Ahoy, squirts! Quint here with an early look at OCEAN'S 12 from a test screening in the NRG Mecca of Scottsdale, AZ. This one ain't too positive, but I seem to differ a bit from the below reviewer's opinion (like how I about busted a gut laughing at Ron Burgandy's dog, etc), but having said that... I wasn't the world's biggest fan of the last flick. It read real great on paper, but lost a little on the translation, in my opinion. It was great to see Clooney dominating every frame as usual and I love me my Bernie Mac, but on the whole I just didn't feel much one way or the other about the film... Very much like I feel now about the sequel. I hope it's fun, but only time will tell. Anyway, on with the review!!!

Hiya Harry,

Longtime lurker, etc etc.....

Last night I had an opportunity to see the "First Screening to an audience" of Oceans 12 here in Scottsdale AZ at the Harkins Cinema Capri.  According to the PR group the print they showed was about 98% complete, however it was played in Stereo, some of the dialogue was muted and a 15-20 second voice over was missing.   

To start with, what a complete waste of a cast.   The original "11" are all back, with the addition of Julia Roberts now making the total to 12.   Obviously with 12 stars sharing the screen, each character is going to get limited face time.   However, what they did with this cast was atrocious.   Bernie Mac - gets a total of 2 or 3 lines.   Andy Garcia?  Shows up to get his money back with his best menacing face in the first 5 minutes, then completely disappears for the rest of the movie.  Matt Damon plays his character for laughs this time as the young guy learning the ropes, the rookie so to speak.    Brad Pitt is still eating his way through scenes, but he and Clooney's witty repartee mostly falls flat this time.

Spoilers -

The major problems with the film are Catherine Zeta Jones, Julia Roberts, the staging of the robberies and the Editing

Jones's character just happens to be THE GREATEST DETECTIVE OF ALL TIME, instantly deducing a crime scene beyond anyone's reasonable ability.   In their first heist the Oceans 11 crew raises a apartment building a few inches on hydraulic jacks so they can create the only shot that will work for the rappelling line.   After walking into the crime scene for the first time she announces "you'll find the building has been raised, and that the "black fox" was even here first.   It is just a completely ridiculous jump in logic.     Plus, she probably get the most screen time, looking hot mind you, but her character is just not interesting.  

Julia Roberts looks awful,.  Throughout her brief screen time, she is shot without any makeup.   It's not really a pretty sight.   For a movie icon and superstar, it becomes really disconcerting when Clooney kisses her, as a Julia without makeup kissing a superstar Clooney doesn't add up.  Additionally, in the last heist, Julia Roberts - get this -  plays JULIA ROBERTS the IRL movie star to distract the security at the museum.  WINK WINK, very cute, and completely lacking in inspiration.  A lot of sighs were heard in the theatre as it didn't play very well.   About as well as Will Ferrell talking to his subtitled dog in Anchorman.

Soderberg has pulled every editing tool out of his belt, and often the rapid cut scenes and set up are nausea inducing as opposed to "Rat Pack Cool". 

On a last note, the original Oceans 11 heist seemed reasonable in its execution - which I like and admire about all great "theft" movies.  All of the thefts and robberies in this one are just beyond belief - including a 007 hologram Faberge egg.  Just not possible. 

Anyway, 1 bronsky out of 5, call me the HEADHUNTER