Hey folks, Harry here... I'm getting so many people asking what the state of my "injury" is, what happened, what is wrong, will I ever walk again... yadda yadda yadda... Well - here is where all you caring, morbidly curious folks get what you want... the gory details...
Geeks tend to get excited about scars, I have to say... I've always been lacking in the scar department... it's been one of my many secret shames. But no longer. Finally - I'll be able to pull off a sock and say - "Behold me arrsome scar!"
How did I get me scar?
Well - I'd like to say I called Tony Jaa a wimp - and went into awesome combat with him. I'd love to say it was Angelina Jolie's fault when she asked for position #122, and snap. I wish it was something dynamic, something cool. But instead - this is so mundane as to be terrifying. This happened doing something I've done at the very least 48,180 times in my life successfully. So - one could say this is a 1 in 50,000 chance injury. Personally, I think the odds are higher than that. But - this happened in taking my pants down... they caught on one ankle... the great fleshy boulder I call a body came down and CUUUUURRRR RAAAACCCKKKKKK POP. It occurred on my way back from Boston. Due to crazy snow beyond imaginning our flight got to Dallas so late that American Airlines had to put me up in Harvey Suites... ugh... Upon getting to my room - I just wanted to sleep - as we had a 5am bus to take back to the airport. It was 12:10am... I could've just kept my pants on... I could have just stayed awake all night. Hell, I could've hooked in my computer and been updating the site for all of you. But no... I wanted to get comfortable and sleep... and for that, GOD broke my leg.
Ok - so what happened to the bones? Well I broke my Fibia and Tibia and tore the ligament that joins the two at the ankle. The Doctor - sliced open my ankle on either side... big ol 9 inch entry wounds, peeled back the meat... put on his tool-time belt and with his Handy Power Screwdriver he drilled six screws into my Tibia attaching a humongus metal plate to the bone. Then, on my Fibia he drilled two screws - one really long one that will help the ligament to grow back naturally. Here's the groovy X-ray
After that - they stapled me back together. I'm under orders to put ZERO weight on the left foot for 6 weeks, that's now 5 weeks and counting. I'm stuck in a nifty wheel chair that is my best friend, and get to be lazier than normal forcing friends and family to push me like Old Man Potter. There's only been a couple of times where Father Geek was pushing me where he went into Tommy Udo giggles, but he seems to have my best interests at heart.
Today - I got the bandages all cut off and finally got to see me wound! This was a highlight for me. Not only that, but they came at my foot with a pair of pincers and started ripping staples out of my swollen, bruised franken-flesh. Everytime she pulled a staple, I imagined the nurse strapped to a wall all Joseph Sarno styled with another nurse whipping her like the swedish wildcat she was would... this caused an involuntary twitch with each staple out.
They're not giving me the plaster cast that I want. Instead I've got this black boot from hell! This thing weighs like 40lbs, and I haven't yet figured out how the gun comes out... but I know there is one... there has to be... this thing is enormous.
Anyway - that's the situation. In 5 weeks I begin to put weight on it, and should be back to normal in about 8 weeks. Alas, I don't think I'll be playing in the Super Bowl. Sigh. Those dreams are behind me, and T.O. is my hero!
Oh yeah - one more thing - I'm not at Geek Headquarters... For the next couple of months, I'm at an apartment that's all nifty wheelchair accessible, wifi'd out and been turned into my own special halfway house. I've got my Mel Gibson Autographed MAD MAX one-sheet - which rules, cuz he's wearing a leg brace! But I've also got my one-sheets for HIGH SCHOOL HELLCATS, CURSE OF THE WEREWOLF, FASTER PUSSYCAT KILL KILL (Auto'd by the babes and Russ), THE BODYGUARD (auto'd by Sonny Chiba - who kicks ass on the poster karate chopping that bull's fucking head open). Then I've got my windowcard for GHOST TOWN, a macquette of one of the creatures, two iMacs, the Funeral Wreath that you Talkbackers gave me, my 1950's Don Post Frankenstein mask, my Mars Attacks full sized Martian, my right hand of doom, Iron Fist bust, Alfred E Newman toy, a very old Talos model, Samurai Jack, Red Death, Vincent Price RAVEN toy, the cyclops, moleman, Rat Fink, Blue Meanie and about 300 dvds I've yet to watch. Then regular cloths, wedge pillow to elevate FrankenFoot and much much more! Also - my contact number has changed, so that new number is where to reach me. Thanks for all the well-wishes!
