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Herc

Published at: Feb. 11, 2004, 2:49 a.m. CST

Star Trek: Enterprise 3.15 FAQ

What’s it called?

“Harbinger.”

Who’s responsible?

Teleplay is credited to “Odyssey 5” creator Manny Coto (“Similitude,” “Chosen Realm”).

What does TV Guide say?

“A dying alien (Thomas Kopache) refuses to disclose his motives for exploring a spatial anomaly; Trip's interest in a pretty corporal sparks a heated exchange with T'Pol; Reed quarrels with a colleague over training drills. Amanda Cole: Noa Tishby.”

The big news?

T’Pol and Trip have hot naked sex this week!

Is this a dream, a hoax, or an imaginary episode?

Nope. The chief engineer admits he likes-likes her, the chief science officer takes off every stitch she’s wearing, and the pair bone like bunnies.

How naked precisely does T’Pol become?

We essentially see nothing that’s not in the promos.

Is T’Pol in the throes of Pon Farr?

I – You know, I’m not certain. Do girls get Pon Farr?

Well, does T’Pol battle her earthling rival to the death with large Vulcan weapons that are blunt on end and sharp on the other?

No, that doesn’t happen. But there is a lot of non-phaser-related violence this week.

What else is TV Guide not telling us?

The dying alien actually does eventually spit out a few hints about what’s going on with the spheres and the anomolies and the thing and the other. And there’s a tremendous fight between Reed and the head MACO.

What’s good?

The big fight scene is amusing in its refusal to abate, and Jolene Blalock contributes the best horny Vulcan since “Amok Time.”

What’s not so good?

Aside from all the exciting sex and Reed’s foray into fight club, not much really happens. For all its entertainment value, this episode doesn’t have an idea in its head; it’s one of the emptiest installments of “Star Trek” ever produced.

How does it end, spoiler-boy?

“When the Xindi destroy Earth, my people will prevail!”

Herc’s rating for “Enterprise” 3.15?

***

The Hercules T. Strong Rating System:
***** better than we deserve
**** better than most motion pictures
*** actually worth your valuable time
** as horrible as most stuff on TV
* makes you quietly pray for bulletins

8 p.m. Wednesday. UPN.

I am – Hercules!!





Looking for bumper stickers, plush toys and girls’ underwear covered with cartoon double-amputees? Visit The Herc Store!

Readers Talkback

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  • Feb. 11, 2004, 2:53 a.m. CST

    First, sluts

    by spillor

  • Feb. 11, 2004, 3:07 a.m. CST

    Thanks herc

    by Lukecash

    Glad to see an Enterprise episode review up here. And it's good to see that you found yourself amused by it. The strength of this years enterprise is that they do have sort of a continuity running...so while this episode may not stand well alone, it could actually be payoff for some of the sub plots that have been running.

  • Feb. 11, 2004, 5:01 a.m. CST

    Wow

    by raw_bean

    T'Pol gets down and dirty and my man Reed dishes out some whup ass? *sigh*, shame I'll have to wait ages to see it, living in the UK.

  • Feb. 11, 2004, 5:23 a.m. CST

    Finally, something happens on this show.

    by Hamsterstyle

    I just caught the live feed of the ep and I must say that i think this has been one of the strongest episodes this season. The entire episode was a collection of subplots, overall I found the interaction between the security officers to be entertaining, and the sex between T'pol and Trip to be a breath of fresh air for a series that is never brave enough to explore sexuality between crewmembers. I mean come on, your stuck on a damn spaceship for six months on end of course your gonna hook up with someone.

  • Feb. 11, 2004, 5:54 a.m. CST

    Jolene Blalock looks like a fish

    by Fatty McJones

    I'm sorry, she does.

  • Feb. 11, 2004, 7:47 a.m. CST

    I thought Vulcans only get it on during Pon Farr?

    by warp11

    I mean what gives? Vulcans are suppose to be about controling their emotions. Spock had some problems now and again, but heck he was half human or some alien race was messing with him. But T'Pol just goes right for it? Is Jealosy an emotion? I always thought it was great when Chocktay bitches out Tuvac after he learns he has been lying to him the whole time he has been a Maki. He is like, dude Vulcans can't lie right? So what's up with you pulling this shit? and Tuvac is all like, umm it was logical. and BAM! Choctay was like Vulcans just pretty much use their logic to justify whatever they want. and Tuvac was like yep. When I want good Star Trek I'll stick to songs by Warp 11. At least those are still fun and stick to cannon. www.warp11.com, www.warp11bb.com. Thanks for the Enterprise Talkback!

  • Feb. 11, 2004, 7:57 a.m. CST

    to anticipate the "Trek is Dead" comments

    by warp11

    Yea, yea, we have all heard that Berman might go bye bye really soon. But what are the odds of getting someone behind trek that will really be able to bring the genre back? Who can you get that will look at trek and think, "Heck,I love this shit! Let's take this back and give the fanboys what they want!, and you know wthat? When teh fanboys are happy, people will start wanting to find out why all the fan boys don't think Trek is dead. Domino effect!" Heck, do something with the borg! No NO, no something lame like they have done ON enterprise, but I mean like run into the race(s) as they start playing around with technology and are thinking about creating collectives and adding everyone's tech to their own. Make it something like the race(s), get totally hurt or screwed over by something big, maybe somethign we have seen before in the original series, like the "Doomsday Device" or that other alien race where they patch in to its commuications to see the guy. And see after these race(s) get hurt they want it to never happen agian, so they get all into we need to do whatever possible to prevent this, so this tech with a collective might make us stronger, and we got to lash out and get other tech before something like this happens agian, and thus we see the borg born. Still more fun than see Species 8479 just destryoing cubes left and right. I remember when it used to be, shit a cube! What are they going to do? Now it is like, oh cubes aren't that bad ass anymore. yea. Warp 11 rocks!!!!!! Red Alert is a great album!!!!! Everything I do, I do with William Shatner is a great single!

  • Feb. 11, 2004, 9:04 a.m. CST

    This was a damn good episode...........

    by KennyB

    This was some great stuff this week. Just about everything in season 3 has been great and this is just setting up some MAJOR things about to go down......Vulcan ass clevage is quite nice too!

  • Feb. 11, 2004, 1:33 p.m. CST

    Pon Farr

    by Don Lockwood

    I always thought Pon Farr was when they HAD to have sex and prove themselves to their mate, but not necessarily the ONLY time they could have sex. If that's the case, Spock's mom was one lonely human housewife, if you know what I mean. Or maybe it's different with female Vulcans. As far as finding the race that eventually becomes the Borg, at one point, I thought that was what they were setting the Xindi up for. You know, Earth comes in and breaks them up and the Future Guy shows up (hey, what happened to THAT subplot?) and gives them tech and births the Borg. However, they're waaaaaaay too close to Earth and such for them to be the race that Q throws the TNG crew at, so I dismissed it. Unless of course FG also relocates them for his dasterdly revenge...

  • Feb. 11, 2004, 6:03 p.m. CST

    the last two episodes kicked ass

    by Tall_Boy

    due for an off-week anyway.

  • Feb. 11, 2004, 6:36 p.m. CST

    why does this get 3 stars?

    by MisterGrimloch

    the eventual comment on this episode is that it is one of the emptiest entries ever for Star Trek. why then, does the author of this "review" (snicker) proceed to give it 3 stars. or did my eyes horridly fail me?

  • Feb. 11, 2004, 7:35 p.m. CST

    3 Stars!

    by Real Deal

    Well Grimsy maybe it has something to do with him acctually watching the episode.

  • Feb. 11, 2004, 7:48 p.m. CST

    real deal...

    by MisterGrimloch

    yes, but indeed the comments he made seemed to indicate that he felt it was less than "actually worth your valuable time", which is what his three stars assesses for his own rating code. whatever. its not like i will ever see it.

  • Feb. 11, 2004, 8:52 p.m. CST

    Seeing It

    by Real Deal

    " whatever. its not like i will ever see it. " I know. So once again why bother posting about it?

  • Feb. 11, 2004, 9:28 p.m. CST

    RE: why does this get 3 stars?

    by rite4u

    ...because it had some T&A and a bunch of brawling, not much plot. So it was worth some valuable time to watch a popcorn episode; not very deep, plot-wise, yet worth watching nonetheless...

  • Feb. 11, 2004, 10:54 p.m. CST

    Bakula needs a Shatner blood transfusion...

    by Commando Cody

    I mean, I like Bakula -- I was glad they picked him for the lead, I thought he could bring something tangible to the Captain's chair -- but am I the only one who finds that Archer overthinks and emotes but never gets enough Shatner/Kirk action AS the Captain on this show? I mean, this episode Reed's doing the fighting and Trip's boning T'Pol! Meanwhile, what -- Archer gets to walk his dog or something? You KNOW if Kirk was running the NX-01 that by now he'd be cockily sitting in his captain's chair looking over at Reed smiling and saying "Hey, already tore my shirt and did some body rolls and some karate chops to the neck and beat ALL the marines on board"... and then he'd be looking at Trip saying "And you can have her AFTER I'm done, buddy. But I got enough sex drive that might not be till this mission's over!"

  • Feb. 11, 2004, 11:30 p.m. CST

    TrekBBS Blows Goats!

    by Captain Decker

    Ban THIS, bitches! Well, lessee... those two smirking frat-boy jackasses Berman and Braga are reaching for the ol' sexual exploitation button in a desperate attempt to save their skins, huh? Predictable AND entertaining. Their willingness to whore anything that moves for an extra rating point, I mean, not the crap they spew forth every week. If they lose another 100,000 or so households tonight, you know canon will, once again, be "re-imagined" to include the "Ancient Vulcan Cock-meld".

  • Feb. 11, 2004, 11:46 p.m. CST

    Vulcan Poon

    by Kentucky Colonel

    Of course the Vulcan women get Pon-Far. Savick discusses it with Spock in STIII:The Search for Spock, so extrapolating a little one could reason women got the bug, too. And T'Pring was there at Spock's land "at the appointed time" so likewise one would guess the ladies are just as inclined biologically as the fellows. However, T'Pol, if indeed in the throes of Pon Far, why isn't she heading back home to her Vulcan paramour? And as Spock said it's not something discussed with "outworlders". But what the hell, sex sells and (in this case) I'm buying. Balock is hot in a way Ryan never could be (IMHO Ryan is pretty gross). And besides, we know that Vulcans have green blood, and therefore the genital & nipple areas of Vulcan women ( and men) are tinted greenish. Hell yeah, boy, T'Pol and her green twinkie!!! Mmmmmm, boy!

  • Feb. 12, 2004, 1:01 a.m. CST

    Ok, I haven't seen an episode in a while, so...

    by Rein

    Is Trip a clone now? And who are these MACO guys? They have tech that's two or three years ahead of StarFleet; so, MACO isn't StarFleet? That being said, I did really like this one. I don't think it was empty at all. Although I do get the feeling that they need to figure out this Xindi stuff quick, as it seems like they've just been spinning their wheels.

  • Feb. 12, 2004, 1:26 a.m. CST

    Star Trek 90210

    by DontKnowJacK

    Nuff Said!

  • Feb. 12, 2004, 10:42 a.m. CST

    Real Deal, haven't you learned yet?

    by MisterGrimloch

    you ask why i bothered to post about the episode. well, it was because i can. and admittedly, i had intended to tune into this last night. as to why i would want to bother, thats anyone's guess. will this be repeated, and when? cutestofborg, surely you must know when this program will be repeated, eh? and did you arrange the AICN gangbang with Jolene yet?

  • Feb. 12, 2004, 1:54 p.m. CST

    Jolene is a Wonder

    by Homer_Simpson

    There's been some speculation recently about who would play Wonder Woman if that movie ever gets made. I've been thinking about it and trying to figure out who could pull off such a role. The two names being tossed around were Charisma Carpenter and Sarah Michelle Gellar. I don't see either of them in that role. I think Jolene Blaylock though could pull it off. I'm not usually a fan of fake boobs, but you gotta admit, this chick has an unbelievable body... plus, she can act!

  • Feb. 12, 2004, 2:05 p.m. CST

    T'Pols Ass need I say more

    by cornstalkwalker

  • Feb. 12, 2004, 2:27 p.m. CST

    What happened to the MACO chick?

    by Christopher3

    Show just forgot her halfway thru.

  • Feb. 12, 2004, 3:02 p.m. CST

    Don't you wish ....

    by TodayzSpecial

    Don't you wish Joss Whedon was given Star Trek? Firefly rocked ... took the same star trek situation and somehow made it interesting ...

  • Feb. 12, 2004, 3:03 p.m. CST

    Don't you wish ....

    by TodayzSpecial

    Don't you wish Joss Whedon was given Star Trek? Firefly rocked ... took the same star trek situation and somehow made it interesting ...

  • Feb. 12, 2004, 3:07 p.m. CST

    t'pol, the universe and everything

    by TodayzSpecial

    I still find all the relationships on this show to be just shallow. I turn in everysooften just b/c t'pol is a hottie. Even then, it doesn't seem worth it.

  • Feb. 12, 2004, 3:28 p.m. CST

    Now That I've Seen It

    by Real Deal

    A good solid episode which didn't draw too many conclusions. My guess is because it's like it's title " Harbinger ". Kind of a look at things to come. Sorry boys the numbers for STE were up for last night.While this wasn't the best episode I've seen this year it was far from the worst. I agree with Herc. 3 stars.

  • Feb. 12, 2004, 4:32 p.m. CST

    Real Deal

    by Electric_Monk

    The thing is I took the time to watch, Real Deal. But the slippery slope the show continues on made me question what the point of the episode was, and why such an unstable captain is at the helm of the ship. Three stories populate this episode and by far the only interesting on was the alien in the pod, who strangely gets very little screen time. The whole Malcolm and Hays thing was just stupid and a throw back to a long gone era. How many shows especially produced in the 1960

  • Feb. 12, 2004, 5:40 p.m. CST

    Wake me when T'Pol has sex with Hoshi. BTW I thought Pon Farr wa

    by Big Bad Clone

    Getting horny, pissed, etc. was just goes along with losing control. So Vulcans could have sex whenever as long as it was logical (or whatever).

  • Feb. 12, 2004, 5:44 p.m. CST

    hilarious cartoon spoof

    by koondiman

    check out happyfappy.com. fucking funny ass shit.

  • Feb. 12, 2004, 5:59 p.m. CST

    wouldn't it be great if

    by TodayzSpecial

    Wouldn't it be great if Joss Whedon took over star trek? Firefly followed the Star Trek mold, but was INTERESTING! They keep crap like enterprise on just b/c we haven't been without a star trek show on the air for 16 years! The only reason to watch the show now is for the occasional T&A that T'Pol gives off. Its just not really worth it anymore.

  • Feb. 12, 2004, 6:31 p.m. CST

    REED IS AWESOME! His fight deserved five stars just for that sce

    by Tall_Boy

    I can see how that one scene elevated this to "worth your valuable time". the ass shot and Reed kicking ass was SO worth it.

  • Feb. 12, 2004, 8:33 p.m. CST

    T'Pol said in a first season episode that only men get pon far.

    by Voice O. Reason

    So there.

  • Feb. 12, 2004, 8:55 p.m. CST

    Electric Monk

    by Real Deal

    Well the kind of fights Malcom and the MACO were having happen in my workplace all the time ( a little more calmly but the same testosterone fest ). The rest about the FX and stuff was just reaching. I think this episode was about things to come on the show. The thing about the captin being unstable is intended and will come to as head in a future episode. Like I said in another post it's like the title " Harbinger ". That's why there were no conclusions to all these seperate elements.

  • Feb. 12, 2004, 10:56 p.m. CST

    You have more faith than I, Real Deal

    by Electric_Monk

    As I mentioned earlier, Future Tense from last year -the one with the probe that was bigger on the inside than the outside -seemed to be hinting at something, but then was never mentioned again. The same can be said about Stigma, as there has never been a mention of T'Pol's AIDS like illness again. These are great plot points, and arc's that would be great if they mentioned them again, since they went out of their way to show it. Are these just "filler" episodes between the mythology shows? If they are, then what's the point of giving you the impression it fits into them, if they really don't? That's not drama, that's baiting and switching. Have you heard the story about the boy who cried wolf? Even when DS9 was fully in depth with the Dominion arc, none of it's stand alone stories tempted you with the notion they "might" be connected to the the Founders story. Enterprise seems to go out of its way to say "hey, watch this episode because it might be part of an arc" when it really isn't. And while Archer's near fascist persona maybe explained by the end of the season, Berman and Braga have crossed a moral ambiguity line between presenting an entertaining story and showing what a bully really is. As for the fighting, unless this 1954 and On the Water Front is real, you can't expect me to believe men still fight over who's more macho. If they still do, then they deserve to be punished by Archer Dad. Finally, the visual effects with the alien walking through the ship was not reaching. It was not up to par, and found it very distracting. In the end, both Berman and Braga are going to have to pull a lion out of hat to tie all the loose ends up and still make Archer look noble and all American.

  • Feb. 12, 2004, 11:54 p.m. CST

    was there some wierd sexual tension

    by pablo2004

    between Malcolm and the MACO Commander?

  • Feb. 13, 2004, 1:41 a.m. CST

    "shame I'll have to wait ages to see it, living in the UK."

    by Col. Klink

    ummmmm, you did know that you can download every new episode off the internet, didn't you?

  • Feb. 13, 2004, 1:43 a.m. CST

    Star Drek

    by kferris61

    Does ANYBODY actually watch this show???? I do not know a single person who still watches it.

  • Feb. 13, 2004, 1:23 p.m. CST

    Trek's less than stellar future...

    by Electric_Monk

    "Star Trek: Enterprise might not be soaring through space next season," began an article on UPN's future plans, quoting CBS and UPN chairman Leslie Moonves on the possibility that Enterprise might not return for a fourth season. In a Scripps Howard News Service reprinted in the Tri-City Herald, Moonves said, You see the new stuff, you see the old stuff, and you compare and say, 'What is the better schedule?' So it's not like, 'Gee, if Enterprise is up 10 percent between now and May, it will get picked up.' It's rather - you know, it's not a science, but it's, 'All right. How do we build Wednesday better?' 'Does it include Enterprise?' Very possibly. 'Does it not?' Possibly as well. Stating that the fate of the series will remain uncertain for several months - at least until April, when the network will review its 2004-5 schedule, Moonves added that instead of being cancelled, Enterprise might move to Friday nights - a move long predicted by Mediaweek Programming Insider Marc Berman. UPN entertainment president Dawn Ostroff, who along with Moonves announced the development of an as-yet-untitled reality show about five sheltered Amish teens living in the outside world, promised that Enterprise would have many twists and turns for the rest of the season. As has been widely reported, Enterprise has suffered declining ratings over the course of the past two seasons. Despite critical praise of the action-oriented story arc established this season, ratings remain down from last year.

  • Feb. 13, 2004, 1:59 p.m. CST

    Electric Monk

    by Real Deal

    Yes I saw the article also. The show about amish teens sounds like everything that's wrong with TV today. So I wouldn't have a hard time believing UPN would do this. However some of the plot points you've talked about I've read are coming back this season. Yes I think it's time for some major revelations regarding the Xindi / spheres/time travel aspect/and how STE will connect this all up to the ST we've all known. I've heard a lot of that is coming this season. They may be holding of trying to figure out if they should give it a good ending this season ( due to cancelation ) or parcel it out as originally intended. J. Micheal Stratzynski had this problem in the 4th year of B5. The result was the lackluster 5th year. I still say if it's canceled SF on TV fans will NOT be the better for it. Thank god BSG03 is on SciFi's schedule because what we have available is getting smaller and smaller.

  • Feb. 13, 2004, 9:38 p.m. CST

    Well what's on keeps getting smaller, and smaller......

    by Real Deal

    Well now that the word is that Angel is canceled maybe you guys will believe me? Soon it'll be nothing but the scumbag of the TV universe " The Reality Show ". Anything else with imagination is going away. If STE goes maybe I should just get out my quiet urp bag now. No, I mean it kids TV land is going to be a very boring. The saving grace is that shows will have less return on commercials and TV executives will still be wondering why their formula didn't work. Oh well, I guess I can watch DVD's until TV execs get their heads out of their asses. And please no " You should get a life " comments from the STE bashers. If you feel compelled to make comments like that then you don't care what the hell is on and have no real place in this thread. A very sad day.

  • Feb. 13, 2004, 10:25 p.m. CST

    Harbinger Dialog

    by BeeSssJay

    What were the final words of the dying alien? "When the Zindi destroy earth, my people will ___?__ ____?___

  • Feb. 13, 2004, 10:26 p.m. CST

    Hey Choggle Pants What Current TV Show Do you Like?

    by Real Deal

    Everytime I ask this question I don't really get an answer. That's because hating STE isn't the real reason most STE bashers are here.

  • Feb. 13, 2004, 10:27 p.m. CST

    Prevail

    by Real Deal

    " After earth is destroyed my people will prevail. "

  • Feb. 14, 2004, 3 a.m. CST

    Sorry

    by Real Deal

    Sorry but many of us don't feel that way. Also it's pretty frelling ( a Farscape fan ) obvious that the federation had to get that way some how.I mean how did the earth people get to be the head cheese when these other races were much more advanced? I'd liked to know and it would probably have to have something to do with extraordinary circumstances like the expanse.