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NORM Coughs Up THE TRUTH ABOUT CHARLIE!! Is It Really A
Hey, everyone. "Moriarty" here with some Rumblings From The Lab.
I wish I had something in my inbox to counter the literal wave of bad reviews we’ve had for this film. But I don’t. Instead, we’ve got Norm, our man in Montreal, with another stunned reaction to what is shaping up as one of the worst-reviewed films so far this year...
THE TRUTH ABOUT CHARLIE
Ohmygod, this is awful. AWFUL, I tell you! This makes the short-list of the worst studio productions I’ve ever seen. Who knew Jonathan Demme had such a craptasterpiece in him? This is the director of "Philadelphia" and "The Silence of the Lambs", stooping to the level of mediocrity generally reserved to the likes of Paul Anderson and Simon West.
A remake of Stanley Donen’s "Charade", "The Truth About Charlie" stars Thandie Newton in the Audrey Hepburn role of a young widow who learns that her husband was a crooked secret agent who snatched a 6 million dollar loot during a mission. This cost him his life, and now the killers are after Newton, whom they believe has the money, even if she doesn’t know it. Enters Marky Mark Wahlberg (standing in for Cary Grant), a mysterious stranger looking to a) help a damsel in distress, b) get into her pants, c) find the money for himself, d) all of the above and even more incomprehensible layers.
Demme keeps showing the Eiffel Tower to remind us that the film is set in Paris, and maybe to justify how shockingly amateurish his direction is by passing it off as a misguided French New Wave homage. Every scene is shot with a shaky handheld camera, and sometimes it’s cheap-looking digital video as well. The sets are awful (a federal agent’s office has only a piece of paper with his name on the door), the dialogue is so bad that it might have been improvised and the acting is rotten all around.
Thandie Newton wanders around with a deer-in-the-headlights look, every bit the dumb bimbo character, alternating between wide-eyed giddiness, whining, screaming and bending down so we can see down her blouse. She has zero chemistry with Mark Wahlberg, who’s ridiculous on his own wearing a beret, taking off his shirt for no reason and changing identity every half hour. Also embarrassing themselves are Tim Robbins as an American federal agent, Lisa Gay Hamilton, Ted Levine and Joong-Hoon Park as the Three Stooges of the paramilitary and plenty of obnoxious French stereotypes.
"The Truth About Charlie" is packed with even more badly written nonsensical international intrigue hogwash than the "Mission: Impossible" movies, but without a single exciting set piece. Instead, we must suffer through high camp like the scene where Newton’s character successively dances tango with all the major characters, a cheesy love scene which has French crooner Charles Aznavour materialising in the room and a laughable climax in a flea market with one preposterous twist after another.
I can’t fathom how anyone could make such a consistently worthless picture. This must be someone’s idea of a cruel joke on audiences, a dare to release the worst film possible.
"I see your Batman & Robin, and I raise you Godzilla."
"How about Battlefield Earth?"
"Tomb Raider!"
"Waitaminute... The Truth About Charlie."
"Ouch. I fold."
Avoid the film at all costs!
Norm
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After Philadelphia and Beloved, I really pinned my hope on The Truth About Charlie. Because Demme also made Silence of the Lambs and Married to the Mob, which were very fine, fun pictures.
I thought Philadelphia was an overrated, mediocre movie. Tom Hanks was fine, but he was only as fine as he could be with an almost one-dimensional character. Because of that flaw, a major one, that movie didn't work for me. And Beloved was worthy, but very, very, very dull. I only woke up from that movie during the moments when Thandie Newton performed her hysterics.
Maybe Demme shouldn't make a film with her again. Newton can also be a good actress (see "Flirting" for proof)It could be that they only manage to get the worst out of each other. Maybe Demme should find another muse, and Newton other directors. -
Oct 24, 2002 9:30:08 AM CDT
If I read or hear one more hack journalist say "A remake of Alfr
by cash bailey
...I'm gonna fucking kill someone.
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Oct 24, 2002 9:49:09 AM CDT
Thandie Newton as a modern day Hepburn I can almost see BUT..
by the g-man
Marky Mark for Cary Grant?!?! That kills it right there. You might as well put Dolph Lundgren in for Jimmy Stewart in a remake of "It's a Wonderful Life"
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"mediocre" is not the same as "crap". When will people learn? Harry, for one, still keeps making this same mistake. Most films are mediocre, but "crap" is at the extreme end of the pole. That's not to say I refuse to believe "The Truth About Charlie" isn't crap. I just hope that people would stop saying terrible films are mediocre. Now there's a gross understatement if I ever saw one.
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it's what you've got to be snorting to make movies like this.
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How about Marlo Thomas in the Jimmy Stewart role? It's been done. (And now back to therapy....)
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Stop being so coy, man, and tell us your opinion.
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Oct 24, 2002 11:51:42 AM CDT
How come nobody ever mentions "The Avengers" under the catagorie
by paddyirishman
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tTaC is SUPPOSED to be campy & preposterous. That was the whole point! Quote from Demme himself: "Instead of trying to break down that 4th wall... and make people forget... we thought, let's let folks remember that it's movie and see if there's some extra pleasure, in fact, to be had from that; so we're not taking ourselves all too deadly serious here with our murder-mystery-romance-set-in-Paris."
Interview source: http://www.themovieboy.com/directlinks/demme.htm -
Betcha didn't see that one coming.
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...the reason no one mentions "The Avengers" as one of the worst movies ever made is because, mercifully, few people even remember that steaming pile of dung. To this day it remains only one of three movies that I have ever walked out of after just half an hour or so. Thank God we still have the T.V. series on DVD. And a curse on you my Irish friend for causing me to remember that I ever saw this dreck!
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I didn't like this movie either but comparing it to BATMAN AND ROBIN and that kind of picture is complete horse shit. It is just dull and mediocre. I wish it was that bad, it would've been more entertaining. The comment about the sets being bad is just silly. This was one of the handful of interesting touches in the movie, that when you finally get a glimpse at the guy's real life he's not some super agent - his office might as well be a closet. Also, the character constantly changing identities is necessary because it's a remake of CHARADE. That's what it's about. That's why it's called CHARADE. That was part of the fun of CHARADE, and the would-be-fun of this version. Anyway, please people do not read this review and then get your hopes up that it's going to be a hilarious movie. It's just a boring failed experiment with a really good lookin lady in the lead to make it go down easier.
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Oct 24, 2002 5:34:11 PM CDT
That Demme quote on the film's intentional badness was obviously
by slone13
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Oct 24, 2002 5:41:24 PM CDT
The original had the best villains, George Kennedy, James Coburn
by spacesheik
This one has friggin Lisa Anderson what not and Tim Robbins and friggin Ted Levine...Oh, and by the way Markie Walhlberg is no Cary Grant.
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I have to see this no matter what, Thandie is too damn gorgeous. When I think about how much better Charlie's Angels would have been with Thandie in place of Lucy Liu, it makes me sick. I want to see her in more things. She is more beautiful and a stronger actress than most of those hollywood bimbos.
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I love it how people quote the original movie, act like they believe it is a masterpiece and obviously, they haven't seen it. First off, I think this guy is a plant and that the studios are sending them in flocks here because the reporting and the credence of it has been pretty lacking lately, at least outside of AICN staffers. Characters changing identities? Massive amounts of twists? A shabby office? The flea market? Uh, that's in the original movie, fuckin' geniouses. I'll have to agree the original is fairly ludicrous - if you are going on by logic, there is no reason Reggie should act the way she does. But it was the charm of the actors. It is a suspenseful movie but at times damned hard to believe but you could almost believe Reggie falling in love with Carey Grant (he had too many damned names so I'll call him by his real one) because, well, Carey Grant could play a tough guy one minute (or at least a fairly hard boiled one) and a charmer the next. The original is a very strange concotion, plus, it had James Coburn and George Kennedy in the supporting roles so you know there's nothing lacking there. But if you are going to acknowledge the original, make sure you've seen it or at least tell us you haven't. I"m tired of these shits acting like they know everything, this about film people, not showing how cool you are because you can completely dismantle a movie. I can tell you why any movie blows but I don't cause film isn't always about artistry but the way it feels, the way it makes you feel.
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I admit I haven't seen this movie yet, but the reviewer Norm did sound waaay over the top and even mean-spirited. I still would like to see this movie and if its not the Jonathan Demme's best movie well, I think I'll live with that.
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He only had one good movie. Silence of the Lambs. He's nothing more but a famous name now, sadly...
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TWO good movies: Silence of the Lambs AND Philadelphia. Whoo, if I hadn't of corrected that, I would suffer the wrath of a thousand talkbackers...
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Mark Wahlberg was in, let's see, Boogie Nights and Three Kings, wasn't he? Jonathan Demme directed Something Wild, Married to the Mob, Melvin and Howard, and Citizens Band, in addition to Silence of the Lambs--all pretty damn good movies, if you ask me. So is it possible to take a serious, useful look at this film's alleged flaws, while taking these people seriously and not denigrating their careers because of a possible misstep which few of you have even seen? It would be excusable if any of this Marky Mark crap was still funny. It's just tired. And Demme is a good director. I liked the film a little more than Vern did, thought it was kinda fun, at least sporadically. I think that Demme and even Wahlberg himself must know that he's not Cary Grant. Who is? But judging the film and his performance on its own terms, he's fine.
How many of you people hear a movie is bad, and jump on the bandwagon, trashing the film without ever seeing it, or even seeing it with a keen eye out for all the badness that you heard was in it? Film appreciation is totally subjective and critical consensus is bullshit. I had heard all the negative buzz about this film going in, but I went in with an open mind and enjoyed myself, pretty much. There's nothing worth hating or booing in this film. It's made with affection and humor. It's perfectly okay. -
they did a remake of The Avengers? Who played Captain America?
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The Avengers is the single worst film ever made. Worse than Plan Nine, worse than Battlefield Earth, worse than Driven.
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I agree with Michel. Philadelphia is only a decent movie. Nothing special and very overrated.
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Oct 25, 2002 3:40:17 PM CDT
I'm totally gonna make out with Thandie Newton some day.
by monkey-horse
'Nuff said.
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Just got back from seeing this. Hate to disappoint the Demme worshippers but he just mailed this one in. And got to live in Paris for a few months on the studio's dime. As others mentioned this has a college film school look to it. And I'm not buying that that's 'art' - I'll go with 'lack of effort'. No chemistry between Newton and Wahlberg. Can't believe for a second that she falls for him - maybe a quicky pretty boy bang. Robbins is annoying - you know he's not what he seems. The background music drowns out some of the dialogue. A rental at best.
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No way is The Avengers the worst movie ever made. Wild Wild West and Town and Country were *much* worse. Not that I'm implying that The Avengers wasn't completely shit on every single level, you understand. It's just that there were things that were more shit...
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Oct 26, 2002 9:59:41 AM CDT
Marky Mark should reunite with the funky bunch and quit films
by darth voodoo
This guy is a tool. He is so in love with himself and it shows in every role he takes. I guess he is ok for the Mtv crowd but besides that he's a bore.
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Silence of the Lambs is an absolute masterpiece, a perfectly crafted piece of filmmaking. If you want to see just how well directed the film is, watch Red Dragon and realise what a great director Demme is and Brett Raetner isn't. Philadelphia has it's flaws, but it's very good as well. And what about Stop Making Sense, the great Talking Heads concert film? Truth about Charlie might well be terrible, but Demme is a very very good, classy filmmaker.
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What kind of moron thought it was a good idea to replace Cary Grant with Marky Mark? Heston I can understand; he was a terrible actor anyway, but Grant had more charisma on his hairy taint than Marky Mark ever had.
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