Movie News

ALEXANDRA DuPONT Attacks CLONES!! Sort Of...

Published at: May 9, 2002, 3:23 a.m. CST by staff

Alexandra DuPont needs no introduction for regular readers of the site. She's got her look here at ATTACK OF THE CLONES, and I'll save my comments for my own review. Take it away, my dear:

Introduction: Keep those expectations in check, fellow geeks

This time, it's not that simple.

I enjoy the dubious distinction of having written one of the first online reviews of The Phantom Menace. You can blind yourself on that laser burn of dashed expectations here — or you can read my re-cap of many of the same points during a follow-up appraisal of the excellent DVD here. I'm afraid I'm rude on both occasions.

But now that Episode II: Attack of the Clones is upon us, it's not that simple — and I'm not feeling so mean. That said, I do think the many Talk Backers taking an absolutist, "it will rock or it will suck" stance on the picture need to relax and temper their expectations a bit — or they will be miserable.

For Episode II is, I'm sorry to report, a mixed bag — an improvement on Phantom Menace, to be sure, but hardly the home run director George Lucas needed to bring everyone back into church glassy-eyed and drooling and singing hosannas. Instead, it's a minor base hit; the movie sort of sputters to life, with occasional action set pieces punctuating a series of deadly-dull meetings — until, with about 45 minutes to go, the film suddenly plays to the cheap seats and embraces its pulp roots and becomes a very big, very violent, kind-of-dumb monster movie all the way to its slam-bang conclusion.

The monster-movie connection really slammed me during the climactic arena battle, which is just packed to the gills with Jedi Knights and robots and mosquito-men and dusty mayhem. There's this one full-profile long shot of Obi-Wan facing down what is essentially a giant, shrieking praying mantis — and it flashed me back instantly to a shot of a wayward Union soldier facing down a giant crab in Mysterious Island, one of the cherished Dynamation stop-motion monster movies of my youth. At that exact moment, I realized that the movie had abandoned all hope of telling a powerful story and was ladling out monster-movie thrills as only ILM can, and without apology.

This will be enough for many fans. It will not be enough for all of them. Speaking personally, I found Clones quite entertaining the second I stopped holding it up to a mythological standard that I've always felt the Star Wars movies needed to meet — and that slackening of standards has proven both liberating and bittersweet. More on that far below.

________

It's all spoilers from here on out: What's the story?

Ten years have passed since Phantom Menace. Obi-Wan (Ewan McGregor) and Anakin (Hayden Christensen) have been assigned to Senator Padme's (Natalie Portman's) security detail; she's been the target of assassination attempts ever since she decided to vote against the creation of a vast galactic army.

A new assassination attempt — this one involving droids and creepy centipedes and followed by a marvelous but somewhat geographically confusing flying-car chase that plays like The Fifth Element by way of "T.J. Hooker" — splits up our heroes and sends them skulking across the galaxy:

Obi-Wan flies off to see who's behind the assassination attempts, and uncovers a vast conspiracy involving (a) hidden planets, (b) the creation of a "clone army" of stormtroopers and (c) a rebellion led by a coven of Dune-inspired guild leaders and the rogue Jedi Count Dooku (Christopher Lee). Meanwhile, Anakin and Padme go into hiding — first (and sort of unnecessarily, plot-mechanics-wise) on Naboo, then on Tatooine, where Anakin finds out his mother's gone missing. Along the way, the couple falls in love rather abruptly — following some stalkerish pleading by Anakin — and a family tragedy pushes young Skywalker into vengeful, homicidal territory.

At which point the movie finally gets interesting and kicks into high gear.

Following some anguish and light mayhem and a few more scenes of people standing around talking, everybody shows up in an alien gladiator arena. Roughly 30 minutes of unprecedented ILM pornography ensues — their best work since the attack sequence in Pearl Harbor. There are monsters! Lightsaber duels! Too many characters to follow! Bits of lame comedy involving C-3PO's misplaced nog! And Yoda putting on the proverbial pimp-smack!

________

Is the movie different from the draft screenplay that was online a few weeks ago?

Considerably, and for the better. Roughly 50 percent of the plodding, redundant exposition — include a "Dawson's Creek"-ish stay with Padme's family on Naboo — has been neatly snipped from the final cut. Meanwhile, a clunky action scene in a droid factory — and one that doesn't make a whole lot of logistical sense, quite frankly, unless the Geonosians are putting landing pads in their smokestacks — has been added.

But still. Although there are solid action set pieces along the way, that leaves a lot of people sitting around talking in the first half of the film. Which leads to my biggest critique, and I'm afraid it's a bit of a deal-breaker for many:

________

So how's that love story?

Good Lord, it's just horribly written by George Lucas and Jonathan Hales — but it's not horribly written and horribly acted and horribly dwelled upon, which is what I was most afraid of.

In the coming weeks, I think, Attack of the Clones is going to be compared quite frequently to Titanic; both movies force their viewers to slog through an expository, sophomoric romance before rewarding them with a staggering set piece. But there's a crucial difference: Titanic's Jack Dawson gets Rose to fall in love with him by appealing to her inner liberated woman and painting her portrait and getting her freak on in a Model T. Anakin, on the other hand gets Padme to fall in love with him by essentially reciting the Stalker's Lament ad nauseam — two-dozen variations on the following three sentences:

"Obi-Wan's holding me back! I love you! It will make me miserable if you don't love me back!"

Well past the point that this particular barrage of dialogue has gotten uncomfortably creepy, Padme suddenly gives in to Anakin (during what is, I must admit, a quietly underplayed little scene as the couple's being rolled into the Geonosian arena). But there are no "transitional scenes" between Padme's two emotional poles. It's as if a switch flips and the woman takes total bloody leave of her senses.

Personally, I didn't buy it for a second, and scoff at those who would counter, "Oh, well, it's Lucas' depiction of 'young love.'" Maybe for Anakin — but for Padme? The woman has been dealing with politicians and dignitaries and probably more than a few lecherous cranks since her bat mitzvah. And now she falls for this dilettante, this arriviste, this un-sophisticate? He's not fit to carry Bail Organa's luggage!

All that said, the movie never spends more than five minutes at a time on this narrative thread, and Hayden Christensen does the best he can with the material. While Portman could still stand to freshen up her vocal life a bit more — though she's considerably less autistic-sounding than in Clones — Christensen has a fine glower, and uses it to good effect more than once.

________

So what's good?

(1) Technically, Lucas has once again rewritten the rules of cinema with his digital cameras — Clones' digital cinematography is indistinguishable from movies shot on film, if not better-looking. I have to hand it to the Flanneled One: The technical innovations he's spearheaded will theoretically allow anyone to make any kind of movie they want in the years to come. For that, maybe he should be forgiven a thousand Phantom Menaces.(Oh. Wait. No he shouldn't.)

(2) Once again, kudos to the beleaguered and passionate and pear-shaped geeks of ILM: The action set-pieces and art direction are just ridiculously generous in terms of production design and effects detail. I mean, ridiculously generous. I may have to watch the film again just to drink it all in. (The little riffs on cheesy Tokyo advertising in the Coruscant entertainment district were probably my favorite little grace note.)

(3) Ian McDiarmid is a mean little camp icon in his reduced role as Chancellor Palpatine, the closet Godfather of Evil. "I love democracy!" he tells the Galactic Senate even as he's yanking it from them. Hilarious! And the way he holds his hands like the Emperor while talking to Anakin!

(4) The opening shot is a return to form after Menace's boring fly-by. (For my money, Star Wars opening shots need to be vast.) And after the title crawl, the camera pans up instead of down to the busy planetscape — a nice deviation.

(5) There's a moment when, after Anakin has slaughtered an entire Tusken village (and yes, it's a nice homage to The Searchers, and yes, we see him decapitating no fewer than three Sandpeople in the process) where he's recounting his crime to Padme in the Lars family garage. As he's calling them "animals," we cut to a close-up on his face — and I swear, for the first time in a while, it feels like we're watching Method Acting in a Star Wars movie.

(6) That said, McGregor is, as Mr. Harry Knowles noted, "totally on the clock" as Kenobi. One wishes there was more to his detective-story arc; he grounds all the movie's best moments — grimacing as he beheads a giant insect, growling like Alec Guinness outside a Coruscant nightclub, relaxing as he commiserates with the four-armed informant Dexter Jettster (and yes, Lucas does seem to be letting his children name his characters again) in a diner.

(7) People were laughing at the already-infamous Yoda/Dooku lightsaber duel — but it was that delighted-surprise kind of laughter, near as I could tell. I wish there had been more of that sort of delight throughout the movie.

________

What's not so good?

(1) While I was happy to see the Death Star plans being handed to Count Dooku near the end, I was quietly and irrationally disappointed that they weren't the groovy, low-fi, '70s vector-graphics Death Star plans we all know and love. Instead, they were the overly polite, colorful, holographic Return of the Jedi Death Star plans. I fear A New Hope is going to be tweaked further.

(2) John Williams' score is not as abundant as one might hope. In fact, as confirmed by some recent online reports, there's more than a little re-used music from Episode I playing during key scenes. Not re-recordings -- the actual original music from Episode I, recycled. Was Mr. Williams too busy writing embarrassing ersatz techno riffs for Minority Report? Suffice to say I'm in no hurry for the two-disc "Ultimate Edition" of this score.

(3) Anakin's mother sort of flops over comedically when she dies.

(4) Padme, for all her professed love of peace and justice, seems mighty forgiving when Anakin recounts his act of genocide. In fact, she never mentions it afterward. At all.

(5) A little bit of Jar-Jar is like a little bit of third-degree burn; it really hurts about the same. At least he's the patsy.

(6) Christopher Lee is great in the movie, but he should never, ever be seen riding an anti-gravity Honda scooter. I kept looking for his golf clubs.

(7) "Say, Master Yoda! Someone inside the Jedi Order has covered up the existence of an entire planet! Think you might want to investigate that?" "Investigate Obi-Wan can by himself. Bemused I shall seem, and then return to teaching little children I shall. That important it cannot be."

(8) The entire Naboo interlude really could have been consolidated into the flight to Tatooine. At least then these profoundly dysfunctional children could have fallen in love while on the lam and under duress and grieving and bickering — a vastly sexier and more human courtship than the dramatic dead stop on Padme's Maxfield-Parrish-by-way-of-Dinotopia homeworld.

________

And finally, The Peanut Gallery: Comments of varying length overheard and solicited (from friends and the hoi polloi) as I left the packed preview screening

"R.H.," lesbian filmmaker: [dripping with sarcasm] "I really loved the fight between Count Chocula and the puppet."

"A.C.," test pilot: "I went in with such low expectations that I didn't hate it outright — but at the same time, all the basic failings from Return of the Jedi to now are there — bad dialogue, bad plot mechanics, all that rot. But all the ingredients are at least in the pie. Still, I thought Anakin should have been more like an evil Han Solo, or a charismatic Satan; in retrospect, Hayden Christensen is terrible. But the Star Wars faithful will walk out thinking they got what they wanted — there's lots of action and Ewan McGregor is cool and Natalie looked hot. Lucas is playing to the groundlings. People will go see it five or six times. It's not a good Star Wars movie, but it will do until one comes along. [pause] Though, come to think of it, there was a point before the third act kicked in that I kind of power-napped."

"Mr. Sox Fox," comics shopkeeper: "I went into this movie expecting nothing at all. After the crushing disappointment that was Phantom Menace, I decided not to even hope that Clones would be any better; even when early reviews started coming out positive, I isolated myself from all expectation of non-sucking. I went in prepared for the worst. And you know what? I didn't hate it. This is a big, fun movie that's actually growing on me; I'll see it again, and pay for the experience. I'll address only two of the criticisms I've heard: that it has a slow middle (while Anakin is romancing Padme and Kenobi is doing his investigator shtick) and that the plot is too complicated.... I simply don't see either of those two things as being a drawback. The story is complex — great! And the pacing slows down in the middle — which it really needs to do. Frankly, this movie is as good as any of the Star Wars films — yes, and I mean that pointedly towards Star Wars (Ep. IV, that is) and Empire. Look at Empire in particular — the plot hurtles from one locale to another, the action is split up, and even Empire is stuffed to the gunwales with plot holes, ludicrous set pieces and big cheesy monsters. What part of 'this is a Star Wars movie' did you not understand? Clones is loads of fun and piled high with cool stuff — and it doesn't have anything as show-stoppingly embarrassing as Jar Jar's antics in Menace, the 'Wacky Racers' shtick of the pod race or even the Ewoks. To counter the heapin' helpings of hate that will no doubt be ladled out by the film-sophisticate set, I'd offer a main course of 'go see it, fanboy' — and a side dish of 'and stop pretending the rest of the movies were Citizen Kane.'"

And finally, a longish rant from dear friend Alina DeVries — a rant I was compelled to transcribe and include here in its near-entirety because it segues nicely into my final point:

"There is no sense of awe or reason in the film! From Lucas' inability to show off a multitude of aliens in the new cantina scene to his inability to suggest geography in the first chase to his inability to pay off all that 'be mindful of your lightsaber' dialogue, the film doesn't follow up on its set-up beats! Anakin's dialogue is nearly schizophrenic at times — but instead of showing his schizophrenia, Anakin just says he's troubled, over and over!

"And Padme and Anakin's relationship is more discussed than shown — the two have absolutely no chemistry together! It smacks of first draft! There aren't any characters to latch onto! Even the bad guys are poorly drawn — and no one seems to have any clear-cut goals, so there's no sense of victory or defeat! And there's way too many "in the nick of time" moments that aren't set up properly! There are literally too many gaping inconsistencies to name! And Attack of the Clones features no clone attack!

[I pressed Alina on that last point until she admitted, "Well, not much of a clone attack, anyway." Back to her rant. — A.DuP.]

"Structurally, Lucas was drawing parallels to Empire — but this is the first-draft version of it, without the sex, drama or poetry! And characters are shown repeatedly doing things that contradict the value system of the other movies! When the writers can't think of a way to get out of things, they throw away what we've learned from the other four films!

"For example? At one point, R2-D2 flies; um, wouldn't that ability have come in handy in the Dagobah swamps? Or when he was on Jabba's sail barge? And the Jedi Knights are shown enjoying violence — which, if memory serves, means you're giving in to the Dark Side, right?

"And that last sequence where Yoda fights, and he's flummoxed by a large pillar at one point? That's retarded! Yoda himself has told us that "size matters not"! The new, revised mythology paints the Jedi as nimrods!

"The last battle adds a very important, traumatic event to the mythology — one paralleling a similar event in Empire — but it's just sort of thrown away to make way for Yoda! It's a passing thought!

"And Jar-Jar? Good Christ! Okay, the audience didn't like him in the first film — but what Lucas does to him in this movie betrays everything the entire first trilogy stood for! One of the most important messages of the series is to never judge characters by their appearances, as they might have hidden depths or purposes — like the Ewoks. But here, Lucas has turned a good-hearted but slightly dumb character into the being who kicks off the fall of the Republic! Those who hated him may enjoy this turnabout — and I think that's why it was included — but again, it's at the price of Lucas's major theme in the original trilogy!

"A lot of people will forgive the film because of the old 'it's Star Wars defense — and that doesn't cut it. The film doesn't work on any of the levels that make great movies great — which the first three did and then some. There's no sense of build-up, of climax, of characters, of story arc. So it's never really a movie — just a collection of scenes that don't add up! And when you have all the time, money, and power to make a film exactly how you want to — and Lucas does — how excusable are these faults?"

________

Sigh. Alexandra here. I can't say I agree with every point of Alina's rant, but I can write with confidence that she will speak for a vocal subsection of the Star Wars community.

I can also say this for Alina: Alina still cares. I no longer care to that degree. If these last two Star Wars movies have taught me anything, it's that all my prior rantings about Star Wars needing to be mythologically and thematically coherent and profound no longer apply. Those rantings were, in retrospect, most likely the justifications of a young adult who wanted to explain why she'd liked a pulp sci-fi/fantasy series so emphatically — and who gleefully adopted as her own the "Power of Myth" mental gymnastics handed to her on a platter by Joseph Campbell and the Lucasfilm P.R. machine.

That said, when I came to the above understanding and relaxed my standards a bit — right around that Mysterious Island shot — I quite enjoyed the final moments of Attack of the Clones for the pulpy pastiche that they are. Take that for what you will.

All grown up now, apparently, and going spoiler-free for Episode III,

— Alexandra DuPont dupont@dvdjournal.com










Readers Talkback

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  • May 9, 2002, 3:32 a.m. CST

    OHMYGAWD! IT'S ALL OVER! STAR WARS IS DEAD!!!

    by Guitarman555

    Wargh!

  • May 9, 2002, 3:41 a.m. CST

    yup, that about kills it

    by jbreen

    If Ms DuPont is on the money here - and since these echo many of the problems of the first flick I can't see whay she isn't - then what a sad, sad end to the series. I say end, because it really doesn't make one wish desperately for the third film of this opening trilogy. Worst still, it casts a shadow over the 'classic' trilogy. Why couldn't George spend more time developing the script and keeping the story thematically consistent? And hand over the directorial reins to someone else? And why does he now seem to have a gift for casting crap actors in lead roles? Okay, that ain't all that accurate, but this is Anakin's story, and the kid from the last film was painful and it sounds like reaction to Hayden is not one of 'My God, a new star is in the Heavens!'. Oh dear.

  • May 9, 2002, 3:44 a.m. CST

    Not so kind

    by Darth Melkor

    She didn't much care for it did she? Of course everyone will jump all over this saying SW sucks and so on even though about 3 inches to the left on the main page there's a completely different opinion. That will be overlooked though cause it's not the opinion that matters. Only the bad matters right? Variety and Rolling Stone and probably 90% of reviewers so far saying it's great doesn't matter at all. Just the few and far between bad reviews. Those are the correct ones. Am I right?

  • May 9, 2002, 3:49 a.m. CST

    Lots more reviews

    by Greymarch

    There are about 50 reviews on the net so far. 35 of them are excellent, 10 are mediocre, and 5 are down right terrible. One thing that EVERY review has stated is that AOTC is better than TPM. So far AOTC seems be getting more good reviews than TPM did. ATOC will be good, but not quite as good as the original trilogy. One other thing. I have yet to read a positive review from a woman. Do women not get Star Wars?

  • May 9, 2002, 3:52 a.m. CST

    Hey...TPM is watchable. If AOTC is better, screw em

    by PharaohX

    So what if parts of it blow? I'll take Attack of the Clones any day over Spiderdipshit.

  • of course the acting is wooden and sucks, "M'Lady", "Some...day...I...illl..be...the....most...power...ful...Jedi", "AnNiE!?!?!?", "Negoccciiiaaations". Too bad, at least Dec 18th is less than 45 days from 6 months away.

  • May 9, 2002, 4:08 a.m. CST

    Okay.......

    by laguna_loire

    People, this is someone's one view on the movie. I'm seeing it, I have my tickets, and I don't care what anyone thinks!! Its MY opinion that counts to ME. Why don't we all take this perspective instead of trying to be so damned pessimistic?

  • May 9, 2002, 4:08 a.m. CST

    Better than TPM...but thats not saying much is it?

    by Antiriad

    Lucas REALLY should have let someone else direct (Bring back irvin Kirshner!) whilst he concentrates on PLOT!

  • May 9, 2002, 4:13 a.m. CST

    The Backlash kicks in...before the Movie Begins!

    by MentallyMariah

    Wow, it's going to be a Cruel, Cruel Summer!

  • Hmm... parallel to Empire? I bet Anakin gets his hand chopped off by Dooku or something like that.

  • May 9, 2002, 5:04 a.m. CST

    We're all just growing up

    by Maggie

    It's like realizing that Santa Clause isn't real. We're finally realizing that Star Wars isn't so great. I watched it again recently. I'm referring to Ep. IV. The dialogue is bad. The acting is okay. The story moves along very well and the action scenes are awesome. The music rules. In fact, I'd credit John Williams for the success of these movies more than anyone else. Thnk about it. Rescore the movie with Lalo Schifrin music in your head. Not so hot, eh? Basically, the movies are popcorn fare and nothing more. One thing in particular that struck me as odd now that never bothered me before is that there are long scenes where Han Solo is having a conversation with a giant growling bigfoot who only responds to Han by grunting and barking. We completely accepted that when we were kids. Looking at it now, it seems funny. What would happen if you replaced Chewie with the dog from Frasier? It would seem ridiculous. Because it is. I'm sorry. All you people who think these movies had some prfound meaning should watch them again. They have people giving bad lines to creatures who growl back. Yes, they have the whole good vs. evil thing and Lucas was clearly dealing with some parently abandonment issues in the first and current trilogy. But their really just fun movies. Empire is still the best film of them all thematically speaking. Why? Because of the training scenes on Dagobah. Why? Because we see Luke grow as a character. None of the other films really have anyone making a great leap in who they are as people. Lucas should really look at those scenes before he writes Ep. 3!

  • May 9, 2002, 5:15 a.m. CST

    Expectations

    by Vitaly Chernobyl

    Expectations are a wondeful thing. Greta to have them, can lead to joyous happiness or unbounded sadness. However, as a critic, a touch more impartiality would be nice. I can't accept a review from someone who admits that the original trilogy are some classic movies and holds them in such high regard. Yes, yes, I too, blah blah, toys, blah blah, cinema, blah blah, duvet cover. The one thing I took from Ms DuPonts review was her friend saying that the original movies are not Citizen Kane. They aren't. You have one charismatic actor in Harrison Ford and some excellent British actors featuring in supporting roles. That's it. Plot holes abound, set-up is never followed up on and why does Leia fall in love with Han anyways? It doesn't matter. At the end of the day, you bring your own emotional input to a movie and get the rewards you seek. Ms. DuPont is very jaded at this stage - be warned cynicism is not to be envied or justified and it is most definitely not an art-form. I read her review of TPM and the contradictions are rife. AOTC was never going to live up to her expectations because she was never going to let it. Eitherways, Lucas cannot win this battle - he puts in Jedi's doing Jedi things and it's not enough. Yoda kicks ass, but not is not intelligent enough. The plot is too complicated, but then TPM was too simple. Ah well, I would not like to walk a mile in anyones shoes who feels so disappointed in a movie. Seeing it on Sat., press screening and looking forward to it. Just hope no elf says "You shall be the Attack of the Clones"

  • May 9, 2002, 5:19 a.m. CST

    Thank you for an honest and objective review.

    by Scarecrow_

    One of the best, most even and professionally composed I've ever read on this half-arsed site.

  • May 9, 2002, 5:28 a.m. CST

    From what I've read...

    by Vicconius

    ... the movie can be summed up as one kickass movie, slow in the first half, the romance will be schlocky, but from then on it's an amazing rollercoaster ride. Sounds like I can get into it. One thing I've noticed about the reviews so far is that the cultured British reviewers seem to love it to death, but some Americans have an unreasonable outlook on this movie. A standard that can't be met. Eating their own young. Maybe it's just elites trying to portray themselves as being above the commercial fray. I think a lot of people need to remove the pole from their butts and just enjoy it like you did 20 years ago.

  • May 9, 2002, 5:29 a.m. CST

    "It smacks of first draft!"

    by Scarecrow_

    Yes! Thank you! That's it! That's exactly what I felt when I read the script in the 'Art Of' book - I just couldn't put my finger on it. Glaring plot holes, contrived plot devices, weak dialogue. It just felt like Lucas had written it out and just said 'that'll do, on with the effects.' and nobody at Lucasfilm had the balls to say, 'Actually, George, it still needs a lot of work.' And despite what anyone says, I simply can't picture the fight between Dooku and Yoda at the end as nothing short of ridiculous. I'm expecting to laugh derisively, not gape in awe at Yoda's supposed 'masterly skills'.

  • May 9, 2002, 5:32 a.m. CST

    These are George Lucas' films not mine

    by trankscuzzball

    Star Wars is the creation of George Lucas and he is the only one that need's to be pleased with his creation. I kept hearing/reading Ewan McGregor bemoan the title AOTC and that TPM was "flat", this is george lucas' homage to the serials of a bygone era, maybe it's a cultural disconnect with the Scot and he's just got to see these film as so entirely serious he loses the fun in them. The Phantom Menace is the setup a young boy who is having fun and he has yet to encounter pain and guilt, look at the movies they are reflection of the past trilogy, the first and second chapters are adventure and one you are left with a very ominous feeling in this case it is EPISODE III and The Empire Strikes Back. Jar Jar binks is the comic relief but that doesn't mean he can't fit into the star wars trilogy. He farts that happens in real life doesn't it? Big deal and he gets entangled with parts of a battle droid and clumsily destroys his surrounding enemy. I don't see him as some ludicrous stereotype or the the viceroys for that matter and yes they speak with a japanese/english dialect so what, i say!

  • That Du'pont liked and defended Pearl Harbor. That in itself makes a mockery of her review and make's any reservations she has about Clones as not valid and worthy of comtempt. But thats just my opinion of course....

  • May 9, 2002, 5:44 a.m. CST

    Oh yeah, I forgot to add

    by Vicconius

    That all the reviews so far to a man (and woman), whether a negative scathing review or not, say that Yoda's final scenes are pretty much beyond reproach. Some are even talking best supporting actor Oscar. Again, some people should bend over, and possibly with the help of a friend or loved one, remove the palmtree trunk from their buttocks.

  • May 9, 2002, 6:20 a.m. CST

    Mysterious Ways

    by Vitaly Chernobyl

    Ahh, the silent majority have spoken, and they are all against Star Wars!! First off, you have Ms DuPont's friend Alina, who represents a large portion of the Star Wars Community. Then you have Mr. Thomson, who obviously feels he speaks for the Star Wars faithful in requesting GL to do better by us. Then you have Gen. Custer and all his mates who just knew, from watching trailers, mind, that this is going to be bad. Well, I for one am joining the boycott!! Heavens to Murgatroide, break out the placards and lets picket the cinemas like we did in them good ole days for Showgirls and the Last Temptation of Christ. My favourite though is the Entertainment Weekly review that says the movie isn't entertaining!! Yes, now that Star Wars isn't entertaining, what's the point? Get the shotgun, ma...

  • May 9, 2002, 6:28 a.m. CST

    i like Alexandra's review! she rocks!

    by mooncake

    but i got no more confidence in lucas. AOTC will most likely SUCK!

  • May 9, 2002, 6:42 a.m. CST

    iv sucked, v was nice, vi was enjoyable

    by reverendheresy

    am i the only one who thought a new hope was crap? i have a feeling lucas is purposely following his old formula for starwars. examples: ep 4, "must... stay... awake and... finish movie... god... so boring... <insert snore>" ep 5, "not as bad, but still had sleepiness" ep 6, "teddy-bears are fun, the climax was very enjoyable indeed" now for the new ones: ep 1, "boring, sleepiness and crap" ep 2, "by judging ep5, slight sleepiness but enjoyable" ep 3, "by judging ep6, best of the prequels, yum" christ, why does sw suck so bad? lucas, lynch yourself now, please for the love of god and all that is holy!!!!! -reverend~heresy-

  • May 9, 2002, 7:09 a.m. CST

    Alexandra - some guys here are saying you LIKED Pearl Harbour!!

    by ol' painless

    I mean . . . Pearl HARBOUR!! PEARL HARBOUR???? . . . brow sweating . . . stomach . . . . HEAVING . . . Ben Affleck . . . . EMOTING . . . . Michael Bay . . . DIRECTING . . . with all the subtelty of a workman operating a jackhammer in the street outside my house at 6am on a Sunday morning . . . (deep breaths) . . . . whoo, feeling a little better . . . . wait a minute . . . JOSH HARTNETT!!! grooooooopppp HOOOORRRRRR RAAAASAAGGHH mmmmmmBBB BBBBBAAAAAA . . . . ooo . . . ooooooogh ****flush***

  • May 9, 2002, 7:18 a.m. CST

    but I still liked this review

    by ol' painless

    and thank you for the heads up. I think a few folk have been getting a little too excited about AOTC around here, and it&#39;s good to get the opinion of someone who doesn&#39;t see the outside world through the eyeholes of a stormtrooper mask. As long as it&#39;s not as bad as that stinkin&#39; pile of juvenile chunder, TPM, the only film made that appeared to have no actual Director, just some guy in flannel who hung around the set avoiding eye contact.

  • May 9, 2002, 7:18 a.m. CST

    Ah ha! I have rumbled Lucas&#39;s plan!

    by Chilli Kramer

    First he leaks the film to reviewers he suspects will praise the film to the skies - like Harry. Then there is the inevitable backlash....BUT THEN - there is a backlash to the backlash! So we&#39;re all hopeful the film &#39;won&#39;t be as bad as everybody says&#39;, and go see it. ------I doubt Lucas is really doing this deliberately - why bother - but it&#39;s what happened with TPM, and it&#39;s happening again here. These movies are the most critic proof ever.

  • May 9, 2002, 7:50 a.m. CST

    Jesus Christ...

    by MrBabbage

    I went to see AOTC at a preview screening at Odeon Leicester Square in London yesterday. I am still buzzing having seen this movie and the bunch of us who saw it are still talking about it and looking forwards to the opening day. Yes there are criticisms about the movie - Padme survives two massive falls (one of which she survives by landing on her crotch!!!) which brought hoots from the audience, C3PO&#39;s one-liners are sub-Roger Moore James Bond... but the fact is... it&#39;s a STAR WARS movie. The spirit of the original trilogy is back, the cuteness of Jedi and TPM is all but totally gone, the action is breathtaking, Christopher Lee&#39;s character is brilliant, Obi-Wan is a true hero. The movie is DARK. Darker than Empire even. But at the end we came out of the cinema exhilirated, not disappointed. We certainly didn&#39;t start spouting pretentiously about the value systems of the Star Wars Trilogy. These films aren&#39;t the be all and end all of my life - they&#39;re a treasured part of my childhood - and AOTC took me back there but with all the advances Lucas has brought to 21st century cinema. I&#39;d suggest you compare and contrast these reviews with Moriarty&#39;s comments. What he said pretty much sums up the feeling of the audience yesterday. None of us claim to be &#39;auteurs&#39; in the way the reviewers above seem to think they are, we&#39;re just regular guys after a great night out and AOTC delivers big style.

  • May 9, 2002, 8:36 a.m. CST

    THIS CHICK IS NUTS!!

    by KAKALABA

    THIS GIRL COULDN&#39;T REVIEW A MOVIE IF HE LIFE DEPENDED ON IT AND REMEMBER FOLKS TRASHING A FILM IS MORE FUN(AND BETTER READING) THAN A GOOD REVIEW!!

  • May 9, 2002, 8:54 a.m. CST

    Just don&#39;t care anymore!

    by Kid Z

    ...Maybe I&#39;ll see it when it premieres on the SuperStation 5 years from now...

  • May 9, 2002, 8:59 a.m. CST

    alexandra dupont can fucking kiss my ass...

    by elwen

    nuff said

  • May 9, 2002, 9 a.m. CST

    Pearl Harbor?

    by Metsys

    I hated Pearl Harbor but have noticed that a lot of women love that movie. It really is a chick flick under all the action. What woman wouldn&#39;t want two attractive guys fighting for there love. Star Wars is definitely geared more towards a male crowd.

  • May 9, 2002, 9:05 a.m. CST

    It&#39;s not stalking, it&#39;s dark Jedi mind-clouding...

    by brotrek

    ...or maybe Annie&#39;s "midichloreans" have retroviral capability, and they take over Padme from within...

  • May 9, 2002, 9:08 a.m. CST

    "You are beaten. It is useless to resist"

    by Otto Parts

    Oh fuck. This isn&#39;t good, because I agreed with many of the things which Alex wrote about TPM. But, thankfully, not all. And if I&#39;m going to be brutally honest, anyone who saw TPM and expected the next two episodes to be miraculously different is kiodding themselves a bit. This movie sounds pretty much what I secretly thought it would be: better than TPM, but not as good as the best the OT had to offer (which IMO is Empire). As we all know, there are a single route cause for this decline in "heart and soul": Lucas doesn&#39;t like delegating anymore, he wants to be the sole instigator of virtually everything which happens in these prequels. While there is the argument (with which I don&#39;t TOTALLY disagree) that as the whole thing is Lucas&#39; idea, he SHOULD be the one with who dictates what happens, this argument doesn&#39;t entirely stand up to scrutiny. Episodes V and VI were helped immeasurably by the contributions of people like Kirschner[sp?] and Kasdan. Just re-watch the Luke/Vader battle in ESB, take any minor shot, such as the one where Luke is looking around for his enemy, and we suddenly have a shot from just above and behind Vader&#39;s right shoulder, as he approaches the young hero. It&#39;s an insignificant shot, but it has more style than Lucas could have produced in the same scene. "The force is with you, but you are not a Jedi yet"...These lines have real resonance, something largely missing from TPM (best line? "we&#39;ll handle this" "we&#39;ll take the long way"; or possibly Watto&#39;s "I hope you didn&#39;t kill anyone I know to get this (laughs)" these are hardly earth-shattering). Readers of UK mag Empire will have seen that the "I love you" "I know" line from ESB was IMPROVISED, Ford didn&#39;t come up with it &#39;til they&#39;d tried loads of variations; he was originally supposed to say "I love you too". That was probably what Lucas wanted. Instead, we have a truly memorable line which they were able to reference in Jedi, to great effect, thus improving BOTH films, if only slightly. Alex&#39;s point about pulpiness is well made. I always felt that the SW series was about pulp sci-fi anyway; let&#39;s not forget that he made these movies because he couldn&#39;t get the rights to Flash Gordon of all things. This time next week I will have watched the movie (possibly twice), so I will leave the final decision to myself, but one thing I am fairly certain of is that this will be a Star Wars movie like no other. What do you lot think of the "Profession" trailers. I love the Mace and the Artoo ones (I couldn&#39;t care less about the flying thing - why would it[or he, if you must] need to fly on Jabba&#39;s barge? or on Dagobah? did you not realise that something was TRYING TO EAT artoo?), but my absolute favourite single shot is at the end of the "clonetrooper" ad, when we just see a confused shot of several troopers, and the sound of, well, the sound of death in the form of about a zillion laser guns. I have NEVER heard a sound like that in a SW movie!!!

  • May 9, 2002, 9:21 a.m. CST

    give me a break

    by bonusfrag

    Being as that I&#39;ve yet to see the movie. I can&#39;t offer any kind of counter arguement against DuPonts review (if you want to call it that). All I can say is, reading the review was 10 minutes of my life that I&#39;ll never get back.

  • May 9, 2002, 9:33 a.m. CST

    Like fingernails grinding down a chalkboard

    by amurillo

    So the nay-sayers have struck again. Every one of you morons out there that are actually trying to keep people from seeing this movie will fail miserably. This movie will be huge and most people will love it. In fact, most of the toughest critics in Hollywood and abroad have rated the movie very highly. So who should we listen to? A bunch of geeks who like to play dress-up on weekends, or professional critics. I think I know the answer. And all of you that go into this movie determined to hate it, or determined to compare it with Lord of the Rings and Spider-Man, need to seriously get a life. These are MOVIES!!!! They are meant to be enjoyed!! They are not meant to instill a vicious sense of territoriality (sorry for the big word) as a lot of idiots have reacted. I LOVED Lord of the Rings, I enjoyed Spider-Man immensely, and I am sure I will love AOTC. In the eyes of many idiots out there, that probably makes me some kind of a heretic, worthy of being burned at the stake. I prefer medium-rare, if you don&#39;t mind. Even more shockingly, I also happen to love the Matrix. So all of you out there who are determined to criticize this movie, who are determined to piss on everyone else&#39;s parade just for the hell of it, need to shut up and go back to playing their overused tools. Maybe AOTC won&#39;t break Spider-Man&#39;s opening-weekend gross. I say, WHO CARES????

  • May 9, 2002, 9:38 a.m. CST

    Tenguman: how stunningly insightful you are!!

    by BarrelRider

    I mean SHIT dude, ya really think so? Hey, everybody, this guy reckons Anakin gets his hand chopped off in this episode! What an amazing piece of prediction! I mean, it&#39;s not as if everyone else worked this out TWO YEARS AGO. Sure, DuPont didn&#39;t like it, but I used the link to her review of TPM, and found that while she made a few valid points, most of what she said WAS a little nitpicky. And I&#39;ve only recently picked up on the fact that many people felt the same way about ROTJ as they did about TPM. This explains why I couldn&#39;t bring myself to hate TPM with quite so much vitriol as some could. I loved ROTJ, saw it on, like, my 8th birthday and absolutely loved it. The idea that some people fell out of love with SW before the first trilogy was even finished is a joke. Stay stuck in 1981 if you like, people, but why don&#39;t you just abandon this series like you should have after Jedi? After The third Batman movie, I didn&#39;t go to see the fourth "just to check" if it was going to suddenly improve dramatically. God dang, some people have too much time on their hands

  • May 9, 2002, 9:39 a.m. CST

    Alexandra is right, but so is Mr. Babbage

    by Silvio Dante

    Ms. Dupont is getting a beating for speaking her mind and having valid points. Her reaction is intellectual and intellectually valid. When I walked out of the screening yesterday, that&#39;s pretty much how I felt (even though I can&#39;t put it in such good writing). But the talk back-ID Mr. Babbage has a point too. All the things I loved about AOTC are aimed for the emotions and senses. No, I&#39;m not talking about those corny love scenes or the goings-on between the good ole folks at Lars moisture farm and a certain camp of Tusken Raiders. I mean the over-all feel of the film. Music. Production design. Sound effects. It FEELS like Star Wars, even though badly executed one. Lucas is a sloppy director but great visualist, I can&#39;t get the images out of my head and at least at that level I too was taken back to my childhood. Trust your feeling on this one. Trying to dissect AOTC on intellectual level is a fool&#39;s errand and you&#39;ll get more out of it by accepting it as corny Flash Gordon/Buck Rogers comic strip made into cinema with slight leanings towards californian new-age religions.

  • May 9, 2002, 9:58 a.m. CST

    Intellectual Review?? My Arse

    by Vitaly Chernobyl

    How on Earth a review whose first three main "bad points" are like those contained above be deemed to be intelligent??? These use a Hologram for the DS plans rather than vector graphics. For shame!! Someone fire Dennis Muren. John Williams uses his own music as a homage to the OT characters during this movie?? The thief. Someone fire him. Pernilla August does a hokey death scene?? How dare she. Why do I have this mental image of Ms DuPont and her "friends" sitting around a coffee table, ala Reservoir Dogs, discussing the movie? All with their cutsey names, like Mr. Sock Puppet. None of them wanting to lose face by admitting they like a movie aimed at kids, which would be just, like, so uncool, dude, especially since Kafka and Tolstoi wouldn&#39;t have liked it. Thinking that you are an intellectual doesn&#39;t mean you can&#39;t like popular things.

  • May 9, 2002, 10:13 a.m. CST

    I am convinced there is no pleasing these folks so why bother ta

    by matrix_sux

    As far as I remember ALOT of the reviews for the OT were skewed towards the negative while popular opinion said otherwise. The bulk of the folks doing movie reviews have yet to create a body of cinamatic work something to garner any acclaime, except for Roger Ebert. Say what you want about the guy, for good or bad, he actually done something. So who are these folks doing reviews? What&#39;s their resume like to say that their opinion should hold sway over us? Failed writers? Folks working on their first screenplay? Students just out of film school? Who? What are their credentials? Aside from SW movies, what movies do they hold in high regard? I hold more stock in folks who actually watch movies for the sake of entertainment as opposed to finding fault with everything. And the part about Yoda being flummoxed by a large pillar, from the screening I saw Dooku used it as a diversion for his escape. God lord, Yoda had to fight momentum on that one as opposed to pulling an x-wing that was already settled at the bottom of a swamp. And yes, in TESB, Yoda did give a little sigh of exertion, after being alive for 900 years, give the gnome a break! :) And how &#39;bout "There&#39;s no sense of build-up, of climax" Oh and I supposed there is a cut of Empire out there where Han gets rescued? Please. For every arguement that was set forth in the above article, anyone here here can post a counter arguement to the point where it gets circular. Is this a sign of the times? I hope not, but then again when I noticed that some college classes that were originally under the heading of "film appreciation" later morphed into "film criticism" should have set off a warning bell

  • May 9, 2002, 10:16 a.m. CST

    The thing that gets me...

    by MrBabbage

    Reading this kind of grasping interpretation as seen in these reviews drives me crazy. They&#39;re expecting powerhouse Oscar-winning performances from a series that brought us Mark Hamill whining about going to Toshi station to pick up some power converters. It&#39;s Star Wars for heaven&#39;s sake! Now, there were plenty of problems with the Phantom Menace - Jar Jar was excruciating, the story was overly elaborate, Jake Lloyd was (and let&#39;s be generous) absolutely shit. AOTC has much improved acting, a far tighter script, a near zero "cute" factor, and brilliant action. And I mean brilliant. Gladiator&#39;s arena battles better? *smirk* sh&#39;yeah right. If you&#39;re looking for deeper meaning in a Star Wars movie, perhaps you&#39;re one of those deluded individuals who signed themselves off as "Jedi" on the census forms and are in proud possession of a replica stormtrooper outfit. What irritates me the most is some of the reaction here. "Oh TPM was shit, and because person X says the faults are the same, ergo AOTC will be too." Well, check out the movie for yourself (and let&#39;s face facts, however many bad reviews you read you WILL go see it). Personally my faith in the series has been restored by Episode 2 and I have my ticket booked for the opening night ready to see it again.

  • May 9, 2002, 10:22 a.m. CST

    AOTC

    by alcester

    sounds like it will be like most CGI movies, after it is over it won&#39;t get a second thought.

  • May 9, 2002, 10:22 a.m. CST

    Actually...

    by VonSpark

    ...of all the reviews I have seen on this site recently (including by Moriarity and Harry&#39;s heartfelt Spiderman review, which was seemingly TOO honest for some of the more reactionary of the talkbackers)I find this review from Alexandra cohesive, well-thought, and most of all, FAIR.--------------------------------------Someone mentioned sarcastically that, in so many words, that Alexandra was moved by the "love story" in Pearl Harbor. Well, IF she can be characterized like that based solely on her sex( which is of course, to anyone with scant awareness, ridiculous) I&#39;d say that&#39;s a POOR sign for much of the emotional center of this movie. -------------------------------------------------------------- I imagine though, that this review will not prevent anyone from reporting to the theatres like doomed child-soldiers summoned to George Lucas&#39; draft board. Hell, many posting here already conduct themselves like this is some kind of holy war. Seems to me those draftees are headed to Vietman; a battle that cannot be won, and a battle being fought for unknowable reasons.---------------------------------------------------I made a promise to myself after suffering through the Phantom Menace (I felt more menaced by "the cavity creeps" from the old Crest toothpaste ads) that I would only return to one of these "event movies" directed by Lucas if only ONE of two things happened: One, no Jar Jar, and TWO, the movie seemed that it would not further besmirch my warm and wonderful memories of the films that came before.--------------------------------------------------------------Sigh. Looks like I stay home or better yet, go see a film that won&#39;t piss me off, insult my intelligence, or smack of the hubris of an ego gone wrong. There ARE other movies to see, even one or two out now worth seeing twice or more.----------------------------------------------------------------Thanks Alexandra, for your honesty in the face of what must be MASSIVE pressure to put the best possible spin on things. If you DID put polish it up, however, we&#39;re ALL in trouble!

  • May 9, 2002, 10:33 a.m. CST

    Why Star Wars will make money...no matter what

    by MOSDEF

    Of the 3 or 4 negative reviews I&#39;ve read out of 20 to 25 one thing is evident. EVERYONE says they&#39;ll see it again. CHA-CHING

  • May 9, 2002, 10:36 a.m. CST

    Why has Entertainment Weekly launched a Smeer campaign?

    by MOSDEF

    If you noticed EW has already launched a smeer campaign against Episode II. I&#39;ve never seen them do this with any other film. Now they&#39;re comparing it to Spider-Man. And is it me, or when it comes to Star Wars everyone&#39;s a critic. Geesh, no film series could stand up to this kind of scrutiny, much less a Flash Gordon inspired Popcorn flick.

  • May 9, 2002, 10:48 a.m. CST

    YOU GEEKS!

    by Jakolantern

    OK, I&#39;m a huge SW fan. I grew up with it. But it&#39;s come time, after reading so many talkbacks, to join the frey. I think it&#39;s time to critique those that do to much critiquing. What is wrong with you people? It&#39;s a movie. That&#39;s it. Get over it. I love these movies. Heck, I even admit that I&#39;ve grown to enjoy TPM quite a bit. Love Qui-Gonn, he IS the foundation of all that will be. Bitch about the acting? WHEN WAS THE ACTING EVER GREAT IN SW? I know, Empire. Well, a lot of it was great, but Luke still whined like a little bitch in that movie. And Return of the Jedi, even Harrison Ford looked tired in that one, sleeping through his role as Han Solo (the smooch he gives Leia at the end is just way too corny, and you all know it!). So, we now have a new SW coming out, and every critic in the world seems to have seen it. The 1st batch of reviews were all extrordinarily positive. Then came round 2, or should I say, the backlash reviews. I read a few scathing ones. But the key word is FEW. You know, the ones that were done by non-fans who would rather be home clipping their toe nails instead of sitting for 2+ hours watching any sci-fi flick. I felt like a manic-depressant reading the back and forth of the latest round of reviews. But I keep coming back to numerous positive fan reviews. If it weren&#39;t for the fans, there would be no movie. TPM would never have grossed close to $1 billion worldwide (not bad for a &#39;terrible&#39; movie) if it weren&#39;t for the fans. And that&#39;s what this movie is, for the fans. I was talking to my roommate, who is also a huge fan, and pointed out some of the criticisms to him. Too much politics. Too much Jedi banter. Cheesey lines. Then he replied by saying that&#39;s what we love about these movies. The story. The special effects. The action. Not the acting. My point is, peoples, go see the movie before you judge it. It&#39;s not over. Go in with an open mind. Don&#39;t be predisposed to hating or loving it. And don&#39;t listen to the arthouse critics out there. If those people were so skilled and knew how to make good movies, they would be making them, not just writing about them. You want an honest review, go back to Harry&#39;s. He saw a rough cut and he is a fan. I think it&#39;s about as honest as you can get. -Jakolantern Fellow Film Geek :)

  • May 9, 2002, 10:57 a.m. CST

    Vitaly Chernobyl, you are funny as hell my man

    by vergence

    Dead on correct with your assesment of this chick&#39;s clique... A lesbian filmmaker (what is that...porn?) and a comic book store owner...jesus, i can smell the clove cigs from here. Additional, these hipsters seem to forget that they are the ones who love "camp" and "cheese" and "crap-that-sucks-so-bad-i-think-i-like-it". Unfortunately they haven&#39;t been able to turn this around on Star Wars. Sure the dialogue sucks...ok somethings don&#39;t make too much sense but this isn&#39;t "Nixon" ferchristsake! Take out the buttplug and appreciate something that can be bad and good at the same time. but then again this chick&#39;s main deal is getting people to read "her stuff" and thereby claiming some dominion over their minds, albiet for a short while. These people get off, not on the discussion of ideas in open debate, but on the fact that YOU read something SHE wrote. fucking pricks...

  • May 9, 2002, 11 a.m. CST

    Star Wars Mythology

    by whorton99

    When did everyone begin really talking about Star Wars as myth? It was after all three original films had been released and had time to resonate. I&#39;m tired of these reviews expecting instant mythology. Empire had one major plot twist which it contributed to the overall story arc - not every frame need to be filled with something dimwitted reviewers can point to as myth, myth, myth! Maybe we need to have all three prequels out there for a while before we can fairly judge how they work as a mythology.

  • May 9, 2002, 11:03 a.m. CST

    The music is poor

    by Mr. Impossible

    Really forgetable score from Williams. They should have just recycled the themes from the first three.

  • May 9, 2002, 11:12 a.m. CST

    A review of The Empire Strikes back

    by Chrissly

    &#39;The Empire Strikes Back&#39; Strikes a Bland Note By VINCENT CANBY he Force is with us but let&#39;s try to keep our heads. These things are certifiable: "The Empire Strikes Back," George Lucas&#39;s sequel to his "Star Wars," the biggest grossing motion picture of all time, has opened. On the basis of the early receipts, "The Empire Strikes Back" could make more money than any other movie in history, except, maybe, "Star Wars." It is the second film in a projected series that may last longer than the civilization that produced it. Confession: When I went to see "The Empire Strikes Back" I found myself glancing at my watch almost as often as I did when I was sitting through a truly terrible movie called "The Island." The Empire Strikes Back" is not a truly terrible movie. It&#39;s a nice movie. It&#39;s not, by any means, as nice as "Star Wars." It&#39;s not as fresh and funny and surprising and witty, but it is nice and inoffensive and, in a way that no one associated with it need be ashamed of, it&#39;s also silly. Attending to it is a lot like reading the middle of a comic book. It is amusing in fitful patches but you&#39;re likely to find more beauty, suspense, discipline, craft and art when watching a New York harbor pilot bring the Queen Elizabeth 2 into her Hudson River berth, which is what "The Empire Strikes Back" most reminds me of. It&#39;s a big, expensive, time-consuming, essentially mechanical operation. Gone from "The Empire Strikes Back" are those associations that so enchanted us in "Star Wars," reminders of everything from the Passion of Jesus and the stories of Beowulf and King Arthur to those of Tom Sawyer and Huck Finn, the Oz books, Buck Rogers and Peanuts. Strictly speaking, "The Empire Strikes Back" isn&#39;t even a complete narrative. It has no beginning or end, being simply another chapter in a serial that appears to be continuing not onward and upward but sideways. How, then, to review it? The fact that I am here at this minute facing a reproachful typewriter and attempting to get a fix on "The Empire Strikes Back" is, perhaps, proof of something I&#39;ve been suspecting for some time now. That is, that there is more nonsense being written, spoken and rumored about movies today than about any of the other so-called popular arts except rock music. The Force is with us, indeed, and a lot of it is hot air. Ordinarily when one reviews a movie one attempts to tell a little something about the story. It&#39;s a measure of my mixed feelings about "The Empire Strikes Back" that I&#39;m not at all sure that I understand the plot. That was actually one of the more charming conceits of "Star Wars," which began with a long, intensely complicated message about who was doing what to whom in the galactic confrontations we were about to witness and which, when we did see them, looked sort of like a game of neighborhood hide-and-seek at the Hayden Planetarium. One didn&#39;t worry about its politics. One only had to distinguish the good persons from the bad. This is pretty much the way one is supposed to feel about "The Empire Strikes Back," but one&#39;s impulse to know, to understand, cannot be arrested indefinitely without doing psychic damage or, worse, without risking boredom. This much about "The Empire Strikes Back" I do understand: When the movie begins, Han Solo (Harrison Ford) and Princess Leia (Carrie Fisher) and their gang are hanging out on a cold, snowy planet where soldiers ride patrols on animals that look like ostrich-kangaroos, where there are white-furred animals that are not polar bears and where Luke Skywalker (Mark Hamill) almost freezes to death. Under the command of Darth Vader, the forces of the Empire attack, employing planes, missiles and some awfully inefficient tanks that have the shape of armor-plated camels. Somehow Han Solo and Princess Leia escape. At that point Luke Skywalker flies off to find Yoda, a guru who will teach him more about the Force, Yoda being the successor to Ben (Obi-Wan) Kenobi (Alec Guinness), the "Star Wars" guru who was immolated in that movie but whose shade turns up from time to time in the new movie for what looks to have been about three weeks of work. As Han Solo and Princess Leia wrestle with the forces of darkness and those of a new character played by Billy Dee Williams, an unreliable fellow who has future sainthood written all over him, Luke Skywalker finds his guru, Yoda, a small, delightful, Muppet-like troll created and operated by Frank Oz of the Muppet Show. Eventually these two stories come together for still another blazing display of special effects that, after approximately two hours, leave Han Solo, Leia and Luke no better off than they were at the beginning. I&#39;m not as bothered by the film&#39;s lack of resolution as I am about my suspicion that I really don&#39;t care. After one has one&#39;s fill of the special effects and after one identifies the source of the facetious banter that passes for wit between Han Solo and Leia (it&#39;s straight out of B-picture comedies of the 30&#39;s), there isn&#39;t a great deal for the eye or the mind to focus on. Ford, as cheerfully nondescript as one could wish a comic strip hero to be, and Miss Fisher, as sexlessly pretty as the base of a porcelain lamp, become (is it rude to say?) tiresome. One finally looks around them, even through them, at the decor. If Miss Fisher does much more of this sort of thing, she&#39;s going to wind up with the Vera Hruba Ralston Lifetime Achievement Award. The other performers are no better or worse, being similarly limited by the not-super material. Hamill may one day become a real movie star, an identifiable personality, but right now it&#39;s difficult to remember what he looks like. Even the appeal of those immensely popular robots, C-3PO and R2-D2, starts to run out. In this context it&#39;s no wonder that Oz&#39;s contribution, the rubbery little Yoda with the pointy ears and his old-man&#39;s frieze of wispy hair, is the hit of the movie. But even he can be taken only in small doses, possibly because the lines of wisdom he must speak sound as if they should be sung to a tune by Jimmy Van Heusen. I&#39;m also puzzled by the praise that some of my colleagues have heaped on the work of Irvin Kershner, whom Lucas, who directed "Star Wars" and who is the executive producer of this one, hired to direct "The Empire Strikes Back." Perhaps my colleagues have information denied to those of us who have to judge the movie by what is on the screen. Did Kershner oversee the screenplay, too? Did he do the special effects? After working tirelessly with Miss Fisher to get those special nuances of utter blandness, did he edit the film? Who, exactly, did what in this movie? I cannot tell, and even a certain knowledge of Kershner&#39;s past work ("Eyes of Laura Mars," "The Return of a Man Called Horse," "Loving") gives me no hints about the extent of his contributions to this movie. "The Empire Strikes Back" is about as personal as a Christmas card from a bank. I assume that Lucas supervised the entire production and made the major decisions or, at least, approved of them. It looks like a movie that was directed at a distance. At this point the adventures of Luke, Leia and Han Solo appear to be a self-sustaining organism, beyond criticism except on a corporate level.

  • May 9, 2002, 11:12 a.m. CST

    and mr. VonSpark....

    by vergence

    ...exactly how big is your buttplug? "test pilot" haha ROTFLMAO....

  • May 9, 2002, 11:30 a.m. CST

    Sheesh, why do you people even BOTHER reading reviews???

    by minderbinder

    If it&#39;s positive "It&#39;s a plant!" If it&#39;s negative "These naysayers are determined to hate this" If they give details of what they didn&#39;t like "Why so nitpicky" If they just give an impression "Too vague" Poorly written "You&#39;re an idiot" Well written "Trying to hard to sound legitimate" "You went in expecting a bad movie" "You went in with unreachably high expectations" "Your inner child must be dead" "These movies are supposed to have bad acting/dialogue" "Leave your brain at the door" (so this rule means you should love Battlefield Earth as well?) "You&#39;re afraid of this movie threatening your favorite movie" "This movie was made for the fans...you&#39;re not a real fan" "You liked movie XYZ so you&#39;re an idiot" You people will obviously concoct ANY excuse to dismiss reviews you don&#39;t agree with (and at this point 99% of you have NOT seen the movie, so how the hell can you disagree with ANY review a week before the movie is released?). So why even bother? Just go see the movie. Or don&#39;t. Personally, I thought the review was interesting...I hope I don&#39;t agree but we&#39;ll see.

  • May 9, 2002, 11:36 a.m. CST

    JARJAR

    by SilentJames

    Please please please can we stop bashing Jar Jar,, O have read about 50 of these reviews, a vast majority say the movie is fantastic for all you non-believers--I saw more bed reviews for spider-man than AOTC--and in every single one they 1) Complain about Jar Jar in episode 1 20 are thankful he&#39;s not in much of this movie and 3) complain about himm being in epidode 2. No one likes him, we get it--he never really bothered me that much, nor did the ewoks-- but him being in the movie for such a short amount of time , even at all is no reason to bash Lucas or the movie as a whole! i didn&#39;t like the character of Miles archer--he was in the Maltese Falcon for like 5 mins (before he dies)buit I loved that movie all the same.

  • May 9, 2002, 11:42 a.m. CST

    So, let me get this straight.... You guys are pissed off because

    by Jesus Q Einstein

    I can&#39;t comment on the film (Like 99% of you guys), and i&#39;m clearly less excited about it than most of the other TBers, but I think it&#39;s kind of stupid to be pissed at a reviewer for saying what they thought of a movie rather than what you want to hear.

  • May 9, 2002, 11:54 a.m. CST

    Listen to what Minderbinder said

    by Listen Up

    He hits the nail right on the head, in fact I&#39;ll just repeat it here: "If it&#39;s positive "It&#39;s a plant!" If it&#39;s negative "These naysayers are determined to hate this" If they give details of what they didn&#39;t like "Why so nitpicky" If they just give an impression "Too vague" Poorly written "You&#39;re an idiot" Well written "Trying to hard to sound legitimate" "You went in expecting a bad movie" "You went in with unreachably high expectations" "Your inner child must be dead" "These movies are supposed to have bad acting/dialogue" "Leave your brain at the door" (so this rule means you should love Battlefield Earth as well?) "You&#39;re afraid of this movie threatening your favorite movie" "This movie was made for the fans...you&#39;re not a real fan" "You liked movie XYZ so you&#39;re an idiot" You people will obviously concoct ANY excuse to dismiss reviews you don&#39;t agree with (and at this point 99% of you have NOT seen the movie, so how the hell can you disagree with ANY review a week before the movie is released?). So why even bother? Just go see the movie. Or don&#39;t. Personally, I thought the review was interesting...I hope I don&#39;t agree but we&#39;ll see." Now re-read this at least five hundred times until it sinks in to your inch thick skulls. PS, I saw it on tues too and felt pretty much the same way.

  • May 9, 2002, 11:54 a.m. CST

    The Old "It&#39;s Star Wars" Defence

    by Damitol

    First - I look forward to A. DuPont&#39;s reviews. I don&#39;t always agree with them 100%, but they are well thought out and well written. This one is no exception. I come away with a clear understanding of her feelings about the film, but must take issue with her friend&#39;s (and it would seem her own as well) dismissal of the "It&#39;s Star Wars" defense. I think the one friend she quoted said it best: "stop pretending the rest of the movies were Citizen Kane." I saw ESB and ROTJ for the first time in a long time over the last two Thursdays on Fox. No one received an Oscar for acting award for good reason. Dialog was very clunky. "Just in time" escapes from death were too numerous and far fetched. Ewoks. Darth Vader was not really that menacing. Yoda *is* a muppet. And most important of all - I was no longer 12 years old. BUT----- they were Star Wars. They were fun. Watching with adult eyes that rolled on more than one occasion, I really saw that a big part of the charm was Lucas&#39; success in sticking to his original Mission Statement of paying homage to the old movie serials of his own childhood. The cheese factor is part of the appeal. The proper order of importance is 1) eye candy, 2) exciting set pieces and 3) overall story. If 12-year olds were allowed to write movie reviews, Phantom Menace would have needed to clean out the garage to make room for all of the "5 Star" and "A+" fawning. Instead, we get reviews from former 12 year olds that know all too well that a kid can&#39;t accidentally pilot a space ship into the main reactor core of the one correct ship, then accidentally hit the right button to blow it up and magically escape. It&#39;s impossible - so it&#39;s stupid and ruins the movie. Divorce yourself from expectations of life altering classic cinema and expect ATOC to be exactly what it is - a really cool roller coaster ride - and you will love it. When you leave the theater deadlines will still need to be met and bills will still need to be paid, but for two hours you will have fun. Alexandra Dupont should include one more item on her "What Wasn&#39;t So Good" List - No one wanted to play Dooku vs. Yoda with her when she got home, and she didn

  • May 9, 2002, 11:56 a.m. CST

    Don&#39;t put all of your trust into...

    by Intoxictd

    ...what other people say. Let&#39;s not forget that "movie reviewers", no matter how prominent they may be, are simply giving us THEIR OPINION. Don&#39;t go to a movie because someone says it&#39;s great, and don&#39;t not go to a movie because someone says that it is horrible. Go to a movie because you want to, and form your own opinion. I took a film class and learned all about what makes movies great. That ruined everything for me. I read all of the reviews of "The Phantom Menace", and went in with the expectation that the film sucked. Yes, I think that it did, but I think all of the negativity prepared me to only see it that way. After seeing it again many more times, I began to appreciate the good points of the movie, what it had succesfully accomplished. I rather like the movie now. (minus Jar-Jar). One major problem I think with the new trilogy is that everyone goes in with their expectations set WAY TO HIGH. Star Wars was unbeatable in the Original Trilogy&#39;s time era. Why??? Because it offered something nobody else could provide us with. A truly mythological storyline, great special effects, and exhilarating action. With its enormous success and How ILM has basically taken over the the "Visual Effects of Movie Making", other movies have now risen to the same level. However, Lucas pioneered this. How can you make something better than everything else if everyone is following in your footsteps? I&#39;m also hearing reviews stating that this movie does not have "the wit of Han Solo, or the genuine excitment of the Original Trilogy". ?????? If Lucas had made these movie just like the OT, I bet all the critics would complain how boring it was because of how he&#39;s "already done that"! The point of this commentary is that don&#39;t put all of your trust into critics. They are never truly satisfied. That is fine though, no one can make a perfect movie. Every movie has its bad points, BUT IT DOES NOT MEAN THAT YOU CAN"T ENJOY THE MOVIE. Most blockbusters are not given good reviews, but they are still entertaining. Let&#39;s also not forget how most of those "best picture" nominees the critics love so much, are rather boring movies. When you go see a movie, relax, forget what the critics said about it, and let the movie tell you it&#39;s story. Then decide from there if it was really worth the $10 you paid for it.

  • May 9, 2002, 12:01 p.m. CST

    Everybody chill...

    by rabid_republican

    Alexandra Du Pont (who I hope is nearly as hot as her cartoon rendering)has more often than not, been a voice of sound reason on this site, a ballance to our geek gushing. Now, having read Moriarty&#39;s sterling review, I&#39;m not sure what to think. I KNOW however I can do without her peanut gallery. As for those who are like Alina, caring is fine, but like that comic book store owner said, to walk into any SW flick and expect Citizen Kane is silly.____________________________Now, this probably will not forgive the horrid acting (as I mention in the Moriatry review TB, the absolute WORST part of the franchise), but in saying we&#39;re "overloaded in aliens" in a film such as this isn&#39;t a viable criticism. I&#39;ll admit Lucas has gone hog wild, where effects and sets are concerned, but then again that&#39;s what I expect, so I&#39;m not bothered in that regard. I&#39;ll spare you the rest of this tirade on expectations as that&#39;s pretty much what dominated my opinions of TPM. This should be no different, although I&#39;ll admit our expectations have changed, having been burned once prior. So many of us are like timid animals, being released into captivity, unsure as to whether there are any preadators in the CGI woods waiting for us. And I for one know I can deal with that much.

  • May 9, 2002, 12:11 p.m. CST

    No Rest For The Wacked OR...Spoiler-Free My Ass!

    by jollydwarf

    This movie is barely going to happen for so many of you. It&#39;s going from fretting over REVIEWS (that, as someone else stated, have been predominantly good, with only a smattering of downright bad ones to speak of)to predicting the content and quality of Episode III. Well, I can&#39;t do much about the second part of that equation, but I can make this point: Why do we take mediocre and poor reviews of these movies so hard, when WE ALMOST WELCOME CONTROVERSY FOR THE "FIGHT CLUBS", "A.I.S" AND "BLADE 2S" of the world. I mean, after seeing "Fight Club", I was glad I got it, and I thought that it said a lot about the people who didn&#39;t get it. Critics, at least. When I saw rottentomatoes.com having a 32% approval for "Blade 2", you know I went from salivating to frothing at the mouth. You&#39;re just never going to get unanimity, even if some movies are closer than others to that. But nevertheless people want to dig through the praise and the "it&#39;s flawed but enjoyable" PREDICTABLE reviews to find the scathing bashfests. And I&#39;ll also reiterate this: DO YOU REALLY THINK THE ORIGINAL TRILOGY WOULD HAVE ESCAPED UNSCATHED IN TODAY&#39;S INTERNET-DOMINATED CLIMATE? I&#39;m not yelling there, I just want to emphasize what I consider to be a very key question. Let&#39;s face it. Lucas has (for MOST people) made two very good/classic films, one uneven one, and one that is mostly an embarassment. I think that it&#39;s safe to say that on the strength of the last act alone, this film will find it&#39;s niche right smackdab in the middle, but that&#39;s only if you allow it to happen. Which reminds me...I don&#39;t even think I&#39;m going to TRY hitting this site for a week after us simpletons get a hold of it. Enjoy, ya bastards and bastardettes.

  • May 9, 2002, 12:16 p.m. CST

    well this review has confirmed all the things i feared would occ

    by I Won't See AotC

    i bet it looks real pretty but i won&#39;t give it my money, especially on opening weekend. i&#39;d rather wait &#39;till i can see it for free and fast-forward through all the crap. it&#39;s too bad, really. it&#39;s not like i was hoping these films would be so terrible. but i resent putting down money for tfm and i&#39;m not going to reward them with my money for putting out another dud that&#39;s all style and no substance.

  • May 9, 2002, 12:17 p.m. CST

    i hope you all realize that every ticket sold is another conferm

    by I Won't See AotC

    it&#39;s all a matter of taste

  • May 9, 2002, 12:18 p.m. CST

    i only wish that you mouth-breathers weren&#39;t the majority. t

    by I Won't See AotC

  • May 9, 2002, 12:21 p.m. CST

    Spiderman vs. Star Wars

    by Intoxictd

    I needed to state somthing else to. Spiderman is a great movie. Saw it, loved it, but not for one second does it compare to Star Wars. I keep seeing fans stating Spiderman rules, Star Wars sucks, Spiderman is better than Star Wars, SPIDERMAN HAS A BETTER STORY THAN STAR WARS. What?!!! Let&#39;s take a look at the two movie&#39;s stories. 25 years ago, George Lucas brought to life a story completely from his imagination. He created characters we loved and hated, and made a series of movies that went down in history as some of the greatest. Spiderman is a movie with a story that has been written again, and again, and again, and again....before and after it. It was based on a comic book. Hmmmm....a regular person gains special "superpowers", wants to hide it from everyone and fight crime, and eventually has to face up to an arch nemesis that also has extroardinary powers. Gee, never heard of that storyline before. Can we say basically every comic book created by Marvel or DC Comics? Let&#39;s all give some credit to Lucas for creating something unique. Something other writers and film makers try to copy, yet fail. Anyway...just needed to get that out of my system.

  • May 9, 2002, 12:32 p.m. CST

    Hit the Nail on the Head

    by Blabbermouse

    Victoria she did, as Yodel (the snack-food Jedi) might say. I&#39;ll go see the piece of shite, take my 9-year old (Mister Never-Stops-Fantasizing-About-Having-A-Real-Light-Saber-Even-After-Smashing-The-Ceiling-Light-Fixture-With-His-Plastic-Baseball-Bat) to see it, I&#39;ll take in the eye candy while holding my fingers in my brain to block out all the stupidity Ms. V enumerates. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ INTERESTING CO-INKYDINK: Christopher Lee plays a renegade goodguy turned villain in BOTH LOTR and AOTC - whoda thunk it? ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ LINK TO A *VERY* INTERESTING REVIEW IN SALON.COM FOLLOWING UP ON SOME OF MS.V&#39;s POINTS ABOUT LUCAS&#39; LACK OF UNDERSTANDING/STORYTELLING ABILITY IN REGARD TO HUMAN RELATIONSHIPS (Hint: sex is hard, cloning is easy): http://www.salon.com/sex/turn_on/2002/05/09/lucas/index.html

  • Yeah right. None of you Naysayers of Doom can go spoiler-free if your lives depended on it. It still sounds like King George has some tricks up his sleeves. LONG LIVE THE JEDI.

  • May 9, 2002, 12:42 p.m. CST

    I never thought it would come to this

    by Kurt S. E.

    I can&#39;t believe you guys are trying to cope with the mediocrity of the prequels by saying the original trilogy wasn&#39;t really all that great. You haven&#39;t even seen the new movie and already you are saying, "You know, if you go back and watch the original movies, you will see that they weren&#39;t very good either...." What a load of crap. If the originals were really so tepid, then we wouldn&#39;t even care about the latest installment pulled straight out of Lucas&#39;s ass! The first three, including Jedi, captured something that very, very few films have since then. I&#39;m not even going to try to put it into words. The truth is, it doesn&#39;t matter how bad these 3 prequels are. The originals were so strong that just placing a crappy film (Phantom Menace) in the Star Wars universe automatically makes it a better movie. I think this one will be fun. If it&#39;s at least as good as Starship Troopers, then I&#39;ll be thrilled. Don&#39;t get me wrong. Starship Troopers was a mediocre film, but if it had taken place in the Star Wars universe? Well then, it would have been magical. I think that is what Miss Dupont is getting at. By the way, 3 years ago she summed up my feelings about Episode I better than anyone else. I think I&#39;ll trust her this time out as well.

  • Anyone around here actually *seen* the sacred cow known as "A New Hope" recently? (raises hand). I have, I have! Call on me! OK--while it&#39;s still a good flick, it&#39;s got clunky dialogue aplenty, cheesy plot contrivances for days, and a fair share of lukewarm acting. Folks, the Star Wars saga ain&#39;t perfect, never has been, never will be. Fanboys are once again responsible for letting themselves down. Instead of viewing these films as sacrosanct, if you&#39;d just relax and enjoy, you&#39;d probably have a lot more fun with it. That&#39;s what I&#39;m going to do, but, hey, it&#39;s your Cheeto-eating, non-exercising, cathode-ray-saturated, darkened-room-living life. Do with it what you will.

  • May 9, 2002, 1:15 p.m. CST

    Ringbearer

    by Darth Melkor

    I&#39;m not saying I disagree with her review or that her&#39;s is wrong. I haven&#39;t seen the film and I think everyone has a right to their opinion and respect hers. My point is that it seems people only look at the bad reviews and ignore the good ones. Like a movie will receive 10 positive ones and everyone is all happy, then that inevitable negative one comes out and everyone freaks out hollering that the movie sucks as if this one opinion matters more than the 10 others that differed from it. Like those 10 good ones are just wiped away. It&#39;s just the way world works. Everyone focuses on the negative. Look at celebrities. A star will do a lot of good and give money to charities and dedicate their time to improving the world, but you know what? No one notices. They do one stupid little thing wrong and it&#39;s front page news and ET&#39;s top story. It&#39;s just irritating and a shame.

  • May 9, 2002, 1:50 p.m. CST

    The Problem Is That So Few People Really Understand STAR WARS...

    by Buzz Maverik

    ...they&#39;ve seen it, memorized it, they love it, they worship it, but they don&#39;t have a clue. They can pay lip service to the truth, but they can&#39;t comprehend it. George used to understand his own creation very clearly, and sometimes he still does (i.e. the titles like TPM & AOTC) but some times he doesn&#39;t. STAR WARS is space opera. STAR WARS is pulp fiction. STAR WARS is cliffhanger serials. Right now, the Worshipers are having coronaries reading this, but to me this is is one of the greatest compliments I can give a series of movies. STAR WARS is part of a wonderful tradition, and it&#39;s not classic myths and Joseph Campbell and all the intellectualism in the world (when I hear that shit, I say, "George, shut off your targeting system and TRUST YOUR FEELINGS!"). If you love STAR WARS, I highly recommend that you read Edgar Rice Burroughs MARTIAN TALES starring John Carter, Warlord of Mars. George has, I guarentee (a PADWAR is the guardian of a JED or JEDDAK). I have in my hand THE GODS OF MARS. It has chapters with titles like THE CHAMBER OF MYSTERY and THE BLACK PIRATES OF BARSOOM. Does the rhythm of those titles sound familar? So don&#39;t freak out about STAR WARS, kids. Enjoy it.

  • May 9, 2002, 1:51 p.m. CST

    digital cameras

    by audiris

    &#39;Clones&#39; digital cinematography is indistinguishable from movies shot on film, if not better-looking&#39; really? that is not what i&#39;ve seen, not what any cameraman will tell you. in fact digital cameras are inferior to film. just check out this link and see for yourselves: http://www.film-and-video.com/35mmfilmverses24pvideoshootout.html

  • May 9, 2002, 1:51 p.m. CST

    Yeah, Intoxictd. . .

    by andrecrabtree111

    George "made up" the whole story. He NEVER, EVER, EVER would have borrowed anything from, oh, I don&#39;t know, other cultures&#39; mythologies. Yep, George&#39;s was the VERY FIRST story about the underdog, ragtag rebels fighting the evil powers-that-be. . . . .Please tell me that you aren&#39;t as dense or naive as your post suggests you are.

  • May 9, 2002, 1:51 p.m. CST

    There is but one Date, December 18th 2002 -LOTR TTT

    by MinasTirith

    Argh, why do I care about AOTC and it being for kids, again. Why? I don&#39;t know really, but eye candy is all we get, again. Horrible acting, this is not want I. Do what is right GL, give this to PJ and let him have a go with a script. What do you have to lose certainly nothing more then making a good movie. A good movie this may be, but a great movie this is not. http://www.petitiononline.com/dgkomxpq/petition.html

  • May 9, 2002, 1:57 p.m. CST

    what is wrong with you poeple.

    by Rate My Poo

    Huuuuh?!?!?!?!? Drooling about some chick who, because she&#39;s female and posts on AICN, must be hot. HA!!!!!! In reality she&#39;s probably got a mustash and is so fat that when she wears a Malcom X t-shirt, helicopters land on her. What tha hell?!?!?!?

  • May 9, 2002, 2:04 p.m. CST

    Better then TPM????

    by MinasTirith

    How is that saying anything?? TPM is unwatchable, just can&#39;t bear it any longer. Wait till 6 months from now when this movie will be treated like it should be, as trash. Thank God lucas is not going to do 7,8 and 9. Thanks god for that. Time for this series to re-tire.

  • May 9, 2002, 2:17 p.m. CST

    Darth BALLS

    by Mr.Shufflebotham

    I think it would be cool if Jay and Quiet Bill had cameos like they did in that one film of theirs. IT was like a parody of Star Wars and boy was it funny. I am looking forward to Episode 2 Star Wars Clones. It looks neat. But remember when Jay goes "Darth BALLS" and jumps out and cuts Mark Hammond&#39;s foot off. THat cracked me up.

  • May 9, 2002, 2:23 p.m. CST

    Great Review of Episode 1-so good I passed on reading the Episod

    by Tarl_Cabot

    The "Menace" review was superbly well written and dead on. You also nailed a couple flaws I never heard addressed: The cinematography in Tunisia (that which was shot in the real world) at times looked like a TV production and lacked the flavor of E4&#39;s Tatoonie scenery. The mid-chlorians/Dart Vader issue was a great point too. With reduced expectations and no Jake Loyd/Jar jar/Gungans, I think AOTC will be much better than TPM (by default) and make for some great entertainment.I didn&#39;t have high expectations for Spiderman and it was, for me, fantastic. This movie is review proof anyway-fuck it! Bring on the Clones!

  • May 9, 2002, 2:23 p.m. CST

    Guess I missed something but...

    by the_pissboy1

    The first 3 star wars films were neither original nor deep. They were simplistic good v. evil space operas. To assign some sort of mental depth to them is an insult to films that actually require people pay attention. One reviewer actually had the never to mention that lucas is playing to the groundlings...hello, his whole career is based on playing to people with simple cravings...good guy in white, bad guy in black, scoundrel with a heart of gold, old wise sage, princess kept in the castle, dastardly plans for dominating the people, noble rebels fightinf tyranny. It&#39;s all fucking basic! Get a clue, Lucas makes popcorn flicks like spielberg, not intellectual films.

  • May 9, 2002, 2:27 p.m. CST

    that just speaks for aicn....objectivity! no fun

    by drjones

  • May 9, 2002, 2:28 p.m. CST

    IM NOT GOING IM NOT GOING!!!!!!!!!!!

    by Stimpson J Cat

  • May 9, 2002, 2:30 p.m. CST

    Hahaha, the last thing I care is a girlie&#39;s opinion about a

    by Burp Fartman

  • May 9, 2002, 2:30 p.m. CST

    Intxicated, I Like Your Posts. They Are Reasonable & Intelligent

    by Buzz Maverik

    And that doesn&#39;t make it bad! In fact, one of Lucas&#39; great talents is to take things that are part of our pop culture and fashion a great story that has changed filmmaking (often for the worse, but that&#39;s another topic). STAR WARS is elements of DUNE, THE CHRONICLES OF NARNIA, THE WIZARD OF OZ (complete with the Tin Man and the Cowardly Lion), FLASH GORDON, BUCK ROGERS, ROY ROGERS, COMMANDO CODY, JOHN CARTER WARLORD OF MARS, the stories of E.E. "Doc" Smith and a million other space operas, westerns, cartoons and comic books. It&#39;s the cinema of Akira Kurosawa, John Ford and Howard Hughes (see THE HIDDEN FORTRESS, THE SEARCHERS where Luke&#39;s return to the farm house and his discovery of the charred bodies was lifted, and HELLS ANGELS). I guess it&#39;s myth and legend and Joseph Campbell (although I never heard anything from Lucas in an interview about Joseph Campbell until George "The Road Warrior" Miller started talking about him). That&#39;s why STAR WARS is so huge. It&#39;s everything we love. And that&#39;s why so many people react so strongly either way about it (except for the stupid ones who are negative because it&#39;s fun to be negative) pro and con. Lucas nails so many things in our collective unconscious that his fans virtually worship him. And when he screws up, people lavish hatred because he screwed up something in their psyche that is very dear to them. I&#39;m gonna go see AOTC but I&#39;m gonna wait a few days because these days going on the first day is just kind of embarrassing.

  • May 9, 2002, 2:37 p.m. CST

    Oh, Yeah, STAR WARS Is Also Heavy On Elements From...

    by Buzz Maverik

    LORD OF THE RINGS. That&#39;ll really make the kids crap their pants, but it&#39;s true. I hesitated to say that because it&#39;ll bring out the guy who says that Lucas and Tolkien both went to the same source material THE ENCHANTMENT OF SUPERSILIOUS by Salieri, or something like that, but it&#39;s true. Lucas is a child of the &#39;60s, and LOTR had a big hippie following, so you know he read it, as well as a lot of other things. Every storyteller does it, in one form or another. It&#39;s a good thing, not a bad thing.

  • May 9, 2002, 2:50 p.m. CST

    Come On, the 1st 3 were good, but....

    by RealityKing

    I love Star Wars. I always have, and always will. I am, however, grounded in Reality that Star Wars was not the greatest movie of all time. It is not Gone With The Wind, Citizen Kane, etc. It is a throw back to the old serials before the main movie. It was made as a popcorn movie. Lucas never said he was going to create a masterpiece. Look at the actor he hired. They were nobodies, except for Alec. Harrison Ford became a star, but for his action roles. All his serious stuff flopped. Mark and Carrie never did anything more. And Luke was always such a winer in the origional trilogy. The people who claim to be Star Wars fans better think back to the original series for what it was, and stop trying to make it more than it was. AOTC will be Star Wars, and 20 years from now, you&#39;ll be talking about how brillant it was.

  • The rumor is that in the scene where N&#39;Sync was originally set to have a cameo as Jedi, after Lucas digitally erased them, they were replaced with other actors playing Jedi Knights. Among the rumored stars making cameo appearances in Star Wars are Peter North, Ron Jeremy and Michael J. Cox. Also, in a CGI breakthrough, the first human character created 100% from CGI will appear in the film. The "human Jar Jar Binks" likeness will be based on former veteran actor John Holmes, who George Lucas wanted in the film but could not make it to the shoot due to other circumstances.

  • May 9, 2002, 3:07 p.m. CST

    Star Wars is allways over analyzed...

    by skycrapper

    Is everyone forgetting that the original trilogy had hoaky dialog and bad acting. BUT WE LOVED THEM ANYWAYS! It&#39;s Star Wars, get over yourselves! I&#39;ve seen this movie and it kicks ass. Except for some C-3PO parts.

  • May 9, 2002, 3:13 p.m. CST

    Looks like Alina DeVries needs a nap...

    by CoolDan989

    ...and somebody to burp her too. Oh, and Guitarman...Star Wars is not over. You can climb back in the window.

  • May 9, 2002, 3:14 p.m. CST

    Anyone Realize

    by MinasTirith

    That we like the Originals when we were younger. We have all grown up!! Why can a kids movie like Iron Giant be so much better acting and scripting wise then EP I and II???? Sorry, but EP I and II need not be campy if the script was any good. It need not be juvenile if the script is any good. Why does Lucas get to treat us like idiots when there are plenty of well done kids movis that don&#39;t talk down to us. Face it, Lucas is not very good at what he does, he just got damn lucky, damn lucky. Some of you and your excuses for liking this movie are grwoing weary. Mark my words, 6 months from now, AOTC will be laughed at just like TPM was. http://www.petitiononline.com/dgkomxpq/petition.html

  • May 9, 2002, 3:15 p.m. CST

    I&#39;VE READ OVER TWENTY REVIEWS NOW AND THIS IS THE FIRST ONE

    by Lt. Torello

    Ms. Dupont admires the saga, but not to the point of being an apologist for Lucas&#39;s many shortcomings. She fairly lists the high points (for which I will still gladly shell out my admission) but she also lists the many things wrong with it (sadly confirming my fears). Don&#39;t get me wrong, I&#39;m seeing the motherfucker opening weekend. Anyone who came of age in the late 70s will. But finally, a review that gets past the hype and just tells us flat-out whether it&#39;s a good film or not.

  • The C grade bestowed upon Star Wars by Lisa Schwarzbaum is from the same reviewer who gave FIGHT CLUB a D+. It&#39;s from the same magazine that gave O BROTHER WHERE ART THOU? an F, saying (and I quote), "Unwatchable." It is from the same reviewer who gave a B+ to Britney Spears in CROSSROADS. There ain&#39;t enough Morton&#39;s on the shelf to swallow any review from EW, so don&#39;t even worry about it.

  • May 9, 2002, 3:21 p.m. CST

    In response to my posts.....

    by Intoxictd

    First off I&#39;d like to say thank you to Buzz for your compliment on my posts. It surprised me a bit. I&#39;d also like to say that I apologize for my Spiderman vs. Star Wars post. I may have typed it a bit hastily, had to go out on an errand. To the gentleman who said I was being naive, I understand after shorting the details I was trying to explain. but I&#39;m not being naive. Yes, I understand completely the similarities between Star Wars and all of those other films. And yes Lucas did borrow a lot of things from history and other cultures. I mean the Empire wiping out the Jedi sounds nothing like the Nazis trying to wipe out the Jews. My point is that Lucas brought all of these things together to create a story (not completely unique) but close enough to an original storyline. Spiderman, I have always thought was just Marvel&#39;s adaption of Superman. To me, not realizing the similarities between the two would be like saying that "Deep Impact" was nothing at all like "Armagaeddon". Star Wars was never quite parallel to anything else that I know of. The point here is that every writer of a story bases the story on something that&#39;s either happened in history, or something they loved in another story they might have read while growing up. I like Star Wars because it has always been as close to a Sci-Fi picture can be "true to life". For me to explain this would take too long, but I&#39;m sure many people would agree with me. There&#39;s a lot of morality issues in Star Wars, a responsibility with great power. Doing what&#39;s right as opposed to doing what is wrong. People can say the same thing about any other movie, really, including Spiderman. I&#39;ve always loved Spiderman, I just think that those people whom say it&#39;s a better movie than "Attack of the Clones" simply because it has a better story than Star Wars, should examine the two a bit more. Also AOTC hasn&#39;t even come out yet, so can you compare the two at all? However, to sum this up, like I said in my first post today, this is all MY OPINION. In no way, manner, or form am I saying that I am right, and everyone else who thinks opposite is wrong.

  • May 9, 2002, 3:30 p.m. CST

    R2 Suspensors - PLEASE!!!!!!!@@@@@@

    by MinasTirith

    R2 and C3-PO are able to keep up by merely rolling or walking no matter how fast the human star are running away from the bad guys. Not only that they always, always find the smoothest path to take, no matter how rocky the terrain is. So don&#39;t fuking start about why R2 and fly now and didn&#39;t before. This type of analyzing is beyond anal.

  • May 9, 2002, 3:31 p.m. CST

    Imagine that...

    by mjgaudin

    a negative review of a Sci-fi movie from a female...who&#39;d a thunk it? People who write negative reviews of movies need to consider WHO the movie was made for. Don&#39;t get me wrong, I&#39;m not purposely trying to be sexist but DAMN...get of Lucas&#39; @ss will ya? These movies are supposed to be fun, not deep, mind altering, life changing experiences full of depth, character timeing, geographical accuracy, or any of those movie terms you can pick up in theater 101 at your local Community College. You negative reviewers remember fun don&#39;t you? Like when you were a kid and it didn&#39;t matter why you were playing a particular game, all you knew was that it was fun! I liked the talkbackers comment about the other episodes being Citizen Kane...that was too funny. As far as innacuracies go(for example: R2-D2 flying, Yoda being an ass kicker, and Jedi enjoying a little battle action) you have to remember that a long period of time has passed and a universe has been torn apart by war in the time between a New Hope and Phantom Menace. Any way...if you want my opionion, all of the Star Wars episodes are like Spam or Chicken nuggets...you don&#39;t really want to know or care about what goes into them...they just taste good!

  • May 9, 2002, 3:38 p.m. CST

    Yeah whatever, deep, not deep, deep, not deep

    by MinasTirith

    I agree with the poster who suggested that Anakin&#39;s "stalking" her into loving him was really dark jedi mind clouding... Comment: ...or at least it could be. After all, how different is "these aren&#39;t the droids you&#39;re looking for" from "you must love me"? ----- That&#39;s great and all, but if Lucas can show that in the movie, then it&#39;s meanigless propaganda by SW fans claiming something more deep that isn&#39;t there. SW fans say it&#39;s not deep, SW fans say it&#39;s deep, make up your minds. If Lucas wanted that he would have made it clear in the movie, but once again Lucas is unable to make anything clear in his movies.

  • May 9, 2002, 3:52 p.m. CST

    I think a lot of you have missed the point

    by MrPeanut

    This may not be a bad film, but it will never be a great one either. We need to stop taking all these blockbusters so seriously. LOTR, Spider-Man, Star Wars, they are all fun, and I have no problem with people getting exited about them, but making these movies part of your lifestyle is just a litle too much. They&#39;re fun, but not profound. Quit expecting brilliant cinema and just enjoy the movie, then get on with your life!

  • May 9, 2002, 4 p.m. CST

    MorGoth, ah No.

    by MinasTirith

    SW is a baseless beyond kids movie with nothing to offer to society then a couple hours of forgetfullness which I can get easily enough by doing any number of illegal things. SW is a lost cause, please GL let it go, your ego is in the way and your movies are failures to this generation of kids who will soon foget all about EP 1, 2, 3. Funny, I don&#39;t find many kids who thought EP1 was better then LOTR. Same will be said with EP II and TTT. EP 1 and II and III will not have the lasting appeal of the OT. Lucas, give it up, please, for the sake of your original 3 films, which he is editing every chance he can get anyway. Sigh, so much potential, so much wasted.

  • May 9, 2002, 4:45 p.m. CST

    RottenTomatoes

    by MinasTirith

    EPII sitting right now with a 62% Approval Rating. LOTR ended with a 96% approval rating. Yeah, I know, SW is for kids. My ass!! Toy Story was for kids too, but it had a decent script and better CG acting then the real actors in EPII. http://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/StarWarsEpisodeIIAttackoftheClones-1112314/

  • May 9, 2002, 4:55 p.m. CST

    Chrissly: Fantastic!

    by Otto Parts

    I&#39;ve been wishing someone would print something like that for a while. Maybe some people will now shut the fuck up. The part about Fisher being dull and wooden was particularly poignant when you think about what they&#39;ve said with regard to Portman

  • May 9, 2002, 4:56 p.m. CST

    Approval Rating...

    by Intoxictd

    The 62% is based off of only 8 reviews. I&#39;ve read atleast 20. About 75-80% were good or mixed. This still goes back to my point that someone with the title "Movie Critic" is going to tell me, or you, or anybody else, what your going to like. I have my own likes and dislikes and will form my own opinion. Also, for the record, LOTR was an excellent movie. I do not think your constant praising of how much better it is than Star Wars is warrented. Every one has a movie they&#39;re passionate about. Comparing your favorite to others is not necessary. You like what you like, and we&#39;ll like what we like. I guess what I&#39;m trying to say is, if you don&#39;t have anything positive to say, DON&#39;T POST! Your childish whining about LOTR and Peter Jackson being better than Lucas or Star Wars sounds like an 8 year old saying to a friend "My daddy can beat up your daddy!!!" Grow up a little bit.

  • May 9, 2002, 5:02 p.m. CST

    Oh Dear Lord, STAR WARS Is So Not Dead

    by NoCureForFools

    i&#39;m not saying that Alexandria is wrong, but she obviously picked through the thing with a fine tooth comb... obviously she went into the film already prepared to hate it (you know, to prove how cynical and aloof one can be). turns out that although she didn&#39;t hate it, she didn&#39;t like it. which is fine. the thing is, and what i have a hard time understanding is: when was Star Wars not completely cheesy? when did it not have bad, stilted dialouge and acting? when was it not riddled with plot holes? when was the romance anything but threadbare and slapped together? when was it not a glorified pulpy monster movie? can you explain these points to me? of course, nothing is going to touch the original films. plainly because the core issue of the original series -- the dysfucntional family in space -- can&#39;t have the same weight now. when Darth Vader revealed to Luke that he was his father, it completely blew my 8 year old mind. seriously! i lost it! i loved it, but it completely freaked me out. this time around there isn&#39;t going to be this grand revelation, and even if there was, i don&#39;t think it would make any reasonably sane 30 year old stumble out of the film in an emotionally confused daze. basically, it amounts to watching a fake history. but a really cool (in a geeky way) history with lots of explosions! battles! lightsabres! a pretty princess! what else do you want? this is by the books genre stuff, not some post-modern deconstruction of the film form. although i&#39;m dying to see this next installment, i can also admit that the whole prequal thing is nearly completely pointless. i also don&#39;t think that Lucas has what it takes to really plumb the depths of what makes one turn to evil. BUT, just the whisper of it is enough for me. i can fill in my own blanks. especially considering that as cool as Star Wars is or can be, at heart it&#39;s a movie for kids. and a final note: every single other review i have read is singing it&#39;s praises. last time out everyone hated TPM. from what i have read and what i know, i expect to like it. i&#39;m sort of over hoping that a children&#39;s film is gonna change my life. but i can get a kick out of it.

  • May 9, 2002, 5:03 p.m. CST

    I will give Darth Lucas no more of my money.

    by Thavertop

    As far as I&#39;m concerned, there are only three Star Wars movies. I may see AOTC when one of my frends buys the DVD and lets me borrow it. From now on I will make sure none of my money makes its way into Darth Lucas pockets.

  • May 9, 2002, 5:12 p.m. CST

    You Know What?

    by Eos

    ...it probably IS going to be a cheesy B-movie. And you know what else? I&#39;m going to be there on opening night (or morning, rather) with all the other hopeless geeks. I&#39;m going to buy a big tub of extra-salty movie popcorn, find a good seat, settle back...and have fun. And I think I&#39;m going to have a much better time next week than either you doomsayers who will go in there salivating at the thought of picking out mistakes OR you fanboys who will go in there expecting to critique it as if it was a Leonardo da Vinci painting. I&#39;m just going to go in there and have fun, and I advise you to do the same.

  • May 9, 2002, 5:18 p.m. CST

    what Pearl Harbor Review?

    by vbz77

    I searched this site for DuPont&#39;s name, and DVD Journal too - haven&#39;t found it. So is this just a rumor?

  • May 9, 2002, 5:37 p.m. CST

    Sure, MinasTirith...

    by Leto III

    Uhhhmmmnn, yeah, MinasTirith. You&#39;re saying AOTC is utter fecking gobshite, *when you haven&#39;t even bloody seen it yet??* Chalk up another victory for the straw-man troll camp...

  • May 9, 2002, 5:41 p.m. CST

    At last, a review devoid of overly gushy sentimentality

    by Rhavokk

    Thanks, Alex. By the way, if you look anything like that illustration, I must have you.

  • May 9, 2002, 5:44 p.m. CST

    let me say it again...

    by minderbinder

    If it&#39;s positive "It&#39;s a plant!" If it&#39;s negative "These naysayers are determined to hate this" If they give details of what they didn&#39;t like "Why so nitpicky" If they just give an impression "Too vague" Poorly written "You&#39;re an idiot" Well written "Trying to hard to sound legitimate" "You went in expecting a bad movie" "You went in with unreachably high expectations" "Your inner child must be dead" "These movies are supposed to have bad acting/dialogue" "Leave your brain at the door" (so this rule means you should love Battlefield Earth as well?) "You&#39;re afraid of this movie threatening your favorite movie" "This movie was made for the fans...you&#39;re not a real fan" "You liked movie XYZ so you&#39;re an idiot" You people will obviously concoct ANY excuse to dismiss reviews you don&#39;t agree with (and at this point 99% of you have NOT seen the movie, so how the hell can you disagree with ANY review a week before the movie is released?). So why even bother? Just go see the movie. Or don&#39;t. Personally, I thought the review was interesting...I hope I don&#39;t agree but we&#39;ll see.

  • May 9, 2002, 5:53 p.m. CST

    Never mind, found the Pearl Harbor review :(

    by vbz77

    But then again, she merely liked it, not waxed poetic about it. If she liked Armageddon, though, I&#39;ll start to have serious second thoughts about her taste...

  • That&#39;s all that I ask.

  • May 9, 2002, 6:07 p.m. CST

    Not That Anyone Cares OR...Where&#39;s The Advil?

    by jollydwarf

    Hey, product placement in Talkbacks! Look into it! Anyways, I&#39;m done with this site and posting until probably a week after I see the film. Why bother? This is getting fucking-A ridiculous. Plus, every other post is going to be a review that goes on for ten seconds of non-stop scrolling. "My AOTC Review-The Good and The Bad and The Cure for Insomnia." "AOTC-Second Impressions as a Prelude to my Third Impressions". "Why George Lucas Is The Force Beneath My Wings." Look, no one is going to really read your review. I realize that these talkbacks are a forum and I&#39;m all for freedom of expression. But no matter how the movie ends up, this is going to get U-G-L-Y. Like it isn&#39;t already. I figure by avoiding this site for a couple weeks, I should be able to recalibrate a little, too. Oh, and those of you who expect to stay truly spoiler-free? Then you might want to have someone put up an impenetrable firewall so you can&#39;t even go here. There&#39;s spoiler snipers in these parts, and they&#39;ve got their sites on you. Or haven&#39;t you learned? At least try to enjoy the film and read you in a couple weeks. P.S. Save some money for the SuperBeet(lejuice) Action Figure! Later.

  • May 9, 2002, 6:20 p.m. CST

    Mindbinder -- Well said!

    by Kikstad

    Trust no one&#39;s opinions except your one. Don&#39;t let ANY critic be your gatekeeper. Go see the movies you like, and JUDGE FOR YOURSELVES! Long live the Jedi.

  • May 9, 2002, 6:39 p.m. CST

    Hypocrisy RULZ, man

    by BrashHulk

    I always get a great laugh out of people like "professional" reviewers, who get to see every movie FREE OF CHARGE, say something like, "Let&#39;s boycott this movie to teach the filmmakers a lesson!" Talk about your hypocritical asses.

  • Lisa Schwarzbaum&#39;s review of "the Matrix" was a perfect example of why I generally take a female&#39;s opinion of a sci-fi/fantasy movie with a grain of salt. She actually said that the only reason she marginally enjoyed "The Matrix" was because of Keanu&#39;s "hunkiness." Pathetic. If I&#39;m reading a review of "In The Bedroom," then I&#39;ll pay attention to DuPont or Schwarzbaum, but when it comes to "Spider-Man", "X-Men", "Lord Of The Rings", or "Star Wars", give me a non-female or non-gay male (are you listening, Roeper?) reviewer.

  • May 9, 2002, 7:15 p.m. CST

    I&#39;ve read all these posts on here and....

    by IAmLegolas

    ...it&#39;s just amazing to me how the feelings on these TBs in general, towards Episode II, fluctuated back and forth on here from the second Episode 1 hit the theatres until today. I&#39;m starting to think some of you really are mindless sheep who are slaves to hype and to the cult of Lucas and it&#39;s not just a witty remark continuously spewed. I know it&#39;s hard to break away from the "everything Stars Wars is and will always be God" mentality, believe me, I was that way from the second I saw Star Wars in the theaters back when it was called just Star Wars up until a couple of months after Ep.1 hit the theaters. I remember watching Ep. 1 opening night with a bunch of friends and one of them walked out scathingly p*ssed off. I wondered why and asked him what was wrong and he just said "That&#39;s not Star Wars, it was awful.". I didn&#39;t really understand, I thought it was good, but not as great as the Original 3, but over time and some more rewatching, my rose colored glasses.... colored from the fact that it was STAR WARS and it was a long frickin&#39; time since we got a new one to watch..... came off and I saw Ep. 1 for the sh*tty movie that it was. This coupled with rewatching the original 3 with Lucas&#39;s digital reworkings (half of it improved the movies, half of it f*cked them up) and his song and dance with releasing them on DVD soured me on Lucas and his universe big time. My love for Star Wars seriously was damaged. Anyway, these boards were all f*ck Lucas, f*ck Star Wars etc. etc., but as the years until Ep. 2 hits the theaters started to become months and then weeks and now days people seem to be piling back on Lucas&#39;s money machine, begging to be fed more B.S. I&#39;m hearing new reasons to see it now after critically mixed reviews.... I&#39;m supposed to "lighten up" and "have fun".... defending this movie now with "it&#39;s just a popcorn flick" and "leave your brain at the door" and "just have fun with it." well f*ck that, that&#39;s not good enough for me anymore and I don&#39;t believe that it&#39;s good enough for a movie with the holy Star Wars stamp on it. I don&#39;t like watching movies like Mummy Returns or Tomb Raider, sorry if I like a little substance in my movies now. Maybe it is because I&#39;m older, I mean I don&#39;t like watching Van Damme and Seagal movies like anymore like I did as a kid. It&#39;s true the Original 3 were silly sometimes and goofy and hokey but they still were COOL and still had great scenes and great dialogue that people continuously repeat in our culture, and I just don&#39;t mean visually. Epic stuff like Vader telling Luke that he was his Father and Han deciding to come back to help Luke and the rebellion instead of going back to his greedy, selfish ways.... Lando betraying Han and then later on helping him out because he made a mistake and his hands were tied at the time. Am I really just a bitter old jaded fan? Was it because I was a little kid back then and I&#39;m not one now? I don&#39;t think so. The original 3 still are great to me even now. I don&#39;t cringe when I watch them (except for the Ewok stuff... and of course Greedo firing first.... well maybe the CGI Jabba too). They just got better with time and have massive rewatchablitly. Episode 1 came along and watching it just gets worse over time and I can&#39;t bring myself to watch it. Star Wars is no longer family friendly, it&#39;s been dumbed down for kids and I think that is just plain wrong. How can Lucas make 6 films over a period of 20+ years and keep it at a kiddie level? How are the kids from the 80&#39;s who are now grown up supposed to handle and enjoy the rest of Lucas&#39;s Universe if it&#39;s not aimed for them anymore? The prequels don&#39;t have to be "dark" and "adult", but they don&#39;t have to be all Barney&#39;d out either. As for the hokey story and acting, true that the originals had that but after 20+ years and a legion of talented people at Lucas&#39;s disposal and hopefully Lucas became more skilled at what he does he should of improved on his saga and tried to outdo the originals with not only improved effects, but improved acting and storytelling. I guess his ego did get in the way. How&#39;s this for some mythology, Lucas? "Absolute power corrupts absolutely". Will I see Ep.2 ? Yes. When? Not right away, I like the boycott it for a week theory. Can one person make a difference? Well shall see. Why do I still want to see this movie? Because believe it or not I am or was a Star Wars fan est. 1977. I&#39;ve seen the other 4, I might as well watch the last 2 at least once. I&#39;m putting these prequels on a level with the other summer blockbusters that the Star Wars Universe once pioneered the way for. BTW: Notice how I didn&#39;t bring up LOTR (or Spider-Man). Just because my nick is IAmLegolas (a nick I came up with in 1998-99 combining two literary references.... Richard Matheson&#39;s I AM LEGEND and one of my favorite Tolkien characters) doesn&#39;t mean I&#39;m some LOTR movie newbie that just sprang up to bash Star Wars. All incoherent parts to this rant are sponsored by me typing this at work! Peace out, yo!

  • May 9, 2002, 7:35 p.m. CST

    latent jock behavior

    by Aquafresh

    I see all this franchise favoritism as being akin to rooting for your favorite sports team. In my own admittidley silly way, I am hoping Spidey beats AOTC in box office receipts, just &#39;cause SW has always been the big kid on the playground. This in no way reflects upon the quality of either movie, & those who take this sort of lunacy to heart really need to gain some perspective on life. But i think most of us realize that. Either way, its gonna be one hell of a summer.

  • May 9, 2002, 8:25 p.m. CST

    Why I am not seeing "Star Wars: Episode II - Attack of the Clone

    by Chow Yun-Fat II

    George Lucas should have let another director take the director&#39;s chair for his second and third installment of the Star Wars legacy. To be honest, Lucas is not a good director and he is not an actor&#39;s director, he is a computer&#39;s director. I loved the original Star Wars trilogy because it brought a sense of mystery along with it. Lucas ruined the maturity a bit with "Return of the Jedi" but crushed it with "The Phantom Menace. Lucas is just giving what Star Wars fans actually want, not the general audience as a whole. Some fans were disappointed that Episode I was kid-friendly so Lucas made Episode II darker. So to be honest my friends, Star Wars is officially dead. "The Lord of the Rings" trilogy is the new "Star Wars" of the twenty-first century.

  • May 9, 2002, 9 p.m. CST

    Here we go again.

    by The Chucker

    These talkbacks keep getting more interesting, don&#39;t they?

  • May 9, 2002, 9:06 p.m. CST

    Well, I remember some said Empire wasn&#39;t as fun.

    by Drath

    I don&#39;t mean to be the much loathed Lucas apologist, you&#39;re free to hate or love the movie as you choose, but I think I&#39;m sick of reading about AOTC. I need to see the movie. No more internet reviews, no more reading what OTHER people hated or loved about it. I need this to be my movie, my experience, not this horrible second hand crap. If there&#39;d been an internet in &#39;80, even Empire would have had naysayers. I admit, comparing this to empire is unfair, mainly because that movie is not a two hour experience. It&#39;s got twenty-two years of history and nostalgia built into it. That and it was just damn good. But I&#39;ve just gotta see this one. I really like Spider-Man despite the negative reviews it garnered. In the end, it&#39;s not about what other people think. Well, not ALL about that anyway.

  • May 9, 2002, 9:16 p.m. CST

    She&#39;s right... I *really* *seriously* don&#39;t care....

    by Smugbug

    don&#39;t care to see it right away. Oh, I&#39;ll see it. But I&#39;ll wait a couple of weeks. I have to go see Spider-Man a second time before I see this. Sorry, Lucas - won&#39;t be able to add my $8.50 to your bankroll right away.

  • May 9, 2002, 9:35 p.m. CST

    by Damer1

    (4) The opening shot is a return to form after Menace&#39;s boring fly-by. (For my money, Star Wars opening shots need to be vast.) And after the title crawl, the camera pans up instead of down to the busy planetscape

  • May 9, 2002, 10 p.m. CST

    Why? Why was I programmed to feel pain?!!

    by Knightwing2040

    Why did they have to bring the droids into the new trilogy?!! Why can&#39;t Lucas retire again and let a better person write and direct Star Wars? I swear every time I hear I hear Ani going "Yipee!" I want to shoot myself in the leg.

  • May 9, 2002, 10:04 p.m. CST

    Ummm, maybe Yoda is "flummoxed" by the pillar b/c he just used e

    by Atticus Finch

    And why in the hell is a lesbian going to see SW, anyhow? ("dripping" with sarcasm...that was great!)

  • May 9, 2002, 10:44 p.m. CST

    thanky for another wonderful review Ms. DuPont

    by kojiro

    That&#39;s all.

  • May 9, 2002, 10:47 p.m. CST

    Reading TBs is like listening to my parents fight...

    by Osgood Sigerson

    ...Everyone has a valid point, everyone thinks they&#39;re right, and everyone refuses to even consider opposing views. I&#39;ve just realized that we all care WAY too much about a MOVIE. That being said, here&#39;s my take: I think George has forgotten aspects of the series that have made it successful in the past. Specifically, the Jedi. Based on the original trilogy and Ep. 1, the Jedi were these serious, no-nonsense guys who made sure the galaxy didn&#39;t get out of hand. According to everything we&#39;ve seen so far about Ep. 2, the Jedi are now the Space Police in a buddy cop movie. Aside from the visuals, Christopher Lee, Natalie Portman&#39;s bare midriff, and the political aspect of the story(personally, I&#39;d like to see a movie just about Palpatine and his whole political intrigue thing, he rawks), it looks phoned in. But I haven&#39;t seen the movie yet. Maybe I&#39;m wrong. I hope I&#39;m wrong. Is Mace Windu right? Is this party over? We shall see.

  • May 9, 2002, 11:03 p.m. CST

    SEE YODA FIGHT RIGHT NOW!!!!!!!

    by Ralph Wiggum

    GO TO THE VIDEO SECTION AT CONSUMPTIONJUNCTION.COM.....SOMEONE VIDEO TAPED A TRAILER IN A THEATER THAT IS SHOWING YODA KICKING ASS!!!!!

  • May 9, 2002, 11:06 p.m. CST

    YODA TRAILER

    by Ralph Wiggum

    THE YODA TRAILER IS TITLED SOMETHIN LIKE BADDEST MO-FO IN THE GALAXY....TO HELP YOU FIND IT EASIER!!!

  • and alexandria can go write a review of something else...like how to have fun and not take movies so seriously.

  • May 10, 2002, 12:13 a.m. CST

    Okay, lets put everything into perspective...

    by agentcooper

    ...Star Wars is a tremendously successful series of motion pictures, more so than any other in the history of the art form. It figures that some critics are going to rip it to shreds, no matter what. Don&#39;t believe it? Go over the the Talkback under Moriarty&#39;s review and read the Vincent Camby piece that one of our fellow talkbackers posted. It is a scathing review of THE EMPIRE STRIKES BACK. Right, ESB, the most beloved of the saga. Camby calls the acting wooden, the dialogue bad, says he doesn&#39;t care about the story...Does this sound familiar? Look, critics love to try to convince the public that anything big, successful and expensive is not worth the time it will take to view it. Watch: This December, I bet there are dozens of bad reviews for The Two Towers. Not that I am in any way ripping on the LOTR Trilogy, but I bet that critics will be less inclined to give the next film a good review because it is no longer the "Underdog." Most critics are like Darth Vader: They love the power they weild, and will do what they can to feel they have used said power to the ultimate. Now, Alexandra, I think you have a very enjoyable writing style, perhaps the best on the site (Morarity gives you a run for the money) but I have to disagree with you about most things "Star Wars." I just think you take it way too seriously. I was very encouraged upon your softer review of "The Phantom Menace" DVD, but am quite disappointed by the nitpicking you exibit in this review. The films are meant to harken back to the old "Buck Rogers" serials, but also have more than a bit of Mythological influence. Oh, and they kick much ass. They are fun, pure and simple. I hope this film is all I hope it will be. I hope we can all enjoy it for what it is meant to be: a fun, cool story about characters we all love and the events that shape them into the beings they will become.

  • May 10, 2002, 12:31 a.m. CST

    Ms. Dupont is an film snob wannabe

    by Robardsinator

    not to mention a cunt. I&#39;d like to see and hear some of the winning ideas for films that all these lame-o&#39;s on this site have. seriously. I Just signed up for talkback because you people are absolutely pathetic. A bunch of pussies that keep all quiet and to themselves but on the computer they&#39;re Mr. Elite. Fuck you. Harry Knowles...you&#39;re a douche bag. Talk about exploiting a medium to become a cheap wannabe celebrity. Gene Shalit&#39;s moustache has more edge than you. As for you Moriarty, how about making your cartoon more of a fatass like you. Mortal Kombat 3..give me a break, you talentless fuck. "Oh Oh I ate a hamburger today and my friend jerked me off..oh what joy..we sat around watching LOTR while fingering our assholes..im the biggest fanboy in the world"//thats what you people sound like. Not everyonne on this site is shit. The reviewers are and 90 percent of the talkbackers are but 1 out of people has somehting logical to say. And by the way Columbia College Chicago is a brown ribbon hack school for goth fags and hipster wannabes. I wouldnt be surprised if MS. Dupont was the lesbo filmmaker wannabe. How edgy

  • May 10, 2002, 12:34 a.m. CST

    Digital Star Wars

    by RogueScribner

    Has anyone seen this film or any other projected digitally? I&#39;d like to know the differences between the two mediums. AOTC will be shown locally in a digital theater and I&#39;m thinking of going there to see it. Thanks. L8r

  • May 10, 2002, 12:42 a.m. CST

    Darth Homercles

    by RogueScribner

    No one is buying your "review". Go troll somewhere else. Leave the boards for people who wish to have an intelligent conversation. Bye bye!

  • May 10, 2002, 12:50 a.m. CST

    Awww that&#39;s harsh

    by SilentType

    I haven&#39;t seen it yet........but dammit if this doesn&#39;t make me even more anxious to experience for myself. I&#39;m tired of avoiding spoilers, and reading other people&#39;s reviews (The NY Times were very critical). I just want to sit in a seat, watch that glowing green Lucasfilm logo appear and join in with the other fanboys as we all cheer and then settle back for the experience we have all waited for. Ah, it seems only yesterday that we were &#39;talk-backing&#39; about TPM, and now here we are........three years later....blah blah blah. I&#39;m bored at work, and thinking out loud. I want to see thie film......role on Wednesday night!

  • May 10, 2002, 1:11 a.m. CST

    agentcooper is right frigging on.

    by Noriko Takaya

    And some of you people *cough*Ryalto*cough* need a trip to a psychiatric ward as you have serious emotional problems. It&#39;s just a *move,* people. Lighten the hell up. Yeah, TMP had bad acting, autopilot directing from Lucas and @#&*!%($!ing Jar-Jar, but the Flanneled One was IMOHO was just rusty after a 15-year layoff from directing (hey--YOU leave your job for a decade-plus and then come back to it and see how well YOU do! It&#39;s a wonder the man could even operate the phone system). Most of the reviews I&#39;ve read thus far say that in a lot of the areas listed above there is a marked improvement over the last outing. Yes, yes, many also say that the acting in some places is still a bit wooden and the dialog suffers a little. Whoopee. The same exact things could be said about my all-time fave of the STAR WARS flicks, THE EMPIRE STRIKES BACK. And that was a GREAT film. So while I&#39;d BETTER see the improvement everyone is talking about when I catch this thing next week, I am still going into this movie with an open mind. Oh, and lastly, Ms. DuPont: you and Moriarty are by far two of the best writers on this site, bar none. Please ignore the zit-faced I.Q.-9 mental midgets in here who flame you. They just don&#39;t like those yucky icky cootie-encrusted girls playing with their Star Wars action figures is all. Toppu o Nerae!

  • May 10, 2002, 1:12 a.m. CST

    I have a cool idea...

    by PurityOfEssence

    What if I created multiple talk back accounts and then argued with myself about all the pressing issues of the day. My first account could rave about the greatness of Peter Jackson, and rip on George Lucas. Then My second account could Rave about George Lucas and rip on Peter Jackson. And I could argue back and forth between myself in an endless cycle, making statements like "SW vs. LotR the end of the debate....", and every 5 seconds I could come back and try to piss other people off for having a different oppinion than mine or liking somthing I don&#39;t. Making the soul point and purpose of my life to be the king of TB forums, and trashing every film for not being perfect. I could Possibly gain 400 to 800 pounds, cut off all social aspects of my life. And every time anyone starts a TB about something no matter what it is, I will immidiatly reverse it around to what I wan&#39;t to talk about it. I will no longer eat food, instead I will be fead intervieniusly (can&#39;t spell, can you tell) I will not ever leave my home, I will only watch films that have been bootleged, for I will not be able to afford the fork lift driver to transport my 550+ Pound body to the cinea plex, where the only way I could possibly sit in the theater was to be laid over the surface area of four Handicapped spots. I will have become so fat that the celluloid deposits on my eyelids will prevent my from opening my own eyes without the assistance of machines. Soon I will be so self-assured of my own oppinions that I will istently be able to tell if a film is good by simply hearing the title or seeing the trailor. I will start pointless pentions for ridicules causes just to frustrate others. I will simply exist to frustrate and harass others. I will act in direct oposition to the values that the films I claim to cherish. I will become the slimy dispicable sub-villian of said films. When I die it will take several days, possibly weeks for someone to find my decaying body. OR I could do something costructive. Have a discusion, like something and not care what other people think. Maybe I could actually right something, as many have claimed they can do better, if you can than please do, if you can make something that is creative and inspiring then do so. Do something!

  • May 10, 2002, 1:22 a.m. CST

    damn, can that girl write a bloody review...

    by a goonie

    i&#39;ve read other posts by her, of course, and once again, her writing impresses. good for her. i unfortunately haven&#39;t seen Attack yet, and i of course can&#39;t wait, but that means i have no idea how on par this review really is, as a an actual REVIEW. but hearing this mixed message here so beautifully played out was certainly an interesting change of pace. i found Alexandra&#39;s comments at the end about her attempts to justify her profoundly important love for a sci-fi/adventure series born out of a saturday matinee mentality to be quite touching. sad, too. i love Star Wars. A New Hope is a favourite movie of mine. A New Hope is a great movie. i looooove the sci-fi genre. Alien, Blade Runner, E.T., Star Wars, these are all favourite films of mine. then you have 2001: A Space Odyssey, tied with "magnolia" for the much-coveted spot of MY FAVOURITE MOTION PICTURE EVER. anyhow, i&#39;m looking forward to Attack. no matter what, i can&#39;t wait. but Spider-Man rules.

  • May 10, 2002, 1:43 a.m. CST

    You guys...sheesh.

    by The Killer-Goat

    Alexandra, I loved your review-- The spoiler-free parts, anyway. :) "Original Trilogy Was Campy, Too!" vs. "Why is this Not MY Star Wars?" Well, did George Lucas find a way 20 years later to tell a greater story than the originals, or didn&#39;t he? Can he actually craft a better experience than the 4-6 chapters we&#39;ve already witnessed? Will the pre-logy be better than the original tri-logy, or "just as good"? It&#39;s a tough task, and TPM was an awkward start. I agree with a previous post that the original films (ESB and ROTJ, at the least) were very "collaborative" efforts, creatively. George&#39;s story and direction relied on solid support to execute it, to make it be SEEN, with all the add-ins and ad-libs included in the final trimmings. If everyone answers to George, does George answer to anyone? I think Alexandra focused on the one point that I have a hard time adjusting to lately. Do I &#39;care&#39; anymore, or don&#39;t I? What&#39;s the balance between crazed anticipation and jaded objectivity? CAN you be objective and reserved about something like Star Wars? TPM was a great screening experience, but with only half the lingering nostalgia permeated from the original series. 3 years after that premiere, I&#39;m uneasy because of this lackluster feeling of having to keep all my excitement in check. I was a totally oblivious 9-year old to any "nation-wide ticket sale stats" or smarmy pro/con reviews when I saw ANH back in the middle of Saudi Arabia, in some tiny isolated expat. camp with an old 8mm projector on a wall. At this point, a repeat of the same experiences I got as a kid might be all I can hope for. Nothing more, nothing less.

  • May 10, 2002, 2:23 a.m. CST

    Screw "Flash Gordon" and "Buck Rogers!" If it weren&#39;t for Ak

    by Chishu_Ryu

    And yes, the Jedi Knight is a neo-outer space Samurai! Toshiro Mifune&#39;s General Watanabe was the main inspiration for Obi-Wan Kenobi, Qui-Gonn Jinn, and the Jedi mind trick! The Princess inspired Princess Leia! Those two greedy bumbling peasant guys inspired R2-D2 and C-3PO, and Han Solo and Chewbacca, as well! The village scene inspired Mos Eisley!And Lucas got inspired from other Kurosawa films! The secret hiding place in the Millenium Falcon scene in Episode IV was from "Sanjuro!" Man, I could go on all night! And George Lucas simply threw himself into the mix by creating a character called Luke Skywalker! Screw Joseph Campbell! Screw King Arthur legends! George Lucas owes everything to Akira Kurosawa! Long live Kurosawa! The true Jedi Master! And that&#39;s my two cents!

  • May 10, 2002, 2:55 a.m. CST

    One Last comment, and I shall post no more....

    by Intoxictd

    Let&#39;s not forget that any Star Wars movie, at heart, is an ACTION/Sci-Fi/Adventure movie. In the history of filmmaking, these types of movies have never been nominated, until LOTR recently, for an oscar of best picture. Yes, all movies in this genre do have holey storylines, and typically not the greatest acting. Do we not see them because of this? No. So why should a review stating all of these facts scare anyone enough not to see a movie? Incorporating major ACTION (or special effects) into a storyline, believably, is a hard thing to do. Why? Action is not necessary for the plot, it rather detaches a viewer from a plot for the few minutes an action sequence takes place. I have never read a good book that goes on page after page explaining exactly what action is taking place. It would sound funny as hell reading "This guy stepped left and shot his blaster and missed, ducked down, shot again and missed, the other guy shot back and just barely missed, and cursed, and fired a few more times, as the other guy fired back... Blah, blah, blah, blah on for the next few paragraphs." ACTION is not essential to any plot line, therefore seeing a movie with a lot of action being reviewed as having a "poor plot" is quite understandable. Does this mean that the movie sucks? HELL NO! Let&#39;s not forget that action movies are big blockbuster industries that pull in more money in one night, than any movie with an "exceptional story" does in a many days. Now that should make something clear, ACTION is in movies because the audience drools for it. It&#39;s entertainment. It&#39;s why we go to see movies...to have fun!!! To hear someone say the story sucked, and the acting is bad, believe them. It is quite believable considering the genre They&#39;re trained to look at these aspects, and have a good reason to write what they feel. Yet again, though, it is only their opinion. None of this is meant to say you can&#39;t enjoy the movie!!! If we went to see a Star Wars movie that was made more like "The Fellowship of the Ring", do you think it would ever have been popular? Star Wars is known and loved mainly for it&#39;s larger than life action sequences and special effects. Not ever for it&#39;s acting or complicated plot. Lets all just go see the movie and get sucked into the excitement. Let&#39;s try to enjoy it for what it is, not for what the critics wish it were. Also, to all of those people whom keep posting how much of a big Star Wars fan you used to be, but after TPM you wouldn&#39;t see another Star Wars movie....shut your stupidity up. Either you people are not Star Wars fans at all, simply posting negativity in hopes you can corrupt people into turning their backs on something they love. Or, you are fans, but not really a fan. First of all, its an insult to any object of fandom (whether it be a movie, a book, a sports team, or a band) to have fans like you. Saying that you won&#39;t go to see this movie because the last one sucked is pathetic, and shows no signs of intelligence. This is like saying that your favorite footbal team has won the first 6 games of their season (undefeated, in first place in their division), but, had a bad day, played lousy, and unfortunately lost the 7th game. Now do you think that they suck? Could there be no hopes of ever winning again because of that one loss? It&#39;s absolutely ridiculous!!! A true "FAN" sticks by that team, through good times, and bad. Those whom don&#39;t, get a clue. Nobody&#39;s perfect. And NO, though some may literally believe this :)....George Lucas is not GOD!!!! Is it so hard to believe that the poor man has made one lousy Star Wars movie? If anyone thinks so, stop being so naive. Every great director has that one, or maybe two even, embarrasingly made flick. So try to keep just a little bit of an open mind. To turn your back on him now because of TPM, well it&#39;s just an insult to the "True Fans" of anything in this world. Stop calling yourself fans if you can&#39;t get by this!!!

  • May 10, 2002, 3:08 a.m. CST

    oy vey

    by Tromaboy

    So the negative reviews have started, this quite posably being one of the most venemous I&#39;ve read.....I find it irritating, and strictly from a professionial standpoint apprehensable that people who don&#39;t like this movie feel the need to ruin every single surprise the movie may have to offer, great now we know 99% of the movie becuase you didn&#39;t like it and don&#39;t want people to go....they know the only way they can possably wreck the experience of seeing this movie is by revealing plot point after plot point, surprise twist after surprise twist in an attempt to take the steam out of the movie before any of us get a chance to see it.....if I was one of the lucky few who&#39;s films made it into theaters I would take note of those who reveal every part of my movie before it opens and bar them from press screanings, it saddens me greatly to see every intricat detail of a movie put into a film review....I remember watching entertainment tonite years ago and they told the ending to a movie, flat out told it, "bugsy dies in the end", or when on one episode of siskel and ebert they almost broke out in a fight cause one of the two threw out the secret of the Crying Game...Now when it comes to this movie, I don&#39;t really care, I read the book and I tell you right now if the book is any indication of how the movie is going to be, it&#39;s going to be amazing to see, however there are alot of people who visit sites like this, who haven&#39;t read the book, who aren&#39;t part of the lucky few who get into press screenings, and they get the wind taken out of their movie going experience cause some people can&#39;t keep there mouth shut.....now another thing I&#39;ve noticed is that alot of these negative reviews are by people who are self admittedly "former fans" of the series and all I have to say about that is if you aren&#39;t a fan politely turn down your press pass or give it to someone who is a fan so that someone who&#39;s going to enjoy the film will get that lucky chance to go see it early, the film isn&#39;t made for you it&#39;s made for fans of teh series, current fans that is, you won&#39;t see ebert reviewing Toxic Avenger 4 cause he&#39;s not a fan of Troma movies so you don&#39;t ever hear him talking about them ...I think if most people who reviewed movies stuck to movies that they are into we might actually get some honest reviews instead of horridly jaded ones directed specifically towards trying to get people not to go to the film, cause really is bashing this movie or any other going to get people not to go...sure maybe the ones who weren&#39;t going to go in the first place...but for (as my hero stan lee would put it) us true believers we&#39;ll be in line and some of us already have tickets and we will enjoy every moment of this film and those who think it will suck will still think it sucks.

  • May 10, 2002, 3:18 a.m. CST

    Kudos to Alex

    by ReindeerFlotilla

    I thought that this was a thoughtful, honest review - and certainly didn&#39;t deserve the "Pauline Kael wannabe" criticism posted here. The quality of reviews on AICN vary wildly - Alex is always worth reading, Moriarity too - whilst Harry can veer wildly from his OTT crap like BLADE 2 to passionate but considered stuff like Y TU MAMA TAMBIEN. As for AOTC - well, I&#39;m not as giddy to see it as I was TPM and i thought that movie let down the SW series even more than ROTJ) - but maybe the lowered expectations will help.

  • May 10, 2002, 4:06 a.m. CST

    Recent Review tally

    by Intoxictd

    I just thought I&#39;d take a tally of all of the reviews I could find. I read 48 total reviews: 33 were very positive reviews, 9 were "so-so", and 6 bashed the film. So that is 70% percent of those whom have viewed AOTC think its a roller coaster ride. They all agree it&#39;s not the greatest movie. Some dialogue was bad, some acting was bad, the plot was sketchy at times. However, they also agreed that "DAMN!!!!" it was a thrill ride and a great cinematic treat! 18% gave a mixed reaction; said the movie was great for these reasons, but not so great for other reasons. They also wouldn&#39;t mind seeing it again. Then there&#39;s those who thought this movie was horrible. They go on and on saying "The story sucked, the acting sucked, the effects sucked, the scenery sucked, and overall the movie just plain out sucked." Now the sad part is that most people will only listen to the poor reviews. Sounds kind of like "Who wants to be a Millionaire?" Why would you use the "Ask the Audience" Lifeline and take the minority for the final answer. Sounds kind of stupid, huh? Overall, a majority of the world (so far), loved this film! Why not put a little faith into that and see the movie.

  • May 10, 2002, 4:11 a.m. CST

    Playa Haters

    by YoYoMaMa

    All you suckers who are involved in these stupid "Movie X is better than Movie Y; Movie Y RAPED MY CHILDHOOD" need to get lives, seriously. At the end of the day all that matters is that George Lucas (and Sam Raimi and Peter Jackson and countless others) are out there CREATING while you sit on your dumb fat ass whining (in monosylablles) about what they create on anonymous Internet forums. How many of you would walk up to Lucas and tell him to his face that he sucks? Pshaw! Obviously the guy is creating work that means something to a lot of people, just look at the box office receipts. Who gives a fuck if it doesn&#39;t mean anything to you? Not me, not Lucas, not society. So shut the hell up. How many of you assmasters scream TPM sucks but watched in in the theatre 5 times on opening weekend? Ya&#39;ll just player hatin&#39;.

  • May 10, 2002, 4:18 a.m. CST

    Suck

    by YoYoMaMa

    Hey Tromaboy, you can&#39;t read a review and expect it to be spoiler-free...Unless it says, well Spoiler-free at the top or something. But I do agree with the underlying sentiment...I don&#39;t think its just when people dislike films, I think the vast majority of film critics these days just shouldn&#39;t be writing. This includes Ms DuPont and a few other of the regulars here. Not because she&#39;s a Pauline wanna be, or whatever else, but because like many so-called reviewers she just posts a summary of the film along with a list of "liked this, didnt like that". There&#39;s no real THOUGHT put into this review. As fucked up as fat Harry is, and how I cringe every time he makes a sexual reference in his reviews (which seems to be more and more these days...eww), at least he doesn&#39;t attempt to come off as anything other than a rabid fanboy, and so he&#39;s &#39;reviews&#39; are fine in that context. These other reviews, though, add nothing. Ms DuPont didn&#39;t like the movie that much. That&#39;s all that can be taken from this review...And I say..so? I don&#39;t know Ms DuPont, don&#39;t want to know her, and really don&#39;t care how she feels about AOTC, Pearl Harbor or anything else. That begs the question, I guess, of why I bothered to read and post here. Well to that I say, I guess I was just that fucking bored, ok?

  • I read with interest the review on the Star Wars Clones movie. An honest review, but the bit where

  • May 10, 2002, 9 a.m. CST

    reviews......

    by audio vandal

    who the hell cares what is being said about this movie..im just glad there is a star wars film out this year and that i was lucky enought o be growing up when these movies came out and i could appreciate the magic. Did phantom menace lose that magic ? Seeing as ive watched it 20 times i dont think so, its a star wars movie, no worse than ROTJ, i read loads of bad reviews about it and still went....AOTC will still be lining lucas&#39;s pockets in 10 years, all the negative press in the world cant stop that...

  • May 10, 2002, 9:14 a.m. CST

    Hey Moofaloo

    by Rate My Poo

    Lay off the "clever proverbs" will you? Thats "right", put away the "book". I have a saying, a rolling stone gathers "no moss". See how "annoying you are?"

  • May 10, 2002, 9:35 a.m. CST

    I&#39;m Sure R.H., Sarcastic Lesbian Filmmaker, Was Deeply Oppre

    by NoCureForFools

    and you know who gives a fuck? NOBODY. god, queer indignation is soooo fucking boring. so busy wallowing in your "opression" that you&#39;ve missed the fact that you&#39;ve been fully accepted by society years ago. maybe there are some amish people left who don&#39;t accept you, but basically everybody else does. get over it.

  • May 10, 2002, 9:41 a.m. CST

    ATOC down another 4% at Rotten Tomatoes

    by MinasTirith

    In over night scoring AOTC dropped another 4% closing at 58%. Todays outlook doesn&#39;t look great either. But I do expect a steady score of 58% or lower. This is not a Must See. http://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/StarWarsEpisodeIIAttackoftheClones-1112314/

  • May 10, 2002, 10:02 a.m. CST

    Pre-judgement

    by WARPED99

    I&#39;m getting more than a little sick of all the silly BS I&#39;m seeing on the boards. I know it&#39;s par for the course on AICN but for fuck&#39;s sake people, just wait till YOU see the movie before you start commenting about what LUCAS did wrong or how much you think you&#39;re going to hate this film or comparing it to another. Judge it on its own merits instead of by the over intellectualized babblings of a pseudo professional film buff. Jesus H Jumping CHRIST how fucking childish can you possibly get? Just go see the damn thing, leave your preconceptions at the door and try to have a good time.

  • May 10, 2002, 10:35 a.m. CST

    Here&#39;s the NY Times&#39; review - read it & weep, fanboys

    by Blabbermouse

    Boy, did this critic get YOUR number(s)... [the original posting is at http://www.nytimes.com/2002/05/10/movies/10STAR.html] Kicking Up Cosmic Dust By A. O. SCOTT FTER sitting through "Star Wars: Episode II

  • May 10, 2002, 10:47 a.m. CST

    I can&#39;t takes no more.....

    by justsomedude

    Alright people I am a shadow man on this sight...I read the reviews and critiques(oh btw Harry your doing a great job..keep it up...that goes for all of your partners in crime.... Morarity sorry about your loss)and I almost never reply in the talkback because conversations get pretty volatile, pointless, childish, and circular. Most people want to flame or incite something...so I pretty much steer clear(most likely this reply will be lost in the countless replies this topic educes). On the other side of things, people spend an inorderiate amount of time defending something they love(don&#39;t we all). My biggest suggestion to that side of the story(even the level headed contributors...thank God for you guys..you know who you are)is why bother? Don&#39;t spend this much time wasting precious moments of your life defending something that doesn&#39;t need to be defended. I love Star Wars as much as the next guy(going to see it at the Ziegfield in New York on the 16th..will be my second time :))but let&#39;s not try to convert the unconvertible. People have their opinions(regardless if they are right or wrong)and you have to respect that. Ms. Dupont, I have the deepest respect for your intellectual response and analysis(I believe all that in-depth critique though would be appropriate for other films and not Star Wars). However I must make one suggestion to you as a reader of your reviews(yet, I agree with about zero of them...yes that is right..um zero:)). Actually, I have two recommendations..one you spend way too much time concentrating on the negative...way WAY too much in almost all of your reviews. I know woman can be pretty neurotic(no offense to all the ladies out there...just my experience in life)and you can be pretty extreme in your opinion... But let&#39;s be honest, this movie had a lot of things going right with it and you should have done a 50/50% slant on the review discussing the bad as well as the good(that would have made your review a level-headed piece). Sadly, this review(more so than others)seems to be an endless negative banter that is counterproductive and disrespectful(i.e. entertainment weekly) to not only this movie but critiquing any art form in general. If you are that hateful of this movie(you don&#39;t seem to be and why would you? This movie was amazing)...that if you really couldn&#39;t find any redeeming qualities the review should have been short, simple, and to the point. The best Reviewers, who see the films they do not like, do not want to absolutely destroy the film(destroying a film is a lot easier than creating one), instead they simply say they don&#39;t like a film...discuss why...and than move on(because it shouldn&#39;t be an issue to them..why concentrate on something lousy?) Sadly, you fall victim to a long-winded, and convoluted review that seems to show you are pretty damn torn on this film(I could be wrong but I might think you would benefit from repeat viewings). Um, that is about it...just take it for what it is worth...again I appreciate your opinion(you are entitled..as all of your friends are as well). Secondly, do the board a favor...watch the original trilogy again...and give us a three part critique(I mean seudo-intellectual critique at the same caliber of your review of AOTC)of all the original movies. I want you to give us a levelheaded and completely merciless review of those films(acting, editing, sound, special effects, plot, dialogue, characterizations etc)from your perspective as an adult. I think it would be quite an intriguing read for everyone on this board(I would certainly read it). Again, thank you Ms. Dupont, perhaps one of these days we will come to the same opinion of at least one movie(I&#39;ll keep my fingers crossed). Anywho, to the more important things at hand. I am a levelheaded Star Wars fan as they go..I am not fanatical..I don&#39;t buy the endless novels, books, toys, spandex, cereals, panties, socks, shoes, backpacks, lunchboxes, videogames(well not most of them...Jedi Outcast rules), posters, life-size anatomically correct dolls, and other frivolous items that Uncle George provides(hey supply and demand I can&#39;t stop that). I would say that I am more of a fan of movies in general(my favorite director is David Lean)than strictly Star Wars(holds special place in my heart). I go to college, I work a fulltime job(waiting tables sucks)and pretty much any free time I spend deals with working out and maintain a healthy lifestyle. My life is pretty focused, yet chaotic at times(However I get by). I do not have the freedom with my time discussing every issue, nuance, problem, argument, news, and reports in the world of Star Wars(although I do frequent...early in the day..Harry&#39;s site, as well as theforce.net). With that said, yes I have seen Attack of the Clone&#39;s(A friend of mine works at a theater and invited me the other night to watch a "Prepping" presentation..he could bring one friend or family member..nice guy ain&#39;t he?), yes it the best Star Wars movie since the Empire Strikes Back(although Empire still numero uno in my book). Yes, it will do amazing business that will probably eclipse the Phantom Menace and best Titanic(Don&#39;t know about Spiderman opening weekend thing..It

  • May 10, 2002, 11:24 a.m. CST

    Damn, that NY Times review is funny!

    by minderbinder

  • May 10, 2002, 11:26 a.m. CST

    NewsFlash: Suprise! Snobby B*tch doesn&#39;t like a Star Wars M

    by The_Great_Skeeve

    What a huge display of pretentiousness Ms. Dupont puts on. Even her graphic is pretentious. Someone like her is NOT going to like the Fanboy Friendly types of movies that this site is all about. Why is she writing here? She&#39;s obviously a snob but strangely felt compelled to write a Star Wars review. Could it be that that was the only way anyone would even pay attention to her self important opinions? Could be... Her pretentious crowd of movie snobs should stick to the arthouse movies about gay cowboys eating pudding and leave entertaining movies alone.

  • May 10, 2002, 12:28 p.m. CST

    Hey! You can&#39;t spell "Robardsinator"..

    by VonSpark

    ..without "bastard"..!------------------------------------------------ I&#39;m gonna guess (based on his mastery of the profane) that like "The Great Skeeve", intelligent, thought-provoking, detailed AND fair critique somehow equates pretention. Those with a shockingly limited view are often intimidated by others with abilities of expression and reason, and when it&#39;s a woman...you can count on a knuckle-draggin&#39; dolt to use words like "cunt".--------------------------------------------------- Please BOYS, don&#39;t let your fear of a chick being your intellectual superior guide you like cattle to the slaughterhouse. Seems there are plenty of fellas here who can take it. Certainly, it doesn&#39;t make any of us who ever loved one or ALL of these popcorn flicks feel good to be a REAL fan, and it renders your opinion as meaningful as a statement of truth from the Bush White House.---------------------------------------And now, someone PLEASE prove me right by calling me a "fag" or something as illuminating or original. You&#39;re on the clock.

  • May 10, 2002, 12:49 p.m. CST

    episode 2 is on IRC already

    by HKaos

    everyone quit speculating on wether its going to be good ro not, and go get it. since its on IRC distros right now, it&#39;ll just be a short time till its on edonkey, kazaa, etc...... and it is much better than episode 1, which of course isnt saying much, so take that for what its worth. go download it and see for yourself.

  • May 10, 2002, 1:29 p.m. CST

    By Far The Funniest Thing I&#39;ve Seen Here Is Foul Mouthed STA

    by Buzz Maverik

    Boys, if you are at a place where you can write things like, "That fuckin&#39; lesbo-dyke bitch of a yeast infection had better like STAR WARS or...or...somethin&#39;" then it&#39;s time for you to find yourselves entertainment that is less innocent in nature. You&#39;re ready for Scorcese and De Palma. Yes, there&#39;s no robots or pixies but you get a guy cutting another guy&#39;s arm off with chainsaw in SCARFACE, and you get to see De Niro shoot up some pimps in TAXI DRIVER. Or, for a change of pace, you could watch BASIC INSTINCT and see some girl on girl action. But if you&#39;re talkin&#39; the trash you&#39;re writing, there&#39;s no place for your minds in a galaxy of swashbucklers, scheming villains, wacky creatures and chaste romances. And that&#39;s okay. If you saw your God&#39;s film AMERICAN GRAFFITI, you&#39;d know that we all have to leave Tatooine sometime. The good news is that you get to return, when you&#39;re ready to get in touch with you innocence and your youth. Right now, it&#39;s just too weird hearing you talk like Tony Montana or Jake La Motta about a film full of Ewoks and Gungans. Of course, it&#39;s not as weird as some of the cussings out I got from HARRY POTTER fans when I made a few jokes on their talkbacks. Man, I never heard such language and I was in the Army.

  • May 10, 2002, 1:44 p.m. CST

    January 10, 2005 -- Skywalker Ranch. George&#39;s Office.

    by Buzz Maverik

    Rick McCallum was nervous. His boss, George Lucas, did not like to be questioned about his creative decisions and Rick respected that. After all, George was a genius. But Rick couldn&#39;t keep silent. "George...uh, I saw a print of EPISODE 3: MYSTERY OF THE HIDDEN BINKS...." "Uh huh." "The thing is, George...we have a May release date..." "Of course. That&#39;s our tradition." "George, the film is blank!" "So?" "So? The fans are expecting a story. We can&#39;t release a blank film." "Do you really think it&#39;ll make a difference, Rick? They&#39;ll see it and they&#39;ll love it." "I&#39;m not so sure." "I am, Rick. Here, I&#39;ll prove it," George said, and he drew a whistle from the pocket of his flannel shirt. Placing the whistle between his lips, he blasted out a note that only Lucas-worshippers are able to hear. Three typical Lucasians (fans that go waaay too far) stepped out of the closet. George said, "Rick, I&#39;d like to you meet...what&#39;re your names again?" "Max Rebo." "Ben Quadranaros." "Dagobah Dirk." "Right. You&#39;ve seen Episode 3, right boys? Tell Rick what you thought out it." "Incredible." "Better&#39;n&#39; EMPIRE and nuthin&#39;s better&#39;n&#39; EMPIRE." "Bee-yatchin&#39;!" Rick scratched his head and said,"But guys, it&#39;s a blank film." The boys overlapped each other with their responses: "YOU HATERS HATE BECAUSE YOU HATE! FUCK THE CRITICS! YOU WOULD HAVE SAID THE SAME THING ABOUT EMPIRE IF IT WERE BLANK! I&#39;M SEEIN&#39; THIS A BILLION TIMES! LET&#39;S GO FIND A THEATER AND STAND IN LINE FOR THE NEXT FIVE MONTHS!" "I&#39;ll be in my office if you need me, George," Rick said as he left.

  • May 10, 2002, 2:35 p.m. CST

    Who cares what anyone else says...

    by wackdoodle

    it&#39;s what we think individually of AOTC that matters. The film will do huge box office, but it won&#39;t please everybody and who cares! None of the SW films have been critical darlings and everyone who has seen them has varying opinons on what&#39;s good and bad and which is their favorite. We all need to admit that it is a movie. It has flaws, it&#39;s never going to fulfill your personal fantasy of what you think should happen. As a fan I must acknowledge that the Star Wars movies have always had cheesy, whiny, hookey dialog. But is you focus on that you entirely miss the point of the movies, they capture your imagination and take you to another world for 2 hours. If you waste your time dissecting and discussing and critising George Lucas for what does with his own freakin creation, your dumber than anyone could ever imagine. Lucas can do as he likes after all he created Star Wars, he pays for them with his own profits, it&#39;s his to grow or destory as HE sees fit. Also, Citizen Cane is not the great movie ever made. The greatest movie ever made is whatever movie moved you or that you enjoyed. Whether its Ernest Goes to Jail or Lawrence or Arabia, movies are personal so if you like the movie you like it. Don&#39;t get defensive about a movie! Again, who cares if your friend or the self-important critic doesn&#39;t who asked their opinion anyway. Rock on Mr. Lucas, thank you for the wonderful gift of Star Wars.

  • May 10, 2002, 4:18 p.m. CST

    Negative talkbackers...

    by justsomedude

    All I have to say to people like ringbearer or general custard...who seem to take a euphoric pleasure out of all the negativity...go to rotten tomatoes and see(unlike TPM)...the reviews scale is becoming more positive not negative! Take some advice..for what is it is worth...smoke a joint...calm your nerves..cause on May 16th(if you choose to go..and why do I have a hunch you will)...you will be horribly dissapointed in how cool this movie actually is! BTW, just to get my two cents in on LOFR..not that it matters...The movie was pretty good...certainly not great like some people would suggest. Having read all of Tolkien&#39;s books(as well as C.S. Lewis&#39;s Narnia books..which I prefer)..it wasn&#39;t that bang up of a job. Infact some of the movie had some pretty awful parts(some the CGI was laughably bad...legolas and the cave troll..I still Cringe). BTW, the worst part of LOTR was the directing and editing(P.J. is a novice in epic storytelling and wow did it show..hoping TT is a better outing). Anyway, had my chance to show the flaws of FOTR(My friend positivly loathed it..infact I was the only one between my father and myself who truly found merit out of it). Oh well, the movie was still pretty good..but could have been a whole lot more. If P.J. had been more of risk taker he could have added some of the songs and poetic verses that flood the books(would have been nice to see the barrenwhatevers). Oh well, if only Spielberg had done those movies..I think it would have been alot more endearing. The acting left alot to be desired as well(cept of McKellin/lee and the guy who played Bilbo..I can&#39;t believe I can&#39;t remember his name). But P.J. seems to like to pander a bit...I am not going to go any further! But, see how easy it is to break down a movie..even a pretty good movie like FOTR? heh..some people will never learn..continue your flames guys and I hope for your sakes that TT is the greatest thing since sex(you guys have had sex...correct?)

  • May 10, 2002, 4:29 p.m. CST

    Von Dorko

    by Robardsinator

    The funny thing about you is that you think you&#39;ve nailed me on the head. You haven&#39;t nailed shit. You&#39;re a coffeehouse pseudo intellect wannabe and that&#39;s your problem. I&#39;m offended that a moron like you thinks that I&#39;m mentally challeneged by some computer personality. You&#39;re trying to be online Spartacus and I have you figured out. Pull your head out of your ass, realize that your film ideas are hack induced dogshit and most importantly, get some sunlight. Thats all i&#39;m going to reply ever again. This site sucks. Look at all of you, you&#39;re a fucking joke. They should change this site to moviepoopshoot.com.... kevin smith is by all means no genius but he has all you losers portrayed perfectly. oh and Von Douchebag..go fuck yourself..youre probably a faggot or a dyke. Nice and trendy dyke...go read some oprah and rosie mags in the coffeehouse

  • May 10, 2002, 4:56 p.m. CST

    Alexandra DuPont, perhaps foolhardily, responds to her critics..

    by Alexandra.DuPont

    I just want to make sure I&#39;ve got many of y&#39;all&#39;s comments fully processed here: (1) I&#39;m a third-class Pauline Kael. Guess I&#39;ll have to read her books sometime, as everyone keeps telling me I&#39;m trying to be her. (2) I&#39;m not allowed to express my personal, subjective opinion in a review that is clearly written by me. Instead, I need to, as some of you have put it, "face facts" -- those "facts" being YOUR personal, honest opinions. Well, I&#39;m so glad I&#39;ve got that straight. However, I do want to address a few comments that keep recurring in these remarkable Talk Backs, which I love reading: (1) For those who keep telling me variations on the comment, "Take AOTC for what it is -- ENTERTAINMENT!" Strangely, I thought that&#39;s EXACTLY what I ended up doing. In the intro and closing of my review, if memory serves, didn&#39;t I write that I basically took my brain off the hook and enjoyed the film on its merits the moment I saw the "Mysterious Island" Harryhausen homage during the climactic battle? I think some of you are confusing my opinions (and they are ONLY my opinions, nothing more) with those of Alina DeVries. I thought my opinion of the film was MIXED with more than a few strong positives, not negative. Apparently I was wrong. (2) And as for those who keep building up this absurd LOTR-vs.-SW debate: There is no "war" between LOTR fans and SW fans, except in the minds of perhaps a few hundred AICN readers. Last I checked, most geeks were paying full admission to both films. It&#39;s sort of hilarious that readers here are taking me to task for not enjoying AOTC as "mere entertainment," but then map out this massive conflict between two film series that frankly does not exist except in the mind of a zealot. Take a look in the mirror; are you truly that angry with me? Is this really all that important? Warmest, A.DuP., who is, apparently, a "cunt." How droll!

  • May 10, 2002, 5:07 p.m. CST

    For what its worth...

    by m2298

    A.O. Scott, the NY TIMES crtic that skewered AOTC was the only critic I know of that liked (loved?) FREDDY GOT FINGERED.

  • May 10, 2002, 5:09 p.m. CST

    "I don&#39;t like the sand. It&#39;s coarse and rough and irrita

    by NoCureForFools

    oh...my...god. okay, i&#39;m still really psyched for AOTC. i pretty much expected that the romance would be fairly ridiculous. but this... this is an actual line of dialouge? how does Padme answer this? "thanks...uh, Anakin, your uh... lot nicer than sand too... uh... i think i&#39;m gonna go over here now..." does Anakin than follow up with: "So, do you like... stuff?" you know what, though, Star Wars has always been about the cheese. this, although totally fucking hilariously bad and campy, doesn&#39;t really change my mind about seeing it. it looks like it&#39;ll be fun, i&#39;m sure i&#39;ll enjoy myself, and i&#39;m sure the rest of you, if you can GET OVER YOURSELVES, will enjoy it to. is it going to change you life, no. will it be fun? most likely. is it going to be better than the original films? no way in hell. that&#39;s fine, though. if you were old enough to see the original release and exptect the film to effect you in the same you, you are insane and should seek counseling. please stop pretending that Star Wars was this poetic masterpiece, because it never really was. it was just a cool, fun and sentimental B-Movie series on an A-Movie budget. that&#39;s it. also: it&#39;s largely for kids. get over it.

  • May 10, 2002, 5:51 p.m. CST

    So, by the logic presented in this talkback...

    by Aquafresh

    ..."Star Wars" cannot be criticised for bad performances & dialouge. Hmmmmm. Are we then to presume that if Episode 3 comes out and features good acting and decent dialouge, then it is a &#39;bad&#39; "Star Wars" film? Just curious. I&#39;m not holding my breath or anything.

  • May 10, 2002, 5:59 p.m. CST

    p.s., I&#39;m no hater

    by Aquafresh

    I allready have a ticket to a Sunday night showing of "Clones", & I gaurantee I&#39;ll have a good time watching it. I just think the way some of you argue against criticism is sub-moronic. Thats all. Bye.

  • May 10, 2002, 6:35 p.m. CST

    Ms. Dupont

    by justsomedude

    Thank you...Ms.Dupont for replying to your messages. I can appreciate everything you are saying(having seen the film..which I wish I had not seen because the anticipation to see it again is killing me :)). Yet, to be fair your use of words and the flow of your review cetainly seems skewed to the negative(whether intentional or not)! That doesn&#39;t mean I don&#39;t appreciate your comments..on the contrary it is very mature of you to answer all of these "interesting" replies. But, having sat on this movie..played out in my mind...the more and more I think about it...I postivily love this movie(infact I watched TMP again and it is starting to grow on me more and more..the way Lucas links these movies together is very clever writing)! I think the only big shame is that we have all grown up and we don&#39;t have the same nostalgia and wonder(hate to sound like a broken record) which we grew up with(God I wish I was five years old again). Everyone has extrememly different opinions, and life experiences that shape their lives as well as how they view certain things(movies are no exception). I will give you an example...when I was growing up I thought Return of the Jedi was the best Star Wars movie of the films. I liked the fact that Luke had a Green lightsaber(my fav color at the time). I loved the ewoks, and I even thought that the lightsaber battle,at the end, was the best action sequence ever filmed. I didn&#39;t like Empire that much because it scared the crap out of me. A New Hope..I liked...but it was boring in parts..and there was no Yoda..so I didn&#39;t like it as much. But as I grew older, I watched Empire..and I saw all of these emotional sequences..saw Luke&#39;s trials and tribulations in a New Hope..and I identified with them...when I watched Jedi it was just filled with muppets..some cool fights..but alot of boring exposition. I guess what I am trying to say the strongest as well as weakest part of these films is that each film is skewed to a different audience. Lucas wants to take us through an exploration of life in a galaxy far far away. We have times when we are childish(TPM)..where we fall in love(ATOC)...where we make the wrong decisions and do the wrong things(episode 3)..where we break away from our comfort zones(A New Hope)..where we see that people are flawed and don&#39;t know what to do(Empire)..how we learn from our mistakes and grow as individuals to become better people(Jedi)...I know it is overanalysing..but if you want to get deep..there ya go. The problem is we can only identify/appreciate with these tones and themes at certain times of our lives. I think apart of me wishes that he had never made the OT so that we could all be horribly shocked as to how these movies will pan out. Then again, I think it would have probably been too much of a downer for people in the end(now that they know the end result...they will go anyways...kinda like fascination with a train wreck). Well, just thought I would add...again I think you should do a critical analysis of the original films...thank you and God bless

  • May 10, 2002, 6:35 p.m. CST

    Okay, Alexandra, The STAR WARS/LOTR Thing, They&#39;re Not Calli

    by Buzz Maverik

    I spent three days in a motel room in Santa Rosa. Three days drinking, smoking Camels and praying for a mission...and for my sins, they gave me one. Top brass at Skywalker was sending me after Kurtz. Kurtz had once been big in the STAR WARS organization, but there were reports that he&#39;d gone native, crossed over to the LORD OF THE RINGS front. I would be driven down Interstate 5 by a crew of STAR WARS geeks that included Uncool, Hance who was regularly beaten up by surfers, Chewie and the Grand Moff. It might have been my mission but was sure as hell the Grand Moff&#39;s parents&#39; mini-van. We were airlifted into a hot DMZ by a crew lead by Darth Gore. He took out an entire rec room full of Hobbit-wannabees just so he could play Magic the Gathering. "Bilbo doesn&#39;t play," he kept screaming. By the time we got to Kurtz, it was just me and Hance left alive. And what of Kurtz, the great man himself. He sat in the dark, flipping through THE ART OF ATTACK OF THE CLONES, $35.00 plus tax, whispering, "The horror. The horror."

  • May 10, 2002, 9:01 p.m. CST

    Don&#39;t let the door hit you in the butt on the way out, Robar

    by Noriko Takaya

    If this site sucks it&#39;s because of bitter, perpetually angry losers such as yourself who can&#39;t make a point without flaming and who&#39;s every fourth word is "fuck!" You won&#39;t be missed. Meanwhile, I&#39;m off to see SPIDER-MAN, and get advance tix to Ep. 2!! Toppu o Nerae!

  • May 10, 2002, 9:04 p.m. CST

    Alexandra, a standing ovation to you!!!

    by Intoxictd

    I loved your post to these TB enemies of yours. I read your review, and appreciate all the honesty. I myself did not think "your review" was a negative review. Perhaps the ending, with your friends ideas on the movie, is the negative part. Why everyone is confusing that, I don&#39;t know. The really confusing part is why everyone takes a complete stranger&#39;s "opinion" of a movie so seriously! It is another persons opinion, not theirs. Can they still like something that you don&#39;t. YES!!! I see it everyday in all areas of life. Whether it be a movie, TV Show restaurant, cereal, or something as simple as color. Every individual has their own preference for everything. To insult someone, especially as vulgar as a lot of these idiots have been, is completely childish. IT IS TIME FOR YOU PEOPLE TO GROW UP!! Anyway Alexandra, just wanted to compliment you. I&#39;m a big Star Wars fan, and no matter how many bad reviews I see, I&#39;ll probably still enjoy the movie (for the most part :P) Can&#39;t wait to read your review on Episode III.

  • May 10, 2002, 9:24 p.m. CST

    Shade, you&#39;re wrong

    by Seepgood

    The funniest thing about this talkback is that it&#39;s full of people who haven&#39;t seen a film giving those who have seen it lectures on why they&#39;re wrong about it. Gotta love TB...

  • May 10, 2002, 9:41 p.m. CST

    very good robardsinator

    by kojiro

    Four hours and 41 seconds, I&#39;m sure Von Spark will be quite impressed. I wonder what else we can get you to do? Oooh, I know! Say something bad about kikes now. That&#39;ll show us how insightful you are!------------Fuckin A orionsangel I think we get the fucking point: you don&#39;t consider the NY Times&#39; opinion to be worth shit. Now please get over it, and over yourself-----------Hey Buzz, on that note maybe you should check this out. http://www.consumptionjunction.com/feat/cc/detail.asp?ID=9166 Seems up your alley. If you happen to be at work (yeah, like you have a job, right?) you may not be able to access it.

  • May 11, 2002, 3:08 a.m. CST

    like lemmings to the edge of a cliff...

    by dobeba

    I appreciate thoughtful criticism, even if I don&#39;t necessarily agree with it. I&#39;ll even appreciate an amusing rant. I haven&#39;t seen AOTC yet. I plan to. And I&#39;ve read the reviews, too. But c&#39;mon, I happen to know I don&#39;t need anyone&#39;s written opinion to predict how I&#39;m going to feel about a film. Like most people of reasonable intelligence, I prefer to see it before I praise it or slam it. My God, I&#39;m nearly convinced that there are those of you who are probably but inexplicably serious when you say, "Well that confirms it. The movie sucked because someone else said so, so I won&#39;t have to see it and risk having opinions based on my own experience." I love movies and the movie-going experience. There&#39;s magic in seing a movie in a darkened theatre with a room full of strangers who love movies too. That&#39;s more magic than spending a few hours behind the computer terminal talking about why certain movies have lost *their* magic. Let&#39;s not ever lose the experience, ladies and gents. Be honest with your assessments; but hey, let&#39;s be respectful, too.

  • May 11, 2002, 5:43 a.m. CST

    Ain&#39;t It Cool News, Talkback...

    by Vicconius

    ...you&#39;ll never find a more wretched hive of scorn and idiocy.

  • May 11, 2002, 9:06 a.m. CST

    Well this is certainly positive.....

    by justsomedude

    Looks like my comments have rubbed off on some people...kudios to all of us who are faithful and respectful! Maybe talkback will be a better place to be(I might start replying more often)

  • May 11, 2002, 11:43 a.m. CST

    Total Praise from Orlando&#39;s Press Screening!!

    by hoorayforeric

    Okay... So far the Good really outweighs the bad BIGTIME on this one!! My friend got to see at at Pleasure Island last week during a Press Screening and said it was "WONDERFUL!" He said the audience was thrilled! He heard local critics talking really high on it!! My friend has been the most critical person when it comes to movies...especially TPM! I&#39;ll take his word! As far as other critics It looks like Ebert is lost in his world of Non-Digital and is shouting out about it! Ebert gave Gladiator one star...It won best Picture. Ebert hated Spidey...most of the nation loved it. Who cares about NY Times.

  • May 11, 2002, 12:45 p.m. CST

    The only thing she got right....

    by FimbulWinter

    Is the absolutely preposterous standard(s) applied to these new movies based on 20+ years of pseudo-intellectual deconstruction of the original films. There is nothing about AOTC that is fundmentally a departure from the original films (I&#39;ve seen it). Every word spoken, every image shown and every note heard in these new films is scrutinized to a critical degree that is laughably impossible to refute or even argue. I would challenge anyone to hold up ANY popular film made in the last 10-15 years to this type of hyper-analysis and come away with anything consitently positive to say. If it can be said, far too many "fans" and moviegoers and media types have inserted themselves into the process of making these movies. It&#39;s not enough to watch a movie anymore, now we bicker and bitch as much about the motivations and actions of the people MAKING the movie as the motivations (not matter how banal if that&#39;s your view) and actions of characters on the screen. You can easily see that people are more interested in guessing/knowing "where George Lucas stood off-camera while shooting this scene" than anything going on in any one scene itself. The artiface of moviemaking (and the study of the making of THESE films in particular) is revealed to such a degree that for some people the screen is no longer a boundary that they cannot make themselves not peer through. Look, I love Star Wars and I know many of you do too but everyone has to step back and really acnknowledge the amount of import assigned to this story and these films. Hell, when the original movie came out it was largely dismissed by the criticial elite as a confection. Despite their populist appeal, the following sequels were also greeted similarly in critical circles, if not by moviegoers. This has ALWAYS been a series/story that is as deep and mythic or as shallow and hackneyed as you want it to be. The difference nowadays is that in our hyper saturated media culture, no common thought among any group of people (no matter how great or small) can pass without cultural comment or critique, no matter one&#39;s qualification or preparedness for debating the (whatever) topic. Because EVERYONE has a voice now doesn&#39;t mean that opinions have changed, it just means that you, me, we hear that many more of them. In this case I would say that ignorance definitely WAS bliss. AOTC has all of the best (and worst, if you choose to seek them out and dwell on them) elements of the series. If you don&#39;t know better by now (after 4 movies!) nothing anyone says is going to educate you or change your mind, much less another episode in the series. I for one still appreciate movies made by a storyteller without using focus groups, Cingular Wireless ads in the middle of the screen, or conscious regard for the limitations of the medium. If the story strains here and there because of some external logic applied that has never believably occupied space with these films to begin with it&#39;s something I really couldn&#39;t care less about and I don&#39;t think most people should either. I&#39;m not saying that marketing doesn&#39;t play a role that colors some (many) people&#39;s perceptions of these movies but at least there is a separation between the store aisle and the theatre aisle. One cannot say the same for almost any other movie made or relesed on this scale. I guess my point of view is that these (new) movies were largely made in the first place for the fans. It&#39;s just too bad that people still feel they are owed something more than the chance to hear more of the story (like the chance to have their version of it made).

  • May 11, 2002, 1:28 p.m. CST

    Does anyone els out there...........

    by OWNERX

    ........think that you&#39;re taking it a little too seriously? Doesn&#39;t anyone get drunk and laid anymore?

  • May 11, 2002, 1:31 p.m. CST

    Aw, jeeze....

    by obi-gabe

    You know, for as crappy as TPM alledgedly is, there sure were a lot of hypocritical asshoes that went to see it a bunch of times to have it make over 430 million bucks. Usually shitty movies make no money. Go figure! I enjoyed TPM mostly because a) I could a shit what critics think and b) I could give a shit what anyone else thinks. I don&#39;t TPM was the best movie ever by any stretch, but I found it entertaining, so fuck everyone who disagrees with me. That&#39;s my opinion, it can&#39;t be wrong-- it just is. You don&#39;t like Star Wars, then quit fucking bitching about it and don&#39;t watch the movie. Too many of these fucking fanboys keep saying, "Oh, LOTR kicks SW&#39;s ass!" or "Spider-Man wipes SW&#39;s ass." Now, correct me if I&#39;m wrong, but I am sure that a movies do not have asses. An inanimate object cannot start a fight with another inanimate object. Sorry guys, that&#39;s just the rules of physics and, well, reality. I&#39;m convinces that most people who bitch about particular movies here don&#39;t even like movies. They like one particular series of films. Which series is better? LOTR? MiB? SW? Spider-Man? James Bond? Who cares? I personally, liked LOTR, Spider-Man, and Star Wars. They are all good movies, in my opinion. And frankly, they are just movies. I don&#39;t care how much bank one movie makes because I don&#39;t watch movies strictly for their popularity like many of the sheep here that flock to one series because that&#39;s the cool thing. What are you poor souls going to do IF the next Matrix movie stinks? What IF the next LOTR movies totally sucks? You just gonna bitch and moan about it for the rest of eternity until you latch on to the next big thing and say that you ALWAYS loved the new big thing. If you don&#39;t like it-- don&#39;t watch. If you do-- watch. But for fuck&#39;s sake, just enjoy movies. Shit-- even a bad Star Wars movie is better than a Barbra Streisand flick any fucking day! Unless, of course, some of you fuck holes like Barbra Streisand movies...

  • Think goddamit. Use your brains.

  • May 11, 2002, 2:19 p.m. CST

    Yeah and that&#39;s the prime EXCUSE

    by Shaggins

    Just shut your fucking mouth. What do you think everyone buys that shit? Understand that 77% of the people who heard that Spiderman made $41 million on its first day immediately thought about AOTC. Ask yourself why.

  • May 11, 2002, 2:24 p.m. CST

    It&#39;s a summer movie, enjoy it for that.

    by stinky_smeagol

  • May 11, 2002, 2:28 p.m. CST

    I hate people who talk like you stinky

    by Shaggins

    What are you talking about? Do you really want to live in a world where Spider-Man sits above all the Star Wars movies in box office charts? Where the fastest openers are movies like Harry Potter? Where fucking hobbits are considered mor hip than jawas? I certainly don&#39;t.

  • May 11, 2002, 2:37 p.m. CST

    I mean you can&#39;t tell

    by stinky_smeagol

    me that you didn&#39;t cringe when you saw that "forbidden love" trailer in the theater. It was all there in front of us: the bad dialogue, the far too CGI too extreme special effects, and the really repulsive acting by Portman (who you can just tell thinks that Star Wars is stupid and cares not at all)and by Christensen (sic?) who looks like he couldn&#39;t act himself out of a wet paper bag. I really think that what would benefit everyone is to take this movie for what it is: something fun to go with your popcorn and air conditioning in a theater near you. It&#39;s a summer movie, period. Nothing more. It&#39;s like Batman or Jurassic Park. Enjoy the ride. And take some time this week to rewatch the classic trilogy. It was better, yes, but not by a whole lot. The acting still sucked, the dialog was rotten and the story was inconsistant and jumpy as hell. They were great fun and I think that if you keep in perspective their shortcomings you might just enjoy this new trilogy too.

  • May 11, 2002, 3:07 p.m. CST

    Child vs. grown-up responses

    by yo0o0oy

    If growing up makes us cranky and over critical, then why did I instantly love Looney Tunes and not care for Disney short cartoons in my own childhood? The Disney pieces talked down to the audience and had no repeat viewing value, while I could happily watch Bugs and Yosemite Sam on the pirate ship every week. I started questioning the Lucas=Genius myth in the 1980s when a tedious documentary aired where he went on and on about how interesting "man-machine relationships" were. DuPont, keep up the perceptive work!

  • Star Wars bashing is soooooooo 3 years ago. You guys are about as cool and rebelious as Entertainment Weekly. To be cool this year, Harry Potter bashing is where it&#39;s at for the begining rebel. And to look like a real true rebel, Spiderman bashing is the in thing to do. While the square, boring mainstream media pretends to be hip by hyping the god-awful Spiderman, me and my friends started keeping it real, and we&#39;re all like &#39;Spiderman sucks!&#39;, &#39;Fuck Spiderman!&#39;, &#39;Green Goblin looked like an arch villian from Power Rangers!&#39; and cool stuff like that. Now we&#39;re recognized as true rebel internet film buffs and stuff and get a lot of respect on the internet where nothing anybody says ever means shit. Yup, I feel much better about myself now. Don&#39;t be left out....join in now before everybody else does!

  • May 11, 2002, 5:20 p.m. CST

    Updated Approval Standings...

    by Intoxictd

    I&#39;m updating the approval ratings that I posted earlier. They&#39;re hovering basically the same, with a small increase in approval for the movie. YES...this list does contain Roger Ebert, Entertainment Weekly, The NY Times, and also Ms. DuPont & her friends. Of the now 62 reviews I have read.-------------71% give AOTC a good to excellent rating-----------17% give it an average rating (they liked it, but it wasn&#39;t nearly as good as it should be)--------------and of course, 12% say the movie is miserable. From what I see, more people really love the movie, and it outweighs those whom don&#39;t. So don&#39;t worry about it. Go see the movie and have a "blast". I still can&#39;t get over all of those reviews stating how exciting, and how much of a "CINEMATIC TREAT" that AOTC is. Will this beat Spiderman&#39;s record setting? NO. It can&#39;t even compete. It starts on a Thursday...and that day won&#39;t count toward a "weekend opening". Let&#39;s hope it can set a record for the "greatest opening day"!!!! P.S. TPM is so much more watchable than this damned "Brady Bunch Movie" that&#39;s on TV right now. Where in the hell is my remote?!

  • May 11, 2002, 6:16 p.m. CST

    Lucas won&#39;t be getting my money. I&#39;ll pay for Spiderman

    by Regis Travolta

    And you can take that to the bank Mr. Lucas.

  • May 11, 2002, 8:09 p.m. CST

    BLOODY HELL!

    by Dzobi-wan

    Remember the days when people would actually go and SEE a film before forming an opinion on it??? Now it&#39;s, "I&#39;ve just seen a pic from EPISODE III, and clearly this film will suck more than any other film in history." Give me a break.

  • May 11, 2002, 9:06 p.m. CST

    Yep...

    by obi-gabe

    And does anyone remember when opinions were neither right or wrong? "Hey, I liked TPM." "You fucking moron, that&#39;s wrong! It sucked!" I like to make up my opinions the old-fashioned way-- after watching the movie. And what the hell is up with the &#39;fuck&#39; guy? Can&#39;t he think of something else to say? Goddamn, talk about a stupid, geek fanboy fuck with nothing more intelligent to say than a four letter word? Besides, I think I got the point after the first or second &#39;fuck.&#39;

  • May 11, 2002, 9:16 p.m. CST

    INFORMED OPINIONS

    by Dzobi-wan

    ....can&#39;t wait to see the fanboy analysis of the MATRIX RELOADED trailer; I&#39;m guessing some of the following - "The CG looks SO CG," "This will crap all over AOTC (posted, of course, by someone who hasn&#39;t SEEN AOTC), and large amounts of disappointed outcry over Neo&#39;s organic webshooters. Sigh.

  • May 12, 2002, 2:34 a.m. CST

    Hey, Dzobi-wan. . .

    by Noriko Takaya

    . . .whaddya mean I have to see the film first before I can whine and bitch?! Why I just saw some concept art for SPIDER-MAN 2 scribbled on a napkin so I can already tell that flick is gonna blow goats!! I won&#39;t even bother to watch; I already know through my amazing powers of forsight that it will be bad. An&#39; I just heard from my brother&#39;s best friend&#39;s gardner who knows a pen pal from Guam that the title for EPISODE III is gonna be "THE SINISTER HAND OF DOOM." You heard it here first!! I won&#39;t even bother to watch it because I KNOW it&#39;ll sux!! Now watch me cuss: "fuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuck." Aren&#39;t I so very cutting edge?! Being a fangirl am kewl. ^_~ Toppu o Nerae!

  • May 12, 2002, 6:18 a.m. CST

    Noriko...

    by Intoxictd

    WOW!!! You already know all this. Damn, things are getting really fucked up in the Movies. Those are probably the most interesting comments I&#39;ve heard on this Talk Back thread. Episode III is gonna be called that. Wow, sounds like sombody pulled that right out of their ass. So how much crack did you smoke before you came up with that? Tell you what, why don&#39;t you smoke some more crack, come up with some more complete bullshit, blow some goats yourself, and fuck off!!! By the way, I&#39;m being really sincere with this post. So smile bitch! :P

  • May 12, 2002, 6:34 a.m. CST

    *duh* Recycled themes in a triology... how strange 8)...

    by Lindenius

    Well I thought that&#39;s kind of the point in triologies - to re-use themes of the other movies. Or... am I just hearing wrong in the OT??? No... she&#39;s probably right, I can not hear the Force theme in all thee movies... I&#39;m sorry for being so wrong... Oh, and The Two Towers will probably not have re-used music from Fellowship of the Ring, and Matrix 2 will not have anything from the the first movie.... Ohhhhhh.... and I forgot... James bond movies... how dare they use the same musical piece in every movie. Oh my god!!!

  • May 12, 2002, 11:47 a.m. CST

    If you are a Star Wars fan, you may well agree...

    by Silver_Joo

    The original trilogy, in whatever format was fantastic. But it was a visual experience, and as children, we would remember how much we liked the &#39;Falcon, not Luke&#39;s dilemma. However, the themes were easy to relate to, the action beautifully paced and the universes richi in diversity. The first prequel did not destroy any of this for me - in many ways, TPM was a pale imitation of ANH. The exposition in TPM was no worse than that of ANH, and the only problem this film had was expectation. No film can beat the hype, even LOTR suffered at its hands; TPM was no different. Alas, we cannot kid ourselves that previous Star Wars movies have been well written or all about character, in this respect they have always been poor. It should not be that fans are kidding themselves in this way - TPM contained dialogue and poor direction that Lucas has always offered his audiences. people like Kasdan and Brackett aided Lucas no end, he should have perhaps turned to someone other than Hayles this time also. Finally, regardless of how Episode 2 will play out for me and all of you Star Wars fans, it seems to have elements that gradually developed in ESB and ROTJ - complexity of plot, motives, emotional engagement, well paced action sequences. Of course Lucas is out of touch, of course his fan base grew up, but if we could just dump the prejudice, and watch the movie. Lucas is not the messiah, his direction is limp and lifeless - but this is Star Wars, and the imagination of this man far outweighs his dubious talents behind the camera.

  • May 12, 2002, 1:24 p.m. CST

    Praise to AICN for a Rare Unbiased Review

    by odietamo

    Overall this was a really good, and fair, review. Although I&#39;m still in the camp that firmly believes: "And when you have all the time, money, and power to make a film exactly how you want to

  • May 12, 2002, 1:25 p.m. CST

    Praise to AICN for a Rare Unbiased Review

    by odietamo

    Overall this was a really good, and fair, review. Although I&#39;m still in the camp that firmly believes: "And when you have all the time, money, and power to make a film exactly how you want to

  • May 12, 2002, 1:39 p.m. CST

    Why does Lucas work alone? Even Stanley Kubrick consulted w/ col

    by Ralph Cifaretto

    He must think he doesn&#39;t need any help. But with a film as powerful as "Phantom Menace" under his belt, who can argue with him.

  • May 12, 2002, 3:22 p.m. CST

    Alexandra&#39;s smelly gash is now open for business

    by jettison

    Quit bitching about slow scenes! What movie doesn&#39;t have down time? My advice to the crack whore who wrote this review - wipe the dried semen off your face, pick up the 50 cents your customer threw on the floor and go back and watch the original Star Wars. There is a LOT of down time in there. But no, that&#39;s not your point. You just want the opportunity to bitch about something, anything. News flash: as readers, we trust Harry&#39;s opinion, not yours. This site was built by his love and admiration for movies. You are just a freeloader, riding on Harry&#39;s hard work and dedication. You probably see this site as merely a vehicle to see if you can spread your opinion further than your legs. You probably couldn&#39;t give a crap about movies and film-making.

  • May 12, 2002, 3:51 p.m. CST

    Re Lucas working alone....

    by AbsOfJello

    The TPM DVD commentary does mention about how Ron Howard advised George to increase the tension in one of the pod race shots. Of course, Ron&#39;s real advice, "I think you should scrap this entire movie and start over," was never heard for fear of offending his good pal. Same goes for the army of 2000 yes-people whose names roll in the closing credits.

  • May 12, 2002, 3:54 p.m. CST

    WHAT IS WRONG WITH...

    by JEREWORK

    This broad must have just taken a college film class. I think this next sentence needs to be in all uppercase-ITS A FUCKING STAR WARS MOVIE. This is not Faulkner, or Updike, or even Heinlen. Go back and watch the first three movies. They are not perfect and the same complaints made about this film will apply. And please, Miss whatever your name is, leave the pretentious language and wordy, jabbering diatribes to 18th century naval officer.

  • May 12, 2002, 4:41 p.m. CST

    RE: AbsOFJello & Pod Race tension...

    by Ralph Cifaretto

    Why didn&#39;t Lucas make it so Ani KNEW his freedom depends on winning the race?! That would have increased tension, made Ani an active participant in the story, and let the FX serve something other than themselves. Lucas is bonehead.

  • I happen to be a female. And a movie fan. AND a Star Wars fan. I saw the first SW movie when I was 4 in the back of my uncle&#39;s convertible at a drive in theater. It was the coolest thing I&#39;d ever seen. I had toys and action figures, and not just of Leia. I still have the complete set of Burger King glasses from 1983 for Jedi. I still have my X-wing fighter toy, and my Millennium Falcon. I can remember running around the yard at my house with my friends "flying" the ships as we re-created the movie. Star Wars started my love of sci-fi and fantasy stories, just as the Spider-Woman and Superfriends cartoons got me into comic books and superheroes. I "get" Star Wars. Face it-- these movies, while technically brilliant, are not high art. They&#39;re spaghetti westerns, with clearly defined "good" and "bad" guys, but they happen to be set it space. But reading some of the replies here, I wonder if there isn&#39;t an innate threat if a woman has an opinion on these films. Just the condescending notion that she&#39;s trying to belittle the movie to be "cool". She&#39;s stating how she saw it. I thought Alexandra&#39;s article was well reasoned, well written and made her case. So WHAT if one of the women she quoted is a lesbian? So WHAT if Miss DuPont liked Pearl Harbor? Big deal. You want to know why more women don&#39;t get into sci-fi or Star Wars? It&#39;s the attitudes like some of the ones here, patronizing Alexandra for not agreeing with Harry and suggesting that she&#39;s not smart enough to "get" Star Wars because of a past review. That&#39;s just stupid, and ignorant. Maybe that elitism is why more women aren&#39;t into sci-fi. Look at the attitudes displayed by some of the people here-- THAT&#39;S why a lot of women don&#39;t get into this stuff. They have better things to do than be patronized by people for not being smart enough to "get" it, or to argue and nitpick with the Comic Book Guy archetype personified. Alexandra has an opinion, and a well written one. Her gender, and the sexual orientation of some of the people she quoted mean two things-- Jack and Sh*t. Get over it please, and take her review for what it is-- one person&#39;s take on the film. &#39;Nuff said.

  • May 12, 2002, 6:19 p.m. CST

    FEMALE TYPES

    by TomVee

    Harry: We need photos of all female reviewers. Preferably in thongs. Even if they are lesbos. Or ugly.

  • May 12, 2002, 7:02 p.m. CST

    It&#39;s still only a film.........

    by jimmyjazz1975

    Look, I can completely understand the connection that a lot of us have with these films. In fact, I even have a Rebel Alliance symbol tattoo on my shoulder...yes, they were thrilling, yes they have lived on for decades....but we all seem to be forgetting they are merely films...a director cannot be expected to repeat his triumphs every time, nor is he supposed tocater his films to your taste...simply enjoy the film, or hate the film, or whatever you like. Before you blast me, remember I am a Star Wars tattooed fan who will of course go opening night...and honestly, since the new trilogy is now almost over, if you hate them so much, don&#39;t go, and don&#39;t go to see the next one...They are merely films, and they can be easily avoided by simply not seeing them....

  • May 12, 2002, 7:47 p.m. CST

    wake up

    by TylersAndrew14

    This is just really funny. The star wars geeks are already desperately trying to defend this movie. Jesus christ! I mean its already been made painfully clear, AOTC is going to really suck. Not as bad as TPM but not much better. These movies have no heart and no soul (things spider -man has in spades). Any professional critic who has given this a positive review hasn&#39;t gone on to say it was a masterpiece, or even a really good movie, at best its been called okay. This movie will suck, please don&#39;t lie to yourselves. Its right there in front of us. Be brutally honest with yourselves and tell the truth, we can all feel it. Lucas is a hack, a failure, hell even the first three star wars movies weren&#39;t good. Its sad to see people who were once great like lucas fail but it happens and we must accept it. Also Dupont&#39;s review was very good, I don&#39;t see why you all call it bad, its well written and slightly honest, even though you can tell she really didn&#39;t like it as much as she says. I mean no one has given a good reason for why her review is bad. Another thing, I have now lost all respect for Harry Knowles, hes a liar and a horrible writer. This has become especially apparent after his AOTC review. He couldn&#39;t possibly have liked it as much as he says. Poor bastard. In fact if any of you reading this would like to be able to distinguish the good critics amongst the bad head over to Rotten tomatoes and look for the critics who claimed this movie was better than average. Finally I&#39;d like to say, movies are not JUST movies. Anyone who thinks this should take a look at the history of the arts and their impact on organized societys and the individuals who live within them. Movies are a refelction of us, and at the same time contribute to us. Thank you

  • May 12, 2002, 8:13 p.m. CST

    Shaggins ...you sourpuss!

    by hunglo

    spidey will rule your paranoid punk ass!!! get your head out lucas&#39;s ass. realize its just a movie and lucas aint no genius ya candyass punk bitch. IFFFF YA SMELLLLEELLLLLLLL....cough coughEEELLLLL.......ELLLLLLLLL.... what the ROCK....is...cookin.

  • May 12, 2002, 8:58 p.m. CST

    My review of AOTC

    by Mr Bonefish

    Just to let you know where I am coming from: First, I disliked TPM. It was boring as hell. AOTC kicks ass in all areas. I was fixated on the film the entire time and even had (WTF!) chills a few times. It is the real deal. Crappy dialogue? I expect that. C3P0 acting like a dork? No shit. I loved it. The CGI is the best I have ever seen. WOW. This viewing came from a crappy version via the newsgroups. I was still blown away. If only a digital theatre was in my area.

  • May 12, 2002, 8:59 p.m. CST

    Deadman your a jackass!!!

    by dogfish112

    Finchers movies are good but what kind of moron are you? Even if Fincher directed a star wars movie you&#39;d bitch that he was a sell-out. I&#39;m sick of comments like yours "This movie sucked but if (insert dark-angry new film-maker) directed it would kick ass!!!" so please just shut up.

  • May 12, 2002, 10:15 p.m. CST

    Silver_Joo - ANH Blows away TPM

    by Shakespeare

    Can&#39;t back you up Silver_Joo, I&#39;m a life long fan and I see a huge difference in quality, dialog, pacing, and just about everything else you can imagine when comparing ANH to TPM. I&#39;m not completely knocking TPM, just viewing it in the perspective of the first film. Episode 1 is three years old now, so the hype long since wore out. Other than a few bright spots, TPM doesn&#39;t hold up in quality. I agree that ANH had some corny lines and moments, but the percentage was miniscule when compared with TPM. Poop and Fart Jokes, Midiclorians, Jar-Jar. You are right, it is a pale attempt to ape ANH, very pale.

  • May 12, 2002, 10:21 p.m. CST

    Unbiased Collection of Reviews

    by Shakespeare

    I for one appeciate both this negative review and the other positive review&#39;s honesty and hope to see more of the same on this site. If you&#39;re really interested in an unbiased collection of the most current reviews, check out the link at the end of this post. Rotten Tomatoes is cataloging the good, the bad and the ugly (it was running about 60% positive / 40% negative last time I checked). NY Times, Ebert, Entertainment Weekly...its all there (except Harry of course...guess you have to see the final product to count :) Anyway, it&#39;s interesting reading: http://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/StarWarsEpisodeIIAttackoftheClones-1112314/reviews.php?critic=all

  • May 13, 2002, 12:27 a.m. CST

    *WAAAAAHHHHH!!*

    by Noriko Takaya

    Intoxictd, I&#39;m tellin&#39; mom!! 0.o

  • May 13, 2002, 1:07 a.m. CST

    AOTC Review

    by bionicpup

    Well, I am weak. I recently viewed a pirated copy of ATOC clones, though I will still pay my dues as I have already purchased advanced tickets next Wednesday. With that said, here&#39;s my short review, for whatever it&#39;s worth. First off, the movie is (and it pains me to say this) quite boring. Perhaps this is a product of indulging myself with every movie spoiler on the web since the buzz started, or perhaps it is because its true. I watched it twice, and found myself yawning the second time around...this mirrored my reaction to watching the Episode I DVD...yeah sure there&#39;s action, but there&#39;s also a whole lot of nothing going on, too. For some reason I still can&#39;t understand why someone would care to go through all this trouble to kill Padme&#39;, it seems ridiculous to me so I try to not think about it. The film is long winded, we spend most of our time watching people go places, aside from the splendor of ILM&#39;s magic in creating these vast new worlds, the excitement falls short. Lucas&#39;s writing style also tangles him in this film: The dialogue is written like a novel, so naturally the actors stumble when they deliver it. It doesn&#39;t flow as it should, instead everyone in the film speaks formally and after a while it alienates you from the characters. The film certainly has its moments, but it takes so long to get to them! By the time we arrive at an action sequence, we are so drained from the journey that we lose touch with it. Hayden&#39;s portrayal of the young Darth Vader was effective in many places where the script did not inhibit him...his anger and passion is great but in some scenes it just doesn&#39;t work out. There are good things about this film, the visual spectacle is superb, but even with these fantastical settings something doesn&#39;t feel quite right: the actors aren&#39;t really there and somehow through them we know it. Also, did the lightsaber duels suffer without the aid of martial arts expert Ray Park? The lightsaber duels in AOTC were a bore in comparison to TPM, they were shorter and less spontaneous. Anakin needed a lot more than just 2 lightsabers to prove to the audience that he was a great Jedi...he lost the second saber in what seemed liked four frames anyway, so what was the point? Christopher Lee was great as the mysterious Count Dooku, but the problem with his character was his mysteriousness. Suddenly Obi-Wan and Anakin are dueling this Dark Sith and we hardly know his name. There was no passion in that duel, there was no real substance. I enjoyed this film upon first viewing, but there is no repeat value here. If I don&#39;t care to watch a movie a second time, then someone didn&#39;t do their job. AOTC demands patience, but the investment is exhausting and unrewarding. The only things I truly enjoyed about this movie were parts that held no weight to the story. I enjoyed the thrill of the Coruscant chase, I enjoyed the excitement of the final battle, but I did not feel passionately about the story that linked them together. Lucas has somehow forgotten that the story creates the movie, not the visual effects...he was right when he said he created silent movies. That&#39;s exactly what AOTC is, and little more. **1/2

  • May 13, 2002, 1:33 a.m. CST

    ALEXANDRA ...You go girl!!!!

    by hunglo

    jsut keep writing those revies cause unlike some of these lucas zombies I can tell that was a good honest unbiased review and these over sensitive jerk offs can&#39;t semm to stand someone with fair criticisms of any thing that OBI wAN JACK ASS.. lucas puts out. So to make up for lack of a penis they have to throw around insults instead of blaming genetics and a lack of something betterto do with their time. see not funny when someone does it to you losers. &#39;this movie is not real!" " ..come here sparky, no movies&#39; for real" --robin williams

  • May 13, 2002, 2:59 a.m. CST

    Female Critics

    by GEORGEFNLUCAS

    You&#39;re right, sister, I should burn my tickets, and my bra while I&#39;m at it. No offense, but these movies are really targeted at a young male audience. Things you&#39;re bored by, my son will love. This movie&#39;s tone is different from the first three? Are you serious? SO WHAT? Maybe George Lucas wants to tell a DIFFERENT STORY, lady! God, you dork men and women out there are like all of the sheep moviegoers you think you&#39;re above. Only your hot-buttons are subtle and secretive rather than blatant. Maybe there is a different message for these three films, the &#39;dark portion&#39; of the UNFINISHED story is different from the triumphant &#39;light portion&#39; of the story we&#39;ve already seen? But no, you people want a frigging &#39;juke-box&#39; director. Someone who keeps replaying the hits over and over and over again. And when they begin to get stale, you whine even louder about how so and so has lost it because they repeat themselves. Have any of you seen &#39;More American Graffitti&#39;? Ever heard of it? Yeah, now that was Lucas listening to studios, audiences, etc. And it sucked out loud in church. Why do I even read these reviews anyway? Plafsky

  • May 13, 2002, 8:03 a.m. CST

    Ok here we have a movie targeted for 5 to 8 year olds (not to me

    by Blake Falls

    Let

  • May 13, 2002, 10:41 a.m. CST

    My verdict...

    by Jar Jar Boinks

    Everything was in balance -- two great SW films (the first two), followed by two completely utterly shit ones. Then our boy Harry got a sneak preview of Episode 2 ... jizzed all over it, in fact, heightening my anticipation that Lucas may have found The Force again. Well, I saw AOTC. My verdist: It completely blows chunks. The scale is now slipped right into the negative. Where to start...? The romance at the center of the film. Absolutely trite garbage. The acting was turgid. The dialogue was pathetic. There was some winsome moments near the end that were great, but nowehere near makes up for the lousy first two hours. Enough. I&#39;ll watch Episode 3, but following a three-film losing sequence, never again will I hold out hope for Lucas toy-making franchise. He&#39;s lost it completely.

  • May 13, 2002, 10:42 a.m. CST

    Discussions - (Bouncy Knowles you are a tit mouse)

    by Moolafoo

    Well passions have been stirred on this topic haven&#39;t they? I have read long endless rants, which show the enthusiasm for and against the films. I think we can agree on a couple of things 1.)

  • May 13, 2002, 10:56 a.m. CST

    What movie did Harry get a sneak of...?

    by Yojimbo Jones

    What version did Harry get to see? Cuz that&#39;s the version I want to see. The one they&#39;re showing at the theater preview was a crashing disappointment. The best that can be said of it, is that it is *marginally* better than TPM. That&#39;s kinda like saying a golden shower is preferrable to eating shit. Both suck.

  • May 13, 2002, 12:25 p.m. CST

    A few thoughts...

    by Intoxictd

    If Star Wars is such a horrible series of movies, why is it so huge throughout the world? Why are movie theaters selling out of tickets weeks in advance of the opening?------------------------------------------Why do people have problems with Lucas being someone with no talent or writing skills? He makes a god-damned shit load of money. Am I hearing that these people wouldn&#39;t ever want to be that lucky?--------------------------------Do people completely miss the great marketing idea behind making a movie for 5 - 8 year olds? Rarely, can you get parents out of the house to see a movie that they want to see, because they have a responsiblity to their children. But now we have....."Mommy, Daddy....can we see Star Wars....can we see Star Wars.....can we see Star Wars? Wow! Now we have only one person who really wants to see this movie, but we have THREE (or more) ticket buyers. BRILLIANT!!!-----------------------------------------I&#39;m a Star Wars fan. I&#39;m 25 I have a lot of the toys, most of the computer games, a bunch of novels. I watch the movies whenever I can. I also have a life. I have a good job as a graphic designer. An established "partying/drinking" talent, too many friends. Get laid on a regular basis. Is there something wrong with me?-----------------------------------------I hated "The Phantom Menace". Have it on DVD. As a matter of fact, it&#39;s the least watched of all my 35 DVD&#39;s. My collection includes titles (thanks to my girl friend) like: NSYNC Live from Madison Square Garden, Bring It On, Both Mummies, and Cruel Intention. When I put TPM in, I select the "Duel of the Fates" chapter, and watch only the lightsaber battle ( i skip the Gungan vs. TFederation battle, and Anikan in the fighter). I will still go to see AOTC and EpIII with good faith. I will also buy everything on DVD, can&#39;t wait. Lucas can have my money any day, because he (and everyone else involved) have earned it.---------------------------------------------LucasFilm should have dumped this whole "pequel trilogy" idea, and brought Timothy Zahn&#39;s "Heir to the Empire" Trilogy to the bigscreen.

  • May 15, 2002, 1:17 a.m. CST

    hARRY IS A DISGUSTING FAT BODY

    by SPACEKILLER-3D

    i DIDN&#39;T KNOW THEY STACKED SHIT THAT HIGH.

  • Nov. 11, 2002, 6:50 a.m. CST

    I won't get this DVD.

    by KONG33

    I wish there were deleted scenes incorporated, it desparately needed a sense of originality, the deep parts are skipped over and the simple, dull parts are expanded upon. Imitating old films will never work, because they at least infused ONE ORIGINAL ELEMENT in their films, and Lucas has not. My mind sleepwalks through unoriginal scenes and thus, movies like SW and Spider-Man come across as being a lot more dull, dry and fast at the same time. I found ATTACK OF THE CLONES irritating to watch. It could have been a lot better if it had been entirely silent, excepting SFX. Overall, SW is just outdated, bringing down our expectations in entertainment and needs to be retired in 2005.

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