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Things HARRY Learned from BNAT 5!

Hey folks, Harry here... Figured I'd join in on this format of Nordling's just a bit...

1. RETURN OF THE KING is the finishing flourish on what is definitively the greatest single narrative trilogy in the history of cinema. This film gives a new meaning to scope in film. A new meaning to the term epic. Peter Jackson has honestly created a final film that absolutely just owned me for every second it played. And in the way of the world, I'm just a very small hobbit in my own little shire of Austin... and I'm thankful for that, every day.

2. HAUNTED GOLD - I learned that my instincts on this film and this story were so exactingly perfect with the BNAT audience that there were moments of John Wayne's girlish fop punches that I thought I was going to go into convulsions from listening to the audiences actual shock at how bad a fighter John Wayne started out as. Hehehehe... FANTASTIC. By the way DUKE (John Wayne's Horse) rules the Earth and could kick Shadowfax's ass I bet!

3. THE RETURN OF CAPTAIN MARVEL - I learned that intentially using one film as a lost leader for one of the greatest films of all time should not only be done, it commands to be done. I also learned that I must find a full print of this original serial as many people wanted to see the whole serial. hehehehe... God I love BNAT-ers.

4. Buster Keaton's THE GENERAL - After screening RETURN OF THE KING - I had two major programming issues. What on earth can play after RETURN OF THE KING and not disappoint? Secondly, What could I screen for Peter Jackson, Fran Walsh and THE QUEEN OF THE GEEKS? (no other name is ever required from this point on btw and all future prints of her films will carry this title for Her name.) The idea was to reboot the audience... Take them as far cinematically speaking as humanly possible from RETURN OF THE KING. Give them a totally different perfect film experience, and THE GENERAL affords that. Guy Forsyth and his band's live music score performed live was once again genius. Over 2/3rds of the audience had never seen the film. Now they have learned how to salute an entire approaching ranks while making out with your babe! IMPORTANT LESSON!

5. King Kong drives a Volkswagon Automatic while in New York.

6. ANCHORMAN is going to be absolutely fucking hysterical. When you behold Will Ferrell's erection, you'll send off for 10 penis patches to put on your dick all at once. My god, he'd make Jenna Jameson feel like a Virgin!

7. THE BODYGUARD - Viva! Chiba! Viva! Chiba! Viva! Chiba! Viva! Chiba! Viva! Chiba! Viva! Chiba! Viva! Chiba! Viva! Chiba! Viva! Chiba! Viva! Chiba! Viva! Chiba! Viva! Chiba! Viva! Chiba! Viva! Chiba! Viva! Chiba! Viva! Chiba! Viva! Chiba! Viva! Chiba! Viva! Chiba! Viva! Chiba! Viva! Chiba! Viva! Chiba! Viva! Chiba! Viva! Chiba! Viva! Chiba! Viva! Chiba! Viva! Chiba! Viva! Chiba! Viva! Chiba! Viva! Chiba! Viva! Chiba! Viva! Chiba! Viva! Chiba! Viva! Chiba! Viva! Chiba!

8. Chan Wook Park's OLDBOY is absolutely genius. The film is one of the most thrillingly disturbing and arresting works of cinema I have ever seen and is the very best film that David Fincher has never made. The reason for that is the soul of the conflicts within the very society that makes up SOUTH KOREA and the Korean experience in general. The film is an absolute picture of how REVENGE is never a straight road. Better than any contemporary set film made anywhere in the world today.

9. SKY CAPTAIN AND THE WORLD OF TOMORROW trailer is one of the most perfect, beautiful, holy shit cool as fuck wanna see wanna see my god, let's watch that again and again and again and again things I've ever seen. Paul Dini took me aside after it played and weeped about how desperately he wanted to see that film... right now.

10. NID DE GUEPES is gorgeous on the big screen. I've seen the film perhaps 60 times on DVD - finally seeing it on the big screen with a BNAT audience proved once again, why the Drafthouse and in particular this audience is the greatest ever.

11. BLIND - that Asian actor was hot!

12. GINGER SNAPS 2 - mass female masturbation scenes are very important for the sanity of all. Does this happen? Is there somewhere where 40 young girls are lined up and asked to freely masturbate and explore the power of their own hands? Also Blondes are bad news.

13. HAUTE TENSION -- Sometimes 20 blows to a killer's head with a fence post wrapped with barbed wire... sometimes you have to go a little farther than that.

14. Watching the SKY CAPTAIN AND THE WORLD OF TOMORROW trailer again was absolutely necessary!

15. TEENAGE MOTHER - is literally the single greatest late night unsuspecting grindhouse ambush film in the history of mankind. This movie hand the audience clapping along, snapping their fingers... digging the funky cool threads, the single most amazing spasmotic dork monkey ever to be named DUKE in film history... and then had the nerve to feature a 5 minute dance number in which he figures heavily. I was laughing non-stop. The Hot Rods were awesome. Also, this film taught me that I have never been more happy and secure in my own sexual identity as a man... and will never again ponder the dreamy notion of being a pregnant woman.

16. ROTTEN FRUIT - Utterly depraved and brilliant. Perfect Breakfast Entertainment!

17. UNDEAD - The Australian Spierig Brothers' film plays fantastic late late in a run. Specifically - anything that involves MARION delights the audiences endlessly. Also when the hot babe strips to her bra & panties for a logical plot reason... well... that's just great!

18. THE PASSION OF THE CHRIST -- Never listen to a National Media coverage of alleged screenings. This film played to an audience 230 exhausted cinema loving movie worshipers from all around the world, every political and religious group... and the film received a 5 minute standing ovation and a 90 minute Q&A that included numerous questions grasping to understand what the "critics" of this film are talking about.

19. Mel Gibson -- It was stunning to do a 90 minute Q&A with Mel Gibson at the 28 hours of continual conciousness... and it seemed to go incredibly well. When he first came out he was seemingly quite nervous and visibly uncomfortable. I could see that he really had no idea what to expect from this audience in terms of "confrontations" and "feelings". Beginning with the tearful blessings and thank yous from one Houston Lady, to the applause for the sheer bravery to make non-traditional works of passion instead of just chipping away at another sequel. Well... It was gratifying. When one of Mel's associates was answering questions, watching Mel on his hands and knees autographing a couple of front row-ers' programs was... maybe the single best image I have from BNAT this year... actually... let me take that back...

Watching the look on the 11 year old girl's face who attended as she was seeing Peter Jackson and Mel Gibson in person. Watching Fran Walsh and "The Queen of the Geeks" interacting with everyone. The fear that we had killed Peter Jackson when suddenly he fell to the ground by a disguised platform of steps. I'll never forget the weight of that smoke grenade. I'll never forget hearing that SECURITY forgot their metal detecting wands. Watching an audience discover the genius of Chan Wook Park for the first time. Seeing the sheer joy on people's faces as each and every surprise hit them. Watching Eli Roth asking Mel Gibson how CABIN FEVER played business wise in Australia this past weekend, only to have Mel Gibson say, "Cabin Fever, what's that?" And the entire audience going into hysterics!

The moment where I was trying to start talking after RETURN OF THE KING and for some inexplicably emotional moment, I came very near the point of losing the ability to speak all together.

Watching 40 geeks trying their hardest to beat the living shit out of a life size papermache Harry Pinata... as the Harry Pinata took on all comers!!!

Watching TEENAGE MOTHER and sharing the experience with Tim League as we watched our cinematic terrorism come to pass, executed beyond our wildest dreams!

Watching Father Geek give out TONS OF SideShow Toys! Watching BNATERS going around getting their yearbooks signed. Watching everyone talking with others based upon finding commonalities from the yearbook. And ultimately having the coolest BNAT T-shirts ever....

Readers Talkback
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  • Dec. 8, 2003, 1:48 a.m. CST

    What!? Harry screened ROTK and the Passion this year, AND Mel Gi

    by Sith Witch

    it was just going to be a dozen cheapo drive-in flicks...I have learned my lesson, but too bad there will not be another LOTR film to expect at next year's hootenanny...

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 1:48 a.m. CST


    by Morage

    ROTK...PASSSION....SKY CAPTAIN...BNAT...I'M FIRST in the TAlkback it meant the most

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 1:52 a.m. CST

    Oh well...nevermind...

    by Morage's cool...harry's still has some connectionssssssssss...but I remember last year...when he was saying that when ROTK would come out....the LOTR trilogy would be the single BEST MOVIE EVER....not it's the best TRILOGY ever..... it's a step^back.....but it will be a hell of a movie anyhow..... I'm kinda disappointed...with Harold's ROTK first-review being so shy....when he was the most PASSIONNATE LOTR BACKER OF ALL...he even went on NZ DAMNIT !!!!!

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 1:53 a.m. CST

    Cool as hell

    by devanjedi

    Next year- I'm there. If you can pull of 10% of that...

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 2:02 a.m. CST

    2003 PASSION &ROTK.(applauds)...2004.....ghost town (boooooooos)

    by Even_Se7ven

    starring Starring Steve Buscemi as the ghost and Harold Jay Knowles as the town.... Steve's gonna fight the red-hairy devilllllllll.... BTW......ROTK's ROCKKKKKKKK

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 2:06 a.m. CST

    Dear God, had I the weekend off...

    by Dug Wells

    Harry, you rule for putting that lineup together and to all the BNATers who were there, I am eternally jealous. 8 days til Trilogy Tuesday....

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 2:14 a.m. CST

    Holy Shit! Amazing!

    by JAGUART

    I think this is the first time I've masterbated to pure text.

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 2:19 a.m. CST

    Oh My God, They Almost Killed Peter Jackson!

    by Silver Shamrock

    You Bastards!

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 2:19 a.m. CST

    BNAT OWNED ALL......

    by Jon E Cin

    Bad ass.....i only wish I were cool enough to attend.

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 2:23 a.m. CST

    MY GOD!!!

    by mag7man

    This sounds like a film lovers wet dream! I'm salivating over the thought of Ginger Snaps 2

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 2:26 a.m. CST

    You People Fucking SUCK!

    by OgieOglethorpe

    WE HATE YOU ALL! Goodnight.

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 2:26 a.m. CST

    BNAT5 & ROTK

    by Darth Thoth

    Man, I wish I was there at BNAT5. Lucky devils. Sounds like it was simply amazing. And I agree with Morage that I'm starting to get worried that ROTK won't be the greatest movie ever. I know it will still rock. And I know my expectations are probably too large. But I really need this movie to be an event like none other and while everybody is saying it's a great film, I don't see too much enthusiasm. Maybe it induces numbness rather than joy or excitement or whatever. I don't know. I'm just getting a little worried that's all. But I know the flick will still rock!

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 2:27 a.m. CST

    no. BNAT PWNED all

    by flipster

    goodnight y'all.

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 2:28 a.m. CST

    And oh yeah...

    by Darth Thoth

    The lineup for BNAT5 just rocks! Wow, talk about film bliss and an experience. Wow, you lucky people!! Good stuff Harry.

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 2:44 a.m. CST

    Okay, so Darth Thoth, you wrote...

    by Alexandra.DuPont

    "... while everybody is saying it's a great film, I don't see too much enthusiasm." Now, I DO want to point out that you wrote this in response to the following string of sentences by Harcourt Fenton Knowles: "RETURN OF THE KING is the finishing flourish on what is definitively the greatest single narrative trilogy in the history of cinema. This film gives a new meaning to scope in film. A new meaning to the term epic. Peter Jackson has honestly created a final film that absolutely just owned me for every second it played." That certainly sounds like middling enthusiasm to me. I mean, REALLY, Thoth: Maybe first you need to dial down your expectations for the REVIEWS. As Daffy Duck said in "Robin Hood Daffy": "How jolly can you get?"

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 2:56 a.m. CST

    All but Undead

    by AnwarNamtut

    I am still alive! Thanks for a killer time Harry. If you are curious who I am, I like the Easter Bunny. I'll have to tell you later why Mel Gibson dissing Eli was a moment of cosmic justice. I truly loved the lineup of films. The General rocked my nuts with the live band playing. Nid di Guepes was just the mindless shootemup the doctor ordered. Old Boy is definitely the highlight for me (besides ROTK and Peter, but I think that is a given, correct?). Undead was the low point. Just because it has zombies and aliens and is in New Zealand doesn't make it a classic film. It was a very good flick to take short naps in between clever gags though. My girlfriend flat passed out during it, and the couple we made friends with actually left the building for the second half. Maybe a re-edit would shape it up? Passion of Christ. I wanna reserve full judgement until it is finished. Many a movie has been perfected or ruined in the cutting room, plus the music is gonna have to be damned good. Amazing performances. The language thing is genius in and of itself. Christ switching from Aramaic to perfect Latin when addressing the Romans was a nice touch. Anyway, a good time was had by all, though a few too many weenies were complaining about watching so many subtitled films. Maybe you could invite them to a foreign language only BNAT next year...

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 2:58 a.m. CST


    by where_are_quints_hobbit_set_reports

    I am an AICN fan from wayback (even had my reviews pubbed here under another name) and I wanna say HAPPY GOSH DARN BIRTHDAY HARRY you deserve it man. And I have 2 black eyes and gotta take the GRE in 8 hours. But anyway sounds like it was awesome. Just FYI talkback assholes Harry is the punkrock soul of Austin TX, a town that has lost a lot of soul in the past decade.

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 3:06 a.m. CST

    Passion of Christ Advertising

    by DrunkDancingFool

    Will the Passion of Christ's advertising be aimed at movie-goers or more towards the Christian community? If this sounds obvious, think on it a moment more. Many Christians take what they have for granted. This will be a dash of cold water for them, as well as the rest of us.

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 3:11 a.m. CST


    by Darth Thoth

    I must admit that you make a good point. It's late and I'm not thinking too str8. Thanks for giving a better perspective to think from.

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 3:11 a.m. CST

    I hate Mel Gibson

    by Mr Sidney James

    As an Englishman I hate Mel Gibson. He Clearly hates the English, so I feel it it only right I should hate him. Also, I hope his new and all future films bomb. With a bit of luck and a following wind, he could be the next Kevin Kostner Thankyou for reading.

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 3:16 a.m. CST

    I think towards everyone

    by judasbooth

    I don't buy into what all of the religious groups who've seen it already are preaching about it. I don't think this is part of some secret propoganda plot that Gibson is using. I think Gibson is going to sell this as a story that everyone is already familiar with. I doubt he's going to screening trailers proclaiming 'He was betrayed by his own people' and somesuch. If he does, let the backlash flow with the blood of a thousand sinners!

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 3:17 a.m. CST

    Did anyone verbally pimp-slap PJ for choosing Naomi Watts over K

    by Cash Bailey

    If not then someone should have. Watts is very pretty and can act, but she doesn

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 3:24 a.m. CST

    Nobody asked Mel Gibson about MAD MAX 4?????

    by My Ass Smells

    You call yourself geeks? Fucking idiots! WE WANT MAD MAX FOUR!

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 3:26 a.m. CST

    Re: JudasBooth

    by DrunkDancingFool

    I agree. To say that Mr. Gibson is trying to subvert the masses is ridiculous. It would lose something if it tried to preach rather than tell a story. By concentrating solely on the story and the suffering... then it becomes something poignant without trying to convert. If indeed this is what Mr. Gibson is trying to do, then I applaud him.

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 3:50 a.m. CST

    Re: Drunkdancingfool

    by judasbooth

    Exactly so. And it looks like that is exactly what he has done with the film from the responses from BNAT 5. I mean, a standing ovation for five minutes?! Doesn't seem like it's the kind of film that's 'preachy' if it got that sort of response. Let's hope the MPAA doesn't have a field day with it, or any future editing tarnishes what was witnessed at BNAT.

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 4:22 a.m. CST

    So the mystery film

    by devanjedi

    mystery film was anchorman?

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 4:52 a.m. CST

    Hope he shows pictures of this

    by Jonn

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 5:03 a.m. CST

    All hail Phillipa Boyens, Quenn Of The Geeks.

    by raw_bean

    I want to marry that woman.

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 5:03 a.m. CST

    QUEEN, I meant.

    by raw_bean

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 5:22 a.m. CST


    by Snake-eyes

    Ok, its now the 8th of December and the embargo stopping reviews of ROTK has WHERE ARE THE REVIEWS OF ROTK on this site from Moriarty, Harry and co.????? I want a wonderfully written, spoiler-free review please!!!!!!

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 5:24 a.m. CST

    Ok im gonna use pure blind green envy profanity to anyone who we

    by TallScott

    Fuckers! All of you Pure lucky FUCKERS!...Why dont this thing go on tour? This is becomeing the geek equivlant to being ivited to the Playboy Mansion..But then agian I would blow off an ivitation to Butt Numb a thon to go to the playboy mansion..Anyhoo it sounded like a great time..BASTARDS!

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 5:35 a.m. CST

    This man has absolutely NO journalism talent at all.....

    by Alan Felix

    I seriously have no idea what was just said in this posting. Seriously, it is most akin to listening to the monologue of a schizophrenic, by the true textbook definition. What he has just said, is the most insanely idiotic thing I have ever heard. Nowhere in his rambling, incoherent speech was he anywhere near a rational thought. Everyone in talkback is now dumber from having read it. I award him no merit, and may God have mercy on his soul.

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 5:43 a.m. CST

    Mr Sidney James, Mel doesn't hate the English, go spread your id

    by villiee_marsha

    Maybe in Yahoo forums where people like you hang out, go there. Nuff said.

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 5:43 a.m. CST

    Mr Sidney James, Mel doesn't hate the English, go spread your id

    by villiee_marsha

    Maybe in Yahoo forums where people like you hang out, go there. Nuff said.

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 5:44 a.m. CST

    Gibson already made a brilliant film about a man who suffered a

    by atinyspeckofdust

    Bravheart. And unlike Jesus, at least William Wallace's story hadn't been told and retold and played out a million times over. Give us something that hasn't already been manipulated to death. Please. I'd rather see a film about Prometheus getting crucified for giving Man fire.

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 6:06 a.m. CST

    Passion of Christ......hmmm.....

    by Snake-eyes

    I'm not religious at all and I dont want to flame anyone, but I have to say that I am actually of the belief that religion is the biggest cause of misery and suffering in our history, coupled of course with man's inherent flaws of greed and jealousy!!! I just hope that the whole 'doctrine of religion' isnt forced down our throats!! I want to see a moving, epic tale! Which, if shot right has great potential. What I DONT want is a two and a half hour 'look how great religion is and how blind faith can solve all your problems in life!!!' piece of propaganda!

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 6:17 a.m. CST

    Alan Felix

    by Pandas

    Can a schizophrenic produce a monologue? Wouldn't it be a duologue or polylogue or something? Just wondering.

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 7:03 a.m. CST

    duologue? Panda...

    by devanjedi

    That's dialogue!

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 7:28 a.m. CST

    Totally Awesome!

    by JAGUART

    Maybe next you can get Ben Affleck to attend. Golly!

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 7:31 a.m. CST

    "Little Hobbit"????

    by Mars1

    If Harry is a *little hobbit* I'd sure hate to see a *big* one <G>

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 7:38 a.m. CST

    What's really funny is that people thought Mel Gibson was joking

    by Atticus Finch

    And the LOTR comment by Harry is a pretty safe one, considering LOTR is one of the only "single-narrative trilogies" there is. I mean, the first film in the Original Trilogy is self-contained. The Prequel Trilogy is single-narrative, but that has one film to go. The first film in The Shitrix trilogy is self-contained. LOTR is one of the only trilogies I can think of where no film can stand alone. Are there trilogies I am missing? Probably, but I'm sure you'll let me know. Not to say that LOTR sucks, on the contrary...I'm just dissecting Harry's boast.

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 7:50 a.m. CST

    So did Mel Gibson explain why he HATES THE JEWS!?!?!?

    by rev_skarekroe

    This film proves that Gibson is an ANTI-SEMITIC HATE-MONGER WHY DOESN'T HE JUST MAKE A FILM ABOUT HOW GRATE HITLER IS!!!!! Actually, I don't think that, but I wanted to say it before someone else does. sk

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 8:12 a.m. CST

    I have seen Mel in person while filming Signs

    by hawauer29a

    I saw him but very far. He practically turned Bucks County upside down, it looked like a political rally camping near the movie set. That prompted local newspapers to describe the Mel sightings are the greatest the town ever had since Elvis. Oh it was fun.

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 8:13 a.m. CST

    I have seen Mel in person while filming Signs

    by hawauer29a

    I saw him but very far. He practically turned Bucks County upside down, it looked like a political rally camping near the movie set. That prompted local newspapers to describe the Mel sightings are the greatest the town ever had since Elvis. Oh it was fun.

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 8:40 a.m. CST

    Atticus Finch.....I agree!

    by Snake-eyes

    I've had the same discussion with my brother recently, who is also an avid LOTR fan. We both decided that in our views, LOTR represented the best trilogy ever! But we were having trouble thinking of any single narrative trilogies out there that we could compare it with. Star Wars OT isnt, as you rightly say. The prequels will be but lets face it, they are a MASSIVE let down. Every other trilogy we thought of all had self contained first, second or third films. Even the first film in Back to the Future, despite having 'to be concluded..' wouldve been acceptable as a stand alone movie. That said, single narrative or not, I dont see a trilogy being better than LOTR, the only one to come close is SW OT or maybe Godfather but they all suffered from problems with the third film. _______ Anyway, back to your point, Harry's comment is, as you say, effectively meaningless.

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 9:03 a.m. CST

    any talk about Christ seems to cause such division

    by aeolus

    I always find it interesting that Christ seems to cause such reaction. Frankly, as a historian, I am a little concerned with the idea that you would not show a movie because it shows jews in a slightly bad light. Historical fact people -- The Jews asked the Romans to crucify Jesus, who willingly did! The Jews and the Romans were responsible. Yes, many many thousands of people, both guilty and innocent were crucified by the Romans. So what is the big deal with this one carpenter? Why should he be more important? Setting aside the answer that Christ was the Son of God because that is a Faith question, the simple carpenter's murder led to the creation of a religion that at least a billion people believe. Also, if you want to make a movie about jews that will REALLY cause problems, why not make a movie about Jericho, where they knocked the walls down and then went and slaughtered everyone in the city. Or, a movie about how they went and conquered people after people after people... Good stories from the Bible that could be movies: The Jewish woman who nailed a fleeing king's head to the floor of her tent, or the Jewish guy who killed a king so fat that his knife got swallowed up by the fat. History happened people, and it is not anti-semitic to talk about it!

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 9:22 a.m. CST

    You say Dia, I say Duo

    by Pandas

    Yeah I just thought it sounded better for comic effect! I was wrong. Badly wrong.

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 9:25 a.m. CST

    maybe Knowles meant to write:Rotk is the single greatest narrati

    by Windowlicker74

    no, that doesn t make sense either. Then i harry s still a tenth grader indeed..

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 9:35 a.m. CST

    greatest single narrative etc.

    by jonahmavesin

    I think he's referring to other types of trilogies that are explicitly NOT linking one narrative, i.e., the Red/White/Blue trilogy, etc. I would definitely list SW and Matrix etc. as single narrative. The self-containedness of the first movie in each case is a function of the circumstances of their production, not anything to do with the nature of their narrative. I read Harry's quote as placing LOTR above them.

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 9:36 a.m. CST

    RotK Discussion

    by RobReid

    OK, I'll bite. I'll give you thoughts on RotK, but with a couple of disclaimers. I'll try not to spoil anything and I have read the books. A lot. This is important not from the fanboy sense (I'll try to be objective), but from the sense that I know in advance how the story goes. There were no surprises for me. I wouldn't be as held by just the story, since I know it already. Anyway, here goes nothing. Return of the King is an epic in the grand sense. Epic vistas, epic battles and epic emotions. The battle sequeneces in The Two Towers pale in comparison to the huge battle that occurs outside the gates of Minas Tirith. But the movie doesn't just rely on its own vastness to hold you. The interactions of Sam, Frodo and Gollum are as well done on a relational level as the battles are on a grandiose level. You get a sense of the extreme lure of the ring from the very first scene, a flashback of how Gollum came by the ring. This desire is the thread that holds together the interactions of Frodo, Sam and Gollum throughout. There are holes in the characters. You never really understand the root cause of Denethor's madness. Elrond still comes across vaguely whiny. These are small gripes, really, and I noticed them due to my familarity with the books. I do not know how a non-Tolkien geek would respond to these. All things considered, this is a great film. The best word to describe it is awe. It is so large, you can't help but admire it. You will probably also love the movie. And, of course, the battles.

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 9:54 a.m. CST


    by Snake-eyes

    I think youre probably right there when you say that Harry is placing the LOTR trilogy above all others. Which is great to hear from my point of view. I also agree that certainly with Star Wars, that the self-containedness of the first movie was due to Lucas not knowing if it would be successful enough to warrant the sequels. But I dont think that was the case with the Matrix. I believe then they were simply milking the poor cash cow with their sequels. Actually I also think Lucas is kinda doing that with his prequels, given how lame and lacklustre they are. He definately hasnt that spark he had with the OT. He should take a gander at Jackson's passion, desire and enthusiasm and see through him how he used to be once...long ago....before he lost the plot. Actually, I think a lot of directors would do well to do the same!

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 10:06 a.m. CST

    Thank Yous

    by Darth Thoth

    Thank you Snake-Eyes for requesting some spoiler free ROTK reviews. I feel you 100%. And thank you RobReid for providing one. I really need this movie to rock. RobReid, if you are still there, how does ROTK as a film, compare to say FOTR, TTT, and other movies? What do you compare it too? I hate to "rate/ rank" films but how does it stack up? Thanks.

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 10:06 a.m. CST


    by Rosie_Cotton

    Er, what kind of a historian are you? According the BIBLE, yes, the Jews asked for the crucifixion of Jesus. But the Bible is not a historical document, anymore than the Iliad is a historical rendering of the battle of Troy and or the Vinland Sagas are accurate historical depictions of the Vikings discovering North America. It's heavily edited narrative, most of which was written to with the purpose of converting Roman citizens (which would be a VERY good reason to transfer the blame of Jesus' death from the Romans, who are the ones who did it, to the Jews, whom the Romans hated). The fact is we don't know who did what or how it happened. **** That being said, I am very interested in seeing "The Passion". I was very leery at it at first (though I planned to see it anyway), simple because I take these matters so seriously and I don't want to see some ham-fisted fanatic bashing around these matters (more than has been done anyway). But if anyone could alter my expectations, it's Harry Knowles. You've bowled me over, Harry. I may not like this movie anyway, but I am definitely less guarded about seeing it than before.

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 10:13 a.m. CST

    don't waste your breath aeolus

    by HeavenBoy

    I tried to explain this the last time there was a talkback about the Passion....... Mel Gibson is getting bashed by the Jews because he is telling the truth about the Jews. They'd prefer that he didn't make a movie that had the truth about what they did to Jesus, because obviously that truth puts them in a bad light. Mel Gibson is one of the few people brave enough to just stand up and say "this is in the Bible"..... the Jews of course don't care because they reject Jesus and have turned their backs on God anyway (they of course did this before they killed His Son, so it was nothing new for them anyway)...... but the end result is that they don't want people to see this movie because they've been working behind the scenes with everything they have control over to try and get people to forget their role in killing Jesus. I am really glad though that this movie IS being made and Mel Gibson isn't compromising the truth..... I can't tell you how heartening it is to read how so many different people (even some Jews apparently) who are seeing this movie and really understanding what Jesus went through for all of us, and the depths of His love for all humanity. Hearing about how this is getting standing ovations is really fantastic, and I'm glad people are getting to see a real version of the final hours of Jesus' life and the real story about what the Jews did. I can't wait for more people to see this and to see for themselves the extent of the brutality and the extent of how the Jews treated Jesus...... it's a beautiful story, and any way that gets people to see what is really in the Bible and what Jesus really went through is a great thing.

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 10:21 a.m. CST

    Happy Birthday, Harry! Now, about those 'Quint On-Set' Reports

    by Miami Mofo

    Considering that the LotR publicity black-out has been lifted can we now read Quint's on-set reports? Please. ***Also, congratulations on what must have been a fantastic BNAT!

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 10:24 a.m. CST

    Goals for next year

    by Garbageman33

    With continued hard work, I'm thinking that BNAT could become the GEN-CON of the 21st century. Whether or not you think that's a good thing probably depends on how often you get out of your parent's basement.

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 10:33 a.m. CST

    More on RotK

    by RobReid

    It is difficult for me to compare this to other movies. As I said, this is not because I'm a huge Tolkien fan, but because I knew the story before I went in. This lessened the emotional impact for me, because there were no doubts and no "twists" for me. However, be that as it may and as long as you take this with the grain of salt, then I will proceed. (Am I great at covering my butt, or what?) :) I actually liked RotK better than the first two movies. It was both LARGE and still managed to keep the interactions between the characters intact. The first two movies developed the characters and this one filled them out. The movie works because the source material works. Tolkien's material has been around and has stood the test of time. Peter Jackson took great source material and did a wonderful job transferring it to the screen. To compare it to another final movie in a "Good vs. Evil" trilogy, we can look briefly as "Return of the Jedi." (No flames, please. The comparison is valid and easy to make. I'm lazy, so sue me.) Jedi had unknown source material. RotK doesn't feel the need to put in the cutsie Ewoks. The character development in RotK doesn't revolve around a bad love triangle story. Even RotK's languages were created by a man who spent a great deal of time studying languages. OK, so it's better than a Star Wars flick? So what? My point is that it is SO MUCH better than that. It will stand up, just as Tolkien has stood up. And if someone could please describe what a "spoiler" is for this movie, I could do a much better job... :)

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 10:38 a.m. CST

    HeavenBoy, you aren't a Christian.

    by Rosie_Cotton

    You are everything that is the antithesis of Christ. Seriously, I would piss on you if I met you on the street, and I don't doubt if you'd expressed those kinds of views two thousands years ago to Christ himself, he would have done the same.

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 10:48 a.m. CST

    rosie -cotton

    by aeolus

    Hello! The Dead Sea Scrolls conclusively proved that the Bible we have today is the same Bible from the beginning -- unaltered by the course of time. There is more valid proof on the Biblical recounting of the life of Christ than any other historical figure of antiquity. Four eye-witness accounts, the countless writings of others right after, the writings of the Jew Josephus and much much more. Everything you and I know about Ceasar Augustus and accept as fact is from less sources, and yet we believe it. But, looking at Revolutions (which is a way to characterize early Christianity), there has never been a revolution based on myth ... Luther and Calvin were real men and they sparked a European Revolution. Mohammed was a real man and sparked an Islamic one.

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 10:49 a.m. CST

    Excuse me Rosie Cotton....

    by HeavenBoy

    but how is it any of your business to tell me what I am and am not? I have no idea why you would insult me like that (and telling me I'm not a Christian is about the greatest insult I can think of..... well, there is one more, but I won't even think of that). I'm sorry if you have a problem with my beliefs, but I know what I have learned from the Bible and what I hear in Church. And don't get me wrong, the Jews were forgiven by Jesus...... at least for what they did to Him. And Jesus even forgives them for the attempts to distort the truth and control what people know and believe about what really happened. But it doesn't mean they shouldn't be called on their attempts to censor and alter the content of this movie simply because it shows the true story and the true behavior of the Jews and the true suffering of Jesus. They don't WANT people to see it, because the true history makes them look bad. I mean, I probably can't blame them for feeling that way, if I were them I'd probably not want people to see it either (just as if I were someone who murdered someone on camera, I wouldn't want anyone else to see that videotape or hear any witnesses).

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 10:56 a.m. CST

    again aeolus, you're wasting your breath

    by HeavenBoy

    In case it isn't clear already, a lot of people don't care about the truth or don't want to know about the truth. And those that do know the truth want it hidden and not talked about...... certain people have turned their backs on Jesus, and there just isn't anything that can be done about it. But this is a movie that is clearly so powerful and so expertly crafted that people understand clearly what this story is..... I haven't even seen it yet, beyond the trailer, but I can't wait to finally get a chance to see it in person. And in the meantime, it's great to see it getting the kind of recognition and response it is. But again, there will always be people who will deny the Word of God, and who will spout junk like Jesus not being a real person, not being the Son of God, not having died for all of us, etc. And there will be people who continue to try and press their agenda that denies historical truth in favor of something that is more comfortable for the Jews. I mean, there's a really good reason Mel Gibson had to make this movie by himself...... there surely was no way he could get it made in Hollywood, and I just hope that he stays strong and knows people out there do support what he has done and his courage in standing up to those people who would try and tell him not to tell the truth or make an accurate portrayal of the betrayal of the Jews.

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 11:11 a.m. CST

    hey, why not?

    by aeolus

    I wonder if it would be worthwhile to try and find some Christian imagery in lotr? Just some obvious examples: Gandalf passes through death and comes back Aragorn "returns" as King and claims His bride Frodo is bearing his cross which Sam carries for awhile Gollum is redeemed Any others?

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 11:17 a.m. CST


    by Darth Thoth

    Hey thanks a lot for the RotK stuff! I/ we really appreciate it. You're the best. Have a great day buddy. Peace.

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 11:22 a.m. CST

    how many movies can be THE GREATEST OF ALL TIME

    by Tigernan

    Pull back on the hyperbole a bit, because it loses credibility after awhile. What I've gotten from this site is that every movie you've ever seen is somehow simultaneously the greatest movie/director/actor/performance you've ever seen. Get a Thesaurus.

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 11:33 a.m. CST


    by 007-11

    DAMN ME!!!

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 11:35 a.m. CST


    by Snake-eyes

    I have avoided getting involved in this pointless debate (one will never convince the other...therefore its pointless!) But I do take offence to what you just said....."But again, there will always be people who will deny the Word of God, and who will spout junk like Jesus not being a real person, not being the Son of God, not having died for all of us, etc." ....I dont believe in God or religion for MANY reasons, all of them rationally and carefully thought out -which I wont bore you all with now. But the "spouting junk" remark has really riled me!!!! You imply that non-believers "spout junk"! It might be "junk" in your eyes, but not mine. I could say all you believe in is "junk" in that respect! I believe one thing, you believe another, but your sweeping generalistion that states that I am in some way less enlightened than you yet have no more in the way of FACTS, ANSWERS and TRUTHS than I do -maybe even less so considering the "junk" I believe in HASN'T been directly responsible for the deaths of countless thousands of innocents throughout our history. Sorry, but I had to get that off my chest.

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 11:36 a.m. CST

    I really shouldn't but...

    by Sheik Yerbouti

    HeavenBoy you need to calm down, you won't win any here with what you say, but you will continue to further the stereotype of ignorant abrasive Christians who don't practice what they preach. Remember Paul's most important letters on love "If I speak truth but have not love in my heart I am a resounding gong". Don't give foder to more Christian hating geeks, you won't change anyone, but right now you have an oppurtunity to change your own heart.

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 11:48 a.m. CST

    So, no SPIDEY 2 trailer with the ROTK screening?

    by Blanket-Man

    Just askin'...

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 11:51 a.m. CST

    you're right

    by HeavenBoy

    I don't think I need my heart to change, and I'm not the one who is bashing Mel Gibson for making a movie about Jesus. But you are right that I am not likely to change anyone's minds..... of course, I'm not really looking to either. Snake-eye's post is pretty much what I would expect. Anyway, I still love the Jews and I love people who don't accept Jesus. It is because of this love that I do wish they would accept God's Word, or at least perhaps try and listen to it. I'm hoping at the very least people will go into this movie with an open mind, and maybe visually seeing it will have an effect that someone like me can't have. I will definitely admit that I am not skilled when it comes to trying to get someone to understand the Word of God, and I really leave that up to others who are more talented and eloquent. Again, that is why I am glad Mel Gibson is making this movie. If people want to see me as hateful or someone who should just shut up, that is fine.... I didn't mean to upset or bother anyone. But I do realize that this is subject matter that does bother people, especially people who don't believe. Anyway, I won't say any more....... I am sorry if anything I've said has bothered you, and I'm especially sorry if anything I have said has upset you to the point that you won't still consider letting Jesus into your life at some point. Thank you, and I apologize again.

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 11:52 a.m. CST

    RotK is not the GREATEST FILM OF ALL TIME"?!?!?!? Kill me now!

    by Damitol

    I have to laugh at a couple of talkbacks that seem disappointed that Harry didn't name Return of the King at the "the greatest film of all time

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 12:01 p.m. CST

    No Worries HeavenBoy

    by Sheik Yerbouti

    Don't be too hard on yourself, just wanted to keep you in check because I do understand your heart and your passion. The problem is, I can tell you have some education in apologetics and historical biblical studies, but you know as well as I do that even scholars reject the overwhelming evidence that exists for those who want to do the research. The problem is just when you bring the discussions to a forum such as this you have relatively few talkbackers with real research behind their comments. So it can be a fruitless exercise. Just didn't want to have you spinning your wheels with people when it is often ignorance. I mean c'mon, I have gotten so frustrated on this site for a myriad of topics at the lack of educated posts that can be really inflamatory. But its Monday and not a time to start off on a bad note, to all go with peace.

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 12:05 p.m. CST


    by Darth Thoth

    I'm definitely one of the people you were talking about expressing disappointment nobody has named RotK the "Greatest Movie Ever." I'm most certainly looking forward to this movie unlike any other film in a long time. My anticipation is huge. But I think you make a good point. There will never be a "Greatest Movie Ever." People are different. That's what makes the world beautiful. That is what makes movies beautiful. What I may think is the greatest flick ever my brother may disagree on. You see what I'm saying. So I guess I need to take whatever I hear about RotK for whatever it's worth and then go see it for myself and draw my own conclusion. I guess it didn't take a genious to figure this out but you know how it is when your emotions are clouded. I loved FOTR and TTT so I've kind've lost myself. But good looks on bringing me back to reality. Another talk backer did the same thing last night. One.

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 12:07 p.m. CST

    Nide de Guepes

    by PGee

    Yeah, 60 times ...sure ! That means 100 hrs. ! Man I liked that movie a lot, but you really need to find a Job dude !

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 12:07 p.m. CST

    HeavenBoy....fair comment

    by Snake-eyes

    Thats fair enough. Believe me I know how easy it is to get into an arguement over religion. Its something I always try to avoid cos generally there's never a favourable outcome. Lets just hope the film will please us both, for whatever we want to get out of it. Oh and ROTK WILL RULE!!!!

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 12:09 p.m. CST

    That's amazing, Harry!!

    by viola123

    I'm just in awe of this. Thanks so much, your list is jealous-inducing, and Mel sounds so wonderful. I knew he'd be nervous, and how lovely that you all gave him and his film such a reception. It really makes me feel like crying, and I know that is sappy for this crowd, but I can't help it. And then you say that you all saw the trailer for "The World of Tomorrow"?! That made my heart beat so fast. I can't believe you got to see that, and *sigh*, is there any way for you to share this with us? Jude. Mel Gibson. Jude!! This is really too much. :)

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 12:12 p.m. CST

    A Harry Pinata? That must have been huge.

    by Big Bad Clone

    Yeah that's a lame joke but I'm still fucking jealous.

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 12:19 p.m. CST

    Thank you, Damitol

    by MercilessMing

    You eloquently provided the answer to both of the conversations in this talkback. Your comments on ROTK as the best movie ever are easily transferable to this inane and repetitive religious debate as well.

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 12:25 p.m. CST

    ...sounds like you had a decent time

    by drjones

    ohmmmyyyYYYYGGGODDD! i was not fucking there!!!! i feel very sorry for myself.... HARRY!!!! you have to keep bnat up! at least the next 3 years!! otherwise i`ll never even likely get the opportunity to head over to austin texas usa...or to even apply for the tickets... aaargh!! it`s nice that you guys had such fun!!

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 1:29 p.m. CST

    It's pretty obvious by now....

    by the flashlight

    ...that there's been some kind of falling out between Harry/AICN and the Peter Jackson camp. We're, what...a week and a half away from the film opening, the reviews are now pouring in, including Time magazine, and yet there's 5 front page stories about The Passion of the Christ??? Especially in light of this site's previous orgy of coverage for the first two films. I have some Cool News of my own for ya Harry - I don't come to your site to read news about films depicting an ancient, fictional religious fable that has been used down through the years to justify every kind of atrocity known to man, filmed by a notorious homophobe who thought it was funny to toss one gay man out a castle window, and depict another as a stereotypical feminine fop in Braveheart. If I want to hear news about that kind of shit, I'll watch the fucking 700 Club. First Star Wars banning your people from the ranch, now LOTR. You guys really now how to wear out your welcome among filmmakers.

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 2:10 p.m. CST

    One More RotK Review

    by RobReid

    For those interested, I did more of a spoiler-type discussion of the movie here. As for the current discussion about "The Passion", I wasn't feeling well, so I left BNAT at about midnight, so I didn't get to see it.

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 4:08 p.m. CST

    Harry fellates anti-Semite and fag-basher Melvin Gibson

    by heywood jablomie

    ....all the while popping a rod over being THIS FUCKING CLOSE, oh my GOD, to the star of BIRD ON A WIRE. Doyyyyy! Schwinnnnng! Splortch!

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 5:04 p.m. CST

    Ya know metaphorical Harry get accused of having so much more se

    by Big Bad Clone

    I bet Harry only fellates half the people he's been linked to.

  • Dec. 8, 2003, 6:26 p.m. CST

    Ignorant McNuggets

    by Anita Hummer

    Gentlemen...Please continue to express your beliefs and opinions on this and any other forum. It is only by shining a light on the underbelly of religious zealotry such as yours that we can understand how you people think. I'll tell you what. You write off that whole Jews Killed Christ obsession and I will write off the whole Spanish Inquisition thing.

  • Dec. 9, 2003, 1:14 a.m. CST


    by T-Pot25

    Yes, yes I was at BNAT 5, who wants to touch me? I said who wants to fuckin' touch me! ROTK may be the single coolest thing I have ever fucking seen in my life. I'm envious of those who haven't seen it yet, for you are about to experience sheer cinematic bliss for the first time. Never has a movie owned an audience like this one owned our sorry asses. Oh and, Old Boy: See it! Passion: Not anti-semetic, just genius. Harry: A fuckin' asshole for showing that birthing scene. So very wrong.

  • Dec. 9, 2003, 6:14 a.m. CST

    Godfather 3 may suck, but I think it's safe to say that 1 & 2 wi

    by BarrelRider

    LOTR will end up as one of those shows which cash-strapped networks put on as Christmas programming [in about Christmas 2055], and kids watch it but they secretly giggle about how shit FX were in Granpa's day. The Godfather Trilogy, mainly the first two films, will outlive LOTR by centuries.

  • Dec. 9, 2003, 2:12 p.m. CST

    David Fincher?

    by hippolyta

    What part did David Fincher have in the making of OLDBOY? I don't remember Harry mentioning it and can't find the correlation on imdb.

  • Dec. 9, 2003, 2:17 p.m. CST


    by stuntrocker

    perceives. 1 a : to attain awareness or understanding of b : to regard as being such <perceived threats> <was perceived as a loser> 2 : to become aware of through the senses; especially : SEE, OBSERVE

  • Dec. 9, 2003, 2:39 p.m. CST

    So how long before...

    by KryptonsLastSon

    Idiots start trying to piece together which movies were shown at this BNAT? Every year the people who went will give up some of the goods, but not all. Acting like spoiled little brats with a new videogame they don't want others to play with. Can't wait to see that start this year. Well its all part of the Cult of Harry mentality around here....

  • Dec. 10, 2003, 3:02 p.m. CST

    BNAT 5 ROCKED, but......

    by samuri999

    Harry, thanks for another memorable experience that had my friends in tears because the could not attend. If this is truly the last bnat EVER, it is indeed bittersweet. If not, then the only suggestion I have for next year is take it easy on the subtitles. Not to knock foreign films, but at the wee hours in the morning, movie after movie with subtitles is hard on the eyes. And not to contradict myself, but where was the kung-fu this time? Definetly needed, like a shot of red-bull.