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Published on Wednesday, January 2, 2002 - 4:49pm |
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Why OCEAN'S ELEVEN was Father Geek's most disappointing film of 2001, and the 19 Vegas films he enjoys more
Father Geek here. After reading Harry's list of film disappointmets in 2001 I got to thinking about my own cinema let downs of the year. You don't see 300+ movies in theaters in a year without catching some very bad ones, lots of them, but you hope that the ones you've been following the progress on will at least make up for all the real stinkers... the totally unwatchable ones that when you're in a job like mine you have to watch all the way through anyway.
OCEAN'S ELEVEN was my biggest disappointment. Now its NOT a bad movie, its just a... a... an ordinary movie. And a big letdown for ol' Father Geek. Like Harry I loved the original script. The director is one of my absolute favorites. Annnnnnd I enjoy everyone in the cast nearly everytime they have appeared on screen in recent years. Unlike Planet of the Apes, AI, Driven, Pearl Harbor, Ali, and other disappointments for me this year, going into the theater to see this flick I felt that I would be "totally satisfied." I had no reservations. I thought this cast had a very good chanch to pull off the magic that the original Ratpack had in the 1968 motion picture. And since that flick wasn't the best directed, or anywhere near the best caper film ever made I just had faith that this cast and crew, and modern film effects and editing and sound whould just propel this new version into my Top Ten list for the year. My faith was sorely misplaced. I was bored almost to the point of tears. Everyone appeared to be sleepwalking through their roles. The only thing more mediocre than the acting range was the terribly tired plot for the caper itself. Yawn!!! The impossible heist flick has been done alot and nearly everyone I can think of is pulled off better than 2001's Ocean's Eleven. Its not that the movie is a really bad flick, that at least would make it conversational, or laughable, or controversal. NO, this film is "just so so,"... "Ho hum,"... "plain vanilla." It has thus landed at number 20 on my list of fave Las Vegas motion pictures...
1. Machine Gun McCain, 1968, with John Cassavetes, Peter Falk, Gina Rowlands, Britt Ekland, and as Joby Cudo... Jim Morisson of The Doors in his only non-singing film role.
2. 3000 Miles to Graceland, 2001, with Kurt Russell, Ice T, Christian Slater, Kevin Costner, David Arquette, and Courteney Cox. It kicks ass!
3. Las Vegas Story, 1952, with Victor Mature, Vincent Price, Jane Russell, and Hoagy Carmichael, classic noir.
4. Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas, 1998, What can I say? Depp and del Toro are simply outstanding here.
5. Casino, 1995, Scorsese at his best with DeNiro, Stone, Pesci, and Woods all exceptional.
6. Leaving Las Vegas, 1995, With Nick Cage, Elizabeth Shue, and Julian Sands. There's more acting range shown here by the worst of these three than in the total of this year's Ocean's Eleven cast.
7. Perdita Durango, 1997, Alex de la Iglesia's masterwork of terror , with Rosie Perez, Don Stroud, and Screamin Jay Hawkins. Incredible!
8. Six-String Samurai, 1998, 10000 times more fun than Oceans 11.
9. Godfather 2, 1974, Not really a Vegas flick, but enough of one that it lands here on this specialized list.
10. The Night Stalker, 1972, There's a 1000 times more "cool" in this than Ocean's Eleven.
11. Very Bad Things, 1998, With really strong performances by Jon Favreau, Cameron Diaz, Christian Slater, and Daniel Stern.
12. Viva Las Vegas, 1964, Elvis and Ann Margret, very yummy!
13. Bugsy, 1991, With Beatty, Bening, Keitel, Elliott Gould, and Bebe Neuwirth.
14. Ocean's Eleven, 1968, With the real, original, uber cool Ratpack. These guys were real life buddies and it shows here, the magic comes out.
15. The Amazing Colossal Man, 1957, A classic terror of the atom flick, low production values, but loads of fun.
16. The Grasshopper, 1970, With lovely Jacqueline Bisset, Jim Brown, and Joseph Cotten.
17. Hell's Angels 69, 1969, "Real" Hell's Angels rob Ceasar's Palace.
18. Ebony, Ivory, and Jade, 1979, A racially mixed Charlie's Angels. High kicking fun!
19. Showgirls, 1995, Not the best written or acted flick... but, it did have it's finer "points," ones that are missing from Ocean's Eleven.
20. Ocean's Eleven, 2001, Just your average middle-of-the-road, safe Hollywood "product." Nothing to write home about!
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Reader Talkback
WTF? by selectd | Jan 2nd, 2002 03:56:29 PM | My father's opinion: by The Colonel | Jan 2nd, 2002 03:58:34 PM | 3000 Miles to Graceland was
absolutely terrible! by metsrulein2k | Jan 2nd, 2002 03:59:39 PM | WHAT?! by goonie | Jan 2nd, 2002 04:00:12 PM | How in the hell can you put
3000 Miles to Graceland in
front of by Marek | Jan 2nd, 2002 04:04:42 PM | Father Geek, How can you have
SHOWGIRLS ahead of Oceans 11
2001? by Marek | Jan 2nd, 2002 04:06:14 PM | Holy Cow! by Mr. Little-Jeans | Jan 2nd, 2002 04:09:40 PM | JESUS FUCKING CHRIST! by Dr.Midnight32 | Jan 2nd, 2002 04:12:03 PM | everyone is entitled to their
own opinion.... by shaggy-g | Jan 2nd, 2002 04:24:35 PM | Machine Gun McCain not
available by spoits | Jan 2nd, 2002 04:25:35 PM | 3000 Miles of agony by Enax | Jan 2nd, 2002 04:25:46 PM | ....and another thing by shaggy-g | Jan 2nd, 2002 04:27:34 PM | The original Ocean's 11 is
just horrible! by BigTuna | Jan 2nd, 2002 04:29:22 PM | Yeah! Six-String Samurai!!!!
by Smugbug | Jan 2nd, 2002 04:36:13 PM | You should really write your
column when sober!!! by Joel Goodson | Jan 2nd, 2002 05:10:51 PM | the good father has sinned
against you oh lord! by jonnyaction | Jan 2nd, 2002 05:11:01 PM | SHOWGIRLS deserves to be ahead
of Ocean's Eleven....now
excu by Mully4Ever | Jan 2nd, 2002 05:15:46 PM | I aint no GOD DAMN SON OF A
BITCH, You better think about
it bab by SamBlackChvrch21 | Jan 2nd, 2002 05:27:05 PM | stop being a spolied sport
Oceans 11 Rules by JJRoxusa | Jan 2nd, 2002 05:28:37 PM | 3000 Miles?!! W.T.F.?! by rubycanoe | Jan 2nd, 2002 05:30:29 PM | Okay, we get the point that
O-11 isn't loved in the
Knowles by Rufus_T_Firefly | Jan 2nd, 2002 05:42:46 PM | I NEVER Talkback, but.... by bunglebb | Jan 2nd, 2002 05:54:48 PM | Wow that was thunderously
pointless and dumb. by ItsOver | Jan 2nd, 2002 06:07:45 PM | Gotta agree by AshFett | Jan 2nd, 2002 06:13:50 PM | drugs (that's gotta be it) by trentonkyle | Jan 2nd, 2002 06:24:23 PM | Where's the love for Vegas
Vacation?? by 14byit | Jan 2nd, 2002 06:26:25 PM | Sauron by Sultan0fSwat | Jan 2nd, 2002 06:38:24 PM | OUTRAGE! WHERE IS HONEYMOON
IN VEGAS?? by NotchJohnson | Jan 2nd, 2002 06:42:05 PM | A racially-mixed Charlie's
Angels? by Darth Boner | Jan 2nd, 2002 06:45:30 PM | YET AGAIN A RIDICULOUS COLUMN
AT AICN THAT MAKES YOUR EYES
BURN by Big Dumb Ape | Jan 2nd, 2002 06:47:35 PM | "Showgirls" just blew (pun
intended) your credibility. by HateThaNet | Jan 2nd, 2002 06:51:17 PM | 3000 Minutes to Debasement by NiceMarmot | Jan 2nd, 2002 06:52:25 PM | A Las Vegas perspective by Redbeard_NV | Jan 2nd, 2002 06:52:48 PM | I don't think people "got"
the point of the Ocean's
Elev by superhero | Jan 2nd, 2002 07:19:10 PM | 3000 Miles To Graceland is
complete and utter BALLSACK. by Black Jesus | Jan 2nd, 2002 07:57:32 PM | Sultan by Znosaro | Jan 2nd, 2002 07:59:17 PM | does anyone here... by seacaptain | Jan 2nd, 2002 08:29:37 PM | Ocean's 11 by Billy Talent | Jan 2nd, 2002 08:39:31 PM | I played Showgirls at the at
Midnight for my new years eve
party by MentallyMariah | Jan 2nd, 2002 09:09:01 PM | Don't quit your day job,
Father Geek.... by CoolDan989 | Jan 2nd, 2002 09:13:39 PM | OCEANS 11 sucks but....... by mooncake | Jan 2nd, 2002 09:14:21 PM | Is there a planet where 3,000
miles to Las Vegas is a better
mov by CorranHorn | Jan 2nd, 2002 09:31:25 PM | I haven't posted in 2
years, but I just threw up by Spacey | Jan 2nd, 2002 10:03:16 PM | I'm still so distraught
about this article I'm
never com by Spacey | Jan 2nd, 2002 10:09:51 PM | Wow by AsgardTex | Jan 2nd, 2002 10:14:08 PM | Only thing worse then seeing
3000 miles... by JdRavnos | Jan 2nd, 2002 10:55:10 PM | stupid by marlonv | Jan 2nd, 2002 10:57:14 PM | stupid by marlonv | Jan 2nd, 2002 10:59:23 PM | PLEASE say that this is a
joke. by Homer Jay | Jan 2nd, 2002 11:05:36 PM | WORST...LIST...EVER by Homer Jay | Jan 2nd, 2002 11:16:43 PM | I hate to bring back painful
memories of "3000 Miles", but
what by Elgyn6655321 | Jan 3rd, 2002 12:09:15 AM | Harry your old man been taking
his medication? by spidermanfreak20 | Jan 3rd, 2002 12:22:12 AM | Gotta Chime In by Mr.Klaw | Jan 3rd, 2002 12:24:16 AM | Godfather II & Las Vegas by Brother Putney | Jan 3rd, 2002 12:27:22 AM | SWINGERS is the best Vegas
movie ever. by Cash Bailey | Jan 3rd, 2002 01:22:52 AM | PEOPLE!! CHILL OUT!! by spiderblood1969 | Jan 3rd, 2002 01:32:22 AM | I'm with Spacey by shaggy-g | Jan 3rd, 2002 01:38:45 AM | Ocean's 11 vs F.G. - My
First Post EVER by MrFire | Jan 3rd, 2002 01:42:47 AM | Machine Gun McCain by candylegcoat | Jan 3rd, 2002 03:28:58 AM | Hittin' that crack, are
we?? by SLASH0723 | Jan 3rd, 2002 04:32:55 AM | This is the funniest
non-PeteyWheatstraw-affiliated
TB I can rem by Almost Sexy | Jan 3rd, 2002 04:35:20 AM | Jim Morrison - NOT in Machine
Gun McCain by Glenn69 | Jan 3rd, 2002 05:30:32 AM | And these..... by Spacesheik | Jan 3rd, 2002 05:58:56 AM | Ri-Goddamn-Diculous by IHateThisSite | Jan 3rd, 2002 06:52:08 AM | Laughs and laughs...this has
to be a joke....right?
Please? Ha by chiknfriedelfsac | Jan 3rd, 2002 07:47:32 AM | Laughs and laughs...this has
to be a joke....right?
Please? Ha by chiknfriedelfsac | Jan 3rd, 2002 07:51:58 AM | 3000 Miles kicked ass!!!! in a
silly way. by Plissken73 | Jan 3rd, 2002 08:34:22 AM | yes!! Vindication by bluemartini | Jan 3rd, 2002 08:38:41 AM | 3000 Miles kicked ass!!!! in a
silly way. by Plissken73 | Jan 3rd, 2002 08:45:11 AM | 1) Casnio kind of sucked and
2) IHateThisSite guy, are you
Ron W by ItsOver | Jan 3rd, 2002 08:52:14 AM | april 1st isn't for
another 3 months,
dickless..... by thegoldencalf | Jan 3rd, 2002 09:03:55 AM | oh yeah and.... by thegoldencalf | Jan 3rd, 2002 09:15:14 AM | Plisken76 (sorry is that's
wrong) by bluemartini | Jan 3rd, 2002 09:27:37 AM | Um, well, at least it
wasn't a "Lord of the
Rings" article by Uga | Jan 3rd, 2002 10:54:23 AM | Hehehehehe... by wasp | Jan 3rd, 2002 11:26:51 AM | 3000 Miles to Graceland by AutomaticMachine | Jan 3rd, 2002 11:39:59 AM | This Idiot List by Keyser195 | Jan 3rd, 2002 11:42:30 AM | Ah, Father Geek, what a joker
you are... by wasp | Jan 3rd, 2002 11:54:31 AM | What about Cool World? by Redbeard_NV | Jan 3rd, 2002 12:19:41 PM | funny by Juggernaut125 | Jan 3rd, 2002 12:22:33 PM | Are you Crazy???? by Soldier_ | Jan 3rd, 2002 12:38:46 PM | I repeat: THE FREAKIN'
AMAZING COLOSSAL MAN?!?
Madness, I s by Big Dumb Ape | Jan 3rd, 2002 12:57:47 PM | Perdita by VincentSpain | Jan 3rd, 2002 12:59:13 PM | Father Geek by rickrza | Jan 3rd, 2002 01:03:24 PM | I had diarrhea in zero-g by Lardass_Hogan | Jan 3rd, 2002 02:17:02 PM | How can someone drink this
early in the morning? by Obi1Balony | Jan 3rd, 2002 02:20:23 PM | bluemartini - I saw "3000
Miles" and "Freddy Got
Fingered". "30 by Elgyn6655321 | Jan 3rd, 2002 02:32:02 PM | What about Swingers!!! by Halloween68 | Jan 3rd, 2002 02:38:57 PM | One of the funniest talkbacks
ever, and 3000 Miles by Darth TJ Mackey | Jan 3rd, 2002 03:06:37 PM | this is what it has come down
to... by Goose42 | Jan 3rd, 2002 03:42:21 PM | this is what it has come down
to... by Goose42 | Jan 3rd, 2002 03:42:39 PM | What about MUSTANG, the 1970s
brothel documentary? by Electric Tsunami | Jan 3rd, 2002 09:37:10 PM | I quote the Dude...... by Homer Jay | Jan 3rd, 2002 09:38:49 PM | Senility is not kind! by Scatchard | Jan 4th, 2002 10:19:07 AM | Please tell me it's April
1st...or are you trying to
make me by Sloppy Slacks | Jan 4th, 2002 02:28:22 PM | Help my site's been
hijacked by a terrorist
posting horrible by corvette63 | Jan 4th, 2002 08:04:38 PM | The problem with other
people's opinions is by Drath | Jan 5th, 2002 08:33:25 AM | Ass. by KILLAVANILLA | Jan 5th, 2002 10:20:57 PM | SHOWGIRLS?!? Are you out of
your effing mind? by Zippo | Jan 6th, 2002 04:33:36 PM | ain't it a dumbfuckin
review by chow-the-killer | Jan 6th, 2002 09:12:46 PM | ocean's 11 by DEACON DAN | Feb 1st, 2002 09:21:28 PM |
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