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Razzberry Jamm praises REIGN OF FIRE!

Hey folks, harry here... After I see MINORITY REPORT this Friday... with the exception of ROAD TO PERDITION and SIGNS, this is the movie that I'm most looking forward to for the rest of the summer... with the possible exception of EIGHT LEGGED FREAKS and XXX... but, ummm... hey, I'm a kid in a candy store and the store keeper locked me in by accident... this is great!

I saw the new film Reign of Fire a few weeks back, and although its not much of a 'thinking mans' movie, i've decide to wait and see what I thought about it over time.

For those unfamiliar, the film opens in current day London, where a construction crew unleashes modern day dragons. The film then flashes forward to Christian Bales character Quinn. He lives in c.2025 London, where Dragons have now overtaken the Earth, and our technology has regressed back to medieval ways. He's in charge of a small community that is residing in a castle. Now enter Matthew McConaugheys character, Denton. He leads an American militia group bent on destroying the dragons. Alright...I'll admit it, with that synopsis, the story sounds unbelivably far fetched...and well, it is. However, it does a good job of covering its bases and explaining just exactly how these creatures came to overrun the world.

I for one am a tad tired of the Monster taking over film. Roland Emmerichs version of Godzilla was the last nail in the coffin. However, this film, though sterotypical, breathes some new life into the genre. Much like The Matrix did 3 years ago, the film takes a lot of old ideas and puts them together into an all new product. The thing I enjoyed most is the simply...the dragons. These arent your crappy Dungeons and Dragons fake looking ones. Nor do you hear them start talking in a thick Scottish accent. These are dragons that are bad ass. They do things dragons haven't done in film before. Though they aren't seen for a large majority of the film, when they do show up, its quite impressive.

On the acting front, theres nothing worth writing home about, but then again, some of it is impressive. Bale is badass,and you can tell hes having a blast. McConaughey was tollerable, something I ususally can't say, and they have good chemistry we'll butting heads. Aside from that, the rest of the cast is there to get chomped on, and in that respect they do there job quite admirally. The thing that also helps this film though is the actors inject some character into their performance, and make them a bit more then the 1 dimensional characters we are used to seeing. I enjoyed the directing, Bowman did a good job of pacing the film. Much like his previos X-Files movie, which I also enjoyed, he gives you enough to keep you wanting more.

My only real qualm would be the ending. I won't spoil it, but after the big battle is done with, it ends on a note that almost begs for a sequel. Since I enjoyed the film, thats not necessarily a bad thing. However, it almost refutes my reasons for liking it. I liked it because it was original, and to see a big summer movie that isnt a sequel is almost shocking. I really hope they don't milk this one for all its worth. As it stands though, Reign of Fire is a fun film that seems to be custom built for a franchise. Heres hoping its Reign doesnt end in Fire. (ughh...dammit, i had to end it somehow!)

~Razzberry Jamm

Readers Talkback
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  • June 19, 2002, 3:27 a.m. CST

    Reign of Fire = KICK ASS

    by lionfire

    I love the concept of this movie. Although I wish the technology hadn't reverted back to medevil. I think it would have been alot more interesting to have seen an F-16 Falcon or an F-14 Tomcat lay the smackdown on the dragons. Cuz you know they could. But it appears they have Helicopters in this film.. which is kinda.. Blah. but okay.. In any case.. Incredible Idea and I hope it's executed well.. and according to the review it appears it has been. There have been alot of films where it's been a great concept but was pulled off shitty. Like Dungeons and Dragons.. now they could have gotten really detailed and intimate with the characters.. kinda like a Dragon Lance book or like Lord of the Rings.. but no they gotta make it a big CG cluster fuck. Now a Dragon movie i'd love to see.. Pern.. base it off of the dragon lover's guide to pern book.. with the dragon riders and everything.. not to mention Dragon Lance would be a great movie as well if they'd put as much effort into it as Lord of the rings.. but anywayz.. Reign of Fire lookds bad ass..

  • June 19, 2002, 3:54 a.m. CST

    I can not wait for this movie

    by Chaka015

    dragons burning shit. god yes.

  • June 19, 2002, 4 a.m. CST

    Yes, Pern.

    by MCVamp

    If any books could be made into a great movie, it's the Dragonriders of Pern series. And Disney could take the Dragonsong trilogy and animate it! Perfect marriage.

  • June 19, 2002, 4:02 a.m. CST

    Okay, maybe they're aren't fake like those D&D dragons,

    by Toby O Notoby

    ...intelligent and able to talk like *real* dragons?! Sorry, guys, no Reign of Fire talkback would be complete without it.

  • June 19, 2002, 4:32 a.m. CST

    this will be the worst film for 20 years

    by Julius Caeser

    the trailer sucks, the whole idea of the film sukcks and hey... guess what???? America saves the world again... hmmm pass the sick bag

  • June 19, 2002, 4:55 a.m. CST

    Y'know, I don't think I'll ever stop laughing at tha

    by Cash Bailey

    Almost as funny as that numb-nut who said that FELLOWSHIP will make only $15 million profit from $800+ million box office.

  • June 19, 2002, 5:26 a.m. CST

    Weis and Hickman

    by DannyOcean01

    Haven't read that Pern series, but when I was a teenager I fucking loved the Dragonlance quartet (or quintet if you include that one years later). The only problem is it would probably cost more than LOTR. Nonetheless how cool would it be to see Dragonriders facing off against Dragons attacking with their fabled Dragonlances while Sturm, Tanis, Tasslehoff, Raistlin, Cameron and the others complete their quest.

  • June 19, 2002, 5:34 a.m. CST

    Hmmm....... this sounds an awful lot like Battlefield Earth with

    by glippyglipson

    No seriously, I mean... "The film then flashes forward to Christian Bales character Quinn. He lives in c.2025 London, where Dragons have now overtaken the Earth" And then: "He leads an American militia group bent on destroying the dragons". Do these dragons have dreadlocks and wear big boots to make them look taller? Is scientology trying to brainwash us again with big-budget Hollywood-movies? Omygod, John Travolta probably has a cameo as one of the dragons! Just before Dragonvolta gets smothered by Jeremy Irons and his rod of Savrille, he says in a thick Scottish accent: "When we attacked your planet... all your soldiers and all their advanced technology, you only put up a measly 9-minute fight. This is why Man is an endangered species... and by the way... Look Who's Talking Now and Lucky Numbers were great movies, you rod-wielding asshole!" This movie is going to be so much fun!

  • June 19, 2002, 5:45 a.m. CST

    Cash, my man, I'm with ya!

    by Toby O Notoby

    It's even funnier if you imagine it being said by Ralph Wiggum.

  • June 19, 2002, 5:56 a.m. CST

    This has GOT to be better than AOTC

    by MST3KPIMP

    It's just gotta be..

  • June 19, 2002, 6:19 a.m. CST

    AOTC/LOTR/Spider-man/Lucas robbed my childhood!

    by CleverMovieName

    What does that subject have to do with Reign of Fire? Nothing. Absolutely nothing. However, the summer of 2002 is one of the more promising movie seasons in a while, and this movie looks awesome! Hey, has anyone noticed that Harry looks like Tony Little in a fat suit and red wig? That's damned creepy if you ask me.

  • June 19, 2002, 6:37 a.m. CST

    Looks like cheese

    by Buck Teeth Soh

    Melted cheese at that, but I'm all for reducing London to a smoking ruin - just think, no more Hugh Grant romantic comedies! And its not summer without some daft popcorn movie where Americans save the world cos the rest of us just aren't cornfed and wholesome enough.

  • June 19, 2002, 6:56 a.m. CST

    Another one to get excited about...

    by Ernst Blofeld

    This summer season is shaping up to be the best I can remember in a long time. I've yet to be disappointed in any film so far - true, I've only seen a couple and Scooby Doo is a long way off hitting our shores. But the quality is there and it could well stretch right through to next summer - where I'm willing to bet T3 brings an abrupt end to it all. I'm just worried that the Brits in this film are going to be portrayed in the usual "Brits" in Hollywood type way (ie American actors attempting crap accents). Though the fact this was filmed over in Ireland gives me some hope, even if it is a bunch of Paddy's with pigs under their arms. Ahh stereotypes where would we be without them?

  • June 19, 2002, 7:04 a.m. CST

    Reign of Fire looks darn good...

    by EIFF

    but one question, why bring Star Wars in here. I know that AOTC was brilliant but there are other places to discuss that. I think that this SHOULD do well, if its as good as we have been hearing.

  • June 19, 2002, 8:29 a.m. CST

    Does no one know English?

    by il diabolo

    I do wanna see this movie, but I am taking the opportunity to bash all of the people who submit reviews yet have terrible grasp of the English language. What the hell? Learn how to use the correct words...for example: there = a location (over there) their = possessive, belonging to them they're = they are There's other little things, too. Don't use then for than. Figure out which is the correct "to, too, or two" to use. There's too many more to list. God, people, I even went to public school and I know this. And everyone wonders why our country is going down-hill. People don't even know what is supposed to be their own language!

  • June 19, 2002, 8:52 a.m. CST

    doin' a Van Dyke

    by Ali786

    not sure about Bale's 'cockney' accent..there seems to be a cinematic trend now of cockney rhyming.....might even end up in the Oscars....the best worst cockeny accent goes to.....

  • June 19, 2002, 9:45 a.m. CST

    Just go see AOTC again

    by Atticus Finch

    By the way..did he really say The Matrix breathed new life into the genre? hahahahahahahahaha

  • June 19, 2002, 9:47 a.m. CST

    Oh, diabolo...

    by Strawhenge

    Bash away, Buwana. But be warned. Like the dozens of other arm-chair school-marms who have come before you, you will undergo closer scrutiny than Jose Padilla's colon. Now take your medicine: You "wanna" see this movie, huh? You might "want to" flip through a St. Martin's Handbook first. In those pages, you will discover how to correct your sentences "There's other little things, too" and "There's too many more to list." (Hint: "there's" = "there is"). BTW, no one here is surprised you went to public school Lampwick. Save your indignant braying for catechism.

  • June 19, 2002, 10:09 a.m. CST

    AOTC Tripe

    by MinasTirith

    After that AOTC nightmare, this movie look liks a good time. I like dragons, and since there are no dragons in LOTR this will make the wait till December all the better!!!! GO ROF!!!!!!!!!! GO GO GO!!!!

  • June 19, 2002, 10:24 a.m. CST

    Hey all you foreign-fucks

    by andrecrabtree111

    If you don't like the idea of Americans saving the world in movies we make. . .MAKE YOUR OWN FUCKING MOVIES!!! You stupid, pussy-faced, whining foreigners.

  • June 19, 2002, 10:29 a.m. CST

    Fulffygreycat:

    by Nocturnaloner

    I love you.

  • June 19, 2002, 10:39 a.m. CST

    dragons vs. tanks

    by BurlIvesLeftNut

    How can you not want to go and see a movie that makes the 8 year old inside you jump up and down with delight? This movie looks like something I would have drawn with stick figures--dragons on one side, tanks on the other, blasting each other to smithereens--and that's a GOOD THING. Besides the special effects look better than anything that has come out in a while, including Spider-Man and AOTC.

  • June 19, 2002, 10:40 a.m. CST

    So human civilization is knocked back down to medieval level

    by WarDog

    Yeah, that makes sense. Especially with working GUNS and HELICOPTERS, fa' Chrissake! What a load of crap! People taking refuge in castles? Is that supposed to be the great example of re-medievalized life around the world? Or is it just England which is so fucked up that they have to live that way? Obviously America is better off, since we can send a special team across the Atlantic Ocean. No, I am NOT bragging up America, just pointing out seeming inconsistencies. Or maybe it's the disparate levels of civilization that allow the surviving humans to finally fight back with a chance of winning finally. Reviews don't tell us that. Anyway, I'm there on premiere night!

  • June 19, 2002, 10:49 a.m. CST

    Disney's stealth RoF marketing plan

    by Damitol

    You can't swing a dead cat without whacking some type of Lilo & Stitch promotion (which I am looking forward to and will be my 3 year old son's first "darkened theater" experience), but Disney's marketing campaign for this one seems to be "Dragon Movie? What Dragon Movie? (Go See Stitch)". I have been looking forward to this since I saw some early concept art broke months ago, but except for one TV commercial (which *still* says '2085 A.D.') and a decent web site, Disney almost seems to have forgotten about this one. Reign seems to have the potential to make some decent coin for the Mouse if they just tell the 92% of the movie going public who don't read Ain't It Cool about it. I have little doubt that the characters will be one dimentional, the dialog will be groan worthy in places and the ending will be all too predictable (25 humans vs. 1.2 million dragons - you do the math - at least one egg will be missed. Roll credits.), but if the eye candy, excitement and fun factors are high (and what little I've read about this says they will be), I'll gladly fork over $8.50 now and another $19.99 for the DVD. If Reign dissapears after 4 weeks logging only something in the high 20's for box office, some heads in Disney's marketing better roll.

  • June 19, 2002, 11:05 a.m. CST

    Ah, but are they real Dragons?

    by Chilli Kramer

    [sarcasm on] Because real dragons can talk and breath fire and get slain by guys with swords with remarkable ease. they can also seem smart but fail to solve simple riddles. Oh, and they should tapdance whilst singing showtunes. On bicycles. Otherwise they aren't REAL Dragons! Oh, and if that gut thinks Sean Connery has a THICK Scottish accent, boy he's in for a surprise if he ever visits Scotland...

  • June 19, 2002, 11:07 a.m. CST

    That should read 'that GUY'

    by Chilli Kramer

    not 'that gut', sorry. Damned tyros! I mean typos! 'Damned tyros' sounds like a line from this film.

  • June 19, 2002, 11:13 a.m. CST

    Draggin' ass

    by AliceInWonderlnd

    This looks moderately cool. I will doubtless view this motion picture. Regarding McCaffrey's Dragonriders books, she did say in a signing a few years back that she will sign nothing unless she is guaranteed full script control. (This isn't rumour, I was actually presently and heard her say this) This has canned at least one McCaffrey project before today. Regarding the books themselves, I loved them when I was a prepubescent girl but I tried re-reading them not so long ago and they were way too Harlequin romance for me (she has actually earned a nickel or too writing Harlequin romances before today). But if she ever were to yield script control, there probably would be enough in there to make a decent movie out of the elements of the books. Dragonlance I've never read - I've read LOTR, and since most of the rest of "high fantasy" is pale imitation, I've long since learned not to bother with it.

  • June 19, 2002, 11:42 a.m. CST

    Most High Fantasy IS a pale imitation...

    by HeeHeeHee

    It's a shame. That's not to say that all fantasy is worthless, though, there's plenty of good (low?) fantasy out there... it's just not as popular as the bazillion D&D books or the bloated purposefully-epic series.

  • June 19, 2002, 11:54 a.m. CST

    Go! Go! Reach your vertical limit!

    by Buck Teeth Soh

    This is the film that puts mountains in Norfolk, right? Haha. Oh and Andre Crabtree? We foreigners do make our own fucking movies - some good, some bad. We also make most of yours - just check the nationality of a few directors some time (Verhoeven, Scott, Jackson, and that's just for starters). Dumbass.

  • June 19, 2002, 11:58 a.m. CST

    I am also looking forward to MIB 2

    by p1nkerton

    82 minutes long, its probably perfect for anyone with ADD. Reign of Fire looks....interesting, i hope it pans out. Summer has been pretty strong so far with only meager dissapointments, nothing can be as bad as Bad Company.

  • June 19, 2002, 12:02 p.m. CST

    Dragons with thick Scottish accents! Run for your lives!

    by General Idea

    Dragonheart was just awful. No excuse for that silliness. Looks like they're going for a look closer to Dragonslayer, which is good. That dragon kicked ass for what they had to work with...

  • June 19, 2002, 12:10 p.m. CST

    FluffyGrey Cat forgot to mention...

    by Det. John Kimble

    ...that the French would deny the Americans any fly-over rights, at least until the dragons had taken up residence on the Champs D'Elysee. But in their defense they would whip out some bottles of champagne for the post-victory dragon meat barbeque.

  • June 19, 2002, 12:11 p.m. CST

    Denis Beauvais

    by Darth Buttafuoco

    Has anyone seen the painting by Denis Beauvais of a fighter jet going up against a dragon at night? It's painted from the pilot's POV, and the lighting and mood is incredible. I was hoping this film would have something like that, but apparently not. Sigh.

  • June 19, 2002, 12:23 p.m. CST

    hey Ali786

    by donaldsutherland

    bale is british. i'm sure he'd have a blast picking apart your alabama drawl if you ever mustered the gumption to get out of the basement and DO SOMETHING with your life. here's an oscar category: best fat, lazy, zit-riddled critic who has never done anything worthwhile.

  • June 19, 2002, 12:27 p.m. CST

    Hooray for Dragons!

    by larisa

    i don't know, but this movie looks to be alot of fun and stupid and does not neccesarily mark the end of the cinematic world. The end of the cinematic world will occur when "Swim Fan" is released this fall. the chick from "traffic" plays some psycho hose beast who emails naked pictures of herself to a guy on the swim team. hooray for 'swim fan' hooray for dragon movies hooray for movies. and lets just hope there's a sequel to "regin of fire" to star the dragon himself, Sisquo and there's a a great music number about lady dragons who wear thongs and who tell Bob Newheart that he needs to live. Hooray for Sisquo!

  • June 19, 2002, 12:32 p.m. CST

    Jeezuz Harry! Run a spell checker first!

    by Johnny Rocket

    Razzberry Jamm might not know that MS Word has a spell/grammar check built in Harry, but you really should. "Much like his previos X-Files movie..." "...and in that respect they do there job quite admirally." How can we accept AICN as a reputable movie news outlet when the reports look like their written by school children! If you'll excuse me now, I'm gonna reed sum more articuls on yer websight.

  • June 19, 2002, 12:42 p.m. CST

    Independence Day meets Jurassic Park

    by Andel Crodo

    I absolutely loathe Matthew "turn your head and" McConaughey. I hear he pulled a Max Shrek on the set for this one, too. Seen half the movies he's been in and liked none of them. The guy's a worthless waste of human flesh IMO. Despite it all, I'll be seeing this flick anyhow. The somewhat original premise as well as Bale's presence must make it worth a matinee at the very least. Hopefully, it'll be much more than only that!

  • June 19, 2002, 12:49 p.m. CST

    Trailer looks a hell of a lot better than AOTC

    by Porgy

    One thing's for sure - any good action scenes in Reign Of Fire will probably end up being replicated in Star Wars:Episode III - but done a lot worse. And the same is true about Minority Report and Scooby-Doo. Come to think of it, Steve Irwin should keep a close eye on his copyright as well, 'cause Lucas is frantically taking notes....Just watched 5th ELement - pretty lousy movie (that is, until you see AOTC/TPM - then 5th element looks like genius) and the flying car chase scene is so much better than its inferior clone in AOTC. I hope some-one files a multi-million dollar plagarism law suit against Lucas, though that might be too unkind, given AOTC's failure at the box-office.

  • June 19, 2002, 1:31 p.m. CST

    Did they keep the "downer" ending that test audiences were bitch

    by SilenceofFreedom

    They better have. I hate it when the director is forced to give up a part of his vision because of what a handful of people say he should do. Just imagine how bad the ending of "From Hell" would have been had they not kept the one they used. I don't mind if the "reign" ending begs for a sequel, just so long as it isn't a new ending.

  • June 19, 2002, 1:50 p.m. CST

    The talkbacks lately have been too much fun...

    by WeedyMcSmokey

    ...what with Moriarty "outing" that producer Don Murphy yesterday and the "real" dragon debate today - I am having an excellent time. Oh, and I love it when guys like Andre Crabtree refer to people not from the US as 'foreign', because we all know the internet has some kind of national boundary - "All yous dang foriegners, gets off ma 'nternet!! Go on, get!" Ah, I'll cut the guy some slack - he can't be more than 14.

  • June 19, 2002, 1:52 p.m. CST

    Dragons!

    by Xyzan

    I want a Pern movie! That would be great. Everyone repeat after me. Pern! Pern! Pern! Ramoth Rules! This movie should be great! I can't wait! Firey, firey death! I think the biggest objection to the "America saves the day" thing is that the british are never portrayed well in those movies, unless we're in khaki in the desert! It's London being flamed, we want someone British to be the hero! Anyway, i'm starting a petition to save the dragons and keep them away from the mean little humans armed with nothing but rope and a cocktail stick (and metal armour tat should shart burnng people before they have a chance to poke things at defenseless dragons) and a bored looking maiden who looks like she's had too much plastic surgery for her own good. We all know how this movie is going to end, but with your help we might just be able to spare the dragons!

  • Spider-Man? Fantastic. Star Wars? Enjoyed the hell out of it. Sum of All Fears? Loved it. Bourne Identity? Kicked all forms of ass. Scooby Doo? Enjoyed it more than I thought I would, same thing with Windtalkers. Insomnia, Undercover Brother, About A Boy,... Jesus f'n Christ...even Spirit was a good movie!! Now we have Minority Report, Reign of Fire, Austin Powers, Mr. Deeds and Signs gettng good buzz?!?! Let's not forget Men In Black II and Triple X, two big movies that are sure to be entertaining popcorn flicks at the very least. Plus, for some strange reason, I've been dying to see Lilo & Stitch. You can't say this summer hasn't surprised you just a little bit, right? Sure, we've also got movies like Bad Company, Enough and Crocodile Hunter polluting out cinemas... but there were bound to be a few bad apples.

  • June 19, 2002, 1:59 p.m. CST

    I swear...

    by DarthArrrrgh!

    If I hear one more uneducated ignorant jackoff bash Lucas, TPM, AOTC I am going to go ballastic! I would so very much enjoy getting into politics, becoming president, declaring myself Emperor, then doing away with all those people. ALL OF THEM!

  • June 19, 2002, 2:05 p.m. CST

    Confused

    by Xyzan

    If this is now medieval and dragons rule the earth, why would they allow milita groups to fly or sail over from britain to London? Our transport systems aren't that good, so wouldn't the scaley ones object? Bizzare!

  • June 19, 2002, 2:25 p.m. CST

    DarthArrrrgh!.....

    by Psynapse

    You're gonna go 'ballastic'? Does that mean you're going to swell up like beach ball or something? I'm bored and you're slow so here goes: I'm happy for you that George Lucas and his Star Wars franchise have brought so much meaning to your life, REALLY. Other than the amazing special effects and some endearing dialogue the Star Wars franchise really has nothing to distinguish it from numerous other SciFi stories except for the fact that countless legions of rabid geeks have made it more commercially successfull than most. On top of that, George Lucas has the social skills of a 12 year old. Yeah, that's right, TRY to justify Ewoks for me.

  • June 19, 2002, 2:29 p.m. CST

    Speaking of Lucas

    by lionfire

    How about a "Secret of Monkey Island" Movie? I wonder what the CG would look like of LeChuck. Elijah Wood = Guybrush Threepwood - Yeah that would work. And to all the people who bitch about perfect grammar/english/spelling.. Go to hell this is the internet not english class.

  • June 19, 2002, 2:36 p.m. CST

    Disappointing summer so far...

    by Forest the Gimp

    ...what the hideous AOTC (willl someone please take Lucas away and quietly put him to sleep? Please?) - Spiday was OK though the best bits were him flying through the streets. I just hope Minority report and Reign of Fire can save the day...

  • June 19, 2002, 2:42 p.m. CST

    Best Summer movies yet to come

    by LaneM

    I have always thought that Reign of Fire would be the sleeper hit of the summer. Now it looks like it might not be a sleeper. With two good AICN reviews and a lot of commercials running, I don't think this will sneak up on anyone. Can't wait till 7/12!

  • June 19, 2002, 2:49 p.m. CST

    Where are the comercials?

    by Xyzan

    i haven't seen any. just an article for the posters in a magazine, and then the AICN reviews. i want to see dragons!

  • June 19, 2002, 3:21 p.m. CST

    Commercials

    by LaneM

    The commercial aired a couple of times during the MTV Movie Awards and I've seen them on a bunch of different networks as well. If you want to see more dragons, check out the behind-the-scenes stuff at www.reignoffire.com. Dragons rule!

  • June 19, 2002, 4:26 p.m. CST

    Colin Farrel

    by DoogieHowitzer

    What in the HELL is up with the Farrel/Bullseye unibrow. He looks like the little freak baby from the Simpsons that Maggie hates.....oh, well thanks for the link anyway

  • June 19, 2002, 4:30 p.m. CST

    Pern

    by Hunter91

    OK, the dipshit that said Disney should animate the Pern films need to kicked out of AICN site. The thought of the "Rat" defiling one of the best Sci-Fi/Fantasy series known to man makes me want to tie the little bitch up who posted this and make him sit and watch the Hunchback of Notre Dame over and over again. Yes, Pern would rule in the hands of Chris Colombus, The Wachowski Brothers, Spielberg, even the Hughes Brothers, but that giant corporate rat better never FUCKING touch this holy series!

  • June 19, 2002, 5:44 p.m. CST

    lionfire: Word, bitch! MONKEY ISLAND like a motherfucker!!

    by Cash Bailey

    Those games just crack me up no end. If they could get the same writers to do the script and get Brad Bird to direct it would hopefully put an end to that soppy SPIRIT shit.

  • June 19, 2002, 7:44 p.m. CST

    Fall asleep next to the hot plate again, Colin?

    by TimBenzedrine

    Interesting Bullseye photo, there.

  • June 19, 2002, 11:06 p.m. CST

    Psynapse123

    by DarthArrrrgh!

    You don't know me. So, I wouldn't start with the personal attacks. Lucas always said that the film's target audience was 12 year olds. Kids loved the Ewoks, thus their justification.

  • June 20, 2002, 12:43 a.m. CST

    A Dragonlance movie would work better than a Pern movie

    by BrashHulk

    Speaking in a strict movie-making sense, It's easier to adapt simple stories rather than complex ones. LOTR is a simple story. The Happy Potter books are simple. Comic book heroes are simple. Pern is too soft, complex, wordy, and feminine to make a decent series of movies like LOTR. The Dragonlance series would make much more sense overall. DL is a straight-forward action movie with minimal characterization, with the very B&W good guys and bad guys all focusing on the same thing. That's the kind of pitch that H'wood producers want to hear - simple plot, lots of action, voluptuous babes and buff heroes, cool monsters, and plenty of CGI, baby!

  • June 20, 2002, 12:50 a.m. CST

    no pern

    by kojiro

    The only reason the Pern series has had any success is that McCaffrey's writing style appeals to some people. The storylines themselves are actually rather thin and could not be transferred to film or tv. I'd actually try to prove this if I could remember enough about the damned stories, but I put those books aside many years ago. If you think they would make good flicks however, well, take some time and think about how you would put those stories into film. Maybe you'll change your mind.

  • June 20, 2002, 1:45 a.m. CST

    kojiro, Hunter91...re: Pern

    by MCVamp

    Kojiro, the first Pern book could work well as a movie: the discovery of last true Weyrwoman Lessa, the return of the deadly Thread, and Lessa's journey to bring the dragonriders of days gone by to aid Pern's future. Writes itself with very little alteration. That would work. Hunter91: you didn't read closely, and for insulting me you can suck my ass. I wouldn't want Disney anywhere near the REAL Pern books, but the Dragonsong trilogy, featuring the coming-of-age of a young female musician, WOULD fit as an animated feature, and better Disney as opposed to Dreamworks. But of course, only if the suits keep their dicks out of the soup and let the storytellers do their job, as it looks like Lilo & Stitch will be a result of.

  • June 20, 2002, 5:28 a.m. CST

    Pern; Puffnstuff; Godzooky

    by Buck Teeth Soh

    Each more cutsey than the last. I'm sorry, the whole friendly dragon with a human master (alright, symbiotic telepathic significant other) schtick is one I don't generally buy into. Dragons are scary scaly fire-breathing virgin-munching village-roasting hobbit-toasting ichor-dripping knight-in-shining-armour-ripping evil sumbitches, and make bloody awful pets unless you're a world class Evil Goth Sorceress or a Boris Vallejo painting. Dragonlance might be better if they carve out all the obvious dice-rolling and change everyone's alignment to chaotic evil.

  • June 20, 2002, 7:41 a.m. CST

    Minas Tirith, its gotta hurt that the 5th film in a "dying" fran

    by Atticus Finch

    Feel the burn! AOTC is easily the best movie of the summer. All the other imitators and haters should be kissing Lucas' ass for revolutionizing film. Bash all you want...I love a good laugh.

  • June 20, 2002, 8:27 a.m. CST

    "Medieval ways"

    by RoJaws

    1st time posting, so please be gentle (yeah, right !) Just my 1/2p worth on the medieval ways angle; I don't think the implication is that the whole of humanity has regressed to a medieval level of technology in 20ish years, but rather that the whole infrastructure has collapsed, including electricity and water supplies, so nothing works anymore. The dragons would presumably have torched anything big with smoke coming out of it - IE power stations. What would be left as a way of life would probably be worse than medieval, since few people would have much of a clue as to how to cope without mass produced products, power, etc. Living in castles ? how cute, except: the remaining castles in the UK and Europe might be the only buildings with thick enough walls to withstand a dragon attack, so perhaps not such a quaint idea after all. And finally for now, the USA saves the day again ! Normally this peeves me as much as the next non-American (flame suit on), but in this case, it might actually make sense. There's no mythology of dragons in America right ? (could be wrong there, but hear me out). I'm assuming these things are big, and need a lot of energy in order to be able to fly, and use that energy up pretty quickly (how many calories in the average virgin sacrifice I wonder ?) Makes me think it's very unlikely they could ever manage to cross the Atlantic. Even assuming they flew North and crossed over at the Bearings Sea, they're creatures of fire right ? probably not best suited for long flights in subzero temperatures. That's it from me; can't wait to see this film to see if my theories hold water, and if they

  • June 20, 2002, 8:43 a.m. CST

    Plot Holes and Nasty Fixes

    by zinc_chameleon

    My idea to fill the plot hole was to have the dragon eggs loaded with some sort of retro-virus that nails most of the Earth's higher mammals. That would easily explain how the Dragons took over. As a matter of fact, I'm just borrowing from Discover magazine's latest theory on dinosaur extinction: a one-two punch of drought and asteroid. It usually takes a couple of knocks to take out a dominant species. A world-wide plague and *then* the arrival of a super-predator would do it, thought. Of course, the search for a cure would lead to a sequel!

  • June 20, 2002, 10:37 a.m. CST

    TEST

    by Buck Teeth Soh

  • June 20, 2002, 10:38 a.m. CST

    Now that we're back in sequence, re: Pern

    by Buck Teeth Soh

    I'm going to repost: I'm sorry, the whole friendly dragon with a human master (alright, symbiotic telepathic significant other) schtick is one I don't generally buy into. Dragons are scary scaly fire-breathing virgin-munching village-roasting hobbit-toasting ichor-dripping knight-in-shining-armour-ripping evil sumbitches, and make bloody awful pets unless you're a world class Evil Goth Sorceress or a Boris Vallejo painting. Dragonlance might be better if they carve out all the obvious dice-rolling and change everyone's alignment to chaotic evil.

  • June 20, 2002, 12:02 p.m. CST

    kojiro, Hunter91...re: Pern AGAIN

    by Hunter91

    Kojiro, or as I like to fondly think of you, lil' crying bitch; I DO NOT WANT DISNEY TOUCHING ANYTHING EVEN REMOTELY RELATED TO PERN! So, I could give a flying fuck if you were specifically referring to the Dragon Song series. I do not want those no-talent ass-clowns at the "Rat" to do anything but make harmless movies for children, well and I guess people like you. In short, fuck u very much; u are, and will remain a dipshit.

  • June 20, 2002, 12:14 p.m. CST

    Darth Arrrrgh!: PART 2

    by Psynapse

    Fair enough, I don't know you. Consider any personal attack hereby retracted. Besides, no attacks are necessary as you yourself have managed to point out the underlying flaw of the Star Wars franchise: It's made for 12 year olds! Just like the Care Bear Bunch was. ( Oh now I've done it, they are gonna get SO pissed at that crack)

  • June 20, 2002, 12:25 p.m. CST

    Hey SpacePerv

    by andrecrabtree111

    I think you have to admit that, while you don't generally like the idea of the dragons being friendly with the humans, there is precedent for it. I'm talking about how birds can sometimes imprint on beings other than their mothers. It's like the guy who got all those geese to imprint on him so he could teach them how to migrate properly. Anyway, that's what I thought about when I read the Pern books and it seemed to make sense. Just a thought. Oh, and to the dick who didn't like my "foreigner" comment: This movie is made in Hollywood. That makes the movie "American." If you are not an American, you are "foreign" to someone who IS American, which I am. Just like I am a "foreigner" to you, if you live outside the US. I never said anything about there being boundaries on the internet, which is perfectly illustrated by dickheaded foreigners like you posting on this site, which arguably has its origin in America. So suck my dick.

  • June 20, 2002, 2:03 p.m. CST

    Psynapse Part 2

    by DarthArrrrgh!

    Actually, I beleive that the target audience for Care Bears was six, not 12. Although it was a very nice, warm and fuzzy program. Except for that Professor Coldheart, brrrrr! Was he scary or what?

  • June 20, 2002, 2:45 p.m. CST

    DarthArrrgh!: PART 3

    by Psynapse

    ROFLMSAO!!!! Sir Darth, I salute you. (*_^)

  • June 20, 2002, 3:08 p.m. CST

    Re: Does no one know English?

    by Fish Tank

    I completely agree with you on this post Il Diabolo. Harry's et al are as guilty of this, and spawning poor English. I would like to point out however, that in your post you say "There's other little things, too." as well as "There's too many more to list". The correct way to say this is "There ARE other little things", and "There ARE too many to list". ARE for plural, IS for singular. The rest of your post was fine. ;-)

  • June 20, 2002, 3:11 p.m. CST

    Re: Does no one know English (part 2)

    by Fish Tank

    Hahahahahaha - cough-sputter I posted "Harry's et al" instead of "Harry et al" - oops. Sent off before checking.

  • June 20, 2002, 3:29 p.m. CST

    Regin of Fire is a movie i need to see

    by moose420

    Their are few movies i want to see this summer and with two down all ready theirs only 4 left. Them being Regin of fire XXX ,signs and JACKASS THE MOVIe. YEAH so i can't wait for this movie to come out it will sure kck ass lets hope it makes enough money for a squeal!!

  • June 21, 2002, 2:29 a.m. CST

    Dragonslayer

    by Yossarian

    Whoever mentioned Dragonslayer, good call, I saw that movie once when I was what, 7? 8? Man it kicked ass for what they had to work with. That scene where the baby dragons were munching on disembodied princess-limbs was one of the finer traumatizing moments in my life. Really memorable movie when seen through kid-goggles.

  • June 21, 2002, 5:44 a.m. CST

    More about Dragonslayer

    by Buck Teeth Soh

    D'ye remember the olden days when they made films for kids with an attention span? I loved that scene at the end where you've got church and state both claiming the kill, while the magic goes out of the world. *** Andre, fair point, especially since birds evolved from lizards, although this is dangerously close to "real dragons are intelligent, can talk, imprint like birds, chew limestone for fuel and go bowling on a Friday night.". Ah hell, this is fantasy, anything can happen. I prefer Moorcock's dragonriders cos they spend less time talking metaphysics and more time frying ground troops. BTW I made one of those foreigner remarks, but I'll call it a truce if you will.

  • June 21, 2002, 12:43 p.m. CST

    hunter91, perhaps you might take a moment...

    by kojiro

    and reflect upon the facxt that my post had no relation to you and whoever your arguing with. Remember, when you post in anger there is a tendency to make an ass of yourself.------------MCvamp: I just don't see the necesary dramatic tension reaching the screen in an adaptation. I don't think the jump back in time could be depicted in a manner which matches its importance to the story and I don't think that the fall of thread could be shown in an exciting manner. A movie could be made which satisfies the fans of books, but for those who haven't read them and those like me who have read them but cannot be categorized as fans I think the it would be pretty unremarkable.

  • June 22, 2002, 9:20 a.m. CST

    Strawhenge

    by il diabolo

    Touche...however, I am not posting/publishing articles on any websites. Also, my lambaste was on word usage that I see repeatedly used incorrectly. These are even more fundamental than my "casual speech" that I typed. Mine was not an article nor an essay, so I intentionally did not use "schoolhouse grammar," but some "slang." Oh, well, I guess it is not that important for one to know their own language, so go after those who care.

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