6 Deliciously Bizarre FreakShow One-Sheets For CHARLIE & THE CHOCOLATE FACTORY!

This will not be very good.

When it said they were freakish, I was really expecting worse... these are actually the most sane official images I have seen come from the movie yet. I didn't know much about the production so it is nice to see they are keeping all the same characters. Charlie looks like a good casting call... very rosy-cheeked and noble looking. All in all, I'm impressed!

This is the kind of film Tim Burton was meant for. Not Batman. He's a great director...but he just wasnt the right choice for Batman.

Veruca Salt looks like Christina Ricci (n/t)

only four of them are guys, who's the fifth?

I like very much. Fuckin' Augustus looking like a cherubic Mr. Creosote -- and Violet, I've never seen her so creepy. The expressions on the kids are just perfect, particularly Mike Teevee and Veruca Salt. A very happy recognizer am I.

I like the strategically placed blueberries on Violet's poster. And the nuts on Veruca's.

Er, but not for the same reasons as the aforementioned Mr Jackson. Shamone!

...with the video game controller to make it more modern. Now if they could only make one kid a suburbanite who is way too into hip-hop culture. www.theletterd.blogspot.com

Uh-oh - did I say that, or just think it?

..Mr. Furious. Perhaps Jamie Kennedy's B-Rad will be eviscerated by feral Oompa Loompas in a DVD extra. As for me, I'm pretty pleased with these images, but could have done without the taglines under each character. Is there really anyone going into this movie who hasn't read the book or at least seen the original adaptation? The images sell the characters without a word beyond their names. But I know that's a marketing thing and not necessarily reflective of anything going on in the movie itself. From what I've seen, I have no cause to fret about this production.

Can't wait for this movie. The Gene Wilder version was great and all, don't get me wrong, but I think this one will be great in it's own way, especially if they are sticking closer to the book and showing scenes that weren't in the first adaptation. Already the trailer showed a bit of the scene of Willy Wonka in the jungle finding his special cocoa beans and discovering the Oompa Loompas.

Just read on IMDB.com that Marilyn Manson wanted the role of Willy REAL BAD, and Tim agreed to it until scheduling problems arose between the two of them. Now THAT would've been beautiful...

I know you guys are lenient with what you allow posted, which is cool of you, free speech and all. But this is now the 2nd talkback I've seen about a movie with kids(Sharkboy and Lavagirl was the 1st) with guys making what are basically pedophile jokes. If someone was making rape jokes you'd probably consider that over the line, and this is essentially the same thing. I'm thinking you may want to nip this in the bud before it becomes common, and the balls already rolling.

But since I'm 28 and ummm... forget everything I just said, I really don't want a Veruca poster.

Just knuckleheads making crude jokes. Oh and by the way, I saw your little sister (or daughter, niece, whatever) the other day and man is she a piece of ass. I'd sure love to bend her over.

It's a long-standing tradition for the basement dwellers to make sick and creepy comments about children. Apparently some people think it's funny. What is really reveals is a deep pshychological fear of women.

Are racist jokes okay in here? How about ragging on the handicapped? Please let me know.

What the fuck is it with you red-neck right-wing, brainless spastics? Michael Jackson is innocent until proven otherwise. Stop crucifying an innocent man. Judge not lest ye be judged.

i don't see any overly crude comments here - and none anywhere close to crossing any sort of line. you are extrapolating some dirty thoughts from petty observations. obviously there are some issues you have concerning children in general. please seek some help. that said, take a look at the poster of Violet. now, how can you not say that the photo has been manipulated and color-enhanced to give the girl an extreme "serpentine" look. some might consider "serpentine" synonymous with "sexy," as crude as it may be. no Talkbackers are at fault for viewing it that way. it was clearly designed to draw people to her heavy make-up on the eyes. what is she, 11? 12? if you should attack anybody, go after the studio who is trying to sell her that way. and while you're at it, remind them about how they pawned off Hilary Duff's boobs when she was 15.

Red neck right win brainless spastics??? Of course Jackson is innocent until proven guilty and he is having his day in court. I might add that he has the best lawyers money can buy (the lat Mr. Cochran was his attorney when he settled out of court on molestation charges a decade ago) which will greatly increase his chances of acquital. Fortune favors the rich. To say that Jackson is an innocent man after years of accusations is just naive. Each time Jackson gets off the hook he is allowed to allegedly abuse more kids.

... didn't know they reformed. Are they having a reunion tour like the Pixies? IS "Seether" on the Wonka soundtrack?....oh.... NEVERmind....

I do hope you realize that the band "Veruca Salt" named themselves after the character from this movie, and not vice versa...

...and whoever is defending Mike...come on already! He is innocent until proven guilty IN A COURT OF LAW! NOT A COURT OF PUBLIC OPINION. The man has issues. He has had these issues for a VERY LONG TIME and NO ONE has done a DAMN THING ABOUT IT! His family, his "famous" "friends", his lawyers and agents...let alone any retarded (yes, I threw that in on purpose just so we could have some handicapped bashing as well...yaaaaay!!!) parents that let their kids stay the night their after Mike bought off the first kid he molested for $20 MILLION!!!! Mike is guilty and he needs help. There is no way around this. Somebody should have helped the man a long time ago...but then his money would have stopped flowing into their pockets.

...and I live on the west coast, am anti-Bush, and have a graduate degree. Of course, I'm also posting on a fanboy website in the middle of the afternoon.

...that I am seeing this movie strictly based on the fact that it's Johnny and Tim. Which is not to say that I don't think it will be good. It's just a movie that has not really grabbed me at any point of it's production. I love the original and nothing will ever change that - so I'm just going into this looking at it as a Johnny and Tim movie. And I usually love movies from either of them. Much more looking forward to the Corpse Bride and Pirates 2 though in regards to both of those fellows.

...of the talkback and then coming back in with a fresh perspective, I think the most over-the-line comment concerning pedophilia has come from oceansized with his offer to bend over someone's daughter/sister/etc. Lighten the hell up. Nobody even made the poor taste remark about how in certain southern states she'd be okay because she's old enough to cut her own meat. I'm all for being respectful and sensitive, but if you honestly think anything anyone else has said in here is over any line, then your perspective has been sadly warped by years of PC brainwashing. And, for the record, racial and hadicapped jokes pepper these boards all the time. Few take them seriously. Fewer still are offended by them. Do me a favor and pop into the Palindromes talkback, okay oceansized? I haven't seen anyone's head explode in weeks.

If the white glove don't fit, you must acquit.

These are great and they get more freaky as you go down the list. I just can't wait to see this.

And it's because Slugworth won't be in the movie because Slugworth isn't in the book. He was a total dramatic creation by the screenwriters of the Gene Wilder version. (Although, admittedly a good one since it set up the scene at the end where Charlie gives the gobstopper back despite getting screwed.) Without all that stuff, one wonders if the new version will have any dramatic arc for Charlie. Still, Burton and Depp. I'm there opening day.

With that brilliant logic, you can justify finding a picture of a kid sexy, or any other idea your feeble little noodle comes up with. Oh and by the way, I don't have any particular issue about kids, but I admit I do have an issue with the overabundance of idiots that seem to be populating the world.

MM would have been GOD as WW. Dammit, now I'll never forget what almost was. Not to downplay Depp at all... but seriously, Manson as Wonka woulda kicked more ass than I am able to comprehend right now.

I must admit I noticed in the trailer that Veruca Salt is highly sexualised. The hair and makeup are designed to send "sex" signals to the male brain but they have been applied to a child. Don't blame normal men who get confusing signals, blame the studio who try to sell the film with jail-bait.

...I meant Violet.

have you ever seen him visit sick little girls? Or lavishly spend time and money with girls as he has done with boys? Now whether he actually does anything with these boys remains to be seen. Oceansized, if you can prove that the majority of TB'ers/readers/whoever are actually offended then you can moan about this kind of thing. But in reality, most people just don't give a flying fuck what is said. But if you want to waste your time, typing out your little rants, go for it. Just know that most people will stop reading them after a while and carry on regardless. Happy postings.

And something tells me the world will get the resemblence and this movie will flop.

Childe Roland, I was making a point with what I said, and you just took it out of context (I knew some moron might do that). And Shiney Mcshine, I don't find Rob Schnieder or Chris Kattan funny either, that doesn't mean I have no sense of humor. Here's an analogy for those of you took what I said as a personal attack. Finding pedophilia funny is the equivalent of watching an old carnival freakshow: basically "Hey look what a high tolerance I have. And if you don't like this too, you just know how the world is like I do."

Is crunchy on the outside with a gooey chewy center.

I love Mazza but he is the laziest son-of-a-bitch in the music business after Trent Reznor. Rumours of his involvement in a Wonka film have been going on since his Portrait album where, coincidentally, track 1 is the boat trip speech from the Wilder film. If he really was offered the role he would of quit anything he was involved in to do it but i doubt he's ever been offered the role unless the studio wanted to battle Middle America's Christians over this film and make it unmarketable for it's target audience, that being children.

ahh, i see. since you resort to random name-calling, you simply want to start a fight. i never learn about feeding trolls like yourself - you just get bigger and uglier, it seems. clip your coupons, curse the traffic, make fun of what's on TV, and die alone.

First of all, guys, take it easy on Oceanic. It's obviously Sean Penn behind the name. I mean, the guy lost his funny bone. It's a serious medical condition. But seriously, they are just jokes, get over them. I'm of the South Park political party that says, make fun of everything, and therefore you single out nothing. People make fat jokes on here. People make racist jokes on here. People insult everything on here, including the site they are WRITING ON! I mean, give it up and ignore what you want to ignore. Also, I'm from down in South FL where the weather guy got caught in a pedophile sting operation. And I work in TV news. I knew the guy. And, lemmie tell ya, pedophiles don't make JOKES about being a pedophile. It's just how it is. There's no danger. All that said, I am still worried about this movie. I love Tim Burton and I love Johnny Depp. But with the small exceptions of Veruca and the squirells/nuts instead of the egss, Slugworth being an actual character, and Mike T.V.'s update into a video game nut, what changes were made to the book in the original that are being rectified here. And, for that matter, what is different in the LOOK of this film. THe biggest change, I felt, in the original movie was Wonka. In the book he's a short, goateed, leprechaun like guy. A circus carnival barker. A sheister. I LOVE Wilder's Wonka, but he's not the book wonka. They had a shot with Depp, especially if he was in Ed Wood mode (Ed Wood and WIlly Wonka are similar characters)...but instead, in what we've seen in the trailers, he comes across as some sort of valley girl Isabella Rosellini. The look is bad. The voice is bad. Does not bode well in my opinion. Hopefully, it's just poor advertising, but, come to think of it, the movie comes out this summer. Where's a real trailer? Hmmmm? Something tells me screeners of this did not go over well and they are reworking.

But you may notice my original post was to the talkback administrators. I thought they might care about keeping some level of integrity on their site. And you seem to think the best response to overt stupidity is indifference, but I think that's precisely why it runs so rampant. The only reason there are fewer overt racists in the world than there used to be is because racism started being frowned upon. Food for thought.

the originators of indifference on this site. You're on the internet my friend, you are not going to be changing anyone's opinion on anything. No matter how pretty your words are. Good luck!

HAHAHAHAHHAHAHA.... I guess you haven't been visiting this site for very long and/or often. Heh.

Ok, not really.

And Homergater, I happen to be a huge South Park fan and I don't think you get the shows humor at all. It's not about "making fun of everything" but making fun of the ignorant attitudes about a given topic. If they ever do an episode on pedophilia, they'll probably make of fun of dimwits who think joking about it is funny.

was "how long until the pervs staart posting about Veruca being 'Hot'"? ....... Then I read the talkback and realized it had already started. Not that I'm condemning, I thought Michelle Trachtenberg was hot three years ago.

Violet definitely bears a resemblance to a young Ms. Portman. So while I wouldn't consider her 'hot' now, I definitely see where a beautiful girls situation could happen.

I guess I'm one of the only people who look at the books and think this could be a better adaptation of them than the Wilder one was.

That is all.

I'm sure the kids are fine. However in my mind, the biggest question marks remain Burton and the casting of Depp. They will make or break this movie..... As far as MJ goes, yeah the guy's a freakish weirdo, but for the truly curious, I recommend picking up the latest issue of Rolling Stone. After reading that article, I have serious doubts about the validity of the present charges.

I read this article and it is hardly objective. Rolling Stone likes to protect its own. Look at Eminem. Can RS be bigger apologists for that guy? If Toby Keith wrote the things about gays and women that Eminem has, Rolling Stone would have an aneurism about it.

I'll just say it's been interesting. I wasn't surprised that certain less-than-intelligent individuals took what I said as an attack on them. But that others found me unusual for not being indifferent on the matter was surprising and sort of disappointing. Oh well, I'll have to keep going against the grain on this one. And for those still dismissing me be saying I have no sense of humor, see my freakshow analogy from an earlier post.

I am still laughing from Aust1n's comment on Michael Jackson. Violet looks great. I'm so happy to see Tim Burton enjoying his cinematic playground. I felt badly for him when "Planet of the Apes" went sour in it's last half (the first half of the film was quite good). I admire his visionary sense and I also agree that the themesong to the trailer is addictive... I watched it a dozen times in a row on the first day. This'll be a fun movie no matter what!

Honestly, I have laughed here in my office several times reading these posts. Most of the humorous posts were intended to be funny. But not all...

He's an experimental artist after all.

And no, they're not handicapped

If your're still intereted, let me know. I'll hook you up.

He's been talking about how much he wanted to do Willy Wonka for years. He see's him as the devil tempting the children. Personally I think he should just be happy with his Mary Poppins portrayal and leave it at that.

*Blecchhhhh* Where are those damn administrators?

are handicapible!

Caught it on DVD a couple years back. Gene Wilder was fine but the Oopa-Loompas were annoying shits - worse than Jar Jar by a factor of at least 5 - that killed the movie for me. The new version, OTOH, looks divine. ^_^. Manson would have been good, but overall Depp will make a better Wonka than either him or Wilder, especially with Tim Burton at the helm, bringing his unique mix of neogothic/psychedelic bizzareness to the work. True fact - I didn't know *this* is where Veruca Salt got their name! I love that band (especially "Resolver.") Daaaaam. Toppu o Nerae!

His hair style is intoxicating! It's the kind of hair you can just grab with one hand, bend him over to take charge, and show 'em who's daddy. Followed by an ungentle slap on that small supple tight ass like it's Roy Rogers' horse Trigger. You yank his head back by his hair as you crisco up your pistol and let it fire away across his back as you realize, "GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO SEE THIS FILM!!!!". Then you snap out from your daydream to realize... you can't voice this kind of filth! This site has a pure moral reputation (see Harry's BLADE II review) to uphold!! oceansized... get off the cross, somebody else needs the wood ^.~

Based on some of the posts I've seen so far, I'd say there's already plenty of wood here.

Actually in this case, the Romans seem to have way too much of a problem with me saying it's wrong to look at little girls sexually. Have you all ever heard the expression "thou doth protest too much"? One might assume your all lusting after the elementary schools acroos the street from your mom's house because no woman your own age will give you the time of day. That why you mad, fellas? Gonna feel guilty jerking off to pictures of Hillary Duff in the basement tonight?

I don't know man. They've already printed a number of articles covering MJ's latest round of charges and this seemed to me to be the only one that made any attempt at discrediting his accusors.

At least she kind of looks like her in this picture. Which is fine with me. Can never get enough Debi Mazar!

As your legal representative the advice I am supposed to give is that 15 will get you 20. But since I will probably be in the cell next to you guys, I guess the advice is 1) If there is grass on the field, play ball. Or 2) If she's old enough to sit at the table, she's old enough to eat. Just kidding, I thought I would piss off all the Michael Jackson squabblers.

Just asking 'tis all...btw, I agree the expression on the Mike poster is outstanding. I'm a little concerned about the Violet one, though, kind of, um, piercing.

Depp's Wonka has worried me a little bit with the look they decided to give him (with the Elton John sunglasses and all), but the children casting is perfect. I love the new look they gave to Violet, and Veruca looks as snobby as ever. The only thing I'm not sure of is how this will play as a non-musical (last I heard). I guess taking out song-and-dance routines leaves more time for additional scenes from the book. I love the one-sheets that have come out so far for this film, I want to get them all! It would make such a great display. As for this whole pedophilia thread ... there's points to both sides, but oceansized, you've made a mountain out of a molehill, and it's become more of an attention-seeking rant you've been on than any valid mission to persuade AICN to remove non-threatening posts (no matter how stupid or unfunny) of other visitors. Jokes are made about sensitive, serious subjects all the time -- that's the point of them, to make light of something that is otherwise not so. If you don't find them funny, that's fine. There are plenty I don't find funny either, but they hurt no one. Well, except for you it seems ... but the only logical reason that one could have for being *SO* offended is if you were a victim of pedophilia yourself. In which case, I think you may be better off talking with a therapist than with anybody at this site. If you weren't, however, then why make such a fuss?

First of all, opinions on this issue have nothing to with anyone's political leanings... I'm as far as one can get from being right-wing or a redneck, and I'm convinced that MJ is guilty of some degree of inappropriate behavior towards children... Second, whether or not he actually molested any children has not been proven, but by his own admission he shares his bed with them (which would be enough to get any other man his age in some serious trouble) and by his own deeds and words has shown time and again that he has an obsession with children, childhood, youth, the Peter Pan story, etc. ...I mean, anyone (Rebublican, Democrat, cowboy, hippie, red-stater, blue-stater, Black, White, Gay, Straight, male, female, anyone) can look at this guy's lifestyle and see that he is probably next in line behind Victor Salva for NAMBLA's Entertainer of the Year Award... Pan out.

That movie was, like, the epitome of coolness when I was a wee lad back in the days when Michael Jackson was still black and an actual little boy instead of only in his mind. Willy wonka and Chitty Chitty Bang Bang (Dick Van Dyke's greatest achievement) were _the_ cool thing in those pre-Star Wars years. Well, them and the old Star Trek cartoons. And the original Vampirella - Creepy - Eerie b&w comics. Aah, nostalgia.

I think people's love for the Gene Wilder version will hinder thier love for the Johnny Depp Wonka.. not because it's not good, but because it's not Gene Wilder.. Is it me? or does MIKE TEE-VEE look like the lead singer from Green Day?.. Violet, Charlie, Augustus and Veruca are great casting (looks wise.. talent is yet to be seen).. I wanna see pics of the 'parental figures' I don't suppose anyone has seen a pic of them or can direct me to a site that has them? I am curious to have a look.. Cheers big ears.

Reminds me of those old Armageddon one-sheets...

Have you seen how unstable his is now, during the trial?

But, seriously, there's nothing special about these posters. Or the Madagascar character posters. Or the Robots character posters. It's all about slapping the movie title in as many places as possible around the theater lobby (name recognition is half the battle).

Mr. Pondsized and his Moral Minority of One may not like it but there is (so far) no law against making jokes, no matter how tasteless, offensive, or downright stupid. I would rather see a few tasteless or offensive jokes here than see any kind of censorship of posts. The only exception that would be acceptable would be anything specifically libelling an individual by name (public figures such as MJ notwithstanding) or actual illegal threats. Jokes and parody are given lots of leeway from a legal standpoint -- witness what they get away with on Family Guy, the Howard Stern show, and so on. Basically if it offends you, leave!

Lookin' good. Does anyone know if this version is set in America or England??

A missed opportunity.

I'm surprised Michael Jackson hasn't made more of an issue abot being the "oppressed black man" like Kobe did. The race card works wonders, as well as the millions of dollars he has to get all the attorney's, etc. to get his sick skinny ass acquited. He deserves the be beaten to death with a crowbar if he really touched children or had them touch him in any appropriate way. There really is very little in this world that is lower than a child molestor. As far as the movie goes, Johnny Depp rocks as an actor but I don't know how this movie is going to turn out. I'd rather have him instead of devil-worshipping Marilyn Manson (who probably would take some sick pleasure out of it, who knows) but honestly this movie could seriously suck.

pint-sized stated in the first desperate grab for attention:"free speech and all". Go sell your pathetic bullshit somewhere else. Yeah, free speech and all. Douchebag. Don't like puerile jokes? Leave. Can't figure out how to write to the administrator or Harry directly? There's a shock, ya ponce. Get fucked.

That's one sexy broad. She definitely needs to get her fine ass some femme fatale roles.

check out Missi Pyle, who's in C&TCF...

http://thepsychotic.web1000.com/

good fucking job! Those mp3s are awesome. Glad I got em before Lucasfilm threatens death.

Where is Debi Mazar? I wish I could say that she was in my bedroom, but I can't. She was in "Be Cool" but not much else unless you count the Grand Theft Auto games, and that Jackie Chan movie from a few years back. Too bad. I love that girl. As for Missi Pyle, she is cute. Not what I look for. Debi seems to be channeling Betty Page, also a favorite of the Kdoc! But Miss Pyle isn't bad. Not bad at all. I'd hit it.

What seems misunderstood is that I was intitally just presenting the AICN people with an "if I were you" scenario. And since the slackjaws in here jumped to all sorts of conclusions, I'll state for the record that I'm all for free speech and believe in all your rights to be as stupid as you want to be. Let me put it in a way your little noodles can maybe understand: people have the right to make racist remarks, but if I was running an establishment (be it a restarant or even a website) I wouldn't allow it. THAT'S BASICALLY WHAT I SAID IN MY ORIGINAL POST. I happen to think stupid people are shown far too much tolerance and the worlds worse off because of it. And evidently anyone whose intolerant of the idiot tribe (which seems to have many members coming to this site) is called a puritan and accused of having no sense of humor. At least now I know the resistance that exists. All you members of the tribe can rest assured that you have great strength in numbers.

Does it really matter if he did it or not? He's a fucking freak, who cares?! I see it on the news, I turn the channel. I hear it on the radio, I turn the station. I see a talkback subject about it, I don't read it. I really don't know why this circus is so intruiging to the masses (and I'm not pointing fingers). There are more important things in my life right now than to have dinner conversations about some would-be pedophile that I don't know. I'd much rather talk about Carla Gugino's smokin hot body that I saw on Sin City last weekend. Now that's a topic worth discussing!

Actually, they did an ep about pedophiles. Cartman and NAMBLA, perhaps you just missed it? And I have to side with the idea that SOuth Park IS making fun of everyone. And I mean EVERYONE. Matt and Trey are irreverent to the extreme, which is one of the reasons their show is still funny, even if not as funny as it was a few seasons ago.

or does Slugworth in the original film look like Rudolph Guiliani?

That seems to be more fitting for the character. Incidentally, this thing is going to obviously be dark and weird and I expect a number of walkouts from disturbed families.

How do you know when it's bedtime at Neverland ranch? The big hand is on the little hand. Let the flame war begin!

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