I am – Hercules!!
It’s a Fox hourlong, created by writer Hart Hanson (“Judging Amy,” “Joan of Arcadia”), about a “forensic anthropologist” and an FBI agent who team up to solve murders. It stars Emily Deschanel (“Spider-Man 2,” “Boogeyman”), David Boreanaz (“Angel”), Michaela Conlin (“The D.A.”), Jonathan Adams (“American Dreams”) and T.J. Thyne (“Ghost World,” “How High”).
It tells the tale of globe-trotting twentysomething Dr. Temperance Brennan, a best-selling author who knows her way around a handgun, and can beat up enormous men. It’s zippy and fun. The jokes work. The dialogue is smart and cool. There’s a baseball bat. “I don’t know what that means” is uttered often, and always to amusing effect. I never notice sets, but the sets in this show are spectacular, and very hard to miss. Deschanel, who reminds me more of “Rescue Me’s” Diane Farr than her movie-star kid sister Zoe, is fabulous. Even Boreanaz, my least-loved cast member in both “Buffy the Vampire Slayer” and “Angel,” acquits himself ably as the FBI lunkhead outmatched by Dr. Brennan at every turn.
It is the best new network series of the fall.
Hopefully Fox knows this, and will reposition it after “American Idol” when the warble-fest returns in January. Right now it’s in a terrible timeslot: Tuesdays at 8 p.m., when everyone who would appreciate it is watching “Gilmore Girls.”
But what matters Herc’s opinion? The Hollywood Reporter says:
… It's always a risk to build a series on the back of a protagonist who's so unapologetically negative, but the hour hits the ground running with a vibe that's instantly engaging, if not yet quite addictive. While "Bones" has too much "X-Files" and "CSI" going in the pilot to feel completely original, it's nonetheless a taut, well-constructed, character-rich procedural with genuine potential. … The teleplay is flush with snappy dialogue that brings the personalities into sharp focus … Augmenting the straightforward science and darkly comedic tone is some nifty holographic visual effects imagery that's used to attach an identifiable human form to the bare bones of the deceased. It's all pretty cool stuff that's driven on the shoulders of TV's newest cool couple in Deschanel and Boreanaz. They've got some real heat in their partnership that elevates "Bones" above the standard "CSI"-derivative drama as it leaves the starting gate.
Variety says:
… aspires to achieve a mix of "House" and "X-Files" chic (there's even a reference to Scully and Mulder), but for the most part its playful banter feels forced and the way-cool visual flourishes overly familiar. What's left, then, is another crime procedural with a not-especially-fresh twist, which, admittedly, has proved a surprisingly durable skeleton over which to drape new dramas. The series' best wrinkle actually involves the somewhat testy relationship that exists between FBI agent Seeley Booth, played by "Angel" alum David Boreanaz, and the evidence-examining scientists he derisively refers to as "squints," who shouldn't be trusted in the field. …
TV Guide says:
… a first-class and fast-paced procedural, with enjoyable banter and significant sexual tension between the leads … The science, including hologram recreations of the victims, is pretty cool too. …
Entertainment Weekly gives it a B-minus and says:
… Bones is, thankfully, better than its skeleton. (Sorry, couldn't resist.) Deschanel (Boogeyman), with her husky voice and a face from a Victorian locket, has an earthiness that pairs perfectly with Angel's David Boreanaz, playing jovial FBI agent Seeley Booth. Deschanel and Boreanaz banter across D.C. — by car, by foot, by car, and then by foot after an argument — and stir up great pollen clouds of pungent chemistry. If Bones holds up, it'll be because that old Sam-and-Diane, Maddie-and-David, Mulder-and-Scully opposites-attract stuff never feels standard when it's done right.
USA Today gives it three and a half stars (out of four) and says:
… Let other crime shows compete for your attention by growing ever more sick, gory and graphic. Bones is built on a more traditional and solid foundation: the strength of its characters. … Tonight's opening case effectively highlights the characters and spells out their dynamic, while working on its own as a well-constructed mystery. The dialogue is almost always clever, but the show itself isn't glib — it wants us to invest in the victims as well as the criminologists. …
The Palm Beach Post says:
… That Bones doesn't rely on dramatic lighting or sick, twisted crimes to grab an audience is quite refreshing. It's also refreshing that Bones aspires to be more of a probing character drama than a just-the-facts-ma'am, by-the-book endeavor. …
The Milwaukee Journal Sentinel says:
… The writing is smart, the direction is skilled and the supporting cast is fine. Especially good are the likable Boreanaz, the breezy Conlin, who's been seen in a couple of short-lived dramas, and the versatile Adams …
The Newark Star-Ledger says:
… The "Bones" pilot is formulaic but involving … The characters and actors are appealing, particularly Deschanel, who plays Brennan as a socially inept but tough/sexy dame in the "Veronica Mars"/"Crossing Jordan" mold. …
Herc’s rating for “Bones” 1.1?
****
The Hercules T. Strong Rating System:
***** better than we deserve
**** better than most motion pictures
*** actually worth your valuable time
** as horrible as most stuff on TV
* makes you quietly pray for bulletins
8 p.m. Tuesday. Fox.
for just $129.99!! That’s like all 144 hours for – what? – 90 cents per hour!! A better Christmukkah gift is unimaginable!!!
