Merrick capsized a canoe once; took me hours to find my way to the top…
Is it just me, or does this review pretty-much sum up every movie Wolfgang Petersen’s made since coming to the States? Quite competent, with moments of greatness, but generally bland.
As far as I’m concerned, Petersen hasn’t rocked since DAS BOOT - although many of his films have truly fantastic moments (I even liked the first thirty or forty minutes of TROY – but the rest of the movie felt sloppy, dopey, and meandering).
I don’t know…maybe people like Petersen and John Woo work best when removed from both the pressures and excess of the American studio system; they certainly don’t seem to be at the top of the game within it.
Here’s Derek Wildstar…
I’m giving this flick a wavering thumbs down.
POSEIDON, directed by blockbuster summer movie director Wolfgang Petersen,
is kinda weak, kinda mediocre and kinda so-so. Let me break it down like this (I love lists):
What’s good?
1. The 2 minute "rogue" wave sequence is cool, but you've pretty much seen it already in the trailer.
2. The overall CGI of the cruiseliner, from the opening shot which establishes its size to
the underwater shots throughout the film showing the capsized ship exploding and losing electricity etc.
3. The 4 or 5 "escape sequences" are all pretty tense and well directed, although a few are repetitive.
4. There are some cool deaths, some have impact, others fall short, but overall the goods are delivered.
5. If I had to say that any of the actors "rose above the script with what little they were given"
it would be Kurt Russell (I’m a huge fan) and Josh Lucas. Both did the best they could as alpha males.
Well so far the movie doesn’t sound bad does it? Its not BAD. its just "ho-hum", fairly generic and nothing
anyone will remember 2 minutes after they leave the theater.
Here’s why... here’s what’s bad (or could have been better):
1. The movie is short, like 95 minutes or so. And for a movie this SIZE, there’s certainly no scope.
There was simply not enough character development, pre-wave "weather warnings" or story arch.
Most scenes felt rushed in every way possible. Sometimes a short running time keeps the movie tight and
on point, but in this case it kept POSEIDON from having any build up or tension prior to the wave scene.
2. Character development: um... there’s none. There’s literally 10 minutes before the wave hits!
Now i know what you’re thinking, no one wants to see the crappy introductions anyway, and I agree,
but the cast was barely set up. DAY AFTER TOMMORROW at least TRIED to give us some info about the
people we are supposed to care about.
Here’s what we know:
Richard Dreyfuss: He’s gay, he just got dumped and he's suicidal. I cant tell you anymore about him
because there is nothing more we are told!
Josh Lucas: He was in the Navy once. That’s it, that’s all we ever know. I swear to god the characters are this paper thin.
Kurt Russell: He was a hero once, saved some people and then got elected Mayor of NYC. It was too much for him so he quit.
You know how I know that? Because a drunk Kevin Dilllon (Entourage) tells us that in one sentence during the movie.
No one ever talks about it again.
Emmy Rossum: she’s engaged but hasn’t told her father yet. That’s all we ever know about her.
Emmy Rossum's fiancé has a crushed knee and a massive gash on his knee cap that he gets when the ship flips.
At first he limps, but 3 minutes later he’s running and swimming with kids on his back because "in high school I was
on the swim team". Yeah that’s the extent of his character. This a bland role fleshed out by a bland actor, I don't
know or care who this kid is.
I think you get my drift. There was better character/plot exposition in Aliens Vs. Predator. Now that’s scary.
3. The sets: Much like A Perfect Storm, Wolfgang most likely shot the whole movie in water tanks right on the lot.
The whole movie is indoors from one hull to the next, every corridor is flooded with dead bodies, live electric wires
and burned bodies and hallways from "flash fires". The sets are well done and convincing, but after the SAME look
room after room, its got real boring real quick.
4. You KNOW who’s gonna live or die. I won’t tell you, but as you watch the movie I’m sure you'll guess correctly.
And that’s a shame, A movie like this needs unpredictability (I think I just made that word up). I mean, we've already SEEN
this movie in the 70s, so it would have been nice to have thrown a few curve balls.
Well that’s all I can write for now. The point of this review wasn’t to trash POSEIDON, I’m sure many will dig it and I’m sure
it will be a hit. There are several really good sequences and a few more that are decent, but there are no "themes" to grab
onto and there’s no depth whatsover in the plot or characters. Nothing. At least DAY AFTER TOMMORROW had the global warming angle.
I give POSEIDON a C. It’s average.
You can see POSEIDON in regular theaters (and IMAX!) May 12.
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