Jan. 19, 2004, 2:13 a.m. CST
Jan. 19, 2004, 2:30 a.m. CST
by Cash Bailey
I'm not player hating on you big guy, but 'van dykes' (accompanied with three day growth) and plaid shirts are just not done these days. Shave, get a nice haircut a pimp new suit and try not to look like EVERY SINGLE aspiring screenwriter in the world. I'm tough because I care. Oh... and welcome back. Love the DVD column.
Jan. 19, 2004, 2:33 a.m. CST
I could see how he wouldn't look right in Episode 7. www.zeedarteretz.com
Jan. 19, 2004, 3:17 a.m. CST
Out of all the writers on this site you make the most sense. Especially when I see you pushing Northfork which I couldn't believe more people on this site didn't back in their year end lists. It seems even when I disagree with you though I still mantain a certain respect. Except for Daredevil, sorry but I just gotta call shannanigans on that one. Anyway you have to write more, this site is definitely starting to lose it's grass roots feel. And what happened to all the juicy rumors? Those were the backbone of the site for a time and we seem to be getting ALOT less of them these days. You also have the only reviews worth reading (The Butterfly Effect was just touted as a masterwork from Quint for God sakes!) Us readers could use a little help over here.
Jan. 19, 2004, 3:33 a.m. CST
by Darth Thoth
For your (Harry and Co.'s included) honesty and passion that keeps me coming back to this site. You're a real cat and I respect that a lot. I come to AICN because the LOVE you guys have for film and everything related, is evident and permeates from your reviews, comments, and just plain geek-talk. Much props and keep up the good work.
Jan. 19, 2004, 3:36 a.m. CST
by Darth Thoth
Mark Hamill is the MAN! Period. I can't wait to see his DVD.
Jan. 19, 2004, 5:09 a.m. CST
If they ever make a Spider-Man movie with Venom as the main villain, someone like the Jackal would be good for the first act as the warm-up before Eddie Brock meets up with the symbiote. And just listen to Hamill in the Batman series and say that with some alteration that wouldn't be perfect for a slimy bastard like the Jackal?
Jan. 19, 2004, 6:01 a.m. CST
Back to Back x-men movies why haven't I heard about this already if Mori's just tossing it out there like it's old news. Oh Mori now you've set yourself realistic goals I hope you stick to them. AICN wouldn't of been half as enjoyable without your input down the years.
Jan. 19, 2004, 6:03 a.m. CST
by Gere's AssGerbil
Or maybe that only happens to Scientologists.
Jan. 19, 2004, 7:55 a.m. CST
Why do so many nerds wear reading glasses that are shaded? Did something special happen in 1983 that you are paying homage to? Clear lenses, dorks... it allows you to PRETEND to be not so nerdy. Works for me anyway.
Jan. 19, 2004, 8:23 a.m. CST
I was lucky enough to meet Mark last November after seeing him in the play SIX DANCE LESSONS IN SIX WEEKS. Much like Mori, I grew up with the Original trilogy as a part of my life and it was a complete thrill to finally meet him, even though I was mildly surprised to see that he's only as tall as me. (And I don't consider myself tall...) He was a really cool guy who seemed comfortable taking a moment to talk to each person as he signed autographs.
Jan. 19, 2004, 8:31 a.m. CST
by Max Rockatansky
That picture of you and Mark Hamill: Ugh! Get a toothbrush, man
Jan. 19, 2004, 8:44 a.m. CST
Ah, how quiet it can be without the incessant bitching of the angry fanboys. How much clearer could they be about what they want out of this site? Keep the "Van Helsing" + "Catwoman" TBs coming- they're the perfect playpen for those fanboys that just can't stop bitching. In the meantime, it's great to hear you're coming back as a regular, Mori. I've missed your reviews. Okay, I'm getting gushy now... sorry. Out.
Jan. 19, 2004, 9:07 a.m. CST
What's more, I BOUGHT the DVD to Reloaded and haven't bothered to watch it yet. Hear that Wachowskis? sk
Jan. 19, 2004, 10:34 a.m. CST
Gee, u look funny, man!!! A couple of friends o
Jan. 19, 2004, 10:43 a.m. CST
by The Tao of Joe
We have had a plethora of excellent films come out this year. So many that some of the films we would put in our top five or ten for last year, wouldn't even make the list this year. This was a GREAT year for films. We had In America, Big Fish, X2, The Matrix Sequels (some hate them, but must accept some skill was involved in their making), Pirates, Open Range, City of God (one of the greatest fucking films ever made), Dirty Pretty Things, May, Lost in Translation, School of Rock, American Splendor, Bad Santa, Stevie, Capturing the Friedmans, Spellbound, Whale Rider, Bend it Like Beckham, Kill Bill Vol. 1, Return of the King... I still havent seen Cold Mountain, Peter Pan, The Station Agent, Thirteen, The Magdeline Sisters, Monster, and the list goes on. This was a great year for films. As good as 1999 I would dare say. It was definitely better than the last two years. ToJ out.
Jan. 19, 2004, 3:14 p.m. CST
What? Someone at AICN actually types in coherent sentences? No super exaggerated ellipses or pointless ramblings? I enjoyed your column man, and look forward to reading more from you.
Jan. 19, 2004, 4:57 p.m. CST
The Joker will never be as good without your voice and laugh. Seriously, someone cast him as the Joker in the Batman movie.
Jan. 19, 2004, 5:44 p.m. CST
Good to have you back. I kinda figured you were a little bit over optimistic with the timetable for the dvd column, unless you'd found a way to cram 30 ours in a day and didn't sleep. I'm looking forward to seeing some more rumblings from the lab, and some more dvd stuff. (Incidentally, this in no way means that Harry didn't do a great job with his dvd picks. Among the esoteria there, I first heard that they were releasing Lost in Space's first season. Stupid UK release date is still five weeks away, but thanks for the heads up, big guy - it's on pre-order). Anyhoo- back to the point, welcome home.
Jan. 19, 2004, 6:46 p.m. CST
mmm...elf was for 10 year olds only. it looked like they cut all the funny stuff that ferrell did apart from a couple of scenes and the song at the end made me cringe...so much so that we had to leave the cinema. it was embarrassing. I also had to leave the cinema during master and commander. pity i really wanted to see the big battle scene at the end, but to sit thru all the crap was unbearable. it was like your national broadcaster's made by the BBC docu drama of the week. theres a big storm, then no wind, then a fight between the higher ranks, then a man overboard, then the ship be a phantom ship! arrrh! what a load of crap. and shakes the clown deserves to be with ET the video game buried in the middle of the desert somewhere. horrid. do not buy this on dvd on recommendation. what it first if you have any wonderings about this horrid piece of film making. er, that's it. i have just woken up. but man i'm looking forward to comic book the movie. i love me mockumentary stuff dearly. my fave genre.
Jan. 19, 2004, 6:49 p.m. CST
er, "watch it first"
Jan. 19, 2004, 7 p.m. CST
by Mr. High
....PLEASE STOP SHOWING PICTURES OF MARK HAMILL!!!!!!! It's like watching my grandfather wither away from cancer while stubbornly insisting he can still handle non-filtered Camels. Every time I see him, I expect a Quicktime feature of his face sliding off his skull. It's bad enough that Carrie Fisher, THE FIRST WOMAN TO INSPIRE ME TO PLAY WITH THAT STRANGE THING BETWEEN MY LEGS, has to consume 85 boxes of honey buns every day or she'll die. Harrison Ford looks like he has AIDS. Pater Mayhew....well, he's just a dick and a half. That fucker should just be killed. It's not like you'd even know who he was if he didn't wear a name tag that said, "HI, I'M THE GUY WHO PLAYED CHEWBACCA!" He's a rude, intolerant fucko who doesn't deserve a single fucking fan. Cocksucker. David Prowse....man, let me tell you, he should've played Darth Vader with his mask off. That guy is just friggin' scary. My point is this: STAR WARS is PRECIOUS to me. It's a once great franchise that unfortunately my childhood is forever linked with, like my father, my first kiss, my G.I. Joe collection, "Porky's", "The A-Team" and my father's collection of "Swedish Erotica" porno mags. (You know I didn't see a pussy without an afro until I was twenty???? Women loved to hide their shit back then didn't they?) Well, My father was just stricken blind from diabetes and that's just wierd for me, because my dad was always the premium bad ass in my life and now he calls me to come over and kick the crap out of his new wife's drunken ex-husband, (GOD I STOMPED HIS ASS! I'll be lucky if I don't see jail time out of that one. One of his nuts POPPED when I hit it with the hammer!!!! God that was a great day! I love causing embarrassing, permanent damage to people! But, I digress...) He's this shiveled, helpless TINY guy now and everything I always thought about him is right out the fucking window when I watch that new woman he's married to spoon feed him. I ran into the first girl I ever kissed the other day AND SHE'S GOT NO FUCKING TEETH!!!!!!!!! It was horrible, it was like waking up and realized that your sweet, beautiful bride has turned into a Plumpers centerfold. I tossed some cookies in the general direction of that one. "G.I. Joe" is just too goddamn expensive, not to mention seriously stupid in retrospect, I mean a terrorist organization with a standing army INSIDE THE U.S.???? Bush would love that shit. "Porky's", Ah Porky, my beloved fat peddler of ugly female flesh. "American Pie" is nothing compared to you, you're the only thing that's never let me down. "The A-Team"???? Tried to watch it, then realized that Face was in love with Hannibal and the reason that B.A. is so annoyed with Murdock isn't because he's a pilot, it's because he's B.A.'s prison bitch and just won't stop reminding him of the ten years he partook of the manlovin'. "Swedish Erotica"??? GodDAMN! It's safe to say that the 70's, while getting the whole porn ball rolling, were the WORST spot in porno history. Nothing but hairy apes having their way horse faced dopers with droopy tits and too much pubic hair. Ewwww. Actually, what I was trying to say is, that my illusions are shattered to fuck and I'm mad about it. I don't think I'm one of those people that was geared toward growing up. I come home every day and can't understand why my mom hasn't cleaned up my apartment. Boston Market kind of copies my mother's bland approach to everything, but it's not the same. I have to pay bills and that sucks. My girlfriend is shit at taking care of me when I'm sick. My job doesn't have field trips. Everyone expects me to be 'responsible' like I know what that word means. Santa doesn't bring me SHIT anymore AND I WAS FUCKING GOOD LAST YEAR GODDAMMIT!!!!!!! I never once, drove through puddles to intentally splash children with icy water, I never once asked my girlfriend for anal sex (she uh, she asked for it, not me), I never once snuck into a flick without paying, I never once got so drunk I couldn't remember if the chick I fucked the might before was a man or not, I never once used any racial slurs, I never once punched the guy at the comic shop for recommending something shitty, I never once pissed through the cracked window of a car that parked too close to me, I never once stomped a little, scumbarking rat dog to shit, WHERE'S MY FUCKING SWAG, SANTA YOU FUCK???? I'm just not ready to grow up, I'm never going to be ready, at all, never. So when I read this site, I expect to see some news about flicks that will postpone my trip to CROTCHETYVILLE AS LONG AS FUCKING POSSIBLE!!! Not, see the actors from my favorite flicks, decomposing. It's just fucked up. I'd like to introduce legislation that would force all people who are aging unattractively to be locked in cryostorage until a cure can be found to make them pretty again. THINK OF IT! George could freeze himself until they find a cure for insanity and there could be new STAR WARS FLICKS, WHEN I'M EIGHTY!!!!! WOO HOO!!!! Halley's Comet, Cyborg-LoveBots, Space Travel, Genetic cures for everything and NEW STAR WARS FLICKS!!!! The futures looking up! But, what was I saying? Oh yeah, Chicks should definitely shave their shit. There's nothing worse getting hair in your food. No, that wasn't it. I was talking about illusions. STOP RUINING MINE!!! Other than that, great job, keep it up and in case you haven't heard, The Atkin's Diet really does work. My uncle went on it and aside from looking like Gollum, he's in great shape!!! Check it out! Tell Harry!
Jan. 19, 2004, 8:08 p.m. CST
Weeny is putting this excuse for a children's movie on his list?? we had tons of great movies this year,incredibly funny jones , others totally heartbreaking...and moriarty comes up with ELF????? sweet lord.
Jan. 19, 2004, 10:54 p.m. CST
I'm sure Moriarty agrees with me...
Jan. 19, 2004, 11:32 p.m. CST
Jan. 20, 2004, 12:37 a.m. CST
by TheGinger Twit
Jan. 20, 2004, 1:33 a.m. CST
by Don Lockwood
So, let me get this straight. You were jazzed to meet Mark Hamill, the hero of your childhood, the coolest of your cool, one of the guys you were just dying to meet, someone you sat through watching an unfinished C-grade straight-to-video movie just to have lunch with.... ...but you couldn't at the very least SHAVE?!? Oy.
Jan. 20, 2004, 1:39 a.m. CST
Not what I expected at all. What with all your ramblings about "tough workouts at the gym" and going on about your girl... I half had hope that you were the anti-geek movie stud I had in my mind, but alas...another geekdom stereotype is reinforced. I'm a personal trainer and nutritionist, e-me and I'll hook you up. Think of it as "Queer eye for the Geek guy" hmmm...why didn't I think of that sooner....
Jan. 20, 2004, 1:41 a.m. CST
I can't believe that X2 is only making it on everyones "Almost" Best List. Honestly guys...X2 was fucking brilliant! How many times this year did you leave the theatre with your expectations not only met, but exceeded. C'mon I saw it 4 times in the theatre...
Jan. 20, 2004, 4:02 a.m. CST
by jules windex
I seem to be the only person who thought Whale Rider was just ok, nothing special.
Jan. 20, 2004, 4:08 a.m. CST
by Darth Thoth
X2 was brilliant, confident, and the best comic book movie ever. It was funny, had efficient yet deep character development, great undertones speaking to real life issues, and it moved at a breathtaking pace. Excellent.
Jan. 20, 2004, 7:13 a.m. CST
Jan. 20, 2004, 8:20 a.m. CST
by Smilin'Jack Ruby
Insert, "Ah, so you're the one" Kafka joke here.
Jan. 20, 2004, 10:12 a.m. CST
hey guess what asshole, actors get old, now why don't you do the same and grow the fuck up. finally get to see what moriarty looks like. Lucas should have foccussed on sequels, not prequels.
Jan. 20, 2004, 1:21 p.m. CST
Welcome back...And thanks for throwing me for a loop with your choices of film favs this year. Elf? Oh dear, I may have to work on forgiving you for that one. But I rejoiced when I read your point perfect comments on my favorite film of the year, Master and Commander, was angry at the way it was promoted, ie, an action film. It was nothing of the kind, as you noted. It was a brilliant recreation of a world long gone, with wonderful performances from Crowe and Bettany, believable slices of a life never to be seen again...all beautiful, engaging and intelligent. It's not a film for kiddies with short attention spans. I thought it had one of the most wonderful, unpredicatable endings I've seen in ages [Crowe telling us all we need to know with a quiver of his lower eye lid], and how I hope there will another. Weir is a genius. Crowe is magnificent, Bettany has moved up high on my "to watch" list. But you goofed on one thing... women loved the film too.
Jan. 20, 2004, 1:36 p.m. CST
I thought you looked like the cartoon picture, dog. But you just look like a regular person.
Jan. 20, 2004, 1:43 p.m. CST
200 Millions opening week-end, easy.
Jan. 20, 2004, 3:22 p.m. CST
Nerdiest sentences EVER
Jan. 20, 2004, 6:53 p.m. CST
by Sith Witch
When you hid behind an alias all was well for using your invite without question...
Jan. 20, 2004, 8:10 p.m. CST
A few moments made me smile ("did you just fart?"), but it was so incredibly cliched (just like the director's other film, GEORGE WASHINGTON)
Jan. 20, 2004, 8:39 p.m. CST
is drews last name REALLY McWeeny? No, really? REALLY??!? well it should be drew Mc WEINER hahahahahahah GET IT?!?!?!? I AM THE GREATEST COMEDIAN WHO EVER LIVED
Jan. 20, 2004, 8:42 p.m. CST
by Bill Maher
I know that ignorant jack-offs call Hamill's acting in Star Wars "bad". Fuck 'em! They're ignorant jackoffs! I defy anyone to name another actor of Hamill's vintage who could have done it better. I'll give you a hint: There aren't any!
Jan. 20, 2004, 8:51 p.m. CST
by Bill Maher
Do you nerds have any idea how much money I spent playing video games in the lobby of the local theatre? Hollywood Homicide and Cold Mountain are the only movies I watched all the way through and that was only because I ran out of quarters.
Jan. 20, 2004, 9:11 p.m. CST
Brilliant work my man. I look forward to seeing more from you.
Jan. 21, 2004, 10:05 a.m. CST
by Bruce LeeRoy
because nerds are smart.
Jan. 21, 2004, 11:25 a.m. CST
DAMN IT MORI - YOU SPENT ALL THAT TIME WITH MARK HAMILL AND YOU DID NOT BOTHER TO ASK WHEN HE IS GOING TO MAKE THE FUCKING SEQUEL TO "CORVETTE SUMMER"???????? ARRRGGGHHHH! DAMN IT! WHO DO I HAVE TO FUCKING WAYLAY INTO TO FIND OUT WHEN MARK AND ANNIE POTTS ARE GOING TO REUNITE ON CELLULOID??? And thus, I'm very pissed! - - - George, The 7th Chicken!!!!
Jan. 21, 2004, 10:45 p.m. CST
McW is pretty scary looking. Not as bad as Harry, but bad enough. He definitely needs to clean up his act. I agree on Hamill. He should never be seen in front of a camera again. He has aged badly, frighteningly so in fact. As has Harrison Ford. Hell, Ford could play the Mummy in the next Mummy flick. I saw Princess Leia on some live talk show this morning, and she looked absolutely frightful. These three should get together and play the witches in MACBETH. No makeup needed.