Hey folks, Harry here with a look at Kurt Wimmer's followup to the fan cult fave - EQUILIBRIUM, a film that just didn't get to near enough theaters near you or me, for that matter. Now - this movie isn't due out till AUGUST of this year, and is an effects film... so, realize this is one of the first screenings they've had of it, and the film will only be getting better in Kurt's capable hands. Now - I know I'm sure as hell looking forward to this - even if this isn't the best review of a flick - but the reviewer gives it a C- ... and at this stage, there's a lot that Wimmer can do to improve the film... including editing, scoring, reshoots and just basic post-production completion work. There's spoilers below - so read at your own risk... personally - just trust in Kurt - he'll dish out a post-modern badass vampire flick with Milla (pant pant) and we'll eat it up... at least, that's my hopes...
Sup Harry. Heard about your injuries. Ouch! Hope you get better soon. In the downtime, here's a review (pretty sure there's gonna be a few more today) of UltraViolet (not the official name yet, movie was untitled).
Just came back from a screening of this movie. Straight off, I gives it a C-.
Storyline in a nutshell: There's this outbreak of disease that turns people into Vampires. Not Vampires as you'd think. What it does is turn people into (PC term- Hemophages)- gives people irritation if they stay in the sun for too long (apparently this is cured by wearing glasses), makes their bones tougher, makes them a bit stronger, gives them acute hearing, night vision, and your healing is at least 3 times as fast (not quite Wolverine X-Men movie material, but it helps) Downside- You got a 10 year long lifespan from point of infection. That is, only if they get their routine transfusions to keep them from dying sooner.
Needless addition, they have fangs. They don't suck blood at all, but they have fangs. General weaknesses like that are all over the film.
Cut a few years into the future. We find out the vampiyaz are all adidas wearing, eurotrash wannabees, with the usual dreadlocked funke' Blade inspired hairstyles and a-holeness.
The vampires want to kill humans, humans want to quarantine the vampires. Naturally, that means kill them off.
So you've got these badass looking Killzone Helghan (ps2 game killzone) lookin' guards around this big arse building (movie opening)- then these planes drop these spheres out, bomber style. The spheres blast through the building, and transform into badass ninjas with a similar getup, only, think SnakeEyes from GI Joe. After a badass action scene, the scene follows a pair of generic overthetop actors explaining why the ninjas were there. Something like, ...
"What were they doing here?"
"They didn't take any of the blood."
"Maybe they didn't want to take any of it. Maybe they wanted to infect it."
"Damn Vampires..."
"Hey, don't call them that. They're Hemophages."
Who gives a bleepin' bleep? They're your enemy, you ain't gonna be PC about it.
So the writing really isn't all that good, and Equilibrium kicks this movies ass in that area.
Afterwards (that opening scene has nothing to do with the rest of the movie and was put in there for show. A nice show, I give it that), we cut to Mila's character, Violet, entering a facility and being asked for ID at the gate, by more badass lookin' guards. Mila goes in, apparently she's a merc of some sort, and she's been contracted to deliver a case of "Hey, don't look inside it! just deliver the effin' thing!", and she's off. Something goes wrong - we find out she's an imposter when the real merc shows up at the gates. Big awesome battle scenes, very close to Equilibrium and it seems to have gotten more kicks from the audience than the folks who watched Equi' in theatres. You probably guessed it by now. Violet's a hemophage.
Anyway, she gets the case, escapes with it, and looks inside.
She later delivers the case to her vampire homeboys. She tells them she looked inside. She asks what the hell is a boy doing in there. Vampire generic boss with french accent replies, "He's loaded with anti vampire badness. If he is atomized, his molecules will spread out and seek us. It'll kill us all!"
Then boss guy tries to off the kid - Violet interupts
"But he's just a kid!" Boss guy replies "This is what we are, humans are our enemies; blah blah blah, we kill 'em!"
"But he may have a cure! His antigens could be"
"Shut up, we're like, evil and stuff!"
- BLAM! -kid's a hologram. Meanwhile Violet is hightailing it with the real kid.
Apparently she has more sense and brains than the boss guy. Boss Guy is overly irrational as is, so we believe her angle pretty much from the get go.
Now she's stuck, can't ally with humans, and just pissed off vampire boss guy. Can she find a cure with this strange child? Will the boss guy hunt her down before the humans can reclaim their project? Find out this Summer (maybe) in, "untitled movie"!
Still think it's gonna be called Ultra Violet.
So that's basically the point of the movie, to see if Violet can cure herself. This takes place in the first 20-something minutes of the movie, and sets up the rest of the film.
The movie plays out, and when it's over, you find yourself wondering why the hell the vampire issue had to be in the movie. It felt so needless, especially the sharp teeth. It totally gives you the wrong impression going in, and you're left with a movie that isn't as thoroughly fleshed out in its own world (the vamps use gadgets more than any tough abilities you'd think a 'vampire' would use- except for Mila, who's the hero. Go fig') , and is left upon the laurels of the cool action scenes. As is, the movie was nearly completed, save for many CG effects that were basic models without textures and the like. Music was taken from the Matrix, seemed pretty temp. Aside from that, the action scenes are freaking awesome. The Grammaton Cleric 'reticle' flash on the gun muzzle is back, and at one point, it's purple. There's a whole bunch of cool tech concepts. At one point, Violet puts some change into a machine, which spits out two flimsy pieces of paper. Put together, it resembles the innards, and works as a cell phone.
The badass ninjas and gas-mask wearing guards were pretty cool. The gunfights and anti-gravity scenes were pretty something new (driving on the side of a building with a moto' for one), and Mila really carries the character this time. She does her fair share of acting and ass kicking; it's not about guns and one liners with Violet, A-La Alice in Res' Evil (though she was given one liners). It seems to fit better here though.
Anyway, i'm putting this up as a warning. Plot and execution dialogue wise, blows. I get overly critical with things like this, because I hate it when you know something that had potential goes completely in the other direction.
(Why Uwe Boll is my mortal enemy)
Kurt needs to get a better writer. As is, all this movie has going for it is badass action. But a lot of people don't go to movies for just action, even as badass as this.
Think Matrix: Reloaded only without the expecations created by having to live up to the first movie.
If you plan on seeing this movie, dumb yourself down, and you might be able to forget it in time as a yummy piece of eye candy.
Personally, i've never read the comic (didn't even know it was based on one until the intro), so I can't tell you how true to it this film is. Since the rest of the film seems to only have action scenes going for it, no fun in spoiling what's left to have fun watching, if anyone still plans on checking it out.
If you decide to use this, call me Susanowo.
