Ain't It Cool News (


I am – Hercules!!

The WB announced its fall slate Tuesday afternoon!

What are we excited about?

Though early reports made no mention of “Global Frequency,” the WB has ordered the much-anticipated hourlong for midseason.

There is no sign of “Dark Shadows,” the vampire soap the WB had hoped to fill the vacuum left by critical and fan favorite “Angel.”

Shitcom “The Help” has been shitcanned, apparently because all networks realized about seven seconds ago that Americans now prefer reality shows to anything with a laughtrack.

The big rundown:

8:00 7th Heaven
9:00 Everwood

8:00 Gilmore Girls
9:00 One Tree Hill

8:00 Smallville
9:00 Blue Collar TV
9:30 Green Screen

8:00 The Mountain
9:00 Studio 7

8:00 What I Like About You
8:30 Commando Nanny
9:00 Reba
9:30 Grounded For Life

7:00 Steve Harvey’s Big Time
8:00 Charmed
9:00 Jack & Bobby

The six new WB series due this autumn:

“Blue Collar TV” is a “Hee-Haw”-like sketch comedy show from Fax Bahr & Adam Small (“Mad TV,” “The Jamie Kennedy Experiment”) starring Jeff Foxworthy (“The Jeff Foxworthy Show”), Bill Engvall (“Delta,” “The Jeff Foxworthy Show”), Larry the Cable Guy (“The Blue Collar Comedy Tour: The Movie”) and Heath Hyche (“Man on the Moon”).

“Commando Nanny” is a sitcom, based on a chapter in the life of “Survivor” producer Mark Burnett, about a young British ex-commando who becomes a nanny in Beverly Hills. It’s produced by Burnett and writer-producer David Flebotte (“The Sopranos,” “The Bernie Mac Show”) and stars Philip Winchester (“The Patriot,” “Thunderbirds”), Gerald McRaney (“Mister Sterling”), Kristin Bauer (“Hidden Hills,” “50 First Dates”) and Ricky Mabe (“Isn’t She Great”).

“Green Screen”, from Drew Carey (“The Drew Carey Show”), will see “Whose Line Is It Anyway” vets Carey, Ryan Stiles, Colin Mochrie and Greg Proops improvise against animated backgrounds.

“Jack & Bobby” is a contemporary drama about a single mom raising two teens, one of whom is destined to become this nation’s president. It’s from writer-producers Gerg Berlanti (“Everwood”) and Vanessa Taylor (“Gideon’s Crossing,” “Alias,” “Everwood”). It stars Matthew Long, Logan Lerman (“Riding In Cars With Boys”), Christine Lahti (“Chicago Hope”), Jessica Pare (“Lost and Delirious”), John Slattery (“Ed,” “K Street”) and Edwin Hodge (“The Alamo”).

“The Mountain” is a drama from “O.C.” writer-producer Stephanie Savage about a 25-year-old who inherits a ski resort. It stars Oliver Hudson (“MY Guide to Becoming a Rock Star”), Elizabeth Bogush (“Titans”), Penn Badgley (“Do Over”), Anson Mount (“Line of Fire”), Barbara Hershey (“Chicago Hope”), Mitch Pileggi (“Tarzan”), Chad Everett (“Mulholland Dr.”), Alana de la Garza (“All My Children”) and Johann Urb (“Zoolander”).

“Studio 7” is from Michael Davies (“Who Wants To Be A Millionaire,” “Wife Swap”). It “mixes the reality and game show genres to produce a radically new quiz show seen from the contestants' point of view.” Of course it does!


“Global Frequency” is an action-adventure hourlong that deals, as readers of Warren Ellis’ brilliant (and, if I’m not mistaken, ongoing) graphic novel can attest, with an elite and illegal network of 1,001 intelligence operatives charged with quashing dire and fast-emerging crises as they arrive all over the planet. It’s being overseen by screenwriter John Rogers (“American Outlaws,” “The Core,” the upcoming “Catwoman”).

“Rocky Point” is about a 19-year-old New Englander who decides to defer her freshman year at Princeton to live on Hawaii’s North Show with a group of friends. It from the screenwriting team of Lizzy Weiss & John Stockwell, who also wrote the 2002 surf-girl feature “Blue Crush.” The only one cast so far is Billy Campbell (“Once and Again”), who plays the girl’s father.

“Shacking Up” is a sitcom about a 25-year-old med school dropout who returns home to discover his hot mom is sleeping with someone younger than he is. It’s from screenwriters David Garrett & Jason Ward (“Corky Romano”), writer-producers Jamie Kennedy and John Etting (“The Jamie Kennedy Experiment”) and writer-producer Michael Landworthy (“Zoe, Duncan, Jack and Jane,” “8 Simple Rules …”). It stars Fran Drescher (“Good Morning, Miami”), Ben Feldman (star of a failed pilot titled “The Mayor”), Ryan McPartlin (“Passions”), Branden Williams (“Crossroads”) and Misti Traya (Iris on “Joan of Arcadia”).

I am – Hercules!!

Readers Talkback
comments powered by Disqus
    + Expand All
  • May 18, 2004, 2:44 a.m. CST

    Why is Reba still on the air?

    by krims0nknite

    I swear to god, the WB has the shittiest "comedies" of them all. And they seem to keep them around forever.

  • May 18, 2004, 2:46 a.m. CST

    Action packed?

    by John Winger

    What a steamin' log o' crap....Smallville is ok, but COME ON.. this lineup wouldn't get ratings back in the days of 5 channels. I align myself with the people who are flabbergasted Charmed is still on while they felt there was no reason to keep Angel on the air...Don't get me wrong, McGowan and Milano = ratings, but just have a show where they wrestle or something, not magical theme shows every's pathetic. I may pull this channel out of the Tivo rotation altogether...

  • May 18, 2004, 2:50 a.m. CST

    Illyria's Accident

    by Luvs269er

    The WB assholes picked this SHIT over ANGEL?!?!?!? Listen up good, WB. You've lost me completely. I'm skipping your channel on my TV's and my cable boxes. No more Smallville for me-- or anything else that smells like FROG SHIT!!

  • May 18, 2004, 3:19 a.m. CST


    by Luvs269er

    I'll say it again-- You WB nimrods wouldn't know how to run a Television Network if somebody put a bazooka to your heads! CHARMED is still on the air? Milano was cool & cute two husbands, five tattoos and two implant replacement sets ago. If Rose McGowan wasn't on-- only Pervs with no internet connection would still be watching that lame ass show. Keep your Steve Harvey, your Kennedy Xperiments, et al. In some alternate universe the PAX network is kicking your froggy asses with Billy Ray Cyrus dramas and marathon Dr. Quinn repeats. I just wish for one second that Les Moonves and his Viacom cronies would throw the UPN a bone and pay for some quality material-- or better yet, pick up every decent drama (SF, Fantasy or not) and comedy that the WB and FOX have cancelled in the last 3 years so the UPN could for once and for all obliterate the WB's soggy lineup (or at the very least get Gerald Levin and his programming cast of morons sacked)!

  • May 18, 2004, 4:16 a.m. CST

    Dark Shadows Dead?

    by Daveydje

    Hope so. Bring back Angel!! ;o)

  • May 18, 2004, 6:59 a.m. CST

    Jack & Bobby

    by Playhouse

    And the Kennedys haven't sued yet? Why does this sound like utter crap? The WB should just fold.

  • And it's EXACTLY what you deserve. "Oh, the pain...."

  • May 18, 2004, 7:29 a.m. CST

    'What's the frequency, Kenneth?'

    by CKnightShift

    Just always wanted to use that in a Talkback.

  • May 18, 2004, 8:11 a.m. CST

    Mitch "Tarzan" Pileggi?

    by NNNOOO!!!

    I guess you really are only as good as your last show...

  • May 18, 2004, 11:21 a.m. CST

    Commando Nanny?????

    by jim

    I don't care how good this show might be. With that title no one will take it seriously, even if it is a comedy (it is a comedy, right?). The title evoked the supressed memory of Hulk Hogan's "Mr. Nanny". As for Dark Shadows, maybe the WB thought they could replace Angel with another vampire show and the fans would blindly tune in. But after receiving the feedback they discover that fans are a bit more fickle. "Holy Crap!", the WB executives have just realised, "It turns out fans of Angel like the show itself and are not just sheep to the genre. Who would have thunk?". And so they shelve Dark Shadows because they no longer believe they will get the built-in audience (Angel fans) they were counting on. At least that's my theory.

  • May 18, 2004, 11:29 a.m. CST

    On the contrary, Herc...

    by Kent Allard

    I'd rather watch a sitcom then yet ANOTHER reality show or clone-like police procedural. The networks just don't make any funny sitcoms anymore.

  • May 18, 2004, noon CST

    welp i'm at least glad that dark shadows didn't make it, but

    by Demosthenes2

    it still peeves me that crap like one tree hill survives, i guess the other wb shows are really cheap and therefore more cost-effective, they sure look it. gilmore girls is the only thing good left on that network and i wouldn't be surprised at this rate if it's the last thing it ever contributes of any value to television history. maybe wb realized that to give us another vampire show as a way to retain its place in fandom is really just a slap in the face to us.

  • May 18, 2004, 2:12 p.m. CST

    Egad! I wouldn

    by Judge Doom

    What a bunch of CRAP! Commando Nanny?! What a f### is that?

  • May 18, 2004, 3:02 p.m. CST

    Grounded For Life

    by orlandocfa

    I agree that most of the line up is crap, but Grounded for Life is a great show. I've been watching it since it was on Fox. It's too bad they didn't pick up wonderfalls.

  • May 18, 2004, 3:25 p.m. CST

    What the hell is wrong with the WB???

    by KCMOSHer

    Untrained chimps with poor problem solving skills could do better at running a network. What complete idiot says 'Man, we need to get rid of that Angel show and get a sitcom about a nanny who used to be a commando! Hey, I have a title too...COMMANDO NANNY! Yeah! That'll definitely grab audiences in a way that a fan favorite like Angel never could!' What total and complete fucktards. Well, if nothing else, at least this means I'll never have a reason to watch the WB again, ever.

  • May 18, 2004, 3:43 p.m. CST

    This schedule looks horrible

    by cooper2000

    A monkey could have made better choices. Angel was cancelled for this shit? I was looking forward to Lost in Space and Dark Shadows too. Hope we can see them after most of this lineup tanks.

  • May 18, 2004, 4:18 p.m. CST

    No Ron White? Forget you Blue Collar

    by 007-11

    He was the only bright spot on the comedy tour

  • May 18, 2004, 4:22 p.m. CST


    by sTalking_Goat

    I wasn't exactly looking forward to Dark Shadows but with the current state of TV I was willing to check it out atleast once. And then they drop it. I'm fucking reeling. Alias was the only show on network TV I was actually going to watch this Fall and now...not a damn thing. Good God. Thank God for FX, HBO and broadband internet. Fuck Charmed. There's a show that NEEDS to die.

  • May 18, 2004, 4:41 p.m. CST

    Global Frequency still a possiblity

    by Total Geekazoid

    I read somewhere that the Global Frequency pilot won't even be completed until July (because of the tons of CGI required.) So it'll be a mid-season consideration. Heard the script is good. Cross your fingers.

  • May 18, 2004, 5:15 p.m. CST

    wb=wipes balls

    by SG7

    Damn, a yawner lineup if there ever was one.

  • May 18, 2004, 6:43 p.m. CST

    Wait! Fran Dresher is the hot MOM? ROFL!

    by sTalking_Goat

    I couldn't fuck anyon whose voice sounds like 1000 baby birds being fed into a woodchipper.

  • May 18, 2004, 9:43 p.m. CST

    Jesus F'in Christ!!!!!

    by thound

    They take James Marsters and Angel off the %#^#(@ air, and give us Jeff Foxworthy and the "Hee-Haw" for new milennium? What steaming pile of idiot turd is programming this POS network?

  • May 19, 2004, 2:41 a.m. CST

    The Comics "Global Frequency"

    by DarkCowBoy

    You said "(and, if I

  • May 19, 2004, 2:43 a.m. CST

    Global Frequency is great...but...

    by skitch

    Why can't HBO or Showtime pick this sort of thing up (as well as the superior comic "Preacher") for a TV series instead of the lame ass WB and other equally pandering to the dumbing down of America networks?...Preacher will be a movie but the very premise lends itself to a finite ongoing series like the Prisoner...who the hell is running Hollywood these days?...oh wait, no talent morons...sorry, forgot myself...big business always wins out...thought I was in Utopia for a sec instead of the real world (hey, now there's an idea)

  • May 19, 2004, 2:54 a.m. CST

    The WB Slices Own Throat! Film At 11!

    by Real Deal

    Nothing to see on this network. Global Frequency might be a good show but why is it a mid season show? The fact of the matter is the WB execs are totally clueless as to what people want to watch. When their ratings really sink they'll be standing there scratching their collective heads wondering " why "? That's if they aren't fired and standing in the bread line. Way to go WB! Are you listening even? Oh well, it's your money.

  • May 19, 2004, 4:14 a.m. CST

    They scrap Angel...

    by Daveydje

    ...for this shit! Unbefuckinglevable.

  • May 19, 2004, 8:54 a.m. CST

    One Tree Hill

    by JackBristow

    I can't complain about this. My wife (yes, some of the people here actually do find women) watches it all the time. Kind weird how the basketball season stretches from September to May.

  • May 19, 2004, 8:55 a.m. CST

    All Hail the WB

    by JackBristow

    Man, I can't wait for COMMANDO NANNY. Although what's this "based on the life on Mark Burnett" bullshit? But commandos? Nannys? Man, that's like vampires and werewolves right there. Sweet man! And reba, glad that's back. Charmed is one of the best shows on television, isn't it? Such wonderful storytelling. Oh, and this is all sarcasm. The WB sucks nuts.