Star Trek: Enterprise 3.11 FAQ

What’s it called?

“Carpenter Street.”

Who’s responsible?

Teleplay is credited to series creators Rick Berman and Brannon Braga (“The Expanse,” “The Xindi”).

What does TV Guide say?

“Acting on a tip from Daniels (Matt Winston), Archer and T'Pol time-travel to the year 2004, where the Xindi are using an abandoned Detroit factory to build a secret weapon. Loomis: Leland Orser.”

Any sign of FutureGuy?

Not this week.

The Xindi decide 2004 Earth is the place to build a secret weapon?

“Daniels said they might be hiding from someone,” Archer explains to T’Pol. “The past seems like a pretty good place to hide.”

From which era do the treacherous Xindi hail?

Archer’s, one gathers.

Are they the fishy Xindi, or one of their non-CGI brethen?

Reptilian Xindi, we’re saddened to report. Putting the icthixindi center stage this week would have given the episode a unique charge, but it was not to be.

T’Pol goes back to 2004? Is she still yammering on about the Vulcan science diretorate and how “time travel is impossible”?

“I think all your doubts about time travel are about to go out the window,” Archer tells T’Pol before the leap. “Forgive me if I'm not entirely convinced,” T’Pol tells Archer a moment after she sets foot on 21st century terra firma.

The big news?

There is none, and that’s a problem. Fans are likely to react to “Carpenter Street” with a collective shrug, disappointed that nothing of consequence is changed, learned or advanced. A rare time-hopping mission engineered by Daniels might have presented an opportunity to further our understanding of the Xindi’s role in the temporal cold war – or something. Instead, our big thrill is watching T’Pol roughing up some Hummer-era lowlife.

What’s TV Guide not telling us?

Remember how, toward the end of the “Deep Space Nine,” trips to the “Mirror Mirror” universe grew almost disconcertingly routine? That’s pretty much how “Enterprise” is treating commutes to far-flung eras these days.

What’s good?

T’Pol and Archer navigating the fast-food drive-in window from a beat-up pickup truck. And I kinda liked the bit with Archer ordering T’Pol to untie their suspect.

What’s not so good?

The episode is essentially an excuse for T’Pol and Archer to navigate the fast-food drive-in window in a beat-up pickup truck. It’s a vaguely amusing scene, but in no danger of making anyone forget about Kirk and Spock in the blonde marine biologist’s beat-up pickup truck. Also, using something as powerful as time travel to examine eight varieties of ordinary humans has got to be the goofiest way ever devised to defeat the earthling menace.

How does it end, spoiler-boy?

“Yeah, ray guns. Got it. Watch your head.”

Herc’s rating for “Enterprise” 3.11?

**1/2

The Hercules T. Strong Rating System:

• ***** better than we deserve
• **** better than most motion pictures
• *** actually worth your valuable time
• ** as horrible as most stuff on TV
• * makes you quietly pray for bulletins

8 p.m. Wednesday. UPN.

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