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COLLATERAL DAMAGE review
This Review Is Dedicated to A.B. King!
Last night with great trepidation, I stumbled my way into COLLATERAL DAMAGE starring Arnold Schwarzenegger, a one time asskicker of the silver screen. He’s become something of a joke due to a series of poor decisions in terms of the films he’s chosen to make.
To give you an example of how far his stock has fallen, last night I had 4 passes good for 8 people to attend the early press screening of his latest. I was able to get Quint and Auntie Meat to come. Patch, a rabid action film fan, decided to catch up on some school work… She decided to spend her time doing school work rather than see a free Arnold Schwarzenegger film. In all two seats couldn’t be filled, and another two seats were reluctantly filled by a friend of mine and his wife, both of whom I hadn’t seen a movie with since the midnight screening of THE PHANTOM MENACE.
This was a serious issue.
They had anticipated overflowing crowds, they had scheduled two screens, but one would have been enough. There was zero anticipation. Before the film, the audience could be heard lampooning Arnold with his one liners, "Stick…. Aworond!" "You Lawk Dead Tired" and on and on and on.
If you could hear me before the film, sort of whispering to myself, I was saying, "Don’t Suck!" You see, I am an Arnold Schwarzenegger fan. I love that series of action actors that came about in the late seventies/early eighties. Stallone, Arnold, Ford, Russell. They’re like the patron saints of the action genre, and they suck way too often these days. Admitting that sucks too. Watching Ford bored beyond words during the Golden Globes the other day, was just agony. Kurt Russell has smartly begun doing character work to bide his time finding a good starring vehicle. Harrison Ford just doesn’t do much anymore. Arnold acts for whoever can afford him and Sly… Sly has no ability to discern a good script whatsoever. His agent must play with Lincoln Logs still.
There’s good material out there. Hell Arnold is still attached to 4 really great scripts, but instead he goes for the pay day. God willing, maybe the pay day might possibly be good, but really… it seems that more often than not… the script always comes up lacking.
I did not like the script to COLLATERAL DAMAGE, it just didn’t do anything for me. It felt lifeless, but I was hoping that Andrew Davis would come into the project as the director of THE FUGITIVE not as the director of CHAIN REACTION. I was hoping that he might be able to somehow pull it off.
When the film was delayed due to September 11th, I was afraid they might be softening the film, but secretly I was wanting them to amp it up a notch or two, truth be told, there were no reshoots that I heard of. No extra footage. They moved it because the film dealt with a fireman exacting revenge upon terrorists that killed his wife and son.
As the lights dimmed and the movie began, I was just hoping for something fun. Something that would make me smile and flinch a few times. Make me say, "Oh shit," a few times… ya know?
COLLATERAL DAMAGE was fun. It was fun without feeling sacrilegious. The first 30 minutes seem a little too… creepy weird. Arnold taking a shower with his tiny son was a bit, weird. The blast that kills his wife and son wasn’t over-fetishized and felt brutal without calling attention to itself. But the moment in the film where Arnold hears, "The bomb was apparently placed inside a Traffic Cops motorcycle" the film begins. Arnie’s eyes narrow. The other gigantic firemen in the room all look like they are saying, "Let’s kick some ass!" or "We’ve got your back Sparky!" but they don’t say that! Which is good. Because that’s really bad dialogue.
The great success of COLLATERAL DAMAGE is the casting of the film.
Like I mentioned with Arnie’s fellow Firemen, these guys look right. They look like firemen that would be in Arnold’s brigade of firemen. These don’t look like the pussies in Chris Klein’s ROLLERBALL, these look like real men. The type of men that will walk through fire and rip out the windpipe of the mutherfucker that started the damn thing. Now, I have never seen a single one of these guys, and they don’t really do anything, but you know that if this movie wanted to be Johnny To’s LIFELINE and headed into that direction, you’d love to see them kick fire’s ass with Arnie. BUT that’s not this movie.
Then you have the CIA/FBI guys. Casting Elias Koteas as the obsessed badass CIA guy, who may be just a bit too committed to wiping out terrorism… Well, ever since Casey Jones, Elias Koteas has done it for me. He just looks a bit like the maskless Dr Phibes and he seems moments away from licking a wet scab wound at all times. It isn’t that he’s great here, he just brings more to his role. He’s good. He doesn’t look like a cardboard cut out, he looks right. Acts right. He isn’t overacting, he’s just… creepy and off, and that is what I want from him here. All the other CIA/FBI guys are faces you recognize in a strange sort of "where do I know that guy from" sort of way… Just like when you see FBI or CIA guys on TV at press conferences they always kinda look familiar in that… "Hey has that guy been tailing me" kinda way.
Then you have EL LOBO the terrorist. Beside the terrorist being named after my brother-in-law, the father of Kublakhan and the husband of Sister Satan, casting Pablo Escobar as the terrorist was great. Never mind the fact that Cliff Curtis is actually a Kiwi Maori guy and that he battled Bruce Campbell as the evil but handsome Prince Khalid in THE MAJESTIC! Here he is EL LOBO, and EL LOBO is a wonderful evil terrorist badass with emotion. He isn’t some cartoon character. He doesn’t go around doing THE EVIL LAUGH! Cliff is a good actor. He’s been in THE PIANO, ONCE WERE WARRIORS, THREE KINGS, BRINGING OUT THE DEAD, THE INSIDER, BLOW and TRAINING DAY. He’s been good in all of those, and he brings an understated menace to the role that keeps him from being ludicrous in that BAD ARNIE VILLAIN manner.
Then you have the damsel in distress, Francesca Neri. I kept expecting Arnold to say, "I must confess to you, I’m giving very serious thought… to eating your wife." That’s right, the lovely Allegra Pazzi… An Italian goddess sprung from the lovely loins of Rosalba Neri… one of the most beautiful Italian B actresses in history. I’m a huge Rosalba Neri fan, I can’t recommend enough the joy of watching Francesca’s mother in ARIZONA COLT, LONG RIDE FROM HELL, HERCULES IN THE HAUNTED WORLD, THE TORTURE CHAMBER OF FU MANCHU and LADY FRANKENSTEIN. Francesca is only two films into her American film career, and this is the first one shot outside of Italy. Those eyes of hers are echoes of her mothers and wowzers she floats the boat. Possibly the best eye candy to be opposite Arnold ever.
All of these characters are enough to consider that this movie was exceeding expectations. However, the second that John Turturro steps on screen playing a riff on his Bernie Bernbaum in a Columbian prison… HEAVEN! Right here in the middle of an Schwarzenegger flick I taste a morsel of a Coen Brother film. Add to that the fact that Turturro seems to be improving the most delightful little riffs on his dialogue. Raising his material way way way up there. I know this character was dead on paper, but here… Turturro infuses it with that life that only a great actor can give a meaningless part. Casting Turturro in this tiny part added an entire star to this film. He is the champagne added to these scrambled eggs… making them just dissolve in your mouth the way only great scrambled eggs taste.
Then we’re introduced to a character played by John Leguizamo. AGAIN a role cast with someone far exceeding the necessity for casting someone of his ability. John is riffing on Arnold as if saying, "All my life I’ve wanted to be in an Arnold movie and call this big lummox a sauerkraut and here’s my chance and I’m gonna do it!" Leguizamo is merciless in roasting Arnold’s character, his accent and Arnie just simmers there taking it. FANTASTIC! I was delighted beyond words to see these pair of Johns roasting the Oak.
The great thing about both these cameo characters is that they are just the right amount of both. Not too much to overpower the films like Joe Pesci in the last LETHAL WEAPON flick. But just enough to flavor the whole film.
Then there is Arnold Schwarzenegger. It is very interesting how Andrew Davis uses him here. They’ve eliminated a great deal of his character’s dialogue. Given other character’s off-screen narration to scenes of Arnie doing things. He is never used as a monster of death. Davis uses Arnold’s reputation and his previous characters as a cocked left jab, what I mean is… as an audience member, you are sitting there looking at Conan, The Terminator, Col. John Matrix, Douglas Quaid, Harry Tasker, Major Dutch Schaefer and you know that at any moment he is going to whip out a 16" knife, hurl it across the room lifting the victim off his feet pinning him to the wall 3 feet behind him with the sound of a chicken leg being popped off the chicken. Followed by, "STICK AROUND!"
Arnold is used like Hitchcock’s MacGuffin. You know he’s going to explode. You know that EL LOBO killing his kid and wife was a "BEEEEEEG MISTAAAAAKE!" but Arnie never tells us that. We know it.
There is really only one real ONE LINER in the film, and it feels so good when he says it. Arnie’s fights in this thing are brutal. The one in the hut against three Colombian guerillas was classic down and dirty style fighting. Enough fucking wire-fu, let’s use our teeth. Let’s bludgeon someone to death, choke them to death… But ya know what… Arnie is really a very ineffective killer in this flick. People just don’t die easy with him. He’s not a killer here. It isn’t what his character does. He is ‘THE FIREMAN’, technically his character is called Gordon Brewer, but nearly every other character in the film refers to him as ‘THE FIREMAN’ and that is very integral to his character. He wants revenge on one person in particular. He doesn’t want lots of death. This is a new drive for him, all he has known has been saving lives, not extinguishing them. As a result… there is a wonderful clumsiness to his character. A hesitation that he has never really had before.
His ‘superhuman’ status comes only from the amount of personal abuse he can withstand. I’m sure that the average human would take 2 full blows from a rifle butt before letting someone go. Arnie takes maybe 20 of those, and innumerable kicks. There is just no quit in the sonuvabitch. He’s just as determined as he’s ever been, but less deadly.
Everything in Colombia just did it for me. Technically it was all shot on the east coast of Mexico, I know the area quite well, where this was all shot, but I love how all the establishing of the area is done. I like how big the film feels down there. I was reminded of the first ROMANCING THE STONE film. That sort of unveiling of the locale. Really sweet. Really good.
This is the first movie that Andrew Davis has made since the FUGITIVE that I really had a lot of fun with. It isn’t THE FUGITIVE good, but not much is. This is a good Arnold flick. One that actually got audience applause afterwards.
Now, if that big bastard can be in another great TERMINATOR movie, followed by getting CRUSADE off the fucking ground, we might see the bastard doing good again!
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+ Expand All
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I'm *very* reticent to buy into this.... I just haven't trusted him since 'Last Action Hero'.... // e.
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Kindergarten Cop was Arnold's finest hour.
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and frankly, it's probably your own damn fault if you end up not liking the finished product. Personally, this is probably the first time I've been excited for an Arnie movie since T2, and that's saying a lot. I will be there this weekend.
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Sounds like a good movie. Looking forward to it.
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The man has made the best Segal (UNDER SEIGE) and Chuck Norris films (CODE OF SILENCE). Now all he has to do is rescue Stallone's career.
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I caught a screening of this last night and it may be Arnold's worst movie. It is more than laughably bad. It works really well as a comedy, but it takes itself very seriously. He is terrible, as usual lately. When he tries to get emotional in the beginning it is hysterical. He is not believable for one second. And we're supposed to believe that this guy with no training or experience could go into war-torn Colombia and survive. It is such a joke. There's also some really weak CGI (waterfall scene) and the typical action scenes where Arnie can't get hurt and dodges explosions and bombs. I liked the end where two characters were in the middle of a huge explosion and ended up completely fine and unburned, just so Arnie could go one on one. Harry must have seen a different print than I did. This will easily contend for the year's worst movie. Stay far away.
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I've been looking forward to seeing this film.
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Count me in for going to see Collateral Damage this weekend. I'm going with the girlfriend and her parents.
Time to get pumped up! I've heard more positive news than negative regarding this film. CD is going to rock the box office on the Feb. 8th weekend. -
I saw Collateral Damage a few months ago on the Warner Lot shortly after 9/11 and enjoyed every minute of it. Nothing groundbreaking in terms of Arnold movies but nowhere near the horror of his recent efforts.
It seems nowadays he's either trying to change his image (End of Days) or embrace it (T3) and Collateral Damage somehow manages to accomplish both. For once, he comes off convincingly as something other then a terminator yet still manages to kick ass. It's still not as good as anything in his heyday, but it's the closing thing there has been since True Lies.
But the bottom line is this--if you've decided beforehand that Arnold is dead then this won't bring him back for you. But if you have a glimmer of hope for him, you might just have a good time here. Hope you enjoy. -
The buzz seems quite positive around this. Its nice to see arnold back in a a traditional action movie again. I'll definately be giving it a look.
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Feb 05, 2002 6:53:59 PM CST
It woulda been nice to see Doc Savage, but I believe Arnold is t
by rap12
...and this is the project I really did want to see. Other than Conan, of course, but he isn't too old for that just yet. I think Doc might be a lost dream by this point. Too bad.
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I have been very wary of this since I heard about this. THe wehole concept of casting Arnold as a "regular guy", even a fireman, just seems wrong. I was however planning on watching this anyway just for John Leguizamo. I have been a huge fan of his since Spawn. Now there's more to look forward to in this movie.
I want T3 to be great, although all reports of the True Lies 2 plot seem terrible and nonsensical. -
Arnie, gotta love him.
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Feb 05, 2002 7:37:10 PM CST
Jesus, Harry, you make it sound like the Terminator films were B
by hammer2fall
I mean, seriously man..."If only Arnold could make a great Terminator film..." Wake up, pig-boy; both Terminator movies WERE great!
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Feb 05, 2002 7:49:33 PM CST
Uuuuuuummmmm, no, not even on cable at four in the morning tryin
by superhero
Arnold's done! Hope this bombs. Completely making Columbians out to be terrorists and villains when we know it's this country's tired assed drug policy that's enabling them. Not to mention the stupidity of the premise. With all that's going on in the world we're supposed to believe that regular schmoe guy (Which Arnold is not but keeps trying to convince audiences he is.)can find the terrorists in a South American jungle when the CIA and American troops cannot? Talk about ridiculous garbage... When are they going to start realising that suspension of disbelief only goes so far...?
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I have been looking forward to a new Arnie flick. Yay!
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I like films that do their job. Some films are supposed to make you think, make you laugh, cry, scare the living bajeezus out of you and so on. You all know that so I
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Feb 05, 2002 9:16:57 PM CST
Boys have a penis and girls have a vagina! (message to Star Wars
by bigtuna
DID YOU KNOW THAT SMARTASS TALKBACKERS!!!
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Uh, ok. Thank you BigTuna for sharing your recent discovery with the rest of us talkbackers
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i know it might sound sacriligious, but i was reading Frank Millers Sin City, the first one, a few days back, and thought Arnold might be ok as Marvin. you'd have to scruff the hell out of him, not just a light beard like End of Days, but maybe. i think watching the sixth day awhile back, when arnie was running people over in his car and laughing maniacally while driving down some stairs, i thought of it then to. i'm sure it would probably be super cleaned up, and have a positive spin, and everything, but in a perfect world, to have the Commando/Predator Arnie back in the role in Millers universe, well, it could rock. just thought i'd share this insane epiphany. a'ight, peace out.
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Holy Shit! I forgot that film was made! Ah! This Must be the Shitt Arnold Everybody is talking about! It is all clear to me now! Peace!
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Yo Big Red, what's with saying the scene where Arnold takes a shower with his son, is creepy? That's what all fathers do with their children foo'. Unless you were harboring some sick ass thoughts, why would you think that was creepy? Which gets me to my next point. Could it be Harry, that the reason your homeboys didn't want to kick it with you to watch the movie was that they didn't want to be seen with a big fat guy with a red afro in a Hawaiian shirt in public? I'm sure your friends are no picnic either when it comes to the normal meter, but they must seem that way compared to yo biggy Red.
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I woul like if just once hollywood directors would come down to Colombia to look at it before they make a picture of it. Nothing in Colombia looks like rural mexican towns. The only thing I like is the use of Renault cars, there
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Feb 05, 2002 11:04:45 PM CST
Harry I'm sure when you were a widdle widdle boy Father Geek
by regis travolta
Then you have EL LOBO the terrorist. Beside the terrorist being named after my brother-in-law, the father of Kublakhan and the husband of Sister Satan, given the Knowles family one never knows. Seriously Harry there's nothing "weird" about a parent showering with their child. Some day even you will be a daddy then you'll understand. As for Ahnuld, he vill vip you into shape!
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I went to the premiere last night and it was horrible. It tries to play all ends toward the middle - America is culpable, but terrorists are really bad - and hey, now watch some cool explosions! No characters, gobbledygook plot and yes, after 9/11 it's aggressively stupid. Be an apologist all you like, Harry, but this one was 100% without merit. Having said that, we were in the balcony w/ all the radio show winners and some of them were cheering like it was 1985. So maybe they'll take it to a strong opening weekend, but I look forward to it dying a quick and painful death. Sample conversation overheard at the reception: "So, what did you think of the movie?" "That question isn't even funny."
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I love Arnold. I have always loved the big oak. I think all true Arnold fans are looking foward to this movie. How can you not be? Its the new Schwarzanegger! I'll tell ya, I for one enjoyed the heck out of END OF DAYS. I thought it was a fun movie with Gabryiel Byrne playing an awesome Satan. Arnold was cool as the "man who finds God to defeat Satan," and the last thirty minutes were great. I found THE 6TH DAY to be fun and humorous but the villains were a little cheesy for me. I expected the film to be a little darker. From what I hear, COLLATERAL DAMAGE will be more mature and it has my $7 over that sucky looking Kevin Klein crap.
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The movie was really fun and really stupid. I saw it at a free screening across the street from USC, and the crowd was 100% pro-Arnold. He got tons of applause every time he appeared or spoke. The big man was supposed to do a Q and A live VIA sattelite, but there were "technical difficulties," so that was cancelled. Whatever. It was a good time at the movies.
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Harry, as delightfully snippy as you are, I have to throw you into the roasting pit with the other male pigs for your eye-ball rolling salute to men who look like they can rip the windpipes out of people. Take a cue from the sensative menance of Cliff Curtis: brawn is bunk.
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I'm sorry, but he's never going to make a good movie again... except maybe King Conan if done right. Maybe it's time to move onto politics, Arnie?
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Gotta love Harry waxing poetic about a Ah-nald film. I mean seriously! Anyway good review Harry. However, I am not sure if I can trust you just yet! After so many turkeys the idea of a good Arnold film (not even going to attempt his last name you realize) seems more insane than Cyborgs from the future. However, Andrew Davis did direct it and he did kick ass with the Fugitive. However, his films since than have been fairly weak. Especially that Keanu Reeves one. Whatever the hell it was called. Anyone remember that one? Anyway I'll check rottentomatoes this weekend and see how the film does. Right now there are 3 reviews. Two of them positive. With this it makes my hope a little brighter. However, considering Ah-nold its gonna take alot more before it gets bright enough to see in here.
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I usually don't go for mindless action flicks...I hated both Mummy movies...but I have to admit, I really enjoyed "The 6th Day". Is something wrong with me?
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So, is this one as good as Armageddon Harry?
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Just a note as long as someone mentioned Last Action Hero... That
movie was NOT an action film it was a Parody (say it with me). he
even said so on Letterman the night before it came out, that they were
poking fun at real action flicks with that one. The only problem was,
every movie reviewer in town reviewed it like it was a serious action
flick and panned it. Shows you how brain dead a lot of critics can
be.
Anyway, had to get that off my chest. As an action flick yes it
stank, but as the parody it was it was pretty funny.
-Dr S. -
Arnold needs to get off his ass. He needs to focus on King Conan. He will forever be Conan in my eyes. Terminator had a great sequel, it doesn't need another. Conan the Destoyer was the worst. It's time for his rich ass to make a real sequel to Conan. He shouldn't be wasting his time on true lies 2. I'm praying to crom that King Conan will happen. To hell with Arnold if it doesn't.
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...about how the Colombian situation is handled in the film... the only reason I would even think of it is because there is a positive quote from Andrew Davis on the tape of a documentary about the Zapatistas... it may have been "A Place Called Chiapas" but I'm not sure. Then I read an interview with Davis at dark horizons where he says he travelled in Colombia and fell in love with the country, and thought it would be interesting to have the film set there because Americans don't know what is going on there. Huh? Does Davis want to educate Americans about the situation in Colombia through an Arnie movie? I really don't want to see this movie, but I am a little curious. If Davis is sympathetic to the Zapatistas his take on Colombia has a slight chance of not being completely shallow.
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Feb 06, 2002 4:00:11 AM CST
'so you cooked up a story and dropped us all into a meat gri
by bluelou_boyle
AWESOME !!! It's good to see Arn back on top where he belongs.
For all the visitors of thearnoldfan.com, you might like to read this:
from e! online
We always planned after the second one that there would be a third. What you don't plan is how difficult it is sometimes to put it together. Different people have ownership, and they fight. This causes a lot of wasted time. But now we have it under one roof and a firm April 15 start date.
So, the delay wasn't about finding someone to cough up that $30 million paycheck you're getting?
By the time my wife gets through with it...trust me. Let's talk after the fact.
The Terminator always enters the movies naked. Since it has been about a dozen years between movies, are you concerned about continuity?
I weigh exactly the same, 220 pounds. I ride my motorcycle with the same Terminator jacket I wore in the first movie and the second one. So, the day I shoot that scene in Terminator 3, I will try to be as close to the shape I was in for the other movies. I don't want people to say, "Wait a minute...oh, it's 12 years later, he's not as fit now." Having a nude scene in a movie must be powerful motivation to work out. When I started working out, I wanted to become a champion. But then when you're working out, you feel so good you get addicted to that high of feeling strong and the psychology of what that does to your mind. You come to realize that's why you work out.
It's not just to meet girls?
That, too. But you work out because you like that feeling of feeling good, feeling fit. And when you hit your stomach [he punches his belly], it's hard. Rather than going through the normal stages you see in medical books: here's the young kid, here's 30, here's 40 and now begins the slouching, the deteriorating, the disappearing. I don't want that. I want to be able to ski like I did when I was 20.
But at some point, doesn't gravity set in?
I don't want to let go, but eventually you have to. When you're 80, you're not going to look the same as you did when you were 40; you're not going to be able to do stunts. The time will come when I have to let go, but I want to draw it out. I don't want to succumb to this mindset of, I'm 50 now, so I can't expect the same things.'
and the arnoldfan's message board isn't working !!! Fix it guys !!!
bluelou_boyle (aka Blaine)
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Sorry, but I've been laughing at that J&SBSB line for far too long.
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btw it was cool of harry to mention johnnie To's LIFELINE. that was a great fireman movie.
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I'm sorry, but there's not one review out there that will make me believe this movie is worth me throwing away 2 hours of my life.
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But I wouldn't know. Because I'm a real pussy.
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It makes me so sad that the people on this site endorse such vile sludge. Mr. Schwarzenegger's films promote violence, lawlessness and amorality. Why is the solution to his character's problem to kill those responsible? Does that solve anything? NO. This is why I propose the assemblage of a church-sponsored coalition to screen all films before they are released and make the necessary cuts. And if you people disagree, well, that's a shame, because you're only hurting yourselves. Just remember, God answers knee-mail!
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She loves God- get her!
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...can't wait for the church to get all up in my movie-going shit. Oh, wait. What I meant was I'd have to "kill myself" if the church got all up in my movie-going shit. Why not, if I'm going to hell anyhow?
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My day at work just got so much better. Please don't ban her again, she just makes me laugh too hard.... She also kinda turns me on... In that wanna bend her over and invade her "Forbidden Love Tunnel" and make her moan "Oh GOD!" kinda way...
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First, let me get to know you.
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MMMMMM.....sacri-tastic!
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Check out eonline.com for their Q&A session with Arn! CD is definitely going to crush the competition at the box office for a few weeks. E! also talks about how Arnie is pumping up for T3 - to be in as good as shape as he was for T2/T1. Enjoy!
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Best... Troll... Ever.
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Can you post on the arnoldfan message board ?!!! It's not working...
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You people can call me a troll, or goblin or make your rude remarks. It doesn't change the fact that you know that I'm right. All of you are screaming for your movies to be regulated, you just don't know it. How many times on this site have people said "That movie S**ked!" or "George Lucas r***d my childhood!"? Plenty of times, believe you me! Well, if we had an organization funded by our tax dollars and presided over by church and government officials, you'd have nothing to complain about! Don't you see? By railing against these films and taking no action, it becomes YOUR FAULT that they are no good. You have to see, people, that I'm on your side. I want quality entertainment, same as anyone. But if you people think that pornography like "Moulin Rouge" is entertainment, then you've been mislead. All I ask is that we have another set of eyes give a quick look at the movies before we do, OK? What's the harm in that?
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Mason if you want to live in a bland fascist world then feel free to regulate your own viewing, I wouldn't bother trying to convince us, it won't work.
As if a tax-funded, centrally organised institution could decide the quality of films.
But you manage to crack everyone up so keep posting.
Out of curiosity, which films do consider OK ? -
I meant what films do YOU consider OK Mason ?!!!
I need someone to regulate my spelling... -
I am a fan of the absurd, so that is why I am looking forward to this Schwarzenegger film. I am also enticed by the fact that the Oak will not be using a gun, he will be basically be beating people to death with his hands. At first I didn't like that notion, because I want a resurgance in film violence, disturbing film violence. Even as I type this, I am enjoying a viewing of another absurd classic, Commando. To me, Collateral Damage is the indirect sequel or revisioning of Commando, and that notion in and of itself is reason enough to pay my $7.50 right smack on the barrelhead. Oh, and as for "fun" folks like Linda Mason...I would love to direct a film where Christian Fundamentalists/Jesus Freaks/Moral Nazis were the enemy (completely plausible) and our hero would stalk each one of the Jesus Freaks down and either beat them to death with a rock (stoning), crushing their skulls and playing with their brain matter, or simply stabbing them to death with his only weapon, a sharpened titanium crucifix (Thank you so much, OZ.) That would be a return to the action genre, and that ladies and fanboys would put your LOTR/SW loving asses right in the seats!
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It's about time Commando was re-imagined...lets hope for a not-so-subtle reference to boy (girl?!!)george and mucho physical violence.
Good to know Arn is getting back to basics. Anyone here know marketing ?!!! Ah-nuld has obviously done a S.W.O.T. analysis on his career...keep it pumping Arn !!! -
But one of you asked me what films I considered good. Basically, anything that promotes a positive message with no violence, promiscuity or controversial topics. (If you want a list, I can provide one). Of course, there aren't many of those in existence these days. Almost every film currently in theaters promotes godlessness, disrespect for authority, the advocation of an ungoverned society and homosexuality being treated as a normal lifestyle. Now, should these movies be made? Of course not. But, I recognize that we live in a free country, so go ahead. Make your movies with your whoremongers and sinners. All I ask is that good Chrisitan people be allowed to screen them before the children do. That way they can take out anything that's offensive before we more bloodshed. That, to me, is the DEFINITION of freedom.
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I though the 6th Day was a very funny and entertaining action film. The 'then God shouldnt have killed my dog' line and 'no, so you can go fuck urself' were the best one-liners ive heard in an arnie movie for some time
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...but it sounds cool. And Harry, you have COMPLETELY misunderstood what a "McGuffin" is.
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Nothing I hate more than people who shell out money to go see an Ah-nuld movie, then go home and bitch about how stupid it was. Newsflash - you want smart, edgy material, you picked the wrong actor. There is a reason we came up with the "popcorn" genre title, and that reason is Ah-nuld. I, for one, will probably see this movie (maybe a renter), and will probably enjoy it. These movies are like one night stands - if you go into it with the right attitude, knowing what you're getting into, you won't hate yourself in the morning.
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She slays me every time. Baby, you're the greatest. Whether your posts are sincere or in jest, they're great. Those of you who rise to the bait, well, that's your perogative. I myself just derive pleasure from watching the feeding frenzy. But I will bite on one issue - what is on your "list" of acceptable films? Beethoven? Homeward Bound? Do tell, do tell.
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I can understand you not wanting children to see movies with violence and sexual situations in them. That is the reason we have the ratings system. The best way to keep children from harm is for a parent to do his/her job as a parent and not leave it up to a group, church sponsored or not. A group of people screening them to see if they are safe for the masses to consume, well...I find that a tad fascist. Would YOU want somebody telling you what is good for YOU? Of course not. God gave us free will, did He not? Then to keep people from acting on that free will would be to go against the word of God in a way. There is very little danger in any of these movies. Most are just harmless little power fantasies and I seriously doubt that any person who comes to this page will ever act out in a way depicted on the screen. As for disrespect for authority, Jesus Himself defied the Romans if I remember correctly. You are brave to post on this page. The next few answers to your message will no doubt be filled with expletives and such. Good luck. :)
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Damn! all the unique catchphrases have developed beautifully! CD looks good. Im with arnold schwarzenegger block!
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Linda Mason is a fake you morons. She (or he) obviously thinks themselves to be clever and is enjoying watching you idiots get all haired up over bullshit. Just ignore her crap, you know it's fake now.
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Watch as the sappy violin music starts and Ah-Nold and Allysa Milano star in a series of scenes showing their love for one another. I laughed my ass off when she sticks her ice cream cone in his face and Ah-Nold sees a "daddy I love you" card on the fridge. Classic comedy.
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Arnie is still making the same types of films that he has always made. Just that we have learned just how silly most action films really are, and arent willing to accept the same type of films that we have had stuck in our eyes during the 80's & 90's.
If arnie did something totally different, we would hate him for it (witness Jingle all the Way)
Yet when he does the same type of action flick, he comes under fire (no pun intended)
Arnie should retire and head for the Senate.
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...but using God as a platform for pushing censorship and hucksterism is out of line. Shame on you, Linda Mason.
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Feb 06, 2002 2:43:13 PM CST
I Am Goink To Puhsuhnally Kill Eadgh Und Ebvuhryvun Ob Der Talib
by buzz maverik
...I hade dose fokkahs! Heah I amb, tryink to make ein mobie to entuhtain peoble und uhn bik bocks (habe you seen der price ob decent cigahs ladely, nod der verdammt tings you roll yoah blonts mit?) und dos rakhead fokkahs fly aruhblanes into everyting und mage mein mobie loog lige id in bat tasde. I can zay rakhead und nod be ein racist becuase I call meinzelf ein kraut. Howevah, I cannot mage ein mobie mit Rae Dawn Chong oah Vanessa Villiams az mein loave interest yed nod kizz dem mitout beink ein racist. Ib id vill ged moah ob you owd to mein mobies, I vill do ein segs scene mit Beyonce Knowles. Hell, ib you vill all see mein mobie, I vill do ein segs scene mit Harry Knowles! I am sehr deschporot!
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...that was the last time I really enjoyed something he's been in. Arnold's films are only as good as their directors - period. Unfortunately those directors he has worked with multiple times have pretty much gone to pot, like Ivan Reitman, Chuck Vincent, Andrew Davis. Let's hope Jonathan Mostow breaks the chain with T3. Arnold never could act (that's why his best roles have the least dialogue Harry) not even if his life or the lives of his wife and kid (in the case of this film) depended on it.
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You know, fake or not, the mysterious Linda and her Carrie's Mom posts make for more interesting talk backs than the usual Star Wars is better/worse than LOTR tripe.
That being said...
Linda, it is not the filmaker's (or the studio's) responsibility to make a film reflecting anyone's morals or beliefs. Movies, all of them, even at their worst, are still someone's form of artistic expression (I know I know Ah-nold films stretch the term "artistic" to its breaking point), and are not beholden to ANYONE. interpret as you will. View at your own discretion. And, if you're the guardian of a person under the age of eighteen, let them view at your discretion. The world is a different place than it was during the "Golden Age" of cinema. Our society's mores are different, and film, tv, music, etc will reflect that. be warned. -
Commando? Red Heat? Complete shit. I don't want to see Arnold dodging huge fireball explosions (exploding 3 times- from 3 angles!)and getting shot at from 8 feet away by 4 guys with machine guns (who all miss). Pure fucking boredom. What I want to see is Arnold hewing the limbs off sweaty Corsairs to rescue a scantily-clad voluptuous maiden. We need another Conan movie, and we need it now! Milius will deliver us.
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Feb 06, 2002 3:15:49 PM CST
Und Quid Pigkink On Linduh. She Zounds Like Ein Feddow Repuhblig
by buzz maverik
Linduh, mein mobies ah nod violendt. Dy ah akchun-pagd! Und dey hab ein pozitif meschage! Namely, dat ein Bavarian schtronk-man vill hund down all der bat peoble foah you. Foah schome reason, peoble boughd dis in der '80s. I vould lige to gib you und yoah family free pazzes to mein mobie, but I need der moaney zo I vant eberyvun to pay to see KOLAHTAHRAL DAMACHE!
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I don lige peoble tawking abowd Linduh inschtedt ob me!
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Feb 06, 2002 3:23:20 PM CST
I admit, I have dirty thoughts about Mason. Dirty, dirty Priest
by priestyoungblood
Mil Mascaras - that was damn eloquent posting. Nicely put, even though I still suspect that Sister Mason is some bored film nut/ computer geek with too much time on his hands. I mean seriously, I know the Christian Right likes to waste their time, but this is seriously pushing it. I propose from now on, we get together a special group of pre-screeners to prevent movies like The Omega Code and Left Behind. And Creed videos, those should probably be banned too. Ah, what do I care, you wanna watch crap, be my guest. It's your brain, do with it what you will. As for Ah-nuld's new flick - I'm more curious about what's to happen to I Am Legend - any news people?
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From 1990-1995, Arnie made the sublime TOTAL RECALL, KINDERGARTEN COP & LAST ACTION HERO (both interesting and watchable failures), and, of course, T2 and TRUE LIES. Like'em or hate'em, all of those movies did something to advance the superhero action genre, to elevate it from the ranks of the Rambos and the Commandos. Arnie action movies no longer had inane, paperthing plots, generic invincible heroes, and bad-guys with the shooting accuracy of Helen Keller. And then he did ERASER, which was a throwback to the stupidity of 80's actioners, unimaginative, illogical, and boring, especially to an eye that had now been trained to expect more from action movies, and trained by Arnie himself. And it all went downhill from there. Arnold Schwartzenegger is the reason that people like Stallone, Seagal, and Van Damme no longer have real jobs. He taught us to expect more than good-guy shoots bad-guy in action movies, and then he went and renegged on that promise, which is the reason for his recent career woes. I've heard that he doesn't even pick up a gun in Collateral Damage, and, if that's right, it sounds like it's a step on the right track.
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Linda, I find your posts offensive, and feel they are spurring me towards violence and intolerance. Luckily, I have a solution. Before you post anything, please send it to my organization for review. That way, I can take out anything offensive before it reaches the public and runs the risk of influencing those who may lay eyes upon it. I'm sure you'll find this solution most agreeable.
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please don`t!!! no matter if harrison looked a bit bored at the golden globes and i know that his last movies weren`t so great....but compared to arnold.......man!!!!!!! arnold has one line dialouge in his films....one line-not more.
*sigh* didn`t already robin williams say: just one actor has less text than arnold schwarzenegger..(or similar):)
.......so please harry...never compare these two guys a second time..please! ;) -
Everyone here seems to think that I am against free speech or that I am some kind of Nazi. Far from it. All I'm saying is, look where the freedom you so blindly adhere to has led us. Violence in schools, homosexuals on television, "rock and roll" music with lewd lyrics, computer video games that endorse violence. All of these things lead to terrible consequences, and all of them can be stopped at the source. Namely, the putrid SEWER of Hollywood. Again, freedom of speech IS a good thing. But it must come at a price, as do all great freedoms. And, from my point of view, that price must be the establishment of a joint coalition of the Christian church and the US Government to regulate and monitor the content of movies. Music and television can come next after it's success has been proven.
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I knew it for sure when she put quotes around "rock and roll". You had a good thing going there, sir or madame, you just got greedy.
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Just thinking about you getting all hot and bothered and sweaty while you are typing up your messages..... hmmm, I need to go watch a good Christian movie to purge these impure sexual thoughts. Who the fuck am I kidding?
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Every last one of ya knows that your gonna be first ones on line when this show opens up! You talk a lot of bull about Arnold, but you'd take a drink from his Aryan mule if he asked ya to! And if anyone say different, I'll load up on my Momma's three-alarm chili and deposit and greasy Cleveland Steamer right on your lyin' face!
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You mean there were other movies made back then that weren't directed by Capra? That didn't star Shirley Temple? That weren't musical romps through winter wonderlands? ;-) Cagney performing the grapefruit facial scrub is another one of my fave "Christian Movie Moments"
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That was great! eek! Dear God, Linda has a gift. It is an absolute gift. A gift for taking away from whatever the topic is, and turning it into a Freedom of Speech debate with some nice Christian morality thrown in. and the wording of her posts - masterful! Seriously, I'm still waiting for the list of acceptable movies Linda, you red hot tub of Christian Fundamentalist love. Wait, don't get upset - I want the list. I'm curious to see which ones I've seen.
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It was the "Christian Church" that gave you away. Nice try though, now I'm all worked up after itchin' for a debate. I guess I'll just go find some pornography and jerk off to relieve my tension. Which Old Testament Book had the story where Lot's daughters got him drunk and raped him?
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Just wondering if anyone's heard Arnie doing an ad for the film on Moviefone. It may not be a good sign when your star can't say the movie's title. He sounds like he's getting Tom Brokaw's speech impediment (can't say the letter L).
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and he still can't pronounce for shit. That's okay, Arnie, I still love ya, man. "Hoppah vasn't just killt...he was SKINNT ALIFF!"
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Yeah, because general audiences have been waiting for 8 years for the further adventures of Harry Tasker. Don't get me wrong, TRUE LIES was a good action flick, it made some moneym and I love Arnold, but file TRUE LIES 2 in the NO ONE IS ASKING FOR IT category. In most cases, you only have a window of a few years to churn out a sequel before mainstream audiences have totally forgotten the original, and a TRUE LIES franchise is WAY past its sell-by date. So is BAD BOYS 2! Who has been staying up nights for 7 years wondering what happened to Smith and Lawrence's characters? NO ONE. Sorry to say this, but MEN IN BLACK 2 might even be coming a few years too late- though the original was a HUGE hit, it's not the kind of blockbuster that has any particular sentimental/re-watch value. I'd throw BLADE 2 in this category, too, though I do think the fan base for that film may have GROWN since the original, which wasn't a huge hit in theatres but has a decent following on video. Then again, ESCAPE FROM NY was a huge cult hit, but no one was really biting their nails for ESCAPE FROM LA 15 years later.
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Methinks Arnold, Harrison, Sly et al are a bit too long of tooth to pull this off for much longer. Why doesn't Hollywood snap to and smell the roses?
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Feb 06, 2002 5:56:50 PM CST
Why does anyone want to deny themselves the simple joy of an Arn
by nordling
I mean, hell, the man could deliver at one point. Show me someone who's world wasn't rocked by T2, or PREDATOR, or CONAN THE BARBARIAN, and I'll show you a corpse. Sure, they're dumb. Sure, they're bombastic and overly patriotic at times. Sure, Arnie can't act. Cant. Act. So what? You pretty much get what you ask for in an Arnie movie. I can't think of an Arnie movie I actively dislike, except for JUNIOR. Even SIXTH DAY was fun, at points. And I still think Arnie does give it the old college try. There are moments of poigancy in T2 and KINDERGARTEN COP, for one. He may be guilty of over-emoting, if anything. Give the guy a break. You get what you deserve if you go into an Arnie movie and don't like it. At least you know what you're getting. He's not shortchanging anyone. I'll be there this weekend.
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Harry... Please cease and decist all criticism of Harrison Ford's demeanor at the Golden Globes. Just knock it off. He is a real person. We like him because when he is not making some of the finest movies of all time, he is relaxing with his family on a ranch in Montana, saving kids from the wilderness in his helicopter. This persona does not translate to giving lavish speeches in ballrooms packed with the Hollywood elite. Harrison has always been laid back in his public appearances. Perhaps you would like him better if he was swilling spaghetti at Spago with Andy Garcia, hoping Julia Roberts would stop by and sit on his lap. Why don't you let people be who they are and use the energy you save to learn how to write a sentence that is grammatically correct. -- My opinion is harsh, but true.
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Feb 06, 2002 6:22:14 PM CST
Two Simple Words On How To Age Gracefully As An Action Star: Cli
by buzz maverik
Sure, Clint comes from a more mature, grittier age to begin with. He was never a human-cartoon and has a depth and acting talent Arnold wouldn't even want to comprehend. But he did star primarily in shoot-'em-ups for years, is conservative, worked out with weights and never got the respect he deserved until UNFORGIVEN, so with these similarities between them, Schwartzeneggar could learn a lot from Eastwood. See Eastwood never became a self-parody like Bronson or Reynolds, or sadly, Arnie. Arnie always seemed likely to go the Eastwood route, but has since strayed in latter-day Bronson territory. Arnie is known for his intelligence, and it's time he started using it again. No more action for the sake of action. KING CONAN is a must. His career really started with CONAN; it can restart with CONAN THE KING. No sequels to '80s or '90s hits, not even the fucking TERMINATOR unless he plays the man whom the genetic material for the T-800 was taken from. Forget being the same type of hero he was in his 30s and 40s. Work with name writers and directors or talented up 'n'comers (Arnie, have your people call me about THE MASTER GUNFIGHTER, it's not what you think -- sure I wrote it more with Willis in mind, but for a big chunk of change I can John Hughes a rewrite in about 24 hours). It's also time Arnie started directing and producing (see above referenced MASTER GUNFIGHTER, unless of course I get to direct it!).
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Feb 06, 2002 6:50:52 PM CST
What Happened to You Dillon? You Used to Be Someone I Could Trus
by ptwheems
someone should just film arnold making real prank calls and put that out. thats where the money is.
hey, im a police officer......... IM A COP YOU IDIOT!....... -
Criticising Harry for his spelling is like criticising Dennis Hopper for being a misogynist drunk, it's so imbedded in his character I don't think I could accept the change. Just be glad he passed through the American education system without helping himself to the pick of Grandpas arsenal and blowing away half his school.
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That was HYSTERICAL! Oh, my god, I think I just bust a gut laughing! Oh, man, whoooo! Calm down...That's some funny shit right there boy...
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Why must it be a Christian coalition with the government? Why not a Jewish or Muslim one? Why are your groups values better than those of others? If you want to take shelter and hide from the realities of life like homosexuality, drugs, broken homes, and violence then thats your choice. You can stand on your pedastool denouncing the evils of the world and waving a bible but that won't make the evil disappear. I also do not need a Christian group deciding what I can and can not view. I think I'm old enough to decide that on my own. Oh and have a nice day.
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Phil Hendrie
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Feb 06, 2002 11:18:47 PM CST
Linda Mason is OBVIOUSLY just some joker messing around, guys!
by elgyn6655321
That being said, "End Of Days" and "The Sixth Day" were BOTH good. If they were released in the 80`s, they would be considered two of his 'classics' today. It`s just that nowadays we feel like we HAVE to bust on Arnold becuase he`s no longer cool.
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And it's Arnie, so I'll give it a shot. Good to have you back, big guy. Now hie thee to the set of KING CONAN, forthwith. Buzz is right--if handled properly, it could be his UNFORGIVEN.
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When I 1st heard of this movie I thought it would be bad but lately I have heard a lot of good things about it. I haven't liked an Arnold movie since True Lies. He use to be king. Maybe this signals his return to making good movies? Action stars are boring now so maybe he can shake things up again. I'll find out Friday.
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Then brang on T3!
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Ya know... if there is one guy I want to see return to his former glory, it's Ah-nuld. He really was like a god back in the 1980's... all the way up to Terminator 2 and True Lies. I honestly just want to see him carrying a sword or taking shots IN THE FACE like he did in T2. Is he too old? Ahhh... who the hell knows... just would like to see someone that I actually believe could kick ass up on the screen. I mean, our more recent action stars pale in comparison to 'the big oak'. Did anyone actually believe Tom Cruise could kick ass like that in MI:2? It would be awesome to see Arnold come on screen and beat the shit out of that self-satisfied little bastard. Who did we have last summer? Ben Affleck? Angelina Jolie? The latest Hong Kong import? Try to picture one of them up against the goddamn Predator. Picture one of them as a Terminator. They all suck.
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Sorry Harry, but give me a break. A movie isn't good just because you will it to be so. "Oh John Turturro steps on the screen and I can make myself feel like I'm watching a Coen film." Dude, you spent more time on the resume of all the freaking actors than you did telling us about the movie. Just because everyone in the flick has been in a movie that you have enjoyed does not mean they all add up to a good movie. I'm not saying the movie sucks, I havn't seen it. I just got the heavy impression that you're in denial about Awnuld.
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Maybe your views hold a point in this world Linda, but this is simply a discussion group for an Arnie film!! Mind you, Arnie's films have tended to have more personal and moral lights than any other star's I know - Total Recall was about a man finding his true identity, Terminator1 & 2 about hope and love in a dark future, heck, End of Days was about a warrior asking God himself for faith in beating Satan rather than turning to guns!! To the others: I've seen almost every Arnie actioner (with the exception of End of Days - millenium IT schedules, pah!!) on the big screen here in the UK and I'll be there for this one. Just hope it makes it here soon!!
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CD hits the green fields of England March 1st. Can't wait.
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Linda Mason - Know all about being on your knees do you? What the fuck is it with you annoying little Hitlers with all your trumped up Napolean complexes? Can't you handle the fact that some people like a bit of fun? Not everyone likes to live their life based on a series of historically innaccurate fictional books for fucks sake, so stick your morals fair up there where you prefer dogs cocks.
Well, listen here, colostamy-breath! I enjoy movies primarily for 'escapism'. Doesn't make me morally challenged at all, nor am I maladjusted. I don't recall MY beliefs sparking off crusades and what-not causing millions of deaths throughout history! Sure, the odd film of cinematic genius that treats violence etc the way it should be (Saving Private Ryan, Schindlers List etc) is wonderful, but now and then I like to sit back, see a plethora of bouncy tits waddle their way across my screen, and a big crazy motherfucker like Arnie take out all my frustrations on fictional characters. It gives me something to cheer for, lets me think that maybe somewhere in the world there's a situation, made up or not, that ends up with the arsehole brigade getting a shotgun enema!
Moulin Rouge = Pornography? Bwahahahahahahaha! Obviously for you, art (and artistic film vision in this case) is something beyond your brain-washed comprehension. Regulating films the way you propose is just a poor mans censorship, at least have the ovaries to say what you mean!
Homophobic obviously, I'd have thought a fan of arse-raping like you would find that lifestyle appealing, but whatever. I'm not gay, but I have a few bi friends, and I've had to defend them against draconian attitudes like yours from people just like you who don't quite realise that we don't live in the 1800's anymore, and that the church can no longer brainwash peoples belief systems. You don't like, the authors of your absurd little books didn't like it (closet fudge-packers methinks) and so the easiest way is to declare it all against God. Grow up! Those same books also advocate the death penalty for damned near everything, and most importantly teach the value of NOT judging others! Christians ('good christian people' - interesting oxymoron if I ever heard one) CAN pre-view films prior to allowing their similarly brainwashed kids to watch them. Duh, that's what most parents do anyway. And furthermore, without parents forvefeeding their kids all this religious bullshit, organised religion would be dead within a generation. Maybe you people should objectively look at yourselves and how you ram your way of life down everyones throat! People have a need to believe in something greater than their own lives, this is true, just quit taking advantage of it with this christian crap! People can believe/watch what they want, let them do so!
BTW, what the fuck gives only CHRISTIANS the right to decree what we can all watch? Jackass said earlier, he can pray to his own vomit if he wants to, maybe we should put said vomit on this so-called coalition to censor the shit out of movies? It would certainly make more sense than you do, demented bitch!
Hell, that was a novel of a message. Ah well, it's good to vent. And before any God-squad fanatics start blasting me, I have no problem with your belief systems, only when self-rightous morons try and ram the shit down my throat!
Linda Mason - You are the weakest link. Suck my balls! -
It's strange, a group of good, god fearing christians recently participated in a book burning of the obviously godless books of Joanne Rowling, those evil Harry Potter books. Some 60 years ago, the Nazi's engaged in book burings of books they considered evil and godless... so obviously christians and Nazi's have a lot in common. Oh yeah, we killed the 2 million vietnamese because they didn't agree with our ideals. Oh... and the fine christian crusade, that equally morally justified rape of constantinple. All good work, because it was done in the name of christianity. Sorry Linda, but you spout some serious rubbish. Open your eyes. And one last thing... christians have been persecuting jews for ages... but Jesus was a jew... ain't it a bummer!
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Linda, you're special, I'm probably everything you despise, so I'm gonna be blunt, show us your tits! Come on, god knows I don't ask for much, (and you can probably check on that!!!) "That's my definition of freedom?" Freedom; N being free. Free; able to act at will, not compelled or restrained. Freedom by definition is the complete opposite of Christianity. Are you saying you're free? If so you'll have to stop telling everyone you're a Christian, they might start to think you're not telling them the truth. Cheers.
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That all of you know that I'm right. Why else would you spend so much time debating what I've said. Because, although you'd never admit it, you know that I have a point. Movies today have gotten out of our control. You must understand that I personally do not have any stake in this. All of this is for the children. If we continue to pollute their minds with sludge, what kind of generation are we raising? All I ask is that we, as concerned members of our community, remove ourselves from the creative process and allow people with some authority help us make the right choices. I know I don't want to see the innocent children suffer because of something they saw in the movies? If we allow the church and government to monitor entertainment, we won't have to shoulder that burden.
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What a strange place to have a discussion on religion. Whether Linda Mason is for real or not, I thought this would be a good place for me to add my 2 cents on the subject. First cent: Christians want to review/censor books and movies and get rid of those with violence, sex, witchcraft, demons, etc. Therefore, if they aren
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That's all old Hank's got to add to this discussion.
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Linda, you give us Christians a bad name. You sound like a Nazi.
I think you would be interested to know that my preacher is a big Arnold fan. I guess he is going to burn in Hell too!? HAHAAHAH! If you really believe in God quite judging people. That's not your job. I'm looking forward to Collateral Damage. I going on opening night! Hopefully this is the beginning of a return to some good action movies. Most of them have been so boring lately. -
Feb 07, 2002 11:34:49 AM CST
HARRISON FORD - Harry stop baggin, he hasn't changed one bit
by thorn ms
Harrison Ford onscreen and offscreen are two different guys. I remember seeing interviews with him 20 years ago and over the decades... he is as dry as unbuttered toast. He is slow, boring, and speaks in a monotone without any semblance of life. THAT'S HOW HE's ALWAYS BEEN... so, give him a break. What you saw was nothing new and is no reflection of his onscreen magic. I don't know how he does it, going from deadman to charismaman, but he does - and that's all anyone needs to know.
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Feb 07, 2002 11:51:52 AM CST
" I'm making a stand, everybody knows this is a shake-down"
by silver_joo
Steven Seagal actually said that in his defence against sexual harassment charges. He is more of 'a fighter' that Arnold will ever be. He is down with DMX, baby!
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I'd like everyone to stop stereotyping all religious people as nazis who want to ban all art and kill all the dark people. I happen to have been brought up in a very religious background that is still a rather fundamental part of my psychological makeup (even after the experimentation with cocaine and massive rewatchings of SE7EN), and I am very pro-first amendment. I think all artists should be able to create what they need to create, without interference from the government, the church, or the STUDIO. Even though I guess I'm a Christian, I'm also pro-choice, pro-gay rights, a staunch Democrat, and pro-legalization of marijuana (just to rid ourselves of the criminal element currently inherent in its distribution). Don't stereotype all religious people as right-wing Pat Buchanan clones, because we're not. Show the same openmindedness towards a large demographic of people as you would hope people would show towards you.
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Bring on the DAMAGE! The reviews are in - Collateral Damage is the movie to see this weekend. 'nuff said
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Feb 07, 2002 1:32:49 PM CST
I Hab Reht Bozz Mahvuhreich's Schript DER MASTRABATOR GUHNFI
by buzz maverik
Hokey, vhile ebreybohdy vould easchily buy me as ein L.A. policie kommisar who schinglehundidly schtops ein team ob guhmuhn in an aschachainachun attempdt (opiouzly Bozz tryink to whride zo dat der schreenplay coult ahdahpted into der DIE HAHT oah LEADTHUL VEAPON fronchizes) und ents op ein natchunal zeleprity. Bot vhat no prodocuh, eschpechially vun who hat cratchuated vrom U. Ezz.Zee. vould ged, iz der schrtream ob hid men, zychos and killahs who den cohm aftah mein cahractuh to mage der rebs, until mein cahractuh vinds himschelf in ein schowdown mit der mosd dancherouz vun ob all. You zee, Bozz, you schtaht oud sehr gut, den you alvays ged suhreal. No, I vill tage mein nexd chob vrom Rop Cohen und coschtar as Vin Diesil's Dat, Pops Diesil in DER FASCHT UND DER FUHRIOUZ ZWEI!
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Feb 07, 2002 1:36:43 PM CST
As A Right Wing Anarchist And Practicioner Of Black Magick, I Fe
by buzz maverik
Those Harry Potter books! I say burn 'em! That's not magick! Where are the sexual rituals? The kuhdalini? The alternate acts of good and evil? Get it right or don't do it at all, I say!
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In retrospect, X-Men *would* have made a billion dollars if Stallone and Schwarzenegger were in it...
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[Matrix has thrown a pipe through Bennett] Matrix: Let off some steam, Bennett.*** Matrix: You're a funny man, Sully, I like you. That's why I'm going to kill you last***Matrix: Remember, Sully, when I promised to kill you last?
Sully: That's right, Matrix. You did! Matrix: I lied. *** Cindy : What did you do with Sully? Matrix : I let him go. *** Matrix: [after killing a man in the plane] Don't disturb my friend, he's dead tired. *** Matrix : Come on, Bennett... Let's party *** Matrix : F*CK YOU, a**hole!. *** Matrix: I'll be back, Bennett! *** -
When we get caught up in our "Freedom of Speech" rants, let's try not to generalize too much. Not all christians are anti-speech, in fact, very few are. They're not pro-censorship, or anyting like that. Just a small, vocal and annoying component. calling "christians" nazis or whatever, is the same as believing in the Jewish worldwide banking conspiracy. Damn those Jews and their mystical ways! (anyone know that one?) Anyway, I'm changing my tack and starting to believe the sultry, tawdry Ms. Mason is on the level, because were she truly a troll, she might actually address some of the comments directed at her. However, conveniently, she simply rephrases the same posts over and over, without actually RESPONDING to any challenges, which, as many know is the chief tactic of the ignorant, uninformed fanatic. No offense Linda. Seriously, you're sweet, you little red hot buttercup you. C'mere and sit on Daddy's lap.
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Did anyone catch Ah-nuld on Howard Stern this morning? If so, please send me a translation because I have NO IDEA WHAT THE FUCK HE WAS SAYING. Perhaps Buzz Maverick could translate for me. Buzz, help a brotha out here. Something about Collateral Damage and T3, I think. Sadly, little or no mention of King Conan.
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This is one of the worst movies I have ever seen.
Elias Koteas was the only good part. Arnold was awful, the dialogue, the action was circa 1988...ugh.
What a piece of trash. The theater was laughing the whole time. ( was a sneak preview, free radio contest tickets)
Arnuld is a joke...and whoever bankrolled this movie are idiots...the premises is ridiculous enough
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This movies looks like good harmless fun....after all...it cant be worse than his role in Batman and Robin
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I hope my tirade didn't indicate any generalisations. My rant was targetting Herr Mason and cronies like her, be they Christian, Satanists or Garbologists. I have quite a few friends of the faith, and Jews I might add, and totally agree that they are of a wide demographic. I say again, my issue is not with Christians in general, just self-righteous gorgons like her!
Peace.
Anyhoo, so far as Arnie goes, I still tend to enjoy his movies, even the crap ones, so bring em on! I may not fork out a 10er to see this one at the flicks, but I will have a look on DVD. Cheers people. -
Feb 07, 2002 11:13:54 PM CST
Harry, Moriarty, whatever authority figure is reading this, plea
by lenny nero
Some people enjoy her crazy rants, be they real or not, but it's just taking up space and is just getting people angry. This is a film website, and it should stay that way. I don't come here for deep discussions on speech and religion and whatnot, I just want to read some movie news, some reviews, and other things from people such as myself. It's not the most professional site, and that's the way I like it. So please, please ban this Linda Mason, because these conversations are going nowhere.
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Linda Mason I'M A CHRISTIAN and I don't want YOU or anyone like YOU deciding what I watch! ANSWER the question or you ARE a TROLL. What movies PASS your standards? IF you are a Christian you are one of those who thinks CATHOLICS are cultists! The most Christian movie out right now is Lord of the Rings and your kind of Christians probably think its BAD FOR THE CHILDREN. Does LOTR get on your list? Does it? ANSWER!
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dont think so kiddies - che check out http://www.rottentomatoes.com/movie-1110242/
Way bad reviews :(
MTFBWY
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Linda Mason sounds like a fake. But anyway, I'll get on with questions for her/him/whatever: -EXACTLY what movies do you watch? -If the rest of us live in 2002 America (or any other part of the world, for that matter), are you stuck in 1940s Germany with the Nazis? -Why don't you just change the channel or put on something you do like and leave the rest of us alone? In fact, why don't you just go get laid? I hate censorship, as do my fellow TBrs and don't ever foresee the government or church coming to "cleanse" my movie experience, so bye-bye, rim-job!!
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enlighten us...
a fellow talkbacker in disguise, a film exec, or an aicn fat cat... -
No offense, my friend, but your clues are leading you in the wrong direction. I know who Linda Mason is, and anyone taking credit for being her is lying. Is it too hard to imagine that Linda Mason is actually...Linda Mason?
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Just playin'. I figured no one here is as ignorant as the poster-playing Linda Mason. I just think we should clarify our language a little. No sweat, no harm, no foul. 'scool. Linda, last night was a blast baby, you are one freaky chick.
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She's repetitive, annoying...seemingly oblivious to any developing facts relating to her discussion that would in any way refute her claims? Are you implying that Linda Mason is really...MERCIER?
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I know what proof you're talking about. Some guy named anal-thrack or something claiming to be Linda Mason. Trust me when I tell you he's lying. I can provide proof for you that's far more galvanizing. Doing so would pretty much put an end to the whole Linda Mason thing once and for all. Look, I can prove, conclusively that ebonic does not know Linda. For me, I'd rather keep the mystery intact. Linda is up there with Mercier and Dan Maunz as one of the more hated villains on this site. I personally like having her around. What I don't like is other people taking credit for her moves. The ball is in your court, ebonic. But you have to trust me when I tell you that you are barking up the wrong tree.
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ebonic and phantom, don't scare her/him off. Next to Buzz's Ah-nuld impressions, she's the funniest damn thing on AICN in ages - TROLLICIOUS!!!! Lip-smacking goodness. Hey Buzz, glad there's some other right wing anarchist practitioners of Black Magick out there. Do what thou wilt, right Linda? Hey Linda, do you have red hair? Would you like to participate in a real religious service? I personally don't care if you're real or not, just keep up the good work. You're doing a great job of making the funamentalists look like fools.
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Check it out!
http://www.nypost.com/movies/38956.htm -
Said it to Howard Stern as reported at http://www.thearnoldfan.com/news/news/56.htm
Please God, let him do a Conan film. God I love the first film. . .
Matt -
come on, Arnold, last chance...
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First, I tend to agree with you but only to a certain extent. I agree, the vast majority of entertainment being produced is absolutely lacking any appreciable value. Movies, TV, music, you name it. There is not a drop of substance to be squeezed from the lot, at least on whole. However, this is where our opinions take a wildly divergent turn from one another. I don't like what is out there all that much, but I am intelligent enough to exercise my right to not watch the garbage. I for one wouldn't be caught dead watching Collateral Damage, no matter what Harry or anyone else says about it. This is the kind of movie that has nothing for me. But I am not offended by it's existence, nor do I begrudge anyone else the opportunity to see it for themselves.
Now, I didn't read your original post but it really doesn't take a rocket scientist to understand where you are coming from. I think your question is whether we should expose the children to programming that might be questionable. I think the answer to this question is really very simple, parents need to be parents. The government has no place legislating morality, period. And the church has even less place in helping the government to do so. There are simply too many divergent religious viewpoints in this country to ever be able to accommodate everyone. And to put our government in the business of making moral decisions for us is a mistake and worse, is a cop out on your part.
I take it you are a parent. And even if you aren't the theory I espouse still applies. Parents are responsible for their kids, not the government, not the church, and most certainly not me. If you have a child, then by all means, don't let them watch what you find objectionable. But don't ask me to concede my rights so that your parenting can be made easier. I didn't take on a commitment to help you raise your child when you decided to have one. Stand up and be a proud parent. Take an active role in your child's life. Asking the government to moralize entertainment is the worst thing you could do. It reeks of "I am too lazy to keep an eye on my child's viewing habits to be effective. Please do my job for me." Don't ask for my rights to be infringed upon so your job can be easier. No one ever promised that raising a child would be easy, to the contrary, most would say it is a hard job. If you or others like you are not up to the task, then don't have kids. This country seems to be of the opinion that having a child is some kind of entitlement, whether you are able to support them or not. I, madam, whole heartedly disagree. Have kids when you can afford to invest your time and love into them.
Don't be angered by the existence of what you would consider questionable moral content in movies and television. You have a choice to not watch it. You also have the choice to not let your children watch it. Exercise these choices. If you want to be angry, be angered at the fact that the entertainment is usually just plain bad, not immoral, but bad. Be angry that there aren't more creative people out there to make decent entertainment.
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Feb 08, 2002 3:51:20 PM CST
Anyone who said to check out Rottentomatoes.com's rating for
by superhero
If it looks like crap, smells like crap, it's probably crap. Nice try Arnie but it's time to flip you 'cause you're DONE!
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I just got back from seeing the movie. I'm a huge Arnie fan, but this movie is sadly disappointing. It's not his "big comeback." This movie is really no departure from End of Days and The 6th Day. As in those two movies, you find yourself struggling in the theater to enjoy what you're watching. If you liked End of Days and The 6th Day, then you'll very likely enjoy this one. It's their equal, if not slightly better, but a "big comeback," "whole new side of Arnie," or "Arnie's best movie since...", this is not. You just get the feeling that you've seen it all before, but done much better (such as in The Fugitive, Clear and Present Danger, and Arnie's own True Lies).
Thankfully, though, the final 15 minutes saves this movie. If the movie had ended as predictably as the first hour and half, then all of those horrible reviews above would be completely and fairly deserved. The final 15 minutes, though, is a breath of fresh air and brings the movie up to a "decent" rating. If you're going to pay full price to see the movie, though, you had better go in with either some pretty low expectations or a sugar high. It's definitely worth a $5/6 matinee price, though... since, afterall, it IS Arnie. -
Go hunt through your CD collection - put aside the King James choir albums and Gregorian chant music - and dig out the well worn copy of Marshall Mathers for the solution to your problems lies inside. As Slim so simply put it - "Excuse me, I thought you were parents".
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please don`t!!! no matter if harrison looked a bit bored at the golden globes and i know that his last movies weren`t so great....but compared to arnold.......man!!!!!!! arnold has one line dialouge in his films....one line-not more. *sigh* didn`t already robin williams say: just one actor has less text than arnold schwarzenegger..(or similar):) .......so please harry...never compare these two guys a second time..please! ;)
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Feb 09, 2002 9:29:07 PM CST
This is what needs to be said about this Linda person -- from bo
by moviedude02
My gosh...
I am enraged right now... Let it be said before I make my statements that I am a born again christain... And this Linda person is the type of naive coward that we don't need in America. She is a disgrace to my religion (in my opinion), but only God decides that. Linda, this site contains filth, pure filth...if your against it all....why are you here? God is no resident policeman... he gave us free will....if we are making mistakes, God will punish us...quit playing God, Linda! Keep your mouth shut please....we dont want to hear it! And how can you say that hollywood should take away the violence and gore, etc??? Would you like them to make "Saving Private Ryan" rated G? Why not shield our poor little minds? (booh hoo).... It would be a crime to take out the violence from war movies and terroist movies! Sorry to tell yah, but life is rated R for pervasive graphic violence.....we see it in our everyday lives and war movies and such help us realize the truth....we dont want to be brainwashed!!!!! -
I don't know what the critics are talking about... the film was superbly done. After seeing it twice, I must say, being an Arnie fan or a non-Arnie fan, you'll come away from this film easily satisfied. 'nuff said. Enjoy!
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"GET DAAAOOOWN!!" I dont agree or diSagree with anyone and I'd just like to say that this movie was a very large piece of ass. Sure it was pointless action of the kind that we haven't had in a while, bUt a most of the charaCters and some cheesy-ass plot (even for an action movie focusing on one actor kicking other people's asses repeatedly) details make this suck. REAL BAD. It worKed for you, not for me. That'S all I have to say."When are you going to kill me?!... NOW!!" Get the fuck outta here.
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This was an extremely rote and mediocre film. I really was embarassed for Arnie in this thing. This made Eraser look classic.
I liked some of the casting, but none of them were really given a lot to do. Leguizamo basically has a glorified cameo before he's killed off. Turturro's appearance is also a glorified cameo.
I liked Koteas and would have to have seen something more done with his character...before he gets killed off, too.
Let's see, that's 4 pieces of crap in a row: Batman and Robin, End of Days, the Sixth Day, and now this.
I hear that filming for T3 begins April 15 or thereabouts.
I can't say I am real excited about that project since Cameron isn't even involved.I have always been nervous about the idea of a part 3. Why?
Because they are really going to have a hell of a time making a plausible sequel after the events of part 2.
Maybe it's just me, but didn't part 2 seem to close the door nicely on things? I think they are going to really have to fish for strings to pick up. I hope I am extremely, pleasantly surprised.
Arnie looks great for a 54 year old. Awesome, in fact, but...is he really going to be believable as cyborg now?
I think the Conan sequel, if it's done sooner rather than later, would be more believable because Arnie's age could actually be used in a good way there. -
pointless violence + gay vampires + moulin rouge type pornography = $$$$$$$$$$$ for hollywood.
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Harry is right on this time. Jaded film-critics, holier-than-thou "film" geeks and studio plants, can all royally whack themselves off to 8x10s of Stephen Soderberg and suck Arnie's big keilbasa, then promptly stick their pointy academe heads up Linda Masons tight ass. Collateral Damage was great, fun, entertainment like action movies used to be and should still be. All without being heavy-handed or preachy, or wrapping up terrorism in any neat answers, just giving you the goods dammit. And it's absolutely what we over in the US need right about now. I know there are a lot of non-US types here, so to my "friends" in the EU, if you disagree, you may kindly shove your multilateralism "shite" up each others "arses" and do try to hold out until we bail you out of yet another World War.
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Feb 10, 2002 5:40:28 PM CST
Linda, oh Linda, were is my little love bug? Can actually post a
by electric_monk
At first, I wasn't going to respond. I mean it seemed it was decided that this "Linda Mason" could not be real, that she was (or he was) just some dork trying to get attention. But the more you read the rant, the more it does not become an issue of who she is, but of the words. You see, there are plenty of people who exist in this world who believe in what this "Mason" person writes. Even if it is just a joker, the essence of the rant still exists. There will be people who see those words and will take it upon themselves to dictate censorship. The minds of most people are weak, and its people like this "Linda Mason" and others of her ilk, that prey upon them, just like bully in the school yard terrorizing the nerd, or even a pedophile. That may seem a drastic way of putting it, but then these are the tactics of the Right. They see giving gays the right to adopt (as seen on a recent thread posted on MSN) as horrifying, why to them, we would be just one step away from letting murders go free (though we did do that with OJ Simpson) or legalizing bestiality. How one makes that leap is beyond me. It is just like saying religion is really a cult, designed to brainwash people into thinking that we must all agree on everything. While this might work for the Nazi's, it sure does not ring true in America. There's a nice leap. The truth is, we live in a country that gives us more freedoms to be who we want to be than most other countries. In doing so, there is going to be disagreements on everything. As Penguin said in Batman Returns "
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Harry I agree with everything you have stated in this review. The local paper where I live gave it 1.5 stars and a horrible review. I knew right away based upon this aholes previous reviews that I was going to like it. Highly recommended.
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Harry likes an Collateral Damage and Hannibal, but didn't really like Black Hawk Down... Putz.
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Don't you know how to type "Spoiler alert", "Spoiler warning" or something like that? Asshole!
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What's wrong with you harry? This movie was crap! And YOU CANT GO BACK YOU SAID YOU LIKED IT! When everyone says it sucks dont pull a godzilla 1998 and start saying you hated it. Here is my review.
_________________________________
When you flush your toilet do you ever wonder were all the waste ends up? The answer is Hollywood. Where to start? How about with the plot. Gordy Brewer (Arnold Schwarzenegger) is a firefighter for about 3 minutes on screen. He -
I love these conversations. On one side we have Linda Mason, who seems to have good intentions but is severely misguided. I don't think the government has the mental capacity to negotiate prices on toilet seats, much less decide what kind of entertainment should be available to the public to view. As for the church, I consider myself a very conservative Christian man, but I also know enough about history to know that when any religious organization is given too much power, bad things happen. They're no more immune to the trappings of power than a congressman is. On the other side, we have people that are ripping Linda a new one, calling her an intolerant Nazi in so many words, yet they can't tolerate her point of view. It's the classic liberal position: Freedom of speech as long as you agree with everything I say. I could go on forever bashing this side of the argument, but that would take away from the fact that Collateral Damage was thoroughly mediocre. And I have to agree with Harry, the shower scene with the kid was just plain disturbing, although not nearly as disturbing as the love scene in "Enemy at the Gates".
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Mar 10, 2002 12:34:15 AM CST
i know this is late, and probably no one will read this, but i h
by a goonie
certainly his worst since Eraser, which i didn't like. but probably worse than Eraser. at least Eraser had cool guns. that's not exactly a big compliment for a movie, but still, at least it had that. Collateral Damage is trash. complete and utter trash. terrible story, terrible acting, terrible script, terrible direction, terrible photography, terrible pacing. it's all here. and it's all terrible. it's as though Davis shot a series of action scenes and taped them together. that's how sloppy the movie is. but to make matters worse, every action scene is DREADFUL. not ONE action scene is any good, has any redeemable factors. it all just blows. man... makes me wonder... why do i always forgive Arnie?
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The kid brings the dinosaur with bomb inside into the government building. Why is the toy exempted from going through the metal detectors during security checks. I thought the movie was okay but this little detail was a flaw in the script. there would be no reson to take the toy aside and pass it around the detectors.
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This freak's review is terrible and full of errors.
He says he knew the movie would be bad as soon as he heard Arnold's character's name was Gordie. What kind of demented logic is this? People don't pick their own names in real life so it reflects nothing. some cool people have geeky names and some geeky people have cool names. And this idiot can judge a whole fictional movie on the character's fictional name?
Also, he says people don't listen to their lives in real life. Newsflash: some people actually do. this self-proclaimed freak lives in a small world.
He also say Arnold's Australian. I think the word he's looking for is Austrian. there's a difference of a few thousand miles on the globe.
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