June 4, 2004, 5:35 p.m. CST
Hi. I'm first. After I actually READ this article, I'll post comments. :) yes, this is satire.
June 4, 2004, 5:38 p.m. CST
June 4, 2004, 5:58 p.m. CST
by maxwell's hammer
I was at the original BNAT when "Pitch Black" was screened, and mind you, this was several months prior to its theatrical release. I remember the way the Alamo Draft House went nuts for this movie. It was so amazing, because we as an audience knew absolutely nothing about it, or what to expect. Flash forward a few months, i see the first preview for it in a theater, and I'll be damned if the trailer didn't give away what made the movie so amazing. It went ahead and spoiled that really cool little plot twist about the eclipse and those funky night creatures. My then college roommate was underwhelmed, and I have to say, so was I. Why can't studios leave some of that element of surprise and discovery in the movie and not give it all away in the previews? Sunuvubich.
June 4, 2004, 6 p.m. CST
This film is gonna b awsome im glad theve given Twohy a chance 2 really shine buy giving him complete freedom and with a fuckign massive budget. Pitch black was 1 of the best looking and exciting cult films of the last few yrs and his film below was grt. I can only see good thigns coming outta this flick and from the sound of it it has brains unliek that evil pill of dull shit the day after tommorw.
June 4, 2004, 6:01 p.m. CST
WHADDA YA MEAN I GOTTA USE MY BRAIN????? I NEED TO THINK???? THAT WILL INTERFERE WITH MY BLIND CONSUMING OF MASSES AMOUNT OF PRODUCT!!!! I NEED TO JUST BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY CONSUME CONSUME CONSUME CONSUME!!!!! I CAN'T TAKE THE TIME TO ACTUALLY DECIDE IF I WANT TO SEE IT!!!! HOLLYWOOD TELLS ME THAT I COULD GET CANCER FROM THINKING!!!!! I NEED TO BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY CONSUME CONSUME CONSUME!!!!! LOOK!!! MORE SHREK!!!! I NEED TO GIVE IT MY MONEY BEFORE IT GETS A WEEK OLD!!!!! OH MY FUCKING GOD!!! HERE'S SOME HARRY POTTER!!!! QUICK!!! THROW SOME MONEY AT IT!!!!! MORE MONEY!!! LET ME PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE BE THE FIRST ONE ON MY BLOCK TO GIVE IT MORE MORE MORE MONEY!!!!!!!...And thus, I still have a little pocket change! - - - George, The 7th Chicken!!!!
June 4, 2004, 6:35 p.m. CST
by Lenny Nero
Say it ain't so.
June 4, 2004, 6:39 p.m. CST
Now Riddick could be great, but I'm tired of Moriarty sucking up to people in the business to feel like he's a"player." This is the man that said "The Punisher," was the best things he's ever seen and thought that "Real-World," New Line movie about spring break was great...and that's just off the top of my head. Harry, Beaks, Quint, Capone, Herc, you guys are great. Moriarty, your a joke.
June 4, 2004, 7:08 p.m. CST
But we can all hope "Mortal Kombat 3" is good!
June 4, 2004, 7:12 p.m. CST
Summers been pretty blah so far, hope this spices things up.
June 4, 2004, 7:31 p.m. CST
Pitch Black is crapulent and so will be its offspring!!! And when was the last time you spent $10 on a film???
June 4, 2004, 7:32 p.m. CST
by Insane Tiki
I don't know if I'll see Riddick in the theaters or not, but based off of Moriarty's review, I'm more inclined. It's good to see a review on this site that actually gives real reasons why a film is good, instead of a "review" that just gushes and gushes about how AWESOMELY GEEKY AND COOL a film is for eighteen paragraphs. I'm as big a fan of stuff like man-in-suit Godzilla and Bruce Campbell as anyone else, but that's not always the best reason to spend money to see a movie.
June 4, 2004, 7:46 p.m. CST
This sounds wonderful and I would get my butt in the seat even if buzz was bad, but I SO want this film to be good. Hope Morty is right...please please please please please.
June 4, 2004, 8:33 p.m. CST
by drew mcweeny
... show me where I said THE PUNISHER was one of the best things ever. I enjoyed it for what it was... a very small-scale action film with no CGI, something that is increasingly rare these days. And I liked Thomas Jane in the lead role. If you're a fan of the comic and disagree, it may well be because of comparisons to the book, which I've never really read. And if you didn't think THE REAL CANCUN was funny, sue me. Seriously. Let's go to court, and you can sue me. Of course, that's assuming you actually saw it, which I did, and yeah... I laughed. See, I do this weird thing... I actually go into every movie hoping for the best, and I give them all a chance. I know... very controversial technique when deciding what to enjoy, especially among fanboys, but I'm wacky that way.
June 4, 2004, 8:45 p.m. CST
by drew mcweeny
... because if we disagree on two films, then you should never like anything I like again. That means you're not allowed any Kubrick, any Kurosawa, any Coen Bros, any Pixar, any Marx Bros., any James Cameron films, or any of the thousands of other movies I enjoy. From now on, only me and my shitty taste are allowed those. You can keep Carrot Top's CHAIRMAN OF THE BOARD and anything starring Jim Varney. I hope you're very happy together.
June 4, 2004, 8:52 p.m. CST
...how do you think this flick will play for someone who was really not fond of the first film and can't stand Diesel's tough guy act? Like Wesley Snipes, Diesel always seems to be ACTING tough instead of BEING tough. Lee Marvin was tough. Charles Bronson was tough. Lee Van Cleef was tough. Warren Oates was tough. Joe Don Baker was tough. Vin Diesel has a gym membership.
June 4, 2004, 9:07 p.m. CST
by drew mcweeny
Ha... good question. If Diesel doesn't work for you on any level, then I'm not sure how much you'll like it. For me, it all depends on how he's written, and I think Twohy is pretty great with that sort of thing. There's a scene in the film where he threatens to kill a guy with a teacup. And does he? Well... let's just say that the sardine key he holds up next becomes threatening by default.
June 4, 2004, 9:25 p.m. CST
...I'll catch it at the dollar theater in a few months. Thanks again!
June 4, 2004, 10:10 p.m. CST
Earnest goes to camp is a classic Mori, and don't u deny it. BTW Varney was in Toy Story 1 and 2 so haha. Anyway I hope this movie is good, PB wasn't as good as I hoped, weird lighting and Aussie accents (i'm aussie) put me off in the begining, but it got better as it kept going.
June 4, 2004, 11:16 p.m. CST
- Gotta admit you sold me. The preview looked
June 4, 2004, 11:18 p.m. CST
I love it
June 4, 2004, 11:18 p.m. CST
But I saw the re-release ANTI-David Lynch cut of Dune the other day and it STUNK!.. Not that the original was Sci-Fi gold either but.. Jesus.. they even changed the directors name from David Lynch to some other hack, and that fucking backstory at the start... what a wank.. but anyway.. The Riddick movie, I'll wait for DVD.. Nothing personal against the movie, no politics or agenda, the trailer didn't appeal to me much. Besides that's only 22 bucks they'll be missing from their 100 Milion+ potential box office takings so, I hope it all goes well for them. *BAMF*
June 5, 2004, 3:14 a.m. CST
I'm now more than ever totally stoked on seeing this. However, you mentioned that the Toombs character isn't directly killed off, where in the novelization he gets straight-up offed. I wonder if this is a result of that cutting that was supposedly done to the film. Most of the early reviews I've read had a lot of people responding well to the Toombs character. I'm anxious to see what kind of charisma the actor playing him brings to the table.
June 5, 2004, 4:09 a.m. CST
Riddick looks like a bag of ass with a leaky bottom. The first movie was fucking terrible and there is no point to waste money on this since it's just a more expensive terrible. Riddick lick nuts
June 5, 2004, 5:55 a.m. CST
I'm now officially enthusiastic about seeing this film. Sounds very good.
June 5, 2004, 8:26 a.m. CST
After the zombie one is done that is. :) Vin Diesel and Keith David are both underrated. Pitch Black was a breath of fresh air. Hopefully Chronicles will be similar, but with a larger budget.
June 5, 2004, 10:26 a.m. CST
by The Founder
Vin is appealing in very few things, and Pitch Black was one of them. Don't get me wrong, I have no beef or problem with Vin, but it's his poor choice in his last films that has soured me to the guy. Here'e a guy who had potential to become this generation's action hero, and a person of color to boot, instead of all the lily white action guys who always save the day in a world where people of color obviously can't. Well that a whole different topic that we can thibnk Hollywood for. Now back to Vin. His choices as I said have been poor, his films mediocre to terriable. I don't know of Vin is to blame or his agnet, but he's on the fast track to the straight to video bin. Will Riddick boost him up? No, I could be wrong, but even if this film range from good entertainment to great movie, and was worth the big budget, it still won't perform well. I give this movie 70 million tops for domestic gross, and I'm being kind. Sorry Vin, you waited to long, people have little interest in you know.
June 5, 2004, 11:17 a.m. CST
by TheGinger Twit
I have a feeling I'll feel just as stupid watching this as I felt watching Pitch black.
June 5, 2004, 11:20 a.m. CST
by TheGinger Twit
June 5, 2004, 11:52 a.m. CST
by Turd Furgeson
Just hurry up with the Spidey 2 review already.
June 5, 2004, 12:04 p.m. CST
by Jack Burton
1. Leave the scatological metaphors to Harry in the future. That opening paragraph was just nasty. 2. Leaving a 7 year old home alone for 6 hours would get you arrested for child endangerment. 3. Don't tease us about Spider Man 2. If you are going to drop hints that you saw it, just say if it's either worth it or not. I have some big reservations about that one more then any other film this summer (most of the rest look terrible) and so does everyone else I know. With that out of the way, why is this Pg-13 and the video game rated M? Within the opening of the game Johns and Riddick are both saying "fuck" and the violence is heavy. (It's also a freaking great game so anyone with an X-Box should check it out.)
June 5, 2004, 1:24 p.m. CST
by drew mcweeny
You want an answer? Sure. Yes, I wrote two drafts of MORTAL KOMBAT 3. How that means I'm not allowed to have a negative opinion of the work of Paul "B.S." Anderson escapes me. I'm not riding anyone's coattails. He had nothing to do with me getting that job. Like every open assignment in Hollywood, that one was a competitive process, and both my partner and I saw enormous merit in writing a franchise picture that is a SF/kung-fu film. Why? Cause I love SF and kung-fu films. It's really just that simple. I imagine it's the same reason Anderson took the job on the first film. If they ever work all their legal nonsense out and actually make the picture, you can decide then if the work we did is better or worse than the work he did. And even if you hate the work we did, that still isn't going to change my opinion of Anderson. As far as all the AvsP stuff you ran, you're barking up the wrong tree. I didn't write those articles, and I didn't publish those articles. And if you're really obssessive about Harry's opinion of AvsP, you'll notice that lately, he's actually become optimistic about it based on the newest footage that's come out. He almost seems eager to see it at this point. Once again, this "scandal" isn't.
June 5, 2004, 2:43 p.m. CST
by The Founder
Why would a person of color be only black? I said Vin is a man of color, I never said black nunmb nuts.
June 5, 2004, 3:13 p.m. CST
Pitch Black had some good atmosphere, some good moments. The solution they found to hide from the bat things was a little too convenient for my taste though. It is one of the best opening scenes in sci fi. I have reservations about any movie where there are "Necromongers" in them. The name is just too 7-11 video game cool. I can almost smell the slurpees and slim jims. Must have been on Meth when the wrote that name down. I hope I'll be pleasantly suprised, and that I'll have to eat my words.
June 5, 2004, 3:19 p.m. CST
Hey. Lay Off The "Placing Caps on Every Word' Schtick. It's Distracting. Ouch...Just a Suggestion.
June 5, 2004, 6:18 p.m. CST
It's about time you came around and stood up for yourself. When these little peckerheads come around and start bashing you (and just giving in to jealousy) its good to see the writer responding with a valid rebuttal. Now that I have your attention...can you PLEASE remove the ads for that god-damn napoleon dude??? "friggin sweet" my ass.
June 5, 2004, 10:16 p.m. CST
Obsess much? Good review Mori! I'll be checking this one out!
June 5, 2004, 10:49 p.m. CST
by ima biggun
Hollywood connected sumbitch has seen Spidey! Damn him! Damn him to heck!
June 6, 2004, 4:16 a.m. CST
I hope Riddick is a good movie , but its box-office future doesnt look too bright in my eyes. Vin Diesel can still have a good career with slightly better film choices. I thought A Man Apart was a very underated film. Oh, and I would suggest getting to a theater early on June 30th. It is the best movie Ive seen since ROTK. Maybe a review later. Peace.
June 6, 2004, 7:44 a.m. CST
by Blok Narpin
"The sad thing is, most sequels shit the bed" ----- BS. The idea that most sequels suck is complete bullshit. There are good sequels and bad sequels. For every Batman and Robin there is an X-Men United. For every Matrix Reloaded/Revolutions there is a Back to the Future II/III. For every Godfather III there is a Terminator 3. Sequels are like any other movie. They might be good or they might be bad, It depends on story, script, acting and direction. To say most suck is bullshit.
June 6, 2004, 9:14 a.m. CST
While you didn't get too specific on certain things you still gave a hell of a lot away that I'd rather not have known. I hope this rocks, I really do, but I definitely have my doubts.
June 6, 2004, 10:57 a.m. CST
At this site, it seems like people are so cynical, and very willing to point out how naive someone who has anything realistic or, heaven forbid, positive, to say is. The movie looks like fun. Stop banging on your highchairs being morbidly fixated on how much money the movie makes, if your ego can withstand it. See the movie for yourself. Riddick's milieu is being expanded, so yeah, it's on a grander scale than it's predecessor. That's called growth. If the scenario seems to grandiose, you've obviously forgotten that one of the pricipal tenets of these scifi flicks is suspension of disbelief.
June 6, 2004, 1:17 p.m. CST
Just the fact that it's not called "Pitch Black II" speaks volumes. I was a little worried about them falling into the 'Dune'-trap by having too many charaters and ideas, but it sounds like this guy avoided that. Sure seems like Pitch Black really was the new Terminator. At first glance--small films/directors/actors but big potential brewing beneath the surface. I'll definately be seeing this one.
June 6, 2004, 1:21 p.m. CST
ny-kid...I...just...fucking... HAD to do it!
June 6, 2004, 3:02 p.m. CST
i guess it was jake gyllenhaal who made THE DAY AFTER TOMORROW worth watching for me. well the father son story part was rather emberassing because of it`s lack of reason and profoundness. BUT THE DAY AFTER TOMORROW was IMO much more entertaining and a bit less ridiculous than TROY. TROY was pure crap except some cool fight scenes, sean bean and brad pitt`s freaking body!!!! TDAT offered a certain amount of suspense... and to the other blockbuster: HARRY POTTER.... HE rules I T A L L. just the way cuaron uses weather and seasons to create suspense is really stimulating. . . . i
June 6, 2004, 3:14 p.m. CST
Thank God for David Twohy. I can't wait for the ass-kicking to begin.
June 6, 2004, 3:35 p.m. CST
Interesting, VERY VERY VERY interesting. No review of 'Shrek 2', by ANYONE. Very odd. Clearly, at some point, big ol' Harry's been dissed in some way by Dreamworks, and he's *** IN HIS BIG LITTLE BOY SNIT WAY *** taking it out on them by refusing any review of Shrek 2 on this site. "I'm takin my ball and goin home", the little boy sneers, and stomps off, dust streaked tears on his precious little snot-nosed spoiled-brat face. Have a good summer! (When does this post get deleted?)
June 6, 2004, 4:58 p.m. CST
'Cuz if it's the truth, all venomous jokes aside, we deserve to know.
June 6, 2004, 5:46 p.m. CST
Shrek and Garfield will both have a big share of the kiddie market next weekend. Harry Potter wins the older kiddies with more money. But I'm not sure who's going to see the Stepford Wives...maybe women and the older crowd. It just doesn't look like a very fun movie, the sort of thing that does well during the summer. Riddick will do well next weekend, definitely in the top three. And if it's as reasonable as Moriarty claims, then it will have a good second and third weekend.
June 6, 2004, 5:58 p.m. CST
by drew mcweeny
... not to puncture your balloon of delusion, but did you happen to see my review for SHREK 2 at http://linux10985.dn.net/display.cgi?id=17582 or Quint's review for it at http://linux10985.dn.net/display.cgi?id=17565 or any of the half-dozen other reviews that were run for it on the site in the weeks leading up to release? I haven't reviewed TROY yet, but that's because I haven't seen it because I just didn't really care. Is that a conspiracy, too?
June 6, 2004, 6:38 p.m. CST
It will suck
June 6, 2004, 7:14 p.m. CST
by Grammaton Cleric
quit dickin' around with these fuckers and give us the lowdown on Spidey 2...or just a hint...please...
June 6, 2004, 8:19 p.m. CST
by Man w No Name
COR will be a bad ass movie, and as much as you nerds and fanboys like to think...just because you hate Vin Diesel doesn't mean everyone else hates Vin Diesel. Except for XXX I've enjoyed all his movies. And all you guys can do is talk shit about it's box office draw...LOL, so what, if it's a good movie, it's a good movie, who cares how much money it makes. Oh, and btw, for the moron that said Stepford Wives was going to out perform COR, what rock have you been living in the last month?? Stepford Wives at most will make 10 million dollars opening weekend. It's a bad remake, there hasnt been any buzz about the movie, and it's hardly advertised at all. How someone thinks that it'll get a big piece of the box office is beyond me......Pitch Black>>>spiderman, and I'm sure COR>>>>>spiderman 2.
June 7, 2004, 1:10 a.m. CST
Pitch Black was a sweet movies and im sick of hearing all off you goobers rip on good movies. p.s. Hey Greg- I didn't do it
June 7, 2004, 1:17 a.m. CST
fuck garfield and shrek 2. only little kids and homos will like those movies(except Puss in Boots.And fuck the stepford wives too. what was the last blockbuster that fag Matthew Broderick had anyway, Lion King?
June 7, 2004, 3:15 a.m. CST
I dug "Pitch Black" for what it was, but I can already tell I'm not gonna like the sequel. If the first ten minutes are indicative of the quality, this looks to be a bust. Of course I've never been enamored with they way Twohy uses the camera (or pen for that matter). I chalked up his stilted action staging to low budget in his previous efforts, but he really has no excuse with Tentpole Money. It's too soon for me to dub it "Chronicles of Shiddick," but it don't look good.
June 8, 2004, 10:24 a.m. CST
by KOLOBOS REXX
...And was very plesantly impressed with it! It's nice to see that after LOTR, someone isn't afraid to approach the big epic fantasy/sci-fi saga. The production design and costuming are amazing, the effects (minor issue with the hellhounds) are really nice, and the acting is a lot better than you'd expect. Sure, Diesel's delivery is a tad... dry, but we aren't going for a Shakespearean quality here. I'm just happy to see some imagination and actual interest in telling a good story. You can debate what concepts this movie "rips off", but in the genre of sci-fi/fantasy, total originality is almost impossible anyway. And you don't have to be brain-dead to appreciate the film, either, which is nice, especially in this day and age... I hope we get to see part 2 and 3, there's a lot of cool directions to go in with this story. I'd also like to mention that it really reminds me of the sci-fi novels I grew up reading as a kid: evil weird empires, crusading heroes, ect. When was the last time aside from "Dune" anyone even really tried this kind of stuff, anyway?
June 8, 2004, 12:47 p.m. CST
i rewatched pitch black the other day in preparation for riddick, and something occurred to me, a nagging, minor thing. these are clarly humans, from earth (there are muslims, and the british-accented dude said he was supposed to die in france), and therefore the technology they possess would logically be some advanced form of what we have. currently, solar cells can store energy, and run even after the sun is down. future solar cells could probably store way more energy. i know, i know, the sun was always up so they didn't have to worry about that, but if the crash survivors' guess was correct, and the settlement they found was a geological advance team or something, they probably would have brough existing solar technology with them (which would store the energy), not build new stuff just for that planet. and if they researched the planet at all before they sent an advance team there, thay would know about the darkness anyhow(and maybe the creatures too!). well, in any case, i'm sure riddick will be sweet.
June 8, 2004, 2:49 p.m. CST
Just wanted to say that. :)
June 8, 2004, 4:41 p.m. CST
"For every Batman and Robin there is an X-Men United. For every Matrix Reloaded/Revolutions there is a Back to the Future II/III. For every Godfather III there is a Terminator 3." The other examples are good but dude are you trying to say that you honestly enjoyed BTTF II and III? Those movies sucked major ass! When I saw BTTF II in the theatre the whole crowd was falling asleep! As for Matrix Reloaded/ Revolutions, though they weren't perfect they still rocked ass IMO! Much better than that sorry BTTF trilogy which just flat out sucked hard.
June 8, 2004, 10:57 p.m. CST
Sure, it borrowed Asimov's multiple-sun-eclipse idea from "Nightfall," but used it for a completely different effect: as a vehicle to shift the movie from science fiction to monster mode. And this would be a bad move if the movie turned into a strictly monster flick, but the monsters/aliens are really just another vehicle to showcase what the movie is REALLY about: what humans will do when they are thrown into a life or death struggle for survival--a story that has been with us as long as we've been struggling to survive, a truly mythic story. Faced with death, will humans lose their humanity to save their own skin? Or will they trascend mere physical survival to risk it all for the sake of others? This is a common element in hero stories throughout history; it is not simply physical triumph (beating up the bad guy, killing the monster, blowing up the Death Star), but rather it is the point at which the hero risks himself to save others, THAT is when he becomes a hero. That has been the point of the hero myth throughout history, the development of empathy and self-sacrifice. And that is what this story is about, Riddick rejoining the human race and becoming more than just a badass. That is what elevates Pitch Black above mere science fiction or horror or adventure or any other genre that it managages to blend so well in one slick package. Pitch Black is mythic. And The Chronicles of Riddick looks like it will expand upon everything that makes Pitch Black great.
June 9, 2004, 8:42 p.m. CST
Hey, Does anyone know the song playing in the background of the commercials (especially the radio ad) is??? It sounds awesome! Also anyone know if theres gonna be a sountrack to this movie?? -Nick
June 9, 2004, 9:32 p.m. CST
Yeah, "Riddick" uses Elfman's main theme from the "Planet of the Apes" remake. Kinda fitting that they'd use music from another mediocre sci-fi movie, huh?
June 9, 2004, 9:39 p.m. CST
I caught a screening of this movie last night in Detroit and I have to say that Quint's review is pretty spot-on. It's very, very underwhelming. I'd forgive cheezy special effects and space opera terms like "Necromongers" if the film had decent action sequences and characterization. But it doesn't. The only thing Quint failed to point out is that the action sequences are horribly directed and edited. Chronicles of Riddick uses the sloppy and choppy style that Hollywood seems to favor as of late, where every move is rendered undecipherable by poor angles and jumpy editing. I honestly don't know what Moriarty saw in this film. Yeah, it tries to create a new sci-fi universe but...that only gets you so far. This is a text book case of DVD rental...check it out for $3.50 when it hits Blockbuster. That's my whole hearted advice.
June 10, 2004, 3:25 a.m. CST
I enjoyed Pitch Black. It was different and held my interest. So did Riddick. Most women find Riddick shivery sexy, even my sixty year old mom.