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UPDATED! Malkovich is NOT Voldemort! Plus a gushing review of Azkaban!!!

The crusty seaman here with the real deal. Turns out BBC has gotten WB to comment (check here for the story!)and they've denied the rumor that John Malkovich is playing Voldemort. It honestly doesn't surprise me as IMDB ran with the whole "Mr. Bean" as Voldemort thing a while back. So, looks like I can still cross my fingers that Tim Roth or perhaps Jeremy Irons will step into Voldemort's evil booties!

Ahoy, squirts. Quint here with a couple of nice tidbits on the next two Harry Potter films. I've been a fan of these books since I was forced into them before a scheduled interview with screenwriter Steven Kloves when the first film was still shooting. Prisoner of Azkaban is arguably the best book in the series and I'm really excited to see that the early word is Alfonso Cuaron hit Azkaban out of the ball park.

Before we get to Red Whale's... enthusiastic review, I'd like to bring up the casting that I saw over at IMDB earlier today. According to IMDB's news section John Malkovich has been cast as Lord Voldemort in the currently filming HARRY POTTER AND THE GOBLET OF FIRE. I love this casting, even though I'll have to force Tim Roth's face off of Voldemort when I reread the books. What do you folks think?

Anyway, here's Red Whale with his rather odd look at a rough cut of PRISONER OF AZKABAN:

Red Whale here. First time sender, long time reader. Just caught a screening of Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban ( can we please have a title that's not so damn hard to spell?) I've never read the books, you know, because....well, because they're long as shit. But I've kinda liked the movies, was def. more excited about this one, though, cuz it's got a director who's cool, and isn't in love with Robin Williams.

Well, anyone, I dont' have kids so I took my nephew, who's 14, so I don't know if he's in the target age or not, but he loves HP.

Anyways, the movie starts off with Harry making his fat aunt even fatter, thus pissing off the Dursleys. So anyway, Harry's in trouble, and looks like he won't be able to go to Hogwarts, of course we know that's not the case, other wise this movie would be pretty lame. The beginning is pretty silly, but luckily it's also short and only gets better.

Luckily for Harry he gets picked up by this big purple bus (the Night Bus). So off to Hogwarts we go.

It's about this point that we leant that a prisoner has escaped from Azkaban, the magical prison. All of Hogwarts is abuzz. Especially Harry, Ron, and Hermione whp suspect that Sirius Black (aformentioned prisoner) is going to try to kill Harry.

Enough of the plot, which is actually a lot more adult than the previous movies., but we got better stuff to talk about. First off all, these kids have improved ten fold. Especially the kid who plays Hermione. And believe me, she'll be smokin' at 18. These kids actually make you believe they've been through these past few years. Harry is especially war-torn, feeling the weight of all this. There's a scene where Harry must protect Hermione that is actually touching.

The rest of the cast is pretty much the same as before, though Snape gets some much more deserved screen time, and the new Dumbledore is alright. He def. aint Richard Harris, but he does the job.

As for Cuaron, he makes the film. This film is an outright thriller. The movie starts out light but slowly the creepiness factor begins to, uh, creep in. And for the first time, we actually sense that we are in a magical world. He keeps his close-ups to a minimum and lets us just feast on the wonderful eye candy. It's all so freaking beautiful!

And terrifying. This is a kids movie? I mean, the stars are kids, but it's all pretty unsettling, especially these Dementors. They seem to be like Kryptonite to our young wizard Harry. It's kind of freaky to see these things roaming around what's supposed to be a school. Also, there's the required Quidditch match, which takes place in rain and is interrupted by the friendly dementors.

The end is pretty brilliant, even for me who hates time travel. And it's not the cop out that I felt the previous two films gave us. All in all, it's a cool movie I'd say right up there with LOTR. And Im sure HP lovers would probably argue its even better than that. Out.




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Reader Talkback

moo
by Fernwick_
May 1st, 2004
12:36:06 AM
AcTiVaTe!
by WonderTwins
May 1st, 2004
12:45:22 AM
LOTR was better
by waq2009
May 1st, 2004
12:45:44 AM
His voice would be excellent
by 007-11
May 1st, 2004
12:46:09 AM
They're not really effing around with these casting choices, are
by Terry_1978
May 1st, 2004
12:52:58 AM
I'd pay money to see one of the ads for this say "That shit was
by 007-11
May 1st, 2004
12:57:21 AM
Plant
by AlwaysThere
May 1st, 2004
01:07:08 AM
He's not Voldemort...
by Toons
May 1st, 2004
01:19:05 AM
HMMM
by Holly Golightly
May 1st, 2004
01:23:54 AM
Scratch that!
by Holly Golightly
May 1st, 2004
01:25:49 AM
I've been thinking...
by Belvis
May 1st, 2004
01:37:13 AM
Duh -- disproven!!!!!
by Sweeper887
May 1st, 2004
01:52:04 AM
total BS review
by elrechazao
May 1st, 2004
02:41:05 AM
smoking age here is actually 16
by scrumdiddly
May 1st, 2004
03:39:27 AM
oh and yeah, plant..
by scrumdiddly
May 1st, 2004
03:41:57 AM
The best choice for Voldemort in my opinion
by Greasycreasy
May 1st, 2004
03:58:01 AM
Definitely no Richard Harris
by Sepulchrave
May 1st, 2004
05:01:04 AM
It's the Knight Bus, not the Night Bus(n/t)
by Wungolioth
May 1st, 2004
07:28:15 AM
Tim Roth
by februari
May 1st, 2004
08:00:28 AM
"And believe me, she'll be smokin' at 18"
by the G-man
May 1st, 2004
08:34:53 AM
READING IS HARD!
by Teko
May 1st, 2004
08:35:54 AM
Jeremy Irons
by MrMxyzptlk123
May 1st, 2004
08:47:00 AM
A Serious Black? Really?
by TisketMaster
May 1st, 2004
09:29:59 AM
Voldemort & Hermione
by Itchy
May 1st, 2004
09:51:06 AM
John Malkovich will play Hans Frank quite soon...
by SalvatoreGravano
May 1st, 2004
10:34:21 AM
"Arguably the best book in the series"?
by Somebodyelse
May 1st, 2004
11:49:32 AM
Alan Rickman
by MC Lovecraft
May 1st, 2004
11:51:10 AM
John Malkovich has been cast as a new, Douglas Adams-created cha
by Declan_Swartz
May 1st, 2004
12:10:20 PM
JEREMY IRONS? WTF?
by Aeglos Istarion
May 1st, 2004
12:44:45 PM
Jonathan Crane for Voldemort!
by Revolutions
May 1st, 2004
12:52:17 PM
He turned down the Green Goblin because he has a snobbishness ab
by Sith Witch
May 1st, 2004
01:01:56 PM
Maybe AICN should have some sort of policy for only printing rev
by Avon
May 1st, 2004
01:20:37 PM
This will sink! LOTR beaten the crap out of Harry Potter on all
by Robofag
May 1st, 2004
01:23:48 PM
Serious black actors....
by spectrebeeyatch
May 1st, 2004
02:21:27 PM
John Saxon IS Voldemort
by ScreamingPenis
May 1st, 2004
02:26:08 PM
seek help, people
by greyspecter
May 1st, 2004
02:46:04 PM
and one other thing...
by greyspecter
May 1st, 2004
02:53:05 PM
John Malkovich is not You Know Who, but...
by JackBristow
May 1st, 2004
03:04:18 PM
Throwing in my tuppence
by BrashHulk
May 1st, 2004
06:22:47 PM
And a little more....
by BrashHulk
May 1st, 2004
06:23:30 PM
LOTR vs. HP
by ginny_hpfan
May 1st, 2004
06:23:44 PM
And finally....
by BrashHulk
May 1st, 2004
06:25:26 PM
This TB order is fuckin' wack
by TheDevilsBidness
May 1st, 2004
06:32:05 PM
'His Dark Materials'...
by workshed
May 1st, 2004
09:32:08 PM
Richard Harris WAS a good actor!
by drakeavenue
May 1st, 2004
10:26:39 PM
SERENITY NOW!
by greyspecter
May 1st, 2004
11:36:41 PM
You people are frightening
by MrCere
May 2nd, 2004
01:57:14 AM
pre-teen poontang
by Mel
May 2nd, 2004
03:43:04 AM
I've never read the books, you know, because....well, because th
by Charlie & Tex
May 2nd, 2004
12:45:45 PM
smoking hot at eighteen? she's smoking hot now!
by lush
May 2nd, 2004
02:17:44 PM
Joe Don Baker IS Voldemort!!
by ManosTHOF
May 2nd, 2004
03:47:59 PM
John Saxon? How 'bout Michael Ironside!
by Dr. Sid Schaefer
May 2nd, 2004
06:18:40 PM
"Hermione" on SNL
by The Pretzelman
May 2nd, 2004
07:07:15 PM
Emma Watson's clit
by Indiana Clones
May 3rd, 2004
02:00:49 AM
Harry Potter vs LOTR
by Indiana Clones
May 3rd, 2004
02:09:55 AM
SIRIUS BLACK!!!
by LOTR FANATIC
May 3rd, 2004
03:35:30 AM
Voldemort wish list
by steve_buscemi
May 3rd, 2004
04:39:18 AM
Only one man can play Voldemort and let the series retain any cr
by full_time_killer
May 3rd, 2004
05:10:25 AM
David Bowie for Voldemort!
by ZeroCorpse
May 3rd, 2004
10:23:42 PM
Stop it with the HP vs LOTR thing!
by Mushroom
May 4th, 2004
10:37:33 PM

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