MATCHSTICK MEN is one of the most frustrating film experiences I’ve had in quite some time. You see… I absolutely love a great deal of this movie. Nicolas Cage, Sam Rockwell and Alison Lohman were perfect. The story was fantastic. The end was perfect and I was dazzled. THEN… Then after making a really great movie, Ridley Scott does something… so mind-numbingly daft that I wanted to start screaming at the screen.

It’s a little unnecessary epilogue. Something that belongs on the DVD as a bad idea we left out of our movie. It begins with the title card… ONE YEAR LATER… My suggestion for you is to take a little minidisk player or Ipod or whatever your personal portable music device of choice is… time out a 10 minute section of music that you enjoy… When you see ONE YEAR LATER appear on screen, put on the headphones… press play and SHUT YOUR EYES. When the 10 minutes are up open them, you’ll be seeing the end credits playing and you will have had a damn good time at the movies without many, if any, problems. You’ll be amused by all the people around you that look pissed, aggravated and perturbed.

You may even be curious as to what happened in those 10 minutes, but that’s ok… I’ve got ya covered. I’ll go into spoiler mode a bit later in this review – since I really have NO PROBLEMS with this movie at all, until it decides to kill itself in the epilogue.

To give you an idea of what this film is… essentially it is a story about a phobic con artist and his partner (protégé) pulling cons on unsuspecting fools. The phobic one is living a bare life, filled with paralytic psychological issues which keep him from being able to function well in the world, so he has isolated himself completely. He ends up seeing a psychiatrist, who brings out issues in his life he needs to deal with, mainly the question about his daughter/son… Long story short, Nicolas Cage is reunited with his daughter, falls in love with being a Dad – begins to feel better about himself, invites her into his lifestyle and suddenly… the world becomes dangerous, because for the first time, he really has something to lose.

Cage’s Roy is exactly the sort of character that on a great day you want to see Nicolas playing. He’s a mason jar of neurotic quirks. A neat freak at a level of absurdity. It is funny, till it is sad. His character is racked with pathos. He’s likable, but he cheats people, thus being loathsome. He feels and manifests guilt upon himself, giving himself mental lashings that he isn’t even aware of doing. Watching how Nicolas is with his little girl, Angela… you can’t help, but love his character all the more. It is… fantastic.

Alison Lohman is a wonder. She was really good in WHITE OLEANDER, but I never really cared that much for her in that film, cuz she was so “messed up” as was necessary in that film, that in many ways, I had trouble associating with her character. Here… In MATCHSTICK MEN – she’s playing the child of divorce meeting the father she always dreamt of having and she is so… damn… lovable, precious, cute and awesome that she brings out the absolute best in Nicolas Cage. The looks on her face as she is happy… she glows, she’s absolutely neon, in terms of the vitality that she expresses in the film. Just, the absolute dream of the “lost daughter” you may have out there somewhere. Absolutely the best 14-15 year old actress I had seen in forever… then I went to IMDB and discovered she was 24 years old and I was left in shock… cuz she looks SOOOOO MUCH younger than that in this film. This is an actress to keep an eye on, and seeing that she is in Tim Burton’s upcoming BIG FISH… well it delighted me all the more. She rules.

Then there is Sam Rockwell… He is such a fantastic physical performer. Sam is quickly becoming one of my favorite actors. He has this aspect of him that reminds me of Frederic Forrest from THE GRAVY TRAIN. This primed lunacy ready to explode. He lives so completely within a scene. I believe he occupies the reality that is being presented. You never for a second don’t believe that he’s just that crazy cool person that ya never knew what he was going to do next… type of guy. Playing opposite of Nicolas Cage was a master stroke of casting genius. They play wonderful together.

As for Ridley Scott’s direction… In many ways, I don’t know if he’s ever made a film with characters more alive. More filled with energy and vitality. His choice in music to back this film… well, Hans Zimmer does the score – but the mixture between him and the “soundtrack choices” haven’t been this good since Zimmer danced with the soundtrack to TRUE ROMANCE. Ridley’s choices in this movie are absolutely impeccable, until he completely drops the ball and shatters it beyond repair. The “ONE YEAR LATER” sequence was so unnecessary, so insanely just flat out asinine that I had to fight screaming out, “WHAT A LOAD OF FUCKING SHIT!” However – controlling myself… reasoning out that Ridley had made such a great film, with such a minor, albeit ludicrously stupid, mistake… that I couldn’t NOT recommend the movie for you folks, cuz… with the exception of the epilogue… this film is great. Ridley did fantastic work that deserves to be recommended… you just need to be warned, that it comes to a crashing end… so don’t forget your personal portable music device… 10 minutes of music – if I may, I suggest taking Cab Calloway’s MINNIE THE MOOCHER and ST JAMES INFIRMARY – then open your eyes.

NOW FOR THE SPOILERS

--- Don’t read this ---

Go check out the film – close your eyes after the ONE YEAR LATER bit --- then come back and read the following.

The stuff I’m going to discuss below WOULD ruin the film for you, so PLEASE…

Just go away, come back after you’ve seen the movie.

MASSIVE SPOILERS!

Ok…

so you’ve seen the movie.

You know now that essentially MATCHSTICK MEN is a film noir.

That there is a brilliant twist on the femme fatale angle, that Nicolas Cage is playing a wonderful Burt Lancaster type character that is going to be fucked hard by the betrayal of everyone around him.

Personally – I felt the last shot should’ve been him.. his ass hanging out of his hospital gown looking out over Los Angeles realizing that he’d been screwed. At that moment – he knows he’s been fucked. It’s done. Rich stuff gone… Life over. I didn’t need to see him going to his P.O. Box… didn’t need him checking the doggie or going to his ‘daughters’ alleged home. In the classic days – they didn’t feel the need to dot all the “I’s” or cross all the “t’s”. The reason was because they allowed those details to be filled in by an audience. That those shots are there… it didn’t bother me too much, but it was the first sign of a misstep over the course of the whole film, so it was a bit off putting.

Then there is that god damned “ONE YEAR LATER” bit.

Can you imagine if at the End of CASABLANCA they had had the “One Year Later” bit. You see the celebration of the end of the war. Sam, Rick and Louis all back in Paris celebrating… The joy of having ended the great war, when Ilsa walks in… She walks up to Bogie – falls into his arms… Tells him that Victor had a heart attack and died, and Rick kisses and assures her that for Today and all of the tomorrows, that they’ll always have Paris. AH… there we go… the happy ending. Rick gets the girl… Paris is safe… and we don’t have to wonder what happened next.

The reason you don’t make those decisions for the audience is that ambiguity… it can be great. The story of MATCHSTICK MEN ends with the con artist being conned. That’s it. That’s the story. He gets the sting, the feel of what it is like. Who he becomes after that… what happens next… that is the beautiful mystery of life. That thing that you and your friends…. You and your loved ones can discuss.

Sure – you have the option to do the fucking retarded ending they chose… or you can imagine that upon feeling the sting of the con – he realizes that his entire life has been spent doing exactly what has been done to him, and he takes the swan dive off the top of that building he’s on. OR – he becomes a revenge obsessed man, spending the rest of his days tracking his ex-partner and the alleged daughter down, till they cough it all up. Or you believe he is able to just let it all go and move on with his life… The point being… That is information that is COMPLETELY UNNECESSARY.

Like on the T2 dvds – where James Cameron has the Old Sarah Connor and Senator John Connor in an idyllic Washington D.C… Ya see, James Cameron understood… the uncertain road… that’s how to end that story.

If you want to explore what happens next, that’s the sequel… not a useless turd of an epilogue. Filming a great film noir, then shooting a ten minute epilogue which basically is there to say… “Awwww, no hard feelings” SUCKS ASS! I take it all back? That’s how you want this great story of a criminal getting his comeuppance?

Fuck that epilogue in the squeaky clean left ear! How a director as great as Ridley Scott, having made a film as wonderful as MATCHSTICK MEN could allow the film to be COMPLETELY SHAFTED by such a stupid turn… was it a test screening add on? Was it a studio note? Or was it Ridley Scott just having a momentary lapse? Whatever the case, I wish I erase the memory of watching that horrible fucking last 10 minutes. It is so rare to watch a film as satisfying as this… to have it then suck ass like this… well, it makes me want to just watch PAPER MOON and ignore this film altogether… and that’s a shame!