Cool News
Elston Gunn's WEEKLY RECAP, plus Father Geek's recap of BUTT-NUMB-A-THON week
Father Geek here, nearly recovered from our annual BUTT-NUMB-A-THON 24 hour film fest, great fun as usual, of course many of the out of state attendees are still in town. This morning (Monday) at 9am Harry and I, and a few others saw GANGS OF NEW YORK, then lunched with a lovely Seattle guest on her way to Idaho, then visited with CABIN FEVER Director Eli Roth and Hercules the Strong in the AICN screening room, for a couple of hours while a couple of nympets danced around the AICN Compound , then 3 British fest attendees (2 English and a Scot) dropped by Geek Headquarters, then Moriarty and the LA crew along with Johnny Wad stopped in, then Tom Joad's group arrived and we all (12 of us) stuffed ourselves with great mountains of Italian food.
BUTT-NUMB-A-THON is really much more than the 24+ hours of the fest proper... For Harry and I it all offically started Thursday around noon... as Harry filled out the seating chart Tim League and I loaded the Alamo Roadshow Trailer will all the swag that had been building up here at Geek Headquarters over the pass few months to stuff our attendee's goodie bags: Posters (2 diff from "TTT", 4 diff from "Chicago", "Adaption", etc...); 700 tins of Penguins Caffeinated Mints; T-Shirts ("Goldmember", "Simone", "Rush Hour", "Jason X", "Adaption", etc...); 300 cans of Starbucks doubleshot - Expresso & Cream; Ball Hats (Dragonfly, Jason X, Mummy Returns, Rush Hour 2, Erin Brockovich, Goldmember, etc...); "Jason X" Masks; "Barbwire" and "Mummy Returns" keychains; "Jackie Brown" and other DVDs; "Adaption" Coffee Mugs; "Rules of Attraction" door signs and bookmarks; "Far From Heaven" pot holders; "8 Femmes" ballpoint pins; newly reissued CD's from "Reanimator", "Zulu Dawn" and others (some autographed); Magicwands from Roy D. Tolkien you-know-who's-grandson; "Clay Pigeons" frisbees; plus tons more coolness, annnnnnnd BNAT T-shirts & Posters to boot. No sooner had that ended than people started showing up here at the AICN Screening room in the Geek Headquarters Compound... including West Coast Editor Moriarty, Hercules the Strong, Harry Lime, and others. We told tall tales of film going experiences and then Harry and I broke out our Mint condition 16mm Scope print of "The Empire Strikes Back" (original release) and we all tripped to a place far, far way.
Friday Harry and I awoke early and headed down to the Alamo to stuff the 250 giftbags for the BNAT guests. We arrive to find Rav, Quint, Auntie Meat, Massawurm, and approx a dozen other local Boils and Ghouls rolling the 1000+ posters we were to give away and stuffing them in our BNAT shipping tubes. (not an easy task, as the 10 papercut fingers attested) A little later the West Coast Crew showed up doubling our forces and we spent the next 5 hours sorting the swag into bags. Just as this all wound down the "Minn.-St. Paul Dozen" burst into the Alamo to help wrap things up. Harry and I headed off to eat at HUT'S, a 70 year old Austin Hamburger joint and we found ourselves seated next to Rene from Manchester, England and two other Brits, then before our food could arrive 2 guests from Seattle wandered in, then the "Minn. Dozen" showed up and BNAT took the place over, all by simple chance. That night ol'Father Geek built a roaring Bondfire at the Geek World Headquarters Compound to brace us all against the 38 degree cold and about 50 Buttnumbers (off and on) partied the night away. After all had left (many of the more adventurious trekked over to Annette Kellerman's new abode near Geek Headquarters) John Robie and others from the West Coast showed up knocking on the door (approx 1:30 am).
Well Father Geek here awoke at 7am Saturday morn and started picking up the 100 or so Shiner Bok bottles that decorated the compound, oh, there was more... empty Merlot bottles, and bottles of that world famous Black Irish Brew lay among the night's ruins. 9 bottles of Shiner and 1 and 1/2 bottles of Merlot survived the BNAT onslought. Then it was off to the fest... There were several campers (some since Thursday) waiting for standby tickets (they all got in) there to greet us when we arrived at the Alamo. I'll not talk of the fest itself, others will be doing that, but this years fest had attendees from across ye olde British Empire: India, New Zealand, Scotland, Canada, and England were represented. We had guests from Chicago, Seattle, Atlanta, Denver, and Louisville, Kentucky. They came from Iowa, Kansas, Oklahoma, Nebraska, Minnesota, California, Arizona, New York and New Jersy, from Idaho, North Carolina, Alabama, and Louisiana. Annnd we all had a ball!
Annnnnnd now... Now I sit here posting up our regular weekly report from Elston... Trying to slip back into my regular life here at World Geek Headquarters... Of course, SOME of the BNATers' planes don't take off till late Tuesday afternoon sooooooooooooo... Oh Yeah, Harry and I have a back to back double feature of FELLOWSHIP OF THE RINGS and THE TWO TOWERS Tuesday night starting at 9pm at the Alamo North (Just a few blocks from Geek Headquarters), we'll be revisiting many local BUTT-NUMB-A-THON members there, and maybe a few out-of-towners.
The WEEKLY RECAP...
TAKEN FROM VARIETY AND HOLLYWOOD REPORTER
CASTING
Friday Harry and I awoke early and headed down to the Alamo to stuff the 250 giftbags for the BNAT guests. We arrive to find Rav, Quint, Auntie Meat, Massawurm, and approx a dozen other local Boils and Ghouls rolling the 1000+ posters we were to give away and stuffing them in our BNAT shipping tubes. (not an easy task, as the 10 papercut fingers attested) A little later the West Coast Crew showed up doubling our forces and we spent the next 5 hours sorting the swag into bags. Just as this all wound down the "Minn.-St. Paul Dozen" burst into the Alamo to help wrap things up. Harry and I headed off to eat at HUT'S, a 70 year old Austin Hamburger joint and we found ourselves seated next to Rene from Manchester, England and two other Brits, then before our food could arrive 2 guests from Seattle wandered in, then the "Minn. Dozen" showed up and BNAT took the place over, all by simple chance. That night ol'Father Geek built a roaring Bondfire at the Geek World Headquarters Compound to brace us all against the 38 degree cold and about 50 Buttnumbers (off and on) partied the night away. After all had left (many of the more adventurious trekked over to Annette Kellerman's new abode near Geek Headquarters) John Robie and others from the West Coast showed up knocking on the door (approx 1:30 am).
Well Father Geek here awoke at 7am Saturday morn and started picking up the 100 or so Shiner Bok bottles that decorated the compound, oh, there was more... empty Merlot bottles, and bottles of that world famous Black Irish Brew lay among the night's ruins. 9 bottles of Shiner and 1 and 1/2 bottles of Merlot survived the BNAT onslought. Then it was off to the fest... There were several campers (some since Thursday) waiting for standby tickets (they all got in) there to greet us when we arrived at the Alamo. I'll not talk of the fest itself, others will be doing that, but this years fest had attendees from across ye olde British Empire: India, New Zealand, Scotland, Canada, and England were represented. We had guests from Chicago, Seattle, Atlanta, Denver, and Louisville, Kentucky. They came from Iowa, Kansas, Oklahoma, Nebraska, Minnesota, California, Arizona, New York and New Jersy, from Idaho, North Carolina, Alabama, and Louisiana. Annnd we all had a ball!
Annnnnnd now... Now I sit here posting up our regular weekly report from Elston... Trying to slip back into my regular life here at World Geek Headquarters... Of course, SOME of the BNATers' planes don't take off till late Tuesday afternoon sooooooooooooo... Oh Yeah, Harry and I have a back to back double feature of FELLOWSHIP OF THE RINGS and THE TWO TOWERS Tuesday night starting at 9pm at the Alamo North (Just a few blocks from Geek Headquarters), we'll be revisiting many local BUTT-NUMB-A-THON members there, and maybe a few out-of-towners.
The WEEKLY RECAP...
TAKEN FROM VARIETY AND HOLLYWOOD REPORTER
CASTING
Annnnnnd now... Now I sit here posting up our regular weekly report from Elston... Trying to slip back into my regular life here at World Geek Headquarters... Of course, SOME of the BNATers' planes don't take off till late Tuesday afternoon sooooooooooooo... Oh Yeah, Harry and I have a back to back double feature of FELLOWSHIP OF THE RINGS and THE TWO TOWERS Tuesday night starting at 9pm at the Alamo North (Just a few blocks from Geek Headquarters), we'll be revisiting many local BUTT-NUMB-A-THON members there, and maybe a few out-of-towners.
The WEEKLY RECAP...
TAKEN FROM VARIETY AND HOLLYWOOD REPORTER
CASTING
TAKEN FROM VARIETY AND HOLLYWOOD REPORTER
CASTING
* Jude Law and Gwyneth Paltrow will star in the sci-fi thriller THE WORLD OF
TOMORROW for writer/director Kerry Conran. Production begins in late
February in London. The project is described by the producers as "retro
sci-fi" in the vein of RAIDERS OF THE LOST ARK. It's set at the turn of the
20th century, it follows a reporter and pilot who team up on an adventure.
* Alec Baldwin is in talks to star opposite Matthew Broderick in PROVIDENCE
for Disney and writer/director Jeff Nathanson. The project was inspired by
the true story of a sting operation in Providence, R.I. It centers on a
young filmmaker who is given millions of dollars to make his first movie by
a mysterious benefactor he eventually discovers is an undercover FBI agent.
* Adam Sandler will star in 50 FIRST KISSES, which will start shooting in
the spring. Sandler will play a man who falls in love with a woman after a
memorable encounter. However, he discovers that she suffers from severe
short-term memory loss and has no idea who he is. To win her, he must get
her to fall in love with him all over again every day. Drew Barrymore is in
talks to join the cast.
* Mark Ruffalo is in final talks to join Jim Carrey, Kate Winslet and
Kirsten Dunst in ETERNAL SUNSHINE OF THE SPOTLESS MIND, written by Charlie
Kaufman, for director Michel Gondry (HUMAN NATURE) and Focus Features. The
project takes place in the recesses of the human brain and centers on a man
who tries to erase a particularly steamy relationship he had with an
ex-mate. Ruffalo will play a lab technician involved in the memory-erasing
procedure.
* Matthew Perry will star in the indie drama FEVER, opposite Robin Tunney,
for film editor Mia Goldman who is making her directorial debut on the
project from her own script. It's about a couple who are shocked out of the
predictability of their relationship by an event that challenges them to
either love more deeply or lose each other for good.
* Cheri Oteri joins the cast of New Line's WHEN HARRY MET LLOYD: DUMB &
DUMBERER, starring Eric Christian Olsen and Derek Richardson. She'll play
Ms. Heller, a high school cafeteria worker who poses as a special ed teacher
in the prequel to the 1994 blockbuster comedy. Troy Miller directs from a
script by Robert Brener.
* James Woods and Christian Slater will star in the indie drama FAIRHOPE,
USA for director Harold Becker. Anthony Di Pietro wrote the script about a
convicted sex offender who moves to a small town to live in obscurity after
his release from jail. However, when legally forced to register with the
police, the entire town quickly learns of his past and he is exiled from the
community and local church. When a compassionate pastor decides to minister
to him privately, tensions escalate and convictions are tested.
* Tom Hanks will star in THE LADYKILLERS, a remake of the 1955 black comedy,
for the Coen Brothers. He'll play an eccentric Southern professor who puts
together a gang of double-crossing thieves to rob a riverboat casino. They
rent a room in an old woman's house, but when she discovers the scheme,
somebody has to kill her - a tougher job than it would seem. Production is
set for next summer in L.A., with additional shooting along the Mississippi
River.
* Seann William Scott is in final talks with Paramount to star in the
romantic comedy TINY BOYFRIEND about a self-absorbed young man who is
accidentally shrunk to a few inches in height.
* Mel Gibson will star in FURY ROAD, the fourth installment of the MAD MAX
franchise, for 20th Century Fox and writer/director George Miller, who has
been working on the script for the last three years. The project will begin
shooting in Australia next May.
* Regis Philbin, Jim Belushi and Eric Idle join Breckin Meyer, Glenn Close,
Queen Latifah, Kevin James, Eddie Griffin, Topher Grace, Cheech Marin and
David Suchet in voicing the English dub of Miramax's PINOCCHIO, directed by
and starring Roberto Benigni.
* Nia Vardalos will star in the music-driven buddy comedy CONNIE AND CARLA,
which she scripted, set for an April start. It's about two working-class
dinner theater singers who are forced to go undercover in Los Angeles as
drag queens.
* Sophie Marceau, Vincent Perez and Charles Berling will star in Diane
Kurys' JE RESTE (I'M STAYING) about a love triangle between a businessman,
his wife and the writer/intellectual she falls in love with. The screenplay
was penned by Florence Quentin (LIFE IS A LONG QUIET RIVER).
* Sylvester Stallone is near a deal with MGM to write, star in and produce
ROCKY VI. The new installment will return the franchise to its indie-style
roots, with hopes of a $10 million-$15 million budget range. The story would
find Rocky as a 50-year-old who is now at work running a youth center. He is
lured out of retirement from the ring for one last fight.
* Mo'Nique is in talks to star in PHAT GIRLZ for Screen Gems and producer
Todd Black. Negest Likke wrote the urban comedy.
DIRECTOR/WRITER ATTACHMENTS
* Mike Mitchell will direct the superhero comedy SKY HIGH, written by Paul
Hernandez, for Disney and Gunn Films. It's about a high school for the kids
of superheroes.
* Crossroads Films has hired Peter Speakman and Michael M.B. Galvin to adapt
the upcoming Charles Huston novel CAUGHT STEALING. The dark comedy focuses
on a failed baseball player who makes a big mistake when he agrees to a
weekend of cat-sitting for his sexy neighbor. Crossroads is also developing
MCGOORTY, a period drama that follows the 40-year career of professional
pool hustler Danny McGoorty.
* Callie Khouri's is attached to direct three upcoming projects: the
recently acquired dramedy HOT MONEY for MGM, the NASCAR biopic UNTITLED
PETTY PROJECT for Disney and the UNTITLED CHARLIE PETERS PROJECT for Strike
Entertainment. The newest project, HOT MONEY, is a dramedy based on a
British telefilm about the true story of three women who worked as a night
cleaning crew in the British Treasury and managed to skim money from the
department before it was incinerated. The women then used the money for
charitable causes.
* DreamWorks Pictures is in talks with director Gore Verbinski and scribe
Ehren Kruger to return for a sequel to THE RING.
* Disney bought the pitch FOURTEEN FEET by Andrew Ungvari, who'll write the
script, about the true story of a coach who used football to rehabilitate
troubled kids in Texas. The studio has secured life rights to Sandy Brown,
whose coaching of a football team at a juvenile hall gave the kids pride and
something constructive.
* Bob Edwards will rewrite Revolution Studios' psychological thriller
PERFECT STRANGERS, which Julia Roberts' Red Om Films is producing. The
project is set in the world of the internet.
* Warner Bros. Pictures grabbed the script THE COLLEGE EXPERIENCE, written
by Dax Shelby and Robert Stevens, about a Brentwood socialite who gets a
rude awakening when she finds herself newly divorced and broke and is forced
to return to college.
* Computer graphics facility Rhythm & Hues Studios (BABE) has optioned the
fantasy comedy script BLOND WARRIOR from writer Steve Rayvler Greenberg.
The story is set in the mythical land of dragons and ogres and centers on an
elderly warrior who leads a ragtag band of misfits into battle with a
man-eating though dapper giant in order to save a beautiful princess.
* Stephen Daldry (BILLY ELLIOT, THE HOURS) is in negotiations to direct THE
AMAZING ADVENTURES OF KAVALIER & CLAY for Paramount, based on the Pulitzer
Prize-winning novel by Michael Chabon. The project deals with the birth of
the comic book industry intertwined with the Jewish experience during World
War II. Chabon also penned the adaptation. Daldry is also attached to an
adaptation of Jonathan Franzen's THE CORRECTIONS, which is being adapted by
David Hare (THE HOURS).
* Steve Martin is bringing to the big screen TRAITOR, a suspense thriller
based on his own idea that Jeffrey Nachmanoff is now scripting. Martin is
executive producing for the Walt Disney Co. and Mandeville Pictures. The
plot line is being kept secret but is described as a topical, politically
relevant story dealing with international terrorism and U.S. traitors.
* Gary Goddard and Ty Granaroli have penned SOLDIER BOY, based on Joseph
Anthony's 1960 autobiographical book THE RASCAL AND THE PILGRIM, with
Goddard attached to direct for Electric Entertainment and Landmark Global.
It's the true story of an orphaned boy in Korea who, after witnessing
atrocities inflicted on his country during the war, ingratiates himself to
American soldiers who help him get to the U.S., where he is adopted and
begins a new life.
* The Doors' Ray Manzarek (LOVER HER MADLY) will direct the indie pic RIDERS
ON THE STORM, with Brad Renfro, Edward Furlong and Peter Stormare in
negotiations to star. The script, written by Manzarek, Chris Kobin and Tim
Sullivan, follows three UCLA film students who embark on a road trip to New
Mexico in search of enlightenment. In the process, they come face to face
with their own demons.
* Neil Burger (INTERVIEW WITH THE ASSASSIN) will direct the caper pic
AIRTIGHT, set in Florida, for Castle Rock Entertainment and producer Mike
Lobell. Tony and Joe Gayton wrote the script which is being geared to start
production in mid-2003. Burger is also attached to direct the studio's'
ANIMAL ATTRACTION, a romantic comedy about two zoologists who fall in love
at the Washington, D.C. zoo while trying to mate two giant pandas.
* Martin Scorsese will direct Leonardo DiCaprio in THE AVIATOR, a film about
the early life of Howard Hughes. Miramax Films is teaming with Warner Bros.
and Initial Entertainment Group to finance the $100 million-plus project.
Shooting will begin May 12 in Los Angeles for likely release in fall 2004.
The script begins as a young Hughes directs one of Scorsese's favorite
films, HELL'S ANGELS. The story ends in 1946, when Hughes was still a
dashing young man and romancing actresses like Eva Gardner and Katharine
Hepburn. John Logan penned the script, which was owned by Michael Mann
until he decided to step aside.
MISCELLANEOUS PRODUCTION TIDBITS
* Producer Scott Rudin has resigned as producer of LEMONY SNICKET'S A SERIES
OF UNFORTUNATE EVENTS, the Paramount/Nickelodeon Films adaptation of the
bestselling Daniel Handler book series. Rudin set up the project to be
directed by Barry Sonnenfeld and star Jim Carrey. Handler wrote the script.
Rudin exited in a disagreement over budgets and fees. The first film is
to shoot next year.
* Twentieth Century Fox has pulled out of its co-production with Universal
Pictures on Baz Luhrmann's historical epic ALEXANDER THE GREAT, with
DreamWorks Pictures stepping in as a partner. Leonardo DiCaprio remains
attached to star in the title role, while Nicole Kidman has expressed
interest in playing Alexander's mother, Olympia. Martin Scorsese, who had
been developing his own "Alexander" project, will executive produce with
Dino and Martha De Laurentiis. Production is set to begin at the end of
next year.Until next week.
Elston Gunn
elstongunn@hotmail.com
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+ Expand All
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would you rather have a conversion van or a motorcycle? i'd take the van. think of the possibilities.............
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Dec 17, 2002 2:15:18 AM CST
NUTS TO THE BUTT NUMB A THON!!! HOW THE HELL COULD HERC MISS A M
by zod_is_back
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Glad for an update.
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Stallone... I don't even know what to say to you at this point. GRANTED, I'm gonna give you credit for wanting to work with only $10-15 million. But who is gonna BELIEVE that Rocky would go into the ring ONE LAST TIME?! Stallone looks like the material his gloves are made of. Here's the only chances that this movie will be good: 1) ROCKY DOES NOT FIGHT. That's right, he doesn't fight... he trains a guy and stays as the TRAINER. 2) HE LOSES THE FIGHT. That's what happened in Rocky, and that film was GREAT. Alas, I'm done spewing hot air... for now...
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Dec 17, 2002 3:03:17 AM CST
"and will end in 1946 while Hughes was still a dashing young man
by jimmy jazz
Yawn. The REAL Howard Hughes story begins in the fifties, when he was using RKO as his own personal Bordello, running TWA to the ground and slowly transforming into the Morphine addicted, paranoid, neurotic weirdo that made tongues wag for nearly three decades. A proto-Michael Jackson, if you will.
Then again, all that sensationalistic stuff has been pretty much been hashed over in various forms for many years. Perhaps Scorsese felt that Hughes' lesser known years as a Renaissance man/playboy was more of a challenge than the lurid melodrama of his latter years. Any halfway competant TV movie director could do that stuff and make it interesting. Hmmmmm....We shall see. In Marty we trust. -
BOMB IN RIBCAGE!
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I would just as soon it not be remade, in that it's really a quintessentially British black comedy. I have no doubt that the Coens can do something interesting with it, although I don't know whether Tom Hanks has been in a black comedy (the 'Burbs?, maybe). I mean, the original had Alec Guinness, Peter Sellers (first major movie, I think), and Herbert Lom. Quite a different task than Soderbergh remaking Ocean's 11, whose originally wasn't by any means a classic. Put me down as iffy on this project.
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... is the James Ellroy version. Someone make a movie out of the Cold Six Thousand or American Tabloid or ANY of them. That'd be good stuff. And Sly, buddy, dude - hang 'em up. Just stop before you embarass yourself further. You impressed us with Copland, and have made shit since then.
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Just...fucking...stop...
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If it doesn't have Balki and Cousin Larry, I'm not interested!
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More like Riders on the Bullshit. I mean really, for how long can one person cash in before spontaneously combusting?
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Dec 17, 2002 9:45:35 AM CST
I thought they decided to film Mad Max IV in Africa instead?
by rev_skarekroe
Where did I read that? Darkhorizons? sk
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The Ladykillers is my favourite British film. It's a perfect, sparkling black comedy, which I don't think could be improved. It has the best third act of any film I can name. Beautifully cast, and the photography of Mrs Wilberforce's house is just marvellously crooked. I would urge all Geeks to watch the original. PLEASE. PLEASE, I beg of you.
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Tiny Boyfriend? 50 First Kisses? Coen Bros. succumbing to the "remake" bug? Connie and Carla? Martin Scorsese directing a movie written by John Logan, one of the two primary reasons that Star Trek Nemesis sucked (Stuart Baird being the other)? Every time I read these things, I just have to shake my head in disbelief at how much total shite somehow manages to be greenlit. The only good news in here was Ruffalo joining the cast of The Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind... now that's shaping up to be something potentially good.
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Blow it dead.
PROVIDENCE: Alec Baldwin and Matt Broderick for Disney... lemme see, Baldwin plays the FBI agent and Broderick the young director, right. Oh yeah, that's gonna be real cool. Pshaw.
50 FIRST KISSES: Sounds like someone watched Memento and thought... "Hey, this would be kind of neat if it didn't go backwards and it was a romantic comedy with Adam Sandler and Drew Barrymore."
FEVER: Matthew Perry in an indie drama? Robin Tunney of Supernova fame? No thanks.
WHEN HARRY MET LLOYD: Quite possibly the most unbearable bit of news that I have ever read.
FAIRHOPE, USA: So does Christian Slater, the priest, try to rape James Woods? Otherwise, this movie will be a bore.
THE LADYKILLERS: I don't care if you are the Coen Bros., in fact, you're the Coen Bros., that's all the more reason for you to be using your talents for something original and not remaking a movie that does not need to be remade. Especially if Tom Hanks is gonna star.
TINY BOYFRIEND: What the hell, what the hell, what the hell, how does this get made? Why, God, why?
FURY ROAD: There's about a 40 percent chance that this will be decent. More likely it will be a tired rehash with tired creative talent trying to recapture some dying spark of past glory.
PINOCCHIO: You know, the original version of this movie might be okay, but let's take a look at some of the voices in the dub cast... Regis Philbin, Jim Belushi, Eddie Griffin, Topher Grace, Queen Latifah, FRICKIN' CHEECH MARIN dubbing a Roberto Benigni film? Ridiculous.
CONNIE AND CARLA: From the mastermind who brought you "My Big Fat Greek Wedding" comes a hilarious romp of undercover drag queens in L.A. Yeah, fantastic.
JE RESTE: "Sophie Marceau, Vincent Perez and Charles Berling will star in Diane Kurys' JE RESTE (I'M STAYING) about a love triangle between a businessman, his wife and the writer/intellectual she falls in love with." So basically it's along the lines of just about every other French movie ever made. Where's Truffaut when you need him?
ROCKY VI: Nuff said.
PHAT GIRLZ: The kind of movie that intelligent black people apologize for.
SKY HIGH: All the kids think they are superheroes because they're "sky high" on pot. Once again, thank Disney for raping the youth of the world.
CAUGHT STEALING and MCGOORTY: Suck!
HOT MONEY: Oh my motherfragheyaaaa....I spit upon this movie with righteous indignation.
THE RING 2: Can we say "terrible idea"?
FOURTEEN FEET: So touching it should just back off and go away.
PERFECT STRANGERS: Sounds like some cheesy stalker movie translated into Internet cat-and-mouse games. Cute young woman types: "We should meet sometime." Pause. CU of computer monitor as the letters appear slowly: "We already have." CU of confusion and fear on young woman's face. Julia Roberts producing. Yeah, this will suck the scales off a snake.
THE COLLEGE EXPERIENCE: Hahaha, the only potential I see in this one is the middle-aged woman ending up at some kegger and then getting wasted... next morning she wakes up on the couch with her son on top of her. They both scream. Woman kills herself with a heroin needle lying on the coffee table. Son hugs the nearest homosexual. Cut to black with big bold red letters: "THE COLLEGE EXPERIENCE." Oh, haha, sweet Mary, who are the rich suits who see potential in this crap?
BLOND WARRIOR: Hey, Shrek was popular! Let's make something rather similar!
TRAITOR: How can I take this seriously? We're talking about "The Jerk" here.
SOLDIER BOY: I smell sap.
RIDERS OF THE STORM: Probably makes a good movie to watch if you're a grad student that likes to get high then watch movies with drunk buddies.
ANIMAL ATTRACTION: Trying to mate pandas is such a turn-on! Let's procreate for the survival of our species!
THE AVIATOR: From the director of Taxi Driver and Raging Bull and the writer of Bats and Star Trek: Nemesis...
Precisely two movies in here look like they might be really good. The Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind and The Adventures of Kavalier and Clay.
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For anyone who reads these updates and think its doesn't get any worse, might I remind you all, my brothers, that there is going to be a GLADIATOR 2.
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Correct me if I'm wrong, but wasn't Hughes essentially just an eccentric rich person? With all due respect to Scorsese, why exactly is so much money needed for a biopic? Especially for one that only covers a short time in his life?
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Nic Cage has signed on to play the King in TINY ELVIS for Paramount.
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How in the hell did they lure Mel Gibson back to Mad Max? I mean, I can appreciate the whole tribute-to-your-roots feel of it, but I thought he had put the big nix on that and they were trying to get Heath Ledger.
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