Hi, everyone. "Moriarty" here with some Rumblings From The Lab...
I’ve got two days worth of column here in one fell swoop. Enjoy.
TUESDAY
Okay, so I’m not exactly petite.
Maybe that’s what makes the sight of me dancing around the apartment so disconcerting. I don’t care, though. It’s Tuesday, and I got new DVDs.
First and foremost, I got SOAP. Susan Harris created one of television’s great comedies when she decided to write a show that was a wicked send-up of soap operas, but which also managed to comment on the changing social scene of the ‘70s with a scalpel-like precision. The show was always anchored, in my opinion, by two great performances, the very model of what great TV acting should be. Richard Mulligan never got the respect he deserved. No matter how much success he had, it was never enough. Burt Campbell is one of my favorite things, a simple and pure pleasure, a decent guy driven barking mad by a herd of loonies he inherited only because of the woman he loves. Katherine Helmond is equally touched by the divine as Jessica Tate, wife to Chester (Robert Mandan), a pathetic snivelling cheater who ignores her utterly. Jessica is matriarch to the very screwed up Corrine (Diana Canova), Eunice (Jennifer Salt), and Billy (Jimmy Baio). Her sister Mary (Cathryn Damon) is Burt’s wife, and she’s raising two sons from her previous marriage, Jodie (Billy Crystal) and Danny (Ted Wass). Jodie’s gay, Danny works for the mob, and Burt killed Mary’s first husband. He’s got two sons of his own that he hasn’t seen in years. One is a lunatic with a dummy attached, Chuck (Jay Johnson), and the other is Peter (Robert Urich), a local tennis pro who is sleeping with both Jessica and Corrine.
And that’s just where the show starts. The joy of the series is watching how gleefully the show embraces and then destroys soap opera convention. Over the space of those first twenty-five episodes, a ridiculous amount of ground is covered. Someone dies, someone goes crazy, there’s an absurdist murder trial, and people both keep and tell secrets with wild abandon. Somehow, the mechanics of it all never overwhelm the simple pleasure of watching this outstanding cast dance around each other. Ted Wass and Richard Mulligan have a great rapport as performers, and the way their particular relationship develops is hilarious. There are endless opportunities to relish Robert Guillaume as Benson, the housekeeper for the Tates, as he takes great delight in torturing Chester whenever possible. The Major is always fun to see turn up, and no matter what, Helmond’s blissful ignorance about the dark and miserable side of life is a lesson in optimism.
I’ve only seen three episodes since buying the disc, but as soon as the moment presents itself, I’ll down the whole thing in one gulp. I guess I’d come across as ungrateful if I complained about the woeful lack of extras on the discs. I mean, I’m just damn delighted to have all the first season episodes collected, looking and sounding about as good as can be expected from a shot-on-video ‘70’s sitcom. But right now, when so many of the principle people responsible for the show are still alive, why not shoot some interviews or, god forbid, record some commentaries? Barring that sort of effort, do you think maybe you could at least have provided some subtitles and captions? That’s about as bare bones a request as I know how to make.
Actually, allow me to digress for a moment. What’s the goddamn problem with putting subtitles on DVDs? For a large part of the audience, they make the difference between being able to enjoy a movie or not being able to understand it at all. As I’ve said before, my girl is from Argentina, and she speaks great English. Still, she likes being able to put on the Spanish subtitles while we watch a film just in case there’s a word she doesn’t know or she doesn’t understand something in context. For her, it’s a convenience. For her mother, it’s a requirement. She’s still new to America, and her English is about as good as my Spanish. We love having her over for movies, but if something isn’t subtitled, she can’t really understand. The thing that makes me most crazy is the random nature of it. Some films have them, some films don’t, and it’s not even a company-by-company thing. It appears to be title-by-title. Latinos are the largest minority is the US now. That’s a huge market that studios routinely ignore, and I guess, more than anything, it baffles me.
Next up was THE APPLE DUMPLING GANG. Yeah, that’s right. Like I said, we watched all those Don Knotts films that Universal released recently, and there wasn’t a single commentary on any of them. My co-writer noticed that the new Disney release of GANG had a track with Don Knotts and Tim Conway together, and he figured it would be fun. Wasn’t, but it was worth the try. It’s a painfully dull commentary that consists largely of Conway describing what’s happening onscreen. As a DVD producer, if you’re going to take the time to put together a track like this, realize that not everyone is going to be a natural at it. Think of that unintentionally hilarious commentary on the CONAN THE BARBARIAN DVD, where Arnold “I Wahnt To Be Guhvuhnuh” Schwarzeneggar sounds befuddled not only by the purpose of the commentary, but by the film itself, like he’d never seen a frame of it before. Some of these people need coaching. A great commentary track should enrich the experience of watching the movie, or our understanding of it. Anecdotes about the making of the film, the way key creative decisions were made... these are the things that really make it worth switching over to that alternate track. I will say this for Disney. They go above and beyond. I like their habit of including cartoons and short films that are thematically related to the feature on the discs now. There are also great segments from their TV shows that they can include, like a feature about the backlot that APPLE DUMPLING GANG was shot on. They can really fill out a title like this one or the WITCH MOUNTAIN films from a few weeks back. Their sticker price is a little high, but the sound and picture is always impressive. Sometime this weekend, I look forward to opening SLEEPING BEAUTY and giving it a peek.
Another episode of ALIAS was next, and then we put on the Anchor Bay edition of Dario Argento’s INFERNO, which I just picked up used. This semi-sequel to SUSPIRIA is stunningly beautiful, with a demanding color palette that really put my TV to the test. It’s reproduced with great clarity and almost no discernible picture bleed, an impressive feat. Argento’s films are an aural assault, and it’s a pleasure to turn this disc up. The mix of the Keith Emerson score is rich and crystal clear, and I have no doubt my neighbors got their fill of INFERNO today. The film doesn’t make a lick of literal sense, something about Death and architecture and the Three Mothers, but Argento’s best work doesn’t depend on narrative coherence. He plunges you into a nightmare world and it’s up to you to make sense of it. The underwater room, death by cat or rat, the guy in the basement with the creepy arm, those yellow eyes peeking in the door... there are plenty of images from INFERNO that stick with you, and it’s one of those titles I’m glad I finally added to the collection. There’s a good, if brief, interview with Argento on the disc, and Anchor Bay deserves special praise for what a great job they did mastering the disc on the whole.
Tuesday ended early and unexpectedly for me, before I got a chance to put this column together, but sometimes, sleep catches up, and there just ain’t no arguing with it...
WEDNESDAY
... and besides, it gave me plenty of energy so that on Wednesday, I hit the ground running. A few more episodes of SOAP and the last two unviewed episodes of FAMILY GUY from Disc Three of Volume Two got the day off to a good start.
The first feature we put on was CONFIDENCE, which Lions Gate just released on Tuesday. I didn’t see the film in theaters. I’m actually allergic to Ed Burns, so normally I’d do myself blunt object trauma before sitting through one of his films. He didn’t write or direct this one, though, which gave me some reason to hope it might not be horrible. I like James Foley when he’s got the right material. AFTER DARK MY SWEET and GLENGARRY GLEN ROSS make him worth paying attention to, even if those were all he’d ever done. I’d heard mixed reactions to this one, but found it for such a good price used that I went ahead and picked it up, sight unseen.
By now, the con game film is very familiar. We know that we’re going to get a lot of slang about grifters and shills and marks and the like. We know what whatever scam we’re watching unfold on camera, there’s going to be some other scam going on that we’ll only fully figure out at the end of the movie. The fun of watching someone get it right lies in the strength of the characters and the ease with which they handle the mechanics of the thing. It’s great fun watching some sucker get took, especially when they deserve it. Ed Burns is, to my great surprise, pretty good in the film. He’s got an oiled smarm that works well for the role. I still want to push his face in, like always, but it works for the character. Paul Giamatti is very good in his supporting role, and Rachel Weisz seems to be having more fun than usual, all boobs and flirt and pouty looks as she plays bait for the scheme. Donal Logue, Andy Garcia, and Luis Guzman all have great fun as scuzzy members of of various law enforcement agencies, all with their hands out, while Dustin Hoffman brings his A-game to his role as “The King,” a hyperactive runt with just enough money and muscle to make him dangerous. It’s very good work, a reminder of just what Hoffman is capable of summoning.
Excellent sound and picture make up for an otherwise lackluster package, and in the end, it was a lot better than I expected. I always love being surprised.
Another ALIAS next. Three discs out of the six done now. I wish Season Two was going to be out before Season Three begins, but I guess I’ll just wait and catch up with the whole series next summer.
After all the kicking and screaming I’ve heard about Universal’s new 2-disc version of MONTY PYTHON’S THE MEANING OF LIFE, I decided to finally check it out for myself. I bought it a few weeks back, but never got around to opening it. I’ve got a Sony NS715P progressive scan player, one of the ones supposedly affected by Universal’s “cutting-edge technology,” but I’ll be honest... I didn’t see anything wrong with the transfer. I was looking, too. Overall, I thought the film looked about as good as it can. The print is thrashed in places, but I’m willing to bet there’s nothing that can be done about it. Having now see the “director’s cut” once, I doubt I’ll watch it again. The new footage didn’t really add anything, and in most cases, it slowed the film down. I love this movie, uneven as it is, and all of the Pythons get their moments to shine. The extras are all fittingly silly on the second disc, but here’s where the mastering issues kicked in for me. The disc was enormously temperamental, almost determined not to work. If you’ve personally had trouble with the disc, do me a favor... drop me an e-mail detailing your trouble. I’ll continue to follow up on this in the days and weeks ahead.
Wednesday night, I was looking forward to relaxing with PRIZZI’S HONOR, an old fave that MGM just issued this week. It’s just wrapping up now as I write this, and I’m so irritated that I can barely look at the screen. I feel like I just got mugged. Let me be quite clear about this: do not buy this title. The disc is a piece of shit. It’s a non-anamorphic transfer (frankly, unforgivable at this point in the game), and there are snowstorms of pixilation that mar the image anytime there’s any degree of black onscreen. I know this wasn’t a particularly big-budget film, but it had to look better than this. The image is soft, grainy, and considering how there’s nothing else gobbling up storage space on the disc, you’d think they could manage a better job than this overcompressed mess of digital noise. This is an entirely substandard release, and it kills me. The film itself has aged pretty well. Even on the other side of all sorts of high profile mob comedies and such memorable work as GOOD FELLAS and THE SOPRANOS, this is still one of the best looks at how honor and codes of conduct can tie people in knots. I love Jack Nicholson as Charlie Partanna, one of the few genuinely dumb louts he’s ever played. Oh, sure, Charlie’s got a natural survivor’s instinct, but he’s thick, easily manipulated. Enter Irene. Kathleen Turner was on a roll when she made this one, and she’s great as the mystery woman who sweeps Charlie off his feet. The film belongs to Anjelica Huston, though, as Mae Rose, one of the great passive-aggressive monsters in film history. By the time we get to her final sunny “Holy cow,” she’s proven herself to be the real black heart of the Prizzi family. Too bad such a gem had to suffer such an undignified fate on DVD. It’s like someone at MGM just wiped their ass with the movie and stuck it in a keepcase. Thanks, guys. Again... my strongest warning to anyone considering the purchase. Don’t. You’ll be sorry.
Originally, I was going to go to bed after PRIZZI’S HONOR, but it irritated me so much that I wanted to watch something that would put me in a better mood.
Did I mention that I got a little SOUP to go with my SOAP this week? CAT SOUP, to be precise. Central Park Media has finally released NEKOJIRU-SO, my favorite film of 2001, on DVD here in Region 1. Hallelujah. I don’t hate the new title for it. It’s fitting, based on one memorable sequence, but I wish the original Japanese language title was on the packaging somewhere just so people know what it is.
I’m not the world’s biggest anime fan. I have very specific tastes. ADV Films has always been great about sending stuff to look at, and I’m willing to try almost anything. Most of it just strikes me as being overly familiar. Most original TV animation here is the same way, so it’s certainly not a problem unique to anime. Whatever CAT SOUP is, it’s not familiar. It’s beautiful, lyrical, dark and disturbing, like a dream you only half-remember when you wake.
The transfer for the 32 minute film is outstanding. I think it’s deceptively simple in terms of design, but the more you pay attention to all the details of the piece, the more impressive it becomes. You can see the influences of Dali and Magritte right alongside homages to HELLO KITTY in this film. Hats off to the extras, too. Here’s a title that almost no one in this country cares about, and DVD producer Stephanie Shalofsky still goes the extra mile, doing both a video interview and an audio commentary with director Tatsuo Sato.
There was so much urban myth around this film when I first saw it, and so little has been written about Nekojiru in English, that this really is my first concrete information on the development of the film and the manga it’s based on. I loved the interview and found it both informative and entertaining, and I would have gladly watched more of it.
If you have even a casual interest in animation, seek this out. It’s one of the coolest DVDs I’ve purchased in a hell of a long time, and well worth your effort.
BROWSING
It’s all about The Digital Bits today. They’re the ones that ran the newest rumor about the possible release of STAR WARS on DVD. I’ve heard vague rumblings about a Fall 2004 release for the SPECIAL EDITIONS as well, and it would make perfect sense in terms of marketing for Lucasfilm. I wouldn’t be at all surprised if this turns out to be accurate, and if it does happen, expect this to be the last time you see the Special Editions that we saw in theaters in 1997. After this, Lucas will replace them with the Ultimate Editions that he’s been working on for a while now, versions of the films that will attempt to bring the entire six movies together under one visual umbrella, so to speak.
Fox appears to be sending out confirmation about both BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER SEASON FIVE (I can’t wait... Herc tells me he’s got a free copy of SEASON FOUR waiting for me the next time I see him) and FIREFLY: THE COMPLETE SERIES. Both titles drop on December 9th, and you can find details at DVD File, along with word of when AMERICAN WEDDING is headed home.
And have you poked around TV Shows On DVD at all? You should. It’s fun.
That’s all for this morning. I’ll catch you bright and early tomorrow, and until then, here’s a Question For Discussion for you: if you could have a commentary track for any film or TV show with any participants, living or dead, what film would it be and who would be on it?
While I dream of my ENTER THE DRAGON with Bruce Lee commentary, you guys hit me with some answers, and I’ll see you back here tomorrow.
"Moriarty" out.
