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Bud Rose challenges Hallenbeck to a Batting Duel over SOLDIER and Joe swings back. NOTE: STRONG TALK

Published at:  Aug 28, 1998 1:41:37 AM CDT

"Opinions are like ass-holes everybody has one", and Bud here thinks Hallenbeck's smells pretty ripe, at least in regards to Joe's review of
Kurt Russell's SOLDIER. I personally hope Bud's right. Father Geek would like nothing better than for ol' Snake's latest to kick royal ass.




SOLDIER IS A GREAT MOVIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!



Joe Hallenbeck were you born with your head up your ass or did you put it
there? Soldier is a great movie or so i and the other couple hundred
people who saw it in Pasadena tonight thought. when I read what you had
to say about it thought way cool man this dude is right on and Soldier must
be one huge piece of shit so when they asked me if I wanted to see Soldier
tonight I said yeah i MUST SEE how BAD this flick must be. Uh uh wrong
wrong wrong the Kurt man does it again this movie is the best movie I have
seen this year or at least the best movie since the last one you didn't
like and sorry Joe we are getting tired of your sorryassed opinions please
look at Private Ryan and Armagedon again and go back to UCS film school and
ask for a refund. Yes some of the fx were cheesy but so probably are your
underpants and like the man said ITS NOT DONE YET! so wait until there
done and maybe your balls will drop by then.

And while were giving notes to producers what does it mean when everyone
claps at the end? That they think you are a dickhead? No Joe they are
not thinking about you at all it means they liked the movie.

Bud Rose

The Mighty Joe may be a little battered, but he's not broken, here he is coming right back at Bud.




Okay, you lil' bitch. You wanna call out the Big, Bad Mighty Joe and try
to take him down with them fancy words of praise about a film that can
be best described as barely watchable? Fine. Let's
step outside the saloon so I can teach you lesson.

1. Soldier sucked shit...NOT because of the cheesey f/x(some of which
were still rough as mentioned in MY review), but because the script,
directing, and acting sucked dead donkey balls. It's an absolutely
wretched, cliched shit story that a fuckin Mongoloid child must have
written. It's Shane set on Garbage World. The trailer is even laughably
bad.

2. The test screening results for this movie are very bad. WB is worried
that yet again they have spent a shit load of mula on yet another
crapola bomb. Trust me on this, kiddo...the audience(a large majority)
hated this flick. I overheard at least 3 dozen people say how pissed off
they were that they wasted their time watching such a
"FUCKIN' PIECE OF SHIT!" And these quotes came from the main
DEMOGRAPHIC...I know that's a big word for ya, but hopefully you'll be
able to find out what it means in that large book full of words and
definitions.

BTW, when I say "TRUST ME ON THIS"...I mean it. I know what I'm talking
about.

Bang! I clipped ya. I don't feel like taking the soul of yet another
pre-pubesant little shitbird like yourself. Hopefully you learned a
valuable lesson. I know you were trying to be the bad ass in front of
all your friends. I know you think it's cool to try and dis' Joe, but
keep this in mind, "Many have gone up against me. Their tombstones only
read this: F.W.J. -- Translation: Fucked With Joe. I'm letting you off
easy, Kid. Don't try to beat the old gun slinger. Next time you open
that lil' bitch mouth of yours I may have to close it for good.

Class dismissed.

Joe Hallenbeck

Oh, by the way, Rose Bud -- It's natural for hair to grow down there.



    + Expand All

    Readers Talkback

  • Aug 28, 1998 2:36:36 AM CDT

    Joe might be an ass, but give the guy some props

    by ranma

    Ok, so we all hate Joe, sure, he cuss's, he puts down everything we love and like about kick ass movies, but still, c'mon. He has his own opinion, and he's not out to take down every movie goer. As Harry himself quoted, everyone has a right to their own opinion, and even though I personally think all Joe really needs is to get laid at least once in his life, he's still got some balls to speak his mind and not care about anyone else. He prolly gets more shit then anyone else, but at least he's honest.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Aug 28, 1998 4:42:23 AM CDT

    Joe H

    by matski

    I'm new to the AICN family, so just getting to grips with the "personalities".

    Unfortunately it seems I should use the wrod under advisement when it comes to Joe Hallenback.

    Who is this fella?

    Listen Joe, slagging every movie you see does not make you a Tough Guy. It makes you a sad wanker.

    You are not a scaret person, but obviously just a sad strange little man.

    As the fella said, everybody has an opinion man.

    And as to your reference about "Mongoloid" children, man I'm glad you find disabilites so amusing, you sad fuck.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Aug 28, 1998 5:10:30 AM CDT

    Joe vs Rose

    by mr dylan

    Why can't both Rose and Joe express an opinion without is getting personal ?

    I thought this was a site dedicated to film, TV etc and to the army of fans which follow thie industries every move with keen interest [such as myself]. Not to allow people such as Joe and Rose to bitch off at each other over one stupid bloody movie.

    Each of us, in this world has the right to express our opinion on a subject, in such a way that does not require the human mind to degenerate into futile name calling, insults and childish behavior. This observation is aimed at no-one imparticular, but is my opinion on what I have just read.

    Come on, Father Geek. Lets keep a little focus on things. Keep the venom for the reviews and opinions on the media - not each other.

    How about a discussion on Batman and Robin to vent everyones anger !!

    Reply to Talkback

  • Aug 28, 1998 6:05:33 AM CDT

    Shut the fxxx up Joe!

    by sk

    Okay, Joe, you have to realize that you just suck big time. That meaningless rant there uncovered a complete egomaniac, an asshole. First of all, you are indeed entitled to your meanings, but so are other people! And second, you're not king of this fucking web page - Harry is. You sit by your computer and think you're Bruce Willis in The Last Boy Scout, but everybody knows you're a socially dysfuctional prick with no friends who's trying to play Big Man on the net. Fucked with Joe? Fuck you.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Aug 28, 1998 6:15:41 AM CDT

    Yeah BUD!

    by patrick

    Yeah man, i've heard a lot of stuff about this movie and it looks freakin' awesome. And Joe has made mistakes before in his reviews, I never go by what he says

    Reply to Talkback

  • Aug 28, 1998 6:20:24 AM CDT

    Joe

    by 433

    Sure, Hallenbeck's opinions may not always be spot on, but you have to admit that the vast majority of movies produced these days are festering pooplogs. And SOLDIER is one of them. Awful.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Aug 28, 1998 6:22:01 AM CDT

    Oh!

    by kurt russell

    Please don't hurt me. They told me if I didn't make this movie they would kill Goldie Hawn.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Aug 28, 1998 6:54:21 AM CDT

    Yes, let's kicks Joe's butt

    by pacman

    Bud is right. Joe has been sitting on that theater chair for to long that he cannot anymore figure out whats good out there.

    Count me in, SOLDIER WILL BE A HIT!!!

    Reply to Talkback

  • Aug 28, 1998 7:45:11 AM CDT

    opine

    by dwdunphy

    In the end, a critic's opinions are solely his own and it is up to the viewer to make up his or her own mind.

    So, if everyone in the world said "Batman & Robin is a hunk of bile", but you, the viewer enjoyed it, then who cares what anyone says?

    Mr. Hallenbeck has found a groove in which he writes his reviews. Love it or hate it, that's how it is. If you have a different opinion, then don't pick up the gauntlet just to slap the man in the face. Put your money where the glove is (and smell it) and write a review of your own. Why come after someone else with all the makings of a pajama-party catfight? Defend the movie if you so choose, but put it in writing and state the facts, not just vagaries like "Well, it just kicked ass is all..." Give whys and wherefores and all the important details. If you want to beat him, don't just talk tough. Play his game. Write a more persuasive review.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Aug 28, 1998 7:50:47 AM CDT

    Hallenbeck doesn't know shit

    by vogue

    Once again Hallenbeck proves that he is really the asshole many of us suspected he always was. He doesn't know jack-shit!! Just because he gets his name and a quote featured in a movie ad (i.e. Baseketball) he thinks that what he says is gospel. While he can have his name above that stinking piece-of-shit Baseketball !! Joe claims to know so much about movies, yet apparently he couldn't see that the movie would fail miserably. I'll reserve judgment until I see SOLDIER in October, but I have to agree with some of the others when I say, and, I should add TRUST ME ON THIS...JOE DOSEN'T KNOW SHIT ABOUT MOVIES!!!

    Reply to Talkback

  • Aug 28, 1998 7:51:13 AM CDT

    AICN

    by dead donkey balls

    This site is beginning to have stupid news rather than cool news. There are a lotta flicks being made out there that should have plenty of info leaking out, but instead we have Bud vs. Joe and some other weak headlines. By the way, Bud kicked Joe's ass even though I have a special place in my dead nutsack for Joe.

    POINT: Give me prequel news, ST: Insurrection, and more news about cool movies like Soldier. Oh, and I want pretty pictures. I've had to resort to *gulp* other sites for cool news.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Aug 28, 1998 8:06:22 AM CDT

    Joe mama

    by nefarious

    Joe represents one of the major
    problems with the internet. He
    spouts his pretentious bullshit
    without any accountablilty. That
    doesn't get me too pissed until
    he starts talking like he wants
    to take out Rose in a physical
    confrontation. Quit the macho
    bullshit, Joe. In all likeleyhood
    my dead grandmother could apply
    a generous beat-down upon your
    not-so-mighty ass, biotch!

    Reply to Talkback

  • Aug 28, 1998 8:23:42 AM CDT

    MJH

    by mr fubar

    I thought it was great Joe called Bud "pre-pubesant"...the irony. All I've come to expect from the Mighty are rants that sound like they are coming from a geeky 14 year old who is still afraid to talk to GIRLS. Jesus, look at his list of favorite movies!!! Vroom! Vroom!

    Reply to Talkback

  • Aug 28, 1998 8:30:18 AM CDT

    Who gives?

    by harlequin

    Why don't you all give it a rest? So Joe swears a lot...well who gives a fuck? So you dont all agree with what he says...so what?

    The whole point of this site is everyone is entitled to their opinion and each reviewer can write whatever they want. If you want some piece of shit review that tells you nothing about the film then read a newspaper. If you want to know a bit more about the film you come to this site. I like all the reviews for the reason that it is a personal opinion. Okay maybe we dont all agree with everyones review of every total film but why shit on Hallenbeck?

    If it bothers you that much just dont read it. You are all grown up enough to make your own decisions.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Aug 28, 1998 8:38:37 AM CDT

    ?

    by joe

    Harlequin writes "Okay maybe we dont all agree with everyones review of every total film but why shit on Hallenbeck? If it bothers you that much just dont read it. You are all grown up enough to make your own decisions."

    Sorry Mrs. Hallenback, we didn't mean to hurt you or your son's feelings.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Aug 28, 1998 8:48:07 AM CDT

    Ripping Hallenback a New Asshole!!!!!!

    by crash davis

    Hallenback really has nothing better to do than gripe, so let's just let him do it peacefully. The Internet is his only source of venting...at least the only one where he can talk to people. Others on the outside would just throw him to the ground and kick sand in his face. Hallenback, you ever kissed a girl? This guy goes to USC?????????? UH, YAH! RIGHT!! I've been coming to this site for a long while now and NOT ONCE has Hallenback had a positive review. I'd love to see this guy get a legitimate job as a film critic. I'd love to see this guy get a job as a filmmaker. With his attitude, no crew or financial backer will endure his sorry ass and poor attitude on the product he makes. Nothing makes the guy happy. OK, but do we have to endure the same shit day-in and day-out? I've given up on his reviews because they're all the same. I'm just responding now because of the public backlash on the, uh, um "Mighty Joe" and just couldn't pass up the opportunity. JOE: GET SOME COUNSELING AND FIND SOMETHING, ANYTHING, TO MAKE LIFE HAPPY FOR YOU. WE'RE TIRED OF HEARING YOUR RANTS! THEY'RE IRRITATING AND DOWNRIGHT BORING! THEY'RE NOT FUNNY...THEY'RE JUST A DESPERATE PLEA FROM SOMEONE WHO HAS NOTHING ELSE IN LIFE TO CHERISH...OR DO!

    Reply to Talkback

  • Aug 28, 1998 8:51:13 AM CDT

    SOLDIER

    by matt

    Hallenbeck is right. I saw the movie and thought it was pretty bad.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Aug 28, 1998 9:05:00 AM CDT

    Here..eat this you meatballs

    by shaman

    LOOK YOU SPASTIC MORONS! YOu don't like what Joe has to say, then DON'T READ IT!!! Every one of harry's titles about Hallenback says 'HALLENBACK!' in it! So don't click your lil mousie button on it Everyone can have their own opinion and quite frankly, Joe is a sorry piece of shit sometimes but so am I! So is Harry! So are you!! Hell man I will go see one that he proclaims 'cool as hell' and just say the exact opposite. Or him saying it sucked and me saying it rocked. You flamers saying Joe is over the top, a idiot, that he hates everything and all that BS. Piss off! Don't read it. Read your Smarmy lil Siskel and Ebert drone that basically says everything everyone else says. I will stick with Joe or whoever and do something that obviously everyone who bagged on this cannot do...DECIDE FOR MYSELF!

    Reply to Talkback

  • Aug 28, 1998 9:28:05 AM CDT

    The Elevated Tone Today

    by kagemusha

    I would ask politely that all of you (including Hallenbeck and his detractors as well) remember that this site is not screened to keep out minors. Yes, even small children are reading your scatological, gay-bashing rants. Oh, sure, I say the naughty words around consenting adults, too, but I WILL NOT swear around children. There was once a time, far back in the mists of ancient history, when the great Harry Knowles would not print a four-letter word on this site. Then came Hallenbeck, and, well, the damn was broken. (Sorry.) We know nothing about "Joe Hallenbeck" in his personal life. We don't know his sexual orientation or proclivities, ethnicity, career choices, social interaction skills, or even age or gender. All we know is that he likes to express his generally negative feelings using words that are not appropriate on an open web site. And by now WE ALL KNOW THAT, so there is absolutely no point in flaming him about that anymore. But Joe, please try not to get drawn into juvenile hair-pulling contests like this one in the future...please? (P.S.: The best-written "character" on this site (other than Harry himself) is "Moriarty." He always has been, and probably always will be. Kudos, my friend.)

    Reply to Talkback

  • Aug 28, 1998 10:14:11 AM CDT

    random stuff about the posts

    by cracker

    OK, first off, let me say that I had a great letter written but it got sent before I thought it had... so I am mnot sure if the better version of this is already out there...

    anyways...

    FOr those that dont like Joe hallenback (not sure of spelling and dont care enough to check), then you are now warned taht his reviews will always be this way. he is crude, opinionalted, and pretty damn boring to be honest... but anyone who gets upset by him and asks him to stop needs to find a new pursuit.. I hear the cigarette vendors are looking for a new person to lobby for them....

    My point being, if you see Joe's name in a review, and Harry is pretty good at saying who is reviewing or not, so you will be warned, then dont read it... you just have to choose.... bu quit complaining...

    now onto movie stuff... I have re-read his movie review again on Soldier, and while I havent seen it (or care to), all i can see that Joe is saying is nothing mroe then "oh yeah?!"... he uses that as a blankest excuse... he is that way now and will be that way in the future... I woudl think anyone who knows him by now knows he is nothing more then an entertainig read (and has no merit whatsoever about film reviews)....

    my point being that dont let Joe get to you or offend you. If he does, ignroe him and dont read him (because he sure never breaks news on anything)... and quit complaining... he wont change. And if you are to doubt him, have proof, because he never has any...

    oh well I am done... and bored... sorry this letter sucks. my last one was much btter

    Cracker

    Reply to Talkback

  • Aug 28, 1998 10:21:51 AM CDT

    C'mon People

    by alicia

    Just in case you guys have forgotten, We live in a great free country that we are all given the great opportunity to freely speak our minds. If we all agreed about everything, we would have a different flag hanging. Personally I take reviews on this page for what they are. No matter what anyone says about a film, if it sounds interesting go see. No one at this site is telling you to think like them. So dont. It opens your eyes to films you may not know about, and it also gives you a grasp of what to expect. So everybody chill out pull your skirts down. I think the bottom line for everybody to get so hyped up over this is that we all love film. And lets enjoy our common ground, rather than tear each to shreds.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Aug 28, 1998 11:01:09 AM CDT

    joe vs. bud...gimme a break

    by moe

    Who the fuck really cares what these two bitch about, one liked the movie, the other didn't. If you have half a brain go see it yourself instead of listening to these whiney bitches. Sometimes Joe is right, but his point of view never dictates my life. If I listened to everything Bob Fenster has said about movies I would have killed myself long ago fearing Hollywood is fresh out of ideas. At least that was Fenster's opinion after giving Goodfellas only 3 out of 5 stars. Fucking idiot.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Aug 28, 1998 11:03:55 AM CDT

    Enough is enough

    by badashe

    Alright, Harry, can we please ring the bell on these useless "fights" and send everyone to a neutral corner? If someone wants to respond to what Hallenbeck, you, Robo or anyone else thinks about a movie, let them make their point and let's go on with our lives. Now I love movies, but they are JUST movies. Nothing more, Nothing less.
    Continue the great work!

    BTW, I am actually coming to enjoy this new site design.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Aug 28, 1998 11:13:25 AM CDT

    Hallenbeck is the man!

    by marcello

    I always enjoy Hallenbeck's reviews and think he is right on the money most of the time. OK, he was way to kind to 'Saving Private Ryan' (3.5 stars, you gotta be kidding!), but other than that, he is the (foul) voice of reason on the internet. Keep it up!

    Reply to Talkback

  • Aug 28, 1998 11:26:38 AM CDT

    Rants About Joe

    by the shadow

    The last few posts have made the point very clear: if you don't like Joe H, then DON'T READ HIS REVIEWS!!!!

    Also, what is very ironic, is that many of the folks flaming Joe for his foul language, rambling rants and attitude, are guilty of the very same in their posts.

    I don't think Joe is the greatest reviewer in moviedom, but his reviews can be entertaining at times. It's like t.v., if you don't like it, change the damn channel!!!!

    Reply to Talkback

  • Aug 28, 1998 11:30:04 AM CDT

    Joe might not be right, but --

    by heckchap

    -- He's only human!

    Okay, he'd the Greatest Private Eye-Silverback Creation in all Christendom...but what's a meaning between friends?

    I often disagree with Joe's comments. "Armageddon", I thought, was -- while not BAD -- was badly directed, and just plain dumb. And, I hate "Unforgiven".

    I read the original "Soldier" cript some years ago, and DID IT SUCK. Thankfully, the shooting draft was not by Peoples. I read it, and while I think there's still stuff that could have been bettered, it was still creditable.

    C'mon, guys! Anything less than the FINAL RELEASE CUT doesn't count. Remember the "Scrawl looked like it was shot on a garbage can" for "Star Wars"????

    I think column reviews like this are unfair for that reason.

    I personally am expecting the movie to suck. Joe had said it sucks. But until we see it...we SHOULDN'T ALREADY believe the movie will suck!

    Haven't you forgotten how movies you thought you'd suck...you really enjoyed? (I liked "Hudson HAwk", and thought about half of "Waterworld" was pretty neat. I STILL can't understand people who say they prefer "Jedi" over "Empire", though!!!)

    Let's wait. Remain calm-headed. Decide for ourselves. And respect Joes's feelings, correct/incorrect as they may stand...

    Heckchap

    Reply to Talkback

  • Aug 28, 1998 11:34:10 AM CDT

    You realize of course...

    by mc

    that Hallenbeck must be getting a kick out of reading the last 20 or so messages here. I would *love* if my writings generated that many passionate responses. I mean, "Damn." Joe Hallenbeck is my god, he's the best read on Harry's page, and his reviews are the only ones I read regularly. Go Joe...

    Reply to Talkback

  • Aug 28, 1998 11:41:34 AM CDT

    Who cares? The movies is going to suck ass anyways.

    by bitchass

    Yeah! woohoo! Another Kurt Russell as a soldier-type guy movie set in the future! Hope its as good as Escape From LA...
    Stop bashing each other and start bashing the trash that make these kind of films - AND the type that watch and enjoy them.
    The world isn't making fun of America because your president fucked some whore, it's because you make these SHIT movies.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Aug 28, 1998 11:43:48 AM CDT

    Refund my ass!

    by pips

    Joe, don't trust this dude! He doesn't know what the hell he's talking about. Saving Private Ryan, don't get your refund. Same for Armageddon. I don't know why people are making such a hate for this movie, as if they were reviewing Titanic. Armageddon was cool.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Aug 28, 1998 11:57:59 AM CDT

    no big deal

    by keke

    why is everyone taking this so seriously? I quote one of my fellow backtalkers, "If you don"t like him, don't read him."

    Reply to Talkback

  • Aug 28, 1998 12:13:23 PM CDT

    Bud Rose is a jackass!

    by pips

    Bud, you don't know what good films are or what the definition of "cool" is! Soldier is an example of how dumb-minded Hollywood is. You didn't friggin' elaborate on your review of Soldier! Cool or not, man, you got beaten by Joe Hallenbeck! I'll bet you thought Event Horizon was cool. That movie was done by Soldier director, Paul Thomas Anderson, no wait a minute, Paul Anderson! Shit, I always get mixed up with "Boogie Nights" director and "Event Horizon" director. Anyway, you really didn't focus on the movie, Rose! Like they always say, think of what you're gonna say before you say it! Oh and Saving Private Ryan is the best movie of this year and will sweep the oscars, so you "take your head out of your ass". You haven't even seen it! That's gonna be too bad for you, Rose. No one gives a shit about your weakass reviews. Your review of Soldier is as dumbass as the movie.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Aug 28, 1998 12:23:44 PM CDT

    Pupose well served

    by cosigliere

    Regardless of whether or not you like Mr Hallenbeck, judging by the amount of talk back here it is obvious that at the very least he is able to illicit a response from a great deal of the AICN public. Much like Rush limbaugh, Howard Stern, Jim Rome(to a lesser extent) - he takes a strong stand for what he believes and you either love him or hate him for it. There is a reason why Harry keeps him around

    Reply to Talkback

  • Aug 28, 1998 12:57:03 PM CDT

    joe

    by eve

    anyone who is offended by joe hallenbeck deserves to be.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Aug 28, 1998 1:05:08 PM CDT

    joe

    by eve

    anyone who is offended by joe hallenbeck deserves to be.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Aug 28, 1998 2:32:34 PM CDT

    bla

    by bla bla bla

    bla bla bla you fuckig suck bla bla bla you fucking suck bla bla bla you fucking suck
    iwannaknowmoreaboutstarwars!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Reply to Talkback

  • Aug 28, 1998 2:37:51 PM CDT

    NO DOUBT

    by yassifar

    no shit man i want to here more stuff about star wars not FAG WARS everyone in here seems to be more concerened about how guys suck dick and not to concerened with movies. Movies are cool man its like an amussmant park for your mind why not take it for what it is and try, just try to enjoy it.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Aug 28, 1998 3:17:14 PM CDT

    Hallenbeck is a God!!!!!!

    by mickey rat

    First off I'm getting real fuckin tired of hearing all you little pussy-want-to-be's giving Joe a hard time. The simple fact is that Joe loves movies, he lives for movies that's his life and he knows more about them then any of you crack whores out there. So if you disagree with Joe's views go fuck yourself. Joe is a God!!!!

    Reply to Talkback

  • Aug 28, 1998 3:25:58 PM CDT

    Joe Fucking Hallenbeck

    by big bad mutha

    What an absolute asshole this guy is. On top of that he wouldnt know a good movie if it hit him in that fat bloated head of his. He rants and raves, and no one really cares about what he has to say. Joe, there are enough assholes in this world, so shut your trap and get fucking lost. If you really want me to, I shut it for ya, prick.

    Big Bad Mutha

    Reply to Talkback

  • Aug 28, 1998 4:15:46 PM CDT

    Hallenbeck

    by dash

    Um-A big time Hollywud produc-a, Harry. It seems this Hallenbeck character of yours gets more reaction than anything else on yur site, short of Prequel news, or LOTR!!!

    Wadya say we turn his life story inta a film -- and 'av him REVIEW IT!!

    Reply to Talkback

  • Aug 28, 1998 6:34:57 PM CDT

    Joe cracks me up

    by billy bob mm-hmm

    Bottom line is just that: Joe Hallenbeck cracks me up. He has strong words and opinions, esp. given that he works in Hollywood as a writer, as I'm sure many of you have read when Harry reviews movies seen with him. Rosebud (really an original name)has his own opinions, as I'm sure everyone else does. I just hope he responds and Joe and he can go at it again.

    Guffawing at all this,

    Carl

    Reply to Talkback

  • Aug 28, 1998 11:20:02 PM CDT

    FOR JOE AND HARRY

    by dochorror

    joe you are a man huh is that why you couldnt answer back without resorting to whats his names adolescense. oh yeah very manly picking on handicaped people. i wont use fancy words just a plain and simple someone needs to put a foot up your ass. i dont know who you are but you just made an ass out of yourself. you can call me anything you like your infantile remarks wont do anything but reassure everyone what you just showed them. at least be a man and apologize or dont. im not trying to be a politically correct tree hugging hippie but that was just taking it too far. this message is just like your reviews an opinion. why is it that when you feel no one knows who you are that it always gets ugly. this isnt my site but this kind of crap really lowers the purpose of what i believe to be this sites purpose. i agree opinions are like assholes everybody has one. this whole thing is rather SPRINERESQUE!!!!!

    Reply to Talkback

  • Aug 29, 1998 3:16:48 AM CDT

    It Stinks!

    by doom

    This Rose Bud review is obviously fake. Either it's a plant by a WB employee, or this guy really is stupid. Word is out that Soldier is a stinker! Until this Bud review, I hadn't heard one good thing about it.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Aug 29, 1998 7:04:53 AM CDT

    A Spellchecker, A Brain, And A Little Proofreading...

    by ikon

    Do any of you people know how to proofread your posts before you send them? Not all, but too many of you come off as illiterate morons. If the majority of "Avid Movie Fans" that frequent this site are no better than the majority of this mob, pompously venting bile and screeching like a bunch of raped apes, no wonder Hollywood keeps pumping fecal matter all over the silver screens of America and the world.(*whew*!!! that was a long sentence!!!) Hallenbeck has some serious "Issues", but i'm afraid they're not only about the movies he "Reviews". If we can't keep this site above the mindless chattering and foul mouthed posturing that has been on the rise latley, I for one will mourn the passing of a truly "Cool" site.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Aug 29, 1998 12:40:06 PM CDT

    Crtics fill a much needed gap.

    by sparky coletrain

    Come on Joe,

    Demographic? That is such bullshit,
    I will never understand why studios spend so much money on
    and people like yourself relying so heavily on marketing research.
    Its stupid. If you blow shit up and have a couple of muscle bound
    guys kickin each others ass your going to have your 17-29 males
    going crazy for it. If its got a spaceship in it your going to
    please the pocket protecting Capn' Kirk worshiping 35 year old
    virgins living in there mothers basements. Sure it would be great
    to see movies with the incredible writing, with nods to the gods
    of mythology like Campbell. But the truth is that ain't going to
    happen until you and the studios stop relying on "demographics".
    If the guys and gals in charge would let well enough alone things
    might be different but in the fabulous world of Hollywood where
    every studio heads favorite word is "rewrite" things are going
    to remain the same. The action flicks are going to have less and
    less character and more and more explosions. And as far as the
    quality of effects are concerened well you can thank the bottom
    line and the afore mentioned 35 year old virgins who own video
    toasters dragging down the quality because they lack a.)talent
    and b.)the price tags of F/X houses capable of producing quality work.
    In short there are going to be people who hate these movies and
    there are going to be people who love them and until we explain
    to the studios its not the genre or Kurts ailing tough guy routine
    but the their own fault these things tank. Until they stop spreading
    scripts around to multiple screenwriters (or at least let them
    talk to each other instead of just schlepping it on to them and
    saying this needs more umph and titty shots.) and the "demographics"
    stop reflecting the need for umph and tittys. We will continue to be
    swimming in that which I believe you refered to as having
    "Sucked dead donkey balls" (don't give a dime back to USC Joe,
    it looks as if you got your moneys worth.)

    Reply to Talkback

  • Aug 30, 1998 10:26:15 AM CDT

    hallenbeck and co.

    by severen

    Okay, just thought I'd state just where I stand on this whole thing as just about everyone else and their dog has. In short I think Hallenbecks reviews stink, and I'll tell you why. It's not the macho posturing or level of prophanity, it's not that he rips into just about every film that he reviews, or that he has questionable taste (in my opinion)...as far as I'm concerned none of this particularly bothers me, everyone has a right to their opinions, no matter what anyone else thinks of them. No, what really gets to me is when he presents his views as facts, and belittles anyone with a different opinion than his. This to me is the surest sign that his reviews aren't worth the time it takes to read them. I'm all for personal opinions, and I don't care how much I personally happen to agree or disagree with anyone elses, but when someone tells me that their opinion is law, and that what they say are the facts and anything that I might think on the subject isn't worth a pinch of shit, well that's where I draw the line, and that is what Hallenbeck does. Saying that you don't like a film is one thing, outright ripping it to shreds is fine if you feel that strongly about it's lack of worth, but don't lecture anyone else on how your opinions are right and theirs are wrong, because that just doesn't fly. All it does is make you look like an egotistical asshole. As far as I'm concerned Joe can continue to review films as he sees fit, just so long as he doesn't assume that his word is the only word that matters on the subject. I'll still go and see Soldier because I like Russell, and I think it might be a cool film. Afterwards I might love that film, I might hate it, but whatever thoughts I have about it I'll tell anyone who asks, I may even have heated debates over it's merits with other film fans, but I won't try to convince anyone who disagrees with my opinion that they are wrong or stupid for having a different viewpoint, I'll have my opinion and they will have theirs and thats the way it should be. My advice to Joe Hallenbeck is to learn the difference between presenting something as a personal opinion and presenting something as a fact, there's nothing wrong with having opinions, just don't presume to tell me mine.

    Oh, and just because someone can quote John C. McGinley from Platoon ("excuses are like assholes, everybody's got one...") doesn't make them king reviewer of the universe, but hell...that's just my opinion.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Aug 31, 1998 8:33:29 AM CDT

    sorry bud Joe just mopped your ass up pussy.

    by eli dorsey

    I'm just giving joe props on spanking Rosebud's bare ass with a spiked bat in that verbal fisticuffs

    Reply to Talkback

  • Sep 04, 1998 9:58:16 AM CDT

    Joe Sucks Cock

    by uncle skip

    Joe, you are such a loser.

    Wait, let me rephrase that in a way you can understand: "Joe, you sure do suck a lot of dicks and get fucked in your ass a lot."

    I am drawing these conclusions from your obvious affinity for male genitalia and your fascination with making Bud your "lil' bitch".

    Joe is probably an obese milk-dud-oholic who finds his only companionship from characters on the big screen. If they make him feel warm and fuzzy, he gets the temporary illusion that he is loved, if not, the movie must suck. When the movie ends, he has to face the reality that he is a mad fat guy all alone in the world thus he takes his aggressions against reality out on the movies. I bet Joe would get his ass kicked if confronted by Bud.

    Why should we "TRUST" Joe "ON THIS ONE"?

    Joe Hallenbeck= Man who has never had pussy.

    Fuck you Joe for being such a loser.

    You are almost as much a loser as Paul Tatara (the idiot that writes shitty reviews for CNN.com).

    Reply to Talkback

  • Sep 04, 1998 10:03:23 AM CDT

    Joe, you are dead

    by god almighty

    Joe Hallenbeck, prepare for your "reward" in the bowels of Hell. there you will have the pleasure of listening to 24 hours, 7 days a week of radio excerpts of NASCAR piped throughout Hell. You will be subjected to watching Soldier and Fargo everyday of your miserable life.

    BTW, Jesus says Fuck You Joe.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Jun 16, 2006 7:14:25 AM CDT

    Pity about getting Joe busted and everything

    by seppukudkurosawa

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