Roswell 3.18 FAQ
What’s this week’s episode called?
“Graduation.”
Who’s responsible?
Teleplay is credited to series creator Jason Katims and “Star Trek” vet Ronald D. Moore.
“In a voice-over at the start of this emotional conclusion of the sci-fi series' third and final season, Liz says: ‘Even when you see the future...fate has a way of intervening and upsetting the best-laid plans of mice and men.’ Apparently, that insight applies to aliens, too. Here, as Liz (Shiri Appleby) and Max (Jason Behr) mull life after high school, Liz discovers that she possesses the power of premonition, and predicts that a Crashdown patron is in danger. Later, she foresees the slayings of herself, Max, Isabel and Michael. Also, Jesse is offered a high-paying job in Boston; Maria and Michael visit a tarot-card reader; and Kyle contemplates a new direction. ”
What is TV Guide not telling us?
We learn in the teaser that the future depicted in Liz’s premonitions is easily subverted.
Any sign of the dupes, Brody Davis, Little Zan, or those aliens who shed snakeskin?
Nope.
Is this really the last episode?
By all accounts, it’s the last one on UPN. In all likelihood, tonight is the last time any of us will ever see a fresh televised tale of Liz, Max, Michael, Iz, Maria, Kyle and Jim.
What did Herc say about this one is his February spoilers?
* Tess and child seem to be gone again by this point.
* Maria learns from fortune teller Madame Vivian and she and Michael will be separated forever. When she tells Michael, he cries fakery.
* Tess’ reappearance will apparently do little to inhibit the romanace shared by Max and Liz, who spend at least part of this episode tonguing each other unreservedly.
* Harvard Schmarvard! Liz seems to be planning to go to college in Chicago (Northwestern?) next autumn. Max seems cool with the idea, suggesting he might follow her there.
* Kyle approaches his boss at the garage about becoming a partner and maybe expanding the business. Toby, the boss, just laughs him off. Jim Valenti accidentally overhears.
* The USAF, having seen what Iz can do, considers abducting her.
* Deciding that Iz may not be the only alien, the military orders that she be watched 24/7.
* Liz exhibits a new superpower not unfamiliar to either Johnny Smith or Cordelia Chase.
* Finally, some sad and funny and kind-of-brilliant third-act Crashdown dialogue that’s in the script but may or may not be heard in the episode:
- CUSTOMER: Do you recommend the Smallville Salad?
- LIZ: It would be hard for me to do that actually.
- CUSTOMER: Hm. Alright, I guess I’ll just stay with the Roswell Burrito.
- LIZ: Smart move. This is actually the last night for the Roswell. New menus tomorrow and it didn’t make the cut.
- CUSTOMER: What?! I’ve been eating the Roswell burrito for the past three years. It’s a classic.
- LIZ: Hey, I just work here. I don’t decide what’s on the menu.
Does the “Smallville” dialogue survive?
Sadly, it does not. But “Superman” does come up.
Does the military kill the kids in Liz’s vision.
Yes.
Does anyone return to the home planet this week?
No.
The big news?
A lot gets wrapped up this week. Behold the Inviso-Text: Isabel leaves her pretty-boy husband behind. Jim Valenti returns to law enforcement. And then there’s the what happens to Max and Liz.
What’s good?
It’s feels like an ending.
What’s not so good?
Of the three “Roswell” season enders, this is by far the weakest. Everything wraps up up wayyyyyy too quickly. (This may owe largely to the fact that the show’s 22-episode order was cut to 18. But still.) And the “climactic” graduation rescue is just lame.
How does it end, spoiler boy?
Liz (wearing the sexiest wedding dress ever fashioned) and Max emerge from church as newlyweds, then climb into the mystery van they will presumably use to evade authorites and solve crime. Max, Liz, Iz, Michael, Maria and Kyle then use the van to speed off for parts unknown. “All I know is that I’m Liz Parker, and I’m happy.”
Herc’s rating for “Roswell” 3.18?
**1/2
The Hercules T. Strong Rating System:
- ***** better than we deserve
- **** better than most motion pictures
- *** actually worth your valuable time
- ** as horrible as most stuff on TV
- * makes you quietly pray for bulletins
I am – Hercules!!
To order boxer shorts adorned with the image of a green, handicapable “Buffy” fanatic, click here.
| 
