I am – Hercules!!

Some like this one. Others? Not so much.

“First off, I didn't like this episode as much as the last few. It felt superficial somehow - it has a lot more ass-kicking and twisty action bits, but they seem to be about manufactured problems,” says “Limber.”

“Despite some good flourishes, this episode never gets above average,” offers “DrunkStan.” “The standard policy of making the antagonists of the show as “hissable” as possible works very well here,” notes “Charlie & Tex.”

“Seems to be the beginning of one of those Farscape two/three parters that are better than most of the action/drama movies on the big screen,” opines “Altoids Girl.”

“This is the kind of episode that has given Farscape the reputation as the best Sci-Fi on television. It’s also what we’ve been missing just about all season,” contends “Mr. Sinister.”

4. “Mr. Sinister”:

Farscape 4.19 FAQ

What's it called?

"We're So Screwed, Part 1: Fetal Attraction"

I love the catchy titles!

Me too.

What does TV Guide say?

"The Moya crew visits a Scarran border station to uncover Aeryn's whereabouts and mounts a rescue operation."

Hmmm, that sounds a lot like another episode where the crew has to infiltrate a Peace Keeper hideout to save Aeryn...

Yes, but I assure you, they are completely different!

Any former cast members?

Nope.

Grayza? Braka?

Nope.

Do we finally see Katratzi?

No, the entire episode takes places on a quarantine station where all ships must stop for five days before going to Katratzi.

Hey! Maybe the ship holding Aeryn is at this station!?!

That would be really convenient. The ship holding Aeryn has already been there for five days and is ready to set sail in half an arn.

So the crew mounts a daring rescue mission, shooting their way through hundreds of soldiers?

Not exactly, they do concoct another wild and crazy plan that only John Chrichton could pull off. This is Farscape at its best.

What does the plan involve?

Projectile vomiting that would make Linda Blair cringe.

Anything big?

There may be some development between D’argo and Chiana. It also seems that at least one of the main cast members has a terrible secret.

The good?

Just about everything. Even the regulars that I often find annoying are pure genius. This is the kind of episode that has given Farscape the reputation as the best Sci-Fi on television. It’s also what we’ve been missing just about all season.

The bad?

Scarran half-breeds must be common, because the Scarran doesn't blink an eye when seeing Scorpy. And, yet again, the people whose entire mission in life is to hunt Moya's crew have NO IDEA what they look like, allowing John and company to walk around like they're nobody. Don't they have mug shoots?

How does it end?

Invisio text on! Harvey comes back!

Next episode?

Farscape: We're So Screwed, Part 2: Hot to Katratzi

Mr. Sinister’s rating for “Farscape” 4.19?

****1/2

The Hercules T. Strong Rating System:

• ***** better than we deserve
• **** better than most motion pictures
• *** actually worth your valuable time
• ** as horrible as most stuff on TV
• * makes you quietly pray for bulletins

3. “Altoids Girl”:

It's kind of long so, um, oops?

4x19- Fetal Attraction (hardy har har)

Altoid's Girl here again, with an overview of the latest Farscape. John is once again in Peacekeeper leathers but this time its Scorpy at his side rather than Chiana. Sikuzo has gone ahead to act as a diplomat and it is up to Crichton and John act as Scarren Spies returning back to report. They land on a space station staffed with Kalisha, the same species as Sikuzo. Apperantly the Kalisha belong to the Scarren empire. Sikuzo has found out that Aeryn is nearby, on the Scarren frighter heading to Katratzi in half an arn (half an hour).

The station’s robotic sentinels (?) are programmed to shoot to kill anyone carrying weapons, so they must come up with a plan to keep the freighter on the station until they figure out a plan. Rygel thinks the best plan is to eat. Sad thing is, he's being serious. After a muppet-projectile-vomit (yay!) Rygel claims to be suffering from a highly contagious disease, causing the station to be locked down until further notice, effectively keeping the freighter docked. Sikuzo recommends by way of the officer she's romancing, that maybe they should put out a call for doctors that may be in the area.

Noranti and D'Argo pretend to be doctors who just happen to be in the area to effectively stalling for time. Unfortunately the disease that Rygel is pretending to have has outward signs that forces Noranti to get creative to keep up the farce: She actually infects Rygel with the said highly contagious disease that's lethal to humans, Scarrens, various other aliens including Sebacean. Now everyone is potentially infected and now Noranti has to actually find a cure.

Chiana, being her usual friendly self, is quickly become friendly with others onboard, much to D'Argo's chagrin. Since he's not supposed to know Chiana, he pretends to hit on her, and there's a touching, much-missed scene between the two.

John, frustrated with the inaction, decides to take matters into his own hands by hitting on the Sebacean nurse that is torturing Aeryn. He pretends to have a cure for the disease if she promises to "do" him later. It's disturbing to say the least. But he gets on the ship to rescue a drugged, hallucinating Aeryn. She doesn't believe it’s really him, and the one time it is, he is quickly captured. Scorpy manages to free John, claiming that John was just "horny" looking to “frell” anything that was remotely Sebacean.

Meanwhile, the disease has begun to infect others onboard, causing one Kalisha to violently react, along with plenty of skin sloughing which is always a good thing IMHO. Sikuzo has developed a new plan to rescue Aeryn involving cutting the power to the space station. Back on the ship the Sebacean nurse has also contracted the disease and is most likely dead. The Scarrens bring Noranti onboard to check out Aeryn and assure the safety of the fetus. The Scarrens decided the best way to do that is to transfer the fetus to another host, in this case: Chiana, since Nebari are immune to the disease. Chiana is kidnapped and Aeryn is prepared for the surgery. Scorpy, once again, calls just in time before the procedure has begun.

Now a lot of things happen at once: John and D'Argo prepare to board the freighter, Noranti and the Station Head prepare to transfer the fetus, Noranti is encountered by the station's second in common, Scorpy is in talks with the Scarrens. Luckily the power goes off just in time and John breaks in with the big guns. The music stops just as the lights shut off. The proceeding scenes continue without music which is particularly effective.

And then the big news hits: Sikuzo may be a Scarren in disguise, it has happened before ("Look at the Princess" anyone?) and the fact that Sikuzo has heat rays coming out of her hands is a pretty big sign.

D'Argo, John, Aeryn, Chiana, Sikuzo, Noranti and Rygel get off scotch free, but Scorpy is left on the ship. Sikuzo, who has expressed something akin to adoration towards Scorpy, is suitably worried, but Chiana quickly cures her of that by knocking her out.

Meanwhile Aeryn, who can barely believe that all of this is real, shares a moment with John back on Moya. Noranti and Rygel bond over unneeded deaths (Noranti and the disease she release onto the station). It's a touching moment considering it’s between a puppet and an actor, and even more amazing because it works.

Back to John, asleep next to Aeryn, we are thrust back into his wonderful mindscape to a Nosfertu-inspired crypt scene and wonderfully played Vampire!Scorpy. God I love Farscape, because only they can pull off such a wacky scene with and still maintain the dead seriousness that runs through the show. Apparently Scorpy knows everything about wormholes because Harvey (the neural clone of Scorpy that John thought he killed a few episodes back) has never really been dead and has the ability to communicate with the real Scorpy. John doesn’t want the Scarrens to have wormhole information, so he must rescue, or kill, Scorpy, before he reveals anything to the Scarrens. So this means that John and Co. now are on a mission to rescue Scorpy.

Like: Chiana/D'Argo, suddenly serious Noranti, determined John in PK leather. John calling Scorpy grasshopper. Scorpy as Nosferatu. The glory that is projectile vomit (two times, thank you Farscape!). Sikuzo. Noranti and Rygel bonding.

Dislike: Pacing is slightly off, while the end scene was good, it felt like an odd place to end the episode. Aeryn feels off but I'm holding judgment until she's coherent.

Conclusion: Seems to be the beginning of one of those Farscape two/three parters that are better than most of the action/drama movies on the big screen (Into the Lion’s Den? Liars, Guns, and Money?).

-Altoid's Girl.

2. “DrunkStan”:

Farscape 4.19 - We're So Screwed Pt 1 - Fetal Attraction I'll begin with the bad news first. Despite some good flourishes, this episode never gets above average. However, the good news is, Part 2 of this trilogy is amazing. So, what's wrong with this episode? The pacing is sluggish, the dialogue pedestrian and some of the situations strain for credibility (and yes, I get the irony of calling one of the most wacky, out-there sci-fi shows with muppets, credible).

So, what's the story? After last weeks excursion into alternative realities, Moya's crew track the freighter that's holding Aeryn a prisoner to a Scarren border post, where it must undergo inspections for up to 5 days. This ship is approaching the end of its inspection cycle, so the crew have 2 problems to solve: they must come up a plan to rescue Aeryn, and find a way to delay the departure of the Scarren freighter. Therefore, to gain entry, the crew pretend to be Scarren spies with Scorpius as Captain. They then try to collect as much information as possible about the station and Aeryn's location whilst a plan is formulated. To delay the departure of the freighter, Rygel pretends to have a highly contagious and fatal disease that affects multiple species, thereby causing the station to enter quarantine.

What's good? You get find out more about Sikozu's species (the Kaylish) as she discreetly gathers intelligence, and also their role as a conquered race in the Scarren Empire. Noranti comes up with a novel plan to mimic the symptoms of the disease - she actually infects Rygel with the real thing, and has to start finding cures and hoping it doesn't spread to other species. Noranti's guilty speech and Rygel's intelligent advice. Some suspicious new powers that Sikozu displays. The 'Nosferatu' style return of an old character who imparts some startling information.

What's bad? In every previous encounter, every Scarren has recognised Scorpius, but in this instance, he manages to pass himself (and the rest of the crew) as friendly operatives. Despite being a 'talky' episode, the dialogue is flat and unimaginative, with no great surprises. Despite being on the clock, there's no sense of pace or urgency to the entire proceedings. The program makers seem to enjoy putting Aeryn through more and more physical pain.

Therefore, the episode is not great, but it sets things up nicely for the superb second part.

1. “Limber”:

Hey, Herc. "Fetal Attraction" is the first part of this week's BBC double-bill of Farscape, so I'll be following on with a second review shortly.

First off, I didn't like this episode as much as the last few. It felt superficial somehow - it has a lot more ass-kicking and twisty action bits, but they seem to be about manufactured problems. I mean, a lot happens, but it all feels like filler. Eh. So this review might be a little dispirited. Anyhow, here's the situation:

Moya's about to dock at a Scarran outpost, one of the border stations that lies between them and Katratzi. The crew's fractured: Sikozu's gone on ahead, disguised as a diplomat; D'Argo and Noranti are also away; and Scorpius, Chiana and Crichton are aboard Moya. Crichton looks like he hasn't slept in about 72 hours - seriously, his skin is flushed, his eyes are red, his voice is wavering. My guess is that he hasn't slept since Aeryn was kidnapped (and good on Browder, with the man-possessed look). The plan is that Scorpius will pose as the captain, while Crichton is a Peacekeeper spy. They'll be quarantined at the station for a bit, then try to make their way to Katratzi and rescue Aeryn. But when they get onto the station, the first thing Sikozu tells Crichton? Aeryn's on the Scarran transport currently docked at the station, but it finished quarantine in half an arn. Dun-dun duuuuun! Credits.

Okay, I have to admit that I couldn't really keep track of many things this episode. I mean, one could fanwank the backstory here, but really - should we have to with this show? Apparently, D'Argo and Noranti were hanging back "just in case", and Sikozu was sent ahead as a scout. The problem is the way they come together in this episode - I was constantly confused as to who knew who, who was pretending to NOT know who, who was where, what the hell the plan was... ack. So I'm going to spare everyone the intrigue and stick to the plot points.

The Rygel/Nortanti storyline: He pretends to have a plague, ensuring lockdown quarantine conditions for the entire station and buying everyone some time. Noranti answers a message for healers, and when she arrives to "heal" Rygel, she realizes the med officer can't be fooled so actually gives Rygel the highly-contagious disease. Noranti and Chiana are both immune, but the rest of the crew are vulnerable - especially Aeryn. Over the course of the episode, at least two innocent people die because of Noranti's plague; she's very businesslike, but killing people (and nearly killing Rygel) takes a toll.

Crichton finally thinks up a clever way to get onboard the transport: he hits on Vreena. When she doesn't fall for his fratboy-style charms, he proposes a plague cure-for-sex deal. This gets him onto the transport, but then he gets a little carried away and tries to save Aeryn, and gets caught doing so. Which leads to torture-by-Jenek. Hee! Crichton's answers to the heat-torture questions are really quite good, especially since he's telling a sort of truth the entire time. Scorpius arrives in time to spirit him away, and Crichton's lurching around - does heat-torture make humans drunk? Hee again.

But now we get to the part that I really liked - the Chiana/Aeryn subplot. Nurse Vreena's contracted the disease and died; Jenek realizes that this means Aeryn could be infected. She's already weak, so it's likely that she'll die, and that means the baby (which is what really interests Jenek) will die too. So he decides to cut his losses: the Scarran goons grab Chiana (remember, she's immune to the plague) and cart her back to the transport, where they prep both women for surgery. The plan? To transplant the fetus from possibly-infected Aeryn to immune Chiana. Noranti gets dragooned into performing half the surgery, and Aeryn is frantic about losing her child. She's drugged to the gills so her protests are weak at best, but she's also had some birth hallucinations involving Crichton and her reactions only emphasize last week's MaternalAeryn vibe. Chiana's not thrilled with this all either, by the way - especially since major surgery will likely kill Aeryn. I totally didn't see this one coming, and knowing this show, I had no idea how it might turn out. And I'm not telling, because it was the only part of this episode that I enjoyed watching again and again.

And then there's the denoument, which is predictable but confusing nonetheless, so I'm not going to go into the specifics. Scorpius does not respond well to heat-torture and spits Tang all over the screen. Sikozu does something with her hand that I don't think she should be able to do. Claudia Black looks incongruously lovely in that buttery-yellow colour. Here's the surprising bit: the denoument comes loooong before the end of the show. Once (almost) everyone's back on Moya, Crichton has a dream starring... Harvey. He's back, and in a very Nosferatu dream sequence (hee, by the way) he reveals that he's not only still kicking around, but that he's chosen a side. Scorpius' side - the one what will end the Scarran threat forever. And while Crichton may not care about Scorpius and his agenda, he will care about this: Harvey's spilled every one of Crichton's secrets, so under torture, it's likely that Scorpius will tell all - including the wormhole technology. So "You must rescue Scorpius, John! You must go back! Tell her! Tell her!"

To Be Continued!

Highlights: Sikozu's boyfriend's kinda cute. D'Argo and Chiana - aww. D'Argo deploys his tongue judiciously. Ummm... is Sikozu supposed to be able to do that thing with her hand? All and any Crichton-Aeryn interaction, obviously. Crichton's seduction routine, when he looks like he's dangling a fish from his mouth. The Nosferatu sequence - hee. And just a question, but does ANYONE have a photo of Crichton? A Scarran Most Wanted list, perhaps? Because to have John larking about on outposts when seemingly the entire Scarran race is after him seems a little slack... Invest in fax machines or something, people. Yeesh.

5. “Charlie & Tex”:

Following on from the previous episode, the crew of Moya form a rescue plan to save Aeryn from the clutches of the Scarrens, who have an unhealthy interest in her unborn child.

This is a typical “nose-around-an-alien-spaceport” story for Farscape – it also throws in the feeling of a caper storyline, which is also not unusual for the show.

After tracking the Scarren freighter carrying Aeryn to a space station, our heroes try to devise a plan that will enable them to bypass the heavy security surrounding the Scarren ship and save the dark-haired-lass-with-the-dodgy-British-accent from a fate worse than birth.

After Rygel eats too much bad food & has a Technicolor yawn reminiscent of Bletch in Meet the Feebles, the station is locked down and all docked vessels are forbidden to leave, for fear of spreading a communicable disease that has lain dormant within the Dominar for some time.

Sebaceans and Hynerians are susceptible to the disease, which Noranti thoughtfully infects Rygel with, in order to make his performance convincing, prompting the medical crew holding Aeryn to kidnap Chiana and transplant Aeryn’s fetus into her, as Nabari are immune to the plague sweeping the station, even though Aeryn will probably not survive the procedure.

It is now a race against time to rescue the mothers-to-be before Aeryn loses her life and Chiana has hers ruined by an unplanned pregnancy…

The episode ends with Crichton discovering that Scorpius’ subconscious alter-ego is not quite as dead as he thought, and Crichton now has to go out and rescue the real Scorpius before the Scarrens discover that he has the same knowledge as Crichton buried deep in his mind…

This episode of Farscape contains the kind of build-up that has been seen many times over, with a central character facing the kind of medical nightmare that David Cronenberg likes to dream about. The standard policy of making the antagonists of the show as “hissable” as possible works very well here, as they chose character actress Sandy Gore, who has made a career of playing nasty pieces of work who get their comeuppance in the end (she was brained with a kettle in Prisoner). Shane Briant, most known for playing the lead in A Country Practice (Claudia Black was also in that show) turns in a suitably menacing performance as a Scarren freighter captain.

With only two more episodes of Farscape to go before the end, it is more of a pisser that this show is going to be dropped into the televisual abyss that other more deserving shows have since avoided

As the late Professor Stanley Unwin used to say – Goodely byeload.

I am – Hercules!!

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