Hi, everyone. "Moriarty" here with some Rumblings From The Lab...
Even a quick one is a good one when it’s the @$$Holes. Sorry it’s a few days late, but I just got back from vacation, and couldn’t post it until now...
Hey @$$holes, Village Idiot here.
Short but sweet column this week. Let's see what we've got:
* Comedian finally weighs in on the "Scarlett versus Lady Jane" debate in his review of G.I. JOE RELOADED.
* Ambush Bug wraps up and puts a bow on the AVENGERS/JLA mini-series.
* I shamelessly pad my LEGION review with a discussion of the book's potentially gay content.
* The Comedian comes back with a Cheap Shot to let us know what was wrong with ULTIMATES #13, and uses the tough love necessary in such situations.
And there's more too. Here, have a look at the contents:
Table of Contents
(Click title to go directly to the review)
G.I. JOE RELOADED #1
AVENGERS/JLA #4
THE LEGION #31
BATMAN & POISON IVY: CAST SHADOWS
Cheap Shots
G.I. JOE RELOADED #1
Written by John Ney Reiber
Pencils by Eddy Barrows & Javier Saltares
Published by Devils Due
Reviewed by The Comedian
Some Hama purists and cynics have already begun writing this "Ultimate G.I. Joe" series off as a hackneyed unoriginal post-9/11 cash in of their beloved franchise. No doubt this book is partially inspired by our current war on terror but only as a context for a fairly entertaining bare bones spin on the classic Joe team. The only problem I have with this issue on it's own merit is that it's really #2 since it picks up directly from G.I. JOE REBORN. Number ones are supposed to the quintessential "jumping on point". Anyone who didn't pick up COBRA REBORN or G.I. JOE REBORN would be pretty lost with this puppy and since it's not as engaging as either of those books that's not necessarily a good thing. So here's the short version for those of you who need to play catch up.
G.I. RELOADED #1 finds a recently formed "so secret they're not even know about by top military brass" team of bad asses on a steak out of a top secret mountain base where a super stealthy remote control warplane has just been hijacked by Cobra, a terrorist group that's pretty much the TURNER DIARIES set, the Jihad crowd, arms dealers and a bunch of hired creeps all rolled into one twisted army under the leader ship of Cobra Commander; a deluded demagogue who sees himself as America's greatest patriot.
In the course of a week Cobra's blown up the Golden Gate Bridge, stolen a deadly virus, spread it through parts of Atlanta, threatened the President by phone and taken over the national airwaves. In response a maverick Colonel nicknamed Hawk has assembled a special ops team of "Joes" to deal with this threat proactively "while the bureaucrats fumble around in panic." This team is so secret at this point that all their service records have been changed to read that they've been dishonorably discharged or killed in action. Scarlett, Duke, Doc (who's now a chick), Stalker, Beachhead, Roadblock and Rock & Roll have all been born-again hard to take down Cobra. Roadblock and Rock & Roll have infiltrated the Cobra militia unit overseeing the hijacking while the rest of the team sits on the other side of the mountain doing surveillance. Once they regroup with Roadblock and Rock & Roll they attempt to take Major Bludd back for questioning. Then Snake Eyes comes out of nowhere, kicks & saves all their asses simultaneously and goes back with them in their secret hanger to watch a college football game.
Yeah, that last sentence was a WTF moment for me too. The whole bit with Snake Eyes is the one thing that took me out of the "reality" they're trying to stamp on here. I just don't see this Special Ops A-List who've flushed their lives and military careers in the toilet for the sake of a mission letting this masked freak into their ranks so easy. I know that they're going for classic Snake Eyes here and he's obviously the star of this book. I just hope they break with tradition and not keep him a complete mystery. I don't think 50 issues of "enigmatic mysterious guy who doesn't talk" will pan out as well as it did for Hama. It would be the comic book equivalent of Fonzie. Come to think of it the idea that the best the government is willing to do is put together this little small rag tag band of underdogs to fight this mounting terrorist juggernaut doesn't ring as very realistic either but it does make a good story devise. I'd rather root for this "little team that could" than the endless cavalcade of guys with dopey helmets, goofy codenames and a carte blanche expenditure of weapons and technology that we all remember fondly from our childhood, as long as they keep Lady Jane around anyhow. I always thought she was 10 times hotter than Scarlett when I was a little kid. Probably has to do with that episode where her and Flint sang The Marine Corp Anthem as they blew up a Cobra base.
AVENGERS/JLA #4
Writer: Kurt Busiek
Artist: George Perez
Publisher: Marvel/DC Comics
Reviewer: Ambush Bug
Last week, the subject of how we all fell into comics as kids was brought up in the Talkbacks. I said that CONTEST OF THE CHAMPIONS, MARVEL UNIVERSE, and SECRET WARS were directly responsible for introducing me to this medium that I have dropped so much coin upon. The one thing that those comics had in common was that they featured just about every character in the Marvel Universe. It gave me a snippet of how cool the characters were. It teased me and tempted me to seek out the titles with which the characters starred. I wanted to learn more about these characters and a fanboy was soon born. If I were a kid now, searching for a hobby to get dive into and enjoy, I think AVENGERS/JLA would be the comic to make me fall in love with comics all over again.
We @$$holes gave this miniseries quite a lathering when the first issue came out . We swore up and down that this comic was a reward for those of us who have been buying comics for more than half our lives. It held excitement, fanboy coolness, and spectacular art between its cardstock covers. We ate it up and asked for seconds. Busiek spent a lot of time distinguishing the Marvel Universe from its DC counterpart in issue #1. It wasn't until issue two, though, that the Avengers and the JLA met in a battle that shook all of fandom. We saw Thor take on Superman. We saw Green Arrow crack wise with Hawkeye. Cap vs. Bats. She Hulk vs. Wonder Woman. Ant Man vs. the Atom. All of the "What If?" fanfic creamings that had been splattered across the message boards of comic book websites throughout the years had finally came to fruition. Of course, in the end, following every comic book team-up cliché, the two teams settled their differences in order to take on the real villain.
When issue #3 came around, fans were pumped to see the two teams utilize their varied powers to take on this menace, but instead they got a book of filler, simply biding it's time for the big battle which was to take place in the final issue. Those of us who had been bitching about drawn out stories to fit a meaty trade had the perfect example in our hands. In this issue, we were given a bevy of alternate reality pinup pages that ultimately resulted in a big bunch of jack squat happening. Sure the art still looked pretty, but the series had officially skidded to a halt, slaughtering all momentum that was built in the first two issues of the series.
Upon going into issue #4, I immediately noticed that Busiek was back on track. Sure there still was a lot of alternate reality montage sequences and cosmic mumbo jumbo, but they way Busiek framed it was believable to me. As I flipped through this book, I started to see this series for what it was: a celebration of the greatest characters of two of the biggest super hero universes in comics for the fans who have loved them throughout the years. Fans of the ULTIMATES, this book isn't for you. Fans of the AUTHORITY, move on. Fans of Bendis' costume-less DD, this probably ain't your thang. But for those of you who were there during the CRISIS, during the replacement Cap years, during the Korvac Saga, during the Judas Contract; this book is for you. For those of you who followed the New Warriors and the Teen Titans, the Guardians of the Galaxy and the JLE, the West Coast Avengers and the Outsiders; this book is for you. For anyone who has bought comics for longer than the last five years and miss the days when spandex was cool and it was okay to have action in your comics, this book is for you. With so many books out there reaching to snag the interest of new readers, it is refreshing to see a book embrace the fans that made these characters the icons that they are today.
The book isn't perfect. The dialog is over the top, but it is the type of dialog you've come to expect to hear these characters shout in the field of battle. I think we've become jaded to the over-the top-ness of these characters in this self-referential, deconstructionistic age of comics. It seems that any time old school sensibilities are applied to comics these days, they are met with disdain. Some may cry "LAME!" while reading the heavy dialog that is scattered about this book, but I was filled with fanboy glee as these characters interacted with one another and acted as one team for the first time in comics history.
The first half of this book is littered with spot on character moments involving this massive cast. Thor and Aquaman debate about the fight Thor had with Superman and who would win and why. Vision and Scarlett Witch talk about their lost children as Hank Pym and the Wasp reflect on their marriage. Hal Jordan and Barry Allen talk of the importance of legacy and sacrifice. Captain America and Superman talk of hope and the battle ahead. These moments are extremely well written and provide a nice calm before the battle that takes place in the second half of the book.
And when the battle comes, whoa nelly! Busiek and Perez reach into their bag of tricks and turn it inside out. Every character that ever breathed the word JLA or Avenger takes part in a battle to beat all battles. As realities shift, every incarnation of the two teams play a part, as does every villain they have ever faced. The last half of the book is a monumental collage of the best heroes and villains in the last sixty years of comicdom. It is a celebration of continuity, history, and coolness. Every panel is filled with so much detail you would have to go over each one with a magnifying glass to fully appreciate it. George Perez has outdone himself in this issue. Weird noses or not, he is the best artist in comics today. This issue has set an artistic highmark in attention to detail and filling the panel to its maximum potential. Truly phenomenal.
This is the kind of book that makes me proud to be a fanboy. I'm glad I can leaf through this book and name almost every character and remember almost every incarnation of every team and almost every villain they've ever faced. If I were that ten year old boy looking at comics for the first time, this would be the book I would want to pick up to introduce me to the fantastic world of comics. Of course, with a $5.95 American price tag, I doubt any youngster will drop coin to pick this up. But like CONTEST OF CHAMPIONS, SECRET WARS, and MARVEL UNIVERSE before it, this book offers a glimpse at what makes these two comic book companies the best out there today. It is chock-filled with costumed heroism, respect for continuity, and action, Action, ACTION! If only this book were representative of comics today.
THE LEGION #31
Written by Dan Abnett and Andy Lanning
Art by Keith Giffen and Al Milgrom
Published by DC Comics
Reviewed by Village Idiot
One of the more curious phenomena I've noticed to come down the fandom pike these past few years is the discussion of homosexual revisionism of certain comic book characters; where the speculation or argument is put forward that any particular character is really gay. This stands to reason: comics and arguably all of heroic fiction play to some degree on indentification, and often, as much as we want to be like our heroes, we also want our heroes to seem like us. I can imagine that gay comic fans would naturally be looking for that kind of representation and validation; to take that representation from a character of long-standing can add to the power of the validation. But often these speculations and arguments are met with resistance from other comic fans; some who object to the revisionism, others who object to homosexuality, or some combination of both. And the discussions go round and round on message boards throughout cyberspace, with more nuance and insight than I can hope to bring to the brief mention of the situation here.
I bring this up because there's a good chance that THE LEGION is flirting with this issue. Not out and out embracing it, like RAWHIDE KID, but something more akin to "coding" -- dancing around it in such a way to where it flies over my head, but lands on the radar of the people who know what to look for. In fact, the only reason why I know about it is because of reading a discussion like the kind mentioned in the paragraph above.
I also bring it up because this might be the most notable part of LEGION #31, a fairly routine comedic turn that I just didn't find all that funny. Amusing? Sure. Funny? Not really. Worth the trouble? Probably not.
The story takes place right after the recent Darkseid storyarc, and the responsibility to clean up the subsequent destruction to the massive "Legion World" space station falls to the tech guys Gear and Chuck Taine (the pre-Crisis Bouncing Boy). To expedite matters, Chuck and Gear sneak into Brainiac's lab to borrow his nanites and reprogram them to do all the cleaning. The nanites go out of control, cleaning the station of all organic life, and Gear, Chuck and Superboy, all doofuses, chase the errant nanites throughout the station.
I think Abnett and Lanning may have been shooting for a GHOSTBUSTERS-type vibe with the story, a irreverent romp through the station by the three numbskulls, anxious to avert disaster, and really anxious to avert being blamed. But Chuck and Gear as protagonists never made the contact with me that was needed for me to really invest in their predicament, and whatever punch was intended with the situations simply didn't land. Add the fact that Keith Giffen's rougher art was a bit of a jarring switch from Chris Batista's cleaner work, and I found the book to be a somewhat uncomfortable read. It just didn't work for me.
In the end story, Brainiac, furious that his nanites were stolen is left even more furious by the note left by the thieves in his lab, which he reads:
"Dear Brainy, You don't say anything about the missing nanites, and we don't say anything about your private [risqué] holo-collection featuring Dreamer, Spark, Andromeda, In-"
Since Dreamer, Spark, and Andromeda are all women, and the holo-image in the panel was of a woman, that's as far as I took it. But speculation has it that the "In-" was perhaps "Invisible Kid," Brainiac's pal, and the guy who, in his enthusiasm, he kissed on the cheek at the end of the last adventure. On the other hand, other Legion fans have argued that it could be another female character like "Inferno." In any case, Abnett and Lanning have created a Rorshack situation for the Brainy, where the fans can see what they want to see. Both sides will be clamoring for something more definitive, and I can see how ambiguity might get annoying after a while, like a joke that's gone on too long. On the other hand, Abnett and Lanning may have found a clever way to handle the issue for the time being. Word has it that Mark Waid will be taking over the title soon. Time will tell if this is a ball he'll run with.
BATMAN & POISON IVY: CAST SHADOWS
Written by Ann Nocenti
Art by John Van Fleet
Published by DC Comics
Reviewed by Ambush Bug
Ann Nocenti has always been one of my favorite writers. She was the writer without fear, taking the ominous task of writing the adventures of Matt Murdoch after Frank Miller ended his classic DAREDEVIL run. I was just getting into comics when Nocenti took over DD. Sporting art by John Romita Jr., her run still brings back warm memories of my first days as a fanboy. DD was one of the books that got me hooked on this literary crack we call comics and Nocenti was a big part of the formation of that addiction. But when Nocenti ended her run on DD, she fell off my radar and I'm ashamed to say, I haven't read much of her work since. When I heard that Nocenti was going to be writing a Batman special, I knew I had to pick it up and see what my old friend was up to.
In BATMAN & POISON IVY: CAST SHADOWS, a billionaire industrialist decides to build a tower in the middle of Gotham City. This tower is to be Gotham's tallest skyscraper, pointing towards the heavens and casting a dark shadow across a city that has too many shadows already. In the opening moments of this book, we see the construction of this monolith and its effects on the inhabitants of Gotham. The shadow stretches across homes and rooftops and finally reaches the haunted halls of Arkham Asylum where one Poison Ivy resides. The skyscraper is blocking out Ivy's sunlight and this does not make the femme fatale happy. This is the setup for a truly entertaining noir-ish tale of twisted love.
Nocenti is back and true to form in this special one shot. There was always a poetry to Nocenti's words; a delicate-ness that brought out the beauty in the most bizarre of circumstances. The story reminds me of the serpentine relationship Nocenti wrote for Daredevil and Typhoid Mary all of those years ago. Batman is cast as the tormented man, tempted by the girl who just can't help herself from being bad, Poison Ivy. Nocenti paints both characters as tragic. For the first time, I actually felt for Ivy. Her doctor at Arkham points out that she has killed everyone she has ever tried to get close to. Nocenti highlights the loneliness this toxic character feels and her desperate grasp on what little life she has left to cherish through inner monologue and her dialog with Batman in the end.
The story starts out slow and chunky. The dialog in the initial session between Poison Ivy and her doctor which sets up the entire story is awkward and ineffective, but Nocenti soon gains momentum at the halfway point of the book. When Batman becomes poisoned and must seek out Poison Ivy to get the cure, the story really begins to roll. There is something that is just plain cool about having our hero say a line like "I have two hours to find Poison Ivy and kiss her." It's the kind of fun setup that automatically gets your attention. And you can tell it got Nocenti's attention too, because the book really picks up at this point and becomes much more interesting. Nocenti delves into the loneliness both the hero and the villainess feels. There is a great exchange between Batman and Ivy on the roof of the tower where Ivy struggles with her good and bad sides, resulting in a truly dramatic conclusion.
John Van Fleet makes his art in a photo-realistic style. I've come down pretty hard on Alex Maleev in the past for his attempts at photo-realism in DAREDEVIL. Does that mean that I hate photo-realism in comics? Hell, no. Maleev's art is static and dull, relying on pitch black darks to cover up how amateurish his work really is. Van Fleet does no such thing. He may use photo referencing, but his poses are dynamic. The heroes in costume don't look ridiculous. His art is able to capture the fantastic, yet give it a foothold in reality that makes the story seem heavier, more poignant. Van Fleet uses computer imagery to highlight sparkles of light and movement. He shades his characters in varying hues, highlighting the mood of the scene and the expressions on his characters faces. Van Fleet fills his panels with details. It looks as if he spends hours constructing the proper shades and textures for each and every square. Maleev's art looks as if he spent twenty five cents and five minutes at a copy machine. Want to see the difference between good and bad photo referencing? Look at this book beside a copy of the latest DAREDEVIL.
Some writers have the ability to put one word next to another and make them sound beautiful Ann Nocenti is one such writer. Despite its faults, I'm recommending CASTING SHADOWS. Nocenti likes to torment her characters, and she surely does that in this book, but the ending of this book brought a smile to my face. Actually, the entire book did. It may not be the best BATMAN Special I have read in a while due to its slow start, but the second half reminded me why I love Nocenti's work so much. Nocenti writes powerful characters. She comes up with imaginative ways to intertwine those characters and the payoff is always satisfying. Check out CAST SHADOWS if you want to read a strong noirish jaunt into torment, mystery, and redemption.
Cheap Shots!
SAM JACKSON & THE AVENJERKS #13 (aka ULTIMATES #13) - Anybody else think Joe Q is cracking the whip on Hitch because even he now sees that it's not worth all the late dates for this garbage. Man, while I was reading it I kept thinking, "wow 2 1/2 years, two lame Hulk fights." It actually feels more out of touch and dated than Nu-Marvel zombies would have you believe AVENGERS/JLA was.
With SUPREME POWER out now, this book feels almost completely obsolete. As overrated and nihilistic as THE AUTHORITY was in its heyday, that book is still miles above this junk. Hell, that INVADERS relaunch with the "other" Captain America will probably be better than this crap. If this is the "big budget Wide screen Avengers Movie" then who the hell is it for? Maybe this is what Mark Millar thinks the Bruckheimer experience is all about. Maybe it's a satire of those movies. I'm being so hard because I think Millar has shown that he can rise above this lowest common denominator bullshit, in the pages of this very book even. There were scenes during the run of this book with Iron Man, and even one or two with that asshole he's trying to pass off as Captain America, that were genuine examples of layered characterization. Instead for a finale we get "Hulk Straight!" Hopefully he'll take a page from Ennis and grow the fuck up on his next pass at this. - The Comedian
JLA #95 - I really wanted to like the John Byrne/Chris Clairmont run on JLA, honest. And on paper, it sounds pretty good, at least to my ears anyway: Byrne and Clairmont, two of the masters of comic craft and the creators of one of the most legendary runs in comic history, team-up to work on perhaps the greatest superhero team of all time. And what do we get? Overused, overly dense expository thought balloons, the most blatant, unuanced characterization you're liable to find this side of 1985, and a 19th century mincing fop of a vampire named Crucifer. The classic Doom Patrol are around to help out, but I'm sorry, Crucifer has all the menace of Andy Dick, and the fact that it might somehow take two superhero teams to effectively deal with him seems like it would be an insult to the average 9 year old. Still though, the art, inked by Jerry Ordway, is pretty spiffy, and Batman getting shot at point-blank range right at the end in a bit of a cliffhanger. But is that enough? I'd suggest buying the issue for the camp value, but the writing is so dense, even that's a toughie. - Village Idiot
SUPERMAN #203 - The Kandor story wrapped suitably enough, although the "Jim Lee Sketchbook" back-up was kinda thin on plot. If you like pretty Image Comics-like artwork on your Superman, and the upcoming Jim Lee stuff isn't enough satisfy your appetite, check out the whole storyline in the upcoming GODFALL tpb. Depending on where you live, back issues of this one may be a little hard, and expensive, to come by.
(Click title to go directly to the review)
G.I. JOE RELOADED #1
AVENGERS/JLA #4
THE LEGION #31
BATMAN & POISON IVY: CAST SHADOWS
Cheap Shots
Written by John Ney Reiber
Pencils by Eddy Barrows & Javier Saltares
Published by Devils Due
Reviewed by The Comedian
Writer: Kurt Busiek
Artist: George Perez
Publisher: Marvel/DC Comics
Reviewer: Ambush Bug
Written by Dan Abnett and Andy Lanning
Art by Keith Giffen and Al Milgrom
Published by DC Comics
Reviewed by Village Idiot
Written by Ann Nocenti
Art by John Van Fleet
Published by DC Comics
Reviewed by Ambush Bug
