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AICN COMICS! TalkBack League Of @$$Holes Reviews!!
Hey, everyone. "Moriarty" here with some Rumblings From The Lab.
I thought I’d scared them away with my perpetual tardiness. Instead, it turns out they were just doing an impression of me, and so now, here they are, a little late but packed full of 12 essential vitamins and minerals, just for you!!
They’re the comic reviewers 3 out of 4 doctors recommend, after all...
Hola, Amigos, Cormorant here! Our grueling column-a-week schedule got a little sidetracked last week, so for the first time ever, we decided to kick back and take a smoke break for a few days, combining reviews for two weeks’ worth of comics into the mighty column you see here before you. The @$$holes would like to apologize if this led to confusion in your weekly comic buying, as we know it’s difficult to pick the good stuff without our Wizened-Hermit-On-A-Mountain advice.
Highlight review of the week: Lizzybeth’s coverage of CUCKOO, a comic written and drawn by someone with Multiple Personality Disorder(!). Sounds more innovative than anything else reviewed here, including the books I myself cover. Speaking of which…
CATWOMAN #15
Writer: Ed Brubaker
Artist: Cameron Stewart
Publisher: DC Comics
Reviewed by Cormorant
I’ve been a pretty big supporter of Ed Brubaker’s relaunched CATWOMAN, with its gritty crime-fiction edge and movement away from the lead as merely a sexy adventureress. You can see me calling it “one of the best books DC has to offer” here, and providing rave reviews for the first collection and an original CATWOMAN graphic novel here.
And now, I’m ready to drop the book based on a single issue.
Kind of extreme, eh? Well, so’s the incident that precipitates the change of heart. This latest issue is the fourth of a five part storyline in which Selina Kyle (that’s Catwoman, for you latecomers) has found that her oft-carefree “Robin Hood” adventuring has wrought some horrific consequences. A reunion with her long-estranged sister has been cut short by her sister’s kidnapping, the East End Community Center she built with millions in mob money has been blown to pieces, and her two closest friends – Holly and Slam Bradley – have had the shit beat out of them. All of this has been engineered by Selina’s own personal “Khan” – the crime boss Black Mask, whom she stole from and humiliated – and like Khan, he’s far more interested in tormenting his adversary than in a quick revenge killing.
Which brings us to the latest issue, a bleak chapter that gives over most of its screentime to Black Mask’s various methods of payback. The relevant scene for me is a horrific torture sequence involving Selina’s sister that’s about on par with the infamous torture scene from RESERVOIR DOGS. Now here’s the thing – with Catwoman being a character I’ve never been very attached to and this book existing on a sort of periphery of the more traditional DC Universe, I’ve mostly been cool with the gritty tone of the book in issues past. And yet…when I came to the scene in question, it was like hitting a goddamn brick wall; I was almost ready to drop the book right then and there. I suppose we all have our own limits as to what is and isn’t acceptable in a superhero comic, or even a book that’s merely a cousin to superhero comics, and for me, this issue exceeded those limits. It moved from PG-13 cop show-level to David Fincher’s SEVEN, and once you’ve taken that step, I don’t think there’s any going back. I was enjoying CATWOMAN as gritty outlaw noir, but this is just too bleak. Aiding and abetting the torture sequence tone is Holly’s beating at the hands of a pack of juveniles, recalling nothing so much as the similarly nasty sequence in the movie KIDS.
What else to say about the issue when there’s such an obvious sticking point? I can’t think of much. The scenes that don’t involve Black Mask’s revenge are largely of Catwoman working her way through informants and underlings as she prepares to dish out some revenge of her own. I can’t say I’m looking forward to it. In what may be the greatest Daredevil story of all time, DAREDEVIL: BORN AGAIN, Frank Miller painted a portrait of truly monstrous villainy, but ultimately countered it with themes of forgiveness, reconciliation, and personal redemption. Brubaker is a good writer – even great sometimes – but I truly fear that this is going to be a tale in which vengeance only begets vengeance, and that holds no interest for me.
Final judgment: I’ll read the next issue to see how things play out, but as previously noted, there’s really no turning back when you heap this level of misery on your protagonists. The book has truly become a different creature than the one I was enjoying for the previous fourteen issues, and no longer feels appropriate for a Batman tie-in, no matter how tangential. I have some of the same trepidation about ALIAS over at Marvel, but perhaps because the lead there is an original character I give it some leeway. Of course, even the decidedly R-rated ALIAS hasn’t shown acts so grisly as this latest CATWOMAN. For those looking for quality crime stories, I recommend instead Brubaker’s Vertigo graphic novel, SCENE OF THE CRIME, and THE FALL from Drawn & Quarterly.
CUCKOO Vol. 1
Madison Clell
Green Door Studios
Reviewed by: Lizzybeth
You don't hear much about autobiographical comics, which is surprising considering how important they have been to independent comics. The underground comics movement was built in part on autobiographical writings by folks like R. Crumb, and many essential works (OUR CANCER YEAR, I NEVER LIKED YOU, A CHILD’S LIFE, MAUS) have used different elements of autobiography to powerful effect. Still, it is much harder to draw readers to biography in a medium so well known for its escapist tendencies. Living up to this legacy as well as attracting an audience is a struggle for a title like CUCKOO, but in an unusual way this title has managed both, reaching audiences well outside of the established comics fandom. CUCKOO is recommended by author and victims advocate Andrew Vachss and used by therapists in practice as both explanatory and inspirational material on the struggles of living with mental illness. It is the story of a woman dealing with DID, or Dissociative Identity Disorder, once known as Multiple Personality Disorder. It is alternately humorous, involving, enlightening, and horrifying, written with the immediacy and honesty of a truly courageous artist.
The first CUCKOO collection pulls together a number of short pieces and one longer story from the first thirteen issues of the comic. Except for “The Long Story”, which delves into Clell’s college experience and describes the emergence of her alters, the collection does not follow any particular chronological order. Each segment introduces one of her personalities, or describes an aspect of her daily life as a multiple. It is difficult at times to read. By necessity at least part of the story must go into the dreadful circumstances that would cause a mind to fracture, and the depiction of these experiences is so raw that at one point the author interrupts with a page of warning that you may not want to read any further. Elsewhere, explanatory segments such as “The Panel” address many of the questions the reader is probably wanting to ask the author, putting a human face on a strange and often misunderstood condition. She addresses these issues with a surprising amount of humor and frankness in segments like “Lemons <---> Lemonade (how to turn your goddamn traumatic history into something useful for once)” and “Auditing the ID”, in which she learns one person can run three simultaneous bank accounts without knowing it (and, apparently, her alters are much better at money management than she is!). As she describes it, living with alters seems somewhat like sharing a house with roommates that you converse with irregularly and have absolutely no control over. Their comings and goings, the moving of furniture, invitation of guests, general housecleaning, breakages, and more serious emergencies - it all goes on with or without you, whether you like it or not. Unfortunately, the house in this case is a young woman’s body, and Madison is only one of the personalities living in it, and all of them are collaborating on this document of their experience.
The thing is, you could only tell this story in comics. Only through the unique combination of the printed word and image can her experience really be captured, in the way that comics can show the distance between thought and action, between emotional reality and physical detail. The author skillfully grants us glimpses into her subconscious and thought processes in a very visual manner. Clell has a constantly engaging style and clever methods of describing how she experiences the world. For example, she demonstrates the experience of “losing time” with the turn of a page, leading from one image to an unfamiliar and unrelated image in a maneuver Scott McCloud would applaud. Many scenes are crowded with a mix of alternate personalities and distinct, non-alter characters, such as the scene where Madison is looking on in horror as her body, under the control of 10-year-old personality June, is climbing into boyfriend Jacob’s lap. The sometimes murky visuals seem to be floating up directly from memory, packed with an emotional, visceral punch. It is a fascinating read and yet another example of how comics can be used to tell stories that couldn’t be told as effectively elsewhere.
There is a good amount of CUCKOO online at CuckooComic, where you can also order the CUCKOO collection directly from Green Door Studios.
Cormorant back again with a quick SPOILER WARNING!!! Comedian touches on a few notable revelations from ULTIMATES #8 in the following review, so if you read it before you’ve read the issue, don’t come bitchin’ to us that we spoiled it!
THE ULTIMATES #8
Written by Mark Millar
Drawn by Bryan Hitch
Published by Marvel Comics
Reviewed by The Comedian
What can I say? Nothing Millar does really shocks me anymore. An incestuous innuendo cover with Wanda and Pietro fresh from a photo shoot for Fredericks of Hollywood? Nope. Hawkeye & Black Widow going all Neo & Trinity on the Financial District and wiping out hundreds of “seemingly innocent” civilians who are really just “Ultimate Skrulls”? Yawn. Ultimate Thor, Ultimate Iron Man & Ultimate Colossus hanging out at a dance club named “The Tool Box” on the Lower West Side of Manhattan? OK, that hasn’t happened yet but we all know it’s right around the corner.
My point is, enough with the bastardizing as a means of characterization. It’s like that episode of Buffy where she’s fighting that demon who made itself look like Giles’ hot dead girlfriend. “Ok. I get it. You’re evil.” Probably the only thing that shocked me about this issue was what a lame-assed plot device this whole storyline with the aliens is.
The only thing worse than cheapening World War II (probably humanity’s greatest battle to save its collective soul from the throws of ugly malevolence) by turning it into a secret war against alien invaders is having Captain America know about it. That pretty much shatters everything that makes that character and his origins so pertinent. Basically what Millar’s leading into is that Ultimate Captain America was created in his WWII heyday not to topple fascism but really to just spook around hunting aliens. So instead of Dr. Erskine whom are we going to end up with, Dr. Emil Gargunza?
As some of you stated in the last TalkBack, the biggest problem with this issue is that it throws a wrench in the established cynical, hyper-realism that Millar has clung so desperately to with most of his Ultimate work. My biggest criticism is that he’s trying to soften, desensitize and “ultimately” cheapen great acts of malice by hiding behind a dime-a-dozen plot device ripped straight from the cliché conspiracy theorist coffee table book.
It just looks like he’s fresh out of ideas. Which is a shame because as much work as he’s put into bastardizing The Avengers, I’d love to see what kind of sick shit he could do with their rogues gallery. You know, like having Ultimate Loki be a scummy Politician. Or making Ultimate Mandarin a sex slave trader who uses his Calvin Klein knock-off factory in Taiwan to launder heroin and opium profits. Or starting Ultimate Ultron off as the Wasp’s sentient “pocket rocket.” OK, that was bit much but this is Mark Millar we’re talking about.
Instead we’re getting this lame, half-assed X-Files crap that was played out 5 years ago.
P.S. Millar, if you’re reading this, Hollywood called. They said they really appreciate all the work you and Hitch are doing for them with all the nod wink celebrity cameos and casting. Avi’s got them completely psyched to greenlight this puppy. They really like Bryan’s pencils and they’d love for him to do the boards on it. The only thing is Sam Jackson wants his driver’s 14-year old nephew to get the first pass on the script and after that they’re probably going to get Akiva Goldsman and Shane Black to collaborate on the rewrites. However, they are offering you a gig as Sam’s driver’s nephew’s assistant. You’re good with menus, right? Anyways, they just wanted you to know that they’re really thankful for all your hard work and input.
Ciao.
THE CROSSOVERS # 1
Written by Robert Rodi
Art by Mauricet, Ernie Colon, Mark McNabb
Published by CrossGen
Reviewed by Buzz Maverik
Do you like superheroes? Do you like Buffy-type vampire slayers? Do you like heroic fantasy? Do you like X-Files alien conspiracies? If you do, the chances are very good that you will like THE CROSSOVERS # 1...if you have a sense of humor and are willing to use it.
The Crossovers are an American nuclear family who could come out of John Hughes' movie-town Shermer, Illinois, but happen to live in Crosstown U.S.A. Dad, Carter, downplays his brood's quirks while Mom, Calista, worries that they eat balanced meals. Son, Clifford, talks like a kid who is into science fiction and only wants to eat sugary cereal. Daughter, Cris, is worried about getting fat.
Boring, eh? That is until Dad dons a cape and becomes Wylie style hero The Archetype, battling a former co-worker who has mutated into a super strong monster. And Mom fights to save a little girl from an attack by a vampire lord. And Sis slips into a Tolkienesque world where she's a warrior princess. And li'l Bro takes control of a snoopy neighbor's mind and then meets with two gray alien types.
That's the set-up and it's a blast. Writer Robert (CODE NAME: KNOCKOUT) Rodi wins here because he goes for smiles instead of big laughs. He's having fun with these different genres, not making fun of them. Each character's storyline is presented seriously and stays true to its genre. Nothing grim and gritty here, but it's only the linking concept that makes it all funny.
The art by Mauricet is, likewise, nicely subtle. We always say a nice blend of cartoon style and realism, and we can say it here. His art gives the book its grounding, establishing its reality. It might have been fun to see Calista's adventure look like a Bernie Wrightson horror comic, or Carter's battle with Gargantujaun (don't ask) look like Jack Kirby's Marvel slugfests, or Cris' fantasy world look like SOJOURN but the Crossover family is all coming from the same Universe so the look works well.
I hope this book goes on for a long, long time. Its potential is infinite -- I can see Clifford in Middle Earth, Calista's wooden stakes useless against the gray aliens...careful, I'm sounding like a fan!
Title: WEAPON X #5
Writer: Frank Tieri
Pencils: Georges Jeanty
Inks: Dexter Vines
Publisher: MARVEL
Reviewer: Ambush Bug
This will be my third review of WEAPON X. In each review, I have chided the creators of the title for relying on cliché-ridden, Hollywood B-movie plots to move the story along. I’ve accused the title of being predictable and uninspired, but for some reason I keep on coming back for more. I think it may be the characters. ALPHA FLIGHT has always been a fave of mine and this title sports a lot of old members of that heroic team from Canada. There are also a lot of intriguing dynamics going on between characters that, over time, may develop into something more than passably interesting. The main reason for me to review this title is because from one issue to the next, I can see the writing and the art evolve and grow into something better than the previous issue. For this fact alone, I deem this book review-worthy once again.
Recap anyone? WEAPON X is the name of a top secret government program located in the forests of Canada. This is the same program that long ago created the X-Men’s most popular character, Wolverine. Wolvie isn’t in this title, but his presence is always felt in the form of the mysterious Director, who is…um…the director of the Weapon X program. The Director was hideously scarred when Wolverine escaped the Weapon X program long ago. This disfigurement awakened a hatred in the Director – a hatred for all mutants. Since that day Wolverine left him in the snow to die, the Director has been building this program to put an end to the growing mutant threat. For the first four issues, this series focused on the construction of Weapon X’s elite black ops squad; consisting of such ne'er-do-wells as Sabretooth, Kane the Android, Mesmero, Sauron, Marrow the Morlock, the mysterious Agent Zero, and Wild Child, Aurora, and Madison Jeffries (these three, formerly of Alpha Flight).
The first four issues of this series brought together all of the members of Weapon X and established some interesting relationships and conflicts in the group. The psychotic love quadrangle of Sabretooth, Wild Child, the Director, and Aurora is one ongoing storyline that I am looking forward to seeing develop in future issues. Now that the team has taken shape, I thought we were in store for a series of adventures where this cadre of villains and gray-area characters would be forced to reassess their own beliefs when faced with an agenda that supersedes any evil that they may have performed in the past. I figured we would see some redemptions, some betrayals, some conflicted morals - all of that good stuff you don’t really see in a comic that centers on squeaky clean heroic characters. And we might yet see these things, but that’s not what issue five is all about.
Issue five is a damn good stand alone issue that establishes just how much of a threat this Weapon X program and its mad Director really are. The story is told from the perspective of a young mutant boy, abducted with his mutant family in the middle of the night and taken to a secret compound called Neverland, which bears a striking resemblance to a concentration camp. And it should, because that’s what it is. What unfolds is a heart-wrenching tale of despair, false hope, and tragedy. By telling this tale through the eyes of a child, the writer gives an innocent view of the Weapon X program and its atrocious agenda. It is a humanizing effect that a lot of comics, caught up in their own little world filled with spandex clad do-gooders and their grimacing arch-nemeses, often forget to characterize. This story uses innocence to give context to the fantastic and often horrific events that happen in the world.
This issue also caters to those continuity hounds out there by answering the questions regarding the whereabouts of such second rate characters as Dr. Cecelia Reyes and Maggot from the X-Men, Ape and Leech from the Morlocks, Random from X-Factor, Diamond Lil from Alpha Flight, and the Mutant Liberation Front from X-Force. Little details like the mind-reader who is shattered into a pile of body parts, but still lives, and the Boxbots – altered versions of the Box armor from the old Alpha Flight series – help support the “Aw cool!” fanboy factor that occurs quite often in this series. These nice little details show that the creators not only know their comic book history, but are willing to use that knowledge by adding little treats for the fans to enjoy.
That is not to say that this is a perfect book. The story starts out with word balloons, but quickly segues into narration via caption boxes throughout the rest of the book. Narration of this form is okay, but it often distances the reader from the action. When a writer has a character tell you what people are saying instead of having the actual people say the words, he is breaking the first rule in good writing: show, don’t tell. Because of the caption box narration, I found myself disconnected from the tragic events unfolding on the page before me.
Another problem has to do with the fact that this is a stand alone issue. In a day and age when certain writers who will remain nameless *cough - Bendis - cough* choose to drag out a story until the thickest plot thread is worn thinner than Rob Liefeld’s credibility, it is surprising for me to see this tale scrunched into a single issue. The issue works well, but there are scenes that seemed rushed (particularly the doctor’s role in the ending) and moments that were skipped over in order to make this a stand alone story. A stronger tale would have taken its time to unfold at a slower pace.
Just as the writing has improved from issue to issue, the art team of Jeanty and Vines has kicked it up a notch too. Jeanty has a clean penciling style and isn’t afraid to use dynamic angles to push the action quotient of the panel. The art team’s use of shadow in the opening sequence is especially effective in casting the Weapon X team in an ominous light. Jeanty suffers from one problem. You can tell which panels that he likes to do and those that he doesn’t like so much. It’s the added detail some of the more action-oriented panels have that indicate that the guy likes to do the superhero stuff. And that’s okay. Usually, this book is filled with superhero stuff, but this issue lets the drama unfold slowly and has more quiet moments than a usual issue. If Jeanty took the time to make the quiet moments as exciting as the action-oriented ones, the art would be solid all the way through. That said, the guy has talent. His faces convey emotion and his panels tell the story well. Jeanty’s art is a big part of why I am recommending this book.
Yes, this story uses all of the old concentration camp movie clichés. But it uses those old clichés effectively. I bought into the drama as it unfolded and was truly angry with the Director and the program in the end. Although the pacing was rushed and the writing was disconnected at times, I was intrigued to know more about what these evil forces were capable of and if and when they will ever be stopped. The book may not be burning off the shelves. No one is debating about it and this will probably be one of the few WEAPON X #5 reviews you will read, but this B-list book isn’t as bad as a lot of the A-list crap out there on the shelves. The writing and art team have developed a truly sinister tale around a truly sinister cast. For those of you who like to cheer on the bad guys, this book has a lot to scream about. This book has been on a crescendo from the first issue. Give it a try. It ain’t as bad as you think.
THUNDEBOLTS #75
Fabian Nicieza: Writer
Manuel Garcia: Artist
Marvel Comics: Publisher
Vroom Socko: Marvel’s Most Wanted.
I’m not sure where to start.
For something like six years this book has been my Bottom of the Pile title. You know, the book you hold off reading, because you want to save the best for last? That been T-Bolts for a long time. This titles been up and down quality-wise under both Kurt Busiek and Fabian Nicieza, but the book has stayed in its prestigious position for two reasons. The first is the constant twists and turns; the second is the constantly evolving characterization. For a book that had its start in the imaginative dearth that was Marvel in the late 90’s, that’s pretty impressive. And now, it’s dead.
Nicieza has always been a favorite writer of mine. One of the most enjoyable moments from my time at GrayHaven was when I had the chance to interview him last year. He doesn’t have the name recognition of Bendis or Moore, but he’s always been a competent craftsman, telling solid stories that have a long-term destination. His career at Marvel has been one of the steadiest, most professional in the company. And now, it’s dead.
The worst thing about this issue is that it was intended as a stepping-stone for something bigger that now will never come to pass. It ends with a new motivation for the team that, while not original, is always compelling. The team that we see at the end… isn’t one that I trust to their newfound mission. At least one of them, possibly two or three, aren’t there to follow their leader. I’m guessing they’re there to keep their new leader in line, possibly also reporting to a former leader as well. I don’t know this for sure, but it would have been fun to see this story followed through. But now, it’s dead.
Sure, Thunderbolts #76 is coming out next month, but this team isn’t in it. Marvel is plugging it as a “bold new direction; Marvel meets Fight Club.” Folks, I read the preview of it at Marvel’s web site, and it reads more like “Marvel meets Lionheart”. I don’t know about you, but when I hear the words “bold new direction,” I don’t think of shitty Van Damme movies. I don’t know how long this new take will last, but creative-wise, it’s dead.
Bill Jemass, Joe Quesada, I don’t know why the decision was made to fire Nicieza, but it’s a mistake. Sure, he didn’t have any re-imagined versions of classic characters committing mass murder while ripping off The Matrix, or any gay cowboys eating pudding, or whatever the fuck you think is promo worthy. What this book DID have going for it was characters that felt like real people, that grew and evolved while staying true to their roots. I know that the idea of people finding entertainment from something that simple is alien to you. You had a quality product, gentlemen, and you threw it away. I hope that you eventually realize the mistake you’ve made, and take action to correct it. Until then… well, to me at least, you’re dead.
LUBA’S COMICS AND STORIES #3: OFELIA AND THE LITTLE ONES
Gilbert Hernandez
Fantagraphics Books
Reviewed by: Lizzybeth
I think I’ve made it known in these parts just how big a fan I am of LOVE AND ROCKETS, but I fully admit to having lost track of the dozen or so spin-offs that L&R has produced since the original series ended. I like having all of Los Bros Hernandez working under one title, so comics like WHOA NELLIE, MAGGIE AND HOPEY COLOR FUN, LUBA, LUBA'S COMICS AND STORIES, NEW LOVE, BIRDLAND, and MEASLES have managed to slip by me for the most part. Honestly, reading the relaunched L&R series is much easier than following all of these other titles. During the wait between the last two issues of L&R, I've been scooping up some of these "side" projects to see just what I've been missing. As it turns out - quite a bit. In fact, after filling the holes in my collection of Jaime Hernandez’s PENNY CENTURY, and scouting out Gilbert’s recent LUBA comics, I have come to the opinion that of late Los Bros may be producing better comics separately than they are together.
With Gilbert's sections of LOVE AND ROCKETS focusing on brand new stories like “Me for the Unknown” and following late-period characters like Fritz and Petra, the usual L&R suspects, particularly his most famous creation, Luba, have been relegated to separate titles like this one. Although this comic is called "Ofelia and the Little Ones", and features Ofelia prominently, the comic is mostly about Luba, as any story about Ofelia will tend to be. Ofelia has been looking after her cousin Luba and her brood of children for what feels like most of their lives, and seems to both resent and thrive under the conditions imposed by the situation. Even though Luba’s family has left Palomar for America, it’s still the same old story. What’s amazing about Gilbert’s characters isn’t just that you can continue to learn new things about them even after years of following their lives, but also that you can watch them making the same mistakes, or even telling the same stories, and find it just as interesting as it was the very first time. For example, there’s a rundown of Luba’s basic life story that lasts about 3 pages in this issue, none of which is new information to anyone who’s read POISON RIVER and LUBA IN AMERICA, but the sequence is pretty affecting as an old woman’s reminiscence of the path her life has taken, and is a reminder of just how well Gilbert has plotted out the trajectory of her life and character arc. At the same time, less-developed characters are getting increased attention here, giving us a somewhat rare glimpse into Ofelia’s past, and into the complex relationship she has with her troublesome cousin. I particularly enjoyed peeking into the thoughts of Luba’s young kids, who each have a distinct, and believable, personality of their own.
It’s surprising to me, but I’m enjoying Gilbert’s work in this comic more than his most recent L&R stories. Just like in LOVE AND ROCKETS, the comic is divided up into small segments of story -- but without having to jump between Jaime and Gilbert’s distinct realities, these “solo artist” titles allow for a smoother transition between tales and a greater sense of finality at the end of the issues. I’m much more attached to the characters in the LUBA comics than in the current L&R comics, and there’s none of the thin-ness that I’ve come to expect from a spun-off title. I find this title to be more cohesive as well; in this comic, Ofelia’s project of writing a book about Luba’s family ties together all of their past reminiscences and present happenings, and I came away from this issue feeling that I’ve read a whole comic instead of a piece of one. In L&R this problem is generally corrected in the trades, where the epic quality of Gilbert’s longer stories plays as a strength. This will be particularly clear in the forthcoming Complete Palomar Hardcover, rumored to be set for release this year. For a single-issue fix, however, “Ofelia and the Little Ones” hits the spot. It’s also much friendlier to new readers than recent issues of LOVE AND ROCKETS, and I would offer it to anyone curious about this long-running series. I can’t believe it’s taken me this long to discover it for myself.
Title: THE SPECTRE #25
Writer: J. M. DeMatteis
Pencils: Norm Breyfogle
Inks: Dennis Janke
Publisher: DC Comics
Reviewer: Ambush Bug
THE SPECTRE is quite possibly, the most frustrating comic I currently read. I buy the monthly adventures of Hal Jordan’s current incarnation mostly because I was a fan of Hal Jordan Green Lantern. Hal Jordan was a hotshot pilot. He was the level-headed straight man to Green Arrow, Guy Gardner, and G’Nort. He was the best damn Green Lantern ever. In the time before his fall from grace, Hal Jordan was a pretty great character. I say all of these things in the past tense, because even though he is supposed to be the star of this book, THE SPECTRE is not about Hal Jordan.
A while back, I reviewed J.M. DeMatteis’ WILLWORLD Hardcover graphic novel. My main complaint about that book was that it was supposed to be about Hal Jordan, but the writer just didn’t seem to know or want the readers to know anything about the character. He spent the entire book placing Hal on a journey to find himself, but in the end it was evident that the search was futile because the writer himself didn’t know who the character was. The same can be said for THE SPECTRE. The current SPECTRE series is a crapshoot from month to month. DeMatteis has been trying hard to build an interesting story to tie to the concept of the Spectre. He’s trying to let us know that Hal has done a lot of bad things and this is his last shot at his own redemption with this Spectre gig. The writer is also trying to explain exactly what makes the Spectre so special. The Spectre is a Spirit of Redemption and Vengeance. He’s an abstract concept. Like all abstract concepts, the Spectre is best explained through examples. So far in this series, in between issues focusing on Hal’s redemption, J.M. DeMatteis throws in a stand-alone story that attempts to explain the concept of the Spectre. Issue #25 is such an issue and it is a pretty good one.
“Crime & Punishment” tells the tale of Miklos Karis, another scientific experiment gone wrong. He now goes by the name of Rabid and likes to bite the faces off of police officers and stomp on puppies till their tails don’t wag any more. The story also introduces us to a nice little plot device called Agent Franco. Franco works for the DEO, DC Universe’s government superhuman monitoring department. Her job is to bring in Rabid, but what she really wants to know is the story of the Spectre. Through the eyes of Agent Franco, the reader is given a view of the Spectre from the outside. This issue does a good job at building the mystery behind the Spectre character by raising questions about his motives. It reads more like a #1 issue than a #25.
The story is a nice little mystery. It casts the Spectre in an ominous light – something that doesn’t happen often enough in this series. I like the way DeMatteis patiently doles out information about Rabid, Agent Franco, and the Spectre’s involvement. The action is brutal and sad at the same time. Rabid is out of control, but he’s been experimented on and acts on pure animal instinct when the police attack. The premise is intriguing. Franco is determined to find out the truth, but her motives are to bring Rabid and the Spectre down and finding out the truth makes her doubt everything she has come to believe in. The ending is poignant and touching. Looking at the issue as a stand alone story, the issue works very, very well.
But looking at this issue as a part of DeMatteis story which has been unfolding since issue number one, the only feeling I have is that of frustration. Once again, the writer puts in a character on a search to find out who the Spectre is. For 25 issues, Hal Jordan has been trying to come to grips with his green-hooded side. To introduce a new character in search of the same thing is repetitious and tedious to say the least. The agent’s pursuit of the Spectre would be interesting if Hal knew everything there is to know about the Spectre, but he doesn’t.
Hal is a non-character in this title. We have seen very little of him and almost too much of the green hood. Time and time again, the lines have been clearly drawn from one issue to the next. One story is a Hal story, focusing on Hal, his niece, and the rest of his supporting cast. Then the next issue centers on the Spectre and how his ominous presence affects those in need of redemption. These stories are the best of this series so far. They’re old school, deep and dark, Jim Corrigan-like Spectre tales. It is too bad that in order to tell a decent Spectre story, DeMatteis chooses to drop any and all characterization of Hal Jordan. I want to read a story that lets me know who Hal is. I want to read a story that lets me know what is it about Hal that makes this Spectre so different from the Spectre’s past incarnations. Those stories would be interesting to read. Those stories are not being told.
Not once has DeMatteis distinguished what makes this Spectre different from the Jim Corrigan Spectre of old. With all of the baggage Hal has, one would think that this Spectre would act a bit differently from former police officer, Jim Corrigan. Why not compare the two? This would be an interesting concept to pursue. It could help strengthen the Hal character by showing us what he is and is not. I understand that the writer is trying to convey to us that Hal is new to this game, but he’s been floundering along for a while now and I might need an act of redemption if I have to see a weepy Hal in the midst of confusion one more time.
DeMatteis needs to start giving a clue to someone in this series because so far, no one knows shit about anything and it’s frustrating to read. Norm Breyfogle and Dennis Janke turn in one great looking issue after another. The art team makes the Spectre and the story around him look exciting, sympathetic, and dynamic. It is just too bad that the words and the plot meander the way they do. If you want to read a good SPECTRE story, pick up issue #25. It’s a pretty decent yarn. Just don’t plan on finding out anything about the Spectre or Hal Jordan in it.
BLACK CANARY-- ORACLE : BIRDS O' PREY tpb
Written by Chuck Dixon and Jordan B. Gorfinkel
Art by Gary Frank, Stefano Raffaele, Matt Haley, Jennifer Graves, Sal Buscema, John Dell, Bob McLeod, Wade Von Grawbadger, John Lowe, Cam Smith, Stan Woch, Sherilyn Van Valkenburgh, Gloria Vasquez, Dave Grafe
Published by DC
Reviewed by Buzz Maverik
Since the bizarre death of billionaire inventor Tony Stark --killed in his superhero identity of Iron Man when the giant android Ultimo tripped and fell on him -- many unusual aspects of Stark's personal life (such as the fact that he referred to his genitalia as "Little Anthony & The Imperials”) have come to light in the form of his journals, videos and highly annotated "little black book". Stark, a famed genius and "hound", apparently had a strong penchant for the unattainable women of the DC Universe.
Black Canary: 2 stars. Real name: Dinah Lance. Used to date Green Arrow until they broke up, he died, and came back to life. Stark notes: "I actually had a tough time wooing this little bird. She goes for the brash, big-mouthed archer type. In this tpb, she hooks up with a supervillain called Braun who fits this description, except for the archery. He looks like the kind of villain Captain America used to fight a lot in the '70s. I almost said “forget it” with her and was going to give her number to Hawkeye, but I really dig those fishnet stockings she wore until she teamed with Oracle (see Barbara Gordon; see Batgirl) at the start of this trade. Sigh! Wonder how she was able to walk around in her old costume, take taxis, check into hotels without getting arrested. I guess JLA/JSA membership will get you in more doors than Avengers membership, no matter how you're dressed. There's some great butt-shots of her that I can tell you from experience are fake. As tough as she is, her ass is as muscular as Cap's ... not that I know what Cap's ass is like. The drawing of her on the cover by Gary Frank looks very Kirbyesque. Kirby drew some of my adventures but isn't associated with Dinah or me very much."
Oracle: 2 and a half stars. Real name: Barbara Gordon. Formerly known as Batgirl. According to Stark: "I think I had a one-nighter with her when she was Batgirl back in the '60s. You forget a lot when you've drank as much as I have. It might have been Yvonne Craig, who also played the green chick on STAR TREK. We got together again when I smashed into her headquarters after she put specs for my armor on the internet. Call me kinky, but that wheelchair just did something for me."
The Huntress : Three stars. Stark was very glad he called the Huntress the next day: "The way she kneed that Braun villain in the nads! Cold-blooded! Women like her are the reason I used adamantium when I forged the codpiece on my armor! The Hulk could kick me where it counts and I wouldn't feel it."
Catwoman: Three and a half stars. Stark had apparently always wanted to steal a woman from Bruce Wayne, coming close but never "sealing the deal" with Vicky Vale and Silver St. Cloud. "I caught her breaking into my Long Island plant to steal some sort of McGuffin. After I gave her a blast of my repulsor rays, she became attracted me. We kissed, and she tried a move which I guess she's used before: she tried to claw my chest. Fortunately, my chestplate broke her claws. I usually wear my armor at the start of a date, just in case...it later morphs into an ultra-thin condom, ribbed for her pleasure."
Lois Lane: Three stars. Per Stark: "Yeah, Lois and I dated off and on before she married you-know-who. The weirdest thing I found out about Lois from this tpb is that growing up on an Army base gave her the kind of fighting skill necessary to take on an army of highly trained mercenaries. I've known lots of people who grew up on Army bases and all they got out of it was poor dental care."
The Lynx & Lady Shiva: Three stars each. A famous Starkism: "Never sleep with super villains...unless they're really hot and you're sure the rest of the Avengers won't find out."
MIDNIGHT NATION (TPB)
Writer: J. Michael Straczynski
Artist: Gary Frank
Publisher: Image Comics / Top Cow Productions
Reviewed by Cormorant
I already own the twelve individual issues that comprise the MIDNIGHT NATION trade, so when I bought the collection, the first thing I read was the material that was new to me. This being a fairly straightforward reprinting, there wasn’t a lot, but the 1/2 issue of the series that WIZARD produced as a mail-away offer is included – a fun addition – and there’s a new afterword from writer J. Michael Straczynski (“Babylon 5”). The latter is what caught my attention. I can’t say the trade appeared at a time when I was particularly in the mood to re-read the story, but after reading Straczynski’s very personal motivation for writing it, I was reminded of its emotional potency. I’ll leave the details of the afterword for readers, but it involves Straczynski’s life-changing break from a commune in the late 70’s (he even calls it a “cult”), late night walks through the bad side of town, and a violent beating. It’s grim but fascinating.
And so is MIDNIGHT NATION. At its heart, this is a book about the loneliness and despair that has gripped every person at one time or another when they’ve felt disconnected from the rest of the world. We’re not talking bland suburban ennui here, though - MIDNIGHT NATION is a horror story, and in Straczynski’s world, a metaphorical disconnect from humanity can become a literal one; lose your path in life, and you might actually fade from existence to find yourself living in a much darker iteration of the real world – the Midnight Nation. On this other side, the homeless, the loveless, and the forgotten live bleak lives in small collectives. Geography and building structures are recognizable, but the streets are desolate and the only technology that works is the stuff that’s been abandoned in the real world. You’ve got to stay off the streets at night, though, because that’s when the Walkers appear – tattooed demon-men who cruise around in black vans looking for humans to snack on.
Into this world drifts David Grey, an LAPD detective. Grey’s a bit of cliché – the dedicated cop whose job cost him his marriage – but his screwed-up life certainly makes him a candidate for citizenship in the Midnight Nation. His seeming death in the first chapter bring him to this strange land, and he becomes the viewer’s eyes and ears to its arcane secrets. More pressingly, he learns that he’s got one year’s time in this world to reclaim his lost soul or be transformed forever into one of the demonic Walkers. The good news: his guide to the world is a hot chick named Laurel wearing a belly shirt. The bad news: his soul is being held hundreds of miles away in New York, can only be reached by walking, and is quite possibly in the hands of the Living Embodiment of Evil. Plus Laurel thinks he’s an ass.
Straczynski’s tale works on a number of levels. First off, it’s a strong road trip story, made novel by combining that genre with the epic quest paradigm and wrapping the whole thing in memorably weird horror trappings. I like all those elements on their own, and JMS has brought them together with all the scope you’d expect from the man who carried the epic BABYLON 5 to fruition. Just as with BABYLON 5, there are little Straczynski-isms scattered throughout that bothered me, from dialogue that sometimes veers too far into melodrama or cutesy banter (see also, Peter David) to the occasional incidence of heavy-handed allegory; but also like BABYLON 5, I found myself wrapped up in the sheer imagination and scope of the thing to the point that the flaws were largely mitigated.
The big hook for MIDNIGHT NATION, beyond the solid characterizations and the eerie setting, is the existential backdrop that informs David Grey’s journey. While David’s travels among the denizens of the Midnight Nation reveal Straczynski’s not-always-upbeat thoughts on the nature of human misery and capacity for self-denial, the BIG QUESTIONS begin to take shape around him. Is there a God? If so, why does he allow such suffering in the world? Why does he allow people to slip between the cracks of society and fall into despair? And if God lets this happen because he’s an imperfect being, is it possible that his opposite number might have something truly better to offer? It’s weighty stuff, and often quite dark. Throughout David’s journey, he’s burdened with an air of inevitability regarding his likely failure and the ultimate fate of Laurel, and true to life, there are no easy answers or magical solutions.
Artist Gary Frank is best known to most folks for his run on THE INCREDIBLE HULK during the Peter David years, or more recently for his work on SUPERGIRL and AVENGERS, and his traditionalist drafting skills serve the book well. From his depiction of the diverse cast of world-weary survivors to the terrifying Walkers to the detailed cityscapes that make you believe David Grey has truly walked from one side of the United States to the other, Gary Frank is more than able to keep up with Straczynski’s demanding script. I did find the protagonist to be on the plain side with his generically handsome looks, and there are maybe a few too many instances of scantily clad women in an otherwise realistic story (or is that a Top Cow mandate?). Still, beyond some musings of what a more horror-oriented artist might have done with the material (Bill Sienkiewicz, Steve Bissette, Junji Ito…), I have no complaints about the visuals. The coloring is exceptionally good.
Final judgment: The highest compliment I can pay MIDNIGHT NATION is that the uncomfortable questions it asks have stayed with me, and the fate of the characters still resonates. I loved the unpredictable nature of David Grey’s journey. Loved all the imaginative details like the visits from Lazarus, the haunting, monosyllabic braying of the Walkers, and the severed, one-eyed head of a baby doll through which the Prince of Evil communicates at one point. But for the fact that this story is pretty much concluded, I’d love to see JMS revisit this morbid world again in the future. Unless you’re just not a fan of his writing style (and yeah, there’re a few of you out there), then MIDNIGHT NATION comes highly recommended.
@$$HOLE CASTING COUCH!!!
Hey all. Ambush Bug here with another @$$hole Casting Couch. Word is that there’s been some movement on the PUNISHER film. Jonathan Hensleigh is set to direct. And now, word from up high says that Thomas Jane may be starring as Frank Castle. If Jane gets the role, that would be okay by me. He’s a talented actor that would no doubt give a great performance. But looking back at all of those Punisher comics I’ve read, I can’t say that that is the first actor that comes to mind.
Although I am not a fan of the current PUNISHER series, I would like to see a good Punisher film make it to the big screen. This film could be your typical revenge film laden with clichés and filled with pointless violence, but I’d love to have the people behind this project tackle THE PUNISHER with a bit of sophistication and style. Murder is the most despicable act one man can do to another. Crime has consequences. What must happen to a person to turn a loving family man into an unrelenting killing machine? Can one man’s war on crime amount to anything in today’s violent society? I would love to see a film that depicts a caring, loving family man and how all of his humanity was stripped away in one tragic instant. I doubt this film will receive this type of mature treatment, but a Bug can dream, can’t he?
Last week, I saw NARC and loved the hell out of it. It was tough, gritty, and everything I would want to see in a crime drama. I’ve heard a lot of TalkBackers clamoring for Ray Liotta to be cast as the Punisher, and I have to agree. The guy had a presence in NARC. He was dangerous. He fought the war on crime and lost everything because of it. He’d seen and done it all. The scene in the tunnel is what sealed the deal for me. Liotta walks in slo-mo towards the camera with a gun in his hand and cold death in his eyes. That’s the Punisher. Liotta is the right age for the role. I don’t want Frank Castle to be some young Gulf War vet. He’s been around the block. Through the years, he’s developed into the perfect killing machine. Liotta is close to 45 and still in good shape. He could have been slogging around in VC territory during Vietnam. He may have put on a lot of weight for his role in NARC, but he looked pretty slim at the Golden Globes. He’s got the right size and stature. And he’s got those scary, scary eyes.
As far as a supporting cast goes, the Punisher doesn’t really have one. Short of the cartoon cutout characters that Ennis has walking around in the current series, anyone who comes into contact with Frank usually ends up getting themselves perished in one gruesome way or another. One character that stands out over all of them is Microchip, Punisher’s arms supplier and gadget man. The Microman was Frank’s version of Alfred. He was the human angle who tried to ground the Punisher into reality when his war on crime became too much. Danny Aiello is a talented, older actor who has a lot of heart. He’d be superb for the role.
An enemy of the Punisher doesn’t live long. If the Punisher deems you worthy to be punished, you won’t be around for more than a few issues. I’m sure a Punisher film would have a massive body count, so I’m not going to put forth the extra effort to cast the actors playing Thug #1 and Tuff #2. Jigsaw is the closest thing the Punisher has to an arch-enemy. This hitman with a face full of scars may be the only perp that has successfully avoided getting Swiss-cheesed by Frank’s uzi. I’d put a talented actor like William Fichtner in the role and let him go nuts with it.
This film seems to be on the fast track towards being made. I hope the people behind it consider the classic Punisher tales of old and forget the lame cartoon Marvel is trying to pass as the Punisher these days. Those old stories had a lot of action and even more bullets, but they also told a tale of tragedy filled with ambiguous questions about justice and morality. Let’s hope the people behind and in front of the camera can make this Punisher film something more than just another DEATH WISH knockoff. As always, I invite you all to agree, disagree, tear me a new one, or make give your own picks. I'm sure every @$$hole in the Talkbacks has an opinion. Let ‘er rip.
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Who did he pick? Betty or Veronica? And did Jughead find that oil leak in his jalopy?
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goddamit when will we see ultimate speedball!?!?
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Jan 30, 2003 4:30:37 AM CST
Speaking of NARC... anybody else think Jason Patric would make a
by psyclops
Just saw NARC a couple of hours ago and have to agree with the idea of Ray Liotta as The Punisher, the man has a very powerful screen presence. He would be a great choice and much more realistic than... oh, I dunno... Dolph Lungren! With that said, how many of you would agree with Jason Patric as BATMAN? He was just as good as Ray Liotta in NARC and would really fit the part. I would never have pictured him as Bats until I was sitting in that theater tonight watching the drama unfold (he's a much better choice than David Boreanaz as someone in another talkback suggested). Anyone agree with me or am I retarded for even bringing it up? Hmmm... Christopher Nolan directing a dark, moody Batman film featuring Jason Patric as the Dark Knight and Guy Peirce as the Scarecrow. Now that's a movie I wouldn't mind handing over some green to see.
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Are you guys saying that you DID NOT see the Aliens behind WWII storyline coming? Really? It was in the very first issue. It was hinted at in Ultimate Marvel team up with the Hulk. C'mon boys, pay attention. You dare call yourselves comic fans? And really, the "hyper reality" you Miller haters are now claiming is being tossed aside, that we Miller lovers claimed was why we liked the series, was never based on what the heroes were doing for adventures or who they were fighting, it was based on who the heroes were. The fact that they had flaws and quirks and realistic reactions to the world around due to the fact that they were super powered celebrities. If we were going to bitch that the "hyper reality" is ruined by the presence of aliens, why would we accept costumed heroes in the first place, being that their very existence is unrealistic? As for "cheapening" WWII, that
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Jan 30, 2003 5:39:23 AM CST
I think everyone should lay their cards on table, just so we kno
by qwerty uiop
This week I bought (and keep in mind I didn't make the trip to the shop last week) X-statics, Daredevil, The Filth, and Global frequency. What'd you all pick up?
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Different origins to Wolverine?
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Wow, i had such hopes for this series. The ultimates is quickly going down the shitter, with such late releases and hurry up art like issue 8. The pencils looked rushed, as did everything else about the issue, but its no worse than Ultimate War, which i picked up two issue of. THe art is my first bitch. Pachaello (sp) can't seem to draw a normal panel, everything has to be from an annoyingly long angle or an annoyingly close one. Millar, as a writer, is quite awful. Popularity be damned, his stuff is as reactionary and blase as you can get. All he does is fuck with continuity to seem clever, and you're right, he's quickly turning the Ultimates into a laughingstock. Issue 8 shouldnt have even been released. A Matrix rip off followed by a stupid alien plot. And not to riff too much more on Ultimate War, but why does Ultimate Hulk eat people? That has to be the single worst choice ive seen made in this entire Ultimate debacle.
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The only problem with the Aliens in the Ultimates is that they have gone so far to eliminate Aliens from the rest of the Ultimate comics (the Mahfood issue of team-up being the exception). Bendis has frequently stated that there should be no aliens in this universe because it lessens any sense of reality. That's why there's a new Venom origin and there's no Shi'iar tech in the X-Men books. As far as the X-War goes it was a great idea but seems to be lacking in the actual execution, but it is still way better than the horrendous Ultimate Daredevil/Elektra that was awful despite a great creative team and great characters.
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Nowhere in Ulitmates #8 does it say that the Nazis were aliens, or that Hitler was an alien (as someone stated in the last comics talkback) just that the aliens gave the Nazis help with their rise to power. And since this is a comic book universe, that rise to power is likely to be manifest in crazy rocketships, or death rays, or ufos - hardly new entries into the fictionalized Nazi universe. Further, I don't see how aliens cheapen WWII any more than the old Cap fighting guys like Baron Blood cheapened WWII. On the other hand, I hated the Matrix rip-off (come to think of it, I found that scene a little off-putting in "The Matrix", too), I don't see why they couldn't just call the aliens "Skrulls," and the implied Quicksilver/Scarlet Witch thing... well let's just say I hope they're not planning on handing this book over to Garth Ennis. sk
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I haven't bought any comics yet this week, but I'm planning to pick up Cerebus, Ultimate War, the BPRD trade, and Wizard. sk
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........made it through the reviews without somebody trying to be "cute and funny". Buzz Maverik if you'd take what you're doing seriously, I might actually finish reading one of your reviews some day. Good job otherwise.
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I hate to admit it Qwerty, but I agree with you. Sorta. I only read ULTIMATES in trades, so I can't comment directly on Issue #8, but I also don't see the big deal with the aliens. They hinted at the tech in issue #1 (if I remember correctly, it was aliens or time travel, right?) so it shouldn't come as that big a shock, and, to tell you the truth, I never bought into the whole realism argument, even the one you present. Realism of character? You mean a US General who walks around snappin' his fingers and calling people "Daddy-o?", or a bunch of people sitting around talking about how they should be played in their movie by the movie stars they're drawn to resemble? Sorry. The characters have always been just as hyperbolized as their mainstream counterparts - the focus has just been different, and where the Marvel U's Avengers often have an exagerrated nobility, the Ultimates have an exagerrated state of deviance: Tony Stark isn't an alcoholic, he's Arthur; Hank Pym doesn't just strike his wife in a fit of rage, he beats the crap out of her and then attacks her with ants; Pietro and Wanda aren't just really (and suggestively) close, they're full on Children In The Attic, etc. *** Which doesn't mean that the book isn't an enjoyable read. I bailed after the go-nowhere first issue, but quite enjoyed the trade that I picked up. It's not great, but it's certainly an engrossing read - and I love his approach to both Thor and Captain America. Millar's no genius - he has the easiest job in the world and sometimes I wish he'd inject a little creativity and imagination into the proceedings (Scarlet Witch and Quicksilver & Incest? C'mon...who didn't see that coming a mile away. The creative take would be to make them like the Osmonds, or something different along those lines).
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All reviews should look exactly the same. HELL-O they're "reviews." They should start with a plot summary, then move on to praising/criticizing the writer, followed by praise or criticizm for the artist, and then an overall summation of how good/bad the book is. These are comic books, gentlemen...this is no place to be fucking around!!! Oh, and we should all wear tattered clothing, and walk around with our arms held out in front of us, and we should always speak in monotone and go "Brains. Braaaaaaaiiiinnnns."
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I'm confused on how Aliens being secretly behind the Nazi movement and waging a secret war against humanity in a comic book is Miller excusing Tyranny. Once again. WWII = real life. Marvel Comics WWII = Plot Device. Reality. Fiction. See the difference?
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Theres a BPRD trade coming out?
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Although you should be whipped and beaten for advocating any kind of Osbourne rip off (it'll start soon people, beware! It'll try to take us over, just like the Matrix did.) I agree with you somewhat, as well. Yes, the characters haven't been the main focus, but I do agree with some of the choices. Abusive people lose control, thats what domestic violence is. Abusive people and their relationships with super powers, well I'd hate to be a cop. And who hasn't played the "movie of my life" game. I have and let me assure you, I am not a member of a trillion dollar super human defense initiative, with the whole world watching me, I swear.
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Osmonds. Osmonds. I said 'Osmonds.' More later.
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.....based on the above reviews? Midnight Nation TPB sounds good as does the Crossovers. Thanks for the tips.
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I have to agree with Critical Bill. In fact, why don't you just give us the title and how many pages there are in the book because I don't like any creativity at all what so ever. I like my reviews just like every other review on every other web site. Who needs originality? Give me black and white, give me vanilla ice cream, give me wonder bread. I don't need your silly little stories. If I wanted humor, I'd go read Ziggy or Family Circus(although Cathy is a little risqu
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From Diamond Comics New Release List for this week: OCT020014 MIKE MIGNOLAS BPRD COLL TP $17.95. Could be late. Like I said, I haven't been to the store, but IN THEORY it should be available now. sk
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CORMORANT: I enjoyed reading your Catwoman review with its strong repudiation of the bleak, vulgar darkness DC has been flirting with in their mainstream titles. It's refreshing to note that there are *some* fellow fans who are still willing to draw the line in the sand, so to speak, and say "no further".....or to use popular comic book cliche-speak "This ends HERE!"....or going even further back, "I say thee NAY!" Yeah, others eat this kinda "Staring Into The Abyss" crap up, but I hope many more of us would just as soon see this kinda circus-freak show storytelling pack up its tent and get the hell out of town. Wasn't this the kind of voyeuristic snuff-show vomitus the Vertigo line is supposed to be pedaling?*********COMEDIAN: A masterfully administered ass-kicking to Millar's ULTIMATES, especially the wicked "P.S." to Hollywood. I started out a fan of this series, but my good-will is dropping off exponentially with each obscenely-delayed issue and the growing sheen of flop-sweat on Millar's ample forehead. Noting more disappointing (yet strangely satisfying and comforting) to see one of comics' cocky Golden Princes symbolically pissing his pants in stage fright by resorting to grim slacker-fantasy Matrix archetypes and tattered Mystery Science Theatre Sci-Fi cliches ("the aliens did it!"). Yeah...and the Wanda-Pietro incest angle has the fingerprints of smug calculation all over it, designed to add precisely 32.57% more Tradition-Flipping Outrageousness to Millar's Hollywood-baiting equations. Hats off to you, Comedian, for nailing this little %$#$#'s hide to the wall.******AMBUSH BUG: I dropped the DeMatties "Spectre" like last week's garbage only a few issues into the series. I'm an "undying" fan of the so-called "old school Spectre", with every bit of his A-bomb strength "Finale of Raiders of the Lost Ark" Wrath of God, Holy Mo-Fo attitude intact. Sadly, our kind, gentle, ecumenical times have neutered this once pants-crappingly terrifying Agent of Pure Outrage into a confused, inert dimwit...thanks to the efforts of Thoughtful Sensitive Fellas like J.M. DeMatteis and John Ostrander before him. In a comics field increasingly in love with edgy, uncomfortable characters and storylines (see Corm's CATWOMAN review), I've always found it strange that DC felt the need to scrub the Spectre character clean of his Anti-P.C., in-your-face edge and dress him up in the frilly sissy-boy clothes of non-judgemental New Age nitwittery. J.M DeMatties MAY be a talented writer, but his runs on both Superman and the Spectre (both the co-creations of Jerry Siegel, by the way) reveal that he's just not suited to writing the high-adventure, Superbowl-level storylines such characters require. Content to merely contemplate, meditate and wander through *concepts* rather than stories with a real sense of mission and direction, DeMatties just doesn't have what it takes to take on "the big boys" of superhero comics. Maybe ship him off to Vertigo if he'd like to continue his cosmic naval-gazing on some third or fourth-string character. Keep him the hell away from the Spectre. While we're at it, let's get Hal Jordan the hell away from the Spectre.******EVERYONE ELSE: Great reviews from everyone. I wish I had time to say a few words about each one, but I think I've already hogged enough space. THANKS!
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Good comic. #3 comes out this week. It's following in the tradition of the "Shadow of The Bat" series by focusing on other characters in Gotham: "GC" is on the police. The title draws inspiration from Miller's "Batman: Year One" and the T.V. shows "NYPD Blue", "Law & Order", and "CSI." Very solid opening: good drama, great "noir" feel, and it keeps with current continuity (Gordon has retired & Montoya is a detective.) Also they finally show that Mr. Freeze is using something very close to if not actually liquid nitrogen in that gun. And when he hits his target he does SEVERE damage. My only complaint is with the language. I understand if they can't say "fuck" or "shit", but not even "ass", "son of a bitch" or "pissed?" If you can't go PG-13 or R, don't have the "@#$&*!@" symbols in place of the cuss words. Timm and Dini did 9 years of stories and proved it can still work. My grade for "Gotham Central": B-----later-----m
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Jan 30, 2003 2:11:32 PM CST
Now, Guys 'n' Gals, Critical Bill Has A Point. Maybe I Am Not T
by buzz maverik
As you all know, I have a drug problem. I got thrown out of a rave in Long Beach last weekend because I was too stoned. So I may have my priorities a little mixed up here. Comic books and comic book reviews = serious stuff! Check! Gotta take 'em seriously! Let's see, if I move the economy, the fact that our country is about to go to war so Dubya-Skrull can have a legacy and for almost no other reason, the fact that I live near and work in the two U.S. communities voted least livable by USA TODAY and that I work with people whose lives are ruled by crime, drugs and violence due to grinding poverty and institutional racism...okay, I've got that all rearranged. Take the comic book crap seriously! Got it! Be serious when writing about the chick who dresses like a Fredrick's mannequin but fights like a warlord Tong! No more silly jokes about a billionaire who turns himself into an iron dildo with arms and legs. Checkerooni! What else should I take seriously? The guy in the rodent suit who fights the clown? How about those guys who look like storyboards for THE MATRIX but are realistic because it talks about 'em having sex and other grown up stuff like that? And all those books about those guys who are depressed because they were born with super powers? Well, I've been set straight and from here on out, I resolve to be a new and different Buzz Maverik. A serious Buzz Maverik. A responsible Buzz Maverik. A sober and drug free Bu-- hey, peyote! I forgot I had that! I'll see you in my visions!
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Jan 30, 2003 2:17:01 PM CST
Qwerty, I saw the Alien bit in #1 with the rocket Cap blew up...
by thecomedian
So I'm not complaining because about this storyline because I'm surprised. I'm complaining because it's lame. L-A-M-E. And I'm not one of those people whining because they clipped the wings of Cap's mask or that they've turned Thor into a pompous Nader/Rael hybrid. I don't mind any of that. I enjoy the book chiefly because it's such a bastardization of the Avengers that it's impossible to confuse it with the original. Secondly(and I think most fans of the book feel the same but they wont admit it to themselves) for Bryan Hitch's art. How well do you think this book would be doing if they'd reteamed Millar with his old Authority chum, Frank Quitely. Anyway, my real beef is when Millar goes on cynical, pretentious autopilot with the storylines. The storylines he does just wreak of hiper-than-thou smugness disguising itself as social commentary. And that's what really kills me about people who take this book seriously. They're actually buying into this pap as relevant realist commentary on Todays troubled times. When this book is LITERALLY nothing more than a pitch for a Jerry Bruckheimer produced/Tony Scott directed Avengers movie. But I think you're ALL missing the point of my review. ULTIMATE ULTRON SHOULD START OUT AS THE WASP'S SENTIENT HI-TECH VIBRATOR!!!! Now try getting the image of that little Ultron Head out of your brain. MUHUHUHUHUHAWHAWHAW!!!!!
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Your Iron Man Dildo joke is funnier than my Ultron dildo joke!
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Whatever -- I guess a bunch of you must be pissed off that Indiana Jones was duking it out with the Nazis...how dare they mess with history! You too, Indy! Maybe we should outlaw the use of Nazis in film to avoid ever portraying them innaccurately...give me a break.
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Glad to see that I'm not the only one pissed off about what Marvel has done to Thunderbolts and the sacrelidge that is Ultimate Marvel.
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For me, at least. Lazily written would be another description I'd use. The whole "alien conspiracy" has been done to death, and is sort of hokey in contrast with the realistic setup of the title. The Matrix rip-off, dull as dirt. And worst of all, the characters still only have shreds of personality. Nothing really happens in this book. Only little sequences or beats that really build to nothing. The promise of relationships between the characters developing has been left behind as more characters are introduced and there's a bunch of action where NOTHING REALLY HAPPENS. This is pretty art with lazy character development and clunker storylines. Ultimate War was even worse.
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Man, the Wizard Edge was great this year. It looks like there are gonna be some great books coming out this year. That Silent Devil ad was Schimmy. Those guys are nuts. Their website is pretty kick azz as well.
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Jan 30, 2003 3:05:28 PM CST
You're Too Modest, Comedian! Plus, I Hereby Launch A New @$$HOL
by buzz maverik
Your Ultron dildo joke is way funnier than my Iron Man dildo joke. 'Cause Ultron would be a sentient vibrator and he'd be the Wasp's sentient vibrator...Here's the contest: Tell us in 25,000 words or less which comic book characters look like dildos! Here's the prize: yeah, right, like there'd really be a prize, I'm so sure! Now the legalese: Talkback League of @$$holes and their families are forbidden to come within 100,000 yards of the Marvel Comics offices at 666 Yancy Street, NY, NY. Good luck! The winner could be you!
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The Cap villian Whirlwind.
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....and I use the term loosely. If your job is to review a comic, then why not do that? The other guys actually seem to be able to tell what's going on in the books and tell what jokes they want to tell at the same time. Is this beyond your capabilities, Buzz? Granted, not many folks come to this board novices, but if someone was looking for something new to read and thought about maybe reading the Birds of Prey trade - your "review" wouldn't have helped them a whole helluva lot, would it?
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Thank God there are other people out there who think that the Ultimates and the Ultimate War are TERRIBLE!!! First of all, whenever you pick up Wizard or read what other creators are reading, the Ultimates seems to be on everyone's list. I liked what Millar did on the Authority. I thought, for a while in the beginning, it was fresh and exciting. But as time wore on for that book, it became tired and honestly not all that interesting. His current effort in the Ultimates is starting to look like it's going that way too. Although the characters have some interesting problems, there has to be some standard bearer of normalacy. The trick, as others have pointed out here, can't be pure craziness in every aspect. Every character appears to have some sort of bizarre problem. Millar is a shock writer without a point to the shock value. His plots don't have tightly focussed directions but dangling points that just try and have the reader say "wow, that's screwed up!" Unfortunately, it takes forever for something, anything, to happen. And I hate that about comics today. Plot lines take forever to be fleshed out. Plus, the Ultimates isn't even always on time in shipping. I think Millar is an average writer whose reputation far exceeds his actual skill. Speaking of which, Ultimate War is one of the worst mini-series, three issues have gone by with nothing interesting going on. Pathetic. It seems that the only book that's really executing on a month in, month out basis is Ultimate Spider Man... all the others are showing a decline in quality. But... everyone keeps buying them.
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Osmonds, right. My bad. Sorry. Disregard my beating and whipping statement. ** Badass, a CHEAP plot device, eh? So then, Captain America himself would be a cheap character, right? after all, real people died in WWII, real men and women who sacrificed their lives in the conflict and having some pouncy, spandex clad clown nancin' around the front lines with just a shield cheapens their memories, right? Look, WWII is a great plot device, it was the a huge world changing event. Just like Nazis make the best bad guys. Cheap plot device? I say nay.
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I would love it if Frank Quitely reteamed with Miller since Quitely is one of the most interesting artists currently drawing. ** Gambit, you can't make any calls on quality on any book when you use the name of one of the dumbest characters ever created as your handle. C'mon, Pink Body Armor, what the fuck?
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I don't think Ultimates is any kind of relevant social commentary, I just think its fun. ** Also, spill fuckers! What did you all buy this week. I need to know exactly who's opinion I should be ignoring.
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Stuff I bought this week:
1. Superman, Man of Steel (last issue). Surprisingly good story featuring a rare appearance of the non-Nancy Girl Superman. 2. Avengers. Pick this UP! Great stuff, especially the Alan Davis artwork. 3. Captain Marvel #5 (haven't read it yet) 4. Flash (haven't read it yet....not expecting much, may be wrong) 5. Ultimate War #3 and.....that's it. Yeah, only four titles this week. I'm not like all of you "stack of 100 comics" jerks standing in front of me in line while the trained cashier-monkey takes 20 minutes to tally up your books. -
if you're into mythology, nazis and the occult I'd check it out. Seeds of Destruction collects the first 4 issues, but I like The Chained Coffin and Others which is a collection of stand-alone stories.
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Jan 30, 2003 5:53:46 PM CST
Thats alright, I only picked up four as well, bizarromark
by qwerty uiop
I can't read regular Avengers anymore, not to reopen that can of worms, but the whole BBQing in full costume thing they've got going on always weirded me out.
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Go out and buy them all. Its absolutely and completely worth it. I'm surprised to find someone who frequents this TB hasn't read it. And bonus, there's almost always extra pages in the trades, as well. Sure, sure some people may bitch that every Hellboy story amounts to Hellboy going to a castle, falling through a floor and then punching a monster and/or nazi, but to those people I simply say: fuck you. Anyway, go get them.
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I could more easily excuse all the script peddling star fucking rubber nipple suit incest, wife abuse and nurse eating if any of these characters were LIKABLE. The only one who presents even a remote rooting intrest is Cap, and he hasn't had anything to do since the Bucky angle. Thor's political bent is window dressing, Banners a psycho and the Wasp is an even more usless non entity than in mainstream continuity. Millar can't even do anythying interesting or funny with Hawkeye for christ sake!! Shock tactics can't replace solid storytelling so keep your smack addict gay space nazi's. Go read X-Statix for fresh takes.
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Poopybutt is much cooler than the rest of you. listen to the poopybutt, love the poopybutt, smell the poopybutt.
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...(and I use the term Critical Bill loosely) I write the kind of reviews that I would like to read if I was reading reviews instead of writing the reviews that you are reading...which I wrote. These are comic books, William! Com-ic bo-oks! I love comic books. I always have, I always will. But...as a reader, I don't want somebody telling me too much of what a book is about. That's why I read the book. And I don't care too much about what somebody else thinks about the quality of the book. What I really appreciate is an interesting perspective on the book, a new way of looking at the book, maybe an affectionate poke at something most of us have all thought about comics. If I'm going to bother reading a review, I like it to be interesting and fun by itself or I'll just go read a book or a comic or the label on a mouthwash bottle. And I'm going to especially be looking for something extra when I'm reading the review of a six year old trade paperback. Also, in the interest of promoting comics as a lifestyle (okay, an alternative lifestyle), I think that instead of merely regurgitating the plot of a comic and saying "Story good -- art purty" to a novice, it's more important to show that we comic fans have senses of humor about ourselves and the material. Too often, comic fans try to make comics look legitimate by flaunting the grimness and darkness of the comics. To me, that always comes off as a bunch of chubby, suburban white kids acting tough because they read WOLVERINE. Comic books are supposed to be fun! Again, when I read the review of a comic, if it's too serious and if the reviewer takes things too seriously, I'm outta there. If you don't like my reviews, that's cool. It's also cool that you complain about them. It won't do you any good, but it's cool. Besides, you had the wrong response. The correct response is...Marvel Universe Characters Who Look Most Like Dildos: a) The Silver Surfer and his surfboard...2)Charles Xavier...d)The Red Skull and *The Thing.
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I think Critical Bill's problem with your funny reviews, isn't that they're flip and don't take comics seriously, its because they're not funny.
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Jan 30, 2003 6:31:50 PM CST
I Like Qwerty's Idea Of Sharing What We've Bought & Read This We
by buzz maverik
for me...1)THE NEVERMEN: STREETS OF BLOOD # 1 --haven't read it but will review it for next time.2)BRATH PREQUEL -- don't have time to read comics straight through, so I'm about halfway done. A great book. 3)AGENT X # 7 -- the last Gail Simone written issue. Gail is the best and certainly the funniest writer working today. Evan Dorkin, who is also the funniest writer working today, will be doing some upcoming issues. 4)SUPERMAN VS. DARKSEID: APOKOLIPS NOW -- I have no idea why I bought this and wish I had the $2.95 plus tax back.
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Well, why didn't he say so in the first place? That's different.
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...or maybe even my last. I don't like the Ultimate line anyways, and have only been collecting this series because the art is good and the writing, while containing no real originality, has been ok. Basically, I've been buying it in spite of myself and my feelings.
Well, I've reached the end of my rope. Millar isn't creative. This whole Ultimates cock-up is nothing more than crap that is gussied up and put out for shock value. I almost dropped the book after Hank Pym's abusive scene with the Wasp, but stayed on board for some reason. Now, we find out that this is a setup for some ridiculous alien invasion story line? WTF? Screw this crap.
I MAY buy the next issue, just to see how the confrontation between Cap and Hank Pym goes, but that kind of purchase is probably what Marvel, Millar, et al., is banking one. I should, and just may, drop this book now, and put it out of my memory.
Hopefully, this Ultimate line BS will be nothing more than a bad memory in a year or so.
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I was reading comics before most of you were an itch in your Daddy's pants. I've seen the best, the worst, and every friggin idea rehashed a million friggin times.
Why the Gambit moniker? What can I say. Everyone clings to the characters that they can relate to the most. And that whole "not trusted by my peers for something bad that I did in my past" thing hit close to home.
Yeah the pink body armor has gotta go, but if the character was in the right hands there could still be many quality stories to tell.
I just hate to see good characters ruined by bad editorial decisions (don't get me started, the list is too long), and great characters repackaged for the kiddie audience when there's 40 years of continuity and history to a character and great things are happening in the core title. It's just not necessary to tell the same crap over and over again.
Old school rules, new school doesn't come close.
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First let me say that I do appreciate a response without the prerequisite internet flames. But I guess in short, you and I have a different meaning of the word "review". I have no problem with you trying to be funny.........I'll either laugh or I won't. No big deal. But, if I read a review and I leave it not knowing a damn thing more about the book that was reviewed than when I started, well then I wasted my time. Perhaps you could meet somewhere in the middle of "funny" and "informative".
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Jan 30, 2003 9:01:34 PM CST
Miller has an article on newsarama about the Superman Red Son bo
by superninja
Superman's a commie. I'll really be curious to see how Miller dresses this one up.
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Jan 30, 2003 9:42:47 PM CST
Bill - The TL@ works hard to establish an open dialogue with rea
by jonquixote
go fuck yourself. *** Aww, I'm kidding. You seem like a nice enough guy but you really need to lighten up a little bit and give that paradigmn that rules your roost a smack or two. But not every "review" needs to adhere to the same static formula; in fact, not every "review" needs to be a review. Bitching Buzz out for not conforming or doing what a "review needs to do" (thank you, by the way. How exactly does one go about getting that "arbitrer of all journalism" job that you occupy?) is like reading a Hunter S. Thompson travelogue and then whining that he doesn't tell you which hotel you should stay at when you go to Vegas. Suggestion: Go in expecting writing and not a chuck of cardboard criticism, then decide whether or not you like it. Judge it for what it is (unfunny or entertaining or subversive or interesting or dull) not for what you expect (or demand) it should be. If you insist on getting regular, by-the-numbers straight reviews every single time you read one, there are plenty of other sights that cater directly to people like you.
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Jan 30, 2003 9:43:50 PM CST
Bill - The TL@ works hard to establish an open dialogue with rea
by jonquixote
go fuck yourself. *** Aww, I'm kidding. You seem like a nice enough guy but you really need to lighten up a little bit and give that paradigmn that rules your roost a smack or two. But not every "review" needs to adhere to the same static formula; in fact, not every "review" needs to be a review. Bitching Buzz out for not conforming or doing what a "review needs to do" (thank you, by the way. How exactly does one go about getting that "arbitrer of all journalism" job that you occupy?) is like reading a Hunter S. Thompson travelogue and then whining that he doesn't tell you which hotel you should stay at when you go to Vegas. Suggestion: Go in expecting writing and not a chuck of cardboard criticism, then decide whether or not you like it. Judge it for what it is (unfunny or entertaining or subversive or interesting or dull) not for what you expect (or demand) it should be. If you insist on getting regular, by-the-numbers straight reviews every single time you read one, there are plenty of other sights that cater directly to people like you.
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"P.S. Millar, if you
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While I can't say I really agreed with Comedian's review of the Ultimates, I will say that Millar & Hitch's OBVIOUS Hollywood pandering certainly deserves criticism. Some of us DO find it stupid or annoying or even just plain pathetic - I personally consider it the *worst* part of the book. Nothing wrong with a paying customer telling them to pimp themselves to tinseltown on their own time.
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They can make him Italian....OH WAIT! They did that already, and it sucked. Nevermind. -NJM
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Jan 30, 2003 10:49:33 PM CST
"And that whole "not trusted by my peers for something bad that
by qwerty uiop
BWAH-HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH! Oh, stop, my sides.
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That is, without a doubt, the single funniest thing I have ever read. Thankyou for shining a little ray of hilarity into an otherwise mediocre day.
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How exactly are they pimping themselves? Fact is pop references in comics are traditionally atrocious and out dated...so much so that when someone outside the medium looks at them it creates nausea and an intense desire to ask why anyone over 13 who's getting laid is reading them (one issue that sticks out is John Byrne doing a Paula Poundstone joke in a She Hulk book that was picked up on Jay Leno and was extremely embarrassing to say the least...it was something along the lines of She Hulk smashing a boulder and saying "Look I'm Paula Poundstone" as if she hulk needed help looking stupid...hello her name is SHEHULK as in female version of the hulk...is there a Shesundown running around? Answer NO I F)*^ing shot the bitch) in any event usually comics are hopelessly outdated whereas Millers refs aren't (weren't when I read them a while ago) so at the worst it is a little goofing around so that if your average MTV-ites picks it up he can sorta indentify with it... As far as what this will get them- Marvel owns Avengers lock stock and 2 smoking barrels from Hawkeyes pubic hair to the Black Widows thongs...if this thing were bought they would get next to nothing and even if they owned it they'd still get next to nothing (that's Hollywood)...furthermore they could make all the pop references they want and it won't sell a script...they know this better than you...they stand to make nothing from it-- so instead of worrying about conspiracy theories just look at it from the point of view of two schlubs messing around doing comics for no other reason then they ENJOY doing them since their is no money in comics-- (oooh he's making 200 stinking bucks a page and the circulation is so low he ain't even getting any decent royalties...I bet most readers are doing better than the artists of most books)...so it might be annoying to you and your like-minded pals...maybe but nonetheless the rant Comedian gave about them running around in Hollywood sucking dick or whatever was way off base and the Comedian has LEFT THE REALM of paying customer to become a REVIEWER and as such it would be nice if off base pot shots could be omitted and left to the retards in the talkbacks...or did we learn nothing from the little incident with the writer of the Core...heh heh I'm still LAUGHING over that. It's a business and to think Hitch will get storyboarding work because of stupid pop references and NOT HIS OBSCENE TALENT and draftsmanship is just plain dumb. Hitch is good and could get that work if he wanted...its out there if you have even mediocre talent. In the end he has a right to an opinion but he is also off base and wrong in his assumptions...as in ass out of you and umption. Wow, long time since I ranted...felt goooood.
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...I just don't know what the hell to do with you. One minute you espouse knee-jerk conservative doctrine and unjustly trash Vertigo, which had a dark period for a while but was the most important thing to happen in mainstream comics in the last 15 years (yeah, they're 10 years old, but DC had some Vertigo books before they had Vertigo)and is now kicking mucho butt-o. Then you turn around and say things that are so close to my own opinions that I think I'm reading one of my own posts, except my spelling is better and my vernacular more profane. First we agreed about Waid on FF, and now it's SPECTRE. I mean, dear lord, why is DeMatteis allowed to write CHECKS any more, much less comic books? I, too, bailed on SPECTRE within half a dozen issues, and that's a character I've loved since I was a little kid. DeMatteis took an amazing, classic character--one that had remained strong and popular for, oh, 70 years or so--and completely wrecked it. The worst part is that he did it in the service of a story he's been telling for 20 years, over and over. From MOONSHADOW on, he's had new-agey tales of spiritual awakening full of broken, addicted people on a journey of self-discovery with the help of a wise if somewhat profane guide. WE GET IT, J.M--WE JUST DON'T FUCKING CARE. Tell your A.A. group, tell the uncle who molested you, tell your 50-year-old granola girlfriend--JUST STOP TELLING US. By the way, Mark, he DOESN'T belong telling this story at Vertigo--he already did that in the mid 90's with a shit series called THE SEEKERS. Hey, I said they had a dark period, remember? Anyway, back on point: DC allowed J.M. to absolutely ruin SPECTRE. I've given it a lot of thought, and honestly, I just don't know if it can be recovered from unless they just ignore it. After the "progress" the Spirit of Vengeance is supposed to have made, how can they go back to the creepy, scary, angry ghost who served as The Big Guy's enforcer? Damn. Where was I? Oh yeah. Way to go agreeing with me about some shit, but quit disagreeing with me about other shit. Got it?
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.........you're all wrong. The Marvel character that looks the most like a dildo is the Blue Bullet. Please see the cover of Invaders 11 if you don't believe me. Now, what did I win?
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I'm a pretty serious DC reader (acknowledging that every company has its mediocre titles), and it's the sort of thing that Marvel does with its series that has long turned me off to it. Millar is a crony of Ellis...obviously. And their "style" is a mixture of shock and deconstruction. Shock you with scenes unexpected at the expense of the integrity of established characters, and then use the shocks to deconstruct the idea of a "hero." It's a scenario that never changes, and that achieved a certain level of popularity with The Authority and has now been run into the ground. Blech.*** The reason I wanted to post, though, was in reaction to your Catwoman review (being that regular DC reader). Let me preface my thoughts by saying that the scene you reference caught me so off-guard that I had to jump back a page to make sure that what I thought was being done to her sister was, in fact, actually being done to her sister. I've got two conflicting reactions to it...one is that I feel it's the sort of villainy appropriate to the Batman books...all this time we've been given the impression that the villains of Gotham are particularly scary or insidious because they are so evilly twisted. And certainly this is an appropriate depiction of Black Mask, whose scary quotient and craziness were seriously amped-up during NML. My problem with it is that it's NOT appearing in a Batman title, where we get to see the ultimate upholder of justice, who sets vengeance and personal feelings aside to uphold a set of principles, but in the pages of Catwoman, where I, too, sense that it's going to be a situation of ever-escalating revenge. If Brubaker does NOT end it with some sort of act of major revenge, from the way he has built up Selina's character in this story, it will damage the integrity of the plot he put together and be wholly unbelievable. This is the sort of twisted evil I want to see Batman go up against...and within the context of Catwoman, it does feel VERY out of place, and hits that label of "gratuitous."
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just how eerily similar both Sundown and The Comedian's talkback "voices" are? It's like one of those "they hate each other but only because they can't see how right they are for each other" type dealies. Someone get Clooney on the phone, I've just come up with a great romantic comedy pitch. I think Hitch has his number.
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The T-bolts were the closest thing that Marvel had to a Sat. Serial. It consistently kept me on the edge of my seat, and it was always cool because of the fact that it operated in the rest of the Marvel Universe, using characters that most of us without a copy of "Marvel Universe Handbook" would easily forget. That was cool. Now, in typical Marvel fashion, it's getting a revamp. And unfortunately, it has to be compared to a Brad Pitt Movie to be "accessable" to fans? Moving on..
What the hell happened to the ULTIMATES? It had such a promising start, then it suddenly took a left turn at lame. My other huge problem with the book was that it took way too long to come out just to find out that after I read through it that the story only moved an INCH! I'm all for re-interpretations of characters and stories, but this is just a waste of time. And whoever said it was right, they're just aren't any likable characters in it.
I'm still a Marvel head, but I'm getting leary. What once was a house of ideas is now a house of idiots. Get it together guys, maybe you should hire Stan back. Excelsior! -
I have to disagree with Buzz. Lots of fun ideas, but the individual story threads are so disconnected that there's nothing to grasp onto. It's a set-up issue, riffing on pop-culture but not building on it. We all know they can build on it, but why not try to start it with a clever storyline? Concept lacking imagination.
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Jan 31, 2003 2:25:37 AM CST
Critical Bill Is Indeed Winning The Contest At The Moment.
by buzz maverik
Superninja would be winning but she is an official league member and therefore not eligible. I'm surprised nobody has mentioned Darkseid, because right now I'm looking at SUPERMAN VS. DARKSEID and dammit if Darkseid doesn't look kind of phallic...Good to see Sundown back in the talkbacks! Sundown is living proof that comic pros do read talkbacks and steal from them because one time, a few years back, he and I were calling each other names in the talkbacks and he mentioned a Hulk story that appalled me about a killer Hulk and dammit if BANNER didn't get announced soon after. For awhile, I was sure Sundown was Brian Azzarello but he's not. He should sue Marvel for 10 million! Like J.Q., I only read THE ULTIMATES in trades and I dug the hell out of the first trade but the two parts I despised were the part where they cast themselves (I'm sorry, Nick Fury would have no idea who Johnny Depp and Lucy Liu are. He'd probably have them investigated) and the fact that Fury was obviously Sam Jackson. Sam Jackson should be getting money from each ULTIMATE and Alan Ladd's heirs should also be getting dough because Captain America is Alan Ladd. Now, with Ultimate Hawkeye being Vin Diesil, they should be paying Vin too. I keep waiting for Ultimate Black Panther to show up, take off his mask and be Urkel.
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I appreciate the cool words.
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Jan 31, 2003 3:50:31 AM CST
Waitaminute, waitaminute, waitaminute - Ultimate Hulk is *EATING
by dave_f
I was skimming through this tangled mess of a TalkBack and that's what Fearsme suggests in his post. Can someone verify and give me the specifics? I remember Hulk talking about biting off Iron Man's head or something a few issues back in ULTIMATES, but I was hoping that was just a *threat*. Has he really gone cannibal? It's not like I'm buying the book anymore, but I do like to keep up on Mark Millar's Wheel of Depravity, just for old times' sake.
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Wow, I looked up CriticalBill's entry of the Blue Bullet for the contest, and he's definitely on to something. Being a nice guy, I even found a link to the relevant cover so TalkBackers can bring their own dildo-judgment: http://www.milehighcomics.com/cgi-bin/backissue.cgi?action=fullsize&issue=42725251514%2011 ****** Kinda shoots down my plans for a Stilt-Man entry: http://www.milehighcomics.com/cgi-bin/backissue.cgi?action=fullsize&issue=77906321824%20237
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I can't say I'd even want Black Mask's torture fetish to show up in the pages of Batman. I suppose it's an aknowledgment of the greying of the comics audience that anyone would even *consider* such a brutal scene being appropriate for a book in the DC Universe. But as open as I am to comics attempting anything you might find in prose, film, or TV, I'm fairly conservative when it comes to the DC and Marvel Universes *specifically*; I just don't think they're proper venues for all levels of adult themes. Complicating matters is my appreciation for a handful of books like ALIAS at Marvel and Alan Moore's SWAMP THING at DC - in-continuity books aimed at mature readers, but unquestionably set in continuity (and also extremely well-written). With ALIAS, I give it a pass because Bendis has largely presented the big heroes of the Marvel U. in a positive light during their guest appearances (Luke Cage being the notable exception...), and SWAMP THING gets a pass because it stepped further and further away from the DCU with each issue (until you eventually got HELLBLAZER, which surely is no longer considered to be in-continuity). But for the most part, I see Marvel and DC's superhero worlds as being venues for escapist thrills, and I'm not looking to have real world violence intrude to such degrees as happened in CATWOMAN. I also have problems with the crippling of Batgirl in THE KILLING JOKE (great story - shouldn't have been continuity), Sarah Essen's death in NO MAN'S LAND, and Karen Page's death at the hands of newbie Kevin Smith in DAREDEVIL. I think there are an infinite number of great superhero stories to tell without embroiling them in real-world misery. Beyond the Marvel and DC Universes, anything goes, but within them I have limits.
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Great turn of phrase from Bizarromark to describe the vintage Spectre. I was too young to read the 70's SPECTRE under Michael Fleischer, but I've read reprints and they're fairly chilling. My favorite bit (which I may be misremembering slightly) is the story where the Spectre creates spinning saw blades to carve up an evil, mannequin-like recreation of Jim Corrigan's girlfriend. The disturbing reveal: the Spectre had *no idea* the simulacrum was just that, and apparently had no qualms with carving up what he thought was his alter-ego's living, breathing love interest! Jesus! I'm reminded very much of the classic exchange from one of the SIMPSONS Halloween specials: "Dad, you shot the zombie Flanders!" "He was a zombie?" ******* If memory serves, it was Harlan Ellison's appreciation for Fleischer's twistedness that got him sued. Seems Fleischer was actually undergoing psychiatric evaluations or some such when he was writing THE SPECTRE, and when Ellison spoke glowingly of the title in an interview to the tune of, "This book is great! The writer's fucking nuts!", he took his comments *literally* and sued Ellison for libel! Amazing. If I recall correctly, the legal proceedings took a few years, but eventually Fleischer lost. ****** Now, here's the only problem with your post, Bizarro: you lump John Ostrander's generally *excellent* run on SPECTRE in with DeMatteis' poop-tacular stuff. Now it comes as no surprise that Ostrander's liberal attitudes don't rub you the right way, but man, you've GOT to give it up for his old-school take on the Spectre. Case in point: in the first issue, Spectre kills some drug dealers by first turning giant, then transforming them into his fingers (that is, waist-down they were his fingers, and waist-up were screaming drug dealers), and finally injecting his arm with a giant syringe filled with hellfire that burned them all to a crisp! Big fun, and he made Jim Corrigan a real hard-ass to boot! I lost track of the series around issue 30 or so, but I actually wish I'd stayed with it because I came back for the finale and it was excellent.
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Great choice for Punisher. It'd be great to see Liotta and Joe reuniting on the film too.
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actually I think the Comedian is a fine writer...BUT I think its been a while since you guys fought a good supervillain and maybe someone needs to throw him out a window (I hope someone gets that reference)...Point is I think maybe he went over a line and some a-hole should call him for it and I guess I am that a-hole...now let me go get my tin foil hat and blue cape and we can get down to business...
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I understand where you are coming from, I believe--certain characters and "worlds" should retain a certain degree of innocence and not be inflicted with that "gritty darkness" quotient. And I WOULD like to see a little more twisted behavior on the part of the villains in Batman, but even within a Batman book I'm not sure I would have wanted to SEE that particular scene played out. In any title, I think actually showing that scene in something that's not a MR title isn't cool--Batman should be fairly reader-friendly to my kid brother. On the other hand, the reader could be made aware he'd done some fairly horrible things without actually having to SEE it. Sort of like the difference between Hitchcockian terror, where the worst things occur offscreen as opposed to modern gore. I'd have to say I'm opposed to your dislike of the death of Sarah Essen or the crippling of Barbara Gordon. One of the things that I like about DC is that it's not afraid to really change its characters. Granted, in that mix we get the Death of Superman and Knightfall (an oft-maligned story, and undeservedly so, having once had the chance to talk to Denny O'Neill and hear why, in HIS opinion, they did that story), but we also get moments that permanently change their universe. It gives it an element of much-needed realism within the context of a comic book universe.
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Impossible Man.
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In Ultimate War issue 3, Magneto shuts down the power at the Triskelion (the Ultimates military base), and while he's punishing his children Pietro and Wanda for their betrayal, Ultimate Hulk escapes from his holding cell and eats the nursing staff. The back-up generators come on-line after only two minutes, and the gas knocks out Banner in no time, but still, six people (who treated him like shit, it should be mentionned) are eaten alive by the pissed-off big guy. But lets be real, here, the traditionnal Hulk killed a lot of people too, they simply didn't bother to show us the gruesome details, thats all. What, you thought that all those buildings that the traditionnal Hulk reduced to dust were always empty?
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In Ultimate War issue 3, Magneto shuts down the power at the Triskelion (the Ultimates military base), and while he's punishing his children Pietro and Wanda for their betrayal, Ultimate Hulk escapes from his holding cell and eats the nursing staff. The back-up generators come on-line after only two minutes, and the gas knocks out Banner in no time, but still, six people (who treated him like shit, it should be mentionned) are eaten alive by the pissed-off big guy. But lets be real, here, the traditionnal Hulk killed a lot of people too, they simply didn't bother to show us the gruesome details, thats all. What, you thought that all those buildings that the traditionnal Hulk reduced to dust were always empty?
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CORM wrote: "Now, here's the only problem with your post, Bizarro: you lump John Ostrander's generally *excellent* run on SPECTRE in with DeMatteis' poop-tacular stuff. Now it comes as no surprise that Ostrander's liberal attitudes don't rub you the right way, but man, you've GOT to give it up for his old-school take on the Spectre."********Yes, I can see it was a bit unfair to lump Ostrander's run on SPECTRE in with the DeMatties fustercluck, so thanks for the opportunity to separate the two a bit. You're correct in assuming the liberal drift that characterized much of Ostrander's run irritated me, but not enough for me to drop the title and drive me away screaming into the night....like the work of DeMatties did. In fact, I found aspects of Ostrander's Spectre entertaining enough that I stuck around for the *entire run* of the title. It didn't hurt to have most of that run include Tom Mandrake's spectacular interior artwork, which fit the mood of the book like a glove. The wide variety of cover artists was also a memorable, and (as far as I know) fairly unique, mark of Ostrander's Spectre. I would estimate at least 90% of the covers featured different artists, some of them well-known, accomplished artists from outside the comics biz. There were quite a few top-notch stories that I thoroughly enjoyed, chief among them a very moving WWII-era story that told of the beginning of Jim Corrigan's gradual detachment from his former humanity. I can't recall a single Spectre story that ever captured the tragic, forsaken "Jacob Marley" aspect of the character better than this single story. Let me know if you'd like the issue number and I'll get back to you. But most of the other stories took the character down a path that I just thought was misguided and, like a vollyball player "setting" the ball for another to spike, Ostrander's Spectre prepared the perfect "set" for New Age weenie DeMatties to spike. Hard. Granted, the Spectre characters are technically two different "base characters" (Corrigan and Jordan), but DeMatties' continuation (and amplification) of Ostrander's Judeo-Christian caricatures and Joseph-Campbell-style pantheistic cheerleading gives a similarity to the two approaches. Characters *constantly* question their faith, their mission, their identity. Heaven is usually populated by arrogant, clueless Catholic-medieval archetypes who are never quite as *enlightened* and *serene-cool* as their eastern-religion counterparts. Bleh.*******So, yeah....it's a bit unfair to tie Ostrander's work on Spectre too closely to DeMatties' spectacular mediocrity....but there's enough similarity to link the two approaches as a single path transforming to a once SINGULAR, primal character into a neutered, agnostic nebbish.
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Jan 31, 2003 1:42:34 PM CST
"Liotta is close to 45 and still in good shape. He could have be
by chasesequence
Right. Because he would have been fifteen when the war ended. (No argument that he'd be a good choice, but the Punisher-as-Vietnam-vet angle has got to go unless they either cast a 50-something or set it back in the early 80s. They should make him former special ops or something! Like infantrymen really have the kind of skill the Punisher is made out to have!)
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Microchip = Michael Moore. There's no other choice.
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I love the art and the design of the characters in general, but I'm not terribly impressed with the writing so far, particulraly on this last issue.
The Matrix ripoff was simply gratuitous. It wasn't an homage or a respectful nod, it was a blatant ripoff. Still, the artwork got me through it, as I looked forward to seeing each forthcoming panel.
Until the jump.
"Okay, I'm out of ammo, so here's the plan..." Millar didn't even try to hide the setup for the impossibly heroic leap-and-catch. There's too much cover for the choppers to help Hawkeye. Widow happens to run out of ammo. Why doesn't she grab a weapon from any of the three visible guards she passes in the hall?
Millar wanted to write that jump into the scene and he didn't even make the effort to make it seem necessary. It's insulting to me as a reader that he figures I'm so easy. As long as the art remains consistent I will continue to buy it, but I do hope the writing improves soon.
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I love the art and the design of the characters in general, but I'm not terribly impressed with the writing so far, particulraly on this last issue.
The Matrix ripoff was simply gratuitous. It wasn't an homage or a respectful nod, it was a blatant ripoff. Still, the artwork got me through it, as I looked forward to seeing each forthcoming panel.
Until the jump.
"Okay, I'm out of ammo, so here's the plan..." Millar didn't even try to hide the setup for the impossibly heroic leap-and-catch. There's too much cover for the choppers to help Hawkeye. Widow happens to run out of ammo. Why doesn't she grab a weapon from any of the three visible guards she passes in the hall?
Millar wanted to write that jump into the scene and he didn't even make the effort to make it seem necessary. It's insulting to me as a reader that he figures I'm so easy. As long as the art remains consistent I will continue to buy it, but I do hope the writing improves soon.
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I can see what you mean when you're asking for a little shielding for DC/Marvel books from certain themes. I can understand why, innocent little kids, blah, blah, blah, but TO ME, the lack of serious repercussions for a person wearing tights and fighting crime, seems like a pretty shallow well of stories. A lack of the type storylines where when the Villain says he'll kill you he actually means it, sounds to me like a big ol
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Jan 31, 2003 6:23:19 PM CST
LOOK AT ME! LOOK AT ME! BADASS and why the Fantastic Four are
by qwerty uiop
Yeah, see that was the point, BAUF. Cap doesn't cheapen the memory of WWII, but aliens do? Sounds like bullshit to me. ** It took me along time to figure just why exactly I've never really liked the FF (and conversely really dug The Four as the bad guys in Planetary) and it all has to do with Marvel Universe Superscience. Why doesn't Reed cure Cancer? Why don't the market their hover car tech? Or work for cheaper cleaner burning fuel? Every once in a while a new writer will touch on it and then forget? "Hey look, we found a new negative Zone." "Yeah, great news, stretch-o, now what about my kid with the brain tumor?" It always seemed to me like they were withholding their tech from the common man, that groups like the FF could do so much more for the world, if they just let people like Cap or Wolverine or Spiderman handle the slugfests and focused their own energies on elevating humanity. Grant Morrison should do more FF.
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I do go around calling myself Superman, but I NEVER stand around the office and chat.
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In regards to Cap, I think you're forgetting one important facet of his character, and that he was created during WWII as a propaganda book. The line in the first issue of Ultimates about how he's just for show was a reference to that fact. Cap IS a piece of real world WWII history, for good or ill. This whole aliens/Matrix Ultimates bit, however... No comment. ** As for the FF, I'd suggest you at least flip through the latest issue; it addresses the exact points you're complaining about. There was even a bit at the beginning of the Sentient storyline where Reed talks about his new PDA that taps into another dimention for memory storage, and how Sony paid him 3 mil. to NOT market it.
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Does that bit about the FF agree with me or disagree? Every writer takes their obligatory stab at the notion. Just why the hell wouldn
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Yeah Captain America is a piece of WWII history, in the real world, but the character is depicted in the comics fighting along the front line, which didn't actually happen, much like Aliens weren't actually behind the Nazi party, at least thats what they tell us....
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When it comes to Reed's statement, I just thought it was funny. As to your opinion, as I said, read the latest issue. It deals with Johnny licensing a company to produce garments made of unstable molecules, and what happens when his business partner tries to reverse engineer them.
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