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Published on Monday, July 3, 2006 - 8:47am |
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Quint, The Crusty Seaman, scrapes the barnacles off of the DEAD MAN'S CHEST!!!
Ahoy, squirts! Quint here. It just so happens that on this day, the 10th Anniversary of AICN, I saw one of my most anticipated movies of the summer. Being in Wellington, NZ for the summer (their winter... fuck Austin's 100+ degree weather... love the city, but damn...) has made it a bit harder for me to see the season's summer movies pre-release. I lucked out and saw SUPERMAN RETURNS and THE OMEN remake early enough to review 'em and then along comes Capt. Jack Sparrow's flick. Down at the local Readings chain, they partnered up with a charity called Variety Children's Charity to "premiere" PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN: DEAD MAN'S CHEST here a few days pre-release. I bought up my $25 ticket, happy to have donated to a good cause and happy to be seeing this flick early.
I flipped for the first film, but I'd wager a whole lot of that has to be credited to my expectations going in. Gore Verbinski directing and Johnny Depp starring sounded great, but the nasty taste of THE HAUNTED MANSION was still in my mouth. How could they possible make a good movie out of a kid's ride?
Then I saw it. I don't think a more fun movie has been made in the '00s. Just out and out pure fun and enjoyment. And for god's sakes, it was a ghost pirate (or pirate ghost?) movie. The big Disney tentpole summer flick was a haunted pirate movie. So damn cool.
Audiences thought so, too, and here we are with PIRATES 2 and 3 filmed back to back with all the principal cast back, Verbinski behind the camera and a gigantor budget.
My immediate reaction isn't disappointment, thank God, but it wasn't quite the flick I was promised by some early word (ahemharrymoricough). It's a solid, solid flick that is totally in tone with the original and has some amazing new characters and set pieces, but I think I may be one of the only AICNers who prefers the original film to this one.
But that might change. I'll tell you why in a second. Before that, be warned of spoilers. I won't go so far as to ruin the twists and turns of the movie, but I may go into some plot points you might not want to know. You have a basic idea of my feelings in the safe, spoiler-free territory above. Also know that I am absolutely champing at the bit to see the third film next summer and I wish to the movie gods it was coming this year.
First off, it was great to see our cast back together again. I believe I read in either Harry's or Moriarty's reviews (skimmed the very beginnings of both in order to not spoil myself) that the film is the EMPIRE STRIKES BACK of the series. That's very apt for more than one reason. The most obvious is that it ends on a giant cliffhanger. The final shot of the movie (pre-credits... stay afterwards if you want to another piece of awesomeness) made me smile and a bit giddy for the next flick. It wasn't totally unexpected, but still very much what I want to see.
There's also a bit of the multi-story lines going on. Capt. Jack is off doing his thing, Will Turner is off doing his thing and Elizabeth is off doing her thing, all trying to meet up with each other (well, except for Jack) and all briefly criss-crossing paths at different times. I really dug this about the film, but I have to admit it did make things slow down a little bit more than I would have liked. The movie is more than 2 1/2 hours long and it feels like it. It's not an unpleasant 2 1/2 hours, to be sure, but it didn't fly by like some of the better long flicks will do.
As for the good Captain, it was great seeing Depp at play again, but there was something just a tad off. Something different from his flawless and immediately likable performance in the first movie. I couldn't quite put my finger on it, but my buddy, Kraken (named after the Harryhausen creature, not the Davy Jones' muscle in this flick), and I were talking about it and he said something that fit exactly what I was feeling.
In the first movie he was playing a fool that was hiding a great pirate on the inside and in this one he's a great pirate hiding a cowardly fool.
Which does fit his character, but it's something I personally didn't want to see, at least not as much as I wanted to see him as he was in the first movie. His arc in this movie is pretty obviously headed in the heroic direction and hopefully that'll pay off.
Now we're to why my opinion of liking the original more than this one might change. I think the third film will be very important to how I am able to look back at this film. If it takes the characters to the right places, answers the right questions correctly and is as huge as I think it's going to be, then I will forgive any minor faults I see here, as this film is obviously a set-up movie. Lots of exposition, lots of chess pieces moving. I'd actually look at it as one big story that way and probably end up not picking favorites.
So, let's talk a bit about Davy Jones, played by Bill Nighy. Goddamn, what a great effect. He looks so great in the movie. Some of the best work ILM has done in years is on display in this flick with Jones, the crew of the Flying Dutchmen and the Kraken. Each character feels like it has a place and real weight in this world. Each character looks like it poses a real threat to any of our heroes. Great job to the effects crew and special kudos to Nighy for making one of my favorite villains of the year.
The acting is top notch, the direction is up to par and the photography is simply stunning. This is a huge event movie and depending on where the 3rd film goes, this could be one of the best continuing series of films we have going right now. I highly recommend it. I had some minor problems, but I honestly had more problems with SUPERMAN RETURNS and I really, really liked that flick.
Hopefully I'll be back later in the day to submit another Anniversary article, this time looking at my 10 favorite dirty jokes from the nearly 200 interviews I've done for this site. That'll be a fun one! 'Til then this is Quint bidding you all a fond farewell and adieu!

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Reader Talkback
make it so by JeanLuc Dickhard | Jul 3rd, 2006 08:54:34 AM | It cannot be worse than the
first one, can it? by SalvatoreGravano | Jul 3rd, 2006 08:56:21 AM | The first one was pure ASS. by PORKY | Jul 3rd, 2006 08:59:07 AM | Arrrr Matey by kbass | Jul 3rd, 2006 09:10:49 AM | The Sun by naughty pirate | Jul 3rd, 2006 09:12:34 AM | no mention of depp by ectocriminal | Jul 3rd, 2006 09:43:41 AM | Didn't Haunted Mansion
come out *after* POTC...? by Osmosis Jones | Jul 3rd, 2006 09:46:22 AM | Bill Nighy is a god. by Gul Shah | Jul 3rd, 2006 09:53:49 AM | I think Haunted Mansion did
come out after POTC by Thorfin | Jul 3rd, 2006 10:33:39 AM | Its Ghost Pirate by TheRealFragger | Jul 3rd, 2006 10:49:55 AM | Where did the Resident Evil
talkback go? by Shermdawg | Jul 3rd, 2006 11:04:01 AM | Ya know, by Orbots Commander | Jul 3rd, 2006 12:00:22 PM | Problems with Superman Returns by Fernwick_ | Jul 3rd, 2006 12:01:07 PM | Superman isn't solar
powered by I Dunno | Jul 3rd, 2006 12:14:55 PM | I Dunno by Fernwick_ | Jul 3rd, 2006 12:16:04 PM | Ok, dug it up on Wikipedia by Fernwick_ | Jul 3rd, 2006 12:22:22 PM | Fernwick, watch the movie,
then comment(spoilers) by Nerdboy1423 | Jul 3rd, 2006 12:25:50 PM | NERDBOY by Fernwick_ | Jul 3rd, 2006 12:31:21 PM | What did the pirate say ... by Lamerz | Jul 3rd, 2006 12:33:44 PM | This movie will kick ass. by finky089 | Jul 3rd, 2006 12:38:39 PM | I heard Quint like semen. by TenaciousDoc | Jul 3rd, 2006 12:52:45 PM | I mean crusty semen. by TenaciousDoc | Jul 3rd, 2006 12:53:25 PM | I mean he's a crusty
seaman. by TenaciousDoc | Jul 3rd, 2006 12:54:12 PM | I think I was right the first
time. by TenaciousDoc | Jul 3rd, 2006 12:54:45 PM | Quint scrapes crusty semen off
his chest. by TenaciousDoc | Jul 3rd, 2006 12:56:01 PM | Pirates is the most overrated
tripe ever by b3mike | Jul 3rd, 2006 01:15:09 PM | I regurgitated some cow last
night. by TenaciousDoc | Jul 3rd, 2006 01:20:54 PM | When did we start rating
tripe? by TenaciousDoc | Jul 3rd, 2006 01:23:08 PM | Did they really... by DwightSchrute | Jul 3rd, 2006 01:23:37 PM | Johnny Depp + Giant Squid =
good times had by all by JohnGalt06 | Jul 3rd, 2006 01:28:55 PM | bah english d's nuts by JeanLuc Dickhard | Jul 3rd, 2006 01:41:49 PM | Johnny Depp's character
Captain Jack Sparrow... by TenaciousDoc | Jul 3rd, 2006 01:45:49 PM | Orbots Commander by DwightSchrute | Jul 3rd, 2006 01:46:19 PM | I am tired of big summer
blockbusters by TenaciousDoc | Jul 3rd, 2006 01:58:58 PM | AND Harry ass-fucking gay
directors with his thumbs by TenaciousDoc | Jul 3rd, 2006 01:59:49 PM | Alien: Dead Man by CuervoJones | Jul 3rd, 2006 02:00:56 PM | and Superman flies on a
spaceship by CuervoJones | Jul 3rd, 2006 02:03:25 PM | Fernwick_ by ManosTHOF | Jul 3rd, 2006 02:10:45 PM | Spidey 3 teaser by soulsonic | Jul 3rd, 2006 02:21:33 PM | Ass Pirates of the Carribean:
Key West Limey Pie by Big Bad Clone | Jul 3rd, 2006 02:25:03 PM | Wouldn't superman not be
able to come back from Krypton by Novaman5000 | Jul 3rd, 2006 02:25:55 PM | That should be "if HE went
there". by Novaman5000 | Jul 3rd, 2006 02:27:01 PM | Haunted Mansion DID come out
after POTC. by Lenny Nero | Jul 3rd, 2006 02:36:34 PM | He used a ship to go there by AshFett | Jul 3rd, 2006 02:46:53 PM | Transformers by BRUTICUS | Jul 3rd, 2006 02:58:49 PM | Well said by Fernwick_ | Jul 3rd, 2006 03:06:53 PM | Where's the Resident Evil
3 talk back? by DrifterSage | Jul 3rd, 2006 03:07:16 PM | Lick my plank by RingwormPete | Jul 3rd, 2006 03:17:38 PM | Tha's weird, because my
BATMAN BEGINS arrived hot... by slone13 | Jul 3rd, 2006 03:23:36 PM | There's something
disturbing by TenaciousDoc | Jul 3rd, 2006 04:19:04 PM | Domino's Pizza... &
Batman? by Fernwick_ | Jul 3rd, 2006 04:35:32 PM | BATMAN BEGINS was fuckin great
... by Lamerz | Jul 3rd, 2006 04:48:17 PM | Oh, and I thought the first
POTC was very good by Lamerz | Jul 3rd, 2006 04:53:00 PM | Pirates by stonehenge | Jul 3rd, 2006 05:03:52 PM | Batman Begins was a 2-hour
fucking nap- by stonehenge | Jul 3rd, 2006 05:11:04 PM | Bale did just fine as Bats ... by Lamerz | Jul 3rd, 2006 05:15:15 PM | Fenwick- Superman in
spaceships..... by Hairyscaryballs | Jul 3rd, 2006 05:20:38 PM | Actually, I agree with
everything that Lamerz said... by stonehenge | Jul 3rd, 2006 05:22:05 PM | It seems you either love or
hate pirates..... by Doc_Strange | Jul 3rd, 2006 05:51:01 PM | Bruce Wayne is arrogant. by CuervoJones | Jul 4th, 2006 04:22:02 AM | well the critic for my site
loved it by JoeyRusso1290 | Jul 4th, 2006 07:33:42 AM | Novaman5000 by smackfu | Jul 4th, 2006 08:47:43 AM | CuervoJones is partially
right... by stonehenge | Jul 4th, 2006 02:40:06 PM | I'm afraid that jayjew (?)
is at least partially right. by stonehenge | Jul 4th, 2006 02:52:07 PM | Jayjew, you ignorant slut. by cantankerous | Jul 4th, 2006 02:52:46 PM | Wayne IS a Prick by Saluki | Jul 4th, 2006 03:00:28 PM | It's hardly a ringing
endorsement... by stonehenge | Jul 4th, 2006 04:13:57 PM | On the other hand... by stonehenge | Jul 4th, 2006 05:48:22 PM | Who's #1 stonehenge? by Gigol-o Joe | Jul 5th, 2006 11:27:22 AM | stonehenge by fpuk99 | Jul 5th, 2006 12:04:51 PM | re: stonehenge by cantankerous | Jul 5th, 2006 12:38:47 PM | To fpuk99: Don't think
that I meant by stonehenge | Jul 5th, 2006 01:22:40 PM | As for Gigol-o Joe, by stonehenge | Jul 5th, 2006 01:33:07 PM | bummer by monkeybrow | Jul 5th, 2006 04:53:13 PM | Actually, monkeybrow, it's
60%... by stonehenge | Jul 5th, 2006 07:25:05 PM | boned again by cantankerous | Jul 5th, 2006 07:58:18 PM | Yo, cantankerous... by stonehenge | Jul 5th, 2006 10:32:38 PM | Other superior sequels
include... by stonehenge | Jul 5th, 2006 10:45:35 PM |
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