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New AMITYVILLE HORROR Trailer Hits Online - and it's all sorts of heebie jeebies!
Hey folks, Harry here with the newest AMITYVILLE HORROR remake trailer. Now, I know some of you seem to be under some odd delusion that the original film wasn't scary. But I watched the original the other night over here in my fortress of solitude and man... all the lights off... empty - strange place... stuck with a broken leg... strange noises walking on the ceiling - boards creaking.... "GEEEETTTT OUUUUUUUUT" flies, fucking with the catering money, bloody doggy scratches on the basement wall, the house bitchslapping Rod in the collar constantly through the film... messing with the crucifix... that babysitter in the closet sequence that leaves her bloody... Going back in after that useless friggin mutt. Dammit, I love that film. The music, the look, that house. All of it.
And now there's this remake. And you look at it. And this time - they're showing some of what they're doing beyond what was done in the original and I like most of it. Except... I don't like the mother actually getting to talk to that priest. One of the things I loved about the original is how the house just always fucked that part up. Be it phone communication, car problems, something to keep them at the house or distract it. But otherwise... I really like what I see in the trailer. It looks like a valiant effort, hopefully it'll be a success. Looks cool.
Be prepared for Creepy Ass AMITYVILLE music in this Trailer! Very Cool!
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it aint lookin so hot. Buncha shock scares, that shit wears thin quickly.
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Not bad, I hope he still saves the dog!
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HOT DAMN!!!! FRESH MOVIE GOODNESS!!!! THERE IS NUTTIN LIKE AN AGENCY BROWN-NOSING HACK GETTING HIS FIRST FILM!!! THAT SCREAMS MOVIE GOODNESS!!!! THIS IS GONNA BE THE BESTEST THING SINCE ANY OTHER FUCKING HORROR FILM THAT COMES AND GOES IN A SINGLE WEEK!!!! WAIT- - - DOES IT HAVE LAME SITCOM STARS???? IT DOES!!! THE ACTOR FROM THREE GIRLS AND A PIZZA!!!! HE WAS THE SHIT IN THAT OTHER ACTION DRACULA MOVIE....WASN'T HE????? AND A GIRL FROM A GUEST STINT ON ALIAS????? HOT FUCKIN SHIT!!!!! THIS IS GONNA BE SO GODDAMN GREAT!!!! WHEN CAN I GET IN LINE???? CAN I GET IN LINE NOW????? FOR ALL THAT IS FUCKING HOLY...LET ME GET IN LINE!!!! I GOTTA SEE THIS QUICK BEFORE IT GOES TO VIDEO!!!!! WHY O WHY O WHY DOES THE FUCKING STUDIO MAKE ME WAIT???? WHYYYYYYY????????....And thus, will there be a tie in on a reality show? - - - George, The 7th Chicken!!!!
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WELL FUCK ME!!!! THIS HAS ELEVEN PRODUCERS!!!!! THAT PROVES IT IS THE BESTEST POSSIBLE FILM EVER FUCKING PUT TO FILM!!!! THEY WILL HAVE TO BURN EVERY MOVIE EVER MADE BECAUSE THEY WILL ALL LOOK LIKE SHIT IN THE WORLD OF THIS GREATNESS!!!! STOP MAKING ME WAIT FOR THIS!!!! I GOTTA SEE IT NOW!!!! NOW - I SAY - NOW!!!!!!!...And thus, if they had 12 producers they get a discount! - - - George, The 7th Chicken!!!!
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"The library cop's name is Mr. Bookman?!" Anyway, here we go, another horror film that uses the over-baked quick-edit, effect, that makes people move fast and all creepy-like. It was good during House on Haunted Hill, but two seconds after that debacle ended, that effect ran its course. The music here is cool, as it was in the original. But, I have a little problem with the credit that says, "From Michael Bay, director of The Texas Chainsaw Massacre." I think some qualification to that is in order, but I guess its an attempt to win credibility with "today's" horror fans. Oh well. I'll see it of course, just to pay tribute to the original, but I don't have to enjoy it. By the way, they debunked that crud about Amityville being based on a true story years ago. The origial was still good, and even more scary under the guise of being an authentic tale. Still, the promotion here is little sketchy. Oh well, contemporary film I guess.
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...my irony-o-meter just exploded!!!
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Why did they change Jody into a ghost girl? This sucks. The rest looks pretty good, though.
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...was that giant redbug lookin' thingie that climbed up the side of the tool shed supposed to be? Instead of a priest, maybe they should just call the Orkin man!
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Didn't they say that the whole haunting thing was bullshit along time ago?
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I think I'll be pushy today...
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...on the money about Amityville already having been remade by way of Poltergeist. A far superior film complete with its own creepy circumstances surrounding the actress who played young Carol Ann. The best part of the original Amityville was Kidder's gratuitous nudity. And in retrospect, that kind of makes me queasy (I keep imagining her naked and running through someone's yard now). This yet another completely unnecessary remake from the brain trust that is Hollywood.
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Yeah, this whole turned out to be made up on a drunken binge (of course, they don't mention that in trailer, do they)
I was hoping to see a cameo of Babe as the Demon Pig Jody. -
Feb 25, 2005 10:50:26 AM CST
Fast moving weird looking folkes still scare the s*** out of me!
by judge doom
Damn, those things with erratic movements aren
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Harry, you are such a pussy.
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Jodie was a PIG!!!
I can hear the studio execs now... 'What's scary about a pig? I'll tell you what's scary - little girls with long, black wet hair that stand in the dark and run past mirrors really fast-like! That's what's scary right now! That'll fill seats!! THAT'S the ticket!!!'
The fact that that Jodie was a pig... that's EXACTLY what made it scary. Whether the book was true or not, it was still creepy.
Who knows? might still be good though. -
Feb 25, 2005 11:24:42 AM CST
Jesse James is listed in the credits...is this the same doucheba
by atticus finch
Hope not.
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Apparently, the Lutz's may have been over their head when they purchased the place. A mention about it was even made in the original movie, I believe. They supposedly used the Haunted House thing to get out of the deal. I saw something on Sci-Fi with the Lutz's and all the other people involved, as well. Pretty good stuff as everyone was trying to prove or disprove the story. Apparently, there were some strange and untimely deaths related to people being involved with Jay Anson's book--including the author.
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...Meh! They're just undercranked.
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Right now my wife and I are trying to get into a house that's in a very competitive market and mortgage companies will lend you roughly 30% of your gross take home pay. Which is your maximum, the bank will have no problem giving yout he maximum but you have to figure out HOA and PMI and bills, etc.. so essentially you want to aim for about 20 to 25% of your gross salary to sink into a house. Obviously the Lutz family didn't do that.. but honestly, if the story is made up or what.. It's sorta entertaining. I'm sure it'll be alot scarier than Boogeyman but probably less scarier than Son of the Mask.
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Sorry, I meant to say 70% or your gross take home pay.. and you should have for lower because that'll max you out..
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http://www.tpu.fi/~t4jlaaks/ep3/
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The book DID have a ghost kid in it...as well as Jody...I bet the movie will have both...and, yes, it's been debunked. But it's still fodder for good scares...
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Hey, does anyone remember Mr. Morrisette in that terrible Nickelodeon "soap-opera" called "Thirteen" back in the day? Back when Nickelodeon would outsource their programming to Canadian TV shows.. He needed some braces, looks like he got them.. and now he's a big star and bangin' a hot musician.. and all I can do is post a comment on his movie... I hate my life..
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WOW! They it looked like they really pulled it off this time. The R rating, the mood, the actors. I cannot WAIT to see this. If the movie is HALF as good as the trailer - man, why dosn't hollywood make more films like this?
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...THAT would make a pretty entertaining film. SHow how these desperate people scammed their way out of the mortgage and how the only real recourse for the bank was to turn the thing into a tourist attraction. You could do the whole thing from the POV of an actual ghost residing in the home who nobody can see or hear and who is just laughing his ectoplasmic ass off at how lame the Lutz's manufactured haunting is. It'd be like Beetlejuice meets The Grifters meets The Money Pit.
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Feb 25, 2005 2:22:24 PM CST
Looks way too Hollywood.... Why does a horror movie have to loo
by jennababe
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you're quite the douchebag yourself, aren't you? Sorry I didn't know that there was only one Jesse James that could possibly be in this movie. But then again, I don't spend evey second in mommy and daddy's basement like you so obviously do. Dumbass.
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Feb 25, 2005 3:35:38 PM CST
Harry, you really thought the original Amityville was scary?
by lance rock
I thought it was a bore. Really, the only time I was scared was in the opening credits (those kids' voices are creepy), and when the realtor is climbing the stairs and they do that freaky 70's-era freeze frame on her.
Otherwise, I thought it resembled a bland tv movie, down to the laughable cinematography. -
I finally figured out who the hell you guys were talking about when you said "Mr. Morrisette". Should have been obvious. Oh well, there are parts of this trailer I liked and parts that I loathed (the parts that looked like every other recent horror film from Darkness Falls to Boogeyman). I think that means I'm going to sit this one out.
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All I remember is my nerves being shot waiting for something to happen that never did.
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Was a TV movie. Devil Dog: The Hound from Hell. Starring Richard Crenna. No shit. An don't laugh at me. I was a wee little freshman of popular culture at the time. :-(
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Yeah, there's a white coating everywhere, but that ain't ice.
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yeah they should have gone the porcine route ... enough with the spooky kids already!
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Thanks for that one - brightened up a crappy Friday night. The original was shite, but seems like "Battleship Potemkin" compared to the sequels. Remember the hideous "Amityville 3-D" and the stuffed swordfish above the fireplace? "Oooh I wonder why they keep cutting to that every 12 seconds. Do you think it'll...? Naw..." Oh yes, it did. Anyway, the remake will make its money back efficiently enough, but for a scary house movie just waiting to be made - anyone read "House of Leaves" by Mark Danielewski?
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I didn't mean to be a prick, but I guess I was. Sarcasm and humor are sometimes hard to figure when it comes in type. No hard feelings, I hope.
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Ya know...with all the changes, pretty soon this web page will be back to normal.
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It was my first R-Rated film too...and I hear this all the time from other gen-x'rs. The original movie was almost like some sort of childhood rite of passage. I was 9. But unlike your experience, it scared the holy crap out of me. Now I can objectively see it for the bad movie it is, but it still gets to me on some base level even now.
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Someone in Hollywood should run with it, that shit would rock. Especially if you got Jim Carrey to play the father and Bruce Campbell to be the ghost. Ooh, and let Wes Anderson
direct - either him or the Coens. Probably the Coens. -
Feb 26, 2005 4:30:11 PM CST
Oompa_Radar is right about Childe Roland being right about Coffe
by ribbons
That said, I liked 'The Amityville Horror.' But 'Poltergeist' was better.
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The Matrix Revolutions (whoo). Underrated movie. Oh, I've wasted my life.
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Anyway, the original book & flick were "Big Deals." This, obviously, comes as an afterthought. Yeah, it was bogus (the actual event), but what's wrong with an urban legend? This actually looks kinda interesting, and at least the mofo's didn't go to Canada to shoot it. Anyone remember that the original Lutz family claimed the damn "spirit" followed them out West (hoping for another best seller, no doubt)?? Anyone born after 68 probably doesn't realize what a big deal the story was when it first came out. Hell, I even remember an episode of "That's Incredible," with John Davidson wandering around the original house, and pointing out all the false claims. Also, I may be wrong, but doesn't the credit card say "from Michael Bay......AND the director (blah, blah, blah)?? Again, like the reuse of the original score in the trailer - it may not be in the film. (I hate the Kodak Theater.)
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Looks like every other lame-ass 21st C., big budget, committee-developed horror movie. Next?
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Feb 28, 2005 9:23:53 PM CST
Actually, delusional is thinking the original was indeed scary.
by thecat
And they are remaking it? Hey, if they actually get anyone to pay money for a remake of such a horrible, horrible film, God Bless them, they deserve every penny.
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Must I remind everyone.......remakes are LESS common now than they were in Hollywood's past. During the 30s/40s/50s, you often saw the same script rehashed more than twice. And if you think "committee filmmaking" wasn't present during the Golden Age, then you don't know your film history.
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