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Vintage Review: Kinji Fukasaku's MESSAGE FROM SPACE - aka what Disney ripped off for TREASURE PLANET!
Hey folks, Harry here... MESSAGE FROM SPACE is not a new film. It is not being restored and brought to a theater near you as a rerelease. No, there isn't a great DVD of it being made for worldwide consumption anytime soon. In fact, the best way to see this film is at Quentin Tarantino's house, or at the Dobie Theater about 5 years ago one early morning. But since both of those is nigh impossible to get to do, finding a copy on EBAY is your most likely only chance to see this. I genuinely love MESSAGE FROM SPACE. While watching it, you can't help but think... Did George Lucas see this and take the whole Asteroid sequence from EMPIRE STRIKES BACK from it? Which would only be fair, as Fukasaku was liberally ripping off STAR WARS with this film to begin with... However, the Disney ripping off of it for TREASURE PLANET was just incredibly obvious. What follows is a review of wonder and discovery at the joys of MESSAGE FROM SPACE. The reviewer has some rather tasteless and insane things to say about the film and some of the cast, in particular, Vic Morrow... but you've been warned. I can not recommend the joys of this film enough... also seek out INVASION OF THE NEPTUNE MEN if you get a chance. It's also great Sonny Chiba crazy funky sci-fi fun! And hopefully, somebody somewhere will put that and MESSAGE FROM SPACE on DVD soon!
When you just can't help but shake your head, in a good way at a film, made laughably unskillfully by a talented director, there's only one thing you want to do... TELL OTHERS ABOUT THAT FILM AS QUICK AS HUMANELY FUCKING POSSIBLE.
I've known about Message From Space for quite some time. It's one of the early Star Wars rip-offs. It stars Sonny Chiba, and is directed by Kinji 'Just Change My Name To Include The Parathensis (Battle Royale) For All Time' Fukasaku. But I swear, halfway through, you will guarantee yourself it was made by the only two Japanese Kamikazee pilots to ever survive the raid on Perl Harbor, who got enough money and cocaine together and just dared each other each day as to who could direct the more fucked up movie.
What I didn't know about the film, is that it starred Rick Springfield (at least his lost twin) as a coked up looking and acting Luke Skywalker. This is on display early in a Smokey The Bandit type chase scene where Luke, and his Asian friend, are doing chicken runs with their jet planes through the desserts of, oh, let's call it Tattooney, and are being chased by the Asian version of Smokey. Now, Luke Springfield is laughing and laughing, and laughing and laughing and laughing hysterically all throughout the chase. And it's the kind of special effects chase they didn't even bother to try and cloak the wires the model planes were flying on. The kind of chase that you'd debate in your head if you could make it look more real doing it yourself with spare popsicile sticks and a free hour in the afternoon. Though even with the laughing, and maybe because of the laughing, the scene is horribly enjoyable.
Now, to get off the subject, which the film does plenty of time nonsensically over and over on it's own, there is something you should prepare yourself for, the dialogue. I KNOW, GASP! How could it be bad??? Well, I can't say for sure, because even though it was dubbed, I couldn't make out a single fucking thing. It was the first movie I've ever watched where the dubbing needed it's own subtitles. BUT IN A CHARMING WAY.
And that's what this film is. A charming early rip-off, you know just conceived hours after the filmmakers first saw Star Wars. The kind that's just filled with Japanese gittiness, only found in young kids after they learn a new curse word and want to use the shit out of it. This all makes for, in my opinion, the most insanely charming bad movie ever. And I haven't even gotten to the good part yet. Vic Morrow.
Yes, ol' Headless Morrow's in this one. And it looks like he's drunk throughout the whole thing. Or that some Yakuza member that helped fund this thing held a gun to his hip for the enitre shoot. One of my favorite scenes in paticular, is a Cantina scene, with Morrow, a shot glass of liquor, and a little gay robot, 1/6 scale the size of the bigger gay one from Lost In Space. In the scene Morrow is kicking back the shots of J.D., only to notice that at the bottom of his glass, is a magic plastic walnut. I shit you not. A MAGIC PLASTIC WALNUT, to which he responds, "I have been chosen". To which the little gay robot responds, "Wheeee!" - I actually think they may have even referred to it as the magic PLASTIC walnut, not even bothering to leave out it's obvious prop description, though I can't be sure, since there were no subtitles for the dubbing.
Now, a hater of bad cinema, would say that the karma from Vic Morrow's appearance in this turd carried over to him getting decapitated while filming Twilight Zone: The Movie. I disagree, because all the pain that a spinning whirly bird blade could inflict, would not even register as pain, if you saw the look of utter disgust and contempt on Morrow's face throughout this film. Even the scenes where he's hickup drunk.
Also, just to round out the Wizard of Oz like cast, to give you a better view of what we're dealing with here, there's a retarded pimp, a non retarded pimp, a princess, Sonny Chiba with a sword, and oh yeah, VIC MORROW'S UTTER AND COMPLETE CONTEMPT.
SPOLIER***
Yeah, don't read on unless you think you could possibly be surprised after anything else I could say about this movie. I wanna skip to the last battle though. The one between Sonny Chiba, who plays Hans, I kid you not, going up against some guy in.... black. Anywhofuck, the fight, with Chiba and blackey isn't half bad, in fact, if you've seen most Fukasaku movies with Chiba, especially in my opinion Legend Of The Eight Samurai, you'll know he and Fukasaku work well together. The shot selection, framing, energy, all excellent. This one, while definetly not better than the rest, features Sonny stabbing the man in black right through the face, then throwing him out a window, shaped much like the one Luke falls out of in Empire Strikes Back during the Darth fight. Could this have been an inspiration? Did Lucas pillage another great Japanese filmmaker for insiration for his space opera?...... Riiiiight.
One of the best things I found out about this movie, after watching it, was the merchandising tie-ins. Films like this, are few and far between to have action figures, or even models of their space crafts, but no, not Message In Space. I'm assuming the dailies on this, and strong Yakuza influence/intimidation at the studios, convinced them that in fact little Kirosho's Christmas wouldn't be complete without a coked up Rick Skywalker action figure flying his Decade Hawk on chicken runs from an eye patched Japanese Smokey. I even found out that some of these things wound up in arcades around Maryland, during the mid 1990's, in the bargin bins for the retarded kids who could only win one ticket from Skeetball to pick something with. This was their prize.
If you are ever Chiba craved enough to pick a bootleg of this up from eBay, be sure to watch the whole thing all the way through, and without any drugs. Not that drugs would ruin it, but a film this powerful, mixed with even the tiniest thread of pot, or Asprin, could easily make you jump out the window.... Just like Luke Springfield.
Harry, if you read this and decide to us it, call me Chris... because that's my name. Also, even if you don't and these 15 minutes of mine writing this were wasted, I just wanted to say thank you, even if I don't agree with 50% of your reviews, thank you for helping to introduce me to some films I really love.
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I'd rather talk about Britney Spears getting married to that guy. Or the Batman script review. Or my ass. sk
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CD Japan has the DVD
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right now. saw it last night and over the weekend. Get out the VCR!
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The King Arthur article had the best pictures I've seen on this site to date. Therefore, I have decided since nothing can compare, I won't read it unless there are pictures that are historically inaccurate.
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It's not like this is some rare film near impossible to find. Besides, Infra-Man is much better.
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that review is a barry crocker (shocker).
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I remember seeing this movie back around '78 and loved it. Of course, back in those days, we watched Godzilla movies every Saturday, so we were used to bad Japanese cinema. This movie is a classic...watch with your friends and laugh your ass off.
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Jan 08, 2004 12:25:52 PM CST
This instead of SPIDERMAN 2 script review, or BATMAN news, or an
by t.t. boy
I can't decide which site sucks more. This or CHUD. Both suck in special and unique ways. Both suck harder with each passin week. Each is pompous, overblown, and run by fat losers. Christ. I can't wait until the Oscar noms are announced and ROTK doesn't get nominated in every single category, so Harry can whine more about GOLLUM'S SONG or Fat Astin deserving an Oscar. Instead we get a look at an old movie about slanty-eyed fucks in spaceships. Whoppee.
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Jan 08, 2004 12:46:03 PM CST
Harry says he loves this movie, and then posts a vulgar, tastele
by guerillatokyo
Its on thing to love asian cinema for it cheesiness, its another to post absolutely tasteless reviews by pukefucks like this guy. This asshole is obviously trying to write his review like Neil Cumpston. unfortuneatly, he doesn't mask his unoriginality all that well. Shame on you Harry. Shame on you for posting a this disgusting neagative review by some shit heel who pretends to like the movie. Besides, there stuff going down on the Batman movie, and your throwing up vintage "reviews".
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Jan 08, 2004 12:56:46 PM CST
Can you then show some love for David Hasselhoff's light saber f
by declan_swartz
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You post this but not my insightful Leprechaun 6: Back 2 Da' Hood review??? The man that makes Leprechaun movies needs to be taken down.
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Jan 08, 2004 1:51:00 PM CST
MESSAGE IN SPACE is the only movie I've seen that made me scream
by koomoreborn
And Invasion of the Neptune Men was lampooned wonderfully on a MST3K ep that's easy to find on KaZaa. Where's my record?
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Its wrong to make fun of gooks. HAHAHA. Seriously Harry has some shitty ass taste in film to bother with trash like this.
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Must be where Wheadon got his idea for Firefly.
Sorry. -
Sorry, couldn't help myself...
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But my question is: Why does Legolas have to slide down things in the LOTR movies?
The TTT shield surfing scene is only outdone by the ROTK mumakil trunk slide in gayness. Otherwise, it was a fairly excellent trilogy. -
kamikazes at Pearl Harbor are an inaccuracy. On two levels. First, kamikazes didn't exist at the time of Pearl Harbor. Second, kamikazes are Japanese, whereas anyone who has watched Animal House knows that it was the *Germans* who bombed Pearl Harbor.
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Jan 08, 2004 6:01:39 PM CST
Lets make a trip to quentins house and DEMAND to see this film
by jon e cin
That would be fun.
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Damn harry for posting shit reviews crafted by illiterates. Check out Filmrot.com for intelligent reviews of all sorts of films.
Harry's been biting the fat penis for a while. But, what can you expect from an inbred redeck 2 ton piece of white trash anyways?
Fuck you harry! Go fuck yourself you cock! I hope your genitals fall off after fuching McWeeny's "fun lovin'" ass. You fucking shill fuck. -
Jan 08, 2004 6:16:38 PM CST
This guy ripped off half of his review from the first one on IMD
by jwblack67
Check it out.
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Hokay, lemme get this straight. First you lead with the premise that this movie, MESSAGE FROM SPACE, is what "Disney ripped off for TREASURE PLANET", never mind that TrPl was an obvious, blatant, and CREDITED retelling of Stevenson's TREASURE ISLAND, and then you print a badly written review that not only slams MFS, but identifies it as a STAR WARS rip-off. Man, it's been obvious for awhile that you've run out of stuff to say. But this cinches it. And, by the way, how many films DO you love mostest and bestest of all? 'Cause most people have, y'now, one.
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Jan 09, 2004 4:12:55 AM CST
A plea from a fellow film geek/writer who needs some feedback!
by dr_scott
Howdy, everyone. My name's Scott, and I'm yet another amateur film critic operating out of Dallas on the internet. I've finally corralled a section of a friend's webpage to post my online reviews (which are sent out to people on my mailing list; Heretofor, I was too lazy to set up a website, someone offered to give me the space), and I'm sending out word to all my fellow film geeks: Please stop by and read some of my stuff! We writers need ample feedback, and I figure my fellow bitter, cynical film geeks are the best people to ask for support! The friend who set up the pseudo-page for me is the director of FRIENDS WITH BENEFITS, which is a student-film/comedy set in an unnamed college, which you can find at friendswithbenefits.com. It's a pretty entertaining little flick, so feel free to check that out after reading some of my reviews! The address is http://fwb.proboards18.com, and my stuff is under "The Doctor's..." If you don't have time, don't worry about it. Just trying to spread the word. I have faith in you, fellow film geeks. Thanks! Dr.Scott
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Jan 09, 2004 4:14:46 AM CST
A plea from a fellow film geek/writer who needs some feeback...
by dr_scott
Howdy, everyone. My name's Scott, and I'm yet another amateur film critic operating out of Dallas on the internet. I've finally corralled a section of a friend's webpage to post my online reviews (which are sent out to people on my mailing list; Heretofor, I was too lazy to set up a website, someone offered to give me the space), and I'm sending out word to all my fellow film geeks: Please stop by and read some of my stuff! We writers need ample feedback, and I figure my fellow bitter, cynical film geeks are the best people to ask for support! The friend who set up the pseudo-page for me is the director of FRIENDS WITH BENEFITS, which is a student-film/comedy set in an unnamed college, which you can find at friendswithbenefits.com. It's a pretty entertaining little flick, so feel free to check that out after reading some of my reviews! The address is http://fwb.proboards18.com, and my stuff is under "The Doctor's..." If you don't have time, don't worry about it. Just trying to spread the word. I have faith in you, fellow film geeks. Thanks! Dr.Scott
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First up leave Vic Morrow out of this. He was the shit in COMBAT!, therefore does not need to be dissed by some ass wipe who couldn't find his own opinion unless somebody handed it to him.
Second, while Message From Space is a definent WTF was that experence, Battle Beyond The Stars is a much suckier, nacho cheesier and more laughable space opera rip off of Star Wars. Why? 1) It's from the Roger Corman school of bad cinema. 2) It has Robert Vaughn who is bad in every movie he's ever made. 3) It has John Boy from the Waltons as a starry eyed Luke Skywalker rip off. 4) It has some half Swedish alien - half Queen Amazonian - like warrior with HUGE fucking tits. 5) It even has space ships with breast implants!! 'Nuff said. Battle Beyond The Stars is a royal flush of bad taste while Message From Space is a two pair. MST3K where are you when we need you? -
Jan 10, 2004 12:20:52 AM CST
Uh, Harry, you do know that Treasure Planet was based on Treasur
by st.buggering
You did know that, right? Hello? But then, nothing lights up a film geek's black little heart like being able to say that a big-budget studio film "ripped off" a tiny, insignificant movie no one's heard of. That's crack to a film geek. They just love the word "rip-off".
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This does NOT sound like it has anything at all to do with Disney's EXCELLENT 'Treasure Planet'.
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Jan 11, 2004 9:18:22 PM CST
I saw it in the 70s along with Death of Honor and the Yagyu Cons
by watashiwadare
sorry
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back in 1995 me and some friends re audio'ed a message from space spinoff movie called Swords Of The Space Ark this movie used the same footage from message from space but with a new story with some of the same characters but with a drunken ape named Baron. It is awsome chessey fun. our version we replaced all the dialog and sound effects and music and made it a comedy. if you get a chance to watch messsage from space do it!
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Back in '78, I caught this movie with a friend at the Northcross Crackerbox Theater in Austin, drawn by the obvious Star Wars influences. In the first few minutes, we realized this was going to be hilariously bad, and started engaging in some pre-MST3K heckling in the theater. The glowing walnuts were particularly good fodder for wisecracks. We probably pissed off some people, but we had a good time. It still shows up every once in a while on Encore's WAM channel for kids. Last time I tried to watch it I fell asleep and dreamed about being in high school again.
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that you'd print this review?
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دردشه,
دردشه عربيه,
دردشه سعوديه ,
دردشه خليجيه,
دردشه مصريه,
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شات
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مواقع الرياضه
الادله والبحث
صور وتحميل
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اغانى طرب يوتيوب
تاجوج السودانيه
كافيه بنات
دردشه بنات
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دردشه,
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شات,
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سعودى كام,
خليجى كام,..
ماسنجر
العاب بنات
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العاب
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دردشه صوتيه
كتب الكترونى
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ثقافه جنسيه
برامج
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