.guardian.co.uk/cannes2005/story/0,15927,1484795,00.html

  • May 24, 2005, 7:23 a.m. CST

    ROTS Haters make Darth Sidious angry

    by fanb0y

    Once again PT lovers will rule the talkback. Do what must be done, do not hestiate, show no mercy. Every single prequel hater is now an ENEMY of starwars fandom. I want you to goto the hater's houses and fuck them, fuck them up their stupid asses, it is the only way to generate enough fanboy power to save ROTS's box office takings from the nitpickers.

  • May 24, 2005, 4:07 p.m. CST

    WE WERE CHEATED! WHERE WAS HE?

    by PsarevoOmorfia

    GRANDOOOOOOOOOOOO

  • May 24, 2005, 5:32 p.m. CST

    blind geek loyalty

    by Moonrocks

    You know, I was 13 when Star Wars came out. I was just as captivated by the original three as the next person. But good fucking christ am I glad that it's over and it will not come back until, say, George Lucas dies. I am sorry, but I can't get all exited over these last (first) three films. The first was such a betrayal of everything Star Wars was that these last two felt just like any other blockbuster sci-fi whatevers. You want the truth about Star Wars I-III? Here it is. Lucas can't direct, he can't write dialogue, and he's so wrapped up in his little FX-riddled world and so out of the studio system that he can't see the problems, and no one can tell him what's wrong. I was a kid at 13 when I saw Star Wars. Now, I'm an adult, and my standards are higher, sure. But I will say this: if I-III had just been fun like the others, if they had likeable characters, if they weren't so plodding, I would feel differently. Good bye, new Star Wars films.... ...and good riddance....

  • May 24, 2005, 6:52 p.m. CST

    Victory for the Sith? I don't think so!

    by keeflamb

    It registered to me after seeing Sith for the second time(and reading it a second time for that matter) that the Jedi do manage to come away part victorious. Of course i am talking about posterity here. But it is Yoda who tells Obi-Wan to train on Tatooine to learn to commune with his old master. This must mean that Qui-Gon learned posthumously how to cheat death...by the giving up of self(which is a story I would love to hear). A victory because that is precisely the reason why Anakin took that fatal step into the Dark Side...to learn to cheat death. And in his and his master's ignorance never come to understand the reason why this skill is unattainable. Yoda understands that he has failed, but he also understands that this is a "trick" the Sith could never learn! Yes the Sith take over the galaxy...big whoops...Hitler had his reign too! But it is ultimately the Jedi who learn to "become more powerful than you can possibly imagine!" The doom of the Sith is that the things they desire most can never be obtained through desire! Absolute power corrupts absolutely!

  • May 24, 2005, 7:14 p.m. CST

    Lucas is a HACKER!

    by Darth_Cracker

    it just occured to me. a hacker is someone who uses unconventional means to accomplish a goal. someone with a slightly different insight to go through, beyond, or around the system, to achieve his intention. i think the only reason may people are saying ROTS was as good as they say they do (I just read Harry's teary review of how good closure was, and that it was everything he had hoped for and more... bah)... is because what the _fans_ bring to it. The movie itself was skeletal. Bare bones, waiting to be filled in by the feelings the audience had for the characters... and it succeeds in this way. So, basically, Lucas cheated. He created a masterpiece only by the phenomenon of Star Wars popular culture, which has been essentially an American religion of sorts... it's an experience... not because this installment was any good on its own... bad dialogue, bad plot, bad acting... corny SFX... Lucas got his money's worth (many times over) and delivered an opus to the masses... by using the masses themselves... Thus, Lucas is a hacker. The end.

  • May 24, 2005, 8:10 p.m. CST

    the prophecy that will bring balance to the force :

    by this_is_the_pope

    In 20 years, Jorj will realize that he's got nothing going for him other than star wars and he's going to sit his jabba-like jowels down to write Episodes 7-9. Since Empire Strikes Back, this man had become consumed by the dark side, steeping lower everytime to smear hate across stories once loved in the known world. Deeper he dug, in the prequels, plumbing beneath the depths of the volcanic planet that had once consumed Anakin, and even lower yet will he dig when he sits to pen the sequels. But there is hope. For little known to him, a son hidden by Marcia Lucas in the African continent will come back and strike Lucas down in Skywalker Ranch, setting his body ablaze in non ILM-treated flames and pick up the mantle to remake the prequels as they should have.

  • May 25, 2005, 5:28 a.m. CST

    Hey Guys, Wanna see the Vader "NOO!!!" replaced in ROTS??

    by RIVERO

    Then Sign the Petition!: http://www.petitiononline.com/aunycxvc/petition.html

  • May 25, 2005, 2:33 p.m. CST

    "WHAT SORT OF FUCKING JEDI WISDOM IS THAT SHIT YODA??? "

    by Right Bastard

    It's called Buddhism, Harry. I finally saw the movie last night. It's interesting to read all these spoiler filled reviews that I skipped.

  • May 25, 2005, 2:41 p.m. CST

    What was up with all the Harry attacks?

    by Right Bastard

    Now that I've read HK's review, why were everone attacking him about his politics. He made one passing reference to Karl Rove, and that was about it. What? We're not supposed to make political comments in political movies? Gez, I guess the Anakin W. Bush hit a little too close to home for some people.

  • May 25, 2005, 3:57 p.m. CST

    ROTS

    by gdkzen

    Take a look at by blog @ http://gdkzen.blogspot.com for my extended opinion on the attachment issue as it pertains to Anakin and Luke. That being said - Yoda was right. BTW - to all those who said that Yoda would get his ass kicked - it looked pretty much like a stalemate to me. Sid's was lucky to walk out of there alive.

  • May 25, 2005, 5:16 p.m. CST

    Thank God.

    by cynibun

    I hear that Hayden Christensen is quiting acting!!!!!!!!!!! He wants to be an architect. You see there is a God. I knew it. This is proof. I hope George "Whore" Lucas is through taking the known world for every penny he can now. Maybe Ewan McGregor can begin acting again, and bad jedi M.F. Samuel Jackson can too. Hmmmmm, movie multi-tasked, methinks. Sucked and blew it did.

  • May 26, 2005, 4:13 p.m. CST

    By the way...

    by thespius19

    I saw Sith. Awful. Absolutely awful. And I went in with LOW expectations. Ah, well. At least we won't have to suffer through another one of these again.

  • Just what did you expect him to say? "Come 'ere, I'll bite yer kneecaps off!"

  • May 26, 2005, 9:50 p.m. CST

    LAST!

    by Gus Nukem

  • May 27, 2005, 11:40 a.m. CST

    THE BIG EPISODE III REVEAL NONE IS TALKING ABOUT

    by Darth Hall

    Hey all, For the record, I loved Sith. It was far from perfect, but it was a damn fine Star Wars movie. Anyway, something quick. I hear a lot of people talking about their hopes for a "Luke I am your father" type of revelation in Sith that never came, but maybe it did. Didn't Paplatine practially come out and say that he created Anakin using the force? He hinted at it. Just because he didn't flat out say it doesn't make it not true. Is that not like a big REVEAL!! The Emperor is Vader's father!! Luke's grandfather!! That's seems pretty freakin big to me. Any thoughts?

  • May 27, 2005, 12:03 p.m. CST

    REVENGE OF THE SITH TALKBACK #3

    by Colonel_Blimp

    S'il vous plait.

  • May 27, 2005, 1:51 p.m. CST

    New Yorker review of SW

    by synapsE

    Jackasses Have you reade the the review by antohony lane in the New Yorker (Jew Yorker?). He rips star wars a new asshole (I guess Lucas is the old asshole). 2nd favorite line (paraphrase). What kind of civilization has people using starships to go from star system to star system but a woman does not get an ultrasound and find out she has twins until she delivers? 1st (on Yoda spekaing like a tourist using a phrase book...) Break me a fucking give!! BTW I like the movie but it is interesting to sometimes read a real review.

  • May 27, 2005, 2:15 p.m. CST

    Do you think the Emporer ever regrets his decision to back Vader

    by WeedyMcSmokey

    I mean, here's a guy who took twenty-odd years to plot, plan and execute the biggest deception in the history of the galaxy so he could create and nurture this supposed supreme apprentice and the first mission he sends him on, the fucker gets all his limbs chopped off and has to be put into a giant black (admittedly cool-looking) iron lung. I mean, all that work, all this talent, and the fucker can't keep track of his damn legs.

  • May 27, 2005, 2:30 p.m. CST

    "using starships to go from star system to star system but a wom

    by Right Bastard

    LOL, that was great. There are a lot of odd things about the SW galaxy. I always wondered why they were in these flimsy cockpits with thin glass windows, and no one thinks (except for the TIE fighter pilots) to wear...oh...say...an oxygen mask? A space suit? Eh, it's Star Wars, not Star Trek. It's always been closer to fantasy than science fiction. That's why it's "long ago and far away" rather than "4000 years in the future".

  • May 27, 2005, 3:52 p.m. CST

    Seriously

    by poopfacebastard

    If any more of you sweaty smelly fruits says Revenge of the Sith is better than Empire or even votes it better than New Hope I will gouge out your eyes and skull fuck you hard

  • May 27, 2005, 8:19 p.m. CST

    Would Padme have died had Anakin not turned to the Dark Side?

    by CertifiedTHX

    Someone may have brought this up already; I've not read all the Talkback posts. Consider this a moment. Anakin was having those disturbing visions of Padme dying in childbirth. No explanation was given as to what was going to cause her death, only that she would not survive. It was his fear of losing her, and the promise of Palpatine that he would actually be able to fight off death's grip on her, that ultimately led to his turning to the Dark Side. But then we learn from the medical droid at the end that Padme has lost her will to live. We know from her encounter with Anakin on Mustafar that her heart has been decimated. And Anakin has come close to killing her. She's realized that the Anakin she once knew and loved is gone. Her life has been as good as destroyed. She doesn't care to go on. Perhaps this is what Anakin was actually tapping into when he had his visions. Perhaps it is Anakin's turn to the Dark Side, and the horrific aftermath of that choice, that ultimately takes Padme's life, rather than complications during child birth, as seemed to be implied.

  • May 27, 2005, 11:52 p.m. CST

    going from empire

    by Right Bastard

    "Always uncertain is the future." Yoda said that there was too much emotion involved. That's why when Luke saw Han and Leia in pain, he didn't know what was up, or if they would die. Did Anakin see her dying, or did he just see her in pain and assume she was dying? If he didn't turn, I think she probably would have lived. That whole "dying of a broken heart" thing was kind of weak, though, in my opinion. 1) Padme was supposed to be strong minded and probably knew from day one that the relationship would never last (a monk and a politician?) 2) this is my continuity problem. Leia says that she remembered her mom, and she was always sad. Why would Organa's wife be all distant and sad? I would have thought that Padme would live, and hook up with Organa, but Lucas screwed went a different direction with it.

  • May 28, 2005, 2:10 a.m. CST

    Lingering question about Dooku. Please respond

    by Pop-it-Tommy

    So I can't figure out why in AOTC Dooku revealed to Obi-wan that the sith were in control of the senate, and why he asked Obi-wan to join him to "destroy the sith." What was that all about? As Palpatine's apprentice, why would dooku reveal anything before the plan was all set and why would he want obi-wan to join him to destroy the sith (if he himself was in line to be a sith master)? Was he going behind Palpatine's back? It just doesn't make sense and it wasn't cleared up in ROTS. Let me know what you all think. Later.

  • May 28, 2005, 11:32 a.m. CST

    Dooku&#39;s Ultimatum, Pop-It-Tommy

    by splatpnk

    The Sith are backstabbers. All of them. Sith do not like to "share" power. Dooku was just another Jedi with dissatisfactions with the Republic Sidious was able to twist for his own ends while he continued to groom Anakin for the Jedi purge. Dooku was doing what Vader did later, in EMPIRE, and even hinted at a little in SITH. A plan to overthrow Sidious. You can assume Sidious was privy to Dooku&#39;s intentions -- look what happens to him in the opening of SITH. You can also look at that scene as Palpatine&#39;s final test to see how vulnerable Anakin was to suggestibility. Dooku&#39;s plan certainly could have been to sway Obi-Wan to the Dark Side, kill Sidious, and rule the galaxy with Obi-Wan as his new apprentice. All the while continuing to obey Darth Sidious until the right possible time.

  • May 28, 2005, 1:39 p.m. CST

    question, can anyone please hlep?

    by darlingsasha

    What does Padme say to Obi Wan just before she dies? I could not make it out and it&#39;s bothering me...sorry! Also, I felt really bad for Anakin, and I didn&#39;t like that Obi Wan turned his back to him while Anakin was being burned alove...Anakin was obviously unbalanced and overtaken by his own paranoya, he did not have an evil spirit he was just truly "lost", he could have been helped, still...I kind of lost respect for Obi Wan at that point

  • May 28, 2005, 3:02 p.m. CST

    darlingsasha

    by Ribbons

    "There&#39;s still some good in him."

  • May 28, 2005, 3:06 p.m. CST

    Wow

    by Ribbons

    I appreciate this review for its POV, but it seemed almost angry. I actually liked it though. Not exactly a "review" as much as a reaction to the movie, but it was a differing perspective, nonetheless. People: there are like, a kajillion reviews of &#39;RotS&#39; out there right now. I don&#39;t understand why you get mad at Harry for not writing a conventional one. If anything I prefer it as it&#39;s different. For people who apparently have no respect for Harry, you sure wanna hear him critique movies an awful lot...or maybe it&#39;s the "principle" of the thing. Okay, whatever.

  • May 28, 2005, 3:22 p.m. CST

    thanks splatpnk

    by Pop-it-Tommy

    Yeah, that makes sense I guess. You wonder why any sith would want an apprentice then, since eventually they all try to kill their masters (a necessary evil I suppose, since they know that the dark side has to be taught and kept alive). Also, to answer darlingsasha&#39;s question, I thought Padme was about to say "there&#39;s still...hope." This would make a nice seque into A New Hope. That was my impression.

  • May 28, 2005, 4:37 p.m. CST

    "they all try to kill their masters "

    by Right Bastard

    This goes back to all the samurai and kung fu movies that Lucas was inspired by. The master always has to die. It happens for the good guys too, but differently. Quigon died, and Obi takes charge. Obi dies and Luke takes charge. Yoda dies when Luke&#39;s training is complete. Pai Mei dies and Uma learns the super-kill-death-whatever technique.

  • May 28, 2005, 5:54 p.m. CST

    New Yorker review of SW

    by fanb0y

    That New Yorker reviewer is just another prequel hater who instictively nitpicks without even looking for answers within the film itself. Obviously Padme is keeping the pregnancy a secret, why would she go and get an ultrasound and have her pregnancy known and recorded by a doctor. Idiots.

  • May 28, 2005, 11:42 p.m. CST

    "Into hiding we must go..."

    by darth kubrick

    Great idea Yoda. Way to face your fears! See you in 20 years!

  • May 29, 2005, 9:12 a.m. CST

    Harry&#39;s quivering lip

    by Caerdwyn

    After reading Harry&#39;s review and seeing Ep III, I can safely say that ol&#39; Knowles put more emotion into his recap than Lucas did into his movie. Honestly. Harry gushes, rides a turbulent wave of highs and lows, cheers and let-downs... he fills in where Lucas left out. I&#39;m sure Harry thought Padme&#39;s stirring "Anakin, you&#39;re breaking my HEART!" was a performance for the ages. Me, I just groaned. And groaned. And groaned. This flick was best when nobody was talking. Scratch that, the emperor had some good lines despite his ultra-cheese moment with Windu. Lucas can craft a decent story, but he cannot CANNOT direct.

  • May 29, 2005, 10:40 a.m. CST

    Answers to Many of Your Questions (SPOILERS)

    by DeeJay

    REGARDING the ultrasound/twins issue, this is resolved by simply paying attention to the film. The Emperor mentions that Sith--- through their evil magic--- can create life. Vader had already shown Proteus-like tendencies, as we can see with him having "created" C3PO. Leia the "baby" became twins in the midst of Anakin&#39;s emotional turmoil, his intense love for Padme created a second child. This is why all were surprised to learn of twins... and is tied to why Padme died. Their emotional bond led her to essentially sacrifice her life energy for the 2nd child and Anakin himself. Palpatine never did identify the hidden price of using this magic. THERE was another question about why the Emperor didn&#39;t clone Anakin. Simply put, he was trying to exercise all 48 laws of power on the boy. When Palpatine gave him the gift of new legs, an arm and a bigger body, he further indebted Skywalker to him. WITH the question about why these advance people didn&#39;t have space suits, one can draw an analogy to the fact that not everyone who rides a luxury liner at sea keeps a deep sea diving suit in their cabin. There are always restrictions based on budgets and practicality. ABOUT Vader&#39;s child being on Tatooine; after the death of his mother, he had no desire to go back to that planet... and it also was a planet that demonstrated a certain resistance to some powers of the force (demonstrated in some of its native creatures such as Watto and Jabba). This made the planet a sufficient (although probably not the best) hiding place for *both* Luke and Obi Wan. CLOSER attention to the film explains a few other things, as well (such as the true source of Anakin&#39;s visions), just as each of the earlier films do (for instance, Episode One indirectly explained why the Jedi used light sabers instead of guns). By the way--- I only saw ROTS once, and think that these things can easily be seen if one approaches it with a fairly open mind.

  • May 29, 2005, 11:51 a.m. CST

    fanb0y...get a clue

    by synapsE

    First, the reviewer for the New Yorker is a Pultizer prize nominated columnist who previously wrote on international politics for the new york times. As hard as it might be to imagine in your masturbation filled world, he does not care nearly as much about the "star wars universe" as you do, you pathetic fuck. I brought it up as an example of a real person writing a genuine review about these movies. Not some self-indulgent 13 yr old (if not in chronological at least in mental age) twit who does not even get the movie he defends. Do you think the former Queen of Naboo could not get a tech to do her ultrasound with out having a docotor know? How about the jazillion of robot/doctors in the movies that can conevniently have their memory wiped like the gay golden butler C3P0 you idiot? Also, dont let simple reason get in the way of your argument numbnuts, in the real world ultra-sounds are also done just to check the health of the baby not just to see the number of babies in the uterus (that&#39;s a part of a woman jackass....and women are the things that dont ever speak to you...). Anthony Lane&#39;s point is dont "look for answers in the film itself" because this is made up shit made up to make money. oh and also to confuse idiots like yourself...

  • May 29, 2005, 1:32 p.m. CST

    Was That REALLY Necessary?

    by DeeJay

    synapsE... I can understand you disagreeing with fanbOy, but was that really necessary? Your passion is cool, but we don&#39;t need another flame war. The point made in the film was that the second child was conceived magically (remember the robot doctors stating that their science couldn&#39;t explain what was happening with Padme?). Now, I tend to think that the use of magic as a film explanation is a copout, but I also understand how that was a component of the story. Ultimately, the film critic from the New Yorker seems to have missed a detail. That doesn&#39;t make him a hack (consider that the alchemists of old got most of what they thought to be "fact" incorrect... but were still the most brilliant minds of their day). It just means that, on the point you cited, he was wrong. Speaking of wrong, I meant to write Prometheus-like (not Proteus-like) in my earlier post...

  • May 29, 2005, 3:48 p.m. CST

    Prometheus

    by Ribbons

    Isn&#39;t Prometheus the Titan who brings fire to man? I&#39;m not sure what that has to do with creating life...

  • May 30, 2005, 5:02 a.m. CST

    I loved it!

    by Fugazi32

    Awesome...

  • May 30, 2005, 9:16 a.m. CST

    test

    by djtrauma

  • May 30, 2005, 9:24 a.m. CST

    Chronology Question!

    by djtrauma

    Hello , can someone shed some light on this quandary: at the end of ROTS, we see Darth Vader and Palpatine on the bridge of a Proto Star Destroyer overseeing the construction of the Death Star. My "problem" with this is that WHY DOES IT TAKES 18-ODD YEARS TO FINISH THAT BATTLE STATION??? I mean, can&#39;t they build a bit faster...they constructed a complete fleet in around three years...thats my only big problem with ROTS, its a Star Wars movie with some stupid moments, as opposed to a stupid movie with Star Wars moments (ie Phantom Menace) So, if anyone could shed some light on this....? thank you MTFBWTY

  • May 30, 2005, 11:27 a.m. CST

    Prometheus & Death Star

    by DeeJay

    Ribbons... in most unabriged versions of the mythology, Prometheus actually forged man of mud (or clay) some time before giving man fire. Djtrauma... the Death Star piece bothered me, as well. Especially since Death Star #2 now seems to have taken significantly less time to build than the first one. My only guess would be that the Trade Federation and Count Dooku lost the much-needed schematics in their deaths, but I don&#39;t think that adequately explains a nearly 18-year delay...

  • May 30, 2005, 1:02 p.m. CST

    possible DEATH STAR explanation

    by Right Bastard

    This really bugged my girlfriend. With so many other inconsistancies, it didn&#39;t bug me too much. I would say, it probably didn&#39;t take 18 years to finish. But, if you are overthrowing a government and declairing yourself as Emperor, it&#39;s probably a lot easier to get the masses behind you if you keep the fact that you&#39;ve developed the ultimate weapon of mass distruction a Secret. Once Palpatine dissolved the Senate (in the beginning of Star Wars) there was no longer any reason to keep the Death Star a secret. At that point, he had ultimate power, and a big enough military to back him up. Damn those rebel terrorists!!!

  • May 30, 2005, 1:02 p.m. CST

    possible DEATH STAR explanation

    by Right Bastard

    This really bugged my girlfriend. With so many other inconsistancies, it didn&#39;t bug me too much. I would say, it probably didn&#39;t take 18 years to finish. But, if you are overthrowing a government and declairing yourself as Emperor, it&#39;s probably a lot easier to get the masses behind you if you keep the fact that you&#39;ve developed the ultimate weapon of mass distruction a Secret. Once Palpatine dissolved the Senate (in the beginning of Star Wars) there was no longer any reason to keep the Death Star a secret. At that point, he had ultimate power, and a big enough military to back him up. Damn those rebel terrorists!!!

  • May 30, 2005, 5:55 p.m. CST

    ANOTHER possible Death Star explanation

    by J-Dizzle

    Right Bastard raises a good point, however I would like to add a theory of my own. Since the original Death Star was the first weapon of it&#39;s kind, it probably had to go through several phases of experimentation. Trying to build something that huge for the first time and making it work properly would realistically take about some 20 odd years. Heck, most of us have trouble writing and making a simple computer program to work in a few short hours. As for the second Death Star, once you&#39;ve finally made something work for the first time, building a copy of it would considerably take less amount of time than before.

  • May 30, 2005, 8:41 p.m. CST

    No one said that the second Death Star was build after TESB

    by Mugato

    It could have begun construction right after ROTS. That would explain why it took so long, not that 18 years seems long to me. Especially as someone else said, they were also building a Star Destroyer fleet, which most likely had precedence.

  • May 31, 2005, 1:47 a.m. CST

    synapsE & Anthony Lane: hot new hater couple

    by fanb0y

    Charming to the last. You don&#39;t know how hard I found it, signing the order to flame you. synapsE, before your destruction by fanboy power, I would like you to be my guest at a ceremony that will make this talkback operational. No hater will dare oppose Lucas&#39;s vision now. (PrincessSynapseOrgana): The more you tighten your griptalk, the more childhoods will slip through your fingers. (MoffFanb0y) Not after we demonstrate the power of these SW quotes...in a way, you have determined the choice of the anti-ROTS reviewer to be flamed first. Since you are reluctant to provide us with legitimate plot holes in ROTS (choosing instead to whine about ultrasounds)I have chosen to direct this fanboy flamewar&#39;s destructive power on your favorite movie, Battlefield Earth. (PrincessSynapseOrgana): nooo, Battlefield was a bomb we have no plot or critical acclaim at all. (MoffFanb0y): Then you have a another target, a legitimate plothole aside from the gaping one in your brain? Then name the system. I grow tired of asking this so it will be the last time, where is the relevancy of Lane&#39;s having a pulitzer in politics to his inept review of a fantasy movie? (PrincessSynapseOrgana) in TPM...the sw flaws are on TPM...(MoffFanboy) there you see Lord Krullboy, synapse can be reasonable...continue with the operation, you may flame when ready. (PrincessSynapseOrgana) WHAT! (MoffFanboy): your far too trusting...TPM is far too critically panned to be worth defending in a ROTS talkback, but don&#39;t worry, we&#39;ll deal with your hater friends soon enough....**COMMENCE PRIMARY IGNITION...(deathstar shoots and destorys alderaaan) (MinasTirithII sits down) (CocolopezStarwalker): Are you all right...whats wrong? (MinasTirithII): I feel a great disturbance in the talkback, as if millions of whiny hater voices suddenly cried out in terror and were silenced...i fear something terrible has happened...you better get on with your sauron cock-ring exercises.

  • May 31, 2005, 2:52 a.m. CST

    LMAO fanb0y.....

    by Xeno Skywalker

    My midiclorians were influenced to guide me to this TB. I will do anything you ask...just help me to save the TB&#39;s. The TB&#39;s are relentless...

  • May 31, 2005, 3:13 a.m. CST

    Xeno Skywalker...

    by fanb0y

    To save the TB&#39;s, is a power only one has achieved but if we work together, I know we can discover its secret. (XenoSkywalker): I pledge my self to your quotations (DarthFanboyis): Goooood....the QUOTES are SSSSSTRONG with you....a powerful fanboy you will become...henceforth you will be known as....Xeno.......Skywalker...RISE! Because the AICN Jedi Council did not trust you my young apprentice, I beleive you are the only fanboy with knowledge of this plot. If the haters learn what has transpired here, they will flame us...along with all the fanboys. (XenoWalker): I agree, the haters next move will be against the fanboys. (DarthFanboyis): Every single hater, including your friend, Obi-Wan Haternobi, is now an enemy of fandom. The haters are relentless, if they are not all destroyed it will be flamewar without end. First, I want you to flame haters even in the Non-SW talbacks..it will catch them off balance....DO WHAT MUSST BE DONE, Lord XenoSkywalker, DO NOT HESTIATE, SHOW NO MERCY, only then will you be strong enough in fandom to save the TB&#39;s.

  • May 31, 2005, 5:54 a.m. CST

    death star construction time

    by Colonel_Blimp

    Right bastard, I&#39;m pretty sure the only reason palpatine was able to dissolve the senate was BECAUSE the death star was operational, so I think it not likely that the completed DS had been hangin around in hiding for a couple of decades. Mugato and jsadighi, your points are good. One can also take into consideration that the construction was delayed because it had to be made in hiding (which I assume the ROTJ one didn&#39;t have to be), and also because, since it was a prototype, the technology/tools/machinery used to construct it would also have to be invented and tried out. Much like ANH compared to ESB - the effects for ESB were easier and quicker to make than ANH because ILM had to invent the tech before they could start on the actual work on ANH.

  • May 31, 2005, 4:18 p.m. CST

    Yeah...capitalism!!

    by Quin the Eskimo

    And if my earlier post was percieved as the hate Harry kind I apoligize. I like the dude but I feel as if he occasionaly belittles the right as if there not valid or something.

  • May 31, 2005, 4:30 p.m. CST

    The New Yorker Review

    by JeeBus

    synapsE, the New Yorker review is not so different from reviews here on AICN, it&#39;s just that it&#39;s from the opposite end of the spectrum. Anthony Lane, in his review, was very biased because he just hates Star Wars in general. His biased opinion came to light in only the first paragraph where he mentioned how Tolkien&#39;s work is more creative then SW (see his comparison to how &#39;orc&#39; sounds better than &#39;sith&#39;). From that point he continued to tear apart ROTS, mentioning his odd contempt for Yoda. He also nitpicked at small details that, you will find, most &#39;genuine&#39; reviews don&#39;t even bother to mention because such details are not very important to the purpose of fair film reviews. Therefore, I advise you to seek out a more fair review if this is what you require because despite Anthony Lane&#39;s wonderful credentials in the political landscape, he ultimately has provided a pretty shitty review of ROTS.

  • May 31, 2005, 4:30 p.m. CST

    The New Yorker Review

    by JeeBus

    synapsE, the New Yorker review is not so different from reviews here on AICN, it&#39;s just that it&#39;s from the opposite end of the spectrum. Anthony Lane, in his review, was very biased because he just hates Star Wars in general. His biased opinion came to light in only the first paragraph where he mentioned how Tolkien&#39;s work is more creative then SW (see his comparison to how &#39;orc&#39; sounds better than &#39;sith&#39;). From that point he continued to tear apart ROTS, mentioning his odd contempt for Yoda. He also nitpicked at small details that, you will find, most &#39;genuine&#39; reviews don&#39;t even bother to mention because such details are not very important to the purpose of fair film reviews. Therefore, I advise you to seek out a more fair review if this is what you require because despite Anthony Lane&#39;s wonderful credentials in the political landscape, he ultimately has provided a pretty shitty review of ROTS.

  • May 31, 2005, 4:30 p.m. CST

    The New Yorker Review

    by JeeBus

    synapsE, the New Yorker review is not so different from reviews here on AICN, it&#39;s just that it&#39;s from the opposite end of the spectrum. Anthony Lane, in his review, was very biased because he just hates Star Wars in general. His biased opinion came to light in only the first paragraph where he mentioned how Tolkien&#39;s work is more creative then SW (see his comparison to how &#39;orc&#39; sounds better than &#39;sith&#39;). From that point he continued to tear apart ROTS, mentioning his odd contempt for Yoda. He also nitpicked at small details that, you will find, most &#39;genuine&#39; reviews don&#39;t even bother to mention because such details are not very important to the purpose of fair film reviews. Therefore, I advise you to seek out a more fair review if this is what you require because despite Anthony Lane&#39;s wonderful credentials in the political landscape, he ultimately has provided a pretty shitty review of ROTS.

  • May 31, 2005, 4:42 p.m. CST

    New Yorker

    by JeeBus

    The New Yorker review was not so much a review as it was a shitty rip against Star Wars. Anthony Lane may have some great political credentials, but he was unable to provide some solid reasons for why he felt ROTS did not serve it&#39;s purpose as a film. Instead he ripped on Yoda and on minor details that have nothing to do with the quality of acting, dialogue and action in the movie. What&#39;s the purpose of comparing &#39;orc&#39; to &#39;sith&#39;? SynapsE, if you want a genuine review then don&#39;t look to a person who is just as biased in his hatred for SW as a fanboy is for his love of SW. The fact that Lane has numerous credentials is cool but it doesn&#39;t make him any better at writing movie reviews. All it means is that he&#39;s an accomplished writer who wrote a shitty review of Revenge of the Sith. Everyone fucks up every now and then and Lane just wasn&#39;t able to be objective enough to give the public a decent and fair review.

  • May 31, 2005, 4:44 p.m. CST

    Hmm, what just happened

    by JeeBus

    I got 3 posts here that say the same thing. Good Lord, what have I done?!!! Sorry everyone.

  • May 31, 2005, 5:22 p.m. CST

    JeeBus

    by synapsE

    First, Let me say (I guess again) that I liked this movie. And like many people here I have been waiting a long time to see it (I saw Ep IV in Madras India when I was 5 yrs old. It was the first movie I ever saw and I have loved it ever since...) Second, I like this discussion JeeBus and I think you make a good point. There probably are no objective reviews since this is not in a general sense a medium that can be judged objectively (and particularly in the case of this franchise where blinding loyalty or hatred seem to be the only currency of description...). Maybe Lane is a hater. Certainly he has a high threshold for movie enjoyment in general (I often wonder why a guy who seems to dislike EVERY movie he sees goes to the movies so often...) BUt when I read the review, I was hurt a litle myself about how he could attack my favorite movies of all time. But then I started to think about it...what is so special about these film? Do they push our moral sensibilitites? No Do they reveal something about ourselves? No Do they even have the kind of dialogue that makes us appreciate the language of Shakespeare? No. I think they are what they are: pop culture, pocorn entertainment wrapped in the nostalgia of my youth (or in the case of fanboy I guess wrapped in the bitter disappointment of impending(current?) failure. I guess maybe that&#39;s why it bothers me so much when people like Lane pop this balloon of childhood fantasy (fine I will never use the Force and will instaed have to rely on my MD and PhD degrees to make it in this real world...). It is easy I think to call someone who shits on our private fantasy worlds haters and biased but maybe that should make us evaluate why we cling to this world so tightly. Let me ask you this question: do you think this movie will ever pass the ultimate test: the test of time? I await your response

  • May 31, 2005, 5:29 p.m. CST

    New Yorker review is the SW equivalent to Spinal Tap&#39;s Shark

    by Colonel_Blimp

    The New Yorker review is completely meaningless. It&#39;s basically just a person who states that he hates SW, and then continues to make half assed jokes on the series&#39; expense. If he wants to waste collumn-space on that, that&#39;s his prerogative, but he can&#39;t expect to be taken seriously. Most of his points are completely irrelevant, as they concern the logic of the film&#39;s universe. If he doesn&#39;t buy the fact that yoda talks backwards, or that padme was unaware she had twins (was she BTW? I can&#39;t really remember), that&#39;s his promblem, not the movie&#39;s. If he, in his elitist arrogance, has a problem with suspension of disbelief, then of course he will hate these movies. What kind of points is he trying to make anyway? That SW would be better if you saw the characters take a dump? Why doesn&#39;t he write something proper, something analyzing the movie&#39;s dramaturgy, or plot or whathaveyou. His task as a reviewer is to give us his subjective reflections on the movie, while still enabling us to make up our own mind if this is something we want to see or not. Instead he seemingly goes on a Michael Moore-ish crusade, devoid of nuance, against Lucas, just to flex his rethorical muscles - ending up with a lot of funny remarks and no substance. How hard is it to write a "review" like that? You could butcher Citizen Kane in the same way if you wanted to. There really is no point. Why is he so incredibly bitter towards SW and GL? Was he bitten by a jawa as a kid or something? I think it&#39;s a really unprofessional review. Not that he&#39;s not entitled to hate the movie, of course he is. But if he expects to be taken seriously as a critic, he needs to play by the rules. If he wanted to pan it, it would be extremely easy to do it properly (The SWs are probably the easiest movies in the world to pan), without reverting to childish "My orc is better than your sith" bullshit. This review comes out just as a rambling ego trip. And so what if he has won a pulitzer? Even a broken clock shows the correct time twice a day.

  • May 31, 2005, 5:55 p.m. CST

    Colonel_Blimp

    by synapsE

    I am not trying to become the most hated "talkbacker" here but can we at least try this intellectual exercies... Okay...deep breath...count to 10...and lets try to find the magical (and here the seemingly completely obscured) land of Perspective! "Why doesn&#39;t he write something proper, something analyzing the movie&#39;s dramaturgy, or plot or whathaveyou" What?....Are you talking about a Star Wars movie...really...this bothers you that he does not engage the plot of this movie? Which plot..cloning stormtroopers or the end of the Jedi council? "You could butcher Citizen Kane in the same way if you wanted to. " Could you really? Does it bother you that in your rush to defend this movie you equate (and not a little equivocate) these two pieces? "The SWs are probably the easiest movies in the world to pan" I agree because they are fluff. And I still dont see why someone attacking fluff bothers you so much... "basically just a person who states that he hates SW, and then continues to make half assed jokes on the series&#39; expense. " Bully you for defending this poor mutli million dollar merchandinsing scheme to increase the size of LUcas&#39; already large turkey gullet. I grant that is entertaining but it is merchandising nonetheless. "And so what if he has won a pulitzer? Even a broken clock shows the correct time twice a day." I am not sure what to say to this. The analogy is imprecise at best. I agree that there are gerat movies out there (and before anyone starts another argument I think is pointless...I don&#39;t think LOTR is one of them) and these films deserve serious evaluation and help us "make up our own mind if this is something we want to see or not" but do you expect everyone here to believe that a bad New Yorker review would have influenced you NOT to see this film? This is a fantasy world that has no meaning and the message is trite at best. So I dont find writing a flippant review insulting to what ultimately (I think) will be a flippant movie. Best

  • May 31, 2005, 6:52 p.m. CST

    synapsE

    by JeeBus

    I&#39;m glad you are enjoying the discussion. Sorry for the late reply. You have a good point about "clinging to this world so tightly," however, I must say that I wasn&#39;t at all insulted by Lane&#39;s review for this reasons you stated. I was insulted because it just wasn&#39;t a good review. It&#39;s the same feeling I get when I read a "good" review from Roger Ebert only to find out that the reason he liked it was because there some chick with big titties in the movie. Film reviews, in order to be useful to the general public, ought to be as objective as possible, free from bias. AICN reviews aren&#39;t useful to the general public because the reviews are coming from admitted fanboys who have admitted biases. Perhaps Lane&#39;s review is really just helpful to people who read the New Yorker. That&#39;s fine by me, but in general it&#39;s just not a good review. Let me know if I should explain more about what I just said. In terms of Star Wars: PT, standing the test of time, well, if you separate it from the OT then they won&#39;t. The OT actually made sure of this because it IS the original SW. First time anyone saw anything of that kind. By the time the PT rolled around, we were used to so many huge summer blockbusters that the PT provided nothing new to audiences. I love LOTR, but for all the love that Lord of the Rings gets, it won&#39;t stand the test of time either because it didn&#39;t offer anything that we hadn&#39;t seen before in some form or another in other movies. (Here comes the wrath of the LOTR fans) I loved ROTS, and everyone else can think it&#39;s a piece of shit. It really doesn&#39;t matter to me. I loved Phantom Menace and I don&#39;t care when people say it&#39;s a piece of shit (which most people say). Also, it is easy to call someone a hater because they&#39;re just so easy to spot, but I only called Lane that because his haterish ways prevented him from writing a useful review. I don&#39;t mind if he shits on Star Wars, but lets not call it a good review. Let&#39;s call it what it is... one man&#39;s opinion and nothing more.

  • May 31, 2005, 11:47 p.m. CST

    As long as we&#39;re all agreed that Phantom Menace is a piece o

    by chickychow

    uh, we are all agreed on that, right guys...?

  • June 1, 2005, 3:26 a.m. CST

    SynapsE,

    by Colonel_Blimp

    Sorry for not answering earlier, I think we live in different time zones. And you don&#39;t have to patronize me with breathing exercises. I&#39;m not a mad apologist, and I don&#39;t think you a rambling hater. I&#39;m just sick and tired of reviews like that getting accepted as proper journalism. I don&#39;t think it&#39;s necessary to comment all your points, as JeeBus covers a lot of them. Let me just say that my point was that Lane&#39;s review has no journalistic value whatsoever. An average person, not knowing a lot about SW (those exist you know), but interested to find out more about this film there&#39;s been so much talk about, would be absolutely none the wiser after reading Lane. Thus it has failed as a review. The essence of Lane&#39;s opinion is that these movies suck, and have sucked for 28 years, because they are fantasy films. His hostility doesn&#39;t match up with his arguments. If this movie is so bad, why doesn&#39;t he address something more essential than the triviality of a broken syntax in one of the aliens? And his arguments doesn&#39;t even add up. Is he saying that just because an immigrant doesn&#39;t speak with a proper english syntax, he can&#39;t be intelligent, have an education and say wise things? How&#39;s that for cultural imperialism? And the reason it would be so easy to slag off SW is not because it is fluff, it is because they wear their heart on their sleeve (something practically no other movies do these days). They don&#39;t hide behind irony, postmodernism or anything like that. Instead, what you see is what you get, and of course an elitist, snobbish reviewer from The New Yorker (probably no less snobbish after his pulitzer) will have to find that banal and not worth his valuable, pulitzer winning time. What I don&#39;t understand is why he bothered to review this movie in the first place. He&#39;s obviously way above such mundane, tiresome attempts at "art". And I&#39;m not so much defending SW and GL as I am attacking lazy, arrogant journalists who put themself and their opinions above everybody else. Oh, and finally, while I&#39;m in no way equating, (nor consciously equivocating, (it was late, I was tired)) SW and Citizen Kane as movies, I&#39;m still convinced you could write a similar review on Citizen Kane. That&#39;s sort of the premise of the rethoric of Cicero and his likes, that you could use it to defend ANY point of view. That&#39;s why it was considered so dangerous. And that&#39;s why Lane should know better and just leave it alone, because all he comes out as is a spoiled little kid with a "smarter than thou" attitude...

  • June 1, 2005, 6:01 a.m. CST

    Chickychow...

    by fanb0y

    *force choke* The ability to hate TPM is insignifigant next to the power of the 6 film SAGA...I find your lack of fandom disturbing. TPM was hated in its day because it wasn&#39;t what we expected, and JarJar was annoying. When seen in the context of the 6 film saga, the lightness of TPM is needed to counterpoint ROTS&#39;s overload of tragedy. TPM has some strong points such as QuiGonJinn, whose strong prescence almost saves the film. Whenever I watch TPM I still cringe at alot of it, but I find the bite lessens with time and its still a good story, and certain scenes such as Anakin leaving his Mother still tug the heartstrings. I remember seeing TPM at the theatre still 6 years ago...it was a moment that will live in eternity. TPM is underrated and overhated. Disapointing yes, cringeworthy in parts yes, annoying, yes....good movie still...yes, suceeds in introducing an epic saga...YES!

  • June 1, 2005, 6:05 a.m. CST

    oh and I almost forgot

    by fanb0y

    the guy yelling "son of suns" at the ending celebration in TPM that counterpoints the guy yelling "son of suns" at the coruscant celebration in ROTJ:SE... "In the time of greatest despair, a savior will rise and he will be known as the son of suns" Anakin Skywalker...is...The Son of Suns. And that TPM easter egg is an integral part of Anakin&#39;s prophesized rise.

  • June 1, 2005, 11:52 a.m. CST

    TPM hated?

    by Right Bastard

    Disapointing: yes. Cringeworthy, yes. Annoying: yes. Good movie still: yes? Denial: yes. Tastes are tastes, but ROTS made me hate TPM even MORE than I previously did. There was so much story in ROTS that could have been explored in two movies, that it pointed out to me just how pointless TPM was. It is a totally unnecessary film, and causes great feelings of anger and frustration...for me, at least.

  • June 1, 2005, 2:56 p.m. CST

    FORGET THE HYPE

    by DD

    I have just seen the ROTS, and reading the review on this forum it is clear to me that 99% of the people are emotionally attached to Star Wars in some way or another. I think that these emotions are clouding the judgment of many reviewers. (It

  • June 2, 2005, 2:24 a.m. CST

    FORGET THE HATE

    by fanb0y

    I have just seen the ROTS, and reading the hate on this forum it is clear to me that 99% of the ROTS dissers are emotionally attached to hating Star Wars in some way or another. I think that these emotions are clouding the judgment of many reviewers. (It

  • June 2, 2005, 2:28 p.m. CST

    FORGET THE HATE ???

    by DD

    This is just what I mean, criticizing ROTS is like telling a mother she has a ugly baby. It is possible not to feel the same way about this film as everyone else and still enjoy it, even if it did not meet the high expectations you had. Now Padme showed leadership in the first two films at a young age (this has also been seen in our history of this planet, in the past many kingdoms, empires have been ruled by wise young rulers, for more information please consult your local library). This leadership was not visible in ROTS, I had expected her to become a stronger leader as things got worse. I thinks this would have made her a better character. But she had become a typical chick seen in many films. Every good film sets some type of standard, it might be a sward fight, character development and so on, and it is these standards, which are the bases of comparison between films. I have yet to see a perfect, maybe this is not possible because the bar keeps on moving higher and higher, and to me ROTS is not perfect.

  • June 2, 2005, 5:05 p.m. CST

    We Were Doing So Well...

    by DeeJay

    fanb0y... do you not share the desire to have a debate without flaming? People who disagree with you or I don&#39;t need to be called "idiot" or labelled as "emotionally attached". It conjures up images of Napolean Dynamite, which is the *last* thing we need on a Star Wars discussion board (that was sarcasm). SynapsE... just so you know, you aren&#39;t hated. I would disagree with your characterization that the film is trite, though. Even if most of the new trilogy&#39;s innovations are coming from behind the camera, a project that demands this level of interest will ultimately have *some* larger cultural effect (for better or worse). Such is inevitable. On a different note, with the issue of Padme&#39;s age having been raised, a couple of you brought a question to my mind. We know that throughout history, there have been numerous "kids" who ruled empires (Nero being an example). Would a futuristic society, however, work for or against younger people having vast political power? In most futuristic multi-world scenarios, age becomes a more abstract concept than what most of us currently experience, so I&#39;m quite sure what&#39;s likely to happen. What do others think?

  • June 3, 2005, 4:17 a.m. CST

    We ARE doing so well :)

    by fanb0y

    It WAS a deliberate Napoleon Dynamite reference, I&#39;m glad you picked up on that DeeJay. Anyway, if the haters want flame thats what they&#39;ll get. But apparently this new bunch of flame troopers has been programmed to be docile. DD can&#39;t grasp the concept that Padme is married to Anakin, he seems to think that she should be running th e galaxy alone and that pregnancy and marriage take no toll on a person, espically when that person turns to the dark side and destroys the whole galaxy. Anyway, as I was saying, the concept of electing a 13yr old girl to be the ruler of a planet...is...interesting...but thats fantasy for you. I certainly woudln&#39;t wish that in our future, if anyone has talked to the average 13yr old girl in america you&#39;ll understand what I mean. I think, in the films, the idea of having the teen girl ruler is setup to be a figurehead to be easily manipulated by the wise old political men such as Palpatine, as she played right into his hands in EP1 having him elected Chancellor. Just dangle some gap clothes, paris hilton, orlando bloom and american idol and you can control any 13yr old girl.

  • June 3, 2005, 8:47 a.m. CST

    Saw RotS again yesterday

    by Colonel_Blimp

    It still rocks! Obi-Wan&#39;s final words to Anakin...heart wrenching. And I saw the millenium falcon! And the clone troopers in green camouflage are so cool! And you know what, I don&#39;t even have a problem with the Noooo! It works absolutely swell mesa thinks. Only thing I wish they had added was dropping yoda off at dagobah, so there was a reason for luke having his deja vu. Anyone now if that was filmed and edited out or something?

  • June 3, 2005, 10:22 a.m. CST

    luke&#39;s deja vu

    by Right Bastard

    was from his prescience, and from being in touch with the force (back when the force was a mystical presence based on buddhism, rather than that mitochondria b.s.). Anyway, I&#39;d rather imagine Yoda traveling as a jaded "ronin", like Toshiro Mifune in Yojimbo and Sanjiro, from planet to planet until he ended up in Dagobah (without anyone knowing where he was).

  • June 3, 2005, 10:54 a.m. CST

    This whole midichlorian thing...

    by Right Bastard

    As you know, Mitochondria are the energy producing organelles in our Eukaryotic cells. (not the only one, but the primary one.) Since these organelles have certain characteristics, like DNA and producing their own energy, many think that these are actually separate "creatures" that exist in all of our cells in a symbiotic relationship. Some think that there is a power that can be "tapped in to" with these cells, so we get science fiction like "Parasite Eve" (Japanese video game years ago) and "Midichlorians"..............Generally, in Buddhism (there are more versions of Buddhism than there are versions of Christianity) and Hinduism, there is a general "force" that hold together the whole universe. Ugh, it&#39;s hard to explain. (One of the many buddhist paradoxes, "If you can explain it, then you don&#39;t understand it.") Basically, their "god" isn&#39;t a god. It is existence. Everything is god. Every individual, tree, dog, plant, person, what have you; it&#39;s all the same. It&#39;s all connected by a...well, a "(life) force". When you realize that you are "God" and that you are connected to everything, then you achieve enlightenment, and are a Buddha (Joseph Campbell said, "In the East each person is God. In the west, when one person realized this, it was regarded as a &#39;miracle&#39; and he got crucified." Heh, Jesus was a Buddha.). Obviously, with everything that went on in the 70&#39;s, with people becoming interesting in things like Eastern mysticism, religion, and philosophy, George Lucas was highly influenced by it. In The Empire Strikes Back, Yoda is basically reading from a Buddhist&#39;s text book. So, does explaining away mystical philosophy with half-assed pseudo-science (midichlorians?) bother anyone else, or is it just me? Why did Lucas feel the need to introduce the whole Midichlorian aspect into the PT? It was "the force flows in everything, the rocks, the trees, the land, the ship". It wasn&#39;t "Luke, if you get your Midichlorians pumping enough, you will be able to move that ship." It was "the force is strong with this one". Not "Wow, I bet this pilot has a huge Midichlorian count!". See what I mean? It takes away from the cool message that "there is potential in everyone if you believe" and changes it to "if you&#39;re born with certain advantages, you can tap into them". End Rant....

  • June 4, 2005, 7:26 a.m. CST

    Last

    by moviemaniac-7

    Now go on with your lives, dammit!

  • June 4, 2005, 11:17 a.m. CST

    What lives?

    by Colonel_Blimp

  • June 4, 2005, 12:50 p.m. CST

    Almost at the end of the rainbow

    by rockket

    I am a London based Brit who in half an hours time will sit down in his comfy chair to watch Dr Who on BBC1 at 7.00pm. Oh, this is a Star Wars III talkback situation. Oh, terribly sorry, I thought I was in the Dr Who talkback section. I made an absolute blithering mistake earlier and put a Blake 7 posting in a comedy section about Americas version of Chubby Brown. Oh, alright then, SW3 had some fairly useless parts. I have to let out of the bag that as Andy Sirkis did such a superb job of Gollom, so, the Killer Rabbit from M Python & the Holy Grail did justice to the Yoda part. Nobody could recognise that lethal Killer Bunny under its glowing, slighlty darker green, radiant cloak of CGI magicianship. Even Sirkis must have admired our own home grown talent there with the Killer Bunny, even though he treads the boards in Broadways "Spamalot" currently I think.

  • June 4, 2005, 3:19 p.m. CST

    Wow! That episode of Dr Who ROCKS!!!

    by rockket

    Just recovering from my live screening of Dr Who. Oh WOW!!! The trailer for next weeks episode has LOADS OF DALEKS!!!! Oh this is all too much!!!!!!!!!!

  • June 5, 2005, 11:33 p.m. CST

    Thank you once again, George Lucas...

    by WillowFan2001

    For taking a big smelly dump on my childhood. At least this one wasn&#39;t as big and smelly as the first two, but a turd is still a turd. You don&#39;t know how to write emotional dialogue anymore, especially romance scenes, so why you even tried baffles me. And although you proved you can direct, that wasn&#39;t nearly enough. I should cruise over to Skywalker Ranch, Stan-and-Kenny style, to get my 6 bucks back from you. Your biggest trilogy of mistakes, other than the new movies themselves, were: 3) Turning Yoda into a badass fighter. He&#39;s small. He&#39;s green. He comically mangles phrases, and he&#39;s smarter than he looks. So why have him flip around and slash things, just because digitech says you can? Also, have you completely lost your ear for how YOUR OWN CHARACTER talks? Help him you did not. 2) Hayden Christensen. He glowers effectively, and he moves like a Jedi, but he sounds like a redwood delivering his lines. Was that his fault, or yours? Either way, I never believed him. Or Natalie Portman, for that matter, but since she&#39;s an Oscar-caliber actress, this one must be your fault. 1) Jar-Jar. Why couldn&#39;t you have at least killed him? And then there&#39;s the whole "Greedo fired first" thing, and the Special Edition re-releases to begin with, and well, honestly, Mr. Lucas, I think you&#39;re a pretty crappy filmmaker. You should never be allowed to handle your own past material again. Who wants to be the NEW writer/director for Indy IV?

  • June 5, 2005, 11:40 p.m. CST

    Oh, and I almost forgot...

    by WillowFan2001

    "NOOOOOOOOOO!" What a horrible moment, and yet, it make me laugh in disbelief. Vader was expressing exactly how I felt about what I was watching. Thank you for providing me with one moment of pure Gouda cheese. I couldn&#39;t believe the cliches you managed to put into your own movie, like the "rustic family standing proudly against a sunset," but then again, I guess when you&#39;re the writer and director and have everyone kissing your ass like you&#39;re God, you can do whatever you want. One more thing: I&#39;m so glad Leia didn&#39;t grow up with her real mother...else she might have turned into the whiny "I don&#39;t know you anymore" style of woman. Nice job with Padme, but the way--what a great role model for girls. Leia kicked butt. Leia was headstrong. Headstrong like Han Solo, whose character you managed to ruin in an editing room twenty years after a scene was shot. God, I&#39;m never letting my kids watch these last three movies. I want them to grow up with "Star Wars" the way I knew it, so they don&#39;t have to put up with this inferior trilogy.

  • June 7, 2005, 12:03 p.m. CST

    Nope, just didn&#39;t work ...

    by M-T-M

    Just saw ROTS and I walked away from the cinema with a squirrelly, dissatisfied feeling in my stomach. Soooo much potential, so much great technology at his disposal and, for me, Lucas just blew it. Sucky direction, dialogue that defies description, kerrr-ap action sequences (he couldn&#39;t even make Ray Park - or &#39;Jock&#39; to his friends - look good in Part 1 and that young man can do truly scary things with his body), and, most of all, bullshit bullshit bullshit character development. I accept all of Harry&#39;s remarks about the stoopid Jedi and their &#39;no attachments&#39; philosophy. But come on! I have trained thousands of young people in martial arts and if I saw 5% of the dark, brooding, self-centred shit that Annie was displaying in one of my students, I wouldn&#39;t teach him squat, much less hand him a light sabre. Bottom line, Lucas is just a splendidly creative guy who doesn&#39;t have the storytelling or directorial talent to put this across well. Give Joss Whedon, Quentin Tarantino and Kevin Smith the reins for the final 3 episodes and wait for some rocking characters, credible motivation, crackling dialogue (remember Han Solo&#39;s wonderful "I don&#39;t know - I can imagine quite a bit" in Ep IV? Nary a wry line that can come close to that little throwaway remark in ROTS) and action sequences that don&#39;t give you a headache. If only! Good moments for me - the opening sequence to rescue Palpatine. Just wonderful flying and follow-up. Seeing the corridoor where it all started in Senator Organa&#39;s ship (boy, they built those things to last!). The Michael Corleone Order 66 sequence - tightly done and it dodn&#39;t wander into schmalz too much. Other than that, bleah! One of my favourite Bloom County cartoons has Opus as the hate-everything movie reviewer. His opening salvo: "(this new film) has brought the word &#39;BAD&#39; to new levels of badness. Bad acting. Bad effects. Bad everything. This film just oozed rottenness from every bad scene ... Simply bad beyond all infinite dimensions of possible badness." And then, after a moment&#39;s consideration, he fininshes with: "Well, maybe not that bad. But Lord, it wasn&#39;t good." You said it Opus. Lord, it wasn&#39;t good.

  • June 7, 2005, 1:36 p.m. CST

    Star Wars ROTS: SUCKED

    by NOT FAT

    There aren&#39;t a lot of things to say. Harry is pathetic and this moveie - like the first and second just plain sucked. They lacked imagination and the dialog was at a 1st grade level. THIS MOVIE SUCKED. 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  • June 7, 2005, 5:21 p.m. CST

    Sucked, the Motion Picture.

    by rockket

    But, Star Wars is a childrens movie for the under 10s. Its just a playful whimsical odessey with the idea that after your 5 year old has watched he will charge to his toy box and pull out is favourite model airplane and go charging around the room making zinging noises. Wagner wrote the final part of the ring cycle FIRST and the Prologue and First two Parts over the next 25 years, just like Lucas, but, his playful odessey is black, serious stuff which fundamentally challenges what we believe to be good and evil. Lucas never meant to attempt such an epic, he just wanted to rake in Disney style cash, Disney style, but, where Disney had imagination, Lucas has none. This is why SW3 sucks a void as big as the Black part of Ol George&#39;s bank account. Yes, this movie SUCKS.

  • June 8, 2005, 2:05 a.m. CST

    my first post!-about the jedi

    by rabban

    ever since i was a kid i believed that luke was not about bringing back the old jedi order back but to bring balance to the force...look at his hands...one is dark, cold and mechanical the other is natural, warm, and human. luke disobeys the elder jedi on more then one occasion. he tries to save his friends in empire and he does not "bury his feelings deep down" and when vader threatens to turn leia to the darkside luke attacks out of love as much as anger and fear. even as a 12 year old anakin was less innocent and protected in comparison to luke. in rots you see the failings of the jedi in mace windu&#39;s inability to kill the sith lord. because mace understands the tangled web palpatine has created all over the galaxy that threatens to destroy the entire democracy. it would be like assassinating george bush once you found out the insidious motives of the skulls or some simular decadent group a leader of the people should not be a part of. but because the old jedi lacked the nature to allow temporary chaos to spread across the galaxy mace was unable to do the right thing. at the same time the jedi are a lot like catholic priests. their decadence got the best of them too...with all the child molestation and such and the "burying of emotions deep down."

  • June 8, 2005, 3:59 a.m. CST

    Something Funny..

    by Pure.Wasted

    I found it funny that while talking about Count Dooku (played by Christopher Lee), splatpnk said the following: "The Sith are backstabbers. All of them. Sith do not like to "share" power." Note that in LOTR: Fellowship of the Ring, when Gandalf is talking to Saruman (also played by Christopher Lee), he says the line, "There is only one Lord of the Rings and he does not share power." This is especially comical because of all the LOTR vs. SW arguments. Sorry for the O-T comment, had to say it. ;)

  • June 8, 2005, 7:54 p.m. CST

    rabban...

    by WillowFan2001

    So, if Mace Windu lacked the ability to kill Palpatine, why was he about to do it when Anakin stopped him and allowed the empror to gain the upper hand? Even Windu recognized the need to kill Palpatine. If you&#39;ll notice, Anakin was the one insisting that he should be brought to face justice before the Senate--Windu nixed that because the Senate loved him.

  • June 8, 2005, 7:57 p.m. CST

    rabban 2...

    by WillowFan2001

    And speaking as someone who knows a lot of Boston-area Catholic priests that did NOT molest children, your comment was way out of line. That was the failing of a few priests and Cardinal Law, not the entire hierarchy. (One could argue that Pope John Paul II was culpable for not punishing Law on learning of his coverup, but still, every priest should not have to suffer innuendo for the tremendous failings of a few.)

  • June 8, 2005, 8:59 p.m. CST

    don&#39;t take it personal willowfan

    by rabban

    as far as mace windu&#39;s actions just look how quickly he killed jango fett. once mace had sideous he should have killed him right then and there not bring him into custody even after killing 3 other jedi he still insists he must be brought into custody. it&#39;s not untill anakin shows up that mace understands that sideous must die right then and there. willowfan, i am sorry you feel like i am bashing your religion but i am not stating that all catholic priests are child molesters i am saying that the reaction to the various child molestations is slow and inefficient as was the reaction of the jedi to the strange goings on in the republic.

  • June 8, 2005, 10:54 p.m. CST

    Dude, I&#39;m not Catholic...

    by WillowFan2001

    So you&#39;re not bashing my religion. All I said was that I knew a lot of Catholic priests. And more on subject, I do once again refer you to the fact that Windu was about to kill Palpatine, although it took him a while to come to the conclusion that it needed doing. Frankly, though, I don&#39;t even though why I&#39;m bothering to discuss this. And please don&#39;t take that personally--I&#39;m not talking about discussing it with you in particular, but with anyone. This movie, after all, was just plain bad. Why would I spend so much of my life on that? Unusual my actions are, as Yoda might say.

  • June 9, 2005, 11:55 a.m. CST

    why disscuss starwars?

    by rabban

    that&#39;s easy willowfan you and (hmph) i mean all of us have been indoctrinated to accept starwars. one of the tools lucas used to tell starwars is based on the patterns of religions and folktales...starwars has been a lot of peoples sunday service. and as far as the catholic priests thing is concerned...i&#39;m sorry i assumed you were a religious man trying to defend his belief structure. i don&#39;t know you willowfan i could easily assume your phishing for a argument. btw my comparison of catholic prists is not out of line because it was obviously lucas&#39; intent to compare the two.

  • June 9, 2005, 1:33 p.m. CST

    It&#39;s all down to the parents...

    by Deadly Ernest

    It&#39;s all about good parenting skills. Anakins Mum Shmi was getting by until the Jedi council took him away with their bad parenting skills. Luke had Uncle Owen and Aunt Beru to bring him up with good values at heart, and it showed. And by the time Obi-Wan got to him he was more of a grandfather figure. Wasn&#39;t there a social services division in a galaxy far far away? If there had been, perhaps none of this would have happened. Younglings indeed. More like cheap child labour!

  • June 9, 2005, 6:04 p.m. CST

    Sadly, rabban, you&#39;re all too right

    by WillowFan2001

    We are indoctrinated. I&#39;m so glad these aren&#39;t the first three Star Wars movies, because I never would have gone to see #3 or any thereafter. I am not sure that Lucas intended to compare the Jedi with Catholic priests, but it&#39;s a possibility...I know he intended to compare Palpatine with Bush. Just one more reason for me to want my money back -- I&#39;m getting sick of political allusions in movies these days, no matter which side of the fence they&#39;re aimed at. (I take that back. I loved Team America, because at least it aimed at both sides.)

  • June 10, 2005, 3:14 a.m. CST

    eh?

    by rabban

    well...im not too sure but catholism used to allow people to become monks at very early ages? most were from all walks of life right? catholism is strict on sex and so is the jedi counsel. they both wear robes. don&#39;t they both have ties with former civilizations? again i&#39;m not sure here. and don&#39;t they both attempt to help others from all kinds of places?

  • June 10, 2005, 4:42 a.m. CST

    oh yeah i forgot to mention this

    by rabban

    episode 3 was the best star wars movie...ever.i mean if lucas would have skipt huge chunks of 1 & 2 i would have been happy. but episode 3 has all the fixings of a good star wars movie....yes there are goofy parts in it but you know what c-3po is in everone of the movies and none of you said crap about him when you were kids so just accept that you out grew the series yet lucas still got your butts into the movie seats.

  • June 10, 2005, 1:50 p.m. CST

    And you lost me again.

    by WillowFan2001

    All three original movies were far, far better than this. Just because this was marketed better, and just because it was the only one of the three prequels that almost felt like Star Wars, doesn&#39;t mean it was good. Lucas&#39;s real genius is in advertising, not in filmmaking and certainly NOT in scriptwriting.

  • June 10, 2005, 2:09 p.m. CST

    More of the Same.

    by ghkilgore

    I saw the Sith movie a couple of weeks ago and have been reflecting on what I think about it. It is more of the same as One and Two. I liked one the best. LOTR is 10 times better. I can watch LOTR over and over. This 3rd star wars movie is underwhelming. I hope some good movies come out this summer. I don&#39;t want to waist my money on movies like revenge of the sith.

  • June 10, 2005, 3:29 p.m. CST

    yep

    by rabban

    all true but none of us are the real target audience for these prequels. you should have noticed this with the pg rating,the fact that episode 1 starts with anakin as a child. the most powerful jedi is approx 3 feet tall. and the fact that the movies attempt to be simplistic. and your letting your nostalgia of the other movies blind your judgement because you were children at the time.

  • June 11, 2005, 12:59 a.m. CST

    And the final verdict on the prequel trilogy is!

    by Thayden Ozma

    That it&#39;s by far more entertaining, intelligent and watchable than anything that&#39;s ever come from you fuckfaces! See ya&#39; in hell! *big fat Bugs Bunny kisses on the lips* -Az

  • June 11, 2005, 11:03 a.m. CST

    Jedi as Priests & Rabban&#39;s Last Point

    by DeeJay

    At this point

  • June 11, 2005, 6:09 p.m. CST

    BAD WOLF 1 - WOW!! cant wait for BW II

    by rockket

    Who&#39;s ultimate adversary is back, and the storyline is only half way there!!! This is TV Sci-Fi at its FINEST!

  • June 11, 2005, 10:23 p.m. CST

    Thayden, I&#39;m going to prove you wrong

    by WillowFan2001

    Not that it should be hard. All I need to do to make a movie more intelligent, entertaining, and watchable than these past three SW installments...though probably a good deal less profitable...is to film a compilation movie of dogs taking dumps all over public parks. That&#39;ll be Episode I. Episode II will be linoleum peeling for two hours, and Episode III will be a feature-length treatment of prostitutes selling themselves. You can see it as analogous to what Star Wars has become: shitty, boring, and whoring itself out to anyone in hopes of making a buck.

  • June 12, 2005, 12:32 a.m. CST

    WillowFan2001

    by Thayden Ozma

    Your banter is as derivative as your name. You&#39;re crossing a road most traveled and safely I might add. Make a great trilogy, I&#39;d be happy to see it no matter what the box office revenue take may be. Where anyone got the notion that I back up Star Wars being great by it&#39;s box office take I&#39;ll never know, I wouldn&#39;t care if I was the only person in the theater in line, in fact I&#39;d be happier not to share the film experience with a bunch of ingrates who are unlikely to understand the film and appreciate it the way I do. But pardon me if I feel comfortably sound that you&#39;ll never pull it off based only on the level of originality yarned in your posts and the arsenal in your vocabulary is anything but fierce. Do yourself a favor and prove me wrong, but in the meantime do yourself a favor and don&#39;t be your own worst enemy and load your post with fodder for me to crush, it&#39;s not doing you any favors. I&#39;m only telling you this because it for your own good. -Az

  • June 12, 2005, 10:55 a.m. CST

    Willow & Clutch

    by DeeJay

    Clutch Monkey

  • June 12, 2005, 2:44 p.m. CST

    finally saw it

    by rivercb

    I can&#39;t believe its getting such great reviews! It&#39;s darker but that doesn&#39;t make up for the bad writing and poor execution. He left all of the answers for this film and just sped through them a check-list of shit he had to do. The last 20 minutes reminded me of watching my mom clean up the toys on my floor as a kid. The main point of this film was to show how Anakin finally turns and it COMPLETELY fails to be convincing. Instead of pride, ego, anger, ambition, we get some awkward twist of love and fear. Why base it on the weakest aspect of the trilogy! Didn&#39;t he actually sit and watch Attack of the Clones? You want me to believe a guy is going to sell his soul within 5 mins to save the woman he loves, then give me a fucking hint that they actually love each other. not "i love, you" "i, luv u more!"

  • June 12, 2005, 4:34 p.m. CST

    Thayden

    by WillowFan2001

    When one talks about the arsenal of someone else&#39;s vocabulary, one should make sure that one does not place such a comment in the middle of a run-on sentence. It tends to diminish one&#39;s credibility in matters of language. I never said that you based the "greatness" (sarcastic quote marks) of Episode III on its take at the box office...I was only making the observation that moviegoers are far more likely to accept shit when it&#39;s packaged as coming from a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away. When I, a lifetime sci-fi/fantasy/horror geek who passionately loves even such retarded-but-they-tried movies as "Final Destination" and its sequel, walk out of the theater shaking my head in stunned sadness...well, that should be enough to tell anyone that something is rotten at Skywalker Ranch. Oh, and one more thing: I never said I was going to make a GREAT trilogy. Oh, no. All I said was that I would make a trilogy of films that were more intelligent, watchable, and entertaining than these past three SW movies. As far as I&#39;m concerned, even a POOR trilogy should be able to meet Lucas&#39;s latest benchmark. I&#39;ve already started writing the script for Episode I--you remember, the one where dogs shit in the park--but unfortunately, I&#39;m having some problems. I&#39;ve written in a Palpatine character, but he&#39;s going to be impossible to cast, as George Lucas won&#39;t even return my calls. Say...you wouldn&#39;t be interested, would you?

  • June 12, 2005, 4:57 p.m. CST

    DeeJay and rivercb

    by WillowFan2001

    DeeJay...I do see your point. The problem is that as far as I&#39;m concerned, it doesn&#39;t hold. Sure, the special effects in the first three movies have been awesome, cool piled on top of cool. However, that does nothing to mitigate my complaint about all three, namely: they are BAD FILMS. I don&#39;t just go to sci-fi movies for the neat eye candy. (Though, to be fair, that is part of it.) I go because I want to spend a couple hours in a different universe with interesting people. Think about the first three films...you had a princess who was capable of kicking some ass, an old man who was incredibly powerful but who lived in hiding on an out-of-the-way planet, a mercenary with a soft heart, and a farmboy whose destiny was to save the galaxy from an evil empire. Oh, and of course, Darth Vader. INTERESTING CHARACTERS. COMPELLING ACTION. In this new trilogy, the only actors who lived up to the legacy of the originals were Ewan McGregor and Ian McDiarmid. Christensen played Anakin as a big glowering brat, Portman couldn&#39;t stop Padme from beocming ever more the wilting lady, and let&#39;s face it--their romance was just awful. Playing off rivercb&#39;s point, this is what I&#39;m supposed to believe turned Anakin to the Dark Side? I never believed them together on-screen for a minute! (Really, really excellent post, rivercb.) So Lucas made his movies pretty. So what? Wash garbage if you want, but it&#39;s still garbage. The techniques used in the new trilogy have already been used to turn out some wonderful cinema, so I suppose I&#39;ll endure the existence of the first three episodes. But I don&#39;t have to like them, and I&#39;m still quite free to wish they didn&#39;t exist. I&#39;m hopeful that YOU see the point behind my response.

  • June 12, 2005, 5:33 p.m. CST

    hey Deejay!

    by rabban

    sorry for the late response i had some malware on my computer that needed attention. i think movies that are rated for a younger audience are sadly,totally geared towards children only these days. the parent or guardian is forced to watch this movie with nothing truely appealing about it for them. i wonder if old yeller or the yearling would get a harsh rating if it was originally made now? your probably right about the shao lin inspiration, their fall was also out of a slow response time too wasn&#39;t it? i still say episode 3 was a good movie. it was better then the other 2 movies and i liked it more then empire and jedi. i never cared for the duel climax style of starwars films. the lightsaber fight, the dogfight and the land skermish...i always enjoyed the lightsaber stuff so thats one of the reasons i liked episode 3. i liked how things got tied together and how much episode 3 felt like a space opera, it was nice and tragic. when the original starwars was being made even the film crew thought it was lame too but it was a surprise victory for lucas and it&#39;s sad that you all can&#39;t remember the spirit behind the series.

  • June 12, 2005, 10:12 p.m. CST

    WillowFan2001

    by Azlam Orlandu

    burn...ohhh...that cut like a knife. Get back to the table, the DM is getting irritated that you keep getting out of character to post on this site. Go along, shoo. -Az

  • June 12, 2005, 10:54 p.m. CST

    by WillowFan2001

    Yeah, I&#39;m out of character--when you&#39;re the one posting under two different names. Take your amusingly ridiculous role-playing allusions and shove &#39;em up your Episode III. In the meantime, I guess I&#39;ll have to cross your name (both of them) off the short list for the Palpatine character. No matter. Dick Cheney and Al Franken both have the script, and I hear they&#39;re very interested.

  • June 13, 2005, 6:34 p.m. CST

    Execute Order 66

    by la_sith

    The Phantom Menace rules!

  • June 14, 2005, 1:46 p.m. CST

    nice review Harry

    by RJ MacReady

    Maybe when Yoda was talking about " to exile I go" he ment TV?

  • June 14, 2005, 1:50 p.m. CST

    Manchester United

    by rockket

    US sports tycoon Malcolm Glazer has taken over our Brit soccer team Man U. Any NFL fans who have comments on this guy. A million Manx fans over here are terrified that he will concrete over the pitch, demolish the stadium and build a few hundred Condos. Oh, I am far too interested in Dr Who - Bad Wolf II - episode 2 - to bother with any more SW3 comments. Serious soccer commentry like anything on Arsenal FC will be welcome.

  • June 14, 2005, 4:47 p.m. CST

    Nope, sorry but this film sucked

    by curiousjosh

    Not that there weren&#39;t a couple good moments, not the the actors weren&#39;t pretty good - but the story is nowhere near Empire and it&#39;s just not a good story, it&#39;s still a video game - sorry Harry, you were blinded by the dark side -

  • June 15, 2005, 1:23 a.m. CST

    soccer is boring anymore

    by white owl

    i played my last game of soccer when i was three.

  • June 15, 2005, 2:24 a.m. CST

    Poop!

    by Azlam Orlandu

    Poop =< The Phantom Menace Just goes to show you that Batman Begins is cool. Argue that logic bitches!!! Um...what did I...? What? Blargh! -Az

  • June 15, 2005, 3:22 a.m. CST

    star wars redemption

    by patsy

    real review???it was, darlings, at least for us.... after being gutted with disappointment by ep I, lukewarm to ep II, everything assaults you here, chokes ya...I saw soccer hooligans wipe their eyes in the movie theater Harry&#39;s right, this one rocks!

  • June 15, 2005, 7:30 a.m. CST

    Can anyone explain to me, once and for all

    by Colonel_Blimp

    Why people who HATE the PT spend so much time on these TBs and elsewhere trying to convince us fanboys that we are deluded? I know this question has been posted ad nauseam, but I&#39;m really curious. Anyone with a degree in psychology or something around here who can explain? It just seems kinda...pathological... You didn&#39;t see me spending time on the troy TBs, or better comparison, the matrix TBs. They where crappy movies, but you know what? I got over it, and let the fanboys enjoy them, not feeling the divine call to guide them onto the right path.

  • June 15, 2005, 1:20 p.m. CST

    Fuck the haters

    by la_sith

    I just got off the phone with my brother, who HATED ep. I and II so much, he deems them "the worst movies evah" (he&#39;s from Boston). He saw RotS last night, said it was fantastic and yes, even used Harry&#39;s words and called it "a masterpiece." I asked him if he thought hell had frozen over. "I think it has. That movie was absolutely awesome." The circle is now complete.

  • June 15, 2005, 5:37 p.m. CST

    Did we watch the same movie, Harry?

    by mrmgp

    I must have watched a different ROTS than you did, because the one I saw was a major letdown.

  • June 16, 2005, 5:03 a.m. CST

    Episode IV- 1977 version

    by Black Satin 2

    I was in school when one of the students brought in a vhs copy of the 1977 version of that movie. Now, it hasn&#39;t anything to do with Revenge, but it made me think of my DVDs of SW, Empire and Jedi. In that version, Greedo has Han pinned down and it is Solo who fires first! The angle is on Solo, there is an explosion under the table and all you see is Greedo hitting the table dead. It looks just like a scene from the Marvel comic I bought in 1978. In the new version, Lucas definitely did some foolish tampering because in that movie, the pace picks up because Han wants to get off Tatoonie immediately and didn&#39;t need that silly scene with Jabba the Hut.

  • June 16, 2005, 8:54 a.m. CST

    I agree about the last half hour.

    by Malx

    ROTS had a few coherent moments, but the wheels come off it in the last 30 minutes faster than any other movie I&#39;ve ever seen. Suddenly it&#39;s all CGI mayhem (like the intro, but even less logical), and Lucas is clearly plowing through a checklist of all the crap he was too lazy and sloppy to get two in the previous 2.5 films. It&#39;s unbelievable. "Luke!" "Leia!" "Oh, by the way Qui-Gon taught me how to turn immortal somehow, study this." "I lost, now I&#39;m off to exile." Blah blah blah. I can&#39;t believe how much time and effort was wasted on the utter meaninglessness of the first two films, and then everything of actual interest and import was turned into a list of bullet points at the end of the last one. There&#39;s more humor and narrative flow to the Burger King commercials than there is to ROTS. And newsflash: Any time you have to watch a bunch of cartoons (Clone Wars) and play a video game to enjoy a movie, the movie blows. End of line.

  • June 16, 2005, 7:45 p.m. CST

    To Willow...

    by DeeJay

    Willow... I appreciate your response (which was a much fairer than your previous tongue-in-cheek posting). Still, I wouldn&#39;t minimize the technical achievements of this film (or the new trilogy, for that matter) as being "eye candy" just as I wouldn&#39;t imply that "The Jazz Singer" was a gimmick film. There is a reason why that&#39;s one of the select few 1927 films widely remembered.

  • June 17, 2005, 3:18 a.m. CST

    episode 3 talkback

    by byog

    In my opinion all disatisfied Star Wars fans are getting what they really need. Here&#39;s why I think this. 1. The stories are not as good as they think. 2. The stories by necessity needed flaws to invalidate them. 3. It&#39;s necessary to see that in the physical universe Entropy cannot be denied even if other aspects of physics are ignored or bent. I appologize for not completing the list. These three occupy a lot of my mental bandwidth at this time. I wish now to expand on these three to unload and explain if they need explaination for the reader. Number one; Even in the 20th century the ideas presented in the "Star Wars" series have been told better. Even in the science fiction type story. The best written example of critique is a book titled "Microworlds" by Stanislaw Lem. I decide to take this avenue of explaination because the other avenues have been treaded upon all over the net. A lot of people writing to point ones&#39; apology will quote Cambells&#39; books or rattle off a series of plays or movies to further their arguement. I&#39;ve even read people say that Lucas isn&#39;t as good a storyteller and that he should have only produced. My favorite personal arguement of this vain is to say, Frank Herbert did it all a decade earlier and I believe better. It&#39;s just the movie industry couldn&#39;t get it on screen better and faster than Lucas did. No, Lems is better. It treats the subject of story directly, critically and from someone who has written science fiction successfully and I might add has had close exposure to non- democratic governments. Besides this, he has a strong scientific background! While watching episode three it seemed logical to me given the story that Anakin should have sat back and let Windu and Sidious duke it out and then destroy the survivor. Why? Because both sides of the equation of the "force" betrayed their coda. If he was the true balancer of the force every fan viewer of the show can&#39;t believe it takes him a generation to see this as evidenced in episode six. The story doesn&#39;t balance. That seques to number two. Why would the "Star Wars" stories need invalidation? Simply put, it keeps the hearer/viewer/audence grounded. It unburdens the story of holding more than it can. The truth within the story can be systematized. Finally Number three, energy moves from a more useful state to a less useful one. I have observed everyone instinctually knows this but don&#39;t always reconize it, conciously. People at this point often resort to the arguement of order created or generatated out of chaos. They fail to see the energy injected into the process. Either by themselves or others to get the order. It becomes an attempt to break into a closed loop system. Of course the more energy pumped into the system the more chaos you get. The speed which it occurs, which you can have the most effect on, rarely is reconized as in need of a slow down. Our own society faces this very problem not just our myths. None of these are original ideas of mine. They have all been written before, as my favorite author once said though " the challenge is to make them new." byog

  • June 17, 2005, 5:38 a.m. CST

    WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT, BYOG?

    by Colonel_Blimp

    That post is completely incoherent.

  • June 17, 2005, 10:26 p.m. CST

    episode 3 talkback

    by byog

    The genres disscussed here in general and episode 3 of "Star Wars" as it relates to them. Colonel_Blimp ask yourself this question. What&#39;s the difference in these three genres. 1.science fiction 2.science fantasy 3.fantasy I&#39;m very eager to hear what you think. Do you believe in such a thing as upper and lower realms of literature?

  • June 17, 2005, 11:59 p.m. CST

    In REEsponse to your Post Colonel Blimp.....Regading your Ad Nau

    by Xeno Skywalker

    The answer to your question is DENIAL!................or.......Everyone is a sheep that wants to be "Cool" and diss what other&#39;s love. I dunno. Im with you. If I dont like a movie, I have NEVER gone to a forum for that movie to talk about what I do not like. EVER. And I will NEVER do that. I have NO REASON to. It makes NO Sense to me. That is all. Move along. Be Happy. Buy more merchandise. "It&#39;s a stand-off. Let&#39;s go!" *BihZHOOM!*

  • June 18, 2005, 2:14 p.m. CST

    Byog... huh? Xeno... very good point

    by DeeJay

    Byog... you *are* trying to be humorous with your superfluous use of verbiage, aren&#39;t you? I mean, asking about the differences between 3 separate film genres is like asking the about the differences between the colors red, blue and green. Technical answers exist for both questions, but neither has been a key component of our discussion up to this point. Furthermore, how one determines what they perceive to be the "upper and lower realms of literature" is completely unrelated to how one recognizes different film genres. In statistical terms, the first subject is an example of an ordinal scale, with the other being a nominal scale. Translation: your last question makes virtually no sense in the context of this discussion. On a different note... would you at least acknowledge that your last 2 posts are (intentional?) assaults on the English language? Xeno... you actually bring up a good point, and one which relates to film-viewing in general. There is at least one psychological study that claimed people who are critical of a particular movie tend to be "perceived" as smarter than those who are complementary of the same work. If true, then this particular phenomenon may actually reinforce the behavior you referenced

  • June 18, 2005, 10:38 p.m. CST

    episode 3 talkback

    by byog

    Wow where do little ol me start?? Deejay; difference between color... wavelength??? I get your point though, technical difference. I don&#39;t know if I agree. It has been written that in the beginning of the development of literary types the geneology is distinguished clearly and unmistakably. Only in the most advanced stages do we find hybridization. Do you think that a law of literature exists that makes it taboo to produce a work of literary genealogical incest? By the way this has nothing to do with biology. I&#39;m talking about literature, for those who would bend my question into anything I don&#39;t intend. I talk about literature because it&#39;s being mined for film. Everyone wants great movies right?? My only point for criticism. Would you believe there was a time when there was no clear cut border between upper and lower realms of literature. Assaults on the english language !!! Yeah.. why not... thieving language (-: Funny at that hour how can I help not being slap happy...or at least truncated. truncated english... acronyms... Specialized languages possible use create power base. Does created power base attract the corruptable or corrupt the attractable? Both, neither; Answer unnecessary nor desired. Makes lots of money at the box office. Remember Joseph Cambells&#39; retelling of the story which includes, "as soon as you think everything is just so... bang you have the "becoming thing again."" I wish physics was paid more attention to in movies. "An object in motion has a tendency to stay in motion." That includes all internal organs, by the way. That&#39;s how a knockout is achieved in boxing. The brain keeps moving even after the skull stops. By the way... quit trying to trick me into doing all the work!!!! Dutchmonkey, is the new Doctor Who any good? Are the production values as good as casting seems to be? I think I saw a picture of the actor who plays the DR. and he has the right look.

  • June 19, 2005, 7:52 a.m. CST

    byog, you crack me up.

    by Colonel_Blimp

    Your posts are hilarious man.

  • June 19, 2005, 3:45 p.m. CST

    byog, you crack me up

    by byog

    Your welcome....I think.

  • June 20, 2005, 11:42 a.m. CST

    Clutch... don&#39;t get me wrong Byog... hmmmm

    by DeeJay

    Clutch... just for the record, I wasn&#39;t referring to you (or the entirety of film criticism, for that matter) when I referenced that particular psychological study. I was just referencing a general phenomenon that had been mentioned. I&#39;m usually not the type that talks about people as if they aren&#39;t there. Regarding Dr. Who... it&#39;s not me you need to convince, but the anti-Dr. Who posters in the "Dr. Who Finale" discussion talkback. Byog... after reading your last post, I&#39;m going to take it that you&#39;re simply messing with us, and leave it be. :-)

  • June 21, 2005, 10:03 p.m. CST

    Forget this forgetful film and see not only a great Batman film,

    by AntoniusBloc

    Batman Begins puts Sith to shame, and will probably do the same to the money oriented War of the Worlds. The most important difference is that Batman Begins is great storytelling that start with the writing, and then is well executed by the director and the cast, both doing great in the first real Batman film. This could be the first Oscar worthy superhero film, if being Oscar worthy means anything after the last fiasco (Million Dollar Baby?! What a joke)

  • June 25, 2005, 12:52 p.m. CST

    by Azlam Orlandu

  • June 27, 2005, 1:59 p.m. CST

    Excellent film...

    by Aston Lad

    ...the duel at the end was perfect. I&#39;ve always seen Vader as an anti-hero rather than a true villain...but this film proves he really is a complete and utter bastard by the time he puts on the mask. I felt no pity when Obi Wan left him to burn.

  • June 28, 2005, 6:57 p.m. CST

    Haa haa!

    by Azlam Orlandu

    Forgotten? The films been out for over a month and it&#39;s still on the top ten. You&#39;re scraping the barrel for ammo. Success is already with the film. It&#39;s over, as is this party. -Az

  • June 30, 2005, 11:43 p.m. CST

    LAST

    by 4836

    Now it&#39;s time to take one last look a this movie go one day set in really watch it it&#39;s a dam good movie some going to hat it no matter what not the best but good own it&#39;s own stop trying to turn sw into lotr it&#39;s not the ot was also silly fun

  • July 11, 2005, 5:32 p.m. CST

    You said it.

    by TanSei

    Thank you for your review. That&#39;s exactly what I felt, you just put it in black and white. I am sick of trying to justify my feelings compared to critics. If you don&#39;t get, then you don&#39;t get it. I don&#39;t think there was nothing wrong with ROTS, far from it. You just have to stop being so critical about everything. It&#39;s the easiest thing in the world, being critical.

  • July 15, 2005, 9:23 a.m. CST

    Fanboyism

    by Yotaruvegeta

    I have to stand between the people who hated this new trilogy and the blind fanboys who lie to themselves and say "no, that&#39;s my honest review" <br> <br> This movie was "aiight." there were problems with it- "Hey, let me slap this darth vader outfit I have lying around on Anakin" "hey, let&#39;s have anakin become darth vader immediately so it&#39;s a whole birth/death comparison with Amidala" "hey, let&#39;s rush the end of the move- the coolest part- and not show any badass darth vader evil stuff" <br> <br> Fanboys, George Lucas has changed. You may say "no he&#39;s exactly the same" but he&#39;s fallen into this lackluster hollywood trap that makes filmmakers rely on special effects beauty and spectacle more than actual, um storytelling. But this movie&#39;s good outweighs the bad. So it doesn&#39;t suck, but don&#39;t get carried away with praise of it.

  • July 15, 2005, 12:51 p.m. CST

    something that must be seen by AICN talkbackers:

    by Forestal

    http://www.radosh.net/images/hillary_and_natalie.jpg

  • July 16, 2005, 11:35 a.m. CST

    Fanboyism, YOU ARE CORRECT SIR!

    by Azlam Orlandu

    This movie was fucking smokin&#39;. And after the ashes have settled it&#39;s at the top of my all-time list with a bullet. Served it&#39;s purpose one might say. And with that I resign my commission here at Aint it Cool. "Job well done Az." Why thank you. -Az

  • July 16, 2005, 10 p.m. CST

    Order 66 is the saddest moment in all of SW

    by Orionsangels

    When that montage begins it&#39;s sad, but it really gets me when they show the battle raging on Kashyyyk, for certain reasons. Well for one it&#39;s the last hooray for ILM in a SW movie. That&#39;s the last battle special effects battle sequence ever done by ILM. When you hear the music with that scene, gets me everytime. Next is one Chewbacca picks up Yoda and puts him on his shoulders. It&#39;s one of the most iconic SW moments in history and Yes I do believe Chewbacca was in on it all the while to help the Jedi. The moment where Obi-Wan meets up with Chewbacca at the cantina, is no accident. I also get sad when Yoda says goodbye to Chewbacca. It&#39;s the last time he&#39;ll ever see Chewbacca, but it&#39;s also heartbreaking, because you know what Yoda&#39;s returning to, his religion, his students, his family, everything he worked for, for nearly 900 years, is basically gone and the look on his face, "goodbye...chewbacca" :(

  • July 18, 2005, 7:45 a.m. CST

    black satin 2: hey, you&#39;re right! Han did shoot first in the

    by BarrelRider

    Dude, you are pretty observant! I&#39;ve never heard anybody mention that in 7 years of coming to AICN - but I just checked my old VHS and new DVD copies of Star Wars and I was shocked, shocked to discover that you are absolutely 100% correct. Well done.

  • Oct. 10, 2005, 12:53 p.m. CST

    ... and repeat ad infinitum!

    by Rendell

    Hell I still love it! That is all.

  • Aug. 30, 2006, 5:36 a.m. CST

    Another dire film

    by Glyn

    This is a film almost as bad as Ep2. Along the same lines too. Why do the mass produced robots exhibit fear? surely there was a quality controller working at the factory. And why do they sound like Vietnam vets. Padme is supposed to be some great politician and caring thinker, if this is true why does she have only one none simpering line in the film.

  • May 21, 2008, 9:25 a.m. CST

    3 years later

    by romanocc

    I thought I would go back and post on the 3 PT films after we all had time to digest the film and give it proper context. I have to say ROTS has gotten worse over the 3 years, and really hasn't aged well. I am suprised to say this cause I really liked it opening night, but the flaws just stick out to me each and everytime I watch it, and because of this, the whole PT has fallen apart for me, as I went from a Saga fan, back to an OT fan. It is a shame but ROTS was really a key to bridging the gap from PT to OT, and sadly Lucas couldn't do it.

  • July 6, 2008, 10:52 a.m. CST

    my order

    by erikzod

    Empire Hope Sith Jedi Clones Menace

  • Oct. 6, 2008, 9:47 a.m. CST

    erikzod

    by Mr Gorilla

    i agree - although I have to switch Home and Empire, because Hope was the first after all...

  • Oct. 12, 2008, 9:55 p.m. CST

    It is a masterpiece...

    by hypnotron

    A work of genius.

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 11:48 p.m. CST

    NO

    by Bishop6

    its fucking shit. Even on DVD. First for 2009 biatchs

  • May 23, 2009, 2:06 a.m. CST

    i own this thread now.

    by maitlanr

    byog is the winner. the mind degrades. rotted up.

  • May 25, 2009, 1:08 a.m. CST

    No, I own this thread

    by Chuck_Chuckwalla

    Sorry babe.

  • Dec. 9, 2009, 7:59 a.m. CST

    THIS WAS THE GREATEST OF ALL STAR WARS FILMS -

    by SeXX ED

    - .

  • May 3, 2010, 12:04 a.m. CST

    FIRST!!!

    by TheBoManKicksAssAndTakesBlame

    Wow, Harry is still in denial. Defending the script by trying to make sense of why Anakin went with Palpatine. Lame writing, that's why. Sure SITH was the best of the new three but still nowhere near as good as Harry's review suggests. Is he really a Lucas stoolie or what?

  • May 5, 2010, 10:25 a.m. CST

    Alot of latecomers here

    by orcus

  • May 18, 2010, 5:16 a.m. CST

    What a Pile of Shit...

    by Pawprint

    One final turd on the coffin of Star Wars...<p> I didn't see EpIII in the cinema, so I bought the DVD. I haven't watched it since 2005 or very early 2006 I think.<p> Yes, it is the best film of the PT, but saying that is essentially like saying "That last kick in the bollocks you gave me was my favourite".

  • June 17, 2010, 12:29 p.m. CST

    Ian McDermit (sp?) was the only one who could act

    by orcus

    Loved the scenes with him. Sam was just too restrained, it would have been fun to watch him cut loose

  • July 26, 2010, 2:15 p.m. CST

    Watched it again last night

    by bendenramoth

    I haven't watched this movie for a few years, but decided to watch it again last night. Just the same as in 2005, I want to rip my heart out. It still hurts after all these years how if one person had taken the time to address Anakin's fears or not treated him as a leper from a child on up because they were afraid of how strong with the force he was. I even read the book and in there, I really blame Mace Windu. Mace was one of the "elders" of the council and the last person Anakin cried out to for help, even though he was in so much soul-pain knowing Mace didn't want him to be a Jedi in the first place. Mace saw where the fear was and all he could think was of himself. I know out there, there is a faction that says that Anakin had many chances to make the decision not to turn to the dark side. Didn't Thomas Moore say in Utopia that first you create a thief then punish him for being that which you created (very bad paraphrase)? Why is Anakin expected to be so morally upstanding when no one else is in the movie? Isn't that alot to ask? It took about a year to get this movie out of my system when it first came out. Here we go again...

  • Nov. 8, 2010, 10:47 a.m. CST

    That's actually a good point

    by orcus

    Orcus will contemplate this on the tree of woe

  • Dec. 8, 2010, 2:16 p.m. CST

    GONE!

    by orcus

  • July 21, 2011, 5:47 p.m. CST

    YODA VS SIDIOUS

    by robert nuckels

    i've seen this film maybe 27 times. I'll probably watch it another 127. Each time, the scene where Yoda finally confronts Sidious is the part i REALLY wait for. It always seems a tad different. Mc dermid's lisping voice, & exuberant Malign seem organic in there intent to dismantle everything habitual in Yoda & his antiquated concept of Ethics. The sheer scope of Palpatine's demonic contempt for the Old World Order, & Yoda's own arid make on the 'Great Mystery' is TOWERING. It calls to mind the Ahrimanic detachment Karl rove would employ in briskly creating a quaint little spreadsheet that would exile a billion or so unsuspecting souls into some glacial Prison colony somewhere on the Hoth system.

  • June 4, 2012, 3:59 p.m. CST

    Cake anyone? Anybody?

    by Tom-Paul Smith

    Wow this is the quietest out of all the Star Wars Prequel Parties. It's completely dead. I'm biking back over to TPM, least thats still dying. I'll leave the cake.

  • Dec. 14, 2012, 2:25 p.m. CST

    I have watched my last new STAR WARS film.

    by nemov

    Either Harry is wrong or he is going to die before episode 7.

  • Dec. 25, 2012, 12:15 p.m. CST

    So wai, no cake?

    by orcus

  • Dec. 25, 2012, 12:15 p.m. CST

    wait. Damn typing with claws

    by orcus